EDGY AS FUCK Quest 1

>>143952
Kick the chest repeatedly until it opens up.

File: ahumblechestbeating.gif (14KB, 300x188px) Image search: [Google]

14KB, 300x188px

>>143957

You BEAT THE SHIT out of the chest. It looks sad.

And lootable.

Inside the chest is an EDGY AS FUCK sword, a pack of BORING cards, a WATER canteen, and a piece of gum.

>>143973
Use your tears to fill up the water canteen while thinking about how shitty and miserable your life has been.

>>143973
Check the 22nd pocket. You left your knife in there, didn't you?

File: humblecryingwithaknife.png (20KB, 909x613px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 909x613px

>>143982

You start crying, filling the canteen with EDGY AS FUCK tears, thinking about what shitty circumstances could have brought you here.

>>143990

While crying you remember your EDGY AS FUCK knife in the 22nd pocket.

You should stop forgetting about things like that.

>>144003
Wait, what's that in your 65th pocket? Is that your special edition EDGY AS FUCK Hello Kitty Gun?

>>144003
Slit your wrist to see if you still feel.

>>144003
Your name is Kenji "the Son of Darkness" Shadowfax

File: humbleopening.png (50KB, 640x400px) Image search: [Google]

50KB, 640x400px

>>144008

You reach into the 65th pocket, and discover that there is in fact a gun. An EDGY AS FUCK!!! LIMITED EDITION HELLO KITTY HANDGUN.

What the fuck is wrong with you.

>>144015


You, being the EDGY AS FUCK masked man that you are, decide to cut yourself.

Fuck that hurt.

>>144017

So that's why you wear a mask.

The door opens.

>>144025
Make a youtube video shooting random shit on an alley and claiming that the other kids at school will pay for ignoring you

>>144025
Close the door. It's still too bright outside. Wait for night time and sob at the corner.

>>144028

You don't know what youtube is, but that sounds like an EDGY AS FUCK idea.

The handgun isn't loaded.

>>144035
Check the 15th pocket for bullets, or a stick of gum you can chew on

>>144035
Check the 21st pocket. Wait, is it... Another MAGICAL PEDO tarp of 66 pockets?
What the fuck?

File: humblefuckthat.png (13KB, 640x400px) Image search: [Google]

13KB, 640x400px

>>144033

You close the door, but the light burns you.

>>144036

You check the 15th pocket, finding a hardened stick of gum.

>>144045
Chew on the gum and pretend it's a puppy's brain, making you feel EDGY AS FUCK

>>144045
Step inside the chest, close it and think about your life until it's night time.

File: humblepedotarp.png (14KB, 640x400px) Image search: [Google]

14KB, 640x400px

>>144044

You don't remember having two of these. You don't remember these pockets being able to hold that much.

What the fuck do you have in the other pockets?

>>144050

You chew on the PUPPY BRAIN, feeling EDGY AS FUCK in the process.

Can life get any EDGIER?

>>144058
Close yourself in your chest and cry yourself to sleep, until it's nighttime

>>144045
Check the 33rd pocket. Inside is a autobiography on your times as a 14 year old... On Facebook. Many cringy times are to be had.

File: humbleHOLYFUCK.gif (61KB, 640x400px) Image search: [Google]

61KB, 640x400px

>>144052
>>144062

Suddenly, the chest becomes EDGY AS FUCK.

IT BITES YOUR FUCKING LEG OFF.

OW.

>>144063

You decide there are more pressing matters at hand.

Walk around town singing Linkin Park as loud as you can, If you forget some words just improvise with that bit from Disturbed's sickness.

>>144083
put chains on the chest and have him as your EDGY AS FUCK pet
and after you do this >>144085
go cry in a graveyard with your emo gang

>>144083
Pour the canteen on the chest. Make it pay for its insolence.

>>144090

You search your 66 PEDO pockets for chains.

You find some EDGY AS FUCK CHAINS, but the mimic is still EATING YOUR ASS.

>>144085

You don't think you can walk like this.

>>144095
kick its face repeatedly while screaming
"FUCK YOU DAD! I WANTED A WHITE IPHONE AND YOU GOT ME A BLACK ONE! FUCK YOU!"

File: humblebadsurvivalinstincts.gif (80KB, 640x400px) Image search: [Google]

80KB, 640x400px

>>144093

You poor water on the MIMIC, making it pay for its insolence.

The EDGY AS FUCK mimic does not slow it's assault.

>>144098
>>144097

>>144098
Tell it to piss off in the most Australian accent-- oh fuck it, just stab it.

File: humbleblinding.gif (48KB, 640x400px) Image search: [Google]

48KB, 640x400px

>>144097
>>144101
>>144104

You toss the canteen into the mimic's mouth and pull out your EDGY AS FUCK knife.

You STAB THE FUCKING MIMIC IN THE EYE.

TAKE THAT YOU FUCKING CHEST.

>>144116
Stab it until it's full of holes.

>>144116
Kill it to death

>>144116
KEEP STABBING IT YOU MONG, IT'S EATING YOUR FUCKING LEG

File: humbleEDGE.gif (93KB, 502x242px) Image search: [Google]

93KB, 502x242px

>>144121
>>144124
>>144128

Your unyielding desire to stab it awakens your EDGY AS FUCK HIDDEN POWER.

Three MAGIC AS FUCK knives shoot into the mimic from your eye.

>>144133
Make one of those cheesey one liners.

File: humblerko.gif (143KB, 640x400px) Image search: [Google]

143KB, 640x400px

>>144136

You KICK THE MOTHERFUCKER THROUGH THE WALL.

"FUCK YOU DAD! I WANTED A WHITE IPHONE AND YOU GOT ME A BLACK ONE! FUCK YOU!"

>>144148
Fuck the light jump through the hole!

>>144148
The 42nd pocket has sunglasses in them. Put them on.

File: humbleholeinthewall.png (46KB, 640x400px) Image search: [Google]

46KB, 640x400px

>>144153
>>144154

You use your EDGY AS FUCK powers to jump through the hole, putting on sunglasses in the act.

You feel BADASS AS FUCK.

>>144158
Cover yourself or else the sunlight might kill you

>>144158
The 12th pocket has a prosthetic leg. Put it on.

File: humblefreedom.png (29KB, 640x400px) Image search: [Google]

29KB, 640x400px

>>144163
>>144161

You tie your second MAGIC PEDO TARP OF 66 POCKETS around yourself, and adjust them into a hood.

Still falling, you reach into the 12th pocket and pull out a prosthetic leg.

You have no idea how these work, but you put it on anyways.

>>144173

gonna end it here for now, thanks for taking time out of your lives to be EDGY AS FUCK

>>144173
START A SCHOOL SHOOTING
but the gun is just your finger and your pew pew-ing them

>>144175
Thanks for being an EDGY AS FUCK OP

>>144175

going to sleep I mean-- continuing tomorrow