Thread replies: 34
Thread images: 14
Thread images: 14
>Be Jeb Bush
>wake up in the morning
>feel depressed and empty
>sit up and open nightstand drawer
>pull out loaded .22 handgun and stick the barrel in my mouth
>suddenly remember today is Sunday Funday
>smile rushes to my face
>put gun back in drawer
>not today
>run downstairs
>Columba is standing in kitchen
>“Buenos dias, Jeb. Today will be an extra special Sunday Funday because I invited one of your friends to join us!”
>she points to the kitchen table
>Donald Trump is sitting at the table pouring cereal into my favorite guacabowle
>“Good morning, Jeb. I like your pajamas” says Trump
>realize I’m still wearing my one-piece footie pajamas with turtle patterns
>"h-h-hi Donald"
>embarrassed
>“Hey, Jeb, could you please bring me the milk?” asks Trump
>take milk out of refrigerator and walk towards table
>trip on my toy turtle that I left on the floor last night
>fall down and spill milk all over the floor
>lying in a puddle of milk
>Columba screams “ay dios mio, Jeb! I told you to put your turtles away after you’re done playing with them”
>she takes off one of her shoes and begins spanking me with it
>curl into fetal position
>start crying
>Columba tells me to go upstairs for 15-minute timeout
>run upstairs
>get my gun
>aim it at my head
>pull trigger
>wake up in hospital 3 days later
>Donald Trump sitting at foot of my bed
>ask him what happened
>he tells me the bullet didn’t kill me
>“how could I survive a headshot point blank?” I asked
>Donald Trump smiles and says:
>“the bullet you used was low energy”
>mfw
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Oh fuck my sides
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>>61051840
nice
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>realize I’m still wearing my one-piece footie pajamas with turtle patterns
Lost my shit right there.
>>
>>61051840
Kek, he's so incompetent he can't even kill himself.
>>
>>61051840
bretty good
>>
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>>61051840
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>>61051840
>no mention of tendies
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>>61051840
>>
As bad as things get for you, always remember...
You are not Jeb Bush.
>>
>>61052552
next time
>>
>>61051840
>sunday funday
>>
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>>61053059
Still, fucking glorious, OP
>yeb
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>>61051840
I'm so glad Bush hasn't dropped out. I want this to go one forever. If only Trump and Bush could be in the general election.
>>
On mobile someone pls screencap
>>
Does someone have the one where Jeb tries to murder Trump but then kills himself instead
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>>61051840
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>>61053562
This. Plz, lads
>>
Does anyone have the link to Hurt?
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>>61051840
>>Columba screams “ay dios mio, Jeb! I told you to put your turtles away after you’re done playing with them”
>>she takes off one of her shoes and begins spanking me with it
Not even Yeb can escape la chancla
>>
Please stop guys, I feel really sorry for the guy
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>>61051840
Capped.
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LAWL
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>>61054781
You're a hero, anon.
>>
>Be me have hangover
>Decide to stop at a bar early for a caesar
>Bar is empty except for one guy in a hoodie huched over sadly over a bowl of gauc.
>order my cure see the tