European Dragon Quest 28

>What? I was only joking about the whole not owning slaves part. (Lie)

>>578901
>But what happens if the slaves revolt?

>...Yeah. Sorry. I don't choose to own slaves

Let's not make Revenaris into a slaver or lie this early on.

Going to wait twenty more minutes

Rolled 1 (1d3)

Rolling

1=lie
2=slaves revolt you know
3=yeah, no

"What? Of course I have slaves!"

"Ah. "

"...Why don't we talk about something else?

Roll me a 1d20+4 to see if she believes you. Samefagging allowed.

Rolled 9 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>579152

Rolled 3 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>579152

Rolled 6 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>579152
How much can one man samefag?

The world may never know.

>>579152
>>579157
>>579162
>>579161
>I'm sorry for lying. I just thought you'd think lesser of me for not having slaves.

9+4=13
Failure

"Besides, my slaves do... Slavey things all the time!"

"Slavey things?"

"...Yeah?"

"What the fuck are slavey things?" She she seems entertained, to an extent.

Actions

>Try to make a joke about slavery?
>Are you insinuating I don't own slaves?
>You know... Act like slaves?
>Erh, I never had slaves.
>Write In

>>579173
>>Erh, I never had slaves.
Lying on a date is pretty bad. Trying to keep that lie going is worse.

"...I uh, never had slaves."

"That's too bad."

"Erh, yeah."

"So..."

The two of you awkwardly sit around.

Actions

>So, what research are you doing?
>I have no idea what to talk about.
>You look... Good.
>How do you know my dad?
>Let's go out!
>I have no idea what to talk about.
>Write In

>>579189
>>You look... Good.
>>How do you know my dad?

>>579189
>I have no idea what to talk about.
>Write In
"Want to go out and do something; get a meal, see a film, maybe go to a park?"

"You uh, look good."

"Thanks?"

"So uh, how do you know my father?"

"...Well, that's going to be an awkward question. He captured me, and spared my life. He tried to make me one of his consorts, once."

"Goddamn it... My dad's projecting on me, isn't he?"

"That's what I would assume."

Actions.

>...That asshole!
>I'll be back...
>...Well, maybe dad will hang out with me more if I court you?
>...I'm just going now. Sorry.
>Goddamn it, he's gone too far! I'm going to speak to him about this!
>Write In

>>579235
>Write In
"It might not be that... but I'll still go and ask him, be back soon!"

>>579248
This. Glad to see you're back, anon.
You were the guy doing all the write-ins last thread, right?

"It might not be that... but I'll still go and ask him, be back soon!"

She nods her head and excuse yourself, and you can't help but feel a little pissed off.

You are currently Renexixious, and are currently walking to your lair`s telephone.

"Dad!" You hear behind you. You see your son rushing up to you.

"Huh? Revenaris?"

"Dad. Why the hell are you telling me to date someone you tried to tumble with!"

You nearly said that you already did...

Actions

>Oh. Sorry about that.
>That was in the past, Rev.
>Pheromones?
>Come on, please hust court her.
>Write in

>>579261
Aye, that's me.


>>579317
>Oh. Sorry about that.
>That was in the past, Rev.

>>579337
This.

"Oh. Well, sorry. But that's in the past, Rev."

"Dad, I'm not going to date someone you were interested in."

"What, are you afraid I'll try to tumble her behind your back?"

"...Why didn't you mention this?"

Actions

>If you won't, then she's mine.
>...Don't disappoint me, Rev.
>I didn't think it was important.
>I just want some grandchildren, alright?
>write in

>>579401
>I didn't think it was important.
>write in
"To be frank, I understand why you are uncomfortable with the idea but trust me. My intent is your happiness, and grandchildren...

Mostly your happiness though! However... if you don't want to date her you really don't need to."

>>579406
This.

"I didn't think it was important, but be frank, I understand why you are uncomfortable with the idea but trust me. My intent is your happiness, and grandchildren... Mostly your happiness though! However... if you don't want to date her you really don't need to."

He sighs slightly.

"Listen, get.someone else to do that. I already have my own interests and I don't need you to help."

Actions

>I suppose one of your brothers might be a better match.
>Listen, she's lonely, nice, and a dragon.
Do it for me, at the least.
>Good luck then, Rev. Sorry about all this.
>Write In

>>579428
>>Good luck then, Rev. Sorry about all this.

>>579428
>Good luck then, Rev. Sorry about all this.

"Good luck then, Rev. Sorry about all this."

He nods his head, and heads back to Lorraina. Probably to apologize.

[I]Not to sound weird, Ren... But I think we should still try to get them together.[I]

Actions

>Well... She's a dragon. Why don't we court her?
>We could find another son to court Lorriana.
>It's his decision, Flames.
>Write In

>>579484
>It's his decision, Flames.

>>579530
This.

It's his decision, Flames.

I know...

You return to reality, realizing you still have to contact the Chinese Minister.

Actions

>Nah... You have better things to do.
>...Maybe Victor can brief you about China?
>Sure! Let's do it!
>write in

>>579633
>Sure! Let's do it!

>>579633
>>Sure! Let's do it!
China Conquest next? World Emperor!

btw our Dragon children should just do what we tell them to do! Patriarchy, manly dragon leader!

You quickly head back to your lair and pick up your phone.

"Hello?"

"Ah... You must be the Swedish Emperor. I am Wao Ceo, Minister of the Chinese Empire. I am sorry we could not meet in person." A wizened, and old voice says.

Actions

>You chinks are next on my conquest agenda, you know.
>Why can't we talk in person?
>I am pleased to meet you.
>Why am I not speaking to the Emperor?
>Write In

>>579739
>I am pleased to meet you.

>>579739
>>I am pleased to meet you.
"Where are you now? I will meet you in person."

Rawr. You're next, muahaha! Fear me! Just thinking, not saying aloud... yet!

>>579739
>Chinese Empire
Haven't read the whole archive: Do we have interests in China or existing trading agreements? Anything we don't want to destroy?

>>579739
He's probably hiding in a bunker somewhere, fearing that meeting us would mean him getting eaten, maybe?

So few players around at Europe times, seems to only fill up when the people across the pond are awake...

"Ah. Nice to meet you."

"Indeed, dragon. I have a request from the Chinese people, however."

"What?"

"Our brothers in Japan are slowly but surely being annexed by the Americans... China would offer it's eternal thanks if you can denounce the American Imperialism."

Actions

>Sorry, but no.
>I want more then just thanks.
>I suppose I can...
>Are you not aware of my son being the president?!
>Why do you want to stop Japan from being annexed?
>Write In

>>579816
>>Are you not aware of my son being the president?!
"I can offer my protection over the Chinese Empire, if you're concerned over American interests spilling over to more areas."

Protectorate get?

>>579816
The Chinese probably wanted to annex Japan themselves, Americans were faster :).

>>579816
>Are you not aware of my son being the president?!
>Write In
"Look, me and my son aren't on the best of terms, he's warned me not to get involved in american affairs and to be frank that is his right.

However I can protect you and... possibly attempt to seize some of japan, keeping it free of the Americans for now..."

"Are you not aware the president is indeed, my son?"

"I am sorry if I have offended, but the Emperor wishes for a peaceful resolution."


"I can offer my protection over the Chinese Empire, if you're concerned over American interests spilling over to more areas."

"China can protect its own interests, Dragon. The Emperor in his eternal wisdom is a peaceful man, and he would enjoy it tremendously if you agree. And we simply need political pressure to get the Americans to back down."

Actions

>Sorry, no.
>Go drop dead, chink.
>If that's all it is...
>I want more.
>...I don't think you understand, Minister.
>write in

>>579870
>write in
"Look, I can't think of a realistic explanation of why I would do this that doesn't stop me doing some of my future plans or make no sense. If you want I can ask him to stop or slow his efforts but not much more is possible."


That reminds me, at the beginning of this quest NATO was a thing, does it still exist? Considering we destroyed the major threat they united against (communism).

>>579870
Supporting this >>579879

"Look, I can't think of a realistic explanation of why I would do this that doesn't stop me doing some of my future plans or make no sense. If you want I can ask him to stop or slow his efforts but not much more is possible."

You hear yelling in the background. Not really yelling per say, but a very loud voice.

"Erh, I am sorry for using your time. The Emperor says he will deal with it himself."

Actions

>What does that mean?
>...Erh, right. Well, let's discuss something...
>Hang up.
>write in

>>579906
>>...Erh, right. Well, let's discuss something...
"Let's start university exchange programs to increase cultural understanding."
And get additional concubines... rawr.
Fighting against America? His funeral. Maybe our son contacts us again on more friendly terms then...

>>579906
>write in
"Why do I get the feeling this is going to end in war, nuking, death and chaos. Why does everything always end in death and chaos."

"Let's start university exchange programs to increase cultural understanding. Why not, Wao?"

"...Our people do not need your western ideas."

"...Come on, please?"

"I will present your plea to the Emperor, but I can already tell you it won't gain traction."

Actions

>...Fine, I suppose.
>My nation is fascist, yours not far from it. You won't get any degenerative ideas.
>Merely a plea?
>Write In

>>579946
>...Fine, I suppose.

>>579946
"I expect a good result. We're all friends."
Do we have to do king stuff? Like looking over the shoulder of our burocrats?

>>579946
We should also tell our American President son about our talk with the Chinese, just a friendly heads-up.

"Come on, we're all friends here."

"There are no friends in politics."

"Erh..."

"Unless you have another offer, my time is up."

Actions.

>Hang up.
>Well... I have a deal for you
>Come on, please?
>Write In

>>580022
>>Well... I have a deal for you.
I will send troops to Japan to ensure America does not acquire more territory there, and I will contact him in an attempt to prevent further aggressions.
In exchange, I want that university exchange program.

