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Generic Fantasy Quest

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So, you're an inhabitant of some fantasy world somewhere in some universe where evil shit is happening. A long time ago, your world was in the clutches of chaos and disorder. Bandits would regularly steal people's shit, dragons would roast people and then steal their shit, and your civilization was like some third-world shithole. But then, the great hero Pyre brought order to the land with his 8 disciples. Dragons were slain, bandits incarcerated, and the world advanced in infrastructure and technology. Unfortunately, Pyre was a major pompous asshole, and he only wanted to save the world so that he could rule everyone with an iron fist. Thus, the world became orderly, but under the rule of a fell and terrible monarch.

What do you have to do with any of this?

Well, you're some random adventurer who's fed up with Pyre's bullshit mandates and shitty laws. You want to kick his shit in, but in order to defeat him, you must grow stronger by collecting the 8 magical Macguffins of light. Before you can do that, who are you?

What is your
>Race?
>Gender?
>Class (Mage, Rogue, or Fighter)?
>>
>>158081
human
>>
>>158081
Undead
>>
>>158081
Female
>>
>>158081
male
>>
>>158081
Rogue
>>
>>158082
>>158085
>>158086
>>158087
>>158091
Keep all three categories in one post.
>>
>>158081
Higher elf futanari "Lilliana"
>>
>>158081
male
human rogue
>>
Kobold
Male
Fighter
>>
>>158093
Oh, right, mage.
Higher Elf
Futanari
Mage
>>
Undead
Male
Rouge
>>
>>158093
>>158096
Second
>>
>>158096
Third
>>
>>158096
>meme character
>>
>>158081
Chameleon man
Male
Mage
>>
>>158081
Naga
Male
Rogue
>>
Lel ded quest faggot OP
>>
>>158214
I'm doing this by popular vote.

So far, the MC will be a rogue
>>
>>158123
>anally ravaged normie
>>158093
Fourth
>>
>>158143
Second
>>
>>158143
This
>>
>>158081
Female mimic rogue, named Boxie.
>>
>>158096
Fifth
>>
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>>158096
You are a Higher Elf from the forests of redwoods!

You started adventuring at age 14, and you are now 16. You have an estranged relationship with your parents, because you have a PENIS despite being a girl, and they accused you of practicing dark magic.

Your name is Liliana, and you are an elemental mage who is also an aspiring rogue. You stand at 6 ft 7 in, but you cannot take a hit to save your life. Your magical prowess is fantastical, but you're pretty shitty at fighting and blocking.

You've recently arrived at the bustling city of Oreholm, located in the country of the Unions of Drakes, where most days citizens squabble among themselves at the local open-air market where they buy and sell crops and livestock.
A kind family allowed you to stay at their home, but today is the day you must leave for the capital city of Crystalheights to collect one of the eight magical Macguffins.

What do?
>Check the map behind you
>Go study some magic
>Head outside to the open air market
>Pickpocket someone's coin
>Go to the bar to get some allies
>Go outside and slap someone in the face with your dick
>>
>>158314
go to bar
and then slap someone with your dick so you have a gang to back you up
>>
>>158314
see >>158343
>>
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>>158368

You head on over to the local pub so you can hire some muscle to build a gang. The bar bustles in the middle of the day, bards singing, people yelling, people fighting, and people having sex in the restrooms. You sit down at the counter, eyeing some potential party members suspiciously.

"What do you want?" the bartender asks.

"Just a mug of Elven beer."

While waiting for the bartender to deliver you your drink, you watch the others at the counter.

"Here you go." says the bartender. "Enjoy."

What will you do?
>Flirt with the bartender
>Strike up a political conversation with the human bard
>Talk about beer with the Dwarven Axeman
>Flirt with the kobold peasant
>Talk to the elven spearmen over there
>Talk to the mean-looking orc mercenary sitting two seats over
>>
>>158454
>>Flirt with the bartender
>>
>>158454
Talk to the orc.
>He'll know what's what
>>
>>158454
>Strike up a political conversation with the human bard
we need buffs to increase our dick size
>>
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>>158476
After a small amount of time, you find an empty seat next to the orc.

