Chaos Quest

Voting for us to have electrical weapons, like tesla-wrist-cannons.

>>108087
I'm for the classical way of hitting things with oversized blunt weapons while shooting warpfire around.

We should also later in game dedicate us to a Chaos God to get immortality rolling.

Rolled 49 (1d100)

I want us to have a basket ball.

>>108087

An idea comes to your mind, why not give you and your soldiers some electrical weapons? You go to a heretek and tell him of the idea.

"Hmmm, very well my lord! I and my brothers will begin to work on it"

(Roll to see how good the weapons are)

Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>108138

Time to be Electro:

Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>108138
I assume we all roll.

>>108145

Thank you for that save roll anon.

>>108132

You also tell the hereteks to make some blunt weapons such as warhammers and maces that shoot out warpfire. And to make a basketball

"Will do my lord, but...what is a basketball?"

What now lord?

>>108150
All for chaos!

Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>108138

>>108153

> decide race

I mean, we do wear a mask.

>>108153
Where are we hanging around? Is there some small shrine world or so to set on fire?

>>108145
Good roll m8.

>>108050
Aww, I was planning to make a chaos lord quest. Oh well, hope this one turns out well.

>>108153
We can use the basketball to make awesome slamdunks on planets we conquer.

>>108153
It's a ball made from skin filled with air.

We should check on our squad and ready to attack something.

The hereteks call for you, saying that the electric weapons are completed. And woe behold they are high-quality. Chain-axes, chain-swords, and chain-fists all crackling with red lightning. Whole you see a powerfist with built in electricity firing cannons.

"Are they to your satisfaction?"

What now lord?

>>108165

To answer your question, you're just in the void of space right now.

>>108190
>>108164

> be secretly one of the last individuals of a close to extinct race that reigned before space tech

> be secretly scaven

>>108187

"Oh, and we made this....basketball you requested."

The heretek then hands you a medium sized ball made from flayed skin, and for some reason it appears to be glowing.

>>108190
Bring up an astral map of the current sector, and then decide from there which planet to attack.

>>108190
Bring me the most angry Khornate Juggernaught you can find maggot!

>>108190
Find a imperial world to raid.

>>108190

Lets find a planet with low to zero levels of civilization. Somewhere we can set up base.

>>108207
Do we get those things for ourself as undivided/undecided?

>>108200
Make two basketball teams

>>108215
Probably not, but it can be a test of our skills at the very least while attempting to break it in.

>>108200
Once we find a target we gear up and train our coordination.

Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>108233
O yeah we are meant to roll aren't we, whoops. Unless it's been by post number.

Rolled 90 (1d100)

>>108194

Screw it.

>>108290
OH SHIT BOI

>>108207
You then ask your heretek to bring you the angriest, most bloodthristy, most psychotic Kornate Juggernaught he can find.

>>108213
The Heretek brings up an astral map of a dead world that houses what you are asking for, and so you set course of the dead world of Carthus. Once you arrive you touch down with a squad each of cultists and tactical marines.

>>108290

And as it turns out, you are a descendent of a race that's close to extinct called the Haxsin. A race of psychic warmongers before the age of space tech.

What now lord?

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>108314
Set up base and ready a place for training.

Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>108314
Do the necessary steps to turn this into a daemon world

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>>108314

Ready some drilling machines so that we can start draining the power from this planet upon touch down.

Also, Capybara Quest is officially go people.

Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>108353

Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>108314
Have our Heritek scan the sector for nearby worlds.

Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>108314
Try and get a gift from a chaos god

>>108369

You order your soldiers to ready drilling machines to drain this dead planet of resources.

>>108379
And you ask your heretek to scan for nearby worlds. He does as asked, and has found three. A death world, an agri world, and another death world.

"Is there somewhere you wish to go after-" he's cut off by the sound of a roar. Seems the juggernaught has found you.

Act quickly

Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>108401
Charge the ball with electric power. Throw it at him telling him to pass it.

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>>108401

Ready our new electrical weapons.

Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>108401
Grab it's horn. Jump on.

(Pray to the dark gods this works)

Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>108401
Attempt to recruit him.

>108388

As luck may have it, a gift from the gods! You are given a daemonic weapon, an abyss black blade with no daemonic runes or anything on it.

>>108424

You head over to the Juggernaught and attempt to turn him to your side, the Khornate asks "BRING ME MY FILL OF BLOOD!! AND I WILL SERVE!!!"

What now lord?

File: baby_capybara.jpg (15KB, 236x214px) Image search: [Google]

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>>108424

chompers have dah bes peepol skillz.

Rolled 17 (1d20)

>>108463
YOU WILL HAVE YOUR FILL SOON FOR NOW, SLAUGHTER THE CULTISTS

Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>108463
>an agri world
Well we found a planet. It's time to slam them and get the blood we need.

Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>108463
Have him kill the cultists. Tell him he's our mount now afterwards.

>>108485
Also tell him this directly afterwards

>>108485

You tell the juggernaught about an agri world that you discovered, and ask him if that would sate his fill.

"MORE THAN SATE IT, WHAT DO YOU WISH OF ME?"

You then mount the juggernaught telling it, that you will use it as a mount. Then the drilling machines you requested appear and begin burrowing deep into the planet.

Suddenly a swarm of tyranids led by the Swarmlord itself, it roars and then a tide of homagaunts rush towards you.

Act quickly

Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>108546
Ride into battle with your new mount with the aid of the tactical marines.

Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>108546
From the back of the juggernaught holding the ball jump off to do a slam dunk on the Swarmlord. With our psychic warmonger blood we should be able to break the link to the hivemind with a good psi hit.

Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>108546
>Swarmlord
Fugggg you're shitting me.
Orderl the cultists to strap melta bombs to their backs and charge the Swarmlord while you and the tacticals deal with the Homagaunts

>>108558
>>108572

You order your cultists to strap melta bombs to their backs and charge in, they automatically do so and rush towards the hungry swarm with exploding bombs melting most of the hormagaunts.

Mean while you charge in on your new juggernaugjt mount with tactical marines providing fire support.

>>108571
With a bit of curiosity in mind, you leap off of your juggernaught with your basketball in hand, spinning in the air you roar out "CHAOS DUUUUUUUUUUUNK!!!!!" And smash the ball right onto the Swarmlord, causing a psychic shockwave.

It appears the Swarmlord has been broken off from the hive mind. Could it be tamable?

What now dunker lord?

Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>108602
Kill it and turn it's shell into a gift for your most devoted follower.

Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>108602
>Could it be tameable
Order your sorcerers to conjur the strongest binding chains in the Immaterium to pin the creature down.

Rolled 67 (1d100)

>>108629
Don't forget we also have a strong psi power in our blood.

Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>108602
Tame it.

Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>108629
Seconded

>>108629
>>108663
>>108731

You call for your sorcerers to bind the Swarmlord, combining the small bit of your psychic power and the sorcerers mastery, you and them summon chains that bind the Swarmlord. Though it appears to becoming corrupted by chaos and growing larger, the chains hold it in place.


What now lord?

Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>108764
Mop up any remains of the swarm that we don't have under control.

Then we take the planet for all it's worth.

Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>108764
Have one of our artificers create a Daemonic leash that allows us to command the Swarmlord.

>>108791
Agreed, I say we turn the planet into a massive shrine to chaos.

>>108831

You order a near by artificer to make a daemonic leash to tame the swarm lord. He does as commanded and after an hour he returns with a tendril like leash.

You whip it at the Swarmlord and a collar of fire wraps around the beasts throat, and it appears that it is nor alone in being tamed. Tyranids the Swarmlord brought with itself, including hormagaunts, rippers, a hive tyrant, a few lictors and genestealers, and carnifexes

>>108791

You then order the drilling machines to continue digging for resources. And order your cultists to start setting up shrines to one of the gods. This planet will be a massive shrine to chaos

Who do you want to dedicate the shrine planet too?

Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>108868
Khorne

>>108868
>>108881
Naturally

Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>108881
I can back Khorne we do have a planet to take soon.

>>108881
BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!

>>108923

You tell the cultists to dedicate this planet to Khorne, upon telling this your suddenly hit with a burst of absolute power. It seems you have been given the mark of Khorne in this.

Your juggernaught howls in approval in this

What now lord?

Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>109000
It's time. Gather our forces to launch a raid upon the Agriworld, taking no prisoners. Raze on of the cities to the ground

Ask our Juggernaught what his name is, preferably in a somewhat intelligible language

Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>109000
We pack up and ready our gear for attacking the planet.

>>109022

You gather up your forces and return back to the Scourge, you then set off to the agri world. After traveling you are in the atmosphere of the planet. With PDF scrambling to get ready

What now lord?

Rolled 4 (1d100)

>>109156
We send our Swarmlord, Charles, to start attacking one side. Then we drop off to flank the defenders. Gathering bodies to summon demons to aid in the attack. Using only the blood of fighters.

Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>109156
We rain down upon them in drop pods, scattering what remains after our assault. Then we along with our Swarmlord charge in to mop up the HQ

>>109481

You order marines to get into drop pods, raining down from the sky like a storm of death. The pods open up to bolter fire firing into the wall of PDF ripping them appart and hitting the civilians retreating behind them.

You and your Swaemlord charge into the HQ of the planetary governor. And rip him apart with your bear hands, while the Swarmlord cuts down anyone who tries to escape.

You gather up everyone on the planet into the city you are in, and in a sacrifice to Khorne. You kill them all making sure every drop of blood is spilled from their bodies.

And from the sacrifice comes Kharn the Betrayer. Who looks around in curiosity.

"Hello there! I see Khorne sent me to you, did you summon me?"

What now lord?

>>108170
>we can use the basketball to make slamdunks on planets we conquer. Absolutely the funniest shit I've heard today. Nice anon .

Rolled 82 (1d100)

>>109531
Aak for his help in conquering the rest of the sector in the name of the blood god.

Otherwise, challenge Kharn to a game of BLOOD SPILLING BASKETBALL OF CHAOS DOOOOOOOOM. Whomever spill the most blood from the other while playing wins the absolute favour of Khorne. Whomever loses will lose the favour of Khorne.

>>109577
Thanks anon.

>>108571
>>108413
>>108216
Hahaha Jesus these are killing me right now. XD XD XD

Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>109531
We persuade him in conquering the sector in the name of the blood god. Also, find the biggest, most fashionably outdated hat we can find and wear it proudly on our head.

>>109604

You walk forward to the chosen of Khorne and tell him thusly "COME WITH ME KHARN, HELP ME CONQUER THE REST OF THIS SECTOR IN THE NAME OF THE BLOOD GOD!!!!"

Kharn laughs jollily "Yes! Let's go spill blood in the name of-" he stops and realizes the Swarmlord is next to you. "Why hasn't this tyranid eaten you yet?"

>>109660

You wave your hand telling him you'll explain later, and then you see it. In a flash of old terran knowledge you know what it is. A giant mix between a top-hat, fedora, pope hat, and ivy cap. And this you place it ontop of your helmet proudly. Slannesh sees this, and is pleased

What now lord?

And I have to say, this is going great. Keep it up anons!

>>109715
Say that we are blessed to tame and let the swarmlord spilled blood for KHORN. Then conquer more sector. DOnt forget to put up shrines for papa nurgle.

we are chaos undivided ya?

Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>109727
forgot roll

Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>109715
We ask the Heretek to beam us up and plot a course for the closest planet, explain to Kharn that this Tyranid is a blessing brought by Khorn to help us conquer and kill.

Also, before you leave, ask the most vile, filthy plague marine in the warband to desecrate the plants crop, and offer up the now blighted crops to Nurgle as a token to his glory.

>>109744
This.

Rolled 76 (1d100)

>>109744
Doubles are truth

>>109737
>>109744

You tell Kharn that your warband has been blessed to tame and let the Swarmlord spill blood for Khorne. "Ah! Welcome to chaos friend!" he says to the Swarmlord, who just chits which may mean yes

And you go speak to your plauge marine Sansar. A rotting corpse constantly oozing pus and bile, warpflies flying around his head, jaw half hanging from his head, covered in tumors, cysts, and boils of all sizes.

You tell him to go desecrate this fertile worlds crops and offer them up to the plague father. He Happily complies and sets off, infecting every plant with plague.

And this does Nurgle give you a mark, and a message "I see you give me a fine crop harvest! Thank you child, and for such a gift. I lend to you an enhancement to your weapon. May you use it to bring rot to all!"

And thus does your daemonic sword gain a mark of Nurgle. You may have to find out what it does on the next planet

You go to your heretek and tell him to beam everyone up and plot a course to the next planet.

>>109830
Beam us up Skotti

>>109852
Kek

>>109830
We should send a detachment to gather resources from the death planet, then scan for other planets in the sector.

Rolled 36 (1d100)

>>109830
Send scouts ahead of us so that we know what we will be up against.