>>580022
>Write In
"I was wondering if you would like to combine our military industrial complexes for a project. I wish to enhance my military power by designing a man-carried anti-armour rocket. Would your nation be willing to join in the creation of such a weapon or any other such weapons?"

"I will send troops to Japan to ensure America does not acquire more territory there, and I will contact him in an attempt to prevent further aggressions.
In exchange, I want that university exchange program."

"...You have a deal. The Emperor thanks you. Is there anything else?"

"I was wondering if you would like to combine our military industrial complexes for a project. I wish to enhance my military power by designing a man-carried anti-armour rocket. Would your nation be willing to join in the creation of such a weapon or any other such weapons?"

"I believe he will be amiable to this. Thank you for your time."

The phone hangs up, and for a little while you start calling up army leaders to send a small detachment to China.

After a little while, the phone rings again. Apparently this time from Spain

Actions

>Answer it!
>Erh, no.
>Write In

>>580098
>>Answer it!
Friends from Spain! "How's the weather?"

>>580098
>Answer it!

You pick up the phone, and hear Franco.

"Ah, Friend! You have my thanks for encouraging your wife to relax a little!"

Actions

>You owe me one, Franco.
>It's the least I could do for a friend.
>Since when did we becomw friends?
>...Just wondering, how would you like to be a part of my country?
>I didn't do it for you. I'd rather my wife not invade you for your colonies and get Great Britain bigger then it already is.
>Write In

>>580131
>Write In
"Trust me, I don't mind seeing as you are quite helpful in staying out my way. So long as you two reach a amicable agreement I won't have to get too involved.

Speaking of which what have you settled on? Peacefully co-existing, selling some of the colonies or something else?"

"Trust me, I don't mind seeing as you are quite helpful in staying out my way. So long as you two reach a amicable agreement I won't have to get too involved.
Speaking of which what have you settled on? Peacefully co-existing, selling some of the colonies or something else?"

"Nothing just yet, but she is less aggressive in our talks."

"Ah. That's good."

"Of course it is, now I can bring water in without it freezing solid!"

"Right..."

"Anyways, the... King, wants me to send along his offical thanks. He can attend the meetings now without being terrified."

"Erh, why?"

"Your wife kept coming as a dragon. So I had to do most of the negotiations myself, which I was planning to do anyways."

Actions

>Well, why don't we meet together sometime?
>...I see. Hopefully no one died of hypothermia.
>How would you like to get an agreement together?
>How's Spain going for you?
>I heard you and the King don't get along. Is this true?
>My son, Revenaris, is looking for a relationship. Would you have any interested women?
>Hang Up
>Write In

>>580210
>...I see. Hopefully no one died of hypothermia.
>How's Spain going for you?
>Write In
"I do apologise for my wife's lack of tact when it comes to diplomacy; she always seems to skip the carrot and go for the stick so to speak..."

"I do apologise for my wife's lack of tact when it comes to diplomacy; she always seems to skip the carrot and go for the stick so to speak.."

"It's fine, Ren."

"Just wondering, did anyone die from hypothermia?"

"No, luckily enough."

"So, how's Spain going?"

"It's... Well, it's hard. The clergy hates you and the King would rather just make the damned kingdom a democracy."

Actions

>Clergy hates me? Why?
>Sucks for you, Franco.
>You should get a new king.
>That's why dragon rulers are the best.
>Write In

>>580357
>Write In
"I can understand the clergy hating me considering all the shit I've done... I am still their god dammed leader so no worries there..."

"I can understand the clergy hating me considering all the shit I've done... I am still their god dammed leader so no worries there..."

"Well, they're considering breaking away."

You can't help but sigh.

Actions

>You won't mind if I send some soldiers over to oppress them, right?
>Well, if that's what they want...
>Absolutely heretical!
>write in

>>580400
>>write in
Alright try talking to them and if that doesn't work send them to me.

"Alright try talking to them and if that doesn't work send them to me."

"Erh, listen... I can't do anything. Politically if I dissuade them I've alienated the Falange and the Carlists."

Actions

>I understand.
>...If you want, let my troops cross the border. It'll make your life easier.
>Damn it, do something or I'll make you do something!
>write in

>>580486
>I understand.
>write in
"Since I understand I'll deal with them, separately. Lovely talking with you!"

"Since I understand I'll deal with them, separately. Lovely talking with you!"

"Yeah. I'll see you around."

You hang up the phone. Anything else you want to do?

Actions

>Call someone else!
>Maybe you should call the ruler of Persia? You think Flames would like the heat.
>Eh, go to bed.
>You should deal with an issue... Like that newspaper or something.
>Write In
>
>write in

>>580619
>Eh, go to bed.

You go to bed...

Anons, you have upgraded!

>Stable Mutation
>Unstable Mutation
>Ultra Unstable Mutation
>Upgrade Mutation

>>580639
>Unstable Mutation

Anon, roll me a 1d100. First roll only

>>580657
I forget if you roll or if I roll...


Also, what year is it in game?

Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>580685
I've not rolled in sometime, forgive me.

It's ninteen fifty.

You got the mutation, Acidic Blood. It's not enough to melt through metal, but can melt through flesh, wood, and weak stone. This only works in dragon form and limitedly in half dragon form.

You wake up a little tired, and you... You feel a little weaker. (Lose one Body)

It seems Chrysoula and Frankizka are sleeping beside you.

Actions

>...You know, why don't you wake up Frankizka?
>You have a job to do today.. And that's to stop those issues.
>Petition day. You haven't done that in a while.
>Maybe you should change a law or something?
>Write In

You.wake up a little.g

>>580814
>Petition day. You haven't done that in a while.


After that

>Maybe you should change a law or something?

>>580849
This.

You decide to do some petitions today... You have a very, very long list.

The first comes before you. He seems to be a human male, and bows before you.

"Mighty dragon Emperor... I have come before you asking for something."

"Rise."

The man gets up from the ground.

"I come from the province of Uppsala. I would petition that the government should have a little less... Control, over our daily lives."

Actions.

>...Why? I'm curious.
>...Guards, get him out of here.
>...No. Not at all.
>...How exactly does the government control your day to day life?
>You sound like a traitor. Guards! Arrest this man!
>...I suppose I can try to lower the government's power.
>Write-In

>>581008
>Why? I'm curious.

>>581008
>...How exactly does the government control your day to day life?

>>581008
>...How exactly does the government control your day to day life?

"How exactly does the government control your day to day life?"

"Well, I'm a manager of a factory. Or was. Back a year or two ago, when you nationalized most foreign businesses, I was out of a job. Then, once I got enough money from doing some work around Uppsala, I decided to buy a small store and it's growing quite well."

"And?"

"If I grow too fast, my store could get nationalized. All the work I did by my hands, stolen by the government!"

"...I wouldn't say stolen. But continue."

"Not to mention that the damned bureaucracy makes it impossible to get anything done. It's just too large!"

"What are you trying to get?"

"I'm trying to get a sidearm's permit, and I've been waiting nearly a year and a half, and it's STILL not even close to verified!"

"That just sounds like bureaucracy."

"Bureacracy that's part of the government."

"...But why exactly do you want it gone?"

"I want to run my store and my private life without being possibly scrutinized, and I want my taxes to go to something useful, rather then just feeding the government behemoth."

Actions.

>...I can assure you, that your tax dollars are well at work.
>...This is just a case of severe government bureaucracy.
>I didn't know the bureacracy was that bad.
>You have nothing to fear as long as you follow the church and are a loyalist.
>...I nationalized those factories to give to honest, hardworking Swedes.
>Write-In

>>581112
>I didn't know the bureacracy was that bad.

>>581112
>Write-In
Okay here is what I'll do;


From here on out, I'll set out trying to reduce the bureaucratic nature of our government, within reason. For now I'll just grant you the permit to solve the problem for you, okay?

Two, I'll try to keep workers and such on if I perform nationalisations in future. I don't plan on much more nationalisation, more so reinvesting my current funds into businesses and or buying them out before handing them over to the government to be ran in my name.

As to reduction of the government behemoth, I'll see about some efficiency improvements here and there. Perhaps a modernisation of the taxation system.

"Okay, here's what I'm willing to do. I'll try to reduce the bureaucratic nature of our government, within reason. For now I'll just grant you to the permit to solve the problem for you, okay?"

"Thank you, my lord."

"No problem. Number two, I'll try to keep workers and such on if I perform nationalizations in the future. I don't plan on much more, but rather reinvesting my current funds into businesses and buying them out before handing them over to the government. And to reduce the government behemoth, I'll see about getting some efficiency in there. Maybe a modernization of the taxation system."

"You are too kind my lord. Thank you!"

"Next!"

The petitioner leaves, and the next petitioner seems to be a yuan-ti. A male one, at that. He slithers up to your throne and bows.

"My lord."

"What is it?"

"As you know, Oslo is the homeland of the Yuan Ti. Our numbers have grown significantly, and the human numbers dwindled."

"...Ah."

"I would ask you, where are the humans going?"

"I'm not sure?"

"Well... I am a scholar on the faith of the Yuan Ti before we embraced Catholicism... And I fear I know the answer."

"What is it?"

"...Well, back in the old days, the faith of the Yuan Ti was essentially demon worship. One particular ritual was the transformation of a human to a Yuan Ti."

"...Hm..."

"Now, I think the cult of Merrshaulk is back. Or worse."

"...Worse?"

"There are empty houses in Oslo, homes where no one goes into, even as crowded as it is in Oslo. They are marked with a strange black star, and there is reports at night of chanting in them."

Actions.

>...So what your saying is that the primary way more Yuan Ti are added is through a cult?
>...Fuck... I moved the Yuan Ti throughout the empire, as well.
>...Where the fuck is Adelmann?
>...Thank you, scholar.
>...How large are these cults?
>Why haven't I heard of this sooner?
>Write-In

>>581207
>...Thank you, scholar.
>...So what your saying is that the primary way more Yuan Ti are added is through a cult?
>...How large are these cults?
>Write-In
"Do you know if these individuals have the consent of the transformed?"