"Hey, are you sick of Pyre's bullshit?" you ask him.

He stares back glumly, and you notice one arm is missing.

"You aren't going to beat him." he replies, staring at his scarred and cut hand.

"How do you-"

"You aren't going to get the first Macguffin." he cuts in. "You have no chance against Sarkany the dragon man. He'll cut you down, like he did to my party. I was lucky enough to escape with my life."

You wonder what fearsome beast could do this to such a muscular, towering orc and his band of mercenaries. You stare at your mudstone mug, afraid to say anything.

The orc looks back at you.

"If you really want to throw your life away, you should know that Sarkany hates Rocs and what they do. By the way, my name is Jorj."

Jorj turns away.

"You're a big guy." you comment.

"For you."

What next?
>Talk to the elven spearmen, happily chatting away in the corner
>Flirt with the bartender
>Flirt with the kobold peasant
>Flirt with the bartender
>Strike up a conversation about politics with the human bard
>>
>>158547
re-roll this one
>>
>>158571
How about we show our crotch bulge to the bard instead, who will sing of the lady with the dong and attract adventurers from far and wide?

Failing that, flirt with kobold.
>>
>>158571
its been an hour qm get that dick out of your mouth and start writing
>>
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>>158820
You waltz over to the bard, still singing about birds or dragons or some shit.

"You wanna see something?" you say.

The bard, still performing glances at you quickly, and spies a large bulge in your pants.

"MY GOD." he yells, dropping his guitar on the ground. A crowd gathers at the sight of your cock.

"My, my! she's as hung as a stallion!"

"Mommy, is she a tranny faggot or a grill?"

"Dark magic...."

The bard clears his throat and pukes all over the floor. Between coughs and gasps, he manages to force out a sentence of admiration.

"You must be the chosen one!" he exclaims, choking on a kernel of half-digested sweetcorn.

"The chosen one?" you ask.

"You're the one who's destined to stop Pyre and rule the world!!"

"Wait, does this mean that... I can defeat his 8 disciples and obtain the magical Macguffins?!"

"Yes! The prophets of old foretold a beacon of light, one who could defeat Pyre and save the world! They said that the girl endowed with the power of a man would be the one. I can't believe it! Almost 300 years under darkness, and we've finally found the hero!"

What Next?
>Recruit the bard
>Take off your pants and do a helicopter with your dick
>Talk to the other adventurers to build a small band
>Something else (write in)
>>
>>158888
recruit the bard
>>
>>158888
>Recruit everyone there as cannon fodder.
>>
>>158888
Cockslap bard to assure complete dominance over him.
>>
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>>158913
You now have a huge crowd as your party. Everyone in the bar thought you were some special snowflake hero or something, so they recruited themselves. Forcefully. You have a bigger problem on your hands than any sissy dragon fighter or whatever you have to fight.

The plus side is that most of them will die on your journey which will provide a plentiful food source in the mountains. Now, the difficult part is weeding out the peasants and keeping the battle-worn soldiers.

What will you do?
>Gas them using your toxic gas spell (it's actually mustard gas)
>Go find a titan or some shit
>Go into the desert foothills on your journey to Crystalheights
>Rape and murder all who you deem "unfit"
>>
>>158913
Second this
>>
>>158983
Go into desert foothills
>>
>>158983
>Find a titan
>>
>>158983
Rape and murder.
Go full dwarf fortress, become master spellcaster
>>
>>159015
*adventure mode
>>
>>158983
go into desert
>>
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>>159015
You start your daily magic practice with your live targets. Every single spell is practiced: SS gas++, Firaga, Thunder, Earthquake, Twin Towers, and Cumshot+. Any one who didn't die on impact was anally and orally raped. When the dust cleared, there was no one left, but a golden-helmed knight in a business suit. You were about to unleash another Cumshot+ and tear him open, but his resilience in surviving your magical onslaught was extraordinary, so you decided to spare him.

