[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / bant / biz / c / can / cgl / ck / cm / co / cock / d / diy / e / fa / fap / fit / fitlit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mlpol / mo / mtv / mu / n / news / o / out / outsoc / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / spa / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vint / vip / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y ] [Search | Free Show | Home]

Normal Quest

This is a blue board which means that it's for everybody (Safe For Work content only). If you see any adult content, please report it.

Thread replies: 341
Thread images: 81

File: 1.gif (5KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
1.gif
5KB, 640x480px
You are just an average guy. You have just woken up from your eight hours of sleep, and you're ready to start your day! What will you do?
>>
>>24341
Hang out with and watch sportsball irl friends like a normal person
>>
>>24341
Be normal.
>>
Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>24358
>>24341
Wait, scratch that, play YU-GI-OH!
>>
>>24341
go to work
>>
Rolled 20 (1d20)

>>24341

We need that breakfast to start us off properly.
>>
File: 2.gif (9KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
2.gif
9KB, 640x480px
>>24375
You'd love to, but you only have normal playing cards. You do manage to start a thrilling game of 52 pickup, though!
>>
>>24555
Be Pablo Escobar.
>>
Rolled 13 (1d20)

>>24555
Open door, get out
>>
File: 3.gif (9KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
3.gif
9KB, 640x480px
>>24396
>>24600
You decide to go to work at you job, which just so happens to be cleaning toilets at the local high school. You open your front door to leave, only to realize it's a closet.
>>
>>24629
Obtain normal arms.
>>
>>24629
you promptly search for a rope to hang yourself- because youre a fucking janitor
>>
File: 4.gif (9KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
4.gif
9KB, 640x480px
>>24513
You eat your hanger for sustenance. Your hunger level drops.
>>
>>24667
jump out of the window and get to work BEFORE YOU ARE FIRED
>>
>>24667
Eat hunger.
>>
Rolled 15 (1d20)

>>24667
Dropkick window
>>
File: 5.gif (12KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
5.gif
12KB, 640x480px
>>24654
Luckily you always keep your sidearm in your pocket. You just can never be sure when you need to protect yourself, or hold up a bank.
>>
>>24777
shoot yourself in the head because youre a fucking janitor
>>
>>24810
Why not shoot up those shitty kids?
>>
File: 6.gif (9KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
6.gif
9KB, 640x480px
>>24810
You decide it's high time to off yourself, so you decide to eat your gun.

However, it seems you took that phrase literally.
>>
>>24880
Become Normal Gunman.
>>
>>24880
look out the window
>>
File: I'musedtothis.jpg (23KB, 432x403px) Image search: [Google]
I'musedtothis.jpg
23KB, 432x403px
>>24880
Make a normal breakfast of Regular Showios, with the bland taste of 100% normally made wheat.
>>
>>24957
Spork or spoon?
>>
File: Stare.gif (474KB, 127x139px) Image search: [Google]
Stare.gif
474KB, 127x139px
>>24982
With a spoon. Sporks have a tendency of hurting your tongue when you out it in.
>>
File: 7.gif (17KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
7.gif
17KB, 640x480px
>>24710
You attempt to jump out your window like a fucking madman. You miss completely.
>>
File: tegaki.png (8KB, 400x400px) Image search: [Google]
tegaki.png
8KB, 400x400px
>>24880
now u r gunman
>>
>>25016
Punch window and break the glass in a fit of rage for missing the window
>>
>>25016
Make a bland breakfast of Regular Showios, with 100% normally made wheat materials. Eat with a spoon.
>>
>>25016
Just take the stairs like a normal person.
>>
>>25016
finger your butthole
>>
File: 8.gif (13KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
8.gif
13KB, 640x480px
>>25057
You're so fucking mad at your piece of shit goddamn window that you decide to use all your BOXING SKILLS to annihilate the stupid thing.