God damn it all! And here I thought we might be able to deal with our problems without death...

"How large are these cults?"

"...I wouldn't know sir. But our ancient historical texts number it from anywhere from thirty to a hundred."

"Ah. So what your saying is the primary way more Yuan Ti are added is through a cult?"

"Yes. Though there is still the traditional way of pregnancy."

"...So all Yuan Ti are basically humans?"

"Indeed they are, sir. Or at least originally human."

"Do you know if these individuals have the consent of the transformed?"

"I doubt it sir. The cult of Merrshaulk isn't a "good" cult in any sense."

"Well... Thank you, scholar."

"Indeed. I will however point out, that it is very likely that a sort of mind-control is used on the cultists. To even mention Merrshaulk's name is to bring bad luck... To worship him, I dread think of what would happen."

"I thank you, scholar."

"...That is no problem, your majesty. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a book about Yuan Ti history to write."

"I hope to see your work published one day."

The scholar nods his head, and slithers out.

...Erh, this is bad. Isn't the black star a sign of Chaos?

Actions.

>...Well... Maybe it's Khornates? Khornates might be friendly. Maybe.
>Why don't we try to infiltrate those cults? Maybe we can get them to just worship something... Less evil?
>...Fenrir, we need your help.
>Adelmann is a witch hunter, and boy oh boy do we need a witch hunter.
>Write-In

>>581338
>>...Fenrir, we need your help.
>>Adelmann is a witch hunter, and boy oh boy do we need a witch hunter.
Let's see where this goes.

>>581338
>Fenrir. Don't be the hero we deserve. Be the hero we need.
>Get adelmann too.

Fenrir, we need your help.

Huh? What's going on?

...Well, there might be Chaos Heretics living in my nation, and I need your help.

...Not to sound rude, but why do you care about what someone worships? They just sound like anarchists to me.

Actions.

>...Fenrir, Chaos isn't JUST anarchy, we're talking about tentacles in every orifice. Do you want tentacles in every orifice?
>...Is there any way we can talk to the god or whatever?
>...Listen, Fenrir... Is there any way you can help us?
>...I care because I don't want to get raped by tentacle demons.
>Write-In

>>581376
>...Fenrir, Chaos isn't JUST anarchy, we're talking about tentacles in every orifice. Do you want tentacles in every orifice?
>...I care because I don't want to get raped by tentacle demons.
>...Is there any way we can talk to the god or whatever?

>>581395
This.

Fenrir, I care because I don't want to get raped by tentacle demons, and Chaos isn't JUST anarchy, we're talking about tentacles in every orifice. Do you want tentacles in every orifice? Besides, is there any way we can talk to the god or whatever?

...Well, I can try.

A few minutes go by.

...Fuck! All I can hear are whispers! It's like they're screaming into my mind or something!

Actions.

>...Shit. Keep it together, Fenrir.
>Well, whatever it is it clearly doesn't want us to know.
>Fenrir, you alright?
>Keep trying Fenrir, I believe in you!
>...We'll do this later. I have some more petitions to go through.
>Write-In

>>581416
>...Shit. Keep it together, Fenrir.
>...We'll do this later. I have some more petitions to go through.


Time to begin operation ECCO {Emergency. Covert. Chaos. Cleansing}

>>581416
>Fenrir you alright?
>We'll do it later

We keep getting shit heaped on our pile when we have a curse we need to deal with.

>>581428
I just got a fucking retarded idea. We could unchain Fenrir and have him eat God, then maybe let him eat some distant planet?

>>581432
I thought of that a while back.
It might work.
I'm up for trying if you are.

>>581444
We should bring it up with Fenrir after the petitions.
Operation God Eater

>>581432
>>581444
Just a suggestion but could we ask god, you know, what it'd take to get him to drop the curse.

Well, let's try to finish the petitions first. I have a few ideas though, to stop this curse.

You return back to reality.

"Who's next?"

The next petitioner seems to be white, and he comes up to you and bows.

"Monsieur."

Great. He's french. And on further expectation, you see he's lycanthropic.

"Always nice to see one of your kind here. Now, rise."

He gets up off the ground.

"I come from Hansodr. Recently Orc tribes have been moving through the few farms we have, trampling the crops. We would like you to pass a law restricting the movement of Orc tribes throughout the land."

Actions.

>...They're my most zealous subjects. No.
>What exactly do the orc tribes do?
>...I'll pass a law to prevent them from traveling into farmlands and forests.
>I'd like to see a tribal orc about this, from their angle.
>I'll do better then that. I'll forcibly relocate them to the cities.
>Write-in

>>581562
>What exactly do the orc tribes do?
>Write-in
"I cam't stop them from moving about the country but could place laws into effect to stop them trespassing onto farms and such. Would that suffice?"

"What exactly do the Orc tribes do though?

"They mostly are nomadic herders, or the occasional pilgrims."

"Ah. Well, I can't stop them from moving about the coutnry but I could place laws into effect to stop them trespassing onto farms and such. Would that suffice?"

"Yes, monsieur."

You wave him out, and call for your second to last petitioner. He seems to be a elf with a goatee, and somewhat decent clothes. He is also wearing his gold star, and he bows before you.

"Great sovereign."

You sigh.
"Rise, elf."

He gets up off the ground.

"My lord, I am a hunter in the mountains, and I have come to bring a rather important topic to you."

"What is it?"

"...Well, due to the highly carnvious populace of Lycanthropes, Half-Dragons, and Yuan Ti, I am afraid the forests of Sweden are beginning to run out of wildlife... Not to mention the forest is getting smaller thanks to the heavy pollution coming from Hansodr and it's many lumberjacks."

"...Oh."

Actions.

>...Well, it's not that bad elf. Just go back home.
>Could we get them to eat something else besides meat?
>I fucking love forests... Maybe we should pass a few environmental regulations?
>The factory pollutant is fine as it is.
>Could Siberia hold farm animals for slaughter?
>Write-In

>>581681
>Could we get them to eat something else besides meat?
>I fucking love forests... Maybe we should pass a few environmental regulations?

>>581681
>Write-In
"Sustainability is a necessity of a good, logical nation. Thus the logging companies shall, from this day forward, be forced to sustainably log their purchased lands.

They will plant saplings and won't be allowed to clear cut areas. This means that they may not, by law, completely clear an area of all the trees present at any time so as to sustain the area.

As to the factory pollutants; they will be forced to comply with tighter regulations to reduce the production of acid rain producing substances and other harmful pollutants. This will also improve the health of the inhabitants of the surrounding area.

As to the problem of sustaining the hunting practices of the non-human population, let us start a government breeding program and safe areas where no one may hunt except for park rangers culling populations. This will at the very least limit the damage to be done and possibly even solve the problem."

"Sustainability is a necessity of a good, logical nation. Thus the logging companies shall, from this day forward, be forced to sustainably log their purchased lands.

They will plant saplings and won't be allowed to clear cut areas. This means that they may not, by law, completely clear an area of all the trees present at any time so as to sustain the area.

As to the factory pollutants; they will be forced to comply with tighter regulations to reduce the production of acid rain producing substances and other harmful pollutants. This will also improve the health of the inhabitants of the surrounding area.

As to the problem of sustaining the hunting practices of the non-human population, let us start a government breeding program and safe areas where no one may hunt except for park rangers culling populations. This will at the very least limit the damage to be done and possibly even solve the problem."[\red]

"That sounds reasonable, sir. Thank you."

The elf bows again and leaves. Now, the final petitionner comes in. It seems to be a half dragon with bronze scales. He bows in front of you.

"Sir, I am the city architect for Stockholm. Right now however, the architectural community is split on the use of roads and civilians. Some say we should copy the Americans, others say we should focue on pedestrian movement rather then cars. Others say it's good as it is, but could use some sort of beauty, such as planting trees and building parks. A handful want to do public transportation."

Actions

>I like cars and my limo, damn it.
>Erh, let's try pedestrian focused road design.
>I like trees and parks. Let's try a environmental approach.
>Public transportation is good, right?
>Write In

>>581884
>Write In
"I feel that an above ground use of pedestrian road design, intersected with the occasional automotive transport network, so as to allow inter-city and intra-city travel privately, is optimal. Backed, of course by a metro system linking to the surface based train network slightly outside the city.

If you can add beauty in to your designs, do so but remember a beautiful but ineffective system is a bit like a solid gold boat; looks good but god help you actually using it.

Also future proof this network for double whatever the current population density is, possibly even higher depending on if you think the city will expand in that direction and other such factors."

"I feel that an above ground use of pedestrian road design, intersected with the occasional automotive transport network, so as to allow inter-city and intra-city travel privately, is optimal. Backed, of course by a metro system linking to the surface based train network slightly outside the city.

If you can add beauty in to your designs, do so but remember a beautiful but ineffective system is a bit like a solid gold boat; looks good but god help you actually using it.

Also future proof this network for double whatever the current population density is, possibly even higher depending on if you think the city will expand in that direction and other such factors."

"That's brilliant sir! I'll send you an estimated cost tomorrow!"

He takes leave.

"Sir?" One of the guards next to you says.

"What?"

"If you may, I have a question... And a sort of concern."

Actions

>Save it for later, guard.
>Well... I have the time. Go ahead.
>Write In

>>582050
>Well... I have the time. Go ahead.

>>582050
>Well... I have the time. Go ahead.

'Well, I have the time. Go ahead."

"...You know that medicine you put out on the streets? The one that turns people into half dragons?"

"Well, yes."

"...My daughter, she's about eight... I found her taking that stuff behind my back with some of her friends. This might be a long shot, but... You wouldn't happen to have a cure for it?"

