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Robots, tell us about when you went full retard in class. Don't

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Robots, tell us about when you went full retard in class.

Don't you dare say you haven't.
>>
>>34235256

>always wear oversized coat
>always be sneaking food in my backpack or eat a literal box of cereal in class
>not realize how retarded I look in the slightest
>>
>>34235256
>Be in maths
>Learning some shit about taxes
>Ask teacher to explain what exactly they are
>Argue for 2 hours about the idea of taxes
>>
>>34235256
Now why would I spend all that time repressing those memories just to go digging them up again for this shitty thread?
>>
>>34235256
>wet myself
>"I'll play it cool and nobody will notice"
>Sit drenched in my own piss until someone notices
>>
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>>34235256
>be me
>at university (college for you amerifags )
>boring as fuck lecture and my stomach is chumming because was out drinking last night
>chance a fart
>doesn't make any noise but suddenly i feel something down there, shat my pants .jpg oh fuck pants filled with semi-liquid shit cant risk leaving to clean up
>people start to smell it and are turning and looking in my direction
>i figure fuck it l'm not sitting with my pants full of shite get up slowly and waddle carefully towards the doors literally 1 meter from the door and i feel something roll down my leg look behind me see a piece of shit on the floor people are pointing and whispering
>freeze like a rabbit in the headlights
>what the fuck am i to do? leave it play it off? pretend it's not mine? take it with me?
>for some reason i decide the best course of action to pretend to faint fall over badly shoulder lands on the shit roll over to get out of shit realize how fake this looks so i start twitching really badly faked seizure nobody gets up to help everyone just staring at me rolling around on the fioor in my own shit no one buying it get up and walk out have to see these people every day
>>
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>>34235256
>6th grade robot
>the day was literally 6/6/06 and I will never forget this
>sitting in class minding my own business
>see red pen in my desk
>get the bright idea to cut it in half using those shitty elementary school scissors
>this process takes an hour or more because of my weak six grader hands
>finally chop through it
>to my surprise a stream of red ink flies into my eyes
>scream at the top of my lungs THERES INK MY EYES HELP
>flipping my shit
>everyone is laughing at me
>teacher helps me out of the class room
>tells me to go to nurse
>eyes are bright red, ink is still all over eyeballs
>see tard from the tard class hanging outside his class room
>he screams and shits himself
>only positive thing about this experience was witnessing this
>proceed to nurses office
>call dad
>had to explain to dad what happened
>wtf's were had
Not even the worst thing I did to my eyes. One time I directly shot my right eye with an airsoft gun to see what the air felt like. I was a retarded kid.
>>
>13 years ago
>be 6 yr, at class
>decide to grab scissors and cut a girl's hair because why not I guess
>get caught, teacher makes me explain what I did in front of the class

Still remember it all like it happened yesterday

This is going full retarded, never go full retarded.
>>
>>34235372
10/10 origamino fuck you mute 2 seconds bullshit go fuck yourself 4chan
>>
>at the begining of 9th grade
>During orientations i sit by myself
>Some mexican kid and a few black kids sit behind me
>The mexican kid accidentally hits my head
>I confront him
>Sayyouaresorry:(.jpg
>"fuck you nigga"
>open hand smack him
>Fight breaks loose
>get suspended
>All year i get in fights with him,a totall of 4 times
>Begining of 10th grade
>Have stupid geeeffee
>He says some stupid hit about how shes a slut
>Go ape shit and smack him like last time
>Only get in 3 fights with him that year
>End of 11th grade
>I told myself i wouldn't get in anymore fights
>I have to sit next to him in my last period math class
>One the last day he says some shit to me during class
>Go on mental break down,yelling at the teacher,and the students
>Say something about killing myself
>"lol maybe you should >:)"
>Run after the kid who said it and hit him in the head with a book
>Nearly get arrested,only reason not was because i was 17
>second semester of 12th grade
>Some jew kid starts geting pissy over me talking to his fat girlfriend
>Confronts me about it
>Tell him i don't have time to fuck with him and walk off
>"Fucking asshole don't walk away from me"
>Instantly whip back and punch him in the throat
>Almost fucking dies
>My teacher asks if i am alright
>Tell her yeah and walk to the principles office
>Officer and head principle talk to me
>Let off with a warning and set to cyberschool that had a bunch of blacks in it