Unfortunately you're WEAK AS SHIT. The glass holds fast.
>>
>>25333
This is starting to become suspicious. Normal people can punch through adamantite for goodness sake. Are you sure you are who you say you are, normal guy? Look me in the eye and answer me.
>>
>>25333
Use the playing cards to cut the window open
>>
File: 9.gif (12KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
9.gif
12KB, 640x480px
>>25065
You decide to stop trying to beat up inanimate objects, and head for your KITCHEN. You eye your favorite cereal on the table.
>>
>>25612
Look at the nearest mirror you normal fuck, prove to me you're normal. The cereal can tag along too, itll make for a pretty good team mate
>>
File: 10.gif (14KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
10.gif
14KB, 640x480px
>>25632
You take your cereal to a nearby mirror. You gaze longingly at yourself, and your wonderful mustache. It takes you 15 minutes to realize this is actually a portrait of you from before you shaved.
>>
Rolled 7 (1d20)

>>25793
break mirror with face
>>
>>25793
Look at a real mirror you suspiciously normal guy, also treat your cereal companion to a fresh cold one , on us.
>>
File: 11.gif (53KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
11.gif
53KB, 640x480px
>>25824
You smash a real mirror with the portrait of your face.
>>
>>25907
Get malk and a bowl
>>
Ugh, and that story was going well too
>>
Rolled 15 (1d20)

>>25907
find exit and exit out the exit
>>
File: 12.gif (96KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
12.gif
96KB, 640x480px
>>25936
You decide to stop fucking about and get your breakfast made already. You didn't have any milk, so you decided to substitute it with a little vinegar. You didn't have a regular bowl either.
>>
>>26079
Strong men eats with no spoon

Eat then go to work to look at high school girls poop
>>
File: 13.gif (9KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
13.gif
9KB, 640x480px
>>26135
>>25960
After eating your delicious meal (it was fucking disgusting) you decide to return to your previous task of trying to get to work. You come back to your only known exit, your window.

You open it like a sensible person.
>>
>>26209
Examine our various levels, including our hunger level, and then leave
>>
>>26209
Get out into the world and steal high school girls virginitys
>>
File: 14.gif (8KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
14.gif
8KB, 640x480px
>>26222
You take a quick look at your stats. You managed to get your HUNGER down to 3%. Good going!
>>
File: 15.gif (7KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
15.gif
7KB, 640x480px
>>26240
You climb out of your fifth story window.
>>
>>26525
Fuck

Grab a window ledge and assassin creed this shit
>>
>>26525
Fly into sun
>>
>>26525
Be the other guy.
>>
File: 16.gif (24KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
16.gif
24KB, 640x480px
>>26562
As you fall to your death, you briefly consider using your superpowers and flying to the Sun. Unfortunately, you are just a normal guy!
>>
>>26626
Grab on to the nearest thing to you
>>
>>26626
Land on your head, its your beast chances to survive.
>>
>>26626
Land normally on the ground. Like a normal person
>>
>>26626

As you plunge to your death, start to furiously masturbate.

Aim for that kid walking by, that cute little 8 year old girl.
>>
>>26626
Go to Heaven after you die.
>>
File: 17.gif (8KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
17.gif
8KB, 640x480px
>>26664
>>26672
You land and create a small CRATER.
>>
>>26761
Go to your 6 to 6 job now, we need our pay.
>>
>>26761
just die already
>>
>>26761
Explore crater, possibly for job opportunities.
>>
>>26761
Get out of the hole and go to your office job that you work from 9 to 5.
>>
File: 18.gif (6KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
18.gif
6KB, 640x480px
>>26688
>>26782
>>26791
You miraculously survive! Most likely because not even God wants you.
>>
>>26761
Get payed to fuck bitches already
>>
>>26808
Go to the nearest intersection and carjack somebody in order to get to work.
>>
>>26808
go to the hospital, that fall was extremely large
>>
Go back inside
>>
>>26808
Well fuck you god

Go rob a bank since clearly we cannot be harmed
>>
>>26837
this
>>
File: 19.gif (5KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
19.gif
5KB, 640x480px
>>26825
>>26810
On your way over to the nearest street corner, you briefly consider quitting your janitorial job in favor of becoming a male prostitute.
>>
>>26858
do it
>>
>>26858
Being a prostitute doesn't pay well enough unless you like taking it in the ass, so you proceed with the carjacking.
>>
>>26858
we have zero sex appeal so forget that idea
>>
>>26858
prostitute yourself on your way to the school
>>
>>26858
Do it but we're gonna be a fucking high class as fuck escort

Woman only and beautiful ones at that
>>
>>26858
but prostitution is already your job

you clean the wallets of the high schoolers in return for high quality lap dances
>>
Rolled 13 (1d20)

>>26858
>becoming a male prostitute.

Do it faggot.
>>
File: 20.gif (6KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
20.gif
6KB, 640x480px
>>26868
>>26883
>>26884
>>26932
You ask a nearby woman if she would be willing to have sex with you, and also pay you money for it.

She politely tells you to fuck off.

