Boredom Empire

I promise I have some cool ideas in mind. Bump

Bump
I am an excellent questmaster.

>>288196
Alaska

>>288219
Virginia Home of the real boredom!

>>288324
We should stick to the mainland.

>>288331
Where in Virginia?

>>288196
Name:Anon anonymous the third
State:Detroit

>>288342
Richmond.

>>288350
Name can be uh.. Clyde Dillinger

>>288196
That long a.
nd thin county in South-Central Washington on the Border with Oregon
Kaiser

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>>288344
Dubs gets it.

You will be known as Anon, and from now on this quest will be titled Anon Conquers the World.

Anon, you are a smart kid. You have studied the words of Sun Tzu, Napoleon, Alexander the Great, Hannibal, Hitler- great conquerors of this world, all sharing in common the ultimate destruction of their empires. So you say, no more. You will be the answer- the final conqueror of the world, who will build an empire that unites humanity under its rule. You have felt you were marked for greatness since the day you were born, though your parents and peers never quite picked up on it. But you'll show them. You'll show them all.

What is your family like?

> big family, i am one of many siblings
> small family, i have one or two siblings
> i am an only child

>>288426
>> small family, i have one or two siblings

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>>288435
Alright.

You were born in the suburb of Grosse Pointe, Michigan. It's a pretty nice area and you have lead a fairly sheltered life, all things considered. Your parents are conservative Christians and extremely normal. You have two twin brothers, named Rodney and Todd.

You go to Grosse Pointe South High School. It's very white and a good school. You should be lucky to go there.

But you don't feel very appreciative today, because today you have decided to conquer the world. You awaken in your room in your quaint Grosse Pointe home. It's time to get to work.

You'll need a plan. Your available materials are everything in your room, your laptop computer, and anything not nailed to the floor that you won't get caught stealing. Fuck the law, your only goal now is to make all the relevant authorities bend the knee.

>>288557
How good are we at science and doomsday devices? Guess we'll google a good plot to embellish on. Just like a real 15 yr old!

>>288557
Search on the internet how to make a nuclear device and or bioweapons.

>>288593
First we need to get support from some crazies.
Every supervillain needs henchmen

>>288619
This is true before we research tech where is the nearest gathering place of crazies? i.e Juggalo rally or asylum

>>288629
Firstly I need to know where we are politically. This could help out with this.

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>>288593
>>288599
Roll a d10 to see how successful your googling is. Most things in this game are accomplished through the magic of the d10. You have stats that help you in your rolls, but you can't see them... At least, YOU can't see them.

>>288641
What did he mean by this? Where we are politically? You mean like Anon's political views?

It is currently 7:30AM. The bus for school leaves at 8:30AM. Normally you would be taking a shower right now, but obviously circumstances have changed.

>>288666
This quest has been blessed by Satanic trips by the way.

Rolled 9 (1d10)

>>288666

>>288666
Yeah, the political views.

>>288676
You learn that there are several plots of land nearby for sale, all of which would be perfect for building embellishments upon.

>>288687
Because you are Anon, you decide what your political views are. You have spent much of your life on the internet, just like in real life. So it's up to you, and that's a big part of the game.

>>288692
We're a hardcore Liberal Democrat.

>>288692
A fascist, not the Hitler type, but the edgy elitist Mussolini type

>>288698
haha ok

>>288698
no need, they already run america

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>>288698
>>288703
Actions, not labels. Here's one non-negotiable political value you can slap on yourself: You want to be the king, or the emperor, or whatever. You and you alone.

Still need some actions, guys. Are we googling still? Are we going to school? You smell pretty bad, remember there are benefits to looking nice that go beyond simple social acceptance.

>>288666
satanist cult theocracy in honor of OP. maximum edge for 15 year old ruler

>>288698
How about German Empire style? also he could be of German descent proud of his heritage?

>>288724
Take a shower then look into finding a flunky burn out to help us get that land.

>>288755
Alright, after getting nice and clean in le shower you step right out, dry yourself off and head over to the closet to get dressed.

What do you decide to wear today? You have clothes for pretty much all occasions.

>>288770
>288770
Khakis and a nice shirt you'd usually wear for church. Rulers have to look neat, the ska band shirts have to go.

>>288770
Casual-ish lets go with a nice pair of jeans and a button up.

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>>288779
>>288780
Seems like we're pretty much in agreement here, semi-formal is the way to go.

You dress in your Sunday best. Now you look presentable, what do you do next?

You have some friends at school- who knows how useful they would be. You also have pretty good relationships with your teachers. But you're no Chad, so don't expect popular support to come easy just by walking through the door.

Or you don't have to go to school at all. The choice is yours.

All of a sudden, your mom calls: "Good morning, Anon!" From beyond your door you also hear your twin brothers clambering downstairs.

>>288779
You also sadly toss aside your Reel Big Fish shirt. Where we're going, we can't take you, old buddy.

>>288799
We should go to school, for now, we don't want the pigs getting us over truancy

>>288827
Yeah lets go network with the other kids and see who will fit in the new world order.

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>>288827
>>288836
Alright, you've decided to go to school! You've got some time before the bus gets here, so you should probably examine your room or something first. Y'know, like a smart /qst/er.