My entire highschool career was a REEEEE moment.
>>
>>34235256

>be grade 6
>new teacher, young black guy with a weird accent
>he introduces himself as Mr. Robertson, asks if we have any questions for him, tells us to get to know him
>I ask him where he's from, he responds that he's from Scotland. I laugh hysterically and say "No you're not, blacks are from Africa"
>he tries to explain to me that there are black people in Scotland
>I don't believe him and keep laughing, then I start saying I'm from Africa
>he gets pissed off and changes the subject. That was just the beginning of the worst year of my life.
>>
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>>34235256
started talking about chaos theory tangent in highschool english class when the subject was about pictures

Brought in a laptop to present something with which had a katawa shojo background

Always get bright red and flustered when see qt in class that notices me staring at her

Rub my nads in my spanish class that the teacher called it out
>>
>>34235503
what the flip is cyberschool?
>>
>>34235358
I just remembered that i wet myself a few times in elementary school
>>
>>34235683
Where you train to enter the matrix
>>
>be somewhere around 13/14
>in class in religious studies or something
>watching the Pianist
>There is some scene where some nazis throw a guy in a wheelchair outside the house
>Think it is incredibly comical and burst out into laughter, the type of laughter that just doesn't stop no matter how hard you try.
>Class normies all stare at me wondering what I am doing.
>Stifle laughter a little bit.
>The scene continues, the guys drive off and bounce over the guy on the street with their car.
>laughter goes full force, twice as hard as before. one normie even joins in and gets severe looks for joining in my autism.
>get sent outside or something, i don't remember
>later get asked by some girl with an odd look asking why I was laughing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DENCBZF0wd8

vid related
>>
I literally shat my pants in class because that bitch of a teacher that enough children went to the bathroom that day
an emergency evacuation was proven to be neccessery
>>
>>34236928
Thought* origami
>>
>>34235384
Sometimes, I wish natural selection would do its part desu.
>>
>rushed to bathroom before giving presentation based on my senior research paper in English class

>forgot to zip

>Trying to speak about copyright infringement and piracy (it was on a list of topics and it seemed easy I guess, don't remember)

>My dick flops out in front of entire class

>don't show up for the remaining days
>>
>>34235529
kek middle schoolers are truly spawned by the devil
>>
>>34236905
He couldn't stand when asked There was a movie about this i laughed too jokes aside the wehrmacht was very deciplined
>tfw relized that the good guys lost the war
>>
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>>34235256
>first day of highschool
>homeroom teacher does some 'introduction' shit where we all sit in a circle and we have to think up a gesture to use in an introduction which 'tells the class something about you' or some shit like that
>going around the circle, everyone doing some gay boring gesture then introduce themselves
>i think it'll be funny if i do something dumb as hell
>my turn...
>i do a fucking commando roll into the middle of the circle, come up with a finger gun pointing forward and try to say in some badass voice "i'm anon"
>everyone starts laughing at me
>get made fun of for the rest of highschool

Also,
>strayan but history teacher is murrican
>he's talking about pearl harbour
>starts detailing jap bombing runs etc
>i yell out, "go the japs!"
>everyone looks shocked, teacher looks horrified and furious
>get detention.
>>
I gave a powerpoint pesentation on NGE in class in my freshman year of highschool. I barely talked in the class outside of that
>>
>>34236905
It happened to me too. Luckily there was other autists in my class so I didn't laugh alone, exact same scene
>>
>>34237005
underwear maybe?
>>
>>34235529
>year 8 advanced math class
>performing well academically
>have white south african teacher named Mr. Washer
>find out his first name is Richard
>repeatedly call him Dick Washer
>this always results in me getting sent to the principle
>can't stop won't stop
>get moved to the second tier math class

bit harsh to impact my education because he can't handle a little banter imo
>>
>>34237127
If parents don't discipline their stupid brats, the education system has to.
>>
I played the boondocks MLK speech scene in a HS class.
>>
>>34235256

>Be in maths
>Boring as fuck
>Start to chew a pen
>Went full retard and decide to break it with my teeth
>Break it
>My mouth is full of blue ink
>Don't want to swallow, I'm not this kind of guy
>Ask to go to the bathroom
>Teacher ask why
"Hum... A pen broke and I have the mouth full of ink"
>Everyone laugh

>Be in PE
>There is this kind of big balls that u can sit on it
>Get and idea
>Take one
>Hug it
>Run as fast as I can on a wall
>Jump on the wall
>Get rekt by the wall
>Everyone laugh

