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Anonymous
Vampire Hunter adventure thing, part 2 2017-05-15 05:44:04 Post No. 1463187
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Vampire Hunter adventure thing, part 2 2017-05-15 05:44:04 Post No. 1463187
[Report] Image search: [Google]
OH SHIT NIGGER(s) it's an adventure about killing vampires n shit.
4 vampire hunters is going to infiltrate a vampire castle to kill the head vampire there for casting a spell than kept the world at perpetual night time.
Each hunter needs at least 1 player to be the voices in their head to tell them what to do n shit.
Just name yourself something with the highlighted title under the hunter to identify which team you're going with. Example: Regular Hunter Faggot -> Controls Oswell the regular Hunter
Need at least 1 player for each dude
Currently the party is snooping around the servant quarters where the vampires keep the ghouls.
Previous threads:
http://pastebin.com/sR3G3F2A
https://www.mediafire.com/folder/ici3zlnn9ytyy/ADVENTURES
>>
>>1463187
start callin out vampires and call them faggots
>>
>>1463187
Go check another ghoul room while the others are still rebooting.
Sorry if my spelling is wacky . I'm wearing gloves.
>>
>>1463216
There aren't any vamps. They all upstairs.
>>
>>1463217
switching to Axeman
>>
>>1463187
Am I alive? Did offering worked?
>>
>>1463231
I think you are just a gushing blood, but thats ok you have alot of blood
>>
>>
>>1463244
no just so we have more characters in play
>>
>>1463231
I dunno. Do you feel alive?
>>1463217
Roll 1d10 for checking
8-10: Empty room but may have loot
3-7: Ghouls
1-2: An alarm
>>
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>1463274
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>1463274
I wonder what's in here.
>>
>>1463306
It's a good thing it was my roll.He's gonna take the one anyway
>>
>>1463306
>>1463311
Jospeh tries to butt in, but Oswell pushed him away.
Opening the door, Oswell found a room with no enemies.
>>
>>1463343
Search it. Surely they wouldn't leave a room empty for no good reason.
>>
>>1463352
Roll 1d10 to search for loot
8-10: Phat Loot
5-7: okay loot
2-4: meh loot
1: nothing
Perhaps you can also findpeople to populate this dead thread
>>
>>1463343
complain to the other hunters
"oswell pushed me!"
>>
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>1463394
Hmm... methinks this brick jutting ever so slightly from the wall hides something!
>>
>>1463274
after some consideration I can say that I do indeed feel alive,especially when I get some talk with my employer
>>
>>1463413
Yes. A single coin.
>>1463401
Your complaint falls on deaf ears.
Because there's nobody to listen to it
>>
>>1463439
What our mission again? To cleave evil?
FInd some evil to cleave
>>
>>1463439
Flip the coin. Make your bet now, orc. I wager this brick I pulled from the wall. Heads or tails?
>>
>>1463439
chop the evil too
>>
>>1463449
>>1463457
Roll 1d10 to find evil
3-10: Found some evil
1-2: Found too much evil
>>1463455
Coin flipped. Heads or Tails?
>>
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>1463469
>>
>>1463474
found some dlc that we have to buy to continue the game
>>
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>1463469
EVIL WHERE ARRREEE YOUUUU
>>
>>1463469
TAILS!
>>
>>1463484
aw fuck
>>
>>1463484
>>1463474
Your noisiness alerted the ghouls.
All 30 of them.
>>1463489
Oswell chosen tails, what do the others choose?
>>
>>1463518
Ask the ghouls what they pick! We know they like to gamble, they were playing cards.
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>1463518
is there a place where we can fight them in more moderate amounts? like corridor
>>
>>1463518
start head chopping
>>
>>1463518
choose heads
>>
Rolled 2, 8, 3, 10, 9, 3, 2, 6, 4, 7, 9, 1, 10, 10, 9 = 93 (15d10)
>>1463526
>>1463533
Sure, we could try any of th->>1463538
Nope too late, the axeman engaged them in battle.
And since all the ghouls have higher speed than Joseph. They get to attack first.
Half of them will now jump and dogpile his ass
Axeman roll 15d10 to defend against 15 ghouls jumping at him
They have a bonus of +6 speed.
While Axeman has +4 speed
Each failed defense roll means a HP lost
>>
>>1463586
Well fuck. Can I cleave them now too Or I need to wait my turn?
>>
>>1463586
I toss a flash in front of gar to blind them all.
>>
>>1463586
Jump in to help out Joseph
>>
>>1463586
also rip axeman, can I help him?
>>
Rolled 10, 3, 4, 1, 5, 4, 3, 7, 10, 6, 8, 4, 3, 2, 8 = 78 (15d10)
>>1463586
time for some choppin'
>>
>>1463593
You're the slowest, so ya need to wait.
>>
>>
>>1463620
chopping bad guys
you should have been here earlier
>>
>>1463627
And you should be less of a dumbass
>>
>>1463639
well now we can't always ask for miracles all the time.
>>
>>1463650
This is why Orcs are even bigger faggots than barbarians
>>
>>1463658
now no need to be angry boss
since we rolled low I expected you to fuck us over anyways. Just believe in my tactics... in getting more people to participate.
>>
And so the other 3 hunters jumped in anad managed to hold off 15 out of 30 ghouls.
While the other 15 ravaged Joseph to 0 HP
>>
>>1463670
rest in peace, orcs are fucking faggots that get us killed
OP, get me to character creation now
>>
>>1463670
is it the same way with adventure thing? we can get a revive?
>>
>>1463670
Try to escape to nearest corridor to not be overwhelmed as Joseph
>>
>>1463670
Toss a fucking smoke and hightail it out of there. You assholes can come along if ya like.
>>
>>1463670
Avenge Joseph by charging at the other 15 ghouls, furiously thrusting ahead
>>
>>1463681
god damn it, how about you switch to another team
you clearly can't make smart decisions
>>
Rolled 8, 5, 9, 10, 1, 5, 6, 4, 1, 10, 7, 10, 3, 3, 9 = 91 (15d10)
>>1463692
>>1463696
>>1463698
While the other 2 hunters slipped into another corridor, Horace furiously charged at the ghoul in speedy fury
Roll 15d10
You have +10 Fast
Ghouls have +6 Sped
>>
>>1463720
rip horseface
>>
>>1463710
get into the thread faster next time and this wouldn't happen.
>>
>>1463710
Dude, chill. Last adventure we did I was on a team with GAR, and he got our character killed too. Then he got the one after that stuck inside a jar as a brain.
>>
Rolled 3, 7, 7, 5, 10, 4, 5, 4, 3, 10, 8, 2, 9, 4, 7 = 88 (15d10)
>>1463720
Ghoul kebabs for Joseph
>>
>>1463720
so wait, we can't make a new character? or do we have to wait for the others to be out of danger?
>>
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>>1463760
Depends, can you bribe me with an image of this caliber?