Also, have a Sorcerer send Lord Abbadon an astral projection showing all the loot you acquired, with a caption reading "It's this easy you armless fuck".

>>109906
Do it after the black crusade you egoist fuck

>>109906

Once back on your ship, you order your sorcerer to send Abbadon an astral projection. He does as commanded and a visage of Abbadon appears before you

"Ahhhh, I see you have plenty of tro-" you interuot him by saying "It's this easy you pathetic emo armless fuck. Call me when you can actually lead a crusade instead of being fucked over by one shithead"

>>109969
Lets hope this quest keeps him armless instead of the asskicker version from talon of horus.

Rolled 70 (1d100)

>>109950
>Implying we aren't building one up right now
We're an ambitious asshole after all.
>>109969
Just for posterity, send an apology note written on the flayed skin of a screaming cultist that says the commander had been snorting a bit too much Warp dust, and that he just wanted to say that he wishes you well as well as pledges his support for the next Black Crusade.

>>109983

He won't be armless anon, but he won't be the asskicker version. A semi-worthy opponent if you will for Belal

>>109999
You take a near by cultist and start flaying the skin off of his back, before using a quill made from his broken femur and writing an apology letter to Abbadon starting "Dear Abbadon, I would humbly like to apologize for what I said earlier to you. A Slanneshi cultist threw some warpdust into my face and wasn't thinking straight. I will fully support you in the next Black Crusade.
Sincerely,
Belal"

And you have a sorcerer send it to Abbadon. Kharn walks up to you "So! What palent are we heading to first?" he asks excitedly

What to do lord?

And with this post I head to bed, keep rolling anons. For I'll be back tomorrow after a while

>>109969
Continue to engage in JOLLY COOPERATION with Kharn

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>110237
We should search for planets with a good fight or possible recruits for the upcoming battles.

Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>110237
Shrug and yell at the Heretek where in the Warp we're going, and that we better get there faster if possible. We then go practice riding Juggy the Juggernaught about the training grounds before we rest for the next battle.

Good night OP! Hope this continues.

Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>110294
Also this, if we do in fact get a choice. Preferably a world with Abhumans like Ogryn.

Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>110237
Pleasure planet
Time to hatefucks people to death so semp-i mean slanessh will notice us more

Alright anons! Time to get this shit back on track

>>110317
You yell to your heretek where in the warp and Slannesh's nipples you're going. "We're heading to a titan forge world my lord! I know you wanted to go to a death world, but think of the possibilities!" you nod and tell him to carry on.

But you land on the second agriworld first, you then go to your juggernuaght Juggy "WHAT IS IT YOU NEED MASTER?" he asks you with you tell him you want to train on riding him.

He agrees and you mount up on him, though you have problems keeping hold and controlling at first. You quickly master riding your beast and return to your ship.

>>110360
You call up some Slanneshi cultists and marines who worship said god, telling them it's time for this world to be a pleasure world. They all cheer as you head of to various towns, doing every depraved thing you may possibly concede of doing rape, torture, the whole nine yards.

"Ohhhh baby, this show you're putting on is fun to watch! Please~ take some of my daemonettes and a mark of mine. Keep up the good work bug boy~" says Slannesh in your mind. Thus your daemon weapon gets a mark of Slannesh on it, still gotta test that out.

After all that your cultists prepare the ritual to turn this world to one for Slannesh, after a half-hour this world is now a paradise for those who worship hir.

What now lord?

>bug

Sorry, meant big. Shitty autocorrect

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>112442

Invest in genetic technology in an attempt to save our dying race.

Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>112442
Lets go find some people and things to test our weapon marks on.

Maybe set up a court to work on squad coordination after words.

>>112836

You decide it's about time to test these marks of yours. You find a local battalion of Imperial Guard, target practice

And first you activate your Slannesh mark, you see a brilliant pink flash of a slanneshi daemon prince before you. Before it suddenly the guardsmen are kneeling down before. Asking you to kill them

You then activate your Nurgle mark, like before it shows a daemon prince of Nurgle in a green flash. The guardsmen then start to rot rapidly with warpflies flying out from their bodies and starting to form a protective barrier around you

What now lord?

Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>113103
Probably best we hold off on the Khorne till a fight.

So that leave squad training with the electrical weapons we made and coordination to not hit each other. Possibly work on our psi control. Once that is done we are ready to attack on titan forge.

Rolled 31 (1d100)

Pray to the God's of Chaos to imbue the unholy bball "Doomdunk" with their blessings and power, so that we may slam many worlds in their honour.

Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>113103
Have our troops troops scour the planet and bring us back a young child, no older than 10 or so, one who's preferably a psyker.

>>113316

You begin praying to the gods to bless your basketball DoomDunk with their power. It would have been a mild enhancement, but thanks to your conquests for Slannesh, Nurgle, and Khorne they bless your ball with more of their powers than Tzeentch

>>113588

You order the marines you have to scour the planet for psyker children 10 or younger. They return after five hours with ten children, mostly 9 and 10

What now lord?

Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>113823
I'm not sure what to do with those kids. Split them into teams of 5? (Probably best I leave it to the one who asked.)

Well it has been bless so we best put it to the test. Our game can't be lacking for when we fight.

Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>113823
Good, we shall begin the process of training them as our personal guard, loyal only to us. Give them a speech regarding their new status and have them designated to be trained in grueling trials by Kharn.

Though, tell him to try not and kill them while we're at it, just...rough them up. Weed out the ones who are weak.

>>113951

You give a glorious speech telling of what the children will be, servants to you and Chaos.

You head over to Kharn and ask him to train the children, "You want me to train psykers? Hmmm, not sure how Khorne would feel." you tell Kharn that if a librarian can become a follower of Khorne though his bloodlust, why not a psyker? You add in to try and not to kill them, just rough them up

Kharn nods and brings the children aboard The Scourge to begin training,

What now lord? Maybe bring in a new follower from the warp? Perhaps a daemon prince

Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>114016
We desire a challenge, and more plunder. Tell the Heretek to plot a course immediately just outside the sectors warp lane and look for starships to prey upon.

Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>114016
Time for the attack on titan! If we don't have the crew lets find more to snacrifice.

>>114085

You decide it is time to take the forge world, you return to your ship and the sight of Kharn having the psyker children wrestle with him without using their powers.

You tell the heretek to plot a course for the forge world, after a brief trip you enter the forge world. And woe and behold, there are nine emperor titans readied to fire at you.

