A magic genie has granted you one wish

>>34208567
To fix /r9k/

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Pic is my wish

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>>34208577
THIS
DUBS CONFIRM
PRAISE CAW
MAKE /R9K/ GREAT AGAIN

Restore Christianity to it's former glory as the only religion for civilized people.

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To make men value virginity again, thus shaming all sluts and non virgins to suicide and making the world monogamous again.

This would literally fix all our problems, lads

>>34208567
I wish society worshipped me.

Boom, easymode activated.

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>>34208580
Commies get out REEEEEEEE

>this post is original, commies are trying to mute me

>>34208567
Society now realises that Hitler was always right.

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>>34208567
I wish for the sudden end of all life on earth.

I know it's edgy, but it's the only way.

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>>34208714
>he made the virgin wish

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Someone who will love me unconditonally

>>34208567
I wish for everyone to be at least as intelligent and empathetic as I am. Even if I'm not really as smart as I think I am, at least we'll all be on the same page.

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>>34208567
All women in society after they become 16 they start to gain weight at a rate of 10 pounds a day until they reach a random rate between 700 and 400 pounds. They can't lose this weight and there are no health problems that come from it.

Small dicks will be more desirable than big dicks

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>>34208908
*random weight des

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>>34208567
Pic related.

Totally original comment, etc.

>>34208567
Instead of men lusting after women in droves and putting women on a pedestal, it's the other way around

>>34208567
Mandatory military service for at least 2 years that could be started at the age of 16

>>34208567
People greet each other like dogs.

For example; instead of shaking hands with your new big breasted manager, the two of you spend the next five minutes or so deeply inhaling each other's assholes.

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>>34208771
Das it mane

Das it

>it's another "anon cuddles his pillow and pretends it's his imaginary gf to fall asleep

All girls now have a feminine penis

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>>34209124
pic related my dude

Enough with the gay shit

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I wish technology advances to the point that in western society I don't have to work to live extremely comfortably and even extravagantly

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>>34208908
I agree with what he said. Good wish

Human society goes to instant extinction.

Society all of a sudden goes into overdrive and prioritizes making anime real

In a few years I will be living with mai waifu in a comfy cabin

Women have been replaced with Anime Robots.

>>34208597
No it wouldn't. 90% of women would die. We'd have absolutely no chance of getting a gf. All the leftover virgins would still go to chad.

Men and women all start to love unconditionally

>>34208567
I either wish for role reversal of the sexual market, or for a change in the birth rates so more women are born than men, or for everybody to have a superpower.

Any of those would likely greatly improve my life. I don't care if society as a whole gets worse.

All men other than myself are transformed into qt fae catboi traps.

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Citizenship is granted only if you meet an IQ threshold

Non-citizens are deported, jailed, or killed

Who knew utopia was just a click away

>>34210581
If the threshold is too high then we have a population problem. And IQ isn't a good indicator of usefulness.

>>34210581
Why not just wish for everyone's iq to be increased?

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>>34210449
Think of it as a sort of martyrdom.

All the women who are currently married and have a family would be accepted. All the girls younger than16 or so, most of whom are virgins, would learn very fast from the people that are in their 20s most of which are garbage and would kill themselves. In a few generations, we would all be saved from Roastiedom.

I would, of course, die alone, but my sacrifice would save all the others.

They wouldn't go to chad, because then they would be cast off after he picks one

Society finds a near-infinite source of free, clean energy. Instant post-scarcity, NEETbux for anyone who wants them

>>34208567
No more single parents.

>>34208567
Everyone's a kitten and we have some sort of socialist-anarchist society

Alternatively everyone is whatever that one Pink ball thing from that one video game franchise is and the same rule applies

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>>34208567
Pick realatadado

>>34210669
>near infinite
Why not just make it infinite?

>>34210651
But the world could easily go back to shit. You fix it for one generation that isn't even your own, and take down all other men with you? Thats annoying.

>>34210695
Kirby? That hyper god? We'd all be indestructible babies with the strength of 10,000,000 people and the ability to move at lightspeed.