"Hi!" said the knight.

"I'm Mr. Exposition, the guy who gives you tutorials and delivers informational monologues to advance the plot! I'll be going on an adventure with you, whether you like it or not!"

You are fed up with this guy's bullshit already, so you loose a Thunder spell. Mr. Exposition's helmet effortlessly absorbs the shock like some kind of lightning rod. You cast another spell, but you're out of mana.

"Oh, no!" he exclaims. "It looks like you're out of-"

"Yes, I know."

This guy seems like some sort of stalker faggot, but he won't be around for long. Hopefully he'll be maimed and killed in the Dunes of Despair.

>-300 Karma

What next?
>Keep on pressing into the Dunes of Despair
>Buy a train ticket to go through the desert (You'll lose xp)
>Take the shortcut through the Mire of Misfortune, where Swamp Titans and Toxitoads live in harmony killing foolish adventurers together
>Establish some rules with Mr. Exposition to maintain your sanity
>Rape him with your feminine penis.
>>
>>159112
>no graphical rape and gore
Dammit.

Establish some rules with Mr. exposition, he could he a good meat shield.
>>
>>159112
oh god it's the DMPC, DM will probably kick us out of his house if we try to fuck with him too much

just buy a train ticket through the desert, maybe we'll meet some qt on the train
>>
>>159112
Train. Take the train.

Accost passengers until one is sufficiently enamored with your crotch bulge.
>>
>>159128
"Alright, Mr. Exposition. You can travel with me wherever the adventure leads us to," you say, pinching the bridge of your nose in frustration.

Mr. Exposition instantly lights up and almost says something but you cut him off.

"As long as you can promise to keep the talking to a minimum. This means that I'm skipping the goddamn tutorial."

"So, we'll go and defeat Pyre and his minions. But first, we're gonna need a train ticket."

What next?
>Hop on to the train illegally
>Threaten the conductor
>Steal someone's coin
>>
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>>159213
Forgot pic
>>
>>159213
earn for it properly as a stripper
>>
>>159213
or a poledancer, i heard it's classified as sport now
>>
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>>159234
Instead of doing just that, you instead jump onto an empty train car like a hobo. After a day, the steam-powered train stops at a towering cluster of crystal buildings. Light reflects off of the multi-faceted towers like sunlight on a mirror. Strangely enough, the city is completely empty. Unlike Oreholm, Crystalheights is barren, barring the beautiful architecture.

"Where to?" asks Mr. Exposition.

A sign nearby reads:
"Crystalheights- Where fantasy becomes daily life."

The city seems as dead as this thread, but you're determined to find that Macguffin.
>>
>>159414
you decide you're spent after the long day and look for some adequate accommodation
>>
im tired goodnight
>>
>>159491
seeya
>>
>>159414
dont worry im still here bby
>>
>>159635
rip thread is kill ;_;
>>
>>159699
pshawww
>>
>>159699
where' teh next steppu!!!???
>>
>>159455
I second this.
>>
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> mfw no thread.

You heard OP folks, the thread is dead. Give up and go home.
>>
>>159833
pshaaaaw
>>
Please post more op
>>
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>>159819
The thing is, you're pretty tired, but there's no place to rest. The streets are deserted, the buildings barren, and there's basically not a single sign of life in the beautiful sea of crystals.

"Hello there, Liliana." a low voice booms.

"Wha-"

"Up here, filthy adventurers."

You look up and see a dragon with shimmering scales of silver. He casts a cruel and crooked smile down at you from his roost atop a tall crystal tower.

"I know you're here for the Macguffin. Word spreads fast, you know."