Man, you sure don't know how prostitution works!
>>
>>26967
go to the local library
>>
>>26967
Ask her to have sex with other people and give some of the money she gets to you.
>>
>>26967
Club the back of her head with a blackjack then cut off her hair

You need good hair to be a prostitute
>>
>>26967
Aren't you late for work?
>>
>>26967
you noob, that not how you prostitute. You are supposed to sneak up to the woman, grab her covering her mouth, drag her to the bushes or a dark alley, fuck her, take her money as a payment and voila! - another satisfied customer.
>>
File: 21.gif (15KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
21.gif
15KB, 640x480px
>>26986
You affix a small pimp hat on your head and ask her if she'd like to be one of your honeys. She knocks the wind out of you.
>>
>>27084
SELF DEFENSE

SMACK HER WITH THE BACK OF YOUR HAND
>>
>>27084
Take her wind to make up for the wind she made you lose.
>>
>>27084
Gouge out her eyes
>>
>>27084
Wad of cash. Her face. Make it happen.
>>
File: tegaki.png (157KB, 400x400px) Image search: [Google]
tegaki.png
157KB, 400x400px
>>24341
Hold breath until pass out and fall back to sleep and wait until tomorow
>>
>>27084
Hand her the hat and offer her some of your earnings in exchange for promotion and protection.
>>
File: 22.gif (12KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
22.gif
12KB, 640x480px
>>27330
You entice her with a five dollar bill. She threatens to call the cops.
>>
Rolled 5 (1d20)

>>29178
put the cash in her mouth and drag her into an alley, then take out your phone and film as you say "IT'S JUST A PRANK BRAH"
>>
File: 23.gif (31KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
23.gif
31KB, 640x480px
>>28112
You give her the pimp hat. She knocks you over and pummels you into the ground. You thought being a whore would be something like this, but you also thought sex would be involved.
>>
>>29338
Realize this is a stupid idea and get to your janitorial job before any faculty see you.
>>
File: 24.gif (4KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
24.gif
4KB, 640x480px
>>27012
>>29387
After you lie on the ground and contemplate your life for several hours, you realize you are late for work. Those toilets aren't going to clean themselves!
>>
>>29393
Lets-a-go

To the land of raging hormonal wimmin
>>
>>29393
Go get a McDonald's breakfast before it's too late
>>
File: tegaki.png (8KB, 400x400px) Image search: [Google]
tegaki.png
8KB, 400x400px
>>29393
Piss all over the ground
>>
You put on your headphones, careful to avoid local bystanders, and listen to TRUMP 105.5 (your favorite talk radio station ).
>>
File: 25.gif (14KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
25.gif
14KB, 640x480px
>>29565
You decide that on your way to work, you want to listen to some news about making America great again. You take out your PORTABLE RADIO and affix it to your belt. You also put on your headphones in case there's a stray Bernie supporter nearby.
>>
>>29716
Tune radio to search for alien broadcasts
>>
File: 26.gif (6KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
26.gif
6KB, 640x480px
>>29493
You arrive at the HIGH SCHOOL.
>>
>>29763
Get out your trusty sidearm from >>24777
and shoot up the school.
>>
2d6
>>29763
Go to math class and woo ladies with your SUPERIOR INTELLECT
>>
Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>29776
Shoot up the school. With cleanliness
>>
>>29776
he already ate his trusy sidearm
READ THE LORE
>>
>>29987
Fire bullets from your belly button, that's how these things work.
>>
>>29903
holy fuck that's a nice roll

do it
>>
File: 27.gif (19KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
27.gif
19KB, 640x480px
>>29903
You enter the school. You spray a kid in the face with FEBREZEâ„¢.
>>
>>30166
kick him in nuts

walk away

pimphat on, get teenaged honeys
>>
dice+2d6
>>30166
Swiffer the hallways
>>
Rolled 6, 6 = 12 (2d6)

>>30187
>>
>>30166
Seduce the female teacher whos wearing the pimp hat.
>>
>>30166
realize what you've done, start to have an epiphany, and throw your radio at him and run away crying
>>
File: 28.gif (29KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
28.gif
29KB, 640x480px
>>30187
You aggressively clean the hallway. Damn kids are always making a mess.
>>
File: 29.gif (42KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
29.gif
42KB, 640x480px
>>30318
You don't wish to part with your RADIO, but you do unplug your headphones so the kid can listen to the wise words of Donald Trump.
>>
>>32798
Turn perspectivewise behind normal guy
>>
File: 30.gif (36KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
30.gif
36KB, 640x480px
>>32890
You view the scene from the inside of a locker. Damn, it sure is hard to see out of this thing!
>>
>>32966
Weep.
>>
>>32798
>>32966
clean the kid, might as well give him a free bath if hes just gonna lay there.
>>
File: 31.gif (58KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
31.gif
58KB, 640x480px
>>33361
You give this kid a good rub down. Can't say you never did nothin' for the children!
>>
>>33601

