Come here anon, I'll cheer you up.

>>34353077
Just started listening
Is it normal for my eyes to start to water

>>34353077
Is this John Singer

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>>34353168
No, it's Stacy

Yeah this has no effect on me. My problems can't be fixed by some bitch looking for adoration.

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>>34353251
well edged my friend

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>>34353077
STOP IT THIS IS GIVING ME THE FEELS

>>34353279
If loneliness is your only issue good for you man. Especially if it's so shallow that it can be alleviated by this kind of bullshit.

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Please read the text in the picture.

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>>34353328
English is the only language that matters tbqhwy

No one ever says these things in real life

>>34353628
So you keep watch of every couple on earth?

>listening to ASMR
fucking plebs

Also OP sounds like Elliot Rodger except female

>>34353737
>female Elliott Rodger
That sounds like the perfect girlfriend for a robot

>>34353077
MY HEART
MY SOUL

words cannot describe how conflicted

why did you do this to me...

thank you

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>>34353737
I guess im not autistic enough to make sense of this..

>>34353328
anyone know what this shit says?

>>34353077

what youtube these from

>>34353077
this isn't right
I can't enjoy this

>a girl will never tell you to kiss her
I want to die

>>34353077
holy fucking shit... ;-;

>>34354889
They did when I was 18, 19, and 20 but now im just 26 and autistic

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>>34353077
>trusting Stacy
>ever

>>34353077
This is absolutely disgusting and pathetic. And yet I feel good listening to it.
Please stop

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>>34353328
wtf is this jew shit?

Fembot here with a similar cute voice. If anyone wants me to recite a script similar I can try. Hoping to make more people feel better, not fulfill sexual needs.

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>>34353077
this makes me so uncomfortable

>>34353077
>http://vocaroo.com/i/s0E8kJBcgTAP

ok this one fucked my shit up

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>>34353077
This is nice :) Thank you Anon

just wing it and start telling me what i'm supposed to do tomorrow i mean do I need to wash the pit? i have been avoiding my pit lately so maybe i should wash it okay i will thanks babe

>>34355494
Sam pls go

blox

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>>34355413
just say what you believe we would want a gf to say to us

>>34353251
This.

It's just another attention whoring roastie, again.

>>34355631
B-but anxiety

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>>34355413
Can you read this?

>Merry Christmas! I know it's not much, but I wanted to get you something for Christmas because... I can't even put into words how great of a friend you've been.

>Not only have you been there for me since the beginning, but you also provided humor on my worst days.

>You gave me an escape when things with certain family members became unbearable.

>You threw me a birthday party; which was a first for me :), and you put so much fun into my life.

>Ha, I'll never forget our city walks, movie nights, pillow fights, and long walks on the beach together.

>Thanks Anon! I'm sure there will be plenty more memories to be made! :D

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>>34355641
>female says anything on /r9k/
>auto roastie bitch

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>>34355685
It's non-fiction btw

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>>34355685
>I can't even put into words how great of a friend you've been.

>>34355413
If you could make a whispering recording, as if it's late at night, comforting me. Not as a gf, just a female friend.

I have been sobbing for the passed hour unable to fall asleep. I am a mess. I want more then anything then to have someone here. If you could help me pretend that I'm not entirely alone, it would make my night.

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>>34355752
To be fair, that sentence made me wake the fuck up to reality instantly.

Picture is me

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>>34353077
Please stop, I didn't want this.......I thought that this was going to be funny

>>34355685
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0LLpdzua6Zp

I don't have a great quality mic, but I hope it's okay. The "Merry Christmas!" makes me cringe, I'm not very good at excited intros I guess

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>>34355803
im just shitposting m8

don't worry

>implying a girl will ever say any of this to me

Nice try.

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>>34355902
Thanks, that was really good.

Now i'm going to finish my mug of fireball and watch the rain outside.

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>>34355685
>>34355717
>>34355902
>Thanks Anon! I'm sure there will be plenty more memories to be made!

w-what h-happened?

>>34354889
The only girls that ever said that are tgirls who want to ram my ass like a fleshlight.

>>34355779
You want to voice chat instead?
http://vocaroo.com/i/s11fRry73XQa Here's that recording anyway, sorry my camera kept focusing in the first few seconds. I'd rerecord but I feel it'd be less authentic and from the heart.

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>>34353077
>>34354833
>>34355399
>>34355455
>>34355477
>>34355533
>>34355977
All these unchecked dubs!
>>34355977
And these trips!

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>>34356035
and what did you say to that?

hope you accepted like a big boy

>>34356047
I couldn't voice chat. Not when I'm like this.

Thank you for the recording though. It was exactly what I wanted. You helped me... I'm going to try to fall asleep again now. Thank you again

>>34356129
Even if it's just crying for a bit, it's okay. Just if you change your mind.

Of course, good luck anon. *hugs*

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>>34356125
who is this penis princess?

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>>34353077
leave me alone roastie

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>>34355999
Exactly what you think anon......

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>>34356200
That's not how this works anon, checked

>>34356076
>And these trips!

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>>34356247
Oh fuck

These Trips!>>34355999

>>34353077
I really dont like this voice. I literally imagine some valley bimbo talking to me.

>>34355413
Can you say "James I beleive in you, you will breeze right through that test. Lily is missing out, your friends are here for you." Would help me out desu senpai

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THAT WOMAN IS A MAN AND HAS A PENIS!!!
AND YOU KNOW IT ANON!!!