"You're Sarkany, aren't you?!" Mr. Exposition shouts.

"We're here to end your tyrannical grip on the Unions of Drakes!"

"Try as you might, heroes, but all attacks bounce off my shiny and fabulous hide. My secret? A bath in molten steel. Anyone who challenges me dies. If you desire to kill me and take the magical Macguffin that I possess, you should at least upgrade those puny weapons of yours to something not copper." Sarkany perches on his roost, smiling smugly at you.

"It's not like you'll even get to fight me. My guards will do the trick."

Just then, a squad of 3-4 lightly-armored soldiers spring from the shadows. The leader, a goblin, scowls at you menacingly, his steel spear glinting in the light of the crystals.

"Good luck," muses Sarkany as he lifts off and glides away.

What do?
>Cast magic at the guards
>Distract them with Mr. Exposition
>Bum rush them
>Grapple with them and take their spears (pretty damn risky)
>Throw rocks at Sarkany
>>
>>159906
>Distract them with Mr. Exposition
>>
>>159906
> Throw Mr. Exposition at Sarkany
>>
>>159906
>>Distract them with Mr. Exposition
>>Throw rocks at Sarkany

>>Bum rush them+>Cast magic at the guards
>>
>>159906
start fucking mr.exposition
use the force of your cum to shoot exposition into sarkany
>>
>>159906
>something not copper
I call that bluff, the dragon is weak to copper
>>
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>>159946
"Mr. Exposition!" you yell. "Fight for the cause!"

"I will!" he yells back.

Mr. Exposition hurls himself at the enemy, arms flailing, heart full of passion.

He is promptly skewered by the spearman.

All the while, you readied a magical blast of poison which you cast at the enemy immediately. The spearman blocks the gas and charges at you. You quickly dodge to the side, but he catches you in the hand, severing two fingers and some of your palm. Oh well. At least he didn't get to your vitals.

He quickly turns around, slashing wildly with the spear. You fall back, your head hitting the hard ground.

"Why are you fighting?!" you plead.

The soldier grows silent.

He hesitates.

"It's because Sarkany has my wife hostage in his tower. If I betray him, he'll kill her."

"But we can kill Sarkany together! You're one of the best spearmen I know!"

He plunges the spear into your heart. Pain fills your whole body... but the shot is blocked by your mutilated hand! So, you didn't die. But you've lost use of a hand now.

What now?
>Convince the guards to give up and join you
>Sucker punch the spearman in his crotch
>Roll to the side
>Seize his spear with your good hand
>Cast a bolt of lightning at him
>>
>>160066
> Cast lightning bolt on his crotch.
>>
>>160066
Napoleon Bonaparte that shit and convince the guards to join your cause. High elfs have high Charisma they could easily talk them into joining you.
>>
>>160066
so he's dead?
>>
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>>160104
"Please!" you beg.

"Don't kill me! I know your wife!"

"No you don't!" he screams in frustration.

"Her name is... uh.... Ana!" you stutter.

"It can't be..." the guard mutters. He lowers his weapons. His angry expression fades from his visage.

"Then where on her body is her birthmark?!" he asks as he once again raises his weapons, a scowl forming.

"Uhhh..... On her left buttock! 45 degrees from her spine!" you stammer.

"I don't believe it." He stares at you in disbelief.

"You are... one of her friends?"

"Uhh....yeah! I used to hang out with your dad's wife's son, remember?"

The goblin spearman straps his spear to his back as he turns toward his allies.

"Boys, we're going to kill Sarkany."

He turns back to you.

"My name is Robert and the other two are John and Garm. Welcome to the team." Robert lends you a hand, and you rise to your feet.

"Hey! I'm still alive!" Mr. Exposition yells. He somehow seems to be fully healed. "It's a healing potion," he remarks. "So I can continue to fight for the cause!"

Goddammit.

