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Medieval Adventure Q
Medieval Adventure Quest (Part 1) 2016-05-05 18:50:04 Post No. 67010
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Medieval Adventure Quest (Part 1) 2016-05-05 18:50:04 Post No. 67010
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In this medieval adventure, you control a young farmboy with a thirst for discovery and 50 gold pieces he stole from his bitch mom. Farmboy can do anything he wants within the realm of fantasy physics except kill himself because farmboy is a very devout jew. The year is 1100 AD or something and magic and dragons and shit exist. Go crazy.
What do you do first
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Kidnap virgins
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>>67010
Buy a staff and light armor.
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You walk through the nearby woods and come across a glade. In the glade is a pool where two young qt virgins are playing and laughing. However the pool is guarded by a large man with a sword! What do you do
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>>67051
Kamehameha the guard
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Somehow you learn the kamehameha wave technique and attack the guard, however you are weak and the wave only makes him kind of cross.
(Roll a 5 and Ill give you the staff and armor)
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Rolled 5 (1d6)
>>67097
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Whatever
So you actually picked up some sweet leather armor and a tree branch earlier but the guard is still very much in a bad mood and hes coming at you with his sword, although he is a little wounded. Fight or fly? Or a third option? Theres qt virgins to kidnap.
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>>67163
Kamehameha again
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>>67163
Rape them
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>>67163
Point above him and say 'Holy shit, a defunct like/dislike bar!'
While he is distracted, smack him upside the head with the tree branch to demonstrate the importance of wearing a helmet.
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>>67528
This
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>>67163
Poison the wells. You are a very devout jew in the middle ages after all.
Thread posts: 13
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Thread images: 4