Act quickly lord, or else this is going to be bad

Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>114132
We have our ship shoot its entire payload at one of the Titans, lowering its void shields.

Then have our sorcerer somehow teleport us onto the bridge of said weakened Titan, killing the Princep inside.

Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>114132
I'm not familiar with the scale of the ships. We have a battle ship, I think.

So lets us the mark of Khorne and combo it with the warp drive to summon support.

Whoops the titans are ground unit aren't they. Well having back up from the warp should still help.

114204

You use your mark of Khorne combining it with the power of the warp engine to summon back up. It works, from the engine room come bloodthirsters and bloodletters all falling to the planet bellow to slaughter everyone and thing for Khorne.

Leading them are Angron and Doombreed themselves, each of the killing the crew of the titans until blood is flowing from the massive machines like they are bleeding onto the streets bellow.

In the streets, blood literally floods the streets and drowns everyone in it's wake. While daemons fight against the forces that protect the planet, you gain a mark of Khorne on you daemon sword.

You have won a forge world for your own use today

What now lord?

Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>114578
Plaster each titans with the mark of the chaos gods. give khorne extra 2 titans

Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>114578
While we give the titans a paint job. I think we should reinforce our troops with new gear (kicks).

Then we need to see about making more ships to join our battleship.

File: image.jpg (17KB, 200x150px) Image search: [Google]

17KB, 200x150px

>>114588

The blessing of Khorne comes for you this day! The titans are plastered with marks of the Khorne, while daemons posses the titans so they may function without a crew. "THE SLAUGHTER WAS GRAND THIS DAY MY CHAMPION, I NAME YOU BLOOD-FATHER. YOU CAN CALL UPON FORCES THAT ARE MINE WHENEVER YOU DESIRE" the psychic roars say. As you are given a pendant that is grafted to your helmet.

>>114618

You decide to give your troops some upgrades, after hours of hard work hereteks come with newly enhanced artificer armor with builtin flamers on the bottom of the boots, along with plasma guns in the toe and heel

What now lord?

Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>114797
Just a question OP.
Are we a daemon prince yet, if not, how long?

Time for tschneetz favors. Search for...tomes, artifacts and plan ahead to make yourself a warmaster/daemon prince of the Undivided

Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>114797
Check on Kharn and the psykic kids. Then bring up a map to check what planets are left of the sector to plunder. Make note of any astrates chapters or imperial forces that are in the sector. In addition, start establishing a defense force for the planets we conquered so that if we get summoned by abaddon for a crusade we have some reserves to protect our holdings.

Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>114824
I'll back it.

>>114797
Op you still alive?

>>115068
Op is dead
Lost in the warp
This is why you pray to bird-god for guidance,tszeetch

Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>115697
Then we will find him!

Quickly, to the bridge! Fire up the engines! Weve got a chaos lord to save!

Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>116123
I told you to pray to stzee...fuck his name is hard to spell.
O Birdgod, Hear my plea.
Give me a roll of 84 and let it save the chaos lord

Rolled 79 (1d100)

>>116395
>>116123
Tzeench conspires against us! WE MUST FIGHY BACK, NO MATTER HOW FUTILE! WE WILL FIND OUR LORD!

>>115068

Yes yes I'm alive just had sleep and to work on shit.

>>117872
OP returns

>>114817
Not a daemon prince, I have a plan to make you all something like Abbadon but more powerful.

You order your marines to take ships that are on the Forge World. They set out, and after a few days they bring back a bounty of tomes and books of chaos. Including one written by Erebus

>>114844

You go, back to the Scourge and see Kharn standing in front of the psyker kids. Who seem to have rapidly aged "Remember children" he starts to say "Khorne cares not from where the blood flows, only that it flows" you shrug and bring up a map of the sector, seems that quite a number of forces are in the area.

Among them are Eldar, Ultramarines, Black Templars, Dark Angels, and Salamanders. You then order your hereteks to head to the worlds you have conquered and reinforce them. After a week they return with the worlds fully prepared against attack

What now lord?

Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>118880
>Salamanders
I think we should go for them first.

>>119280

You figure the first target should be the Salamanders, you head to a feral world that currently holds them.

What now lord?

(Also going to change the rules a bit. If you roll a 100 an action is blessed by all the gods, and rolling a 11 will get you dicked over by Malal.)

>>119434
Can we get the swarmlord to start trying to infect it with tyrannids?

Rolled 22 (1d100)

>>119434

Request the heretek to make a codpiece that release flame.

Then you taunt the Salamander by proudly showing your flaming codpiece.

Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>119509
That could work. Make them think Tyranid are trying something and fight us with different gear.

Rolled 7 (1d20)

>>119538
edgy m8

Rolled 1 (1d100)

>>119549
shit, fuck i forgot this is 1d100

>>119559
Did... Did the salamanders just fucking tame OUR swarm-lord?

>>119559
The dice are not kinda at the moment.

Eh we could use challenge.

>>119559
Awww shit

No worries anons, I will show you mercy. Besides, Salamanders must be killed by fire dick. I will provide a REAL challenge later. But for now, deal with this mwahahahahahahaaa

>>119529

You order your heretek to make a flaming codpiece, after a minute or two he returns with the device. You strap it on and start air humping with fire coming out

The Salamanders see this, and start to open fire on you. Both literally and with bolters, you get your arms shot off. You think, well shit: seems I'm on my way to being Abbadon.

What now lord Abb-Belal?

Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>119821
Call in a titan drop and keep on fighting. We got those new kicks for a reason. Use that cannon and flamer.

Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>119821
>>119912
I support this. And after the battle, see if we can reattach our arms. If we cant, then we have the Heretek make new arms for us that can be upgraded later.

Rolled 8 (1d100)

OP, for the sake of my sanity, tell me that we slam dunked the titan planet after we conquered it. If not, we will have to go back. DoomDunk thirsts to claim the should of the conquered.

Regarding the arm situation, rolling to use our psy-powers to imbue them with energy and tear the Salamanders apart with them. After they're dead, offer their blood to Khorne and ask him to grant our arms be healed to tear our enemies asunder in his name!

Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>120050
*souls of the conquered

>>120061

There there anon, we dunk all the planets we conquer. Anyways

You are suddenly visited by Tzeentch, finally. "Ahhh! Haxsin huh? Well then! I give you full access to your psyker potential, and my mark" he says before vanishing.

Your daemon sword now had the full set of daemonic marks besides undivided. Anyways, you use your own psychic power on the Salamanders causing them to start killing one another with bolter, chainsword, and flamer. All of them frying out why are they doing this before being killed.