>Be in english class (non english speaking country)
>First week of school
>Must speak about our holidays
>Spent all holidays playing vidya
>Think of something funny to tell
>Worst idea ever
>My turn
"On the first week, I played video games, watched animu and didn't go outside"
>Continue
"On the second week, I played video games, watched animu and didn't go outside"
"One the third week, I played video games, watched animu and didn't go outside"
"..."
>The english teacher stare at me with disgust
>The classe stare at me

>Be in english class
>Same teacher as the last story
>Bored
>The exercice is to describe our ideal partner
>Don't want to do it
>Decide to do something funny
>My turn
"My ideal partner is like princess Zelda, but she needs wings too, so she can fly"
>Every one stares at me
>The teacher ask me if I mean I want her to cosplay
"No, I mean I want her to have wings, and if she could use magic too, that would be great"
>Everyone stares at me like a retard
>Never had to do oral exercices again

I have plenty of other stories, but it's too long to write them. I don't know how I didn't get bullied
>>
>>34235325
actually a good way to get them out is to share them on the internet
>>
>>34237371
What country anon?
also yes please more stories
>>
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>>34235372
>Play it off and faint on the floor rolling in own shit

WHAT THE FUCK ANON I'M DEAD
>>
>>34235256
>11th grade pre-calculus
>teacher asks question about blocks sliding down a plane
>go up and assert that a 45, 45, 90 triangle has sides of 1, 1, and 2
>11th grade
>make a fuss
>teacher and students don't know what to do
>>
>>34237450
Switzerland, and the other one are not that full autism. It's like I love orcas and used to draw them everywhere or tried to act like an animal or shit like that
>>
>>34235256
maybe not retard, and not technically in class, but a painful memory nonetheless

>school talent show
>it was like also a male physique show
>like the opposite of miss america type thing
>am "Mr. Badminton"
>choreographed dance at the beginning
>breathe heavily and deeply the entire dance to calm myself down because there are like 2000 girls there
>don't think anyone can see because of how far they are
>next day
>"anon why were you breathing so heavily?"
>in case you might be thinking im a normie
>part where we have to take off our shirts and walk out on the stage
>all of these teenage girls are going nuts in general
>everyone getting huge screams and applause
>I walk out
>as i walk out i get applause because I am still in the shadows
>but as soon as i emerge into the light
>you can hear a pin drop
>try to laugh it off and make a good scene doing elaborate stupid poses but everyone knows what happened
>>
>>34235256
pretty much those times when i fail the classes
>>
>10th grade
>In history class
>Teacher is talking about holocaust
>Decide that this is total bullshit
>Raise my hand
This is where i fucked up
>Talk for 10 minutes about how holocaust never happened, even shoe some shit on internet
>Throw up the heil sign and yell "heil hitler you niggers" because i thought that it will be funny
>Thrown out of school for racism and denying the holocaust.

Moral of the story:
Never explain anything to normies and don't be dank infront of them.
>>
>>34238070
Show*

Now it sounds like i shoed some shit. Goddamit. My life is a meme.
>>
>Physics
>Last class of the day
>Shitposting on the 'Chon until 3am night before
>Got up at 6am for rowing
>Tired as fuck
>Teacherman explaining why mountains are measured by sea level, how some are "tall" but not that big
>Think "I haven't said anything in a while, i should ask a question"
>Why don't they measure skyscrapers that way?
>>
>In class
>11th year
>Teacher is showing us a movie about school shooting
>The scene where they start shooting people comes up
>I cannot stop laughing because i was edgy as fuck and found stuff like that funny
>Everytime they shoot someone i start laughing even harder
>Normies all look at me
>I'm all red and almost passing out because of the laughter
>Cannotstopwtfishappening.jpg
>Almost threw up few times because of laughing
>The movie ends
>Teacher tells me to get out of the class
>She comes near me and asks what the hell was all that about
>"It was hilarious" and i start laughing again right at her face
>Teacher called my parents
>"Anon, you are going to psychologist from tommorow"
>Go there one time and say some random normie shit so i don't have to go there again
>On monday go to school
>Everyone stays away from me and no one talks with me ever again.
>>
>>34235384
>the day was literally 6/6/06
Rip all those poor people in Falador
>>
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>>34235372
>Have to puke.
>Can't hold it.
>Hm, what should I do?
>Puke on my dick piss and cum on all my classmates.
Huh, now that it's out, I feel much better.
>>
>>34235372
d e d
>d e d
Oregano
>>
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>>34235256
>tfw to emotionally neglected to remember
>>
>>34238262
scene?
orign niggaro
>>
>>34235372
Nice copy paste you transparent faggot.
>>
>>34235256
I never went full retard, the fuck would I draw attention to myself?
>>
>5th grade
>first day at new school
>teacher tells us to skip rope and present ourselves while doing it
>everyone is doing fine
>my turn
>I trip over in the first jump
>hit my head on the floor
>start crying
>everyone is laughing
>I don't show up for the entire week
>>
>be in a high school math class
>was absent a few days before
>teacher asks me what '3!' means
>have no idea why the fuck you need to put an exclamation mark after number
>there is only one logical answer, I deduce
>loudly, I say 'three!'
>everybody is confused, then start to laugh
>then I say 'three!' even louder
>tfw I became a class clown for not being able to say 'I don't know because I was absent'
>>
>gym class, 6-7th grade
>push ups exam or some shit
>have to do it in front of everyone else on the bench
>awaiting my turn to be done with it
>barely do 9th, fall exhausted
>class laughs at me for a few minutes