"...Why are you concerned?"

"...She's changed completely. I'm worried about her."

"How has she changed?"

"She's... Well, she stopped referring to me as father, she practically doesn't speak to me or her mother."

"That's certainly strange, but she's probably just going through her teen years."

"...Just please, if you have the cure... I need it for her."

Actions.

>Just because your kid took drugs behind your back doesn't mean I'm liable to help her.
>I'm sorry.
>...How does she react when she sees me on the television, etc?
>I'll look into it, guard.
>...How did she get that stuff?
>Write-In

>>582146
>How did she get that stuff?
>I'll look into it guard.

>>582166
This.

"How did she get into that stuff?"

The guard sighs.

"...I don't know, honestly. I'd ask her, but I don't know if that would do much."

You sigh.

"Well, I'll look into making a cure, guard."

"Really?"

"Really."

The guard hugs you.

"...Thank you, thank you so mu-. Oh uh... Sorry."

You can't help but smile.

"I understand. I'm a father after all."

The guard nods his head, and returns to his post.

So... Guys. And Fenrir.

Hey.

I think it's high time we discuss how to get rid of this curse.

Actions.

>...I have a crazy idea. Let's see if we can't unbind Fenrir!
>...Fenrir, can you put me into contact with God?
>...Fenrir, can you put me into contact with your father, Loki?
>Nevermind, this is stupid.
>Write-In

>>582146
>...How did she get that stuff?
>Write-In
"There is no specific alchemical product for reversing the process but I will be successful in synthesising such a thing. Mere child's play to making one that can turn people into dragons."

>>582255
>...Fenrir, can you put me into contact with God?


Let's work from our least insane plan down. Generally what we want from god are the following;

1) A list of things we could do to get him to leave us be, maybe not actions that'll get us all the way there in one go but general ideas and concepts.

2) A list of what we have done that has pissed him off.


From these we can then reverse or enact the needed changes.

>>582292
This. And if it's some hippy bullshit like "renounce your belief in Odin and retire to a farm", then Fenrir gets a buffet.

Patch me through to God.

Say no more man.[\b]
Hello? Renexizious?

Erh, hi.

Do you need something?

Actions

>Well, yes. I want to know about how I can stop this curse.
>I'm uh... Curious. What do you think of my lids?
>...Is Reinhold up there?
>Write In

>>582392
Phoneposting has never been worse. I meant kids, not lids.

>>582392
>>...Is Reinhold up there?

>>582392
>Is Reinhold up there?

If he didn't make it anons...

>>582439
If Reinhold isn't up there, there will be Hell to pay. In a more literal sense.

Hey, uh... I'm curious. Is Reinhold up there?

Yes, he is.[\blue]

Actions

>Can I talk to him?
>...Can you bring him back?
>...Just curious, what happens to an afterlife if a God is destroyed?
>Is he happy up there?
>Good. I need to ask about something else.
>Is he pissed at me?
>Write In

>>582485
>He made it? Great!
>I came to ask. How do I get this curse undone?

>>582485
>>...Just curious, what happens to an afterlife if a God is destroyed?
>>Is he happy up there?
>I read about the Ragnarok, and I'm concerned for those who worshipped Odin.

He made it! Thank you. And just wondering, if a God is destroyed then shat happens to their afterlife?

No problem. And to answer your question, they become unbound souls,

Now... How do I get rid of this curse?

Firstly, resign from the office of Pope, and swear that you will not take it back, directly or indirectly. Secondly, stop your little personal cult from worshipping you, and lastly do not enslave Christians, or those peaceful and honest folk who cannot defend themselves.

Actions

>So if I kill you, Reinhold can be... Well, assumingly put in my head?
>Sorry, but no.
>I can try.
>I think Fenrir is hungry...
>Write In

>>582626
>>I can try.

>>582626
>I can try

So we're abolishing slavery.

>>582626
>Sorry, but no.

>>582626
>I can try.
>Write In
"What if I got the credentials to be the pope, so to speak. What if I actually trained as a priest and all that?

Failing that, could I instead of relinquishing the position, do you another favour; like greatly improving the lives of your followers or converting, peacefully, many people?

Also, would you like any religious commandments updated or created before I leave office?


And one question, which I ask since all the gods are real and everything. Did you actually make the universe? Did any of them?"

"What if I got the credentials to be the pope, so to speak. What if I actually trained as a priest and all that?"

I'm sorry, but I don't want you anywhere near the church. I don't like the thought of a pagan, much less a dragon in charge of my faithful.

Could I instead of relinquishing the position, do you another favour; like greatly improving the lives of your followers or converting, peacefully, many people?

...No. If you were genuine in worshipping me I would consider it.

Also, would you like any religious commandments updated or created before I leave office?

Yes. Mostly that the church should not take up affairs of the state, and vice versa.

And one question, which I ask since all the gods are real and everything. Did you actually make the universe? Did any of them?"

No. But, before you go, my son has a request to make of you.

.. What?

He`d like you to calm down the whole dragon cult thing. Says that I'm beginning to look different or something.

Which one?

The one where they think your a saint or something. Oh, and Jesus forgives you of your sins, or something like that.

Actions

>So if I returned to being Catholic, I can be the pope?
>On second thought, nevermind.
>...You look different? How?
>I can do that.
>About the slavery thing... Is there any way I can keep that?
>Can I talk to Jesus?
>write in

>>584085
>write in
"Actually the reason I converted to a different religion was to try and get a different god to protect me from your curse. If you are agreeing to stop with the curse I see no reason to avoid praying to you.

However I would like it to be noted I will be doing favours for some other gods who I am close to or who provide me with rewards. I won't worship them but will trade and work with them. Sacrifices might occur for example to a certain roman god, who has promised me stability for my empire should I do so. If you have a problem with that we can discuss it now.


I will tell the cult that they can't worship me and be christian at the same time. I won't force them to change their religious beliefs or anything but merely tell them how it is.

Send my thanks to Jesus, he sounds lovely, I'll take care of the religious commandments. "

Actually the reason I converted to a different religion was to try and get a different god to protect me from your curse. If you are agreeing to stop with the curse I see no reason to avoid praying to you.
However I would like it to be noted I will be doing favours for some other gods who I am close to or who provide me with rewards. I won't worship them but will trade and work with them. Sacrifices might occur for example to a certain roman god, who has promised me stability for my empire should I do so. If you have a problem with that we can discuss it now.

I do. I don't want my rivals getting any power.

I will tell the cult that they can't worship me and be christian at the same time. I won't force them to change their religious beliefs or anything but merely tell them how it is.

Send my thanks to Jesus, he sounds lovely, I'll take care of the religious commandments. "

You return to reality. Sort of. Your still in your mind.

...Why can't you just keep being norse? It's fun! Also, you'll piss off all the norae gods converting back.

Actions

>Can you get out of my body?
>...I was lying to god. I'm remaining norse then.
>It's alright, Fenrir. We're still friends.
>We can still hang out, alright?
>Write In

>>584131
>Write In
"He said he didn't want his rivals getting more power. He doesn't want me to worship anyone but him or anything like that.

He never said however you couldn't keep staying in my head. Since, as far as I am aware, I ain't worshipping you...


As to the Norse gods, I will be honest with them and tell them how it is. They odd to understand... I mean I am planing on making a few changes that would benefit them amongst others but I could easily spin it to them that these are for their benefit."

He said he didn't want his rivals getting more power. He doesn't want me to worship anyone but him or anything like that.

He never said however you couldn't keep staying in my head. Since, as far as I am aware, I ain't worshipping you...

Last time I checked only Claw worshipped me. And that was in his past life, really.


As to the Norse gods, I will be honest with them and tell them how it is. They ought to understand... I mean I am planing on making a few changes that would benefit them amongst others but I could easily spin it to them that these are for their benefit."

So uh, do we have to get rid of slavery? I like it. I just don't like it when you go full retard and start becoming our mom.

Flames, that was a one time thing and you know it.

...Well, God did say to release the christian ones, and the civilians. It's a status thing, you know?

What, owning people?

Well, yeah. I like having lots of money, slaves, that sort of thing.

Actions.

>...Well, I suppose we can get something different in our horde rather then slaves.
>We'll just need to enslave non-Christians.
>I know what you mean. I'd rather keep slavery, personally.
>...I think it's for the best. Power does corrupt after all.
>Flames, what would Chrysoula think if she heard that?
>Write-In

>>584217
>...Well, I suppose we can get something different in our horde rather then slaves.
>Write-In
"I can think of a few ways to get replacement slaves; Serious criminals, people could pay debts by being slaves for certain lengths of time and those cultists might even be willing. Really it just depends on what we plan on doing with them.

We could turn slavery into something that genuine benefits our nation outside of saving money!"

Well, I can think of a few ways to get replacement slaves; Serious criminals, people could pay debts by being slaves and those cultists might even be willing. Really, it depends on what we plan on doing with them... Besides, we could turn slavery into something that genuinely benefits our nation outside of saving money!

I suppose that sounds good...

See? Now... I'm fucking exhausted. And I think I have to change a few laws.

You begin to get off your throne when you see a yuan-ti slave come up to you.

"Sire?"

"What is it?"

"You've got a letter from someone named Vildia."

Actions.

>...Well, I was planning on changing a law or two. But I can read this, I guess.
>...Flames, do we know a Vilida?
>How about later, alright?
>Toss the letter away, slave.
>Write-in

>>584248
>...Well, I was planning on changing a law or two. But I can read this, I guess.
>...Flames, do we know a Vilida?

Flames, do we know a Vilida?

Hang on... I think she was one of our old consorts. I think she's the mother of Viktor.

Oh...

"Sir?"

"Huh? I'll uh, read this.

You grab the letter, and sit back down into your throne, and tear it open.