>>
>>1463774
it would have to be a sketch in my book, I don't have a workable tablet.
>>
>>1463779
Then begone thot
>>
>>1463774
You really are a fucking Jew.
>>
>>1463739
And Horace managed to stab 12 of them in the throat
Cool
>>1463789
Hey, it's not my fault the standards was raised so high
And one player is a retard
>>
>>1463786
I can try to sketch you one then scan it and work on it there, would that work?
>>
>>1463799
so wait, how many is left?
>>
>>1463802
Depends on how good it is boi
>>
>>
>>1463817
ok how bout I draw you something from a 3ds paint studio thing, if it's good would you accept it?
>>
>>1463828
CAVALRY IS HERE BOYS
HELP HORACE TO FIGHT THEM
NOT GOING TO LEAVE HIM ALONE
>>
>>1463838
Damnit, if the big fellas going then i am too.
>>
>>1463816
>>1463828
3 Ghouls are left.
The other 15 are still being blinded by smoke and flashbang
>>
>>1463847
CLEAAAVE WHILE THEY CAN'T DODGE FOR SHIT
AOE CLEAVE
>>
>>1463847
Toss in one of my newly crafted shrapnel grenades.
>>
Rolled 6, 2, 8, 1, 3, 8, 1, 8, 9, 7, 3, 8, 2, 3, 4, 6, 3, 10 = 92 (18d10)
>>1463850
>>1463853
Both of you roll 18d10
Only 3 out of the 18 ghouls get a +6 Speed bonus
Gar gets a +8 Power bonus
Oswell gets a +5 no gf bonus
>>
Rolled 7, 3, 7, 5, 10, 7, 6, 3, 7, 9, 9, 6, 10, 10, 2, 5, 3, 2 = 111 (18d10)
>>1463862
ZANKANTOOOOUUU
>>
Rolled 5, 1, 5, 2, 6, 5, 1, 4, 6, 7, 7, 3, 9, 9, 5, 10, 3, 5 = 93 (18d10)
>>1463862
>+5 no gf bonus
Someday it'll be a +5 gf bonus.
Someday.
>>
>>1463865
>>1463864
And so all of the 18 remaining ghouls.
You both managed to miss the last 1
>>
>>1463889
NOW. Heads or tails, ghoul?
>>
>>1463889
And vertical cleave as revenge for Joseph
>>
>>1463896
"uh...armpits"
>>
>>1463903
Flip the coin.
Don't take this from me, GAR.
>>
>>1463918
fine geez
clean sword
>>
>>1463903
when's the character creation coming, OP?
>>
>>1463918
Heads or Tails?
>>1463925
Never
>>
>>1463925
I'll be off in 2 hours, you can join Gar controlsholy cross combo attack never ever now
>>
>>1463934
aw common op, just give him that, I promise to stop being retarded.
>>
>>1463934
Tails.
>>
>>1463945
Do you truly promise that?
>>
>>1463934
nigga, I'm getting bored here
>>
>>1463953
I'M DOING SOMETHING, you ungrateful prick. Wait your turn.
>>
>>1463952
yes, I'll play like I did with clackie but with the new character he will have a different personality and I'll play by Axmans rules.
>>
Rolled 2 (1d3)
>>1463950
3: Heads
2: Tails
1: Armpits
>>1463953
Well I'm sorry for boring you with my terrible adventure then.
>>
>>1463978
Oh hey it's Tails.
>>
>>1463983
wait coin toss was for anyway
>>
>>1463983
Fuck. I was actually hoping it would land on Armpits.
Oh, well. Regardless, he lost. Now he has to tell us of a way to revive our friend.
>>
>>1463993
"Have you tried...applying first aid?"
>>
>>1463999
try that on Joseph
>>
>>
>>
>>1464008
The name changes are cracking me up.
>>
>>1464002
.Right. Who''s volunteering? Be warned that there might be a chance you'll accidentally touch his penis.
>>
>>1464022
aw shit nigga
here we go, if this actually works, I'll be grateful
>>
>>1464022
I'm already branded.
I'll do it.
Someone else finish off the ghoul.
>>
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>1464026
Right. Roll 1d10 to apply first aid.
>>
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>1464045
Hope there aren't any wounds on his genitals. Here goes nothing.
>>
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>1464051
AND NOW.
Roll 1d10 for the no homo roll. Since you're already a homo with no gf, this is purely for his benefit.
>>
>>1464045
clean sword
again
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>1464068
God damnit.
Stop looking at me like that. I'm busy fondling/saving your life.
>>
>>1464068
we alive now?
>>
>>1464077
thanks nigga
>>
>>1464081
Your welcome, my dude.
>>
>>1464077
And so Joseph was saved. Oswell may have copped a feel here and there but it's cool, no homo.
>>
>>1464095
Wake up now, we're back niggas
>>
>>1464095
did ghouls drop any loot?
>>
>>1464095
ok back in the game
>>
>>1464095
"No homo" indeed. Now, what do you all say we head for those stairs the last ghoul we mercilessly slaughtered told us about?
>>
>>1464103
ok let's loot and head up the stairs
>>
>>1464098
Dunno, who's willing to dig through the piles of gore to search?
Also I think Horace is in a coma
>>
>>1464116
search through the bodies, blood doesn't affect us
>>
>>1464116
burn it down, leave the room, onto the next one
>>
>>1464116
I'll take his place, for a bit, no worries won't get him killed.
>>
>>1464116
Knock on Horace's head and ask if anybody is home.
>>
>>1464123
>>1464132
Ah yes. So Gar decides to burn the bodies while Joseph is under there. I see. Murder.
>>1464141
>>1464138
knock knock
>>
>>1464149
Look at GAR with an intense stare
"SOON"
>>
>>1464149
whose there? just settling in! I say loot and move on
>>
>>1464149
>Ah yes. So Gar decides to burn the bodies while Joseph is under there. I see. Murder.
fine, geez, let's get him out.
It's a joke, you see.well what if he was infected by ghoul blood, disaster can happen
>>
>>1464155
>>1464164
Yes. Soon...you'll be dead. Because you're on fire.
OR ARE YOU?
>>
>>1464164
no we aren't it's vampire trickery.
blood isn't flammable anyway, and I even no put down my torch
>>
>>1464172
stop the knocking I hear you
>>
>>1464172
just exit the room, nigga
>>
>>1464189
holy fire works
>>
>>1464196
try to locate the trickster
>>
>>1464196
what did we loot then, OP?
>>
>>1464196
check for traps in next room.
AI can do that right?
>>
>>1464199
Roll 1d10 for loot
8-10: Phat Loot
5-7: okay loot
1-4: meh loot
>>1464201
Yes, Al can indeed do that. But Al is not here now isn't he.
>>
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>1464206
new axe upgrade
>>
>>1464206
Ok then how about Horace.
Can he check for traps, if so do so.
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>1464206
everyone loots?
>>
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>1464206
>>
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>1464206
Hope you aren't all waiting on me.