What now?
>Storm Sarkany's tower
>Sneak in
>Bombard his tower with poison gas
>Negotiate with Sarkany
>Tell Mr. Exposition to fuck off
>>
>>160240
> Get Railroaded by the QM
>>
>>160264
Sorry about that. I'll didn't realize I was railroading before you pointed that out.
>>
>>160270
> Accept QM's apology while flusteredly telling him to suck a dick.
>>
>>160240
> Sneak in using Robert to smuggle you inside, then smother Sarkany with a pillow; killing him in his sleep.
>>
>>160290
this but rape him before you smother him
>>
>>160311
No.
After.
>>
>>160313
No.
Rape WHILE smothering.
>>
>>160290
>>160330
this
>>
gotta go see you tomorrow
>>
>>160419
later op
>>
>>160419
you better be
>>
>>160419
Get yourself a tripcode before you need to start a new thread.
>>
brgrlHlrlargvvvl!
>>
BLLAAGGA
>>
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>>160290
Robert hands you his uniform as you enter the door of the crystal tower, he and his squad drenched in shadows nearby.

"Hello." says the doorman, not suspecting a thing.

You waltz on in. You asked for direction, not knowing where Sarkany was. After a short time, you come upon a regal entrance way, guarded by two burly soldiers.

"What're you here for?!" they say, blocking the entrance.

"I'm here for his....uuuhhhhhh....." you rustle around in the uniform pocket, pulling out some silver coins. "..I'm here to contribute to his....loot pile! All dragons have one!"

"Fair enough!" the left guard says.

You enter the bedroom, a vast mound of gold. On top of it stands a solitary bed, with Sarkany sleeping on it. You waste no time in smothering him with a pillow, as you rape his scaly asshole with your futa cock. What a fucking pompous asshole. Of course you could beat him!

What Next?
>Look for the first Macguffin under the bed
>Dive into the gold pile, just because you killed Sarkany and that's cool as fuck
>Look for the Macguffin under the pile of silver
>Look into Sarkany's wardrobe
>>
>>162176
Look for the weird-named thing. Where ever. Under the bed.
>>
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>>162203
Victory Fanfare!!!!

You have obtained the first Magical Macguffin and this makes you 1/8th of the way to kicking Pyre's shit in!! A harsh and grating victory fanfare blasts into your ears as a large banner reads:

"END OF ACT I"

Congratulation! You are Winrar!

Unfortunately, you still have to get out of the tower. Just because you picked up some legendary dick-shaped medallion does not mean that you're out of harm's way. You still remember that there are still in fact heavily-armored guards at the door, and the victory fanfare, although the bedroom door blocks sounds, probably alerted some guards to your location.

How will you escape?
>Hid in the loot pile
>Hide in the wardrobe
>Hide under the bed
>Stand by the door and ambush the guards that pass
> Try to channel the power of the first magical Macguffin
>Run through the crowd of guards, hoping they don't notice you
>Try and rescue Robert's wife to bring up that Karma
>Go nuclear and try to create as many corpses as possible
>>
Rolled 5 (1d8)

>>162243
>You feel intimidated by all the possible options and their possible outcomes. You panic and pick one at random. Dice roll decides which.
>>
>>162243
...and it's actually the option you felt inclined towards initially
>>
>>162243
> Try to channel the power of the first magical Macguffin
> Try to channel the power of the first magical Macguffin
>>
>>162243
>>162356
Fuck the second one was supposed to be
>Try and rescue Robert's wife to bring up that Karma
>>
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>>162356
You channel and channel and channel.....

New Power Obtained!
You have created a healing muffin! This power heals up your stamina, but can only be used once every thirty minutes.

Fucking shit power.

Oh well.

Where to?
>Hide
>Ambush guards
>Observe what's around you; find a map or some shit!
>>
>>162243
>secret option
>disguise as sarkany
>>
>>162376
Hide in sarkany
>>
My god this story is too much XD
>>
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>>162385
>>162383

The guards burst through the bedroom door.