The handwritting seems a little... Sloppy, but otherwise decent.

Hey. It's me. You probably don't remember me, but I certainly remember you. I'm Vilida Selmson, your old consort from two years ago. So, in case your curious of how life's been for me after you got rid of the aristocracy, it hasn't been too pleasant. Hell, the only job I actually got is as a female wrestler... And no, not that kind. We're talking about professional wrestling, not that slut shit. Hell, my coach says I could easily compete in the male wrestling world... Either way let's just say that it's a little unfair being nearly twice as a tall as the competition, and being able to breathe fire. Too bad I can't do that, or else my competition would be roasted alive. Fun fact, I haven't actually lost a single match, and I believe I put four people into a coma. So, thanks for the whole turning me into a half-dragon thing. Hell, being able to trip people with my tail and hold them down wins quite a few matches on days I don't really feel like fighting.

Anyway, times have been hard since my family's lands were stripped. I sort of went looking for revenge and got as far as the entrance of your palace until I changed my mind, mostly because I realized my son would probably have a better life with you then with me. I'm not a emperor, a true dragon, or the damned pope. Anyways, I hope you've had more luck then I had in the past two years. I'm mostly curious to what exactly happened to my son, Viktorious.
Fondest Regard, Vilida Selmson

PS: Red scales are better then white ones any day of the week, faggot.

Actions.

>Maybe you should write a letter back?
>...Flames, wasn't she the one who was way larger then any half-dragon I made? Besides Dad, of course?
>Professional wrestling? I thought that shit was fake.
>...Flames, would you be adverse to inviting her back?
>...Did she just call me a fucking faggot? I think we need to regain our honor.
>Write-In

>>584296
>...Flames, would you be adverse to inviting her back?
>Maybe you should write a letter back?

"Your son is fine, he has grown into a nice man. If you want to see him feel free to ask.

I do apologise about the whole seizing of the noble's lands, mostly did it to simplify the running of the nation.

As to your scales comment; You have a point, having red scales would be better since it would hide you bleeding when you get your ass handed to you." Or something to that effect.

You begin writing a letter back to her. It goes like this.

Your son is fine, he has grown into a nice man. If you want to see him, feel free to ask. Now, I do apologize about the whole seizing of the nobility's lands, as I mostly did it to simplify the running of the nations. As to your scales comment; you have a point. Having red scales would be better since it would hide you bleeding when you get your ass handed to you, one of these days.

There. Done. Now, Flames, would you be adverse to inviting her back?

To what? Be our concubine again?

Actions.

>Erh, no. I enjoyed her company, and maybe she could teach our kids how to wrestle?
>...If she's alright with it, I have no objections. I mean, we have an entire room for concubines that's hardly been used.
>No, I'd like to just take her to see her son.
>...I'd like to get some revenge and show her that white scales are better then red scales.
>Should we contact the other two concubines?

>>584342
>No, I'd like to just take her to see her son.
>Should we contact the other two concubines?

Erh, no. I'd like to just take her to see her son. But should we contact the other two concubines?

Jesus Ren, you keep sounding more and more kingly by the day.

Really?

Well, yeah. You don't really sound like the fun loving degenerates we were in the past.

Actions.

>...We were never degenerates. And I'm still fun loving.
>A little salty, are we?
>Well, I've matured a lot. We can't just keep drinking, tumbling, and attempting to rule the nation. I mean, it's nearly all of Europe!
>I learned my lesson to always ask for consent. Have you?
>Well, there's a time and place for that. It's called other dimensions.
>Is that a yes or a no to contacting the other two?
>Write-In

>>584366
>A little salty, are we?
>...We were never degenerates. And I'm still fun loving.
>Is that a yes or a no to contacting the other two?

A little salty, are we?

...Just a little.

Well, we were never degenerates, and last I checked I'm still fun loving.

Right...

Well, either way is that a yes or a no to contacting the other two?

Well, we could just wait for them to contact us... It's your call though.

Actions.

>I suppose we can wait.
>I'd rather send the letter.
>...Wasn't one of them the mother of Julius? I think we should at least tell them what's been going on.
>...Say, would you happen to know what Maria's been doing? She's the mother of a concubine, last I checked.
>Write-In

>>584378
>I'd rather send the letter.
>...Wasn't one of them the mother of Julius? I think we should at least tell them what's been going on.
>...Say, would you happen to know what Maria's been doing? She's the mother of a concubine, last I checked.

Say, would you happen to know what Maria's doing?

Last I checked she's still dating the Serbian "emperor". I think she moved down there with him.

Oh. Well, I'll begin writing the letters to them. But first, let's tell Julius's mother...

What will you write in your letter to Karolina?

>Hey, your son is a vampire. But he's cool.
>Just wondering, how have you been doing since I disbanded the nobility?
>How's being a half-dragon?
>Your son Julius is doing good.
>Write-In

>>584445
>Your son Julius is doing good.
>Hey, your son is a vampire. But he's cool.
>Just wondering, how have you been doing since I disbanded the nobility?


In that order.

Also what happened to all your players OP? They all died or something?

>>584448
It's early in the morning, but I think your write-ins kind of made the players just wait for you to post

So, hey. Karolina, right? Well, I just wanted to write to you that your son Julius is doing damned good. I made him the governor of Lativa and Estonia, but sadly he became a vampire. Which is cool in it's own right. And he only occasionally eats a slave or two. Anyways, how have you been doing since I disbanded the nobility? I'm curious since I haven't heard from you.

You end the letter and write the second one to Emilia.

Actions.

>Hey, your daughter Maria is doing good last time I checked. She's even courting a emperor!
>I hope your doing well, even with the whole disbanding the nobility thing.
>...You'll be pleased to hear that Maria inherited your more kind personality.
>Write-In

>>584459
>Hey, your daughter Maria is doing good last time I checked. She's even courting a emperor!
>...You'll be pleased to hear that Maria inherited your more kind personality.
>I hope your doing well, even with the whole disbanding the nobility thing.

Hey, it's me. Renexizious. Your daughter is doing good, last time I checked, as she's dating a emperor. That's gotta be worth something, right? Anyways, you'll be pleased to hear that Maria, just like you, is a kindhearted soul. And I hope your doing well, even with the whole disbanding the nobility thing.

You end the letter, and stretch... Thank god that's over.

You of course, are exhausted. So you decide that you'll take a break.

Actions.

>...Maybe you should take a trip down to Persia for a diplomatic meeting?
>You have a specific law you want to change. (Specify, Free Action)
>...Well, you feel like researching a little.
>What ever happened to finishing that internet thing?
>Maybe you should find a cure for Julius's vampirism?
>You know, maybe you should go down to the university to study some magic?
>You should spend some time with your mother.
>Ask Flames if there's anything he wants to do.
>Sleep, sleep sounds nice.
>You should see Frankizka. Why not?
>Maybe you should see one of your kids?
>You should call Elizabeth, and check on that egg!
>...You should personally go out and track down Vilida.
>Write-In

>>584549
>You have a specific law you want to change. (Specify, Free Action)

Remember that law about taxing heresy? Begin phasing that out of our government's funding by lowering the fines.

Also try to ease the bureaucratic difficulty of dealing with the government.


>You know, maybe you should go down to the university to study some magic?


>Write-In
Also send out a official government statement stating we aren't a saint and all that in regards to the cult. State they either worship us or god, not both basically.

You begin to phase out the tax of heresy out of the government, and you decide to ease the bureaucratic difficulty of dealing with the government.

Roll me a 2d20+6 to see how effective you are in easing the bureaucratic difficulty. Second dice is for your followers to see if they remain or change. Samefagging allowed.

Rolled 11, 14 = 25 (2d20)

>>584606
I'll always be here to help roll.

>>584606

Rolled 10, 15 + 6 = 31 (2d20 + 6)

>>584621
Bugger.

11+4=15

A few fringe elements go back to just worshipping God, but most remain Draconic Catholic.

15+6=20

You start a limited downsizing program and it seems to be helping quite a bit with the government's bureacracy. Meanwhile, you decide to head down to the local unniversity...

When you arrive there, you find a few classes of interest to you.

Actions. (Choose three)

>Summoning 102, Advanced Familars and Basic Summoning
>Necromancy, how to raise undead for practically years!
>Holy Magic 101, basic!
>Illusion 101!
>Draconic Magic (HALF-DRAGONS ONLY)
>Evocation and You!
>Advanced Enchantment!
>...Maybe you should take a look at the standard acdemics?
>Write-In

>>584652
>Evocation and You!
>Summoning 102
>Advanced enchantment.

>>584652
>Summoning 102, Advanced Familars and Basic Summoning
>Advanced Enchantment!
>Evocation and You!

You take a trip down to the Evocation classroom. You enter, and take a seat right by the front row. A few minutes go by and a few of the class files in. A student sits next to you, a lycanthropic male. (Who's apparently in his lycanthrope form, fur and all)

"This is the Evocation classroom, right?"

"I would presume so."

"Thanks."

He sits next to you, and you must admit, he smells terrible.

"I haven't seen you around here. Who are you?"

Actions.

>...I would ask who you are, firstly.
>Oh, you know. Renexizious.
>Fake name?
>If you continue to talk to me, I request you move. I'm not a very sociable person when I have things to learn.
>...Erh, why are you in your lycanthrope form?
>You smell terrible. Sorry to say.
>Write-In

>>584687
>I would ask who you are firstly.
>No one important. Just call me Ren.

>>584700
>...I would ask who you are, firstly.
>Oh, you know. Renexizious.

I would ask who you are, firstly."

"Name's Bastian. I'm new here."

"Ah. You can just call me Ren. I'm not important, but you might see me on the news at some time."

"Huh... Where are you from?"

"I'm from Sweden, or more specifically, up from the mountains."