>>
>>1464207
>>1464214
>>1464220
On the way to check for traps. Horace found 3 gold coins
>>1464209
>>1464217
Digging around the corpses, Joseph found 1 gold coin
While Gar found a blade stuck up some ghoul's ass. The Upgrade Merchant could use it to forge a new sword for him
>>1464228
On the way to knock on Horace's head while he checks for traps. Oswell found 1 gold coin
>>
>>1464237
looks good, upgrade merchant is gone however
let's find a way to the 2nd floor, I wanna face vampires not ghouls
>>
>>1464237
stop it Oswell.
>>
>>1464240
Yes. Let's make haste to the main hall where the stairs is
>>
>>1464237
>While Gar found a blade stuck up some ghoul's ass. The Upgrade Merchant could use it to forge a new sword for him
Not going to ask how it end up there.
goblins are weird
>>
>>1464248
STAHP!
>>
>>1464247
also, wrap the chain for the cleaver around one of our wrists so we can wield it Kratos style and have a new way to fight
>>
>>1464255
Start to tear up a little bit.
>>
>>1464248
>>1464255
Sad puppy eyes presented
>>
>>1464253
>They're ghouls, you mongoloid. That's racist.
same evil shit
>>
>>1464268
Horace makes Oswall stop
the gag ran it's course
>>
>>
>>1464275
>>1464281
>>1464287
Roll 1d10 against eachother
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>1464293
>>
>>1464293
very good, I'm liking these upgrades, OP
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>1464293
Ding-Dong.
>>
>>1464296
>>1464299
>a draw
The knocking continues
>>
This is just entertaining to watch. KEEP IT UP!!!
>>
>>1464300
never mind dodge his knocks
>>
>>1464304
you help sometimes when rolls suck
>>
>>1464309
>>1464302
Right, roll 2d10 again
Horace gets a +10 Speed Bonus
Oswell +5 no gf
>>
>>1464322
oh shit, whose that on the right, OP?
>>
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>1464322
Hey, Horace? Guess what? Knock, knock.
>>
Rolled 4, 5 = 9 (2d10)
>>1464322
>>
>>1464325
Who what
>>1464326
>>1464328
Welp. Horace finally managed to dodge the knocking
>>
>>1464335
Pout and cross my arms angrily.
>>
>>
>>1464337
>>1464340
Yeah sure.
he.
Sure.
>>
>>1464345
OH SHIT HE ACTUALLY IS AN ELF
WHAT A FAG
>>
>>1464345
who would have known....
>>
>>1464345
Ew.
>>
>>
>>1464345
ok search for traps
>>
>>1464360
oh shit graphics error, the fuck devs!?
>>
>>1464360
okay, let's keep going
I wanna face an actual vampire
>>
>>1464360
What is this peculiar creature looking at, I wonder?
Anyway, continue to the stairs.
>>
>>1464372
>>1464368
>>1464367
Right. Who wants to roll for encounter.
>>
>>1464390
didn't know Op was an knife ear lover
>>
>>1464390
Regular Hunter can do it
>>
>>1464394
Methinks you doth protest too much....Too too much.
>>
>>1464408
to the stairs
these graphic errors might stop on the next level
>>
>>1464408
also I thought it was "Me doth thinks you protest too much"
>>
Okay niggas, GAR going offline for 3-4 hours
plz don't kill my char off.bribe armor is not that thick
>>
>>1464420
DODGE
>>
>>1464400
Aight. Oswell scouts for enemies
Roll 1d10
9-10: Lesser Vampire
5-8: 2 Lesser Vampires
2-4: Vampire
1: oh shit an Elder
>>1464421
Yeah okay elf
>>
>>1464423
It's a joke you paranoid douche.
>>
>>1464428
>elf
I'm not
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>1464428
Let me just look through my x-ray glasses that I totally didn't order out of the back of a cheap catalogue.
>>
>>1464437
can I grow mustache then?
>>
>>1464431
that's my answer though
>>
>>1464442
C'mon! It's a good one, I swear.
>>
>>1464445
who's there
>>
>>1464441
Nah you're an elf.
>>
>>1464446
Rufus.
>>
>>1464447
maybe I am half elf
>>
>>1464448
Rufus who, and why haven't you rolled!?
>>
>>1464435
You bumped into 2 lesser vampires - fiends who have just recently been turned
>>1464449
Nah you're a whole elf....unlessss....
>>
>>
>>1464453
AIM FOR THE NECK
CLEAVER THROOOOOOOOW!
>>
>>1464456
Nah she didn't leave you.
You never had one in the first place.
>>
>>1464456
op I just lost 1 hp for that joke, it hurt that much
>>
>>
>>1464458
Pre-emptive attack
Since he aint at half health right now the passive doesn't activate.
+8 Power You
+6 Speed Lesser Vampire
>>1464462
Unless you make 5 payments of 10 million dollars each
>>
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>1464466
Whoops, forgot my roll
>>
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>1464466
YOUR HEAD IS GOING CLEAN OFF YOUR BODY
>>
>>1464466
Do they have to be staked in order to be killed, or can they be killed normally?
>>
>>1464466
>Unless you make 5 payments of 10 million dollars each
but all I have is this rubber chicken
>>
>>1464472
>all I have is this rubber chicken
Easily worth more than 50 mil I'd say, OP.
>>
>>
>>1464479
what attacks does Horace have?
>>
>>1464479
oh boy, I'm feeling it, close to half health
>>
>>1464479
>Dunno. I can get rubber chickens for 25 Mil cheap
I'll bet they're not the same quality as this rubber chicken he's got.
>>
>>
>>1464481
- Stab
- Run around so fast that enemies see you as invisible
- Do a sick cape swish to distract your enemy for a free rapier stab into their juggular
- Backflip
- Use Item
>>
>>1464479
ok do cape move on other lesser vampire
>>
>>1464490
Did you ever list Oswell's abilities anywhere? If you did I must have missed them. Unless I have none.
>>
>>1464497
I haven't
>>
>>1464498
I'd appreciate that when you get a moment.
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>1464492
>>1464494
Roll 1d10
Horace has +5 Special Bonus
Lesser Vampire has +4 Will bonus
>>1464499
When you get to your turn,yes
>>
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>1464501
stabby stabby
>>
>>1464506
really?
>>
Rolled 2 (1d3)
>>1464506
A hidden rapier stab from under the cape! But the Lesser Vampire saw through it and dodged!
Now it's one of their turn! The Lesser Vampire is aiming at:
1: Horace
2: Oswell
3: Joseph
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>1464518
The wounded one is gonna try a neck bite.
Oswell roll 1d10 for defense
+6 Speed for the Lesser Vampire
+5 homo for Oswell
>>
>>1464518
uh oh
>>
>>1464533
YOUR NECK, YOU HOMO NO GF
DON'T GET BIT
>>
>>1464487
where you at dude
>>
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>1464533
I blame busyorc for this.
