Dr. Waffle's Perfect Breakfast

>>697122
>Call Frank

That motherfucker owes us. He knows why

>>697122
>Call your pal Frank from the Pentagon

>>697122
>>Call your pal Frank from the Pentagon

op ded

nutha ded quest
ded ded ded ded ded

>>697383
Naw fuck that. There's a new OP in town, as long as his spotty mobile data holds up.

---

Frank! Of course! The man owes you a sympathetic ear and more, after all you've done for him.

Unfortunately, you value your privacy and do not own a phone. You've just about bankrupted yourself, in fact, your one remaining asset being half a banana that was too mushy to continue making bananas Foster from. But it will serve, oh yes.

Breakfast will be served.

>Banana phone! Use it as the speaker. Frank won't hear you, but he'll know who it is.
>Banana phone! Use it as the reciever. You can't hear the other end, so you'll just have to guess.
>Other

---

Sorry, my turn to drive! I'll signal if I'm alive in an hour and a half.

>>697616
So this is a simplex banana phone?
> Use cell fruit as mic
> talk at him then say if wants to talk at you, call you back. But it better be good, like million dollar loan good.
> Use cell fruit as speaker

>>697649
https://youtu.be/dIiZ3vvZ78s

You hold the mushy banana to your mouth and let your mad---independent science do the rest. The peel fairly buzzes with purpose.

You spend the first twenty seconds or so repeating "Franklin, it's Waffles. You're going to listen to what I have to say." Once you figure he's picked up, you get down to business. "I need a loan. My resources are running low. My work must continue."

---

At a rehearsal, will try to find breaks. Sorry! Any one else feel free to jump in.

>>698070
The banana cannot bear your genius for long. You estimate it has a minute and a half before it's useless.

>Remind him of what he owes you for (write in)
>Lay out some demands
>Hang up. He'll call.
>Other

>>698257
He owes you for shipping him some sweet seduction breakfasts to keep his dick wet. Which is hire he slept his way to his current position.

>>698266
"I don't suppose you've put Suite 1342 at The Donatello on your list of credentials. You get one pitch, and it better be good."

You keep the banana in hand, ready to accept the call. All around you is fresh reminder of your failure.

>Misinvestment: You're facing scarcity, plain and simple. The expensive things you still have aren't enough to go on.
>Disaster: You've made a mess. Who knows what you'll be able to salvage...
>Epiphany: You came to a realization that made a shambles of everything you thought you'd ever accomplished.
>Write-in

---

Will continue at 2 PM PST. Anyone's welcome to hijack, though.

>>698834
>Write-in

After calling an alternate reality food critic I began to doubt the nature of cooking, after that I set out on a food pilgrimage to reach egglightenment. Now I am left with the knowledge but without the proper funds.

>>700450
This all could have been avoided if not for that fateful day in the supermarket when you used the whole banana stand to boost your signal. That transcendant minute. That conversation with the exalted. That trip to the sherrif's office.

Reminiscing must wait. You're grateful for being uplifted from what would have been an unfulfilling scientific life, but you must admit that what you know to be the true path has put you in difficult circumstances.

You're in the airport parking lot. Oktoberfest is a week and an ocean away. All you have is a mushy banana, your labcoat, and your mission.

>What do you do?

>>700644
Bite your thumb and use the food truck summoning jutsu

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>>700758
That's the dumbest idea you've had in weeks!

It's true that you occasionally use your intuition instead of close examination and deduction in your studies, but the thought of empirically unprovable methods such as jutsu is anathema to you. If any mechanism can one rely on to simply conjure food existed, you wouldn't be in this situation. But... things are a little desperate, and you might settle for some processed food.

>Do you?
>Don't you?

>>700880
Did you seriously just ask anon whether to do something stupid our not? I think you know the answer to that question.

>>700892
My intent was different, but true. Working.

File: DUMB.png (8KB, 446x589px)

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UUUUGH. How did you even come to consider this?

This was unavoidable. Both your hands are coated with mush of sweet banana flesh and bitter peel. No. Stringent. Stringent peel. Oh, the irony, that the bitter is so easily ignored by the casual eater who discards the peel, while you, who seeks to touch the sublime, find the sweet to be short-lived lie that poorly deflects the disgust you duly assign to the mess on your hands.

Those funky banana strands, though, where do they even fit into all of this? They taste like basically nothing, and their origins are obscure. You didn't notice any just now.

cont.

File: desolation.png (23KB, 446x589px) Image search: [Google]

23KB, 446x589px

>>701018
You've accomplished nothing, by the way. The parking lot stretches around you. You still have work to do.

>Head to the airport proper.
>Face your failures in you "lab".
>Wait, did you just leverage the occult to procure processed food?

Can't promise speedy updates after 6 PM PST, but I'll be watching.

>>697122
http://imgur.com/a/i5lnr#0

Helping a friend, but watching still. Anyone gets in here, I'll have an epilogue by evening.

You headed back to your "lab", simply a lair you'd made in an RV parked here while the owners were abroad. Giving up on Oktoberfest, you eventually managed to hotwire the RV and scrounge some valuables for a pawnshop, earning you enough start up a traveling foodcart.

Your journey led you around the country. The products of your early, inferior breakfast studies paid your bills, but you found true kindred spirits in surprising places. Discoveries came slowly, subtly, but you never forgot your purpose.

It became quite clear the Frank was ignoring your calls, but you had friends and obligations. He rose ever higher, aided, you were sure, by some unknown chef, and a conspiracy against you that would have made his power unassailable.

From the struggle emerged your finest work, and a terrible choice to make.

But perhaps another time.

---

And that'll be that. Thanks to all who brought this goofy thing as far as it went.

>>708820
Woo, true ending Get.