Chaos Quest 3: Posing edition

>>175793
Change name to Hitler the Great

Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>175793
So how about a friendly game of bball? We can learn much of each other.

Then we can get down to business. If you want to join our quest for chaos.

>>176026

You ask Dio if he's up for a friendly game of b-ball. "I am not sure what you mean" he says as you pull out DoomDunk. "Just some basketball is all" "Very well then, prepare yourself" you both go down to the basketball court and begin passing it around

The game is very lax with each of you getting in good shots and bad. Ultimately it ends with a tie "Good game" you say holding out a hand "Good game" Dio says as you both shake hands

"So with some of this out of the way, would you like to join chaos?" You ask as Dio begins hmming and pacing back and forth "I Dio shall join chaos!" He says with great gusto

What now lord?

Well I'm heading to bed, so keep rolling anons

Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>176048
Goodnight OP.

For now, let's get that forge world that was on our radar before and finally start off our black crusade to terra!

Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>176286
To battle.

>>176609
>>176286

You count up your forces and figure, it may be time to storm Terra and let it all become chaos tainted. You open up a vox channel to any and all chaos warriors

"MY BROTHERS, THIS DAY IS ONE THAT SHALL BE SEEN BY THE GODS THEMSELVES. WE WILL STORM THE WORLD OF TERRA, AND YOU SHALL WITNESS ME GRIND THE SKULL OF THE EMPEROR TO DUST BETWEEN MY FINGERS!!!" you say as cheers roar through the channel and it all becomes a chanting session

"Horus once said let the galaxy burn, I say: LET THE UNIVERSE, DIE IN FLAME!!!!" you roar out as a frenzy fills the vox channels and you and all chaos jump to Terra

What now lord?

Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>179578
Pray to the gods to give you a warp version of DIO's stand, proceed to whoop nearby ultra marines asses. the stand looks like a beefed up guardsman

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-XUxaTczYo

Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>179578
Only way I see to start this fight is to break the planet's shield with a dunk like no other. Using the wave of energy to damage near by enemy ships.

>>180789
This wouldn't be bad ether.

Rolled 24 (1d100)

>>181032
This guy gets it, rolling to slam dunk the imperial palace.

Is OP deaded?

>>183856

Sorry anons, been a big day for me so only one update. But I promise I'll be here tomorrow

>>181032
>>180789


You gather up all the strength you're able to muster. The gods bless you with some new power, you shall test it later. But now you leap from the Scourge and towards Terra.

As you speed down towards it ships concentrate fire on you, but shots keep missing you begin spinning with warp energy crackling around you "CHAOOOOOOOOOOS DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" You scream out as you slam DoomDunk right on Terra's shield.

It begins to crack apart and a shockwave annihilates the near by ships of your enemies. Terra is ready for sacking, the false emperor: shall die

What now lord

Rolled 22 (1d100)

>>184225
Have all forces be split into two fronts. One will be a naval defense group preventing any other forces from entering Terra. The other force will land on Terra and start acting as a land force to sack and destroy everything. However, the Imperial palace is ours to take with our entourage alone.

Have all our personal entourage come down with us so we can raid the imperial palace for ourselves. This includes: The Head Heretek, Our Waifus, Our personal Psyker bodyguard, Kharn, Dio, and some others I cant remember yet.

Once everyone has arrived, we storm the Imperial palace and head straight to the gates of the throne room.

See you tomorrow OP. This is gonna be good.

Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>185620
This is a very neat summary of the steps we should take. Make sure our corrupted Dark Angel is with us to storm the imperial palace.

>>185643
I feel like we should send a message to abbaddon once we reach the Palace. Something along the lines of "I TOLD YOU SO, FAGGOT. IT'S THIS EASY."

