Cowboy Quest

Shoot self in true mark of freedom

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>>7188
Shoot the Universe to make the only truly free decision a man can ever make

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>>7205
You have shot yourself in the true mark of freedom, now you are a ghost in the ghostly wild west.

>>7222
(My internet has gone out so now I am using my phone) you shoot the universe, the universe no longer exists, luckily for you, you continue to exist in the sheer nothingness since you are a ghost with unlimited potential

>>7264
sweet, my internet's back. To your surprise, in the chaos of absolute nonexistence, you notice that a new universe is beginning to develop, with entirely different physical limitations

Possess animal in new universe

Make an apple pie from scratch

>>7276

Have sex with the new universe

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>>7276
This is the new universe

>>7291

Give it the dick.

>>7297
>>7282
>>7285
>>7286
You possess an animal in the new universe, it dies almost immediately though. From the animal's corpse, apples spilled out and you made a delicious apple pie from scratch. You begin to have sex with the universe afterwards. The slow tender motion of new worlds and bountiful energy brings you to a climax so intense and powerful you almost forget that you are a ghost. Your ghost semen spills onto the apple pie you previously fashioned, but somehow, it's still all right.

Suddenly, the universe begins shift in its space across 2 dimensions and a second universe appears inside of it. You have successfully fathered a universe. What do you name it?

>>7338
multiversity, after grant morrison

>>7338
This is a dumb story. Give us pics you cunt

>>7362
This is my number

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>>7358
>>7351
You are a proud father. You named your child Multiversity after Grant Morrison. You can also finally look upon your beautiful newborn now that light has returned to the universe and visuals once again exist. Unfortunately for you, your child, Multiversity fucking dies. The universe you once gave passionate love to has also filed for a divorce. (The drawing here is an old picture of you and her back when the passion was still real)

>>7386
Summon the spirit of Batman and become the night.

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>>7393
You have successfully summoned the spirit of Batman and become the literal night. After doing so, the universe you once loved disintegrated since night is just a concept perpetuated by existing on a planet and you have broken the laws of physics, even in this new universe. You are once again alone.

>>7406
And you said"let there be light!

>>7406
>>7523
Make some cash too
FIAT BUX!

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>>7523
"And you said"Let there be light!" You are no longer the night, you are the Day! Your sunlight illuminates the surrounding nothingness, revealing that it wasn't nothingness at all!

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>>7551
The entire land is literally made of money, go nuts.

>>7612
If the land is made of money we have no place to plant crops, search for dirt

>>7637
>>7612
Second.

>>7612
spend the money on lottery tickets until we find some dirt.

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>>7637
The entire land is money, you search for dirt but to no avail until you spot a Home Depot on the horizon, maybe they sell dirt?

>>7710
yeah they should have some guardening supplies go there

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>>7690
You continue to spend money on lottery tickets, digging deeper and deeper into the ground. You keep winning though, and the land develops mountains of cash where you were previously digging for dirt

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>>7723
You do indeed spot some gardening supplies in the Home Depot

>>7761
yeah we're going to need a lot of them with all the farming we're going to be doing.

See if a home depot work will him deliver them all

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>>7768
They delivered all of the tools in the store right to you! Among these tools include 200 Trowel, 100 bags of dirt, 600 packets of unidentified seeds, and 12 small potted plants.

>>7808
alright get to farming, we want this established before the seasons change

>>7808
Examine the potted plants, are there any flowers on them?

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>>7813
You begin farming, there is so much money that it doesnt matter that you have to farm on top of the money. You never tire since at this point you are practically immortal. Right when you finish planting all of the seeds, it begins to rain as luck would have it. You are soaking wet but you are satisfied that your life is finally starting to come together

>>7871
sit down and wait.

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>>7853
You examine the potted plants to discover that there are flowers on the plants!

>>7898
Remove the potted plants to get dirt. Bury seeds in dirt. Leave 6 potted plants left.

>>7912
there are literally 100 bags of dirt from home depot

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>>7893
You sit down on the cash-infested land ground and wait patiently as your crops take in the rain. You can almost feel them growing, as if they are an extension of yourself. Perhaps they are. You are Day after all and you provide the sunlight required to grow these crops.

>>7943
Harvest the crops when it becomes time. The actual edible parts eat and sell, grind the rest of the plant into dirt to get more dirt

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>>7912
You remove the potted plants to get the dirt, but you have already buried all of the seeds in the 100 bags of dirt from home depot, it was worth it though to kill your boredom. Not that you get bored anymore, you exist outside of time and perceive every moment simultaneously. You leave 6 potted plants intact.