"Hmmm??" You say, donning the severed head of Sarkany the dragon.

"What is the matter, my slaves?"

"Uhh... Sarkany...sir. We were alerted by a trumpet fanfare. We think someone has stolen the Macguffin," a guard sheepishly says.

"I assure you, guards, nothing has been stolen. What you just heard is me practicing my trumpet skills."

"Jesus..." whispers another guard. "That sounded fucking awful."

"But you don't play the trumpet!" A muscular guard exclaims. "You're a dragon."

You pause for a minute. "Shut the fuck up before I melt you with my fire."
>>
How can a dragon have a gold pile but not a trumpet?
>>
>>162418
Trumpets aren't usually made of gold. Also, lizards do not have lips and therefore cannot buzz into a bell.
>>
>>162426
Good point
>>
>>162412
order the guards to take all of the gold and valuables and deposit it outside.
>>
Aren't we wearing a severed head? I think we should play it safe and order them to abandon posts for dinner.
>>
>>162515
>play it safe
is this your first time on /qst/?
>>
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>>162499
You order them to take all the loot to the outside of the tower and put it on horse-drawn wagons. If you've slain a dragon, you better get your reward. Hopefully this will keep them busy.

With all of the guards hauling the loot outside, where will you go?
>Go to the top of the tower
>Go to its lobby
>Go to the basement
>Go to its gas chambers
>Check in the wardrobe
>>
>>162580
lets check in the wardrobe
>>
>>162518
Somewhat.
Doesn't hurt to try.
>>
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You check the wardrobe. It's completely empty, except for a woman who is gagged and blindfolded. Ok.

You untie the woman.

"Who the hell are you?" she screams.

"Shhhh!"

"Is your name Ana?" you ask.

"No!" she replies, looking around.

"Are you one of them?" she asks you.

"One of what?" you reply.

"I used to work for Pyre, but I hated him, so I betrayed him. I was going to be executed today, but you apparently killed Sarkany so I won't die yet."

What will you do next?
>"Tell me about Pyre- why does he wear the mask?!"
>Lead her out of the tower
>Tell her to stay put- Look for Robert's wife
>Look for Ana in the gas chambers
>Look for her in the basement
>Go to the top of the tower and look for her
>>
>>162925
option 6 - tower top
>>
>>162925
plus option 3 I guess
>>
Ded thread
>>
>>162925
> Enslave this new woman with a binding ritual and make her your new butler. Then find the Ana at the top of the tower.
>>
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>>162942
You sneak up to the highest point of the tower, where you find a meager room guarded by a small, worn door. You silently open it.

Inside, you find a young goblin woman, tied up but not gagged.

"Are you Ana?" you ask.

"Yes. Are you here to rescue me..?" the girl responds.

"Yep, I am. I know your husband. Why do you have a quarter to yourself?"

"Well, my husband's the captain of Sarkany's guard, a high-ranking position. I recently heard Sarkany talking about a hero, so he tightened security on my quarters, tying me up, because he must've been expecting you this whole time. So, since you're up here..... I take it that Sarkany's dead?"

"Yeah, but his guards remain, so we should be careful." you whisper

"Oh right. We can just barge out now because once the others know Sarkany's dead, they'll just leave because most of them were enslaved by him anyway."

"Wait, really?"

What do?
>Steal one of Sarkany's trumpets and blast out to the world that he's dead
>Present the guards Sarkany's head
>Strip naked, run down the halls and scream "SARKANY IS A FAGGOT CRUSHED UNDER MY FOOT LIKE A WORTHLESS SLUG!!!!"
>Take Sarkany's body, using it as a surfboard and surf down the stairs
>Punch the nearest guard in the face and tell him the news
>Run into the dining hall and throw a huge orgy party in celebration of this grand milestone
>>
>>164486
Orgy party
>>
>>164486
yeah lets throw an orgy
>>
File: tegaki.png (14KB, 400x400px) Image search: [Google]
tegaki.png
14KB, 400x400px
I should really end it here for today. See you all tomorrow.