Walk on, don't look back
Pretend you can't hear him
Start to whistle as you cross the hallway
Seem embarrassed to be there
>>
>>33601
you've given this hallway and its inhabitant a satisfactory rubdown. make your way towards the bathrooms.
>>
>>33601
go clean the girl's lockeroom
>>
>>33601
find the local bullies and try and convince them to become your goons, and slowly form a school mafia based around stealing kids lunch money.
>>
>>33601
Pants him and run.
>>
>>33601
Remember that your job is to clean toilets, and return to the restroom to Swiffer the toilets
>>
This whole thing reads like something Andrew Hussie would make. I like it.
>>
>>36397
dont speak those words here, friend. too risky
>>
>>36397
Yeah, MSPA was my life for the last several years. I'm not sure I could make a quest any other way.
>>
>>36397
This, very Problem Sleuth-esque and I love it
>>
File: 32.gif (17KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
32.gif
17KB, 640x480px
>>33729
>>33848
>>36103
You enter the GIRL'S BATHROOM.
>>
>>36742
Better start out by checking the stalls
>>
>>36742
you won't get to mack on any sweet babes if you look like shit, check yourself out in the mirror.
>>
>>36742
Just start fucking licking the floor like a madman
>>
File: 33.gif (7KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
33.gif
7KB, 640x480px
>>36793
Looking good! (The mirror cracks a little.)
>>
>>36884
pick up and throw mirror over a stall.
>>
>>36884
Find a urinal to pee in, only to be disappointed
>>
File: 34.gif (17KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
34.gif
17KB, 640x480px
>>36800
You can't think of a better way to clean a bathroom!
>>
>>36982
puke
>>
>>36982
While you're down there, peek to see if there are any girls in the stalls.
>>
>>36982
remember the night janitor is an asshole and leave all the hard work to them.
>>
>>36982
Consider life choices up until now.
>>
>>36982
Your job is to clean the toilets not the floor. Also disregard any humans that may be above or around said toilets. Your job is to clean after all, not to be respectful.
>>
>>36982
Leave the toilet seats up, and go clean the men's bathroom.
>>
Rolled 5, 3 = 8 (2d10)

>>37447
Yesss
>>
File: 35.gif (28KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
35.gif
28KB, 640x480px
>>37243
You go to a toilet and start buffing it.
>>
>>39233
buff yourself
>>
>>39233
buff the water inside the toilet.
>>
>>39233
Use Buffer on your own arms so that your arms get buff and your strength increases
>>
Off-topic: Sorry to interrupt, but I've had good laughs at this thread. Good going, OP and anons.
>>
File: tegaki.png (16KB, 400x400px) Image search: [Google]
tegaki.png
16KB, 400x400px
>>39233
throw the RADIO into the toilet
>>
>>39352
Republican propaganda should go into the toilet where it belongs
>>
>>39233
Check stats. Check inventory.
>>
File: 36.gif (26KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
36.gif
26KB, 640x480px
>>39284
You're making a complete fucking mess.
>>
>>39526
put your face near the splashing water and let Poseidons kiss wash over you.
>>
File: 37.gif (28KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
37.gif
28KB, 640x480px
>>39352
You put your RADIO in the toilet for good measure. Sparks are flying everywhere!
>>
>>39537
>>39558
this only strengthens my will for this to happen.
>>
>>39526
leave the buffer in the toilet
proceed to the male bathrooms
>>39414
>GRANOLA STUMP FER PRESIDDANT 2K14
>REPUBESICAN
>>
>>39558
>buzz buzz
>its donald trumps butt
-
Did we ever give the person a name?
Does the high school janitor need a name?
I feel like he should have a name.
Straw poll on a name?
>>
File: 38.gif (13KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
38.gif
13KB, 640x480px
>>39563
You leave just as a small fire starts.
>>
>>39607
We left our fingerprints everywhere. Go back to clean them up.
>>
>>39607
>>39614
I agree with this anon.
Leave the fire but ctrl alt dlt those finger prints.
>>
Due to budgets cuts we have been fired.
>>
File: 1455419408524.jpg (232KB, 620x412px) Image search: [Google]
1455419408524.jpg
232KB, 620x412px
>>39414
look at this low energy post
>>
File: 39.gif (31KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
39.gif
31KB, 640x480px
>>39614
>>39627
You go back to make sure you didn't leave any fingerprints behind, since smudging everything up is unbecoming of a great janitor such as yourself. Luckily, it seems the fire will take care of it!
>>
>>42013

Welp, might as well just start crying. Too late now.