was the laughing stock of my class since maybe 3rd grade, so nothing unusual
>>
I masturbated in history class just about everyday under my jacket.

At the end of the year the girl I was slyly looking at muttered something like "is he staring again?" and the girl next to her made some disgusted sigh and said "yep."

They knew.
>>
>>34235256
>be 12 or something
>standing around talking to a couple of kids
>some punk pulls down my pants
>start crying and go full retard and beat the shit out of him
>everyone staring in shock
I was a good kid otherwise so the teacher just pulled me aside and talked and I didn't even get in trouble.
>>
>sixth grade, all new school where I knew no one
>first day math class, teacher says he's never said a student's last name wrong on their first day
>nobody has ever said my last name right because the only vowel is a "y"
>I start scheming
>he gets to my name and says it wrong
>I jump and yell "AHA! I HAVE DEFEATED YOU!"
>Nobody laughs
>teacher starts laughing at me
>students start laughing at me
>sit back down and try to ignore what happened
>going through syllabus, teacher gets to the part about in-class disruptions
>"I don't need any kids standing up and yelling 'I have defeated you!'"
>everyone laughs
>occasionally he makes fun of me for it throughout the year
>get that teacher again the next year

middle school was absolute hell for me. I'm sure I did even stupider things during those three years, I just can't think of what they are.
>>
I've gone full retard many times

>Be in 9th grade
>Wear the same socks over the weekend, wear same socks to school on Monday, did not shower or bathe
>Feet are itchy, take off shoes
>Smell is awful, could kill a pig
>Socks are literally stained black because my house is so dirty
>Everyone complains that my feet are too stinky and want me to put shoes back on
>Get pissy, tell everyone it's a free country and I can take my shoes off if I want
>Teacher tells me to put shoes back on
>Call her a cunt
>Sent to office
>Walk there without shoes on
>Principal complains, tells me to go home and take a shower
>Go outside and wander the streets all day instead
>Did not shower that night
>Go to school, take off shoes in class, same thing happens again
>Almost get expelled for arguing with principal over shoes
>Go home, take shower, go back to class
>Next day signs around school saying "Shirt and Shoes required in this building"

I caused them to put those signs up. Ten years later they're still on the front door.
>>
>>34241857
Another story from my youth