"KHORNE, I OFFER YOU THE BLOOD OF THESE FIRE LOVERS. IN EXCHANGE, GRANT ME NEW ARMS!!!!" you cry out. Your prayers are answered when two bionic arms are given, one that looks like it has the Talon of Horus on it and the other seemingly like a regular human arm made of black adamantium.

"Why did this have to happen of me? I served under Bale and just when I become a daemon prince I'm sent to the warp. And now I'm inside someone's arm? Wonderful" you hear a voice say
"I am Sindri Myr, at your service"

What now lord?

Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>120199
We kill any of the remaining Salamanders and scour the planet for potential recruits.

In the meantime, tell my arm to quit whining and have it outfitted with a Daemonic Storm bolter, imbued to fire Warpfire rounds.

Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>120242
Sounds fun.

Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>120242
Backing this.

Also, make plans to reinforce this planet. Start gaining intel on the forces of the dark angels. Maybe they are here for reasons other than purging heresy and xenos.

AKA hopefully we can send out a fake report of a fareaway fallen once we gain intel on them.

>>120242

You quit your arm to quit being a bitch and outfit you with a daemonic storm bolter with warpfire rounds. He sighs "Your wish is my command" he says as your talon arm gains storm bolter barrels coming from the top of the wrist.

You then set off with your guard of psyker children, marines, Kharn and Swarmlord to purge the planet of Salamanders. "HERETICAL SCUM! PURGE THEM IN THE NAME OF THE EMPEROR AND VULKAN!!" one cries out as combined heavy flamer and bolter fire cause a hail of hot ordinance to sail past your warriors as you dive for cover.

You then see two predator tanks come rolling in and start firing at you, with a few shells hitting some swarms of Tyranids the Swarmlord brought with it.

What now lord? Test the adamantium arm?

>>120423

Soon you will learn

>>120199
Oh Shit! We got Abaddon's arms from Abaddon Quest!

Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>120540
Aw yes test the new arm.

>>120678

You stick your adamantium arm forward and it rapidly stretches to the predator, and it seems you absorb it. And your arm turns into the barrel of the predator.

With your new toy you begin laying waste to all the Salamanders and their vehicles. After the battle Kharn comes to you "Khorne damn me that was amazing!" he holds out his fist ready for you

What now lord? Don't leave Kharn hanging

Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>120704
Fist bump and slam dunk this planet.

Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>120704
Brofist Kharn.

Conquer the planet in the name of chaos undivided. Then do what I suggested before.

Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>120736
Backing this aswell.

>>120758
Whoops, forgot I rolled already. Disregard this one if you want to.

>>120736
>>120739
>>120742
>>120758

Summoning all the power you can, you brofist Kharn which the combined greatness of you two causes a chaos mutating shockwave that spreads through put the planet. "YES!!" Kharn cries out laughing before running off to kill Salamanders

Mean while you mount Juggy "ARE WE DOING IT?" He asks as you nod "GO FOR IT!!" you then ride Juggy across the planet until you both jump off a mountain with you then leaping of Juggy

"CHAOS DUUUUUUUUUUUNK!!!!!!!!!" and with it the Ruinous Powers bless basket ball with all the power they have, once you slam your ball to the ground the planet your on breaks into fourths, held together by a blackhole of warp energy in the middle of where the planet's core once was.

"I CLAIM THIS IN THE NAME OF CHAOS UNDIVIDED!!!!"

What now Lord Belal, the Kamina?

>>120852
We did it, gentlemen. We have successfully dunked a planet into the chaos side.

Now, lets get planning on how to get rid of the other nuisances across the sector. Also build a defence for this world as we did with the others.

>>120891

Forgetting something dear anon? And please, allow me to say this: you are all great for doing this.

>>120937

And now I go to bed, I'll be back tomorrow. Keep rolling you magnificent bastards. Go more crazy than a Khornate on crack

Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>120937
Oh yeah, forgot to roll. Thanks OP. Also, thanks for doing this quest. Were having alot of fun so far.

>>120945
Night OP.

Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>120891
Yup.

>>120945
Later.

>>120949

Gonna do this before I go. Because I love this quest along with you guys

You order everyone to start building defenses on what you now dub "The Four corners of Chaos". Each having their own defenders: One quarter Khornates ready to fight against worthy opponents, and willing to train whelps into lords of carnage, another quarter a plagued and decayed realm for Nurglites, another random and strange place for Tzeentchians, and finally a fleshy pink place for Slanneshi worshipers.

The defenses are set on what is a glorious vision of chaos undivided.

What now lord?

Alright, time for me to go. Night all, and keep on rolling

Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>120995
Night OP, and thanks a million. Your dedication to this quest is always welcome compared to all the quests that get abandoned half way through.

As for what to do next, we get a status update on our other worlds as well as send out a scouting force to see what we will face on the next planet.

>>120937
>>120945
>>120852
>>120995

Ask our artificer to craft us a pair of Pimp Shades to commemorate this glorious event. We also shall give ourselves the nickname "The Dunkmaster".

Then scout the sector for the planet of our next prey.

>>121013
Forgot to roll, anon.

Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>121013
Forgot roll

>>121018
Good roll.

>>120995
I love being an Undivided champion,even if i always favor Papa Nurgle.
Thanks OP

Rolled 69 (1d100)

Evil plan summary:
>Make it our personal mission to use DoomDunk to trap the souls of as many of our enemies and victims as possible, all across the galaxy, for the glory and entertainment of Chaos Undivided.
>To this end, contact our hereteks and sorcerers, to look into developing it into some sort of pocket plane/portable hell/dungeon of souls.
>Try to spread the legend of the great Lord Malal and his hellish basketball across the Imperium. We want them fearing that we will dunk the Emperor himself.
>As part of our legend become known by many names, such as The Dunkmaster (as >>121013
suggested), Balal the Soul Slammer, and The Two-Point Scourge.

>>122700
*Belal
Malal is a different Chaotic entity entirely...

>>121013

You ask the artificer to craft you a pair of pinping shades to commemorate what has heppened fhis day. "At your command Dunkmaster!" and after a few hours of crafting you are given a pair of shades that commemorate the gods.

A pair of shades pointed four different ways, one direction red, the other green, another purple, the next one blue. And in the center it is black as the abyss.

>>122700
>>121009

You head back to the Scourge to check on the status of other worlds. It seems the Dark Angels, Ultramarines, and Black Templars are fortifying the worlds they are currently on while Salamanders are pulling out of the sector.

