Describe your gf

She's got curly, shoulder length hair and brown eyes
She's slender and a bit shorter than I am
She studies Philosophy, we met this way
We both browse 4chan
She likes old French movies, abstract, New-American-Cinema style stuff, Herzog and Monty Python
We read together a lot, gift each other a book monthly
We smoke weed a lot together
She's sleeping beside me now

>>34554326
That sounds so comfy, anon :'^)

>>34554326
>only shoulder length hair

DYKE DETECTED

EVERYONE BAIL

>>34554326 IS BAIT

LET THE THREAD DIE

ONLY BAIT WILL BE POSTED FROM THIS POINT ONWARD

>>34554422
As if posting in a thread like this wasn't enough of an indictment already.

How you managed to concoct the idea of shoulder length hair being dyke-ish is beyond me, but I don't come to this board often so I imagine I'm entangled in a fine net of ironic layers

>>34554114
ill tell you all about it when i get one.

File: 79465632424187975436.jpg (24KB, 320x320px) Image search: [Google]

24KB, 320x320px

She's over 300 pounds.

She smells like curdled milk.

She looks like the Slaton sisters.

She's a feminist.

I only went out with her because all her friends at work would probably try to get me fired for being a shitlord if I rejected her. Her friend is the HR manager.

I hate my life.

>>34554114
Long brown hair, brown eyes qt but not super attractive 5/10
Slightly chubby 5'4

However I am an asexual cunt so I like her because she makes my life feel more meaningful
>tells me I don't need to be perfect to have value
>soft and cuddly
>disgusting weaboo
>social outcast and doesn't talk to anyone other than me
>has a hormone imbalance so can be rather dominant
She also masturbates to shota and traps and wants me to crossdress because I am a skeleton

>>34554552
if not long hair, most likely a closet dyke

you will be getting no more (you)s from me after this post

>>34554566
red flags: the relationship partner

About 1.60m, tan skinned with brown eyes and light brown long hair. She's like a C-cup and has a pretty big ass. Thick.

We met studying (medicine) and have been dating for 3 years now. She also a salsa teacher and has done some acting.

She's a cheerful, high-spirited girl. Laughs a lot, very easy-going. Pretty insecure, mostly about her weight (she's completely fine) and me leaving her (some daddy issues). Cutesy, likes to cuddle and very good in bed.
I like her being relaxed about her feminity, doesn't gives a fuck about how she's supposed to act and what not.

She likes outdoors. We've gone camping together and traveling as well. Will probably travel together for a year next year.

>>34554114
>shy
>weeb
>christian
>kind of skinny
>gets sick all the time
>artist
>despises normies
>I'm one of the few people she talks with
>loves me unconditionally

>>34554114
Never had one
And i probably won't have one ever

>>34554822
would impregnate/10
living the dream anon.

>Asian
>5'5"
>Just below shoulder length hair (had it down past her ass for most of the time I've known her)
>Pretty average weight
>Into history
>Acts cute and friendly, but it introverted (INTJ, like me)
>Been going out 3 years
>I'd say she's the most beautiful girl I know, but objectively speaking based on average standards she's ~6/10

File: Twitter-The-first-step-is-admitting-it-f0c1ad.png (163KB, 500x733px) Image search: [Google]

163KB, 500x733px

>>34554114
You let someone in and think for a moment it's true that people can be trusted and love each other and after nine years out of the blue she tells you to fuck off and moves on within two months. I wouldn't recommend it.

>>34554114
She has a very feminine penis

>>34554114
>likes me
>likes games
>likes sitting inside comfy

No I don't have physical preferences. That's right.

>>34554927
Sounds shit anon, did she ever tell you why she left properly?

>>34554114
>Short cambodian gf
>Hates all forms of degeneracy
>Kinda fat
>Dated a closet faggot with schitzo

I feel like I did pretty well

File: _20170201_022105.jpg (109KB, 763x1160px) Image search: [Google]

109KB, 763x1160px

>>34554574
Forgot to mention she is also an artfag and draws qt pictures of us all the time

Pic related

>>34554757
>I'd recommend.