>8th grade
>Arguing with a girl over something stupid, probably politics (a lot of arguments over abortions and shit at my school, the super-Christian girls debated with anyone who would listen)
>Say something stupid
>She gets pissed and spits in my face
>It lands in my mouth, I accidentally swallow it she is shocked and tries to apologies
>Put my finger down throat, projectile vomit on her
>Get sent home and have to write a formal apology so she doesn't press charges for assault
>She and all the other super-Christians hate me and give me dirty looks rest of the year, school
>Not fair in my mind since she spat on me first, try to explain this but it only makes things worse
>My reputation is cemented as a nasty, filthy gross fucker
>>
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>>34235256
>this guy is acting like a try-hard, teacher's pet, etc in my introductory philosophy class
>you know the type, what he was saying wasn't even that impressive or constructive
>he had introduced himself on the first day as "having taken some time off, meaning I'm a little older than the rest of my class"
>eventually I got tired of it and I threw a pen at his head when he tried to speak
>>
>>34241658
Did you end up having a threesome?
>>
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>>34235529
Was this your teacher anon?
>>
>high school
>in class debate, I'm enjoying running circles around my inferiors
>the black kid gets up in my face after I skewer with him my patented Ad Hominem technique (learned it on /b/)
>called him a buffoon, but he heard "baboon"
>nomercy.jpg
>my rhetoric is cut short, however, when the brute choke-slams my intellectual's (and therefore delicate) body to the ground
>ACK.mp3
>Chad jumps in to save me, basically falls on top of me with his crotch in my face (his dick felt big 2bh)
>need a "comeback," my reputation is at stake
>"see you in juvie BITCH"
>all of the adrenaline makes it come out shaky and pathetic though
>my oneitis cracks up laughing
>look over and see she's recording this whole thing on her iphone
...
>"fucking NIGGER!"
>what have I done
>end up running through the halls screaming for help while everyone laughs at me, records me
>>
>>34236905
dishonest kino should always be lampooned
you did nothing wrong
>>
>>34238070
In my social studies class in grade 9 we were discussing the holocaust. I raised my hand to say something completely non racist and on topic. But I said the word "Jew" and my social studies teacher got angry at me.

I'm not sure what she wanted me to say otherwise. "The Jewish Peoples"? Is Jew by itself an offensive word?
>>
I jerked it in advaced programming my junior year at uni under my big jacket, i hope no one noticed
>>
>>34235256
Several times, but two stick out in my head

>be me
>7th grade
>really into Ben 10
>LARP as the main character, but no one can tell
>wear that watch from the cartoon show
>laughing at the table with friends one day
>friend brushes my wrist
>looks at me weirdly and grabs my wrist
>reveals it to everyone
>"holy shit, isnt that the watch from the gay tv show"
>yank arm away
>"n-no!"
>everyone calls me Ben for the rest of the year

>be me
>8th grade
>chewing paper in class to make spit balls later
>history teacher notices and scolds me in front of the entire class during lecture
>"don't you dare chew paper in my class anon!"
>awkwardly open mouth and let gross chewed paper spill out on my desk
>no one talks to me ever again
>>
>>34242210
I saw that vid
>>
>>34242445
oh no it's online :(
>>
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>>34242445
Post a link to that shit nigga
>>
>>34238377
fucking gg my negro
>>
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>>34242210
>>34242445
>>34242492
>>34242609
>I found it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v8nJkuVcuoU
>>
>>34243221
>debate class
>punches opponent
>acts like a nig
>gets angry at being called a nig

black people amiright?
>>
>>34242210
HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA LOLOLOLOL SPERRRRGGGGGGGGGG
>>
>>34241096
Kek, that could be easily confused as intentional humor anon
>>
When I was 12 I wrote a paper for english class about how I thought it would be better if everyone agreed to use swords for war instead of guns.
>>
>>34241786
If you weren't a robot that would be actually a good memory
>>
>>34242049
Legendary anon, nobody likes these guys
>>
>>34243369
Well there would be no chance of turning the world into an irradiated crater if everyone used swords. Plus you were only 12.
>>
>>34236905
>Watched Of Mice and Men in class
>The ending scene
>Teacher and class are getting emotional
>Teacher loves this move and the book and I can see her tears (wtf)
>The retard bloke gets shot and i start to laugh uncontrollably
>Everyone looks at me like im a sociopath

https://youtu.be/y8v2hvtM9_c?t=2m15s
It was pretty funny desu
>>
>>34238139

Valid question.
>>
>>34242300
She wanted you to call them kikes
>>
>>34242210
Jesus man, never run from a fight, its 10 times better to get KO'd, because at least you stood your ground.
>>
I didn't go to school besides kindergarten, so I haven't.
>>
>>34237127
I bet you're black,
>>
>>34237127
they should have punished you harder you piece of shit
have some respect
>>
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>>34243369
I wrote a paper on how my dream job would be an assassin. I was 10.
>>
>>34235256
>be me
>in English class
>in 11th grade
>A few days before the supposed 2012 apocalypse
>A few days after the Sandy Hook massacre
>teacher starts discussion about what we would do on our last day alive if the apocalypse actually happened
>Other students say random shit they would do
>Then it's my turn to talk
>I say that I would kill a bunch of people
>Have to deal with endless amounts of bullshit after that day
>>
>>34241786
It sounds like it was he that defeated you anon, not the other way around
>>
>>34237127
>flee from racial violence to start a new life in a new country giving my life to educating the children
>some little fag calls me dick washer
>>
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>>34243595
I did that when i was 7.