Mean while, it seems the Eldar are...no they're at your location right now. Because a Banshee has decided to stab you right in the back with a wraithbone sword. You see everyone fighting against Dark Reapers, Fire Dragons, Warp Spiders, Farseers and many other things you can't currently see due to the blade obstructing your view.

Maybe an opportunity to get some honors from Slannesh? Taking Eldar captive? What to do Soul Slammer, what to do?

And if anyone here is a drawfag, please! Draw dear Belal to your hearts content and show everyone

Rolled 36 (1d100)

>>123009
Sure. Get some hot knife ear for Slaneesh. and few for the rest of the gods. Wonder how tattoing runious power affect them

Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>123009
We mount our Juggernaught and run rampant on these knife ears, make sure to take the Farseer hostage via a Sindri-powered bitch slap to the face. We shall have...fun with her later.

>>123488

You mount up on Juggy and invoking the mark of Khorne your sword has, you become a frothing at the mouth berserker as you ride in splitting knife ears in half or sending their heads flying off their bodies with blood spraying everywhere.

However some lucky Ranger manages to get a shot on you, or vindicare? You don't know, as you quickly make a pray to the gods telling them to have some of the Eldar that were slain: you see an avatar of Khaine looming over you.

"By my bloody-hand you shall not live past this day"

Hurry Belal, or be turned to cinders by elf murder god.

Also as a little bit of insight on your psychic powers. You make an alpha plus psyker look pathetic in comparison.

>>123549

So please, go wild with the psychic power you have

Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>123567
Bloody hand? Use our psyker powers to give the bastard a bloody everything. Pull him apart, and throw the pieces at our foes!

>>123672

You can only smile, if he wants blood. He's got it: you start using your psychic power to hold the avatar still, you use the being's sword to impale it right through the chest.

Then as it bursts to pieces you redirect the shards to take down squads of dark reapers, fire dragons, and warp spiders. Leaving only Banshees, the Farseer and other Eldar forces.

However seeing their god of war be destroyed has diminished their hope of victory. "Chaos worshiping fools, the Eldar will destro-" the farseer began to say before taking a smack by your talon arm containing Sindri

"Ohhhh yes that felt good, I had to deal with them once. They helped me get to where I am right now."

What now lord? Have 'fun' with the farseer? Maybe convert Eldar to chaos

Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>123795
If it's possible, use some combination of psyker corruption powers, creating a sorcerous collar like for the Tyranid, and general threatening to make this guy our pet Farseer. He can join our coven of sorcerers, and help us dream up interesting new ways to lay waste to the galaxy.

Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>124025

Also, on the side, we need to start investing our new-found resources into trying to save our secret, dying rodent race.

>>124063

Sure, but as a note. The Haxsin are like reptiles and such, aka Lizardmen. But yeah subspecies are like Skaven, which leads to near genocidal wars with one another

>>124025

You begin channeling your own psyker powers and begin to whisper things into the Farseer's mind.

"You are wasting your potential, Chaos is the one true answer. Do you desire love and excess? Endless war and bloodshed? Acceptance and an inability to die? Or knowledge and secrets? Just allow me to be your nee master, and I will grant these things too you."

The Farseer tries resisting but she is clearly breaking "I.....will....not.....falter!" you snarl and order a sorcerer to craft a leash like for the Swarmlord.

He soon returns, you take the leash and start whipping her roaring out "OBEY! OR I WILL SEND YOUR SOULS TO SLANNESH!" and after seven agonizing whips you place the leash around her neck. "What......is.......your desire my lord?" she asks

"Tell me your name" you ask smiling "M-M-Macha" she says in a stutter. You order the marines to gather up the Eldar and take them back to the Scourge. Then Kharn walks up to you

"Well! That was really fun! Fought knife ears, enslaved them, and now we can use them as pawns and slaves!" he laughs holding his fist out for you

What now lord?

>>124156
Make an example of one of the Rangers who shot you, tear out his soulstone and crush it into fine powder for She Who Thirsts to enjoy.

Then tell Macha to lead us to a Webway portal, perhaps we can lure some more of her kind in ambush, maybe even capture an Eldar of great importance.

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>124196
Oops, forgot Muh roll

>>124156

Rape Macha as tribute for Slaneesh.

Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>124220

Rolls...

>>124196

You figure that you need to find the ranger who shot you. And so you begin a search for him, easily enough he tries shooting you again but you see him and begin to chase after him

He keeps shooting you until you finally grab him by the throat and carry him to the Eldar you have. "Let this be an example to any of you who think of rebelling, She Who Thirsts is always hungry." you say as you crush the rangers spirit stone "NO NO NO NOOOO!!!!" he cries out as a warp portal takes him away.

"Now Macha, lead me to a webway portal." You command her as she nods. You and your group begin walking and walking not seeing anything yet

Until you finally see a webway portal ready for use.

>>124220

Then as an offering to Slannesh you begin to rape Macha, she feels like a vice, virgin, perfect. You keep raping Macha for hours and hours on end until you finally stop when you fill her tomb with plasma.


Now for the ambush! Roll for how good the ambush is, and who you catch.

Rolled 4 (1d100)

>>124156
Brofist Kharn, slamdunk planet, use bad boi charm to waifu Macha.

Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>124273
Oops, too late.

>>124267
Rolling for someone important.

Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>124267

Our ambush is good as or superior than Alpha Legion.

>>124281
>>124283

You lay out your trap for the poor Eldar who will come though the gate and become slaves. You settle out on a ridge with tacticals in wait ready to strike. And then the portal opens up to bring another Farseer, judging by her colors she appears to be from Ulthwe.

Then something surprises you, you see the new farseer hug your waifu Macha. Now maybe the time for answers and you spring the ambush! The marines gun down the guardian squad sent with the Ulthwe eldar

"What is the meaning of this? What have you done to my sister!" she angrily cries out at you with Sindri groaning some "My lord, it appears that our captive has relatives....figures things would be more complicated than they should be"

What now lord?

Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>124356

Once again offer the tribute to Slanessh by raping Macha (again) and her sister.

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>124356
Shackle the new farseer. They can form our deadly coven of eldar farseeer-witches. Also double-waifu for Belal.

>>124377
>>124383

You smile to yourself "Time for an offering to Slannesh" you say as you start raping Macha and her sister at the same time, raping the mind for the sister as well to make her a mewling slave.