>>185656
I'm supporting we do this while storming the place

>>185656
haha, hilarious.
Thirding

>>185620

You open a vox channel and order all ships to form a defense to make sure no one else will be able to help those on Terra. The ships form up around the planet into a tightly formed defensive barrier

Next a raiding force comes down to start sacking Terra. The daemon primarchs and daemon princes all giving more than enough of a problem for the custodes and all those defending the planet. "CHAOS SHALL REIGN SUPREME!" Lorgar roars out as he keeps tearing his way through anything thrown at him and his brothers

And so your own entourage arrives soon after you give the order. Consisting of your waifus, psyker guards, Kharn, Dio, Axion, Lysydon the Harlequin, Typhus, Ahriman, Lucius, and DIO "Alright everyone, let's go and do what Abbadon, Horus and anyone else couldn't do. DEATH TO THE FALSE EMPEROR!!" You say raising DoomDunk and your sword up high

"DEATH TO THE FALSE EMPEROR!!!" They repeat as you all charge towards the palace, guarded by Custodes. You hack and slash your way through them using DoomDunk to steal their souls and at their power to your own

After nearly hours of fighting your way through the golden wretches, you have reached the eternity gate. The one thing separating you from the Emperor

What now lord?

Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>185843
time to try our newly aquired power in combination with doomdunk ball at the door

Rolled 22 (1d100)

>>185843
Knock?

>>185867
>>186086

You walk over to the eternity gate with DoomDunk in hand, you give the massive gate a light tap for a knock. And then the door bursts down to show the emperor on his throne

"Knock knock, any body home?" You ask as you step towards the emperor "Nothing to say? Well, maybe this will change your mind" you say bringing up Lucifuge

"No" a voice says as you're knocked away from the Emperor into a wall. Once you get off the wall, you see a lone custodes and all you can do is laugh. "I've killed your brothers already, their souls belong to me! What hope could you possibly have to stop me?" You ask the servant of the false emperor

"I hope to do my emperor proud" he says as he readies himself

What now lord?

Rolled 59 (1d100)

>>186155
mention the space wolves
and challenge golden banana to a game of "how many daemons can a single custodes kill?"

Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>186155
Good man. It's great to see this loyalty in a servant. Perhaps we can settle this with a simple one vs one as a sign of respect.

>>186267

You nod "I respect your loyalty! Even to a corpse" you say smiling as the Custodes groans in rage as he readies his force halberd "Silence, there is nothing you can say to make me fall to chaos"

"That's good, let's fight one on one" you say readying Lucifuge and handing DoomDunk to Macha "Good luck boss, you're gonna need it" Kharn says you nod and head over to the custodes

"Shall we get started?" "Let's" you and the custodes rush to one another and clash sword and Halberd

What now lord?

Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>186327
Beat him fair and square.

We are so close to destroying the Galaxy. So fucking close. Please, dice gods, don't abandon us now.

>>187999
>11

I guess malal makes an appearance.

>>187999

Seems the Custodes impales you on the halberd "Go long and go far traitor!" He says as he swings you off the halberd and into a wall near by the emperor

"I'm here! What did I- oh fuck" Skoti the head heretek says as he shows up just in time to see you in the wall "I'm all good" you say as you drop down shaking off "Let's get really started!" You rush at the custodes and begin slashing towards the legs

The custodes keeps blocking your attacks before jumping back and firing his bolter. Using you psyker power, you stop the bolts mid-flight and sending them flying back towards the custodes

"You're such an entertainer, here. Have some power on me" Malal says as you suddenly gain a burst in power, glowing grey "Ready for round two?" The custodes says

What now lord?

Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>188098
We end this little game. Goodnight, Custodes.

Actually, I dont think we got your name yet.

>>188110
By that I mean the custodes name.

>>188110

You knock the Custodes to the ground aiming Lucifuge down towards him "Goodbye custodes, I'll savor my time killing your emperor" but before you kill him you here something

"Haiya! Haiya! Haiyaaaaa!" And as if on cue three custodes without power armor burst in. "Kitten! What even happened to you?" "It's like this traitor was going Slannesh then Khornate on you!" Two say

"I'm fine, we just need to make sure that he doesn't defeat us. If we fall, the emperor falls, and the Imperium falls aswell" he says standing up "CUSTODES! TO ARMS!!!" Kitten says as he and the other custodes charge at you

What now lord?

Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>187999
11..

>>188005
Yeah.

Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>188156
Hmm, unfair numbers. Lets get our apprentice and Dio in to help us fight them.

Also, the emperor is probably gonna talk through his TTS device before we get to kill him. In which case, awesome.

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>>188192
>These rolls

>>188191
And forgot to update the page.

Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>188192
I'll back ya.