Other story
>be me in middleschool
>have religion
>always do cat sounds "meow meow" in the back seats
>teacher says "He'll being cat food"
>"I bet it's gonna be a feast"
>tfw he actually brought it
>mfw i take a handful and chew it thoroughly and everyone's looking
>say Mmmm


Another time, english class, also middle school
>thought saying someone's a jew is funny
>make fun of this girl's big nose
>teacher keeps saying it's unfunny and that i'll be sent to principals
>i say that It's a free country and I will call out jews
>get sent to principals
>didint't go
>>
>>34235319
Well done, anoncap
>>
>>34238139
>>Think "I haven't said anything in a while, i should ask a question"
who the fuck thinks like this
>>
>>34237851
Did you shart anon? Dick out or something?
>>
>>34243773
I can die a happy man now knowing that I wasn't the only one, thank you.
>>
>>34243921
Mind you, i was emphasising on "proffessional assasin", not just any assasin.
>>
>>34235256

here are a few stories of mine

>3rd grade
>everyone speaks english and german
>new kid in class
>he can't speak either of the two
>he gets confused when the teacher asks him questions in english, does not understand a word
>starts crying
>break out in laughter, everyone looking
>disgusted, shocked looks from everyone
>say it's not about him
>?

other time in third grade
>break a pencil in half and try and flush it down the toilet
>some dick saw it and told the teacher
>teacher makes me go to the toilet, she tells me to take it out
>one piece is still floating, take it out throw it in a bin
>i think the dick and other people came to the toilet as well

third grade again
>a young girl gets raped and killed in a park near our school or something along that line, everyone was talking about it
>we talk about it in class, i open my mouth
>"now there's one less person on the world"
>teacher asks what i said
>the same dick that told on me for the pencil interrupts me
>"he said that she deserved to die"
>teacher is pissed

the list goes on, no wonder noone spoke to me
>>
>>34238377
Duriel did literally nothing wrong and you know it.
>>
>>34235503
>being in the same classes as Mexicans and niggers
Apply yourself.
>>
>>34235256
One time someone threw a calculator at the back of my head in math class.
I got up said "who the fuck threw this I'll fucking kill you.". I got suspended.
>>
>>34243530
I dont know, thinking back she did have a really big nose.
>>
>>34241857
Lol why? and was your foot odour really that bad after just one weekend?
>>
>>34237024
Im dying at that commando roll anon
>>
>>34235256
>6th grade
>PE
>I had really bad anger issues when I was younger and people really liked messing with me because of that
>This one kid (call him bird) really liked triggering me
>one day I had enough
>bird was teasing me as usual
>triggeredoverload.jpg
>"I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU"
>chase him around the gym
>of course I was a pudgy kid and bird was on track so I couldn't catch up
>two morbidly obese kids blocked me from going any further
>all the kids were laughing at me
>the teachers were just watching in awe at how pathetic I was
>>
>Just about started middle school
>Only kid from a certain part of town, school took a lot of kids from loads of places.
>Have to sit on my own a lot at at lunch and break
>Never really made any friends, occasionally teased because I was a pudgy kid.
>Can't get to school one day because I missed the bus and the driver didnt slow down and just drove off.
>Eventually are using my phone to see if my mom can take me I decide to walk.
>Nearly at school and a big burley kid decideds to beat me up. So I tell the principle but I couldnt remember it at the time. But now I do.
>And his name is the first letter of every line.
>>
>>34235372
unoriginal buddy >:^( heres another (you) though
>>
>>34235403
was it at least a roastie girl? if it was one of the nice girls I hate you
>>
File: Costanza.png (984KB, 1166x849px)
Costanza.png
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>>34243658
> I say that I would kill a bunch of people
>>
When I was in middle school, I liked a girl so I pretended someone wrote a love letter and dropped it in class. Then I read the letter and laughed at this loser (who was myself). I thought I was being clever but looking back I realize everyone saw through that shit. To make matters worse, the girl approached me and said someone saw me pull the letter from my binder. I even spritzed it with perfume. I've never told this story until now because the unbridled spergery of it is just too much to bear. I want to die every time I think about it.
>>
>>34235256
>Be me
>Around 14
>Turn in some kind of text document for the whole class to see
>had included a :3 in there
>Teacher tells me its wrong , and that you shouldnt use such things in serious business
>autism kicks in
>Make some retarded argument whole trying to make the face myself
>Teacher ends up talking about (((that))) for 15 minutes while i just awkwardly stay there
>Tfw everyone stayed silent
>Tfw never mentioned again
>Tfw never had any friends
>>
>>34237127
Don't listen to these faggots anon
It's fucking hilarious
>>
In fourth grade I would try to attract the attention of my crush by burping in her ear. Often, mind you.