>>7976
we need to multiply this dirt and sell it to hungry farmers. We don't accept money though, only favors

>>7976
create another omnipotent being, opposite to yourself

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>>7956
Being that you perceive every moment simultaneously, you decide to concentrate on the exact moment when the crops have finished growing and all of your hard work has finally payed off. Unfortunately for you, the unidentified seeds you planted are money trees (that must have been where all the money came from). You grind up the plant into more dirt but you cannot eat money... or can you?

>>8021
hmm money trees. and it's illegal to burn money

>>8021
eat the money and absorb the concept of value that the money carries, thereby becoming the god of wealth.

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>>8006
By multiplying the dirt for hungry farmers, you have managed to gain a bit of a network in terms of favors. you provide the dirt, and farmers provide insight into this land. Our first bit of insight: "Don't Underestimate Us"

>>8011
You are Day so when you create an opposite omnipotent being, it follows that this being should be Night, correct? Actually the being you create resembles a small impossible geometric shape that appears to phase in and out of existence before darting directly into your mouth.

>>8026
Money Trees line the horizon, you realize that you are not the first person to make the mistakes that you have made.

>>8079
Underestimate the farmers right away.
What do they know, they're a bunch of peasants.

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>>8072
You eat the money in an attempt to absorb the concept of value that the money carries, but you made one small miscalculation: the money is so plentiful that it is worthless and to absorb the concept of value that the money carries would mean to make yourself worthless, you abruptly spit it out before you eat too much but you have still slightly devalued yourself in some way, you are not sure which way though.

>>8101
well it's illegal to burn money or shred it but not illegal to eat it.

Use our favors to make all the famers eat as much money as they can

>>8101
Oh no... I've become a PROSTITUTE THAT SELLS HIMSELF OFF TO PEOPLE FOR DIRT.

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>>8089
Even with the helpful insight the farmers provided, you still manage to fuck up. You underestimate them. You fucking idiot. Jesus Christ. The farmers begin to realize what you have done and slowly, one by one, open their mouths and bellow in a discordant unison. A wind picks up. You feel money begin to fly from the ground around you. Something is happening. The ground peels away, layer by layer of dollar bills tearing past you. Each successive layer is older and soggy and maybe a bit moldy. The money flies over the horizon, nowhere to be seen, and before you is a giant pit where once was land, at the bottom of the pit is a small cellar door. The farmers, still bellowing, prod you down the slope towards the hatch.

>>8144
"hey man! You owe me a solid! I'm not going to forget this!"

>>8116
It's too late for peaceful negotiations, you have angered them

>>8133
Perhaps you have, you have no idea what lies beyond that cellar door.

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>>8162
You plead with them, threaten them, but they ignore every word, they just continue to push you down the money hill towards the cellar door which has now, on its own, opened itself, a wooden staircase leading down into pitch blackness.

>>8204
Have sex with the niggers in the basement

>>8204
do we still have our sun hat?

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>>8217
You're not sure whether there are niggers in the basement or not, but you decide to cautiously go down anyway. Since you are Day, you illuminate the pitch blackness and reveal that there are no niggers in the basement to have sex with, at least not in this room. There are doors on three walls of the dank wooden basement. The farmers have abandoned and shut the cellar door above you. You are alone in the basement. The door on the West Wall has a small porthole on it. The door on the North Wall is nothing particularly special, just a regular door. The door on the East Wall is slightly ajar, with cobwebs branching between the door and the doorframe

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>>8227
Yes, you still have the sun hat

>>8266
cobweb door

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>>8292
You open the cobweb door and see before you... another land, made entirely of money. No Home Depot, but there is a K-Mart as well as a Public Access Beach.

>>8312
oh well fuck kmart let's look at the other doors

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>>8328
You look inside both of the other doors. The North Door contains a vault filled with various coins. The West Door leads to a shady shop with a keeper, who appears to have died at least 50 Earth Years ago and is entirely decomposed, leaving just a spooky skeleton.

>>8376
talk to the skeleton

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>>8395
At first you attempt to talk to the skeleton, but then you realize that it is dead and cannot speak. Just as you give up on your skeletal conversation, the omnipotent geometric figure that you created and subsequently swallowed earlier emerges from your body and possesses the skeleton. It places its limbs on the counter in an attempt to appear casual but the limbs end up just falling off. The skeleton manages to appear dejected even though it has no facial muscles or even any face at all with which to appear to be anything.

>>8451
kick that skeletons ass, take that omnipotent geometric enemy!