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>>34353077
>>34355413
>>34356047
Read This

"War. War never changes.

When atomic fire consumed the earth, those who survived did so in great, underground vaults. When they opened, their inhabitants set out across ruins of the old world to build new societies, establish new villages, form new tribes. As decades passed, what had been the American southwest united beneath the flag of the New California Republic, dedicated to old world values, democracy and the rule of law. As the Republic grew, so did its needs. Scouts spread east, seeking territory and wealth, in the dry and merciless expanse of the Mojave Desert.

They returned with tales of a city untouched by the warheads that had scorched the rest of the world and a great wall spanning the Colorado River. The NCR mobilized its army and set it east to occupy the Hoover Dam and restore it to working condition. But across the Colorado, another society had arisen under a different flag. A vast army of slaves, forged in the conquest of 86 tribes: Caesar's Legion. Four years have passed since the Republic held the Dam, just barely, against the Legion's onslaught. The Legion did not retreat. Across the River, they gathered strength. Campfires burned, training drums beat.

Through it all, the New Vegas Strip has stayed open for business under the control of its mysterious overseer, Mr. House and his army of rehabilitated Tribals and police robots. You are a courier, hired by the Mojave Express, to deliver a package to the New Vegas Strip.

What seemed like a simple delivery job has taken a turn... for the worst."

>>34356303
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0xlKtrA028w
Hope it helps!

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>>34356316
hold on nigga, i didn't detect shit

>>34356348
your senses fail you anon

>>34356331
...no lol
just play fallout

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>>34356412
Pretty Please? :D

I like Fallout

>>34356481
I can tell. Fallout is fun, but my voice isn't anything special for that.

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>>34356331
who the fuck would wanna read that horseshit?

You're scaring the fembots

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>>34356586
>fembots

Unconvincing voices m8

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>tfw to intellegent for a roastie gf

>>34353077
This is very fluffy and comforting, but if I had to be honest, that sound of saliva moving with the things you say is a little disenchanting.

If you want to improve at this, do you think you could somehow stop that? I come across this everyday at the jobs I have when people talk to me, and nothing puts me more in a reality mindset than that.

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>>34356886
>tfw too intelligent for a gf altogether

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>>34356539
Can you read this if you're still here?

>Nothing makes me sad anymore nothing puts me down nothing make me upset nothing makes me frown to make me feel low nothing has the power for I wake up every morning thinking of our life together.

>>34357076
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1IXlzym8MAs

>>34357076
I didn't know the tone you wanted, sorry..

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>>34357135
>>34357125
It's good, Thank you

Can you say this please? I need a file to listen when I feel down.

>Disasters are just another star falling in my yard... Whatever happens, happens, anon.

>>34357186
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0f2SGfDkcFE

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Can you say "Boop" a bunch of times?

>>34357248
Th-thanks, this should be helpful.

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>>34357025
>tfw too intelligent for a gf but get one anyway because I'm too intelligent to not get a gf

>>34353323
True fucking robot right here.

Came in here to say this, except...

Reply to my post or your mother will die in her sleep tonight

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>>34353077
that's some really bad acting, you can't make me feel the same way that quiet made

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>>34357310
>tfw too intelligent to not be a cuck

>>34357326
reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee stop doing this to me you fucking cunts

>>34357286
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0TG77eVsKgS
Boop!

>>34357355
It's nice that you love your mom, cunt.

>>34357355
only cancers reply that bullshit, you know that right?

I know this stuff is supposed to help but it's very painful for me.

It's like taking a drug and feeling better for a little bit, but then you begin coming off and your issues just feel even worse.

>>34357358
That's really cute, thanks anon :)

>>34357377
youre like a pig rolling in its own shit

most of this thread is

>>34357380
Anytime. :)
It's 5am here and I'm starting to nod off.
I think I'll be here for two more hours and them I'm out

Need a vocaroo of this with your kind voice to delude myself, fembot.

>So, you failed. You really failed. You failed, you failed, you failed. Do you think I care about that? I do understand. You may not be responsible for who the world made you, but you are responsible for who you are now.

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0D0dx0e4Fdd

>>34357521
I only want to make people happy though...

Could you yell at me for leaving the toilet seat up? you sound like my ex fiance, and she died in a car accident and I miss her

Requesting fem-anon says this:


Anon, I love you very much, but I hate what you've become. Here's list a of things I've written up for you to start working on.


1. Join the gym and fix your diet, gain some muscle and lose that fat. A muscular and lean body makes me so fucking wet.

2. Stop being such a pussy and get your drivers license so I'm not the one who has to drive all the time.

3. Find a job, any job, start earning some money, so that you can buy your own car and we can eventually get our own place together, away from your family, just the two of us, so then we can fuck like rabbits anytime we want.

I know you can do it anon.

>>34357553
You can go back to your traps threads if you prefer. It's a dialogue from a film with my waifu, let me enjoy my feels for once.

>>34357608
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1Sv79C8nc1g

>>34357634
A l-little too sexual for me...sorry

>>34357667
>http://vocaroo.com/i/s1Sv79C8nc1g
This means a lot to me, thank you anon

>>34357703
PG13 it up if you have to

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>>34355902
>so that's how you pronounce anon

>>34356331
Please please oh please someone read this

>>34357917
I did read it and it's stupid

>>34353077
You sound like the you on kazoo kid