>>
>>1464546
Oh shit, nigger. Can he save the day?
>>
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>1464545
>>1464546
OH FUCK! IF OSWELL GETS BIT NOT ONLY WILL HE BE HURT, BUT THE FIEND WILL ALSO GET HEALED!
HORACE THROWS A KNIFE AT THE LAST SECOND! CAN IT HIT?!
Horace roll 1d10
+6 Lesser Vamp
+10 Horace
>>
>>1464550
OH SHIIIIT
>>
>>
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>1464550
>>
>>
>>1464558
Sure. Everyone gets 1 interruption per battle. Can be done anytime when an ally fails a roll.
But remember, each of you only get to do it once per battle.
>>
>>1464562
Per battle means from the start of the enemies being introduced to when we either retreat, they stop attacking, or they're all cleared out, right?
>>
Rolled 1 (1d3)
>>1464555
Success! The Lesser Vampire relents! Oswell is unharmed!
This one now has 5/8 HP!
Now it's the second Lesser Vamp's turn!
The Lesser Vampire is aiming at:
1: Horace
2: Oswell
3: Joseph
>>1464564
Yeah.
>>
>>
>>
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>1464567
MY GOD! IT's THE SECRET VAMPIRE TRICK!
He throws a nearby brick at Horace
+5 Power for Lesser Vamp
+10 Speed for Horace
+Brick brick power for Brick
>>
>>
>>1464575
for a sec I thought that was a wooden stake
>>
>>1464579
Yes
>>
>>1464580
Same.
>>
>>1464580
Yeah, me too.
>>
>>1464580
Me three
>>
>>
Anyway. Horace parried the brick.
Now it's Oswell's turn
Oswell can:
- Attack using his sword
- Do a sucker punch, stunning the enemy
- Throw smoke bomb -> Escape
- Throw flash bomb -> Blind enemy
- Throw Explosive bomb -> Damage enemy
- Throw Shrapnel bomb -> Damage enemy ( higher AoE)
- Throw knife
- Coat knife or sword with poison made from ghoul blood
- Be a homo
- Not get a gf
>>
>>1464593
Oswell is good at doing the last two, that's for sure
>>
>>1464593
Just stab the injured faggot. On an unrelated note, how many doses of poison do I have?
>>
>>
>>1464596
Shut up or I'll turn you gay too. You want to end up like GAR?
>>
Well well well. Looks like a good ol' adventure
>>
Ah shit. Have you ever pooped so hard that your ass hurt?
Yeah, just uh, putting that out there.
>>
>>1464612
oh yeah, too much spicy food will do that
>>
>>1464615
Or too much fiber. It's whatever, really.
>>
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>1464598
Right. So Oswell wants to PENETRATE the Lesser Vampires' GAPING WOUND with his LONG HARD SWORD
Roll 1d10
+6 Speed for the fiend
+5 Average Joe for you
>poison doses
Like 5
>>
>>1464619
Ah. Nothing has changed.
>>
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>1464619
Fuck you too.
>>
>>1464625
you failed to penetrate
>>
>>1464619
what's Gar's move set?
>>
>>
>>1464632
If you ask GARKsenthen it's something like:
-Cleave
-CLEAVE
-CLLLEEEEAAAVVVEEE!!!
>>
>>1464633
No. I was in past adventures. And for some reason twitter autounfollowed NaP so i didnt know about his threads for a while
>>
Anyway. it's the Axeman's turn.
He can:
- Chop
- Throw cleaver
- Has a passive that if an enemy has half health or less then he has a chance to decap them in one hit
- Be a creppy fuck
- Remove mask to reveal self to be a hot lady hunter all along and become Oswell's gf, curing him of his homosexuality [this button is disabled]
>>
>>1464640
Do the holy cross combo attack with GAR on the 5/8 health Vampire
>>
>>1464640
>- Remove mask to reveal self to be a hot lady hunter all along and become Oswell's gf, curing him of his homosexuality [this button is disabled]
Literally impossible. You made me roll to avoid touching his dick for crying out loud.
>>
>>1464644
Hence the disabled button.
>>
>>1464646
A powerful magical item that projects a phallic aura
>>
>>1464640
Am I the only one who thinks his hat looks like a large nose on top of his head?
>>
>>1464651
that's beause it is
>>
>>1464651
You're dealing with knowledge mortals are not meant to know
>>
File: IMG_6419.gif (136KB, 480x480px) Image search:
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136KB, 480x480px
>>1464654
>>
Anyway. Will Gar accept the call for a combo attack?
>>
>>1464658
Guess not.
>>
>>1464661
Anyway I can join the combo in his stead?
>>
>>1464661
yes
>>
>>1464668
Sure.
>>
>>1464671
poop sorry I'm excresizing at the same time and practicing my kung fu which I suck at ...
>>
>>1464671
>>1464673
Roll 1d10 to do a combo attack on the wounded Lesser Vampire
The winner number is whichever is the higher number between you two.
You have a 8 + 5 = 13 Power bonus shared between you two
The Lesser Vamp has a +6 Speed bonus
>>
>>1464673
<cry>
>>
>>
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>1464677
AXE SPLITTEEEEEEEEER
>>
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>1464677
Whoops, forgot roll
>>
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>1464677
VAMP FAGS GTFO
>>
>>1464679
I'm not it was just an accident
>>
>>1464682
AW SHIT NIGGAAAA
>>
>>1464682
Dude now has 2/8 HP left.
Now it's Gar's turn
>>
>>1464687
CLEEEAAAAVE
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>1464688
Roll 2d10
First roll is to see if it hits
+7 Power You
+6 Speed Lesser Vamp
Second is Cleave chance if attack hits
Get >=5 and the fiend gets cut in half
>>
Rolled 8, 1 = 9 (2d10)
>>1464694
>>
>>1464696
fuck
>>
>>1464696
Killed the Lesser Vamp.
But it's still in one piece. Awww.
Welp. now it's Horace's turn. 1 fiend left.
>>
>>1464702
the comic amount of blood is really good
>>
>>1464702
Finish him!
>>
>>1464704
The remaining one still has a full abr of 8 HP
>>
>>1464707
Taunt him, tell him his bowler hat is shit and that our nostril hat is way better
>>
>>1464707
Nice sideburns, fucknugget. Do you need a rake to comb those?
>>
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>1464709
>>1464712
Horace. Roll 1d10 to taunt the lesser vampire. For yours is a much sweeter hat.
While Joseph stand in the corner like a faglord because it's not his turn yet
Horace has +5 Special Bonus
Lesser Vampire has +4 Will bonus
>>
>>1464713
I thought talking was a free action, OP
>>
Rolled 2 (1d3)
>>1464715
Shutup faglord
>>1464717
Failed
And now the due's gonna attack
The Lesser Vampire is aiming at:
1: Horace
2: Oswell
3: Joseph
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>1464722
He's calling Oswell a fag
Roll 1d10 for defense
+5 Special for Lesser Vamp
+5 Will to live for Oswell
>>
>>1464727
Sorry, was doing something.
