What's keeping you from killing yourself this time, anon?

>>34192222
A mix of hope and masochism.

I'm alive exclusively for fleeting moments of pleasure.

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becoming a daddy and marrying another daddy to live out my fantasies

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There is still a fair bit to go before I hit rock bottom.

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>>34192253
>tfw can't even go gay because small dick

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>>34192222
Those repeating digits.
Check mine.

>>34192222
My dad killed himself a while ago, I promised him i'd finish uni. After that i'll meet him in valhalla or whatever there is as a graduated man, will probably lifestream it in 3 years.

>>34192253
hnnnggggggggggggggg~

this please.

I had sex 5 times last night.

>>34192222
family, i just cant do this to them

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>>34192222
Wew my dude

At least we have each other, right lads?

People at my church would be very upset :(

>>34192222
I failed too many times, mate.
2 boxes of benzos and vodka? didn't do it
crash the car at 120km/h? nothing
fuck it

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>>34192222
the fact that i am trying to better myself but if that does not work i have a hang mans noose in my backpack ready to use so i can basically string myself up from anywhere at any moment if needed honestly.

Honestly not a lot, i mean, the soonest I can do it is probably about this time next week. Wages come through in three days and the helium will take a while to be delivered.

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I love him.


oregano

Still some shade of hope that the true reality is yet to be revealed...

>>34192222
I was planning on killing myself on my 21st birthday but my 21st birthday was a year ago and my life has gotten significantly better since then so that's why I haven't done it.

i have to study for this exam. maybe afterwards ill kill myself. im really close. there is nothing for me in this world. i have realised that now

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my dog would be wondering where ive went

once hes gone i will be too, only a year or two at the most.

>>34193703
cute dog. did you ever fondle its genitals?

>>34193876
Yes. Every night before I go to sleep

>>34192222
The will to see the world destroying itself.

>>34193876

fondled yer mas

I need to live so my mom wont get sad.

>this time

>>34193528
>him
fucking queer get off my board

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>>34194530
>fucking queer get off my board
If it's any consolidation, he was born female and just looks a bit androgynous is all. No hormones (yet?) or surgery (yet???)

I waited it out. When I initially gave in to the suicidal thoughts at 15, the belt slipped and the thud woke my family up. They kept a real close eye on me for the next few years, and the thoughts slowly went away and I stopped caring about killing myself on top of everything else. My general apathy used to be paired with thoughts that would randomly echo through my head, such as "I should just fucking end myself, I want to die", just cliche stuff like that going though my head randomly throughout the day. Now, those thoughts are entirely gone from what I can tell, and my apathy is only increasing. I don't even care about radical political ideologies anymore, and I need to force myself to care about philosophy most of the time. It isn't a fun feel, it just isn't much of a feel at all.

the end.
I will not give up until I get the end I want.

>>34194179

This and vidya

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I lack the motivation to go through with killing myself.

There's barely enough energy in my body to eat or shower.

>>34192222
I don't know.


I want to die but I'm scared and I have a dumb shred of hope that things will magically get better like life is an anime even though I know no one cares.

I hate everything.

>>34194618
my apathy has gotten worse over time too anon

i don't enjoy anything anymore

everything feels like a chore

how do i make it go away ?

>>34195333
Do you have hobbies? What do you enjoy (or what causes smiles) the most in your "life"?

>>34194565
>he was born female
She. She was born female. She IS female.
Stop faggot-enabling.

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Im fat as fuck and live with my parents so if I kms and they see the body, it will just be a fat fukin face with pimples and a shitty neckbeard with my fukin man titties out and shit

>tfw recently started losing weight just to fucking kill myself

>>34195410
>Do you have hobbies?
no

I have stuff I could do as a hobby but I think about it and realize I wouldn't do it or follow through with it so it's sort of pointless in getting started. I just really don't enjoy anything.

>What do you enjoy (or what causes smiles) the most in your "life"?

anime and reading, but i don't really read anymore I just browse 4chan and most of the time I can't get up the effort to download anime and watch it

Parents need retirement money

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I want to see if the world ends before I do.

Too much of a pussy
Living through spite
This world does confuse me
Only drinking vodka and sprite

>>34192222
Plans and hopes for the future that things will change, but as time goes on those hopes and plans are slowly becoming just futile and empty dreams. I used to get upset and sad but now I just feel empty. Every day is the same and it will never change. Some people just aren't meant to live and I am one of them.

Scared of dying and there being nothing
Also, college and masturbation keep me busy