>>188191
>>188192

You aim you sword before you hear some words resonate in your head "za wardo" you have an idea to say it "ZA WARDO!!!" and thus time stops

"I see you have my stand" Dio says walking to you "Seems Chaos has it's ways" you say aiming your SINDRIIIIII-arm at the custodes "Want to join me in a hail of ordinance?" You ask, Dio pulls out numerous knives grinning psychotically

"It will be I, DIO's pleasure" he says as you fire your built in and Dio throws his knives before time goes back into motion. The custodes are knocked back "Not.....good....." Kitten groans out "Come Malice! I think you would enjoy seeing all this destruction!" you say

"Very well mortal, I come" he says before manifesting. He appears in the form of the ancient Terran Baphomet "Master, shall I fight these custodians?" "Go ahead Axion" Axion steps forth with his sword in hands

"ENOUGH OF THIS FUCKING BULLSHIT" an electronic voice says, "You said it my emperor" the custodian says, "IT'S TIME I TAKE THIS INTO MY OWN HANDS" the emperor 'says' as in a brilliant flash of light: The Emperor has returned

What now lord? Maybe soon to be, emperor?

Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>188323
Attack with everyone. Today, we bring down the imperium and become both Emperor AND Warmaster of chaos!

WHEN THE LIGHT STARTS CRAWLING BACK

WE SING HAIL CHAOS AND ATTACK

AS WE LEAD THE STORM OF THE WILD

WE WILL FIND OURSELVES NO MATCH

AS WE SING HAIL CHAOS AND ATTACK

AND WE FIGHT WITH THE GODS ON OUR SIIIIIIDE

HAIL CHAOS AND ATTACK!

>>188423
Also, we should DEFINITELY doom dunk the emperor in the face as the fatality. It is necessary at this point.

Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>188423
>>188432
Yup.

Making us of our psi powers to give some shielding.

>>188423
>>188440

You use your psi powers to create yourself a powerful shield against attacks both psychic and physical before you laugh and roar out

"WHEN THE LIGHT STARTS CRAWLING BACK, WE SING HAIL TO CHAOS AND ATTACK!" You say as the warriors who have come to the planet cheer in response "AS WE LEAD THE STORM OF THE WILD, WE SHALL FIND OURSELVES NO MATCH!!" The cheers grow louder

"AS WE SING HAIL CHAOS AND ATTACK, AND WE FIGHT WITH THE DARK GODS ON OUR SIDE: HAIL CHAOS AND ATTACK!!!!!" The cheers respond in kind with what you say

"I am tired of this chaos garbage" the Emperor says as you and your companions rush onto towards the emperor and his custodians. Who do the same in kind, you clash swords with the Emperor himself and with it comes a shockwave that is felt through out the galaxy

Mean while on craftworld Ulthwe, Eldrad gasps in shock and screams in agony "Father!" Ronahn says lifting his parent to his feet "What's wrong?" the son asks "It is here" Eldrad says with strain "What's here father?"

"The End Times: have come"

The final battle to decide if Chaos wins or loses has begun. What now lord?

Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>188482
Yo Juggy! We're finishing this in style.

>>188547
YES!

CHAOS DUNK THE EMPEROR!

Rolled 67 (1d100)

>>188584
Forgot to roll.

>>188547
>>188584

As you step back you hear a familiar roar from your friend Juggy, "LET THE GOOD TIMES ROLL, FOR THE END TIMES IS HERE!!!" he says with the Swarmlord following suit with a swarm of Tyranids joining in the fight against rhe custodes

"I am sorry that it has had to come to this" the Emperor says swinging his sword down on you in which you block the blow "I don't regret anything I have done" you respond in kind as you clash with the false Emperor

Mean while you psyker guards are pulling on the limbs of Karatodes "I USUALLY ENJOY THINGS LIKE THIS, BUT NOT NOW!!" Kharn, Ahriman, Lucius and Typhus are all 'playing' with Custodesi, and Juggy and the Swarmlord are fighting Wamuudes

"Just give up, there's no hope for you" Taldeer says to a bloodied Kitten who's barely hanging onto life "I am.....not.....done yet" he says as DoomDunk hits him down and bounces too you as you catch it

"Mon-keigh, we have arrived to fight on your side!" "As are we Gue'la!" two voices say, the Eldar and Tau have arrived to help the Imperium "SLANNESH SENDS HER REGARDS!!" A commander of a ship says as he and the others begin to open fire on the Eldar and Tau ships

Back on Terra you keep clashing with the Emperor before throwing DoomDunk at him. He begins be sucked through a portal, not before taking you with him. You both land in the Warp,

"WITNESS ME!" You scream out before charging the Emperor again

What now lord?

Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>188648
THIS IS OUR CHANCE! The black library book said that a sufficient psykic presence(or lack thereof one) can destroy any being. We can destroy the emperor by drawing upon the warp and using our psykic power to destroy his immortal soul, and therefore prevent him from coming back.

Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>188665
(I feel like I could add more to plans if I knew the lore better.) Non the less I will back ya and hope to end this.

>>188665
>>188834

Summoning all the power from the warp you can, you place the energy inside DoomDunk before throwing it "HALF COURT!!!" you say as the Emperor closes his eyes and whispers

"I have failed, I am so sorry my sons. And to any and all who may survive this nightmare" DoomDunk hits and an explosion can be felt from the warp and beyond. The gods feel it, the Orks, Eldad, Tyranids, Tau and even Necrons feel a change

You then begin to absorb the Emperor's essence, you start laughing and laughing and laughing "I AM THE TRUE GOD-EMPEROR OF MANKIND. LONG LIVE ME!!!" you say before returning to the Materium, the Custodes gone and your companions still there

"Hey, boss? What happened? You and the corpse emperor fought and then.....we felt something" Kharn asks as Ahriman begins stuttering in abject terror "Kharn.....h-he, absorbed the Emperor's power"

Everyone in the room flinches and kneels before you, "Well, I have a feeling Abby isn't going to be to happy~" Lucius coos "Yeah, not very happy. Not at all" Typhus says with maggots coming out from his helmet

What now, Chaos-Emperor?

Rolled 39 (1d100)

>>188886
I think the was someone we wanted to message and say it wad this easy.

Then resupply and ready for everyone to come at us.

Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>188915
>Coms
Abbaddon: "What is it? Im bu..."
Belal: "HEY, ARMLESS FAGGOT,"
>Point to our chest
Belal: "IT WAS THIS EASY."
Abbaddon: "WHAT THE FUC.."
>Cut Coms

Then do what the anon above me suggested.

Although, I think we just unleashed a whole lot of daemons on terra. BETTER TURN THIS PLACE INTO A DAEMON WORLD DEDICATED TO US!

>>189353

You open up vox comes to your favorite failure who just groans "What is it? Can't you see I'm-" "Hey you armless faggot" you send a telepathic vision of Terra right now

"It's this easy!" "WHAT THE FU-" you cut off the vox smiling in pride "Alright, resupply and and get ready for a whole lot of fighting still" you say: and when drop pods come you get a resupply of troops, then titans begin to fall in ready for fighting, and a resupply of ammo and new weapons

"Alright then, who's ready for these pathetic worms to be pushed back?" you ask as everyone cheers, the first ship breaks through. An Eldar ship

On said ship Ronahn is trying to get the ship down onto Terra "Father, do you have any idea what we may encounter?" he asks the farseer who turns his head "Nothing specific, but prepare for a fight of your life" he says as they crash the ship into the Imperial Palace

What now Emperor?

Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>190419
Now it's a good time to take a stroll on Terra and greet all our citizens that are overjoyed to have such a fine daemonically radiant almost golden new Emperor that actually can rule them. Let's hunt for stragglers

Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>190419
Show the citizens what their true emperor is capable of. Declare the formation of a new Imperium, in which humanity will sow destruction in their wake, and unite the galaxy under our iron fist, as the false emperor never did.

Show the galaxy what can be achieved with the power of Chaos.

>>191291

You step forth out from the ruins of the Eternity Gate and clear your throat before speaking for a vox channel for all the Imperium to hear

"Subjects of the Imperium of Man! I am messaging you to inform the following: your corpse emperor is gone, Terra is now taken, and a new Imperium shall be born under my rule as your emperor. So praise me! Belal the Soul Slammer, the Slayer of the False Emperor, Messiah of the Dark Gods, and the Two-Point Scourge."

The citizens of the Imperium can't even conceive the idea, their god and emperor has fallen before the hands of a madman.