Sorry for the lack of activity today. Not a whole lot of people were on
>>
>>164486
don the dragon head, go get the other girl, this one take with you, retrieve some nice bits from the loot, walk out without a word
>>
File: loot.png (124KB, 900x900px) Image search: [Google]
loot.png
124KB, 900x900px
>>166602
You don the head of Sarkany again as you make your way down the stairs, Ana following close behind you. You stroll into Sarkany's bedroom where the other girl lies, still tied up. Hoisting her onto your shoulder, you walk outside to where the loot is, all on a horse-drawn wagon.

You rummage through the pile and find a pair of neat shades, which you immediately put on.

The guards all look confused. Robert still hides in the shadows, with a triumphant look on his face. With one hand, you awesomely wave off Ana to once again join her husband. A wave of joy overcome all the guards, their sudden realization hitting them.

Finally, your work is done here. You ride off into the golden sunset, off to find another explore new lands and find new Macguffins.

Also Mr. Exposition tags along, but he sucks and isn't as cool as you.

Where do you go?
>The Caves- Very close by
>The Wasteland- Somewhat far away
> The Jungle- Half a day's travel
> The Ancient forest- Far Away
> The Mysterious Peaks- Very Far
> The Haunted Ruins- Extremely Distant
> The Polar fields- Far, far, far, far away.
>>
Let's lose Mr Explosion in the forest
>>
File: main_character.png (231KB, 900x900px) Image search: [Google]
main_character.png
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>>167528
You head the way of the forest.

"Oh, silly!" says Mr. Exposition. "You can't get rid of me! Main characters can't die!"

"I'll be with you FOREVER."

Where will you go?
>The caves
>The wasteland
> The jungle
>The mysterious Peaks
>The haunted ruins
>The polar fields
>>
>>167646
The jungle
>>
File: jungle.png (202KB, 900x900px) Image search: [Google]
jungle.png
202KB, 900x900px
>>167657
After a half day's travel, you and Mr. Exposition arrive in a dense jungle with your cart full of gold.

"Hulululu?" a native incoherently babbles.

There seem to be chocolate humans around here. They would be delicious, but they smell like shit and cannibalize their relatives while fornicating with them, which is something you don't approve of. Nevertheless, you must press on in finding that Macguffin, no matter what.

What do?
>Ask the locals about the Macguffin
>Form a Kool Kids Klub and terrorize the shit out of them
> Try their local delicacies. (If post number ends in a 4 or 5, you will be given a new magical power, 6 or 7, you will shit yourself, anything else will result in a seizure and possible death.)
>>
>>167657
seconding this, but buy some new equipment and find new party members on the way
>>
>>168173
LETS PUT IT ALL ON LOCAL DELICACIES
CHECK THIS 5
>>
>>168173
>Try their local delicacies
>>
oh dear
>>
>>168173
You should fornicate the human part of the loot, she's gonna totally fall for your few-tah deeq n' other charming qualities of your hero self.
>>
File: shit.png (132KB, 900x900px) Image search: [Google]
shit.png
132KB, 900x900px
>>168196
You try the Jungle special "Fried Relative Genitals with a side of Feces."

Unfortunately, this causes you to shit yourself and lose over half your body's water content. Violently.

What Next?
>Drink your own piss
>Eat the liquid shit off of the floor
>Eat your own semen
>Stab a local and drink their blood
>>
>>170213
Drink your own piss
>>
>>170213
>Drink your own piss
>>
>>170213
>Stab a local and drink their blood
>>
>>170213
> Stab a Local and piss in their mouth.
>>
>>170213
Drink your own piss
>>
Part 2 when?
>>
>>170213
>Eat your own semen
Thread posts: 140
Thread images: 25


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