Cuck

>>34554114

What do you want to know? Shrug.

File: IMG_20170125_024141009.jpg (2MB, 4160x2340px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 4160x2340px

>>34555244

Here is my wife's butthole.

File: 1480954311578.jpg (36KB, 419x604px) Image search: [Google]

36KB, 419x604px

>>34555044
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWW not being ironic, very cute

File: 1483530997513.jpg (11KB, 250x236px) Image search: [Google]

11KB, 250x236px

>5'9"
>lanky
>wavy strawberry blonde hair to waist
>light blue eyes, practically silver
>slightly awkward smile
>pale skin
>nice ass, like randomly grabbing/10
>Bs
>has only dated one other guy
>virgin, so taking it slow with her
>likes outdoorsy stuff (gonna teach her how to shoot)
>artsy, she's great at painting and likes really obscure chill music
>surprises me by making food for me for no reason
>I make her laugh a lot
>very cuddly
>no drugs outside of rarely drinking
>shy
>loves helping people
>she volunteers a lot for charity work
>very responsible (helped raise her siblings)
>made me want to tame my self destructive behaviors of drugs, one night stands, excess drinking, smoking, close calls, dangerous lifestyle overall
>mfw typing this made me smile when I've been down all day

In a lot of ways we're polar opposites, and I don't deserve her, but we're all about each other.

I think I'll call her now.

File: _20170201_024245.jpg (722KB, 1660x2949px) Image search: [Google]

722KB, 1660x2949px

>>34555329
One of the only ones she sent that doesn't have me crossdressing in some form

She's short blonde-haired, blue-eyed, smart, accidentally funny, 171cm, A-cup. But most importantly she earns 100k and supports me in my NEEThood.

>>34555493

Your a fucking liar, anon.

About 5"3, dark hair, shoulder length hair and slim.
Pretty but doesn't overdo it; doesn't wear makeup unless were going out drinking.
Science grad, hasn't found a job in her field yet so she reads and plays games a lot (mostly Zelda, FF and that kind of thing, not the autist tier games I play).
Doesn't mind me loving the sesh, smoking weed and doing stuff with my friends.

I've got it pretty good, think we might move in together when I get home (been studying abroad for a semester), we've been together 7 years (met at 18) so it feels like it might be time for that.

Don't buy into the whole Stacey's only want Chad dick thing, normal relationships do exist in the modern day. Just keep improving yourself and doing new things and you'll probably end up in a relationship; sometimes they work out and sometimes they don't.

File: 1485399386389.png (561KB, 854x740px) Image search: [Google]

561KB, 854x740px

>>34554566

Jesus, your job isn't worth all of that.

>>34554822

>Christian

So, anal sex?

5"1, pretty average, not fat. Medium black hair, brown eyes. She's going to school so I'm pretty much taking care of her, so she spends a lot of time playing on steam and her GameCube. She has eyebags from pulling allnighters but I think that's what makes her so damn cute. She's a big weeb and when she moved in it was 80% Videogame merch and manga. Her parents nearly abandoned her so she doesn't know how to cook but she does her best to cook for me everyday and she's getting really good at it. She loves flowers, all the pictures of her when she was a kid is her in her grandmas garden. She likes doing art, has a tub full of sewing materials, markers, etc. She even made me a few plushies, but she didn't think they were good enough and tossed them. She has anxiety so going out is hard sometimes, clings to me like no other but she's getting more confident. She's really into paranormal so she goes on /x/ for wendingo threads even though she's easily spooked. She likes reading about the universe and Galaxy as well, but she has to reread them often since she'll usually forget what she's read. I think she's absolutely stunning, even if she is a shut in and has the memory of Dory. We met on a dating site so don't give up, lads.

>>34555922

>doesn't know how to cook
>does her best to cook for me everyday and she's getting really good at it

These seem to contradict each other.

>>34556016
I meant she always has to look up how to do things, she doesn't know how to cook very simple things but she's learning. Once she finally gets the hang of cooking something she makes it pretty good.