"Select all images of bodies of water such as lakes or oceans." Ha.
>>
>>42013
Seduce fire.
>>
>>42013
Check the time and see its time for lunch, leave the premise and head for the local foodjoint
>>
File: 40.gif (36KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
40.gif
36KB, 640x480px
>>42045
You pull out a BOX OF CHOCOLATES, ignoring Confucius's words of wisdom: "Man who sticks his dick in fire gets burned". At least you think Confucius said that.
>>
>>42124
go set fire to the men's room so the police can't tell what gender set the fire
muddy the waters
gotta be clever
>>
Rolled 3 (1d20)

>>42124
Leave the fire, go into nearest classroom and seduce teacher in front of class
>>
>>42241
>>42251
im sure you can set fire on the WAY to seducing the teachers!
>>
>>42124
Examine melting chocolates
>>
File: 41.gif (11KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
41.gif
11KB, 640x480px
>>42251
>>42266
You're feeling pretty efficient, so you toss an incendiary grenade into the mens' room on your way to find a HOT TEACHER.
>>
>>42591

Wait, check to see if there's anyone in there, if there is, eat the grenade. You don't want anyone seeing this.
>>
>>42604
>>42591
it too late we dont want to be caught in the blast, just go find a hot teacher before YOU become a bit too hot yourself....
>>
>>42793

I'm not satisfied until a grenade is digested.
>>
>>42591
Mistake student for teacher and subtly request sex, but be smooth. Don't want them thinking you're a pervert.
>>
>>42591
>that door sign
subtle
>>
Reflect on your life up until this point.
>>
File: 42.gif (14KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
42.gif
14KB, 640x480px
>>42793
You enter a classroom and, oh, son of a BITCH.
>>
>>43479
Confess your feelings for her.
>>
>>43479
try to strike up a conversation by twerking, thats the new trend
>>
>>43479
get angry, demand your hat back, or you wont clean her classroom!
>>
>>43479
Ask her how her day's been
>>
File: 43.gif (17KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
43.gif
17KB, 640x480px
>>43492
You offer her some slightly melted chocolate.
>>
>>43479
Attempt to solve the math problem to impress her. Try really hard not to draw a penis.
>>
>>43608
THROW
THE
CHOCOLATE
AT
HER
>>
>>43608
Successfully give her a dramatic romantic french kiss, like they do in the movies to make her swoon after being mad at us.
>>
File: 44.gif (20KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
44.gif
20KB, 640x480px
>>43563
You ask her how's it been going since the last time you tried soliciting sex from her. She readies to beat you with her COSTANZA BAT.
>>
>>43749
>>43866
>>
>>43866
Tell her the principle wants to see her. Take over teaching if she leaves.
>>
>>43866
activate the almonds


all of them
>>
>>43866

"You know baby, much as you wish to show you want to beat the ever living shit out of me, you know you don't want to. You know how I know? You're still wearing the hat. Deep down in your heart you KNOW you've fallen for me, no matter how irrational it may be. But baby, love ain't rational. Just go with the flow and enjoy the love ride."

Say that with a Barry White voice.
>>
>>43866
Politely call her a harlot, then reach for your hat.
>>
>>43866
Open battle menu.
>>
>>43866
tell her NO VIOLENCE IN FRONT OF THE CHILDREN!
>>
>>43953
I second this.
>>
File: 45.gif (11KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
45.gif
11KB, 640x480px
>>43685
You fail completely!
>>
>>43877
>>44233
>>
>>44233
>>43953
now do this to see if your drawing impresses her
>>
>>44233
explain that drawing is your penis to impress her
>>
>>44233
Pick her up and slam her ass against the spot where the penis drawing lies to pleasure her.
>>
Disguise yourself as one of the students, she'll never know.
>>
>>44233
add a flower to the penis in an attempt to sway her into pimping u
>>
File: 46.gif (22KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
46.gif
22KB, 640x480px
>>44010
You open your BATTLE MENU. What would you like to do?
>>
>>48110
Defend against the costanza bat using frog memes
>>
>>48110
->ITEM
We need to up our BAC
>>
>>48110

Successfully give her a dramatic romantic french kiss, like they do in the movies to make her swoon after being mad at us., then say >>43953
>>
File: 47.gif (60KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
47.gif
60KB, 640x480px
>>48138
You select DEFEND and ready your PEPE SHIELD. The woman can't get through!
>>
>>48110
run like the pansy you are
>>
>>43953
say this
>>
Throw your entire inventory at her. If all else fails you can strip, that'd scare anyone away.
>>
>>48205
The guy who keeps trying to shill his kiss suggestion is autistic but I think this is actually a good opportunity to plug >>43953 in.

