Do you ever wonder if everything wrong in your life is actually indirect punishment for something you have done wrong, even if you aren't aware of it? I can't help but get the feeling that in some alternate reality I managed to sidestep something I didn't even notice and I'm living it up, meanwhile I'm only conscious of the world where I managed to fuck that up. I just have this unshakable feeling that things completely out of my control are actually all my fault and that they are specifically happening just to punish me, even though I know I'm a decent person and have lived a life where I've specifically tried not to bother anyone, at least not before being directly provoked. If any anons can relate, how do you deal with this constant guilt? I'm not even sure how I can come to terms with feeling so awful about something so abstract and out of my hands, but being aware of that doesn't help it any.
>>34432575
you have gained negative hamingja from a previous life. i have too
that is a really stupid idea.
>>34432625
That's my point, I know it's stupid but I still feel awful about it. I don't know what's wrong with me.
>>34432614
A negative what?
>>34432575
I suspect that I actually died sometime in the early 2000s, and this is actually Hell I'm in now. Everything feels so surreal and nightmarish now that it almost seems like an alternate non-reality I'm trapped in.
>>34432677
It is an ancient european theory of luck (similar to karma)
>>34432786
I had an experience like that in high school. I became totally convinced that I was dead for a few months, but eventually I stopped worrying about it as much. I suppose it could be related. I can't say that I don't suspect I'm in hell sometimes, I certainly was convinced of it back then. I don't genuinely think I am if I'm rational about it, but I can't help but wonder if this is common among people who have near death experiences and whatnot.