"I give you a choice, you all may submit under my rule with no bloodshed. You may continue with your daily lives, but you must either revere me or the Chaos Gods. Or you will be ground under my heel and scattered to the wind like dust: Make your choice of either endless suffering, or new leadership"

The vox is cut now, you raise your hand towards the skies that are filled with the sight of Tau and Eldar ships. And with a flick of a wrist you send them back to once they came.

You are then hit with two shots right in the back, "Who strikes the true emperor of mankind?" you growl as an Eldar ranger and vindicare appear

What now emperor?

>>192298
Reach for them both then bash their skulls together, knocking them out. We will make a public display of them when we get the chance to show what happens to those who cross or defy us.

Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>192740
Forgot to roll.

Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>192740
Sounds like a plan.

Maybe we will even get a chance for some info on the other factions.

>>192740

You shrug before grabbing the two by their heads and smashing their skulls together. The two are rendered unconscious by the hits, "I'll save you two for later." you say dragging the two of them somewhere else you currently have to deal with something

"Belal, could I speak something for a moment?" Sindri says "Yes? What is it?" "Well if you're going to be playing the part of the Emperor, you'll need an advisor as well. You have any ideas who it would be?"

Who might it be emperor?

Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>195590
ARAGHAST THE LEASH OF THE LEGION,
MASTER OF HOUNDS

Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>195590
ELIPHAS, THE INHERITOR

Actually, why only one advisor? Why not a council of them? Include ELIPHAS though, that is a must.

>>195919
>>196112

You think for a moment before a light of inspiration hits you, a council! Unlike the High Lords of Terra they won't be incompetent sacks of garbage. "Well Sindri why be limited to one when I can have many?"

"Oh, going the same thing with the high lords? Very well then" Sindri says before you open up a vox channel "Alright the following people come over to the Palace: Araghast, Eliphas, Kharn, Ahriman, Lucius, Typhus, and Huron"

After about an hour everyone is standing before you "What do you need boss?" Kharn asks "Yes, what do you want?" Eliphas asks with mild annoyance

"I brought you all here because if I am to rule a new Imperium I need brilliant minds to help with it. So I ask that you all be a council of mine, you'll each help with running day to day operations ruling this empire. You may do what you please, but I will not advice treachery. Understood?" you say as the people in front of you looking at one another

"I'm up for it" Huron says, everyone else gives a variation there of says yes. "Wait! I DIO wish to join this council!" your yellow clad ally says "Go ahead" "Excellent"

What now lord?

Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>196340
Dark Angel apprentice (Axiom?) will be tasked with forming our new Custodes, which he will lead. We must rebuild the Imperium as it should have been.

Have all of our heretics try and figure out as much as they can about the Golden Throne, and when they're able, convert it into a bball hoop format rather than a chair (seeing as the new emperor will be sitting hoops and kicking ass instead of sitting around all day).

We will build humanity a new webway, from the power of the souls that Doomdunk has captured/consumed. This ensures that we must regularly shoot hope and slay foes to keep our empire alive, preventing it from becoming stale and decrepit like it's predecessor.

>>196648
Apologies for the horrible autocorrect fuckery in this post.

>>196653

"Axion!" you yell out and see your apprentice come before you and bow "Yes my master?" "I am assigning you with the task of forming new Custodes. Loyal to me, you will be in command of these new ones." for a moment Axion steps back in surprise "Thank you my master, I shall get to work right now!" he then leaves

"ALRIGHT YOU USELESS HERETICS, I WANT YOU TO FIND OUT WHAT YOU CAN ABOUT THE GOLDEN THRONE!" you say as hunched over heretics begin to analyze the throne.

And moments later a heretic comes to you "My lord, it seems the Golden Throne was like the Emperor's life support. Keeping the poor fool alive," "Of course that's obvious, what else?" "W-well! It also appears to be able to enhance psychic power, and seems that tech-priests modified it to be able to have it open to the webway"

This is great news! You can finish what the priests started and finish this....Webway Project of the False Emperor's.

So, what now emperor?

>>196653

No worries anon, and as a reminder. You have ALL the emperor's power: so if you think about making Chaos Primarchs then go ahead

Rolled 69 (1d100)

Ok last post before I sleep.

Get a status report on all our systems, see if any rebellion has happened.

After that, call the inquisition. After all, they now better work for us...

Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>197137
So we technically rival the chaos gods in power right now and we control humanitys hardest fortress planet along with a massive amount of chaos forces, clearly this is the best time to visit the chaos gods for a GODLY game of bball and then after outplaying the gods too hard get warped onto a random tau/eldar planet for no reason at all.