Fuck your couch, vampire.
>>
>>1464729
>a zero
ooh, the worst roll
>>
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>1464729
Fuck my life too, I forgot to roll.
>>
>>1464732
Oh no. The terrible insult stunned Oswell. Because it reminded him that he's a fucking homo that will never get a gf. Doomed to forever crying himself to sleep everynight.
Anyway it's Joseph's turn
>>
>>1464735
NECK CHOP WITH THE AXE!
>>
>>1464735
>crying himself to sleep every night
Jokes on you. I never get sleep because of my nightmares involving summer camp.
>>
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>1464737
Roll 1d10
+8 Powah Joseph
+6 Speed Lesser Vamp
>>1464739
Hey,i was trying to not tell people the fact that you were regularly molested during the All Boys Hunter Summer Fun Time Camp period of your life.
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>1464740
"SOON." GLARE AT HIM INTENTLY WHILE SWINGING THAT AXE
>>
>>1464741
6/8 HP left
Gar's turn
>>
>>1464744
stake him
in the heart
>>
>>1464744
jesus, I didn't know we had that much power, even while one handed
>>
>>
>>
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>1464745
Ah yes. The good ol stake to the heart. A 1 Hit Kill on Lesser and Normal Vampires.
But if you fail you get attacked back unlike other attacks. Since you' have to get reaaaalll close to try
Roll 1d10
+7 Power Gar
+6 Speed Lesser Vamp
>>
Rolled 1 (1d1)
>>1464750
>>
>>1464752
the fuck nigga
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>1464750
sorry
>>
>>1464752
Really nigger
>>
>>1464752
For a split second I was actually wondering how you managed to fuck that up.
>>
>>1464755
I fixed I fixed
>>
>>1464758
Nah. You only get one roll boi. Only when there's multiple players per character will the second roll count
>>
>>1464759
The first roll was a 1d1 tho.
>>
>>1464759
but I used the wrong die first time
>>
>>1464761
>>1464762
Nah it's too late
My drawing hand already popped out a vampire kicking you in the dick
>>
>>1464764
holy shit, how embarrassing
>>
>>1464764
the fuck
>>
Are any hunters open?
>>
>>1464764
But since I'm such a merciful and just QM. The vampire also got staked and died.
>>1464768
All hunters are open. It's not meant to be "only 1 player per hunter"
>>
>>1464770
ayy
let's loot em now, boss
>>
>>1464770
But do any not have a player so we can have the full team.
>>
>>1464772
Well let's check.
WHO'S PRESENT, REPLY TO THIS POST
>>
>>1464775
here nigga
>>
>>1464775
Presents?
>>
>>1464775
hurp
>>
>>1464775
It was a one-eyed one-horned flyin purple people eater
>>
>>
>>1464780
Time to be fast it seems.
>>
Right. So Horace might be empty soon, so anon can join in there if he wants.
ANYWAY. Loot.
Got:
-10 Gold coins
-Pamphlet
>>
>>1464782
Read the pamphlet and hand Gar a spare stake from my inventory.
>>
>>1464782
nice
let's see what the pamphlet is all about
>>
>>1464785
they think we are evil
cute
>>
>>1464785
burn this heretical pamphlet
>>
>>1464785
Flip it over.
>>
>>1464787
Not yet, friend.
>>
>>1464791
I expected nothing less.
Do we still have those ghoul pants, OP?
>>
>>1464791
BURN IT
>>
>>1464794
Tear them apart to make some spare bandages.
>>
>>1464794
let's take the stairs to the 2nd floor, we'll never get to the top at this rate
>>
>>1464794
Check and see what the Vampires were doing in this room.
>>
>>1464794
Forgot to add:
I don't know why, but that cracked me up.
>>
>>1464799
Well, this is the main ahll. With a big set of stairs leading up to the second floor. So they're probably just lazing around guarding it. Or discussing waifus, who knows.
>>1464795
Some spare bandages have been made
>>1464796
When a vampire gets stake, it burns up along with the stake. now there's nothing but ashes now.
>>1464797
Yes, stairs
>>
>>1464805
Take out some of the railings for the stairs by chopping them and craft them into stakes for the party.
>>
>>1464805
any vamps
>>
>>1464805
What kind of recipes are in that crafting book I picked up a while back?
>>
>>1464806
Nigga they're made outta marble. Vampires wouldn't want one of those Wizard of Oz situations where you keep your biggest weakness inside your own home.
>>
>>1464810
Might as well peek and see whats up on the next floor.
>>
>>
>>
>>1464810
Small talk with Joseph
"Ive been in a lot of scummy vampire dens in my day, but this plce is nice."
>>
>>1464809
>>1464816
>>1464812
>>1464813
Roll 1d10 for scouting
9-10: No enemies yet
6-8: 1 Lesser Vampires
4-5: 3 Lesser Vampires
2-3: 2 Vampires
1: Oh shit it's the final boss
>>
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>1464825
aw shit nigga
>>
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>1464825
False alarm
>>
>>1464825
Delve a little bit into the tools section. Anything that extends my versatility is useful.
>>
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>1464825
>1d10
>>
>>1464830
"...right, so if I send my request right now. My limited edition figurine would be delivered from the eastern lands to here in about a w--OH SHIT HUNTERS!"
>>1464832
Ah yes tools,Throwing knives, Double Throwing knives, Knife that splits into 3 little knifes, Holy Water squirt bottle, Garlic Shuriken, Grappling Hook, Leg Traps, A brick...
>>
>>1464844
cleeeaaavee
>>
>>1464844
thrrrrrrusttt
>>
>>1464844
Throwing knife to the neck so he can't call for aid.
Grappling hook looks useful. What kinda materials do I need?
>>
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>1464845
>>1464847
>>1464849
COMBO ATTACK!
Roll 1d10, the highest will be picked
You have a combined bonus of 5+7+10 = 22
Lesser Vamp has a +6
>>1464849
Grappling Hook materials:
- A rope
- A hook
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>1464851
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>1464851
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>1464851
>>
Ayo y'all missing a hunter?
>>
>>1464856
If I decide to head out here in a few you can take over again.
>>
>>1464852
>>1464853
>>1464854
Dude has 4/8 HP left. Sad
>>1464856
Feel free to join any
>>
>>1464860
let's try a spicy one here.
CLEAVER THROW DECAPITATION!
>>
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>1464863
Roll 2d10
First roll is hit, second is decap chance
+8 Power you
+6 Speed the wounded creature
If hit, get >=6 on the second roll
>>
Rolled 6, 9 = 15 (2d10)
>>1464864
FWOOSH
>>
GAR IS HERE
WHAT TO CLEAVE
WHAT TO ROLL
WHAT TO PROTECT
>>
>>
Alright, Oswell it is.
>>1464870
What's our inventory looking like, have you used any bombs?
>>
>>1464870
Arrived just at the right time for loot, I see.