Otherwise, >>48209.
>>
>>48205
Nows your chance, quickly counter-attack with first grade math problems to inflict a confusion status effect
>>
>>48205
Cower in fear and tell sugar mama we'll get her money we promise, just stop hitting us.
>>
>>48205
Rally the children to your defense
Children hate math and long to rebel against the tyrannical teachers
>>
>>48205
how can you be a normie and sport a pepe shield like a champ? this doesn't add up...
>>
>>48205
Just let her beat you. If you can survive a 5 story drop you can survive waiting for her to tire.
>>
>>48329
Lets be honest here, pepe is a normie meme by now
>>
File: 48.gif (53KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
48.gif
53KB, 640x480px
>>48140
While the woman is distracted, you quickly check your inventory for some alcohol. There's a lot of useless shit, like THE MONA LISA, A DVD COPY OF THE DAY THE CLOWN CRIED, and a HONUS WAGNER CARD. But what luck! You also have a 39 year old can of BILLY BEER!
>>
throw the beer at her. Who doesn't like beer?
>>
>>48377
It's not useless shit. Push her into the Mona Lisa, trapping her in the world of Da Vinci's masterpiece forever
>>
>>48377
Attempt to do a magic trick with the card.
>>
>>48377
tell her you came in the hat to startle her
when her guard is down ask her if she wants to watch the day the clown cried with you
>>
Rolled 7 (1d10)

Throw beer can as hard as you can at the ground. Make your escape in the resulting confusion.
>>
File: 49.gif (130KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
49.gif
130KB, 640x480px
>>48385
You toss the BILLY BEER at her. The woman takes massive damage!
>>
>>48724
Maybe that seduced her. The only way to be sure is to expose yourself. (blurred out of course, this is a blue board afterall).
>>
>>48724
Smash Mona Lisa over her head
>>
>>48724
Disarm her.
>>
>>48724
Sacrifice some of your hunger meter to vomit on her for massive damage!
>>
>>48724
we just knocked a teacher out, we have to get out of there and hope that she was just grading papers or something and that no kids saw us.
ABSCOND
>>
>>48724
Now that she's unconscious we need to claim our prize. Everyone knows after you win a duel you get a payout.
>>
>>48724
beat the children and steal their lunch money
>>
File: 50.gif (135KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
50.gif
135KB, 640x480px
>>48781
You regurgitate your SIDEARM, but the woman inadvertently bats it away!
>>
>>48851
Use 2 turns and charge Hyper beam
>>
>>48851
Shit yourself.
>>
>>48851
Bash her with the shield.
>>
File: tegaki.png (13KB, 400x400px) Image search: [Google]
tegaki.png
13KB, 400x400px
>>29178
here's some fan art, it is my reimagining of this scene

>>48851
i'm with the other guy, disarm her
>>
>>48851
Regurgitate the coat hanger and poke her in the eye.

Then retrieve firearm and put into inventory.
>>
Suck her dick
>>
>>48851
Turn to the class and survey their opinions of the situation at hand before formulating your next plan of action
>>
>>48307
>>
>>48851

Let's >>48756
to >>48763
seems pretty easy?
>>
>>50875
>I am Mike
A gun strikes a woman
Mike struggles with this format. He cannot exist here and stay himself. Mike moves back into the void
>>
club her with your dick
>>
>>48902
>>50894
Mike has spoken. The lady has been stricken with Mike's gun.
>>
File: 51.gif (117KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
51.gif
117KB, 640x480px
>>48763
You take the COSTANZA BAT.
>>
>>52355
Next, take her VIRGINITY, using the CONSTANZA BAT.
>>
>>52355
hit her with the Mona Lisa
>>
>>52355
place the Mona Lisa over the penis drawing. She'll really appreciate your fine taste in art.
>>
File: 52.gif (155KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
52.gif
155KB, 640x480px
>>48879
You use your PEPE SHIELD to knock her down!
>>
>>52355
jizz on the mona lisa and then use it to rub it on her to generate friction. Aquire static shock powers.
>>
>>52464
pick up the gun and hat, flee the scene
>>
>>52471
The smart route, let's do this one.
>>
>>52464
now hit her with it again to knock her out, then take her unconscious body with you. apologize to the children for robbing them of their education and probably innocence as well
>>
File: 53.gif (40KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
53.gif
40KB, 640x480px
>>52417
You're sure she'll love it when she stops being unconscious!
>>
>>52502
I'm still for taking her body with us
>>
>>52502
PICK THE HAT AND PUT IT ON YOUR HEAD
>>
File: 54.gif (41KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
54.gif
41KB, 640x480px
>>52517
You finally retrieve your HAT.