It didn't work out
>>
>>34246072
In fourth grade I would pick my nose and run after girls trying to rub it on them because I thought it was funny how they screamed and ran away. Apparently this was fourth-grade me's idea of a fun game.
>>
>>34242210
Seen the vid. That was fucking gold. I thought you were a girl at first.
>>
>6/7 years old
>dad gave me talk about lockerrooms
>we're all men, just move along, etc.
>next day pull down pants in school bathroom during my class's bathroom break and jump around with my penis out
>one kid tells teacher and I deny
surprisingly no consequences I can remember besides the horrible memory
>>
>>34242210
What happened after that? Did the nigger beat you up next day? Or did you change the school
>>
These kids were sitting at a bench me and my two friends had been sitting at all year, so to get them to move I remembered i had a bone from some roadkill i found the other night in my bag (i used to get skulls, vertebrae etc and clean them and collect them) that was wrapped in a rag and i asked them to smell it. They were swaggy little dorks and freaked out when they smelled it, then i unwrapped it and explained to them what it was and they all got up and walked away really freaked out.

Also i used to smoke cigarettes RIGHT as i left the front door and over to the bikeracks to get my shit and everyone thought i was fucking crazy.
>>
File: image.jpg (781KB, 2824x2721px) Image search: [Google]
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Oh boi here we go
>senior year
>in economics class taught by a baseball/football coach that was almost a fatherly figure to me
>after a sleep-deprived night of browsing 4chinz, I can barely stay conscious in the early morning class
>coach is talking about increasing sale rates or some shit
>"...and as demand goes up, so does quantity! Isn't that right anon?!!"
"Yee"
>"so if demand increases for hats, what will happen to quantity, huh?!!"
"...increase?"
>"HOLY SHIT THATS RIGHT ANON! What does it do?"
"Increase..."
>"I SAID, what does it do-"
>lose my shit in current sleepless state and achieve max tard
"IT INCREASES, SIR!"
>"say again, anon?"
>class can't decide whether to laugh at my outburst or just stay quiet and watch
"I SAID IT INCREASES SIR!!"
>coach is just having too much
>"but is that right???"
>cheeky bastard
"SIR YES SIR!"
>"good"
>coach continues on with lesson
>class is traumatized by my autistic sleep deprived screeching
>they all look at me like I killed someone
>go to sleep without further disruptions
>feels(goodorbad?)man
>>
>>34235598
>rub my nads

Why?
>>
>>34237024
>commando roll

Kekd hard
>>
>>34237024
>do a fucking commando roll
>come up with a finger gun pointing forward
>"I'm anon"
Dude you're hilarious, sound like a guy I'd hang out with.
>>
>senior year of hs
>finally download snapchat to "fit in"
>the girl i like adds me back because we're sort of friends
>no idea what to snap her
>in econ class we had a sub and teacher didn't leave a plan so we were free to do whatever
>kid in front of me pulls out a full dvd player with a tv (like the kind people would take on long car rides to keep their kids busy)
>this kid obviously isn't the sharpest tool in the shed
>leather jacket, sunglasses inside, etc.
>starts watching Robots
>the fucking movie from 2005
>fucking 2005 with Robin Williams Robots
>see this as my golden opporunity
>pull out my phone and open up snapchat
>frame the picture perfectly because i was an edgy kid who took one photography class
>take the picture
>my flash is still on
>spaghetti everywhere
>the sub looks me dead in the eye and just shakes his head

This shit still haunts me
>>
>>34235358
I remember doing this in elementary once and someone asked why I smelled funny.
>>
>>34247213
>tfw i was in college when this happened
>>
>eating lunch in 1st grade
>a literally retarded kid comes up to me
>starts making grunting sounds
>look back at him and make a really loud grunting sound back
>kids at my table start laughing
>one kid gets mad and tells the teacher
>no recess all week :(
>>
>teacher has us self mark
>asks us to read off scores
>i'm near the bottom of the alphabetical list
>i've got the lowest mark
>ree before my name can be called
>run out of the class
>go home

social anxiety is one hell of a drug
>>
>>34242300
>Is Jew by itself an offensive word?
Immunized against all threats, etc.
>>
>>34245396
ur a cheeky lil cunt but i believe it
>>
the one and only time i was that kid trying to be cool and different