Two days of rape later both are filled up, and kissing one another. You use another leash given by your sorcerer and attach it to the other farseer.

"Now, care to share your name eldar?" you ask with a smile.

"Taldeer" she simply says, before everyone returns to the scourge with Kharn wanting a brofist from you.

What now lord?

>>124553
Brofist Kharn. Slam dunk everything we've conquered recently. Start looking into building a colony, to start our empire of Chaos.

Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>124620
Forgot to roll.

Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>124553
Brofist everyone and slap some slaneesh mark on the eldars.

Hope my wifi is stable now

>>124632
>>124818

You gather everyone around and order them to have their fists held out. Then you brofist everyone: Kharn, Angron, the marines, the hereteks, the bloodthirsters, the bloodletters, the depaemonettes, your plague marines, your sorcerers, the keeper of secrets, and Sindri. "OW!" he says repeatedly as you brofist everyone then him.

After that you bitch slap the Eldar with marks of Slannesh onto their bodies.

You then start going back to every world you conquered and dunk them. The forge world becomes one massive fortress of weapons of all kinds, the two agriworlds become a plague world and pleasure world, while your Khorne worship world turns into a world of knee deep blood, fire and brass.

You then decide to start colonies on each of them, sending vox messages to all chaos worshipers to come to the Irrumno sector and set up shop

One it is sent you see ships coming from the warp and vox messages are coming in from many different people. Ahzek Ahriman, Typhus, Lucius, Eliphas the Inheritor, Huron Blackheart himself, and whole legions including the Night Lords, Emperor's Children, Thousand Sons, Death Guard, and Word Bearers.

What now sector lord?

Rolled 70 (1d100)

>>124919
Host a tournament to select the finest warriors and psykers of chaos. We will lead the winners on a glorious crusade to spread terror to the heart of the Imperium in the name of the chaos gods (after equipping them in some swanky kit from our forge world of course).

This system will be the heart of our new Empire... We should build a throne to rival that of the Emperor.

(Don't really know if I need to roll for this, but just in case...)

>>125060

You suddenly have a great idea! A tournament for warriors and psykers who are coming here, and leading the winners on a crusade through imperial space.

You fire up the vox messenger and start speaking. "Attention everyone! A tournament is being held upon the Four Corners of Chaos! The finest warriors and psykers may join, and the winners get fine gear from the forge world! And then we shall rampage across imperial space too cause terror in the name of the gods! Now come, and fight like there is no tomorrow!"

The message ends and practically every ship comes to the quartered up world, and even from the void of space...it's like seeing ants scrambling around.

"Hello there my new found friend" a voice says, you turn to see that it's Huron Blackheart "Mind if I just watch? And maybe we can strike a deal?"

Now anons, please decide where this glorious tournament will take place on the Four. And how the game ends

And before you ask or roll on it, Huron will be watching with us and basically making deals with us

Enough talk now, time for choosing. And may chaos bless you all, hope you all are still enjoying this quest

Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>125242
The tournament shall be held at the base of gigantic mountain, with the contestants having to survive climbing up it, all while all manner of vile creatures rain down to oppose them. Once they reach the top, they shall enter the arena proper, a blood soaked stadium dedicated to Chaos undivided. There, they shall play games of Chaos Basketball, Bloodbowl, Ultimate Death Parcheesi, with the intermissions of course filled with the old Gladiatorial death match or two. The tournament shall go on for 3 days.

Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>125344
I couldn't come up with anything better.

>>125344

You sir win the tournament design. Now who will be the announcer? I'll give you options


Araghast
Tuska the Daemon-Killa
Doomrider
Lorgar
Or a hilarious bloodletter named K'okas

Also, let there be noise marines playing music. Metallica, Judas Priest, dubstep, and AC/DC

>>125419
Doomrider is a performer in the Gladiatorial matches. Tuska shall be the half time entertainment.

Araghast shall be the announcer, along with Eliphas. The bants shall be glorious.

>>125427

This is perfect now to begin.

"Yes, come sit with me Huron" you say as Huron sits next to you "Hm, you have a fine set up going here for an empire" he says with you nodding before speaking into your vox speaker

"Everyone! You must head to the largest mountain on the planet, then and there you must climb up the mountain for the first challenge. And some.....surprises may appear as you climb the mountain"

After hours upon hours of walking everyone appears before a mountain that makes the Himalayas of earth seem like hills. "What is this garbage?" Ahriman mutters as Typhus and Lucius just look to one another,

"Brothers hear me!" A voice yells out "I am Araghast the Pillager! Master of Hounds! The Lash of the Black Legion! And I shall be your announcer! Along with fuckingtrairotousshit Eliphas the Inheritor."

"Yes...we shall look forward to seeing you all compete for Chaos and our new lord Belal." Eliphas says

"Now you all shall climb this mountain! Hurry up and do it!" Araghast says "Don't be like Araghadt and die" "YOU TRAITOROUS DOG!!!" and thus began a fist fight between Eliphas and Araghast

And then everyone began to climb, some people falling down from the height. And by some it means thousands of cultists and psykers

Now roll to see what will meet our competitors climbing up the mountain

Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>125508
Come on and slam.

Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>125508
Something choppy I hope. Maybe open a portal to...I don't know, Octarius? Let's see what comes through?

>>125550

As everyone keeps climbing one cultist sees a portal open up "Umm, what is a portal doing-" he's suddenly interrupted by a round straight to the chest and a fall followed by "WAAAAAAAAGH!!!" and millions of orks begin plummeting "It seems the Octarius sector has been opened to." Eliphas says begrudgingly says "Yes, to bad Bale isn't here. I would want to make him kowtow to these certain creatures. Wouldn't you Eliphas?" "Yes Araghast, I would very much enjoy it"

"TZEENTCH'S BIRD BALLS!!" Ahriman yells out

"SLANNESH'S NIPPLES!!" Lucius cries out

"NURGLES ROTTING PUS COVERED DICK!!" Typhus yells out, thankfully Ahriman creates a psychic shield that protects them from falling orks.

"DAT'S CHEATIN' YA PANSY GIT!!" yells out one ork, who is it? It's Tuska the Daemon-Killa! "BUT I'LL LET YA HAVE DIS ONE RHIMAN, BUT NEXT TIME I'LL CRUMP YA GOOD IF YA DO DAT AGAIN!!" he says as he starts running backwards up the mountain "COME CATCH ME CHAOS BOYZ!!!!"