One of the students comes up to you, and starts crying about how you put up his teacher. It seems you've scarred him for life!
>>
>>52575
*beat up
>>
>>52575
kidnap him and leave the place
>>
>>52575
Kiss him and tell him it's going to be okay, then jump through the window
>>
>>52575
give him the chocolates, kiss him, and jump out the window.
>>
>>52575
tell him the spirit of mischief has passed on from you to him. one day he will be fated to do the same. Depart the scene with your prize(s) in tow. just grab the teacher man
>>
>>52575
after all this hard custodial work, you need a break
go to the teacher's lounge, or the janitor's break room to see your janitorial pals
>>
>>52575
give him a detention
>>
Make out with the mona lisa painting and make the kid watch
>>
File: 55.gif (261KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
55.gif
261KB, 640x480px
>>52615
You toss a KISS album at him, and then make your escape.
>>
>>52907
Try and use the bat as a pogo stick
>>
>>52907
Make a religion where the Bat is a God
>>
File: 56.gif (8KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
56.gif
8KB, 640x480px
>>52926
You ready the COSTANZA BAT to try to break your fall!
>>
>>53027
Wait, we forget to hit the fire alarm. Fly back inside and hit it real quick before jumping back out the window.
>>
>>53027
Contemplate calling the fire department
>>
>>53027
attack the floor
>>
>>53027
You've made quite a mess. You should find the principal and turn in your badge and gun.
>>
File: 57.gif (62KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
57.gif
62KB, 640x480px
>>53048
You attempt to attack the ground.
>>
>>53153
Find somewhere safe, and study the Wagner card for ancient knowledge to train baseball skills.
>>
File: 58.gif (26KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
58.gif
26KB, 640x480px
>>53047
Yeah, you guess the fire was TECHNICALLY your fault. You call up the fire department on your PORTABLE PHONE.
>>
>>53153
run away from the ground like a panther
>>
Drink some Soda to recover a bit of HP
>>
>>53465
Explain to the fire department that a psychotic MATH TEACHER set the school ablaze and then assaulted you with bat. Also she's destroying the mona lisa and exposing children to the devil's music. She is a menace and should be arrested.
>>
File: 59.gif (720KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
59.gif
720KB, 640x480px
>>53466
You are about to do this when a FIRE TRUCK almost runs you over!
>>
>>53803
dice+2d20
Roll 2 d20s on the groun
>>
>>53803
The situation seems to be under control. You should leave and give that prostitution thing another try. Your workplace is burning down after all.
>>
>>53803
Retrieve the Mona Lisa. That could be worth millions!
>>
Achieve your life long dream of sucking your own dick.
>>
>>53803
realize that was the wrong school and not the one you work at.
>>
>>53803
All this work must have made you hungry. Order a pizza for lunch
>>
>>55023
This
>>
>>53803
Run home, get on 4chan's new quest board and create a new quest about a normal guy calling it normal quest
>>
>>55455
hey, no recursing!
>>
File: 60.gif (76KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
60.gif
76KB, 640x480px
>>53225
This stupid card teaches you nothing! You doodle on it a little bit for wasting your time!
>>
>>55925
Eat the card
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)>>23241
>>
File: 61.gif (25KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
61.gif
25KB, 640x480px
>>56011
This is fucking disgusting!
>>
>>56112
Summon Skorne and scatter the Runestones across the Eight Realms.
>>
call donald trump
>>
File: 62.gif (21KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
62.gif
21KB, 640x480px
>>53757
You go an explain the situation to a firefighter. You tell him it's all some madwoman's fault. He awards you with a Congressional Medal of Honor for your bravery.
>>
>>56321
Pin the medal on your crotch
>>
File: 63.gif (24KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
63.gif
24KB, 640x480px
>>55455
Well, since your place of work burned down, it seems you have the rest of the day off. You return home because you just had a great idea for a thread on your favorite website, 4chan.org.
>>
>>56508
Browse /qst/ for entertaining threads while you wait for replies.
>>
File: 64.gif (11KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
64.gif
11KB, 640x480px
>>55455
>>56508
You're quite sure it will be a hit!
>>
Rolled 20 (1d20)

