Confession Thread. Where is your life at?

>>34083558
>Confession Thread.
Confess what anon?

File: bigjohn[1].jpg (27KB, 652x489px) Image search: [Google]

27KB, 652x489px

>>34083558
In the shitter.

I frequently think about killing a lot of people.

Shitty but not terribly awful, I take solace in the fact that even if I was going to college right now I'd still be poor.

I really hope I can learn how to focus on completing tasks within the next couple of months so I can finally finish learning shit and complete a project.

I lie to myself. I have horrible anxiety of who I am and being thought of as a loser or weird. I wrote a lot more but it got deleted when I posted it. I can identify that I am lying to myself, but I probably won't stop. It is irrational problem. I am not the confident, healthy, or likeable person I tell myself that I am. I have a severe problem of letting people into who I am because I am emotionless or scared to have emotions because people will find out I'm a loser.

File: 3cAvsON.jpg (136KB, 625x702px) Image search: [Google]

136KB, 625x702px

Everything is alright but I'm feeling pretty fucking anxious about it all falling apart real soon. I just got over my oneitis about half a year ago and things have been great. I don't have any girl to ruin my life and fill my mind with nothing but thoughts of her and killing myself, I can focus on myself and my pursuits. At least, that's how it was. I met this girl in my comm 102 class last week and I like her. I don't like her enough to do anything about but I can feel the feelings starting to churn again and I'm fucking terrified. I'm terrified that if I fall for this girl I'll just end up being the selfish, miserable creep I was not too long ago. I've just started to find some semblance of myself again and it's being threatened to be ripped away from me. I don't want to be in that dark place again bros. I have an accelerated course that ends in two weeks and she's my partner the whole time.

She's out of my league, she's a devout Mormon, and she's super athletic. I'm an unattractive manlet who's an atheist and lazy as hell. I'm almost certain we're incompatible but she seems to like me a bit as an acquaintance. I don't know whether to take the shot and deal with the almost inevitable disappointment or cross my fingers and hope I don't fall for her in the next two weeks.