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>>34208567
I wish everyone's physical appearance was directly linked with their individual merit and personality, based on whatever (admittedly arbitrary) scale I create. As to what constitutes a 'good' or 'bad' trait, the bad traits would be selfishness, greed, cruelty, over aggression, malice, laziness etc. The good ones would of course be willpower, discipline, patience, self-improvement, mastery of skills, so on.

The result (in theory) would be such that the most talented people, those who hone their skills and create/contribute to humanity would be the best looking. Those who are mindless consumers, criminals, or generally poor in personality would have an appearance to match.

Unfortunately, there would likely be no good looking girls left on earth.

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>>34210724
>Young girls that are getting married with their monogamous partners
>It works out well, they are happy
>they have children and teach them their ways
>their children remember the great suicide wave of a few decades ago

It would make a lasting effect

everyone turns into various furries but predation is still illegal

>>34210717
Because that could cause some problems with reality

Everyone's mother dies in their sleep tonight

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Girls behave and think more like guys

That's literally it

We would be saved

>>34210809
I wish that this anon's wish doesn't come true

To be the best DOTA 2 player the world has ever seen

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I don't know, universal basic income?

>>34210717
Thermodynamics
really? unoriginal apparently

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>>34210884
What the fuck is thermodynamics and what does it have to do with roasties and universal basic income?

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All liberals would be deported

>>34211234
Thermal Expansion

Oreganoorangeami

>>34211302
I still have absolutely no clue what that is

who else /borderlineretard/ here?

>>34209405
But Anon, the God of Eternal Economical Growth hungers and his army of slaves must keep worshiping him for ~40 years of their life while His (((priests))) make sure they have enough to stay alive

>>34208567
I'd wish that all blacks had .5" penises and autism

>>34211500
robots can grow the economy instead (real robots not virgin robots)

>>34208567
Fat men are the ideal male beauty standard.

>>34211535
Or kill us all because if they're intelligent enough to make the economy grow on their own they probably wouldn't enjoy working for a bunch of lazy humans

all black and arab immigration to the west is now in the form of socially, culturally, physically and sexually dominant amazons who hate western women and love western men

>>34211624
just because something is intelligent like a human doesn't mean that it has the same drives and values as a human, you would design them to follow orders

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>>34208580
fuck off commie

>ask to get infinite whishes
>wish granted
>rule the world kike style

>>34210833

Rofl rtz fuck off

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>>34208567
>I wish to live in a society where I have infinite wishes

On a serious note though, I wish for the beta uprising

>>34211567
Fuck off, you'll ruin any chances us skeletons have

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I wish I had the power to fill anything with anything. That was I could just fill my room with money.
I'd never need to work my shitty retail job again, I could live as I like and never have to worry about where I'm going.

>>34212799
>filling your enemies brains with depression

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>>34213209
>Going for something obvious
>Not filling their bloodstream with anvils
Think outside the box Anon

>>34213251
I'd love to see somebody try to explain that in the news

>>34212799
>accidentally aim wrong
>fill the universe with anime figurines and everything collapses into a infinitely large black hole
but on the bright side physicists would have a field day with that event, if they weren't all killed

>>34208592
THIS.
Vive la revolution.

>>34208597
>implying universal monogamy would get you laid

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Societal standards return to how they were in the 50s

>>34208567
I would make myself the king

>>34208567
i want normies to pay reparations for robots

>>34208567
I wish everyone adopted an evidence-based point of view on everything.

>>34210581
Mean IQ (which is always 100) is determined by observing the population. If you have an IQ of 120 and you deport everyone that has an IQ of <90, then your IQ effectively becomes the IQ of a retard, because you shifted the whole bell-curve to one side.
>Do you even stats, bro.

>>34208567
Replicators exist.

Nothing else.

All social problems solved over night.

>>34214694
same but with me

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Well aligned chakras for all

My personality becomes the one people likes the most

>>34215089
Do you mind if I save that picture you attached?

Droit du seigneur for me alone with all the women in the world.

>>34215231
Not at all. Go ahead

>>34208567

I wish society would give me $1 trillion dollars in high performing hedge fund investments.

All men who reach the age of 16 and aren't over 5'10 are forced into taking hormones.

Enjoying boysluts become a popular pastime of real men.

>>34215871

>5' 10"

Why only midgets? Why not make the cutoff average male height, about 6' 4"?