>>
>>1464864
When this attack is over. Use my extra fast and get behind the vampire[spoilers]then stab it[/spoilers]
>>
>>1464873
nigga, he's dead already
>>
>>1464865
Decapitation
>>
>>1464876
Take its hat.
>>
>>1464876
feels good
the other will want to loot, so let's do that
>>
>>1464871
I think I've used a single smoke bomb, and that's it. I made some bandages and I was planning on making a grappling hook cause I thought it would be useful for immobilizing enemies. And also anything else you use a grappling hook for.
>>
Then Horace used his extra fast to get behind the headless corpse to stab it for some reason.
And took its hat
>>
>>1464882
looks like that hat is all we're gonna get, let's get a move on
>>
>>1464882
loot his figurine
>>
>>
>>
>>1464882
Pocket the hat. Look around the rest of the area for doorways and things.
>>
Right, loot loot loot.
Horace got a hat
Oswell got 2 fa(n)gs and his knife back
The party got 2 gold and an order for a figurine of Love Love Vamp-Chan
>>
>>1464890
I'd hunt the head of Love Love Vamp-Chan any day
>>
>>1464891
Tru that.
>>
>>1464891
Third ,d00d.
>>
>>1464891
Your waifu is a shit. Love-Love Hunter Chan is much better.
>>
>>1464891
>>1464893
>>1464895
>>1464896
An otherworldy sound echoes throughout the castle
>>
>>1464897
OP, what's wrong with waifus?
>>
>>1464898
That aint me, that was the Vampire Lord.
OR WAS IT?
You will never knoooowwww
>>
>>1464899
so vampire lord
ok
or not ok....
>>
>>1464899
Throw cleaver at OP bat
>>
>>1464899
Use the power of fast and assault the creepy bat. Then look around for doors.
>>
>>1464899
look for merchan to get our sword, the only true waifu, an upgrade
>>
>>1464903
Snicker at Gar for being a weeb.
>>
>>1464901
>>1464902
>>1464905
And so Oswell snickers at Gar for being a fucking weeaboo. Makes sense. Gar's a homo.
>>
>>1464906
hey is the other axe guy here? I'll need you take over
>>
File: 1386477349181.gif (92KB, 420x390px) Image search:
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92KB, 420x390px
Also I gotta go poop again. Pls wait
>>
>>1464906
Oh shit he actually died.
Well let's look around for the merchant guy, we have some spending money.
>>
>>1464905
see character sheet nigga
I stay in character
>>
>>1464906
Might as well try and loot the bat. If it's op it muust have some gud l00t
>>
>>1464916
Sure, i'll do that for a while
>>
>>1464924
thanks homie
axeman is easy to play
>>
>>1464917
You'll only get dissapointment
>>
>>1464927
Ah, even better.
Gotta leave for like 30 minutes, don't let Oswell and Joseph die, they're my favorites.
>>
>>1464935
I'll do my best.
>>
And since nobody's looting me. I'll just go and let normal services resume
>>
>>1464934
Do some pushups.
>>
>>1464941
And so you did
>>
>>1464949
Can we find a merchant?
>>
>>1464949
Look at this show-off.
Do some sit ups.
>>
>>1464950
pls no
>>
>>
>>1464956
What are you hiding!? Give me everything you own!
>>
>>1464957
>>1464959
nuoooh, muh secret boxes
>>
>>1464961
I know this isn't it. Where are the season passes and DLCs!?
>>
>>1464963
Up your ass, where else.
No seriouslky, I hid them up Oswell's anus. To retrieve them somebody gotta reach in and take it.
>>
>>1464962
Hell yeah boi. We about to str8 mug this faggot.
>>
>>
>>1464967
How the fuck you get them there without me noticing? If we just wait five hours or so we'll have all the DLCs.
>>
>>1464967
Where are the hats OP. Give me the hats and you have my permission to die.
>>
>>1464970
Your loss, there's some good stuff in there mayne
>>1464973
I have my ways
>>1464974
Up Oswell's ass
>>
>>1464967
Retrieve boxes from said anus
>>
>>1464977
Nigger I will kill you if you try and touch my shitbox.
>>
>>1464976
Retrieve boxes from said anus.
It isnt gay if its a medical procedure
>>
>>1464976
whatever, can we find more evil to cleave now?
>>
>>1464977
Put the dying body of Op in a bag. We can craft it into something later. The trader will surely give us a good reward for this creature.
>>
>>1464982
I was under the impression that this was all going on because OP was still taking a shit.
>>
>>1464982
Have you tried cleaving OP?
>>
>>1464981
Roll 1d100 against eachother
Joseph rolls for penetration
Oswell rolls for clenching
>>
Rolled 91 (1d100)
>>1464986
>>
>>
>>1464988
I saved your life and these are the thanks I get?
Why have you betrayed me so, brother?
>>
>>1464988
>>1464990
Note that Joseph isn't wearing any gloves.
>>
>>1464995
I saved your anus from blockage
>>
>>1464998
So this is what's it's like to have prostate cancer.
>>
Rolled 880 (1d10000)
Oh yeah.
Roll 1d10 for it to be no homo
>>
>>1465000
same reason I didn't bandage my dick in first part of adventurewe forgot that was an option
>>
>>1465000
Wheres the fun in that?
>>
>>
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>1465002
>>
>>1465007
Joseph's a homo now.
While Oswell's a double homo with a gaping anus.
ANd all that digging around Oswell's asshole resulted in the party getting:
- A clump of Oswell's poop
the end
>>
>>1465008
moral of the storydon't believe in easy loot
now with that out of the way, let's find more evil to cleave
>>
>>1465008
This has been the gayest Quest yet. And that's saying something because we're only two threads in.
>>
>>1465010
Gayest Quest SO FAR!
Open mystery boxes and follow Gar
>>
>>1465010
Yes. For you see, that was merely a distraction so I could escape.
I lied, the DLC wasn't inside Oswell's ass.
It was actually inside Horace's ass.
>>
>>1465014
naaaah
>>
>>1465014
>It was actually inside Horace's ass.
>only non-homo party member left.
One of us. One of us.
>>
>>1465014
Didn't I put you in a bag you cheeky lil bastard.
>Ready the speed for a quick getaway
>>
>>1465016
Yesss, do it. Shove your hand riiiight up in there.
And retrieve to DLC of Legend.
>>
>>1465019
I think vampires and whatever are a bit afraid of gayest hunters now
so let's stop the act
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)
>>1465019
K
>>
>>1465019
Yeah, I've had enough molestation for a lifetime. I don't even remember what we were actually doing.
>>
>>
>>
>>1465023
>>1465021
Right.
1 Agile Hunter Player left to make the deciding rollll
>>
greed consumes our party
and greed is evil
stop before I'll want to cleave and smite
>>
>>1465024
You saved our ass. In the truest sense of the term. Thank you
>>
>>1465025
Tackle Joseph.
