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Anonymous
At what point is it too late to for love? 2017-02-01 06:05:26 Post No. 34559436
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At what point is it too late to for love? 2017-02-01 06:05:26 Post No. 34559436
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My entire life I've always wanted a girlfriend.. I even told myself I would go for any woman on the one rule she wasn't morbidly obese. I would always say to myself and online that if I had a girlfriend it'd solve so many of my issues, my desire for love and acceptance for example.
I would call myself a guy with a high sex drive. I love to fantasize and day dream all the time about sexual situations. But I've never been with a woman before or even kissed one and I'm 20 years old. So I have a great idea of what I want and I fantasize tons about the future I want with a woman..
This is how I knew that I had drifted too far. The girl that I always wanted came to me, my friend had set us up and she was always the one pushing our relationship forward. She always wanted to french kiss, hug, meet up.. She was skinny with a nice ass, she dressed badly but it didn't matter to me.
But even with all of this, I felt out of place. Like all of those feelings and imagination of how much I wanted a girlfriend and love dissipated from my mind, and all I could think of was the anxiety of intimacy.
I had realized that what I had been wanting and desiring my entire life made me feel like an alien when I finally had it. I didn't have any pleasure from her even though I should have, just blankness, like an abyss of emotion. She was all over me, initiating the calls and texts, and it just felt like work. I didn't even have the mental notion to fuck her.
My imagination was what I wanted, not a woman. Even though I had been craving a woman so much my entire life, when I had her I wanted nothing to do with her.
Perhaps I was too late to catch the train of intimacy and love. Perhaps I'm too far gone.
I broke up with her. Then eventually I started to fantasize and imagine again. And whenever I wish for a girlfriend, I think of her, then I stop myself from hating myself for the reason of not having a woman in my life.
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>>34559436
has anyone ever had this feel?
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>>34559436
>20 years old
>have friends
>had gf
>"I'm too far gone"
Fuck man, I'm 21 KHV and I never for a second think I'm "too far gone". There are 30+ year old wizards that lurk this board, and you're complaining about your first relationship not being what you were expecting?
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>>34559436
Words can't describe how closely I can relate to this OP
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>>34559765
What's holding us down is not some inferiority complex, but showing off our "true" face. We are chasing something we imagine us so perfect, so pure that the only thing that will ever sufficently statisfy us is the otherworldly power of our imagination.
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>>34559436
Its not too late, 20 is very young. I had that feel throughout most of my teenage years. It was agonizing and I was deathly afraid that I would never find true love. Since I was in high school, I had crippling intimacy problems. The thought of initiating a kiss crippled and terrified me. The process of initiating sex, even more so. I was constantly analyzing and deliberating the steps over in my head. First, I would put my hand on her inner thigh, then I would turn to her and look at her lips. Then, we would start making out and so on. But the thought of sexual intimacy terrified me and my fear of it ruined a couple of relationships. Eventually, I kissed a girl for the first time after a date in her parents' driveway. It was very quick but felt like an incremental step forward. In my freshman year of college, I had my own car and phone so I could use dating apps such as Tinder.
I met a fat chick and we started flirting over the phone. She wanted me to come fuck her in the ass, and I drove two hours since I didn't care about anything other than losing my virginity. We had agreed to have sex before, so it wasn't very awkward. We sat down on her couch and she put her hand on my hard cock. We started making out and took each other's clothes off. I became disgusted when I saw her fat rolls and her ass wasn't completely clean, but I was desperate to lose my virginity and did it anyway.
Eventually, I got a girlfriend and was not (as) afraid to initiate sex anymore due to my experience. The first time I did it was after we both got drunk so there was no tension or awkwardness whatsoever. We ended up having an ideal romantic relationship, perfect even. By now all of my fears of intimacy were gone. But eventually she left me out of the blue for another guy which hurt but I got over it. I don't really care for the idea of romantic love as much since then, because it was incredibly painful for me when she left.
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>>34560156
So basically, it was all about taking incremental steps for me. If you can get used to the idea of kissing, you can get used to the idea of making out next, and so on. Also, alcohol helps. As does being extremely horny. Girls can pick up on your horniness and it turns them on as well. Don't fap for several days and start taking maca or horny goat weed. If you get horny enough before a date, the anxiety goes away because you can't think of anything else. And let her catch you staring at her tits a couple of times or something. Reading PUA shit helped me out alot once I had enough confidence to use it. Basically, it's all about incrementally pushing your boundaries which takes alot of courage and willpower but when you look back after a while, your fears from a few years ago begin to seem laughable.
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>>34559436
It depends on what your problems are. 20 could definitely be too late if you have fundamental physical limitations that make you unattractive to women. What are the measurements of your body? How tall are you? Do you have narrow shoulders? Do you have small wrists and hands? Do you have an ugly face? Do you have a small dick?
It will also be next to impossible to develop the necessary social skills when you're past the age that you were supposed to develop these skills.
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