After hours upon hours of climbing later, the contestants fall down into the arena bellow. Where crowds cheer, a section filled with Khornates are frothing at the mouth with excitement before one is knocked into the arena by Angron

Another is filled with Slanneshi banging and dojng drugs, with Fulgrim drinking a glass of wine while snorting cocaine off a daemonette's tits.

The next row is filled with Nurglites who are clapping and throwing disease ridden flesh into the arena: with Mortarion watching in silence

The one after that is a row filled with Tzeentchians placing bets on who's going to win, while Magnus is giving the finger to Ahriman

And in the center of it a tower with word bearers and Iron Warriors, with Lorgar and Perturabo watching intently

"WELCOME TO THE SECOND PART OF THE TOURNAMENT!! THE ARENA!!!!" Eliphas and Araghast roar out as the crowd explodes with excitement.

Pick the teams for CHAOS BASKETBALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!

Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>125668
First team shall be composed of Slaaneshi daemons and Noise Marines, lead by Lucius, they shall play Ahriman and his Tzeentch team of Rubics and Horrors.

Doombreed and his bloodletters star as the Khorne team, to play the Nurglites lead by Typhus, who have an exceptionally large team thanks to some rather well timed victums of the Plague of Undeath.

There's also one team composed of mostly Cultists and Mutants numbering in the hundreds, who are to go up against 5 Chaos Terminator, who insist that it's only fair that they play with only one free arm. How kind of them

Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>125668
Parge'tzor Ballers

Kurna'tzor Bloodletters

Barbaruman Raiders

Gustur Raptors

>>125747

You made me laugh with the terminators vs. cultists and mutants anon. Good job!

>>125760

Before I start, which team is which? I know the Kurna'tzor Bloodletters are for Khorne. What about the rest there?

>>125783

Nevermind I think I know. Barbruman Riaders- Nurgle
Parge'tzor Ballers-Tzeentch
Gustur Raptors- Slannesh.

Right?

>>125801
I will say yes. I was just trying to make up a few names quickly.

>>125808

Ok, let's get started


As Belal gave his beloved DoomDunk to the ground for pick up he had to say one thing "If anyone pops my ball, the gods won't save you!"

And as he walked off the roar of an engine came to life, as Doomrider picked the ball up "I DO COCAAAAAAAAAAAINE!!!!!!" and thus the Slanneshi cheered and jizzed.

"THE FIRST TEAM COME FORTH!!! WELCOME LADIES, GENTLEMEN AND HERMS THE PARGE'TZOR BBBBBBBBALLLLLLLEEERRRRRRRSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!" He cried out as "Where da hood at" and "Master of Puppets began playing as the team stepped forward, led by Ahriman: The team had Rubrics, horrors, and one Salamander with a "WE IZ KANGZ" jersey on

"THEIIIIIIIIRRRRRRR OPPONENT!!!!! THE SLUTY SLAMMERS, THE GUSTUR RAPTORS!!!" and Lucius and his team stepped forward, trying not to bang one another: Noise Marines and daemonettes make up this team

"ON THE OTHER SIDE, THE BESERK BALLERS, THE KILL-CRAZED KILLERS, THE KURNA'TZOR BLOOOOOOOOODLETTERRRRRRRRRS!!!!" and like a football team bloodletters spewed forth, led by Doombreed as he stroked his Fu Man Chu mustache as Highway to Hell plays

"AND NOW, THE SICKLY SLAMMERS, THE PLAGUED POINT TAKERS, THE BARBARUMAAAAAAAAN RAIDERRRRSSSSSS!!!!!" and like a zombie movie, victims of the plague of undeath shambled forward led by Typhus screaming "WATCH ME PAPA NURGLE!!" while The Hellion plays

"And then theres a team of mutants and cultists against terminators." Doomrider hurriedly says as he points to a bunch of shaking cultists and mutants, and flexing terminators.

"NOW, TIME FOR CHAOOOOOOOOOOS BASKETBALLLLLLLLLL!!!!" Doomrider says as he tosses the gall into the air.

It's already neck and neck! Daemonettes trying to blow bloodletters for the ball but it only gets their heads ripped off, while Doombreed and Lucius play keep away from one another. And with a steal Doombreed slams the ball into the post!!

Then as zombies are trying to catch Ahriman who's simply floating around like an unfair cunt. Just as he's about to drop the ball in "CHEATIN YA GIIIIIIIIT!!!" Tspuska roars as he drops Ahriman to the ground allowing Typhus to shoot and score!

Meanwhile the Salamander is in the hands of terminators who have ripped him to pieces while the chuckle to the cultists and mutants: "Ding, ding!" thus the cultists and mutants killed themselves to save themselves the trouble. And the terminators began swishing and scoring.

"AAAAND THE WINNERS OF THIS MATCH ARE, NURGLITES AND KHORNATES!!!" Doomrider cheers out with the crowd going electric as Khornates beat on one another, Nurglites start vomiting in joy, Tzeenchians scram in frustration and Slanneshi are out of their high

"It appears that the Khornates are especially happy with their win, aren't they Eliphas?" "Yessss, and the Nurglites are loving their victory too. A little....to much." "Anyways, intermission!" The two announcers say

Next up Bloodbowl! And a special guest will appear for this one, so place your guesses as the teams set up.

Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>125944
Is it Belakor?

Also, good to see this quest is alive and good. Thanks OP.

>>125944
This
>>126227

Maybe along with a band of Noise Marines?

Goddamn it, is the OP lost in the warp again?

>>129221

Calm down anon, just been sick is all. And need sleep, but I'm back

A sort of screaming roar comes from out of no where, with everyone in the arena looking around for the source: and thus did Belakor come from the earth

"I wish to join this game! It seems well and good enough, and I have time to spare for the likes of all of you"

Alright new contender in the game. So pick the teams for bloodbowl, but don't make it like the last teams: mix them together a bit

>>129771
Have the players pick limbs from a barrel, if we need for teams they can be the left-hands, the right-hands, the left-foot, and the right-feet.

If we only need two teams it's hands vs. feet.

Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>129860
Yeah like a skin vs shirt game. Probably mix the people of last game into. First place and last. Then second and third.

>>130137
Yeah exactly, in fact once they've selected teams from the limbs barrel, one team in each game can wear enemy skins AS shirts to help distinguish teams with these mixed factions.

Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>129860
>>130137
Supporting.

Also, we might need to make a new thread since this one is on autosage death.

Bump until OP opens a new Warp rift

>>133035
Bump.

OP, link us to the next thread if you make one.