This should count as combat.
>>
>>1465024
Aaaand he did
Horace countered Joseph and shoved a rapier up his ass
>>
>>
>>1465030
Wow.
>>
fuck it, I'm going on solo
screw these weirdos
>>
>>1465031
Im more worried about this fag over here trying to punch my stinkbox
Let's head toward the next room! Follow Gar
>>
>>1465034
I'm with him.
>>
Nah. Im done with that
>>
Yes. Keep looking forward. don't mind me. Definitely not taking the mysteru boxes away
>>1465034
"Hello. I'm the enemy that spawns when you try to go solo"
ELDER VAMPIRE KNIGHT
Power 20
Speed 20
Health 20
Special 20
Will 20
>>
>>1465043
Fuck, I thought we took the mystery boxes!
Retrieve mystery boxes and give them to Oswell?
>>
>>1465043
that's not good, don't go solo
>>
>>
>>1465043
Is this for real or nah?
>>
Well that took longer than expected
oh shit what the fuck happened.
>>
>>1465052
We got our ass fisted for the sake of DLC's. You can blame Joseph for this.
>>
>>1465045
What boxes
>>1465048
The Vampire Knight takes his GreatSword of +10 Damage and ability to Instalkill anyone with HP number in the evens, and leave.
>>
>>1465048
but I promised op that I wouldn't do anything retarded, you are making retarded choices again
>>
>>1465057
Toss holy water at him to intervene.
>>
>>1465057
Flee.
>>
>>
>>1465061
The boxes never existed at all, don't you get it!? They're a farce! A fraud!
>>
>>
>>1465064
K then we flee too.
>>
Rolled 1 (1d2)
>>1465059
The holy water caused 5 damage.
Now he has 15/20 Health left
BATTLE STARTED, EVERYBODY'S INVOLVED.
AND SINCE HE HAS THE HIGHEST SPEED, THE VAMPIRE KNIGHT GOES FIRST
HE'S GONNA CUT:
1: Horace and Oswell
2: Joseph and Gar
>>
>>1465069
RIP Horace and Oswell
>>
>>1465069
Wut. Wait, who's playing Axeman?
>>
>>1465069
But i said no.
>>
>>
>>
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>1465078
Well, we're insta-dead.
Can we offer the knight a sandwich to spare us?
>>
>>1465078
Oh yeah. Forgot pic.
>>
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>1465078
Gay desu.
Someone take the smokebombs off our body and escape.
>>
>>1465080
*record scratch*
Hol up
>>
>>1465080
That reminds me, we can still challenge the knight to a game of cards. Maybe all undead really like gambling or something.
>>
>>
>>1465086
"what kinda sandwich"
>>
>>1465087
All kinds of sandwich.
>>
this is an elder. Not a master.
Mr. Elder vampire. There is a fairy thing mith tons of mystery boxes bleeding and crawling away as we speak.
If you leave now you can probably catch it. I selled a box it smelled like some kind of peanutbutter.
>>
>>1465087
with bacon
>>
>>
>>1465092
>>1465091
>>1465090
>>1465089
"Hmmmm.....gimme that sandwich and tell me where this OP creature is"
>>
>>1465097
last time I saw him he was bleeding out like crazy
>>
>>1465097
In far far away land filled with poak buns
>>
>>1465097
It's over there
*point to the trail of blood leading to OP*
And here.
*Give Elder a sandwich made with the chicken of that ghoul we executed. Bless his heart.*
>>
>>
>>1465098
>>1465099
>>1465100
>>1465101
He takes the sandwiches. Both Horace's and Oswell's
"Very well, I shall seek out this "OP" and his sandwiches. You better not split up again"
>>
>>
>>1465104
Do commemorative happy family/team photo waving to him
>>
>>1465104
Yes sir.
Guys we should really go find The Merchant again for more holy water, before we meet any other elders. I'm out of sandwiches too.
>>
>>
Wow, some vampire hunters you guys are. Had to bribe one with some sandwiches so you wouldn't die. Good job!
>>
>>1465111
Which anon are you?
>>
>>1465111
we still lvl 1 and zero upgrades, nigga
that dude is obviously PLOT device causeOP is too lazy to draw and follow multiple chars
>>
>>1465112
I am no one, I only came here to laugh at you
>>
>>
>>1465122
What boxes
>>
>>1465124
Oh shit, it's OP's ruses again!
>>
>>1465124
nooope, there are none of those
>>
>>1465124
poop them out
>>
>>1465125
Or is it. I dunno.
>>
>>1465130
it just won't fit
Don't believe OP lies
>>
>>1465130
Damn that's a big sword. How'd you fit it inside the box?
>>
>>1465130
dasa biga sword
>>
>>1465133
What you should ask is how I fit it inside Gar's ass.
The answer is lube.
Same goes for this cape that gives +10 speed and +5 coolness
>>
>>1465136
free loot doesn't exist
don't believe OP lies
>>
>>1465141
But wouldn't your team mates want this cure for homosexuality?
>>
>>1465146
Nah it's pretty chill actually.
>>
>>
>>1465148
Very well. Then let's continue snooping around the second floor
>>
>>1465146
>getting cure from homo by doing homo things
I doubt that.
>>
>>1465153
how long till level up?
>>
>>1465146
peek inside the batcave
>>
>>1465155
How long are you gonna stand there and do nothing?
>>
>>1465166
I thought I was asking while going in
proceed inside carefully
>>
>>1465166
Join the others in the search.
>>
>>1465166
Im still wanting to look in that there cave. With the bat on top
>>
>>1465168
>>1465170
>>1465172
Right. So Horace and Gar heads into the main corridor, ignoring the two doors on the side. While the other 2 hunters stay in a coma.
Who wants to roll for traps
>>
>>1465176
Traps r gay. Horace refuses to roll for them
>>
>>1465176
bring coma fags with us too, we can't separate
I'll do trap check
>>
>>1465176
Hey i'm coming too.
But i'll take a quick peek into the door on the right first.
>>
>>1465180
Roll 1d10 to check for traps
9-10: Safe
6-8: Arrows
3-5: Spikes
1-2: Fire pit
>>1465181
Peeking into that keyhole
Roll 1d10 to find out what you saw
10: Naked vampire
7-9: Storage room
4-6: Vampires
2-3: Angry Vampires
1: Naked vampire
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>1465186
I wish I had that crotch armor upgrade honestly.
>>
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>1465186
K
>>
>>1465193
OH SHIT
>>
>>1465190
Arrows! Penetrating armor!
because of your low speed you need to roll a 1d10 witht he results being >=8
>>1465193
Oswell managed to catch a glimpse of a female vampire changing.
But since he's a homosexual the actual visuals are disabled.
>>
>>1465195
Did i get a boner?
>>
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>1465195
I wonder if I had a bigger sword would it block them as shield
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)
>>1465200
Roll 1d10 to see if you managed to get a boner and cure your homosexuality
>>1465201
Indeed it would. But hey, thanks to you being a meat shield, the trap damaged only one party member, you.
