You're watching Adventure Call

Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>34590
Doktoro Esperanto

>>34624
Okay let us begin.
You're standing in a room with one door.
On the wall is a painting.
In the room is a table with a dagger.
What would you like to do?

>>34676
Stab the painting with the dagger.

>>34745
the dagger's hilt is poisoned
before you can stab the painting, you feel dizzy and shit your insides all over the floor
you are dead
let's take another call

Greetings line 2 what is your name?

Rolled 8 (1d20)

>>34772
jamal shekelstein

>>34782
Greetings Jamal!
You're standing in a room with one door.
On the wall is a painting.
In the room is a table with a dagger.
What would you like to do?

Rolled 12 (1d20)

>>34805
stab myself with the painting

>>34918
You grab the painting and try to stab yourself with it.
The painting is not sharp enough, and too heavy to wield.
You discover a hole in the wall where the painting was.
What would you like to do?

Rolled 1 (1d20)

>>34968
grab the tip of the knife and throw it down the hole

if nothing happens enter the hole

>>34989
You grab the tip of the knife and toss it into the hole.
Since the hole is horizontal, the dagger simply drops to the floor on a hidden passage ahead.
What would you like to do?

Rolled 3 (1d20)

>>35020
take off clothes and enter hole

>>35039
You take off your clothes and enter the hole.
The hidden passage leads to a tapestry blocking the view and you can hear organ music ahead.
What would you like to do?

Rolled 4 (1d20)

>>35081
follow music until it's loud, then observe the surrounding area quietly

>>35138
You go beyond the tapestry and find yourself at a wedding.
You recognize Lord Marius and Lady Elysa and a complement of guards armed with pikes.
The priest looks disapprovingly on your naked body.
What would you like to do?

Rolled 18 (1d20)

>>35177
ask for pants or a robe

ask to be the best man without being too pushy about it

>>35217
The bride calls for the guards, which promptly escort you to the dungeon.
Your request to be best man doesn't seem to find much favor.
You are now in the dungeons, naked and chained.
You are to be executed at dawn.
What would you like to do?

>>35251
put head in toilet

>>35341
You put your head in the toilet.
Your nose bumps on something sharp and you recoil.
You find a lockpick and a set of rings in the toilet.
What would you like to do?

>>35395
unchain self, open cell, find clothes, become best man

>>35395
Kill jester.

>>35456
You lockpick the chains and the door.
A guard is sitting at the entrance of the dungeon reading a scroll.
Do you still wish to ask him for clothes and the request of being best man to the wedding?

>>35477
Unfortunately Jester is not here adventurer.
Come back next week for more adventures with our friend Jester.

Rolled 10 (1d20)

>>35501
take scroll and run

use scroll as kilt

>>35550
You take the scroll and run out of the dungeon, using it as a kilt.
The guard in armor is much slower than you and you manage to outrun him up the stairs.
You arrive at a hallway at the top of the dungeon stairs, there is a passage to the east and west.
North is a large set of stone stairs.
What would you like to do, traveler?

Rolled 15 (1d20)

>>35602
go up stairs and jump off building as soon as possible

>>35830
You go up the stairs and find an open window.
You jump.
You land on a soft bed of grass two feet down.
You are in the King's gardens. There is a greenhouse to your left and a pond to your right.
What would you like to do?

>>35532
find jester

>>36073
>this

Rolled 5 (1d20)

>>35864
drown myself in pond