"Oh. Well, I'm Danish. Nice to meet you."

"Yeah."

"Anyways, erh, thanks about not freaking out about the fact I'm a lycanthrope."

"Why would I?"

"...It's a long story. It's sort of new to me as well. But your name doesn't sound very Swedish."

Actions.

>Ah. Well, we have time. There's about fifteen point four minutes until class starts.
>There's a long story behind my name as well.
>How exactly are you new to lycanthropy?
>Mind if I ask why your coming to my un- I mean, this university?
>It's not Swedish. I'm actually a dragon. You might of heard of me.
>Write-In

>>584729
>It's not Swedish. I'm actually a dragon. You might've heard of me.

>>584729
>It's not Swedish. I'm actually a dragon. You might of heard of me.

"It's actually not Swedish. I'm actually a dragon. You might've heard of me."

"Erh, sure you are."

"What? It's true."

"You aren't one of those people who think they're a different species or some shit, right?"

Actions.

>I'm not making this up.
>...Shapeshift. It's a good way to get attention though. And probably cause people to get a little nervous.
>...Eh. I'll show you after class if you want.
>...Oh god, don't even compare me to those people.
>Why does everyone act like that's impossible?
>Heh, sure I am.
>Write-In

>>584758
>Heh sure I am(sarcasm of course)
>I'll show you after class if you want.

"Heh, sure I am." You say, with obvious sarcasm.

"...Right..."

"Well, I'll show you after class if you want."

"Erh... I guess."

"Thanks."

"So uh... Mind if I ask what class you have next?"

"Summoning 102."

"Oh. I have History after this."

"History, eh?"

"...I don't particularly like the teacher, but yeah."

"Huh. Mind if I ask why?"

He opens his mouth, and shuts it.

"...Erh, nevermind."

Actions.

>...What, is he a degenerate or something?
>Well, it's college. You don't really need to like the teacher you know.
>So, what do you think of our Lord and Savior?
>Erh, just curious... What do you think of Renexizious?
>So, how exactly is being a lycanthrope new to you?
>What are you trying to get a degree in?
>Write-In

>>584813
>Well, it's college. You don't really need to like the teacher you know.

"Well, it's college. You don't really need to like the teacher."

"Yeah..."

The teacher walks into the room, it seems to be a female human. Bastian apparently takes out his notebook, and a somewhat heavy textbook which thuds audibly through the classroom. A few students look at him.

"Hey uh, where's your notebook and textbook?"

"Huh? I remember everything just fine."

"Erh, you need one or something? I know some students can't afford the textbook. We could share."

Actions.

>Me? Too poor to afford something? Start laughing.
>Erh, thanks for the offer, but I can definitely memorize this stuff.
>...You up for a bet?
>Well, I could use that textbook... Sure, why don't we share?
>I'll take a spare notebook if you have one.
>Write-In

>>584852
>Erh, thanks for the offer, but I can definitely memorize this stuff.
>...You up for a bet?

"Thanks for the offer, but I can definitely memorize this stuff... But, are you up for a bet?"

"What are we talking about?"

Actions.

>...Oh, you just do what I say for a while. If I lose, I do what you say.
>I have a thousand marks on me. I'll bet some money.
>You owe me a beer if I win. Vice versa if you do.
>It's just a friendly competition.
>...You owe me lunch. And let's just say lunch is very, very, very large.
>You've got to skip history and come with me.
>Write-In

>>584867
>You owe me a beer if I win. And vice versa.

"You owe me a beer if I win. And vice versa."

"Heh, alright. I can get behind having a free beer."

Roll me a 1d20+6 to see how much you learn.

Rolled 12 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>584886

Rolled 1 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>584886
RNG preserve me.

Rolled 15 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>584893

Anons, use barbaric?

>Yes!
>No!

>>584904
Of course.

Roll me a 1d20 to learn barbarically.

Rolled 6 (1d20)

>>584927

Rolled 5 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>584927

Rolled 17 (1d20)

>>584927
Shameless samefagging here.

Rolled 20 (1d20)

>>584927

>>584955
>>584898
Redemption achieved.

File: image.jpg (85KB, 500x446px) Image search: [Google]

85KB, 500x446px

>>584960

Barbaric Critical Success!

You feel ANGRY as fuck. You just realized this entire lesson, all because the beginning made no sense... But now it does. You feel the pressing urge to yell to correct the teacher, so you do so.

DO IT YOU CUNT! You hear in your mind... You can't help but follow it.

"HEY YOU FUCK!"

The professor seems a little startled.

"YOUR DOING THIS SHIT WRONG YOU FUCK!"

"Erh, could y-"

You vault over the small railing in front of you, and take the chalk out of the teacher's hand.

"SIT DOWN AND TAKE NOTES WHILE I FUCKING SHOW YOU HOW IT'S DONE!"

The teacher seems a little... Scared.

"I'll call securi-"

"DO YOU WANT TO FUCKING KNOW HOW TO PROPERLY TEACH A CLASS ROOM?"

She sighs.

"Fine. Why don't you teach it then?"

Actions.

>YOUR FUCKING PUMPED! LET'S DO THIS!
>Oh... Uh. Sorry. I'll just be going back to my seat.
>FLAMES YOU'LL BE MY FUCKING TEACHER'S ASSISTANT.
>FENRIR I WANT YOU TO MAKE GODDAMNED SURE THAT EVERYONE'S PAYING ATTENTION OR SOMETHING!
>SHAPESHIFT LIKE A FUCKING MAN!
>RIP OFF YOUR FUCKING SHIRT!
>Write-In

>>585011
>Rip off your shirt.
>Shape shift like a fucking man!
>"CLASS IS IN MOTHERFUCKERS!"
>Start teaching.

You rip off your shirt, and begin shapeshifting. Your already good looking abs become even more imposing with scales, and you note that the khornate symbol is glowing. Huh.

"CLASS IS IN MOTHERFUCKERS! LET RENEXIZIOUS TEACH YOU CUNTS!"

Roll me a 1d20+4 to see if you make any sense.

Also, what form are you changing to?

>Keep it somewhat sane, Dragonblood.
>ALL TEACHERS MUST HAVE ABS! HALF-DRAGON!
>YOU NEED A FUCKING ASSISTANT! HAVE YOUR HALF-DRAGON OR DRAGON FORM HAVE A SECOND HEAD FOR FLAMES
>...FUCK SANITY! DRAGON FORM! (but small enough where you won't crush the classroom.)

>>585065
>YOU NEED A FUCKING ASSISTANT! HAVE YOUR HALF-DRAGON OR DRAGON FORM HAVE A SECOND HEAD FOR FLAMES

Half dragon

Rolled 10 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>585065
Half dragon form with a head for flames.

10+4=14

Failure!

You... You make no sense at all. You just start rambling while Flames tries to make sense to the room about what the fuck your trying to do. This is inbetween lots of flexing, bench-pressing the teacher's desk, and being MANLY AS FUCK.

"SO, ANY QUESTIONS?"

Virtually every hand in the room goes up. The teacher has long-gone out for a smoke break, and you find many female students eyeing you during your brief WORK OUT SESSIONS! And it's the sort of "oh shit he's hot" look you fucking love.

You punch the wall with tremendous force, causing a hole to appear in it.

"ANY QUESTIONS?"

No one raises their hand.

"Uh... Does anyone have any questions for me?"

The hands go back up and Flames starts answering them... A handful of students seem to be whispering amongst themselves.

"YOU FAGGOTS SHUT THE FUCK UP WITH YOUR GAY PRIDE BULLSHIT AND START STUDYING! TURN TO PAGE 4 AND I WANT YOU ALL TO FUCKING KNOW HOW TO CAST A FUCKING SHOCK BOLT IN THE NEXT THIRTY MINUTES!"

They nod their head and quickly go back to studying.

Actions.

>...You've done good. Flames is answering their legitimate questions, you can take a break now and calm down.
>...Erh, maybe you should probably get going before campus security gets down here and starts asking questions.
>This class are a bunch of fucking pussies. You need to man them up, but how?
>...Fuck, grab a piece of paper and try to make a quiz or something. Oh, and find a copier. You want to make sure people are actually learning here.
>You aren't the fucking teacher. Calm down and head back to your seat.
>Tell the class to get off their asses and try to cast the spell you taught them... Which was Shock Bolt.
>Yell that Bastian needs to get you a fucking beer and now.
>Write-In

By the way anons, you have 2 Ranks in Evocation and you can now cast Shock Bolt, which can hit up to three targets.

>>585173
>...Fuck, grab a piece of paper and try to make a quiz or something. Oh, and find a copier. You want to make sure people are actually learning here.

You grab a pencil on the teacher's desk and a piece of paper. You crudely write out questions, such as "WHAT IS THE PROPER USE OF SHOCK BOLT
A: KILLING YOURSELF
B: USING IT TO CREATE COOL AS SHIT UNDEAD CREATURES
C: FOR REASONABLE AND MUNDANE SHIT.
D: TO KEEP SLAVES IN CHECK.
E: TO ZAP BITCHES WITH LIGHTENING."

Pro-tip, C is wrong.

You leave the classroom. Flames yells for them to wait a few minutes and you begin copying out papers at a copier. Another professor seems to be waiting for you to finish.

"Will this take long?"

"Erh, it'll just be a minut-"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GIVE ME YOUR COFFEE!"

"Erh..."

"...He's a little tired."

"Ah. I understand."

He hands you his coffee, which you drink and shatter the coffee cup in your hand.

"THANKS NERD."

A few minutes go by while the copier keeps printing. Eventually it finishes, and you take the copies out of there and leave.

You kick open the door to your classroom, and drop the huge stack of papers on the desk.

"LISTEN UP YOU FAGGOTS, IF ANY OF YOU CHEAT ON THIS SHIT I WILL PERSONALLY MAKE YOU MY FUCKING HARMONICA! IS THAT UNDERSTOOD!"

