What's the quickest and most painless way to become an hero?

Shotgun loaded with buckshot, barrel in the mouth, at an upward angle. The brain stem is obliterated before the brain can even process the sound or the prain. Instant unconsciousness, zero pain, zero noise (for the corpse), organs shut down in 34 seconds or less. This is the way I'm going to go on June 25th.

Please don't arrest me for this FBI/NSA, I'm not telling people to kill themselves.

>>34559887
the people who knew that are not on r9k anymore, and so are a few who didn't know it as well as they thought
it's your call pal

>>34559923
Why the specific date?

>>34559887
>What's the quickest and most painless way to become an hero?
Becoming a school shooter. The adrenaline will make any shot on you less painful.

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>>34559887
Pick dual humanity as your starting gift, run past all the enemies you can and summon a phantom to do all your work for you.

>>34560023
Newfag know some history please

>>34560144
Thanks for really makin me think friendo.

>>34559887
There is no painless way. You must have a lot of pain in order to want to be an hero.

>>34559887
By anonymously creating danger and unanonymously fixing it.

>>34560023
That's the date when I pay off the last student loan cosigned by my mom. Once I pay it, she is off the hook.

>>34560830
I never understood this?

Why do you care you'll be dead? All the arguements about it being a dick move doesn't mean much since you don't carry guilt with you.

Hell, if it's so bad for her she can kill herself and the debt never gets collected.

>>34560865
it just feels wrong to leave her with the debt. I was a burden in life, I don't want to be one in death.

>>34560897
Does life insurance pay out if you an hero? I'd it that if I ever decided I was going to.

>>34560938
A life insurance company won't pay death benefits if the policyholder commits suicide within a specific period of time after their policy takes effect. In most states, that period is two years. However, after those two years are up, the suicide clause no longer applies.

>>34560897
Again, why does it matter? Why is suicide only an option for you?

Think about it. She lives her life and her shit son offs himself. She either deals with it and pays the debt or offs herself because she couldn't take it.

We could get a chain of suicide going and no one would be able to stop it because we'd only be harming ourselves.

>>34560964
Are you genuinely autistic? He isn't doing it to avoid feeling guilty, but because he knows that life will go on for other people after he's gone and is making a decision on how he is going to affect it while he's still conscious.

>>34561009
No but it makes no fucking sense. It's fuckint basic game theory.

If there's an afterlife he's fucking himself over so why should he car about make other suffer for a little? If there is nothing then he really shouldn't care because his consciousness will cease to exist.

Let's be honest if he really cared about his mom he wouldn't kill himself. Most parents would gladly pay the debt if it meant keeping their child alive.

I'm just saying that from the suicidal perspective it makes no sense since the suffering of others makes no difference to you when you're dead.

>>34561218
Some people are too prideful to admit, even to those that are closest to them, how much pain/suffering they are in.

In reality he probably just doesn't want to kill himself.

>>34561218
why do you care about what he is gonna do.

fuck off

>>34561218
>basic game theory.

i dont think means you think means jpg

>>34561695
This seems the most logical.

>>34561720
Because suicidal people intrigue me. I feel like there's a ton of potential to use suicide to save the world.

>>34561747
You're right I hardly do. I dicked around in that class and still managed to land an A. Second easiest math class only beaten by applied linear algebra.

>>34561834
definitely autistic if you can't infer even the most basic of his emotional decision making here.

>>34561858
I guess sarcasm is wasted on the simple, huh?

I'm joking, mostly.

>>34559887
Heroin overdose

Don't listen to anyone else on here.. I have watched it happen to people, but obviously they snapped out of it or I would punch them so hard that it kept them from going over the edge..

They just go out that's it, no pain, no suffering in a massive wave of euphoria that possesses their entire being (body). When they came back, absolutely no recollection of what just happened just shook it off and acted like nothing just happened.

>Heroin overdose is the real red-pilled way to go

>>34561885
You shouldn't be. Suicide is interesting. It's what happens when someone loses all notion of self preservation- the one force by which some would say all human actions are taken/justified.

>>34561988
Well that's where the "mostly" comes in.

If society were tolerated think how quickly things would fall apart. Suicide has also been proven to have a level of "contagiousness" so it's maybe one of the oldest memes that has been actively suppressed in virtually all societies.

pentobarbital poisoning

>>34561909
Heroin overdose only takes about 20 seconds to occur when injected

It is the best method.. still the same kid btw

>>34561218
People are not always perfectly logical autists. What he's doing will allow him some feeling of closure.

I admit that as time goes on I'm caring less and less about what will happen once I'm finally dead, but even then... us humans are emotional, social creatures. Many of the fears that plague us in life also make us afraid of death. "What will they think..." shouldn't matter if you're not here, but you still get a feeling like you're being desecrated if you let it happen willingly.

For instance, I'd like to find a way for people not to assume things about me which are untrue once I kill myself. I know that it doesn't matter and I know that I shouldn't care about it since I'll be dead and all, but still... I am a human. I evolved to care because at some point in our development as a species, caring about what others thought was very, very important. Hell, it's still important, though less so now that there are so many people around you might as well just be a number.

Still.. we call ourselves robots for many reasons, but being a souless automaton is not one of those.

>parents don't need life insurance because if they die in an accident, they won't be around to feel the emotional pain of their spouse and children left in financial ruin

Not entirely painless, but this is my ideal method of suicide.
>Travel to the Arctic Circle
>Acquire generic suicide pills like sleeping pills to OD on
>Acquire a boat, then drive it really far North
>Find a good-sized iceberg to sit on
>Lay down and assess life
>Pop all of the sleeping pills, then slowly go into a permanent slumber surrounded by the wide ocean
>Drift off into the unknown

>>34562562
> it doent work
> you wake up as a bear starts biting you
> you're too weak and cold to do anything about it
> live out last moments in agonizing pain as bear tears you apart bite by bite

I'd agree that you're very unlikely to not die with this plan, which is already a big plus as far as suicide plans go.

>>34559923
My birthday is on 25th of June

>>34562590
>bite by bite
Looks lije the bear had big grylls.

>>34559887
Not telling you we might have lost one of our robros last night RIP

>>34563671
What a nice gift that anon is giving to you.

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>>34564711
Don't make me ask