>>288863
Yeah lets examine the shit outta that there room!

>>288863
See if the house has any guns so you can shoot up the school if something goes wrong.

>>288863
Look for guns in the house.

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>>288872
Your room is pretty basic- you have a collection of books, random toys from your childhood in your closet, a guitar you can't play, a set of bongos from your family trip to Mexico. There are maps on the wall. Under the bed, you have $50 saved up from your allowance, a portion of which you recently used to buy the Sonic Adventure games for yourself on Steam.

>>288878
>>288898
You know for a fact your dad keeps at least one gun somewhere in the house, but you don't know where to look- and searching for it could be risky, especially if you want to get to school on time. Then again, you don't really care about attendance so much as it helps you conquer the world, so it's up to you.

>>288922
Grab the money, look around the house for Dad's gun(s).

>>288935
WWSD? look for a mo fuckin firearm.

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>>288935
>>288947
You grab the money and stick it in your pocket. You now have 50 dollars in your inventory.

Time to look for dad's gun. Where do you check first? You are on the second floor of your house- your family is downstairs. The family rooms are all upstairs. There is also a backyard with a shed.

>>289009
Check you're parents room. We will find that gun.

>>289009
I'm out. this is turning into a columbine RP

>>289009
Ah shit gotta fake the funk. Go say Hi to the f a m then leave like were going to school and loop back to the shed hide in there till the coast is clear checking for fire arms whilst in there waiting.

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>>289022
Do you think I would let that happen? But it stands to reason that if you want to do some conquering, you need a weapon, right?

Either that or the quest players are retards and I will end up punishing them for it. Or maybe everything will go right for them. But don't think I forget the purpose, the plans and the mechanics for this quest.

>>289040
Yeah that! Cant take over the world with a gun but it's a start I say. Promise not to trench coat mafia the school senpai.

>>289009
Check behind furniture and in the shed

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>>289021
>>289023
As you're walking out of your room, your mother calls for you.

"Anon, come get some breakfast!"

Looks like we know what we're doing.

You travel downstairs and take a seat at the table. Your home is a nice, quaint Midwestern home, filled with the assorted knickyknacky accessories and tacky ornaments you would expect to find in a home owned by people who think Family Circus is funny. Your mom is washing the dishes or something by the sink. Dad is reading the paper.

Rod and Todd approach you from behind. "Hey, twerp," they goad in unison. Uh oh. What do you do?

>>289092
>Rod and Todd approach you from behind. "Hey, twerp," they goad in unison. Uh oh. What do you do?
Grab the kitchen knife and try to stab them.

>>289103
Little trigger-happy there, eh, sport? You make it seem like this isn't a near-daily occurrence.

>>289092
Tell Todd fallout 4 was shit and that you pirated it, tell rod he's a alright sibling.

>>289105
We're gonna have to start somewhere desu

>>289092
'Mooom the twins were playing in your clothes again!"

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>>289111
You decide to use the nuclear option on your final day as a normal person and tell your mother about the twins' proclivities for experimentation with lady's clothing.

Your mother and father are both shocked. The twins look intensely embarrassed. "Y-you saw us, punk?" they stammer. Suddenly your father's face grows red.

"So this is true? He wasn't spouting his autism... nonsense again?"

Oh man, now you've done it. The twins are going to stay home from school today with your parents to talk about their little habit. You are spared from the family meeting, and quietly slip away for the bus at the height of the arguing.

You are now on the school bus, on the way to school. It's a pretty big bus, for a small kid like you anyway.

>>289151
Find the biggest and dumbest kid there and hire them as muscle.

>>289164
Yeah the kid you give a snickers bar too and gain his friendship forever and ever.

>>289151
Find a weapon at school and hold the Principle hostage.

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>>289164
>>289170
Ah yes, big and small. For every Cait Sith requires a giant moogle to ride. Every Donkey needs a Diddy. Every Kazooie, a Banjo. Every Froggy a Big the Cat. Every Waluigi a Wario, every Vegeta a Nappa. Every Timon a Pumba. Every Mike a Sully. Every Han Solo needs a Chewbacca, and every Inigo Montoya needs a Fezzik. That's Andre the Giant's character if you don't remember. But yes, big and small, what a natural combination. You sidle up to one of the really big boys on the bus, his name is Jeremy Wrinkle. What do you say to him, he's looking at you because you're looking at him all funny?

>>289204
'Hey man noticed your always sitting alone and listening to what was that band? killamotherfucker? Yeah their great and I think we should be pals. Watch each others backs -n- such.'

>>289204
Looking to make some cash? I need muscle and you look like your nothing but it.

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>>289214
"You know Killamufucka? You my homie, now. LOL" (he says LOL out loud)

>>289224
After buttering him up, you go in for the kill. You flash your fat wad of cash before his eyes and they immediately light up in intrigue. "Wow," the oaf salivates. "Looks good. How I get that? Cash I mean." Haha, what a buffoon. What do you say?

>>289255
We gottta round up more 'killamufucka' fans think you can do that? were gonna start a fan club of sorts.

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More questing tomorrow

>>289362
Woot thanks for runnin

>>289362
>Tomorrow
>Posted 4 days ago