what's a good cult to join

desteni

He Will Not Divide Us

gregs

>>34466827
The Cult of Personality.

>>34466827

Heavens Gate or the Branch Davidians

>>34466827
freezone. all the fun wackiness of scientology without the abuse or money drain

>>34466827
Islam if you want a gf.

but if you want to ruin your life i'd recommended Scientology.

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Well do you want to devote yourself to a higher power or are you just wanting an excuse to be around people? Because you can join a club or go to a regular church if you just want to be around people.

If you want to devote yourself start reading religious texts and find your own truth then start killing people because you're a faggot

>>34466872
only a small portion of scientologists get their lives 'ruined'

>>34466827
Foreign Legion.

>>34466898
>only a small portion of scientologists get their lives 'ruined'
lol, what?

I don't have time to respond to your propaganda Scientologist shill. leave this board.

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>>34466827
The cult of the Machine.

>>34467080
it kept me from neetdom

>tfw you'll never join the Golden Dawn order
Feels bad man.

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>>34467184
>implying being a Scientologist is better than being a NEET

I may be a NEET, but at least I don't believe some bullshit about space emperors shitting emotions into cavemen.

>>34467276
i mean neither do i but now i have a job and a decent amount of friends and ive even gotten laid. i mean stay the fuck away from the sea org and youll be fine.

Start your own. Who wants to be a follower, right?

Move to the part of your country that has the highest concentration of idiots. Decide what your story is gonna be and set up shop.

Be sure to make some bizarre modification to your appearance. Maybe tape a dead possum to your left arm. You know. It symbolizes the state of society, or something.

/pol/
It's a hell of a ride too

>>34466872
i've thought about converting to islam to get a gf but they'll probably kill me when i mess up and prove idgaf their stupid cult.
how does it work anyways do i go to like a mosque and say i want to convert and they give me a qt wife wearing a ninja mask or what

>>34467470

Sorry to disappoint, but they would probably just be happy to get a convert. You wouldn't get a cutie, but you would probably be welcome with open arms and maybe even make some friends, once you convince them your are serious about the whole Islam thing.

If you happen to be wealthy, then getting a cutie wouldn't be unthinkable. I mean, muslims are a race of merchants, and social standing is likely more important to them than most people.

>>34467649
i'm moderately wealthy myself. i own a big house. i could tell them i'm looking to raise some little jihadists but when that time actually comes to teach my kids that crap i don't think i could do it.
i'm really hoping to get a qt that isn't completely brainwashed

>>34466838
came here to post this very original comment

>>34467739

Are you an American?

Myself, I live in the UK and my employer is a muslim. Truth is, they are not a whole lot more extreme than Christians. Yes, they take their holy text more seriously than the average Christian, but most muslims living in the first world are pretty much just like anyone else.

>i'm moderately wealthy

Then why are you even here? You can pretty much do whatever you want. Go overseas, maybe you can sip margaritas on the shore of Spain. Or maybe you can swim in a frozen lake over in Iceland. Perhaps you will come to love the wildlife of Africa.

Seriously, if you are "moderately wealthy", then what is the point of this? Have you done everything there is to do on this planet, and now you just want to have an Arab wife?

Raelism
You'll get plenty of group sex

>>34466827
none, make your own or be a pawn

>>34466827
/s4s/ is a great cult to join

forex is a good one

What do you think about Jehovah's Witnesses? I have thought about joining them for a while. Any pros and cons?

Join the Organization for the Organized.

>>34469862
Pros, you can opt out of holidays. Cons, you've gotta bear jahova witness jokes

>>34466827
The cult of Kek.

just become a citizen of the (((free))) world

>>34470663
shadilay

oregon

>>34470663
this, it even has tangible and coherent spiritual acausal impact on so called "objective reality"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNriNoWOtXA

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>>34467361
Why not join the Sea Org? You live on a beautiful cruise ship (or a nice mountain retreat) which serves as your monastery as you learn the inner workings of thetans and get one step closer to becoming god. Since you join for one billion years, by the end of one billion years you're pretty much guaranteed to be god.

What do you have to lose?

>>34471838
Yeah, I'd rather not get locked up into a private prison and get the shit kicked out of me by David Miscavige every day for one month per year.