The students nod their head, terrified.

"GOOD. BASTIAN, PASS THIS SHIT OUT."

He begins to pass the papers out, while you relax on the desk.

...I'm not even sure if they can read that shit.

Actions.

>THEY'LL BE FINE.
>...WE SHOULD DO THIS SHIT WAY MORE OFTEN!
>...WE SHOULD GRAB LUNCH WHILE THEY DO THIS SHIT.
>...FENRIR, HOW WELL DO YOU THINK I'M DOING!
>...I'm going to try to calm down now...
>Write-In

>>585225
>...WE SHOULD DO THIS SHIT WAY MORE OFTEN!
>...FENRIR, HOW WELL DO YOU THINK I'M DOING!
>...I'm going to try to calm down now...

You begin trying to calm down, taking deep breaths and counting to one thousand.

Erh... We should do this teaching stuff way more often. It's fun.

Oh shit, you aren't a khornate anymore!

Erh, yeah. I think inviting Khorne into my head was probably a bad idea for when I get angry.

Yeah... Well...

So uh, Fenrir. How well do you think I'm doing?

...I'm a little fucking scared, honestly.

What? Why?

...Well, uh... I haven't seen anger like that for a long time.

Actions.

>...Oh. Sorry.
>You haven't seen anything when my eyepatch is off.
>Come on, you have to admit it was pretty fun to watch.
>Have you met Khorne yet?
>You'll get used to it, Fenrir.
>Write-In

>>585256
>Come on, you have to admit it was pretty fun to watch.
>Have you met Khorne yet?

>>585256
>Come on, you have to admit it was pretty fun to watch.
>You haven't seen anything when my eyepatch is off.
>You'll get used to it, Fenrir.

Come on, you have to admit it was pretty fun to watch.

Uh, yeah. I was scared that you would try to suplex a student or two.

You can help but laugh out loud.

Nah.

So uh... Well. This not what I expected.

Yeah... Anyways, have you met Khorne yet?

Who's Khorne?

...Well, I'll tell you later.

You return to reality, and the first results come to your desk...

It seems like most of the class failed this, putting C instead of E, Zap Bitches. Bastian also failed. But since you aren't the actual teacher, you don't actually grade anyone on this. The bell rings and you could go to your next class...

Actions.

>...Erh, maybe you should talk to Bastian in passing time?
>...You are the new Evocation teacher. This is fun!
>Shapeshift back to your human form.
>Head to Summoning.
>Maybe you should just take Bastian's History class?
>Leave.
>Write-In

>>585304
>Head to Summoning.
>Shapeshift back to your human form.

You head to Summoning, shifting down back into your human form. You see Bastian purposely avoid you, and something tells you that he's probably terrified of you.

When you arrive in Summoning, you take a seat in the front row, and see the same dwarf you saw last time.

"Oi, it's my favorite student!"

"Erh, hello."

"I haven't seen ya' in a while. Weren't you the one that summoned that little dragon with the swastika on it?"

"Erh, yes."

The dwarf laughs a little.

"Ain't every day you see a flyin' lizard with a swastika."

He goes to teach the class, and he tells everyone to summon their familars.

Roll me a 1d20+3 to see if you can keep Smaug under control.

Rolled 8 + 3 (1d20 + 3)

>>585370

>>585370
So help me Odin, if I have to raise my pimp hand...

Rolled 16 + 3 (1d20 + 3)

>>585378
Goddamn dice.

16+3=19

Great Success

You summon Smaug, and the student next to you, an apparent female yuan-ti, summons her familar. Which seems to be a snake.

Smaug eyes it hungrily.

"Don't you fucking do it, I swear to God..."

The female Yuan Ti hears you talking to your familar, and she turns around.

"Are you talking to me?"

"...Smaug's just hungry."

"Oh... Could you keep him away from my snake then, please?"

"I'll try."

"...Wait, Smaug? Isn't that the name of a dragon from a book?"

Actions
>...Yes. Yes it is.
>If it is, they're clearly stealing my one-hundred percent, clearly original familar's name.
>...So, a Yuan-Ti with a snake, eh? That's clearly original.
>Oh hey, you read Tolken's work?
>Sh, I'm trying to learn.
>Write-In

>>585412
>Yes. Yes it is.

>>585412
>...Yes. Yes it is.
>Oh hey, you read Tolken's work?

"Yes. Yes it is."

She gives you a slight grin.

"I presume you read Tolken?"

"Goddamn it, I was going to ask that."

"Well, do you?"

You can't help but sigh.

"Erh, no. I don't have the time. Or the money to import it from Britian."

I'm pretty sure we do. We could just ask Elizabeth for a copy.

Shush, you.

"Well, I personally only own his first work."

"I heard it was his best."

"I'm trying to save up for his second one, which is coming out in a few months. Problem is, it's hard to afford it."

"Really? Why?"

"Have you ever tried to import a book while you live off of meat cereal because you spent all your money on textbooks?"

"...Meat cereal?"

"Yeah."

Actions.

>Well, I hope you have good luck with that.
>...If you want, I could give you the money to import it.
>...What's your name, anyways?
>...I'm trying to work, damn it!
>...Could I borrow your book then?
>...Erh, just wondering... You wouldn't happen to be in D&D then? Lord of the Rings isn't that popular to anyone but nerds.
>Who the hell came up with the idea of meat cereal? The meat would get all soggy, and the milk would basically just be blood!
>Write-In

>>585470
>Well can I borrow your book?
>I could give you the money to import it.
>You into D&D?

>>585470
>...If you want, I could give you the money to import it.
>...Erh, just wondering... You wouldn't happen to be in D&D then? Lord of the Rings isn't that popular to anyone but nerds.

"Well, can I borrow your book then?"

"Erh... Well, I'm not sure. It's my mo-"

"I could give you the money to import the second book, when it comes out."

She gets upbeat, and her grin turns into a wide smile, and she practically is shocked by you giving her this.

"Really?"

"Well, yeah."

You hand her nearly a hundred and fifty in Swedish Marks.

"Thank you, thank you so much!"

"Hey, no problem."

She looks down at the money, and... Well, she seems very happy.

"...Erh, you sure you don't need this?"

"Keep it... Say, you wouldn't happen to into D&D, would you?"

"...How the hell could you tell?"

"That's the easy part."

"Well, personally I'm not really a "roleplayer" person."

Actions

>...Well, why don't you give me your number and name? I think we should hang out some time.
>Are you a munchkin?
>When was the last time you played?
>I've got another question... Are you into Warhammer?
>...So uh, what's your name? You never did tell me.
>Write-In

>>585539
>...So uh, what's your name? You never did tell me.
>I've got another question... Are you into Warhammer?

>>585539
>Are you a munchkin?
>Well why don't you give me your number and name. We can hang out sometime.

>>585539
>>When was the last time you played?
>>I've got another question... Are you into Warhammer?
>>...So uh, what's your name? You never did tell me.

"So uh, what's your name?"

"It's Skjolka."

"Huh. Just wondering, when was the last time you played?"

"...I think a year or two ago."

"Why?"

"Our party's mage fell into a hole, and all of us had a little too much to drink... We came up with retarded ideas, sufficiently said."

"Oh. I totally understand."

"Yeah."

"Just wondering, are you a munchkin?"

"...Yeah, sorry."

You smile slightly.

"It's fine. I am too."

"Heh. What's the best stat?"

"Intelligence."

"Smart."

"Was that a pun?"

"No comment."

You sigh.

"...I've got a question. Are you into Warhammer?"

"...Isn't that the one with the grimdark as hell story?"

"Yeah."

She shrugs her shoulders.

"I can't afford to get the books, but the 40k one seems interesting enough."

Actions.

>...I have a tattoo of the Khornate Symbol. Warhammer's pretty cool.
>...Well, you might want to. All that shit is real.
>Erh, yeah. Good. Warhammer sucks.
>I think my friend is really into Warhammer.
>What's the best faction in Fantasy and 40k?
>Write-In

>>585580
>...I have a tattoo of the Khornate Symbol. Warhammer's pretty cool.

>>585580
>>...Well, you might want to. All that shit is real.

"You know, I have a tattoo of the Khornate Symbol. Warhammer's pretty cool in my book. Plus, all that shit's real."

She smiles.

"Heh, sure it is... Well, I just realized you haven't told me your name. Sorry for not asking."

Actions.

>...Oh, that's not a problem.
>Seriously. I'm not joking.
>Just call me Ren.
>Oh. Well, I'm Renexizious. You might of heard of me.
>Write-In

>>585650
>I'm Renexizious.

>>585650
>Seriously. I'm not joking.
>Just call me Ren.

"Oh. I'm Renexizious."

She giggles slightly.

"Your a terrible joker."

You sigh.

"Just call me Ren then. But seriously, I'm not joking."

"Yeah, I'll just pray to Khorne and I'll get horns or something."

The professor takes a glance in your direction.

"Oh. Uh, sorry. Listen, we'll talk once class is over, alright?"

Actions.

>...That's fine.
>...Why don't we grab lunch together? A friend owes me a beer anyways.
>I'm not joking! You've got to believe me!
>...I wouldn't test that worshipping a chaos god theory if I was you.
>Come on, let's just talk a little longer, alright?
>Write-In

>>585693
>I wouldn't test that worshipping a chaos god thing
>Why don't we grab lunch together?

>>585693
>...I wouldn't test that worshipping a chaos god theory if I was you.
>...Why don't we grab lunch together? A friend owes me a beer anyways.

>>585702
This.

"I wouldn't test that worshippping a chaos god thing. But why don't we grab lunch together?"

"Sure."

The yuan-ti turns back to her familar, and you go back to yours.

Hey uh, Ren?

What?

