How do I confess to a girl who lives abroad how I feel about

>>34487176
This is the wrong place to ask a question about confession help

how do you like someone when you haven't met them

you like the image you have of them
which is different from the "online them"
and you place too much emphasis on words
which, irl, would only be heard in passing

good for you but i'm confused how you both can like each other? without knowing how that person is in person?

>>34487176
>to a girl who lives abroad
Sorry OP, but it loos like you fell for a Romance Scam. They generate $200mil per year from these scams

>>34487232
what do you mean? it's really her but she is only pretending to like me because of arbitrary concepts like survival and money?

>>34487176

>confess

please don't do this

just ask her out to coffee

>>34487176
if you don't have any plans to visit her in the next 30 days there is no point in confessing anything as it's pointless to like someone who you can't spend time with in person

if you do plan on visiting her, just tell her you want to start a long distance relationship and you want to work with her to make it a successful one

>>34487208
You can know a person better over emails and long distance phonecalls. I don't really care what she acts like in person. OR are you suggesting I be like a normie and like someone because of how they are in person or how they look?
>>34487292
different country. I could visit her maybe once a year.
>>34487329
In the meantime just remain friends and never talk about intimacy?

>>34487329
okay but how do you know you want a long distance relationship if you haven't met? you are dating someone you've never seen in person once.

>>34487379
>are you suggesting I be like a normie and like someone because of how they are in person

well you do want to date a human being, don't you? or a figment of your imagination behind a virtual wall

>are you suggesting I be like a normie and like someone because of how they are in person

are you suggesting how they are IN PERSON does not matter?

are u in love with a ghostly apparatus?

>>34487426
I want to date her. We've talked every day for a month by which I know more about her than you would in a normie relationship where they have 2 or 3 coffees before dating.

>>34487490
>I know more about her than you would in a normie relationship where they have 2 or 3 coffees before dating.

LMAO
ok ive had enough 4chan for the day
lmao

you need help kid

>>34487286
Here how the scam works:
>scamer goes online and looks for lonely people
>scamer gets the target emotionally attached to them
>scamer may or may not use fake pictures, voices, etc.
>scamer using from a developing country
>scamer at some point claims that they are in distress or in a bad situation, since they are in a dveloping country
>the target then makes some large transfer of money to the scamer
>the scamer still remains very (but fakely) emotionally supportive of the target
>scam continues until the money stops flowing
>some single individuals have lost tens of thousands of dollars from these, and even after they know it's a scam would still send money because they have become so emotionally attached to the person

This is most likely what is happening to you OP

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>>34487523
Leave r9k and never return failed normie.
I'm 31 and I'm here looking for genuine advice.

>>34487379
>In the meantime just remain friends and never talk about intimacy?
no you make plans to meetup, if she's just there to stroke your ego then just keep telling her what you think she wants to hear and ask for nudes every now and then
>>34487410
that's online dating for you, if you have no plans to meet the person you are talking to and just talking to her to talk then you are wasting your time because 1.) what of value is she providing for you physically 2.) what are you getting out of just talking to some stranger on the internet

if you aren't going to meet up with her and make something happen don't waste your time or hers and fix whatever problems that dont allow you to meet people abroad

t. guy who tried to date a japanese girl who wanted to be with a guy from the US but couldn't even afford a passport or plane ticket

>>34487554
Don't those type of scams mostly only target senior citizens

>>34487607
They tend to be a more common target, yes. But they can happen to anyone, so long as the scamer thinks they can get the target emotionally invested in the "relationship"

>>34487176
You can talk to someone every day for 8 months and still not know anything about them. Someone can communicate with you but make you feel very uncomfortable each time it happens, where you wouldn't even want to be their friend. Longevity doesn't mean much. It depends what kind of relationship you both have.

>>34487554
The picture isn't fake.
The voice isn't fake.
Was never asked for money.

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>>34487523
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UEIDK3lEmB4

GET OFF MY FUCKING BOARD

>>34487647
You could make this argument for anything though. Are you suggesting that people didn't have relationships via letters before? How is this any different. You sound very suspicious and you should probably fix this.

>>34487669
Exactly. The way the scam is designed the picture and voice are often not fake. They do whatever they can to seem genuine. It's an actual person behind this scam, and they talk to you every day, tell you how much they love you, how great their day is when they can see you, etc. They also never ask for money right away. It can be months before they make any monetary request. What you don't know is that they are playing you and like 20 other people, and their end goal is always the money.

>>34487490
What kind of relationship starts with 2-3 coffee dates? Who has coffee dates, pleb? Why would a girl get ready for 30 minutes for a coffee she could drink in 2 minutes?

Aren't men the ones who date multiple people at a time before making it official? If she seems receptive, go for it. I know lots of girls who consider dating to happen after he expresses interest or wants to make her his girlfriend. That means dating occurs after they're in a relationship, hence "dates". It seems you want to jump into a relationship when you've never met her before. I don't understand how talking to her every day means anything. If you both connect on a deep level, sure. But know that there are people you can talk with for 5 years that don't understand who You Really Are Inside.

>>34487781
The world doesn't work like this

>>34487784
yet being with someone in person magically makes you know them instead?

>>34487803
That's why these scams can generate over $200 million a year. Nobody is expecting this type of scam or for the scam to go on for months. Do you want me to post the source for the dollar figure. It would take me a few minutes to dig it up, but I believe I remember where it is from

Be with her -> Hang out naturally -> Ask her to be your girlfriend -> Dates

saying it's a "date" beforehand is weird because i would never "date" someone i didn't like. also men seem to confuse simply hanging out for dates. like they're the only ones that think it's somehow a date in their heads, when they never said it clearly, and you're never interested in them, and thought it was platonic. when i hear 'dates', i immediately think of people who are already together and not a man trying to get into a girl's heart. everything before that is pure friendship.

guy: wanna get dinner before we go to the club meeting?
girl: yes sure!
guy (thoughts): YES ITS A DATE!
girl: (thoughts): i'm so hungry good call! what a great friend!

>guy: she said yes! she must want me!
>girl: he's a good nice person who makes nice judgments. it's smart to eat before club meeting since we'll be hungry later. cool and convenient!

how do they know if it's a date or not? how does she know if it's a friendly outing or your fantasy date? guys think being 10ft near a girl is called a "date". i'm ashamed people think coffee can be a "date" lmao. jesus. you sure you're 30 and not 1?

>>34487830
no, but you know them better than you would if you knew them online. you think talking to someone virtually gives you to the key to their soul?

you realize that more emphasis is placed on words online than in real life, right? people don't act irl the way they do online. you can't see what's real. your vision is clouded, and you fill in the blanks with your hopes and imagination. meeting them in person is much more important than online dialogue.

people type like insensitive asshats online, with 1 word replies, but irl they could be jumping at you and squeezehugging you with love. it could be the opposite. who knows? you can't think the internet creates some undeniable connection that is so special and deep beyond anything else because it's the internet. the mode of communication is new, but that doesn't mean the connection is deeper or more genuine than what you would have in person. in person is best.

>ex: there's an autist on r9k, i want to meet. i don't like him now but i hope that maybe irl he'll be super different and i'll like him then lol

until then, i would never count on personal feelings. you are in like with your imagination. you don't know her really.

>>34487918
but you can also go on dates before being bf/gf

>like if you go to different schools or hes out of school and you're in school