Now somebody fix Gar
>>
>>1465206
'TIS IS BUT A SCRATCH
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>1465206
Aw maaaan.
>>
>>1465209
Oooh, too bad. You're still a fag.
>>
>>1465206
Guess I'll pull Gar out of there and give some first aid
>>
>>1465211
Well then i'll enter the room and stake that female vampire. May as well, at this point.
>>
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>1465212
Roll 1d10 to administer first aid
>>1465214
Roll 1d10 to pick lock
9-10: lock opens
3-8: Can't open lock
1-2: Somehow you managed to break you lockpick in half, sending pieces of it straight into your eyeball
>>
>>1465211
Penetrate the room
>>
>>1465218
thankfatgod for endless amount of blood
>>
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>1465218
Rly?
>>
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>1465218
You may feel a lslight pinching sensation.
>>
>>1465224
Slight?
size of a tree?
>>
>>1465224
Wait no. That's not how that works. Hmmm, let's try that again
>>1465222
yes, rly
>>
>>1465226
reminds me of fallout, using medkit to break a leg
>>
>>1465228
Quietly open the door and sneak into the room, wooden stake in hand, ready to penetrate a girl for the first time.
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>1465228
I'm sure I can do it this time
>>
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>1465231
Right, lessee
>>1465230
Sneaky sneaky
>>
>>1465236
plz
stahp
>>
>>1465236
Wait wtf.
Is Gar's dick bleeding again?
Whatever, stake the vampire chick right between the tits.
>>
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>1465236
Can I just heal myself OP?
>>
>>1465243
I guess not
>>
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>1465236
The blood loss means it's working!
>>
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>1465237
Horace managed it Juuust in time. 1 Hp left
>>1465239
Roll 1d10
+5 no gf you
+8 speed Vampire
>>
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>1465247
Aw shieeet.
>>
>>1465247
how do we refill our HP then
also I'll not scout anymore
fuck that
>>
>>1465247
told you I would fix it up just fine
>>
>>1465250
The attacked failed. The vampire took the stake from your hand and stabbed you in the dick with it.
>>1465251
Try using some medicine.
>>
>>1465258
>Try using some medicine.
do we have some?
>>
>>1465259
Yes. it's how the party passively go back to full health after every battle in case you haven't noticed.
To restore health...wait a while for HP regen or win a battle with current HP.
Which is 1 for you.
>>
>>1465258
Dick move bruh.
Geddit?
DICK.
kek as i sucker punch her.
Or use any attack that uses Strenght and not Speed.
>>
>>1465258
Axe her a question.
"Did you know racecar backwards is racecar!?!
>>
>>1465264
wait a while for regen to kick in.
I'm not going in battle with one HP, nope.
Just sit awhile and try to come up with somesolidpuns to use in future
>>
>>1465265
Your bleeding dick is making you unable to act
>>1465266
Roll 1d10 to axe the question
You have +4 Special Bonus
Vampire has +7 Will Bonus
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>1465270
Oh yeah, roll
>>
>>1465270
Patch up dick.
Assure her that it's still usable if she wants to.
Stake her
>>
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>1465270
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>1465274
Roll 1d10 to attempt patching up of the dick
>>1465275
The attack failed. The vampire turns into a bat and escapes, leaving you to recieve the full blast of Oswell's dick blood geyser
>>
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>1465277
At least i got to see sum tittays
>>
>>1465277
Clean self
>>
>>1465278
Well that didn't patch things up at all
>>
Hmm, which pun I should use next.
I think solid arrows... nah, doesn't cut it.
They only cut my face.
I still think we'll need quite solid bucket for all that blood tho
>>
>>1465282
I guess I gott heal this guy to. Step aside, medic coming thru
>>
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>1465287
Yeah better do it quick. He's got like 2 HP left
Roll 1d10
>>
>>1465290
Hmm
That's almost solid red color right there.
>>
>>1465290
Good thing i bought the armored coat, it kept me alive.
>>
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>1465290
Ez
>>
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>1465294
Yous topped the bleeding. On his penis.
SO YA KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS
Roll 1d10 to see if it was no homo
>>
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>1465295
not in the slightest.
>>
>>1465295
everyone's favorite
>>
>>1465299
Eeeyup. You're a fag now.
>>
>>1465305
at least we are still alive
the most important
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I_izvAbhExY
>>
>>1465305
Onward
>>
>>1465307
no, stay and refill HP
we camping now
>>
>>1465307
Yes. Let's press onwards you fags. Maybe there's vampires to fight. With a party of 2 at full health and 2 near death.
>>
>>1465313
no, let's camp in the hall
with candles and such
>>
>>1465313
Look around for merchant Cousin
>>
>>1465315
"no. Continue and get stabbed in the face you faggot hunter"
>>1465317
You mean Merchant who's totally not your cousin and who's definitely not working with you to scam the party outta their money?
>>
>>1465319
"what was that disembodied voice?"
>>
>>1465319
No, I'm hungry
make a firepit out of candles
do we have food, or gotta cook monsters?
>>
>>1465319
Yeah, totally that guy.
>>
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>1465320
"There's no voice here. And definitely no vampires waiting to ambush you fags at the end of this hallway"
>>1465321
>cook monsters
>eating ghoul and vampire flesh
I smell a heretic
>>1465323
Roll 1d10 to find the upgrade shop
>>
>>1465329
>I smell a heretic
and I smell barbecue
what do you expect us to do? fight evil on empty stomach?
>>
>>1465332
>resorting to eating accursed meat already
>not using rations
Yep, definitely a heretic
>>
>>
>>1465334
>eating foul cursed meat
>ever
>even as a last resort
Yeah heretic.
See, because of your heretical ways, everyobody left
>>
>>1465336
nah, it's just because I farted
>>
>>1465338
That's what a heretic does.
>>
>>1465340
good thing we are just hunters, and not paladins then, right?
cause if it was adventure about Paladins smiting shit all over the place, I'd be fucked.
>>
I'm trying to figure out a way to cure fagness. Besides offing myself
>>
>>
>>1465344
>If you're not gonna commit to cleaving evil then don't even try at all.
cleaving evil hardly have anything to do with god, it's about personal sense of JUSTICE
>>
>>1465344
A responce to what? It didn't seem to need me so I chilled back amd thought about the choices that led me here
>>
>>
>>1465352
>>eating shitty cursed meat that'll turn you into a monster that'll attack innocents
but what if I add some salt?
also I haven't eat any yet
it's banter just banter to get some rest to get my HP up, cause just sitting at fire with 3 other fags being offline is kinda boring.
I already drew dicks on their faces anyway
>>
And since thread's dead.
The ceiling collapses and killed everyone one. The end, see you next time.
UpdarteS: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>
>>1465359
that's some solid red
I blame orcs
>>
>>1465359
Fell asleep.
Sorry bb
>>
They were all dead
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