>>34555536

>accidentally funny

Great trait

>>34554114
>insecure
>pretty dumb
>very sweet
>unstable
>cute but not hot. Should lose 15lbs.
Idk, I'm not happy. I've cheated on her twice and I only partially regret it. I'm also in love with my ex.

>>34556270

Yeah, I never know how to feel about it. I thoroughly enjoy it, but it makes me feel like an asshole.

She's 5'3, medium with an hourglass body, long straight brown hair, blue eyes and pale skin. She showers everyday and smells nice and wears a little makeup when she dresses up for work.
She graduated university and makes more money than me.
She likes playing with her DS and watching movies. She doesn't have many friends and likes to spend time at home mostly. She likes Star Wars and GoT.
She is an amazing cook and keeps our house very clean. She cooks most of our meals and makes my lunches for work. Sometimes she hides love notes in them for me to find.
She is very insecure and asks me every day if I think she's far or ugly or boring. She is bossy and stubbon and asks me to come to bed early with her because she says she can't fall asleep without me. We are getting married this year.

>live over 2,000 miles apart
>she has an amazing body and face but hates everything about herself
>can be distant unless i press her on what's happening

thats pretty much it, but i love her and she says she loves me too and has no reason to stay with me if she didn't really so

File: 1476553733254.jpg (43KB, 554x439px) Image search: [Google]

43KB, 554x439px

>>34555503
Not into that desu, but you kids keep on keeping on. Still cute.

>>34556463

Have you met her in person?

>>34554931
>She has a very feminine penis
You're gay as fuck/10

>>34554326
I thought she was a total faggot until you mentioned that you smoked weed.

>>34554114
Non-existent.

eoijoefijwefwef

>>34556549

Congratulations, you are full-blown retarded.

>>34556374
that is nice very nice

File: received_1016892011787730.jpg (59KB, 720x1280px) Image search: [Google]

59KB, 720x1280px

This is her.
>we are 10 000 kilometers apart
>overweight
>really into sex
>very depressed
>she loves me very much
>i do too, but recently it started dying
Yeah.. LDR sucks.

>>34556641

Got any saucy pics, brobot?

>>34556641

Also

>10k km apart.

Where are you both?

File: received_1015335015276763.jpg (80KB, 720x1280px) Image search: [Google]

80KB, 720x1280px

>>34556674
not really, brobot. But I got pics of her in makeup, here is one.

>>34554114
She's my wife, but still sure.
Physically:
Shoulder length black hair (her nat color).
5 foot 3 inches tall.
D cup, weighs about 135 pounds, skinny without being grossly skinny.
Nice, round ass.
Absolutely perfect face, as feminine as an adult woman's facial features could be, but with thin lips.
She has a septum piercing, 5 ear piercings including a gauge in each ear, and if I remember correctly (not with her atm) 6 tattoos. No tramp stamps or stupid shit.
This part is personal, and I'm not bragging or biased, nor am I lying (why the fuck would I on an anonymous Chinese chicken recipe image board?) she is the perfect woman (physically) for me. All of her features are essentially exactly my ideal for what I want in a woman.
Personality:
She's smart (not a genius but pretty above average intelligence), genuinely funny, has great taste in music, movies, and tv. She doesn't frequent 4chan but knows I use it and thinks it's 'funny'. She's outgoing, highly values family and traditional gender roles, and gets along with plus loves my family as well.
Again, not bragging or exaggerating (and again, why would I here?) we never fight. We don't always agree on things, but we never yell/fight like most couples.
In short, I'm a very happy man. And on top of all of it, I'll be a father in about 8 more months.
Ask if anyone has any other questions about her/me/us/etc.

>>34556713
>me: Slovakia
>she: Port Aransas, TX, USA

File: 26aa6841-f118-49cf-a945-31fdcf820ed5.jpg (47KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]

47KB, 640x480px

>>34554114
Me and my gf just started dating a few days ago.

