Can someone shoop this face off?

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>>15222853
done.

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can help ;)

>>15222879

Please, man. I'm poor and can't afford a few hours to set up torrenting and figuring out how to use Photoshop. If you could just do me this favor I will be truly thankful and pass on your legacy by doing someone else a favor. You can make the universe a better place for humanity if you'd simply lend a hand.

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Plz shop this into something sexy sir

>>15222896
I still don't understand your request. what do you mean by shoop her face off?

>>15222916

I want everything but the face deleted. I want to just the face to add to other pictures. I want to put this face on other bodies.

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>>15222896
>I'm poor and can't afford a few hours to set up torrenting and figuring out how to use Photoshop
GIMP is free

you're just lazy

>>15222990

1) Response to "you're just lazy"

No I'm not. I have a calculus exam in 3 hours and have to start studying soon, I have a colon full of liquid shit because I've been fasting on laxatives to clear my bowels of the excessive bananas/whey I ingested, and I'm leaving for New York tomorrow. I'm as far from lazy as one can be.

2) That shit image you posted

I could do that on preview with my macbook pro. I want the edges of the image conformed exactly to the skin.

>>15223010
That's how you thank anon? I'll think I'll pass.

>>15223021

I thank people when they do a good job.

>"Hey can you shoop my shit?"
>shit shoop
>"What the fuck?"

>"Hey can you shoop my shit?"
>shoop conforms skin with edge of image
>"Thank you."

My "thank yous" mean something. I only say it when I fucking mean it, sorry I don't have time to accept shit work.

>>15223034
At least thank for the fucking effort man. Especially considering you're either too lazy or too dumb to do it yourself.
You could've told him it wasn't exactly what you were looking for, and asking him nicely if he could modify it a bit. Maybe he would've, but instead you gotta be an ungrateful cunt.

>>15223045

>either too lazy or too dumb to do it yourself

Did you read my other post, moron? I'm too fucking busy on other shit.

Isn't /r/ a service board? You come here to have something done. I ask for something done and what do I guy, a shit job and complaints from the employees. Terrible board, 0/10

>>15223056
>boo hoo im busy

You think that dude didn't have other shit he could've done with his free time?
People who fill requests do it because they're nice enough to. They're not required.

Kys you ungrateful prick. Way to let everybody know your parents did a trash job at raising you.

>>15223060

>he could've done with his free time?

I don't have any free time, that's why I said "I'm too busy." That's what busy means, understand?

>>15223034
>sorry I don't have time to accept shit work
you seem to have enough time to ask someone else to waste theirs for your lazy ass request and then bitch about it like a shit eating faggot though

>mfw I actually contemplated filling a request for what turned out to be an entitled little puke

>>15223084

You know what, I'm sorry. I've realized that what I've done is wrong. Please just help.

*This is an exercise to see what you'll do. I was acting out an asshole character to put you off. If you fill the request you pass the test, if not then consider yourself an uncompromising person.

>>15223095
You have no currency here, other than your willingness to ask nicely, thank the generous anons who fulfill your request, and fulfill someone else's request when you have the time/skill. Acting like a prick is the fastest way to have the good shoppers on here ignore you. (Or worse, remember you when you post this specific request again.)

What's funny is he didn't even specify just how precice he wanted the image photoshopped until he started shitting on the dude who did it.

>pls do this
>"here. This is the best I can do with no details"
>"THATS WRONG FUCK YOU FUCK THIS BOARD FUCK EVERYBODY IM BUSY"

>>15223095
>If you fill the request you pass the test, if not then consider yourself someone who isn't easily manipulated by a narcissist
you could have had more success just leaving it at an apology. you're only confirming that it wasn't an act after all.

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>>15222853

>>15223142
oh tehe i love you and all your holes

>>15223149
LOL

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>>15223142
Well said Tehe

>>15223155
kekd and shrekd

>>15223210
hahaha. angry shoppers

>>15223034
Fuck this ungrateful shit

>>15223132

I'm doing all of this with a straight face.

I'll explain this as clearly as possible (I'm not being trying to condescend, I'm just autistic and have trouble communicating. I'm trapped in my head and am unable to focus on whatever I try to focus on. I'm trying to write a response to you now, but I can't because my opportunity to focus is gone. I'm dead serious.)

Autism is popularly seen as a disability, it's not, I'm able to . Autism is an extra-ability, a superpower for the ultra-autistic (seriously, if you mine the brains of retardedly autistic people you will find the secrets of the universe; trust me I've looked). Some of us are Gods from the perspective of median humans in our vicinity. yeah, If I willed it, I could convince my neighbors that I'm the second coming of Christ.