>>199491

Whoah.

First 100 I've seen on /qst/...

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>>199556
oh lol, just realized i rolled that

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>>199491

Round of applause everyone, one. Fucking. Hundred.

You figure that it could be a good time to play with the gods! And so via chaos/emperor bullshit you teleport to the warp where the Gods are waiting "WE WANT TO MAKE A FEW THINGS CLEAR" "You might no longer see us as your providers" "But maybe we could be friends, maybe more?" "They grow up so fast!" "Yeah. That." and so the Chaos Gods each give you a pat on the back

"Thanks, so want to play some b-ball?" You ask pulling out DoomDunk out. The gods all give their own variations of yes: this is a game of utter madness, you're ripping them apart and doing what Slannesh does to Eldar everytime

"FUCK THIS GAME!!!!" Khorne yells out as he tries shooting but you jump up, smiling smugly, then block it "RRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHH!!!!!" Khorne then storms off "This is the worst!" Malal says passing the ball to Nurgle "OH SHIT NO!" you then steal the ball from Nurgle and make a half-court shot

"I GOT THIS GUYS, IT'S ALL GOING TO PLAN. JUST AS PLANNED!!!!" Tzeentch says sounding completely tired and driven insane, trying to stop using magic "Yes! I'm about to jizz!" Slannesh says who just spent 3/4 of the match trying to masterbate: you decide to crush the hope god's very own hope by tipping the ball into the net

Belal: 900. Chaos Gods: 0

"GET THE FUCK OUT" they all collectively say, before sending you to a planet of....ok it's Tau "OH FUCK IT'S THIS GUY" a fire warrior says as he and anything within 5 miles starts unloading all they have into you HOPING it will kill you

"Good try, but umm....no" you say

What now emperor?

Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>199570
Use psychic communications to do what >>199339 said

Rolled 13 (1d100)

Surely there must be some unexplored parts of the universe, why don't we put unwanteds on some cruisers, disable navigation and just send them to unknown regions?

>>199581
>>199588

I commend you for not giving a shit that you have been hit with enough fire power to level a continent.

You use psychic power to project yourself in front of the council "Boss? Where'd you go?" Kharn asks "Played the gods at b-ball and won, and got sent to a world filled with Tau" you say as your council squints their eyes

"Yes.....it seems our lord has managed to do something amazing. Well done" Eliphas says calmly but filled with the rage of Khorne on a man-period. "Well, you obviously have need of us. What is it?" Huron asks

"Is there any rebellions going on?" You ask "Yes, all over the imperium." Araghast says pulling up a map "Loyalists are having trouble dealing with cults that are driving them out and joining us. Even then the loyalist marines are still keeping hold of the worlds they still have" "Yes, glad to hear it. Well I need to do something now, bye for now!" you say as you move your projection to an inquisitor sitting on a massive chair

"Oh. You. What do you want?" Karamazov asks with obvious distain "There's going to be changes around the Inquisition: First: the Ordo Hereticus will hunt down and make an example of any and all worshipers of the emperor, Second: The Ordo Malleus will be in charge of giving daemons a way to come to the materium, Third: you will be taking orders from Azhek Ahriman, and Fourth: the Ordo Xenos will find out more about Tyranids, and bring xenos weapons and tech to integrate to our own"

Karamazov nods hesitantly "Understood......my emperor" "Excellent, and send a ship to pick me up"

What now emperor?

>>199596

You remanifest the psychic form to Karamazov "And by emperor, I mean the useless corpse that I killed"

Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>199601
play catch the Doomdunk with the Taus while waiting for the ship to arrive, a proper guest always entertains their hosts.

Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>199601
Assassinate the Tau ethereals, and see if any of their gullible underlings want to become subjects of our empire.

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>>199880
>>199973

You figure that a game of catch should pass the time while your pick up ride comes. And so you start tossing DoomDunk around at anyone: and it seems those who manage to touch it have managed to get a taste of Slanneshi taint

They all stop what they're doing and start fucking one another. So while they do that you begin taking a stroll through out the planet for an ethereal. Lucky you! There's one in the capital of this planet

You head over to the city, throwing DoomDunk at the ethereal he ends up having a hole in his chest. The Tau around him start crying like babies, though you feel.....different. Maybe a new mutation? You head over to the Tau

"Hey, if you join me then I'll be better than the Greater Good" you say as the Tau solemnly nod. And right on time an frigate appears in the sky and lands outside the city "Ready to depart my emperor?"