>White
>Like 5'2" - 5'6"
>reserved/shy
>brunette past shoulder length hair (around mid back)
>pretty open person with people she knows/trusts
>super sweetheart
>glasses
>doesn't drink/smoke/drugs or anything
>year younger than me
>dark sense of humor
>thoughtful (she texted me the morning after we started going out and said "Hey! Just wanted to let you know I hope you have a good day") was pretty awesome to see she was thinking of me :)

>>34556743
Kek oh God, she definitely looks like a Port Aransas girl.
t. Portland, Texas

File: 1484528409787.jpg (112KB, 538x581px) Image search: [Google]

112KB, 538x581px

>tfw robots making it

Leave. Not out of spite, either.

File: IMG_20170125_023326464.jpg (2MB, 4160x2340px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 4160x2340px

Dhgfhhffddhh

File: 1383255021186.jpg (135KB, 1120x1080px) Image search: [Google]

135KB, 1120x1080px

>>34554114
I-is it okay if ib describe my bf? This thread might be gone by the time he wakes up

>>34556833
is it bad or good?

>>34556881

Go, faux-fembot.

>>34556881

Don't spare on the wang detail.

>>34556902
Port Aransas girls are generally regarded as trashy

>>34556985
hmm, I am planning on meeting her IRL, so yeah... any suggestions?

She loves me and accepts me for who I am. I have clinical depression and a pretty bad anxiety disorder. She's a good amount older than me so she's mature. No bullshit. No games. She's hard to deal with sometimes because I am kinda shitty. But for some reason I'm who She wants. That's all that matters I think.

>>34557040

Yeah, don't. You are being catfished.

>>34557113
eh, i dont think so, I am with her since 24th September 2016 and we video called a lot and I mean ALOT. So yeah..

File: 1484339341398.png (56KB, 170x219px) Image search: [Google]

56KB, 170x219px

>>34556909
Go like go ahead?
>>34556983
O-oh okay
>6'1"
>Romanian (speaks it to me sometimes)
>messy short brown hair
>qt eye bags
>long dark eyelashes
>cute little nose
>really attractive UK accent
>good sense of humor
>always gets excited when i get on skype and is adorable
>helps me whenever I'm depressed or feeling crappy
>makes me feel beautiful
>watches me fall asleep so that i feel safe
>good at video games

And his wang is pretty great .///. It's really thick looking and smooth. He's kinda hairy down there but I really like it. He still has his foreskin, and it curves a little

>>34557193

Seems like you spared on the wang detail faux-fembot.

>>34556516
nope, i haven't. i obviously plan to at some point. hopefully soon.

>>34557287
How did i spare on the wang detail? Also i never claimed to be a fembot. I'm a gf (male)

>>34554927
you must have done something horrible to her. women dont just leave out of nowhere

>>34556722

Congrats man.

Will anon finally get an original comment? Find out on the next autistic episode, of ROBOT! NINE! KAY

>>34557334

Can we see your butthole (pussy)?

>>34554114
>about 5'3"
>average weight
>cute face
>laughs at my jokes
>cuddles 10/10
>dislikes normals just like me
>likes art and video games
>doesn't hold it against me that I'm a loser

overall I'm pretty happy. wouldn't trade her for anything

>>34554114
Really short, curly red hair, a little it tomboyish, and imaginary

>>34557552
but you two are normals

>>34557423
Thanks anon, she really is perfect.
And she's the reason I tell everyone on this board that they have a chance. I was a robotic NEET KHHV loser before I met her (via the internet) and now I'm married to the woman of my dreams. That's why I so adamantly tell robots that they all still do have a chance no matter how far gone they think they are. You all still have a chance, just don't give up.

File: kill me.jpg (245KB, 1080x720px) Image search: [Google]

245KB, 1080x720px

She's the biggest bitch alive, but is a total sweetie3.14 to me. Curls up next to me in bed and is a total sweetheart. her sarcasm is seamless. she's a bio major with a chem and music minor. way smarter than i am

pic related: it's her

>>34557628
Eat shit faggot

fhjuhfiujduhbnfiuh