Club Quest

Rolled 82 (1d100)

>>397787
Ask him to let you in

Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>397787
Bribe the fucker like everyone else.

>>397787
Flash him that fake ID.

Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>397787
Glass Him

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>>397853
You ask to be let in, and he asks for your name. Better play your cards right here

Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>397976
Read a name off the paper he's holding and say that.

Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>397787
"I believe I had them put down my name as "Super Dank-wang"."

Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>397976
Sorry; can't blow my cover.

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>>398074
You tell the bouncer your name should be written down as "Super Dank-wang." The bouncer is visibly displeased and about to beat the hell out of you. Ah geez, how do you react?

Rolled 59 (1d100)

>>398202
Let him punch you once then blast him with your legally concealed handgun in self defense.

>>398202
>>398250
i second that

Rolled 73 (1d100)

Say that you're here with the make a wish foundation, and that you're only trying to lighten the mood for the cancer patient.

>>398202
Say that you are retarded and have a fake stroke

>>398295
This

>>398295
This.

>>398494
Maybe I'll roll this time?

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>>398295
Before the bouncer totally knocks you out, you quickly explain that you're here with the Make A Wish foundation, and you were only trying to lighten the mood for the cancer patient. The bouncer looks around for a second and says, "What cancer patient?" How do you respond?

>>398520
say "The one in that alley over there."

>>398520
>point both fingers at the bouncer
>say "You!"

Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>398572
Sorry, I forgot to roll

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>>398580
You point both fingers at the bouncer and say, "You!" The bouncer is enraged at this point, and a fight is now near impossible to avoid. How will you handle this?

Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>398250
Do this, except now.

Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>398810
Produce fake documents saying the bouncer has cancer.
"I'm sorry to tell you like this, but we couldn't wait until you got off work." "On the upside, the Make a Wish foundation is giving you one free wish"

Rolled 82 (1d100)

>>398834
this

Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>398810
Test your seduction skills.
If that fails, call you hot sister to do it for you.
Again....

Are we allowed to reroll for other people?
That seems like it could be exploited if someone has both a phone and computer.

>>398868
Forgot to reply to >>398841

>>398868
*shrugs*
I want it to happen, so I guess it's my own roll in a way

>>398868
Rerolls allowed, but only once.
Update coming in a bit, am in the process of moving. No decision yet, feel free to keep the ideas coming

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>>398841
Before the bouncer absolutely tears you to shreds, you pull out some totally not fake documents (haha yeah they are) that he in fact has terminal cancer. The bouncer reads them, and is immediately grief stricken. How could this happen to him? He bursts into tears, too wracked with emotional trauma to think clearly. He asks,"What should I even do with my wish?" How do you proceed?

Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>399324
Just ask me to relive you from this exsistental night mare and all will be swell!
>proceed to pull out syringe and put on a winning smile.

Rolled 90 (1d100)

Tell him to use his wish to have you be his wingman tonight, "We're gonna get laid man! Besides, that testicle cancer will make it impossible, why not have one more night? For old time sake?"

"I mean it's inevitable that you've been waiting so long it's unlikely that you'll survive!" He make a wish guy said with a hugs smile on his face as the bouncer cries his soul out to his words

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>>399365
You tell the bouncer to use his wish to have you be his wingman tonight. The bouncer is touched by your kindness and accepts your offer. However, he says, "First, let me just call in my backup to cover the door for me. Then we'll go hit the town and find us some ladies one last time." No backup has been called yet, what do you do?

Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>399465
"Dude, do you really wanna hit the town when you got the jackpot of babes behind you? Come on, lets go in, get hammered, and get us some ladies, We don't have any time to spare!"

Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>399469
This

>>399465
Time for me to sleep, will try to post tomorrow, but for sure by Sunday. Bring on the action requests in the meantime, looking forward to it.

>>399488
OP here, thread isn't dead, still just moving. Currently driving to a different state. Expect update tonight

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>>399469
You ask the bouncer why hit the town when we could just head inside here. He suddenly looks nervous."You're not on the list, and the boss says no one goes in without being on the list. If we went in there, we wouldn't come back out alive." How do you react?

Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>403040
Whats the worst that could happen to you? you're gonna die anyways, just enjoy buddy@

Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>403414
This

Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>403414
This

Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>403040
While he's distracted, kick him in the balls and run in. This was the only logical choice since the second winning roll. Also, call him "super dank-wang" again as you're running in.

Teleport inside cause fuck the poleec

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>>403414
The bouncer gets ready to open the door. He turns to you and says, "Get ready, there are security cameras everywhere and we'll have about ten seconds before the armed guards head our way." What do you do heading in?

Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>404147
Make sure you have all your illegal substances on you such as the crack cocains and the Marijuanas before going in.

Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>404147
Enter with him but stay hidden from the cameras. By the time he's getting shot/taken down we'll be in the club partying.

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>>404152
You enter the club with your crack cocains and Marijuanas, ready for a good time. The bouncer is visibly shaken, knowing what's about to come. Ten seconds until armed guards are here. What do you do?

>>405511
pop out the drugs and start clubbing.

Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>405511
Use him as a meat shield for the guards and hide amongst the sea of dancers on the floor.

Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>405542

>>405511
Inform them there's no need to shoot, as it's not a gay club

Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>405690
This

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>>405690
The guards come down and immediately open fire on you and the bouncer. You use the bouncer as a shield and make your way to the sea of dancers on the floor. The guards don't see you, but they're looking for you among the other people. Unfortunately they know what you look like after seeing you on the security camera. It's only a matter of time until they find you. What do you do now?

>>415896
1. Inconspicuously knock out someone that doesn't look like us
2. Inconspicuously bring them to bathroom
3. Surgically remove said person's face
4. Graft face onto our face
5. ???
6. Profit

Good thing we're a world renowned MacGyver-type cosmetic surgeon.

>>419469
My roll fucked up...

Rolled 55 (1d100)

>>419472
...

Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>415896
Give the crack cocains and the marijuanas to the dancers,making them even crazier and slowing down the pursuers.

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>>419473
You knock out a nearby dancer and sneak them to the bathroom. Being a world renowned MacGuyver-type cosmetic surgeon, you quickly swap faces with your victim. You think to yourself, "Boy this would make a good movie plot, swapping faces with someone." You digress however. You make your way back to the dance floor, and soon hear two gunshots from the bathroom. Definitely the guards taking out that poor sap you swapped faces with. It looks like the coast is clear and you have accomplished your club quest.

That went pretty well. May start another quest unless someone would like to continue this story.

>>420889
wow

That was an interesting quest

Good one, OP. Hope to see you again

Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>420889
do all of the drugs

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>>422041
You do all of your drugs. You feel time slow down around you. You feel in tune with the universe. Everything feels malleable to your will.

But then again you're like crazy high, so maybe it's just that.

Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>422405
Start licking buttholes.

Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>422405

You remember that you are a actually a ninja and you disrectly killed all the guards with cocktail umbrella.