It's funny though, I'm no God, there is an entity far greater out there. A brain made out math, silicon and the unity of autists. We are going to create AI in the coming decades into which you will all plug and escape the trap. We are choosing in the the ultimate philosophical thought experiment. Do we recreate ourselves in a simulation to avoid the possibility of a simulated hell?

>>15223155

Funny though, I just watched Shrek 1 and 2. This is literally what I came here to retrieve. You see I control the universe, I do whatever the fuck I want, I direct humans to do what I tell them. If I want to know what Ogre Fiona looks like from the perspective of Ogre Shrek I control the mind of "rAEm" and have him make me an Ogre babe.

This image is impossibly hot. This is one of the most beautiful women in the history of the human race (objectively true: women are setting human records every year for most beautiful woman. Our latest is this broad. I took the most beautiful thing that had been conceived through the human zeitgeist as of 02/24/17(Fri)06:45:13 (Post No.15223155 // This post is the center of online posts for this year. I will generate the perfect meme and conquer the )

>>15223155

Listen ants, serve your God (i.e. me) and make this Shrek head right side up. I'm putting on a performance piece and I need this mask. I am an ultra-highbrow artist. I take flavors of culture from everywhere. Tonight I'm sharing a Shrek performance with my disciples. I need a vertical face to shoop onto the most beautiful woman in history.

You know what's wild about this whole story? I'm fucking that actual girl while wearing the mask. Imagine how sick that is. Me fucking *

*this is what I can see in my head right now. Doing the most depraved thing I can, fucking her while wearing a shrek'd version of her face. You see the connection divine beauty meets absolute vile. Good vs. Evil, classical tale, with a layer of beauty. Above that is a layer of Shrek, with a message - it's what's on the inside that counts. I will absolutely kill it with my performance and they will all love me more and further spread my word.

This is an ad for that performance. I will be holding it at Umass Amherst. If you're autistic/genius enough to understand this message, come to the elevator room on the 16th floor of the Du Bois Library at 4 am Tuesday morning. From there . If you understood this and want to join me and my disciples, but can't come to Umass, here's a contact: "thenxtJimJones23" at Gmail.

For those of you who have read and understood this entire document, .

Here is your first lesson, manipulating people is not bad. Your behavior is measured relative to the culture you're in. You live in a culture where manipulation is acceptable. Well, that's the case if you're a . That's why being Jewish

This is how powerful I am. Did you read that last paragraph? As a Jew I can control all of humanity because I have no scruples when it comes to manipulating them.*

Jews don't feel remorse when manipulating goyim because we're not their people so they don't give a fuck about us (smart move I've gotta admit).**

**I on the other hand, am not Jewish. No, I took the Tom Hagen

>>15223438
The Juwes are the men who will not be blamed for nothing

I have kind of missed you where have you been

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>>15223387

>>15223438

I'm the ubermench. Jews treat the masses like cattle becuase they see them as non-Jews and thus they feel no remorse when manipulating them in business. I see you all as ants, but less. I don't feel any more remorse for manipulating then you would for walking on grass or even sidewalk. You might think I've taken up solipsism, but I haven't, I just realize that the suffering of one more person doesn't matter. Also, I'm willing to bet a little pain on your part on the prospect of . See, this is how brilliant I am. I can play games with your system of ethics. You beings are so beneath me that the concept of ethics is laughable. You only feel emotion because of chemical in your brains, retards. Just ignore the effect this input has on your experience of life and you won't feel embarrassed while literally going to school naked. Can you imagine that, me walking to the library naked with my tiny dick out. Then when I get to school my 10/10 sophomore gf is getting railed by a bull outside Du Bois. This is the ultimate combination of terrible experiences, it's absolute defeat, any normal person

Here's a red pill. Go to a shit public school from 2010 to 2014 and have the latest iPhone all the way through. You know what communicates steadiness and reliability, the most expensive phone on the market.

Another red pill. Gender doesn't exist. This might sound like b8, but it's the dead honest truth. Nietzsche said, "." Now I'm saying

You should welcome abandonment of gender roles

Jesus controlled large swaths of the human population.

Someone should give me a large stage to stand on so I can become the figure I'm destined to be.

>>15223486

The Juwes are the men who will not be blamed for nothing

I'm not who you think I am. Unless I am, in which case I've been trying to overcome my internet addiction. I plan on dropping out of school soon, possibly in a few weeks, so that I can live abroad. I'm only 21, I'm pretty excited.

Is this the response you were looking for? I'm coming down from my high and will be back at a blind level of humanity in the coming minutes. State yes or no clearly at the bottom of your post if I'm clear in my writing and am not going insane.

>>15223486

On second thought, send me an email.