...Why do you keep telling people we're Renexizious? I mean, we are. But I sort of like it better if people don't really know us.

Erh, why?

Then people get "oh my god don't eat me" or "oh shit fuck this".

Actions.

>...Good point, Flames.
>That's the path of being human, Flames. And humans are boring.
>I do it because I like flaunting my presence. And because it's the truth.
>...Let me guess, you want to just go up to people and try to be normal or something?
>Write-In

>>585735
>Write-In
"And people like honest flames. So if given the choice between someone believing my reputation as the literal scum of the earth or acting like one. I will choose to let them develop their own opinions associated with my name.

Also, if we avoid using our name then not only would I actually have to keep track of all the shit I say but I wouldn't be slowly convincing parts of the populous that I am okay."

>>585735
>>...Good point, Flames.

>>585747
This.

>>585747
Switching to this.

And people like honesty Flames. So if given the choice between someone believing my reputation as the literal scum of the earth or acting like one. I will choose to let them develop their own opinions associated with my name.

Also, if we avoid using our name then not only would I actually have to keep track of all the shit I say but I wouldn't be slowly convincing parts of the populous that I am okay.

What I'm trying to say here is that I'm a sucker for dramatic reveals. I just would prefer it when someone talks to us that we avoid going to "IT'S RENEXIZIOUS" and just say "Oh, just call me Ren."

Actions.

>...Oh. Well, I can do that.
>...Flames, that's called half-honesty. And it's not nice.
>We're already doing that.
>...Anyways, I'm busy trying to learn how to control Smaug better.
>Write-in

>>585773
>We're already doing that.
>Write-in
"... It's not our fault that the conversation keeps coming back to how we are their loving draconic overlord-pope."

We're already doing that... Besides. it's not our fault that the conversation keeps coming back to how we are their loving draconic overlord-pope.

Loving?

In more ways then one!

Kinky. Anyways, that's just my little complaint.

Actions.

>...So, we might actually getting back to D&D. Are you pumped yet?
>...Dare I ask you of your opinion on Skjolka?
>...Any opinions about Bastian?
>Have you forgiven me yet about the whole "kiling Reinhold" thing?
>So, any thoughts about God right now?
>...Just because I can, why don't we discuss how we should expand our realm?
>Well, I'm going back to reality.
>Write-In

>>585797
>Write-In
"So I am thinking about ways to improve our nation and wanted to know what you think;

1) Giant transport network improvement, from the Swedish heartlands to the furthest corner of Russia in record times.

2) Just improving our industrial technology, keeping the patents of course, and developing more industries.

3) Grand library, like the last 13 attempts by every other great ruler.

4) Turn the Urals into a Giant underground nuke proof supercity. Potentially links to plan 1.

5) Getting every scientist, engineer, sociologist, inventor and industrialist we can together to just brainstorm improvements. Attempt to conceive of a city of tomorrow and all that good stuff. Links to plan 4."
>Well, I'm going back to reality.

So I am thinking about ways to improve our nation and wanted to know what you think;

Firstly, we make a giant transport network improvement, from the Swedish heartlands to the furthest corner of Russia in record times...

We're going to need a lot more money for that. We could barely afford building a railroad from Stockholm to Hansodr, to Osloo.

Well, then also just improving our industrial technology, keeping the patents of course, and developing more industries.

I suppose that's good... But we'll need more advanced factories then just fucking farms.

Oh, and a grand library, like the last 13 attempts by every other great ruler.

Sounds good.

Oh, and turn the Urals into a Giant underground nuke proof supercity. Potentially links to plan number one.

Uh... We're going to need a fucking ton of money.

And finally, getting every scientist, engineer, sociologist, inventor and industrialist we can together to just brainstorm improvements. Attempt to conceive of a city of tomorrow and all that good stuff. Links to plan four.

We're going to need a METRIC fuckton of money. Or slave labor.

You return to reality... The professor seems to be teaching everyone about familar's "battle forms". You can't help but look down at Smaug, who's somewhat fat compared to everyone else's familar.

"WHAT?!"

"...You have a battle form?"

"OF COURSE I DO! I AM THE GREAT DESTROYER! I KILL WITHOUT MER-"

You can't help but laugh.

"Oh Smaug..."

"YOU KNOW NAUGHT OF MY MASTER PLAN!"

You pat him on the top of his head. He may be a fat fucking familar. but he's your fat fucking disgrace of a familar.

"...KEEP IT UP AND I MIGHT JUST SPARE YOU MY WRATH!"

Actions.

>...You wish.
>Well, one day you'll become big and strong like me. Maybe. I'm not really sure.
>...Smaug, remind me to feed you when we get home. I keep forgetting.
>Come on Smaug, give me your battle form or whatever.
>...I'll give you a treat if you just shift into your battle form, whatever the fuck that is..
>Write-in

>>585908
>>Well, one day you'll become big and strong like me. Maybe. I'm not really sure.
>>I'll give you a treat if you switch.

inb4 Smaug is actually a colossal terror

>>585908
>Well, one day you'll become big and strong like me. Maybe. I'm not really sure.

"Well, maybe one day you'll become big and strong like me. Maybe. I'm not really sure."

"I AM ALREADY THE STRONGEST CREATURE IN THE COSMO-"

"I'll give you a treat if you switch to your battle form."

He looks up at you, tempted.

"...What sort of treat?"

"One hundred percent, all natural steak."

He licks his mouth greedily.

"THAT WILL SUFFICE FOR NOW, MORTAL!"

"...Good."

"NOW STAND BACK, AS I WANT MY TREAT GIVER INTACT. AT LEAST FOR NOW!"

Actions.

>...Erh, maybe you should ask if your supposed to do this?
>For science! Stand back!
>...Nah. I'm fine where I am.
>If I'm unimpressed Smaug, I swear to God...
>Write-In

>>585943
>For science! Stand back!
>Tell our new D&D buddy to stand back.

>>585958
This

"Hey uh, Skjolka?" You say, while you get out of your chair."

"What?"

"You might want to stand back."

"Erh, why?"

"I'm about to put my familar in his battle form."

"I'm not sure if we're allowed to do that."

Actions.

>So? No one's going to be hurt.
>What's the use in learning magic if we're not going to use it?
>It's too late! Get out of your chair!
>...Erh... Shit.
>Write-in

>>585985
>>It's too late! Get out of your chair!

>>585985
>Write-in
"I regret nothing!"

"It's too late! Get out of your chair! I REGRET NOTHING!"

She looks over your shoulder and quickly gets out of her chair with her little snake familar.

You turn around and see Smaug become bigger, and crush the desk you were sitting at. He becomes rather large, about the size of seven desks.

"FEAR ME MORTALS!" He yells, and begins laughing.

"Goddamn it! Who the fuck is the smartass who decided to put their familar in battle form?" The dwarven teacher yells. He quickly locks eyes with you, while Smaug seems to begin to fly around the classroom.

Actions.

>...Smaug, shift back to your normal form! Now!
>...Smaug, shift back or I won't give you your treat!
>Smaug, shift back and I'll give you MORE treats!
>Erh, good job Smaug?
>I can explain teacher!
>...So uh, can you get your familar to also go into battle form?
>Rush to the fire alarm! It's the only way!
>Write-In

>>586055
>Smaug, shift back and I'll give you MORE treats!
>Write-In
"In my defence, he was being a smug bastard."

>>586055
>Smaug, shift back and I'll give you MORE treats!

"Smaug! Shift back and I'll give you MORE treats!"

He continues flying, but you can tell he looks tempted...

Roll me a 1d20+7.

Rolled 8 + 7 (1d20 + 7)

>>586089
Smaug that fat bastard.

Rolled 18 + 7 (1d20 + 7)

>>586089

18+7=25

Great Success!

He lands in front of you, crushing a desk.

"...I WILL SPARE YOU THIS TIME, MORTAL."

You sigh. Smaug begins going back to his dog-sized self.

"...Erh, your familiar has quite the personality."

"You can say that again..."

The dwarf teacher comes up to you, pissed off.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING LADDIE!"

Actions.

>...It's not my fault, Smaug told me to do it!
>Come on, you've got to admit that was funny.
>...It's a one time thing, alright?
>Smaug, apologize to the dwarf.
>Erh, sorry about that. It won't happen again.
>Write-In

>>586123
>Smaug, apologize to the dwarf.
>Erh, sorry about that. It won't happen again.

"Erh, sorry about that. It won't happen again. Smaug, apologize to the dwarf."

"WHY? HE IS BUT A WORM BENEATH MY FEET!"

Actions.

>...Smaug, it's not nice to damage other people's classrooms.
>...Don't make me regret giving you more treats then what you deserve.
>Please? Do it, and I'll give you an additional treat.
>That's his little way of saying sorry, teacher.
>...Pet Smaug? Maybe he'll be in a better mood?
>Write-In

>>586175
>>...Smaug, it's not nice to damage other people's classrooms.
>>...Don't make me regret giving you more treats then what you deserve.

"Smaug, it's not nice to damage other people's classrooms... And don't make me regret giving you more treats then what you deserve."

He growls softly.

"...FINE. I AM SORRY, FOOLISH MORTAL."

You glare at him.

"...WHAT?"

You can't help but sigh.

"That's uh, his way of saying that he's sorry."

"Don't let it happen again, alright."

You nod your head, and unsummon Smaug. The teacher storms off.

"Class is over, I suppose."

Smaug now has a Battle Form!

"...Well, that was interesting."

"Yes. Yes it was."

The two of you walk (while the oher one slithers).

"I'm surprised he didn't chew you out."

"...Yeah. Same."

"Anyways, I'm going to grab lunch. You coming?"

Actions.

>Sure. My next class isn't for the next hour or so.
>Eh... I like to be early. Sorry.
>Just wondering, is your familiar more friendly then mine?
>Write-In