What now emperor?

Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>201621
Tau are too fragile to make up any significant part of our armies, and we don't have that many. They can act as part of our new cadre of imperial assassins which I can't remember the name of, specifically as marksmen/snipers.

Rolled 55 (1d100)

>>202177
this and take a few battlesuits with you for the hereteks

>>202291
Yeah this too, our Imperium will have no bizarre superstitious qualms about learning from other races' tech.

Holy shit, how is this new Imperium (led by a Chaos Lord) more progressive, and less xenophobic than the Imperium as it was?! We've formed alliances with members of several races, we've started rebuilding the webway, we've started discovering new technologies fit the first time in 10k years, we've got a leader who leads his troops into battle to protect and expand his empire, we've put an end to the worship of false gods... I mean we're not even dependent on the Ruinous powers any more, and we've even defeated them all in a game of bball. I'm not even sure the Emperor would be unhappy with his this turned out...

Rolled 52 (1d100)

Didn't Eldrad crash into the imperial palace, by the way?

Do as the anons above me suggested and then start making plans to conquer the loyalist astartes who are trying to hold their own.

>>202177
>>202291
>>203667

You're thinking about the Vindicare anon, yeah Eldrad crashed into the palace: he's in a coma right now.

You take some of the Tau with you, mostly fire warriors and some with battlesuits. The heretics and Mechanicum would love having some Tau technology

While the Tau aren't necessarily front line fighters, the fire warriors can be the new vindicares. Once you board the frigate with your Tau, the ship returns to Terra.

You walk to the palace and see the Eternity Gate has been rebuilt: now with you holding the Emperor's severed head standing on his and and the corpses of Custodes, with your twin Eldar waifus sitting near your legs while your council is in the back ground killing more Custodes.

You open the door up and see Axion lecturing some warriors clad in grey iron and silver. "You are the Emperor's guards: you will lay down your life for him, do ANYthing for him." he says as the grey clad paladins repeat it.

Axion turns to see you, he and these new Custodes bow "Welcome back my master, I have already trained some new Custodians for your service." he says as you nod "Good my student, keep the work going" you say as you lead the Tau fire warriors to Karamazov "What are you doing with blueberries?" "I want you to train them to be like the Vindicare assassins." you say as Karamazov looks to them and then to you "I will send them to the Assassinorim for training" "Excellent" you then return back the palace

"Araghast I want you to send warriors to deal with these rebellions" you say to the Master of Hounds "I cannot do that yet my lord." "Why not?" "Even though we have SOME marines: we don't have enough to quell rebellions going around the entire galaxy with space marines controlling them" Araghast explains, he isn't wrong either

"So what are you suggesting?" you ask as Araghast leans in and whispers "Make your own primarchs and space marines"

So, what now emperor?

Rolled 36 (1d100)

>>203919
Oh
OOh
OOOOOOOHHH

Alright, if were gonna do this, we gotta do this properly. So no bullshit "oh look tzeentch stole my sons and fucked me over." We must do as much as we can to avoid the Horus heresy from happening to us. We're gonna keep a good eye on our kids and make sure they grow up the way we want them to.

First things first though, we start building a laboratory for our kids to be made in. Check the black library to see if there is a way to block out the reach of the chaos gods so they can't take the kids while they are in development. If we find such information, we apply it to the lab and tubes. Next, gene seed. Third, set guard routines around the lab.

Once that is done, we go to our prison cells and check on our vindicate and eldar prisoners. Time we start extracting info before we make an example of them. Who knows, maybe even have LIVI be the captain of our assassin squads.

Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>204056
Agreed, our creation of new primarchs and third founding will learn from the mistakes of the first. We must first search for a way to hide or protect the entire project from the Chaos Gods.

Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>204204
just conduct the project inside the black library? Surely that place should be warded against anything trying to just snatch stuff

>>204222
Ideally we want somewhere not just protected against people snatching them, but also against any form of interference or corruption. Also we managed to steal literally everything from the Black Library, so my respect for their security has dropped quite a lot.