>sitting in class
>usually score some doritos and cup noodles at lunch
>thought it would be a good idea to eat doritos out of the bag with chopsticks in class
>some kid said i looked retarded and that i should stop
>>
>>34243790
>tfw teachers dock you a grade letter for only learning everything the class is supposed to teach you without causing trouble, when you should have been "participating" instead
>>
>>34241096

I dont get it original just in case
>>
>>34235256
>>34235256
>teacher doing roll call in the morning 4th grade
>finally he says my name
>didnt say here, or present
>"Chicken Nuggets!"
>everyone is silent
>teach mumbles something and continues
>didnt try to be funny ever again
>>
File: angry_pepe.jpg (65KB, 900x900px) Image search: [Google]
angry_pepe.jpg
65KB, 900x900px
I'd hate to relive this but...

>be me 6th grade
>max autism levels
>barely took showers and shit diet
>in math class doing some shit with beads
>yawn.png
>suddenly release gas from the aft end
>whole class laughs as well as the group of normies at my table
>they've been mostly okay with me before but a switch flips and they start calling me a faggot
>say that they're gonna do some shit to me in science class
>this triggers me and I go into a nerd rage
>REEEEEEEE
>I swipe the beads across the table yell "I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE"
>start to sob as teacher escorts me out of the classroom
>end up staying in the counselors office for the rest of the day
>and that's the story of how I became the weird kid who nobody talked to in middle school and was sensitive to farts
>>
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534ty.png
217KB, 598x257px
>>34241857
I find it had to believe your smelly feet would be that bad after just two days.
>>
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4KB, 225x224px
>confess my feelings to my english teacher
>write her long ass cringe letters every day
REEEEEE FIUDSHFKHJAAAAAAAAHHH someone killme
WHY DID I DO THIS
WHY
>>
>talking about how Asians think white people look the same and vice versa in a group
>"so white people think Asians look the same and Asians think white people all look the same"
>people tell me to shut up
> wuut fucking sjws
> continued talking anyways cause fuck them
>"so really facial structure is all in the mind and white people"
>teacher comes over giving me concerned looks
>"anon stop"
>"but what am I doing I'm not being racist"
>as it turns out I have been spending too much time on pol cause every time I thought I was saying 'white people' I was saying "my people"
>so they all thought I was a white supremacist for the rest of school
>>
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>>34236905
Interesting video, but I thought the poles were also very harshly treated and starved and murdered. Like 2 million of them died. It's not like life for the poles was all sunshine and rainbows while the Jews were suffering.
>>
>>34246550
fucking kek'd
you did good anon
>>
>in German 2 class in high school
>we are learning about the Holocaust
>watch particularly tragic video
>somber silence from the class immediately after the video
>in that silence, blurt out loud enough for the whole class to hear, practically yelling
>"Do gay people enjoy colonoscopies?"
>my question was never answered
>>
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This was not that long ago
>Sitting in class
>stacys and chads are hanging out in the back like usual
>drawing in my notebook, cats, dogs, flowers ect
>one of the stacys comes over and grabs it ,looks it over
>"anon why the fuck are you drawing animals, these don't even look good"
>lose my fucking shit
>grab the notebook and repeatedly hit her with it
>everyone gangs up on me and i get "owned" as they call it
>they still make fun of me
>>
>>34248601
If they have stockholm syndrome, yes
>>
>high school
>some bullshit standardized test
>writing prompt of "if you could go back in time and live as any historical figure, who would you be?"
>write some edgelord thing about how i'd be stalin and rule the soviet union with my iron fist
>fortunately it was just a written test, so i wasn't exposed to any ridicule for it
>>
>>34235358
I once shat myself a bit and didn't know what to do about it
>>
>>34235294
I occasionally see a dude on my college campus walking around with a trenchcoat and a large bag of frosted animal cookies. Autistic but cute.
>>
>>34236905
>some scene where some nazis throw a guy in a wheelchair outside the house
I kek 7x harder because you failed to mention they were several stories up
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