>>56529
browse the gay porn boards while you wait for people to reply
>>
>>56529
I would like to reply on the thread to open the door
>>
>>56551
natural faggot 20
>>
File: 65.gif (75KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
65.gif
75KB, 640x480px
>>56551
You browse /tv/, since you hear they're always talking about big guys there. You figure it must be the gayest board.
>>
Rolled 8 (1d20)

>>56575

Visit the body type thread and advertise your quest thread
>>
>>56575
Ask if the lady in the Outlander picture gets naked at any point
>>
>>56575
Turn off 4chan, it's for degenerates and homosexuals.

Go back outside and put on some makeup, a blond wig and your pimp hat. Clearly you were working the wrong angle during this prostitution attempt.
>>
>>49092
this
>>
File: 66.gif (46KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
66.gif
46KB, 640x480px
>>56738
You enter a thread and ask a pretty important question.
>>
>>56781
holy fuck didn't update for hours whoops
>>
File: 67.gif (24KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
67.gif
24KB, 640x480px
>>56788
You interpret this as a command and fail to update your quest for hours.
>>
>>56814
please make a continuation thread when this one 404's, it's literally my favorite quest so far
>>
>>56818
Maybe this weekend. I made the mistake of starting this right before finals week.
>>
>>56844
shit man why is everyone starting these during finals
>>
>>56844
Call the cops, maybe they would know how to further you past pimping endeavour! Also you forgot your hat!
>>
>>56851
Procrastination
>>
>>56851
Because the board was created during finals.
>>
>>56814
you need to check that thread for replies. hopefully somebody might have answered your question regarding that possibly nude chick
>>
>>56844
Will it just be called Normal Guy Quest again?
>>
>>57103
Probably. I'm terrible at naming things.
>>
File: 68.gif (32KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
68.gif
32KB, 640x480px
>>56864
It seems your quest is pretty divisive!
>>
>>57181
Search your home for any other rooms
>>
File: 69.gif (54KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
69.gif
54KB, 640x480px
>>57222
You enter your bedroom. Now that you think about it, you're feeling kinda tired. You did have an adventurous day after all!
>>
>>57251
time to nap.
>>
>>57251
fall into a coma safely on your bed
>>
File: 70.gif (40KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]
70.gif
40KB, 640x480px
>>57252
>>57256
You immediately crash on the floor. You can't wait to see what tomorrow's normal day will bring!

Good night!
>>
File: 1452992605533.jpg (338KB, 1200x836px) Image search: [Google]
1452992605533.jpg
338KB, 1200x836px
>>57257
(that's exactly what I was hoping for)
good night fellow quest master!
>>
>>57257
OH NO! AN ELDRITCH MONSTER!
>>
Enter dream sequence.
>>
>>57164
Make sure to do an amusing recap to trick new people into coming into the thread.
>>
Rolled 2 (1d20)

>>57257
Wake up then check your quest thread
>>
>>58318
he never woke up ;-;
>>
File: (CAN'T WAKE UP).jpg (14KB, 127x133px) Image search: [Google]
(CAN'T WAKE UP).jpg
14KB, 127x133px
>>57257
>>
Rolled 20 (1d20)

make new thread
>>
>>57257
THE QUEST MUST GO ON
Thread posts: 341
Thread images: 81


[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / bant / biz / c / can / cgl / ck / cm / co / cock / d / diy / e / fa / fap / fit / fitlit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mlpol / mo / mtv / mu / n / news / o / out / outsoc / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / spa / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vint / vip / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y] [Search | Top | Home]

I'm aware that Imgur.com will stop allowing adult images since 15th of May. I'm taking actions to backup as much data as possible.
Read more on this topic here - https://archived.moe/talk/thread/1694/


If you need a post removed click on it's [Report] button and follow the instruction.
DMCA Content Takedown via dmca.com
All images are hosted on imgur.com.
If you like this website please support us by donating with Bitcoins at 16mKtbZiwW52BLkibtCr8jUg2KVUMTxVQ5
All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties.
Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the content originated from that site.
This means that RandomArchive shows their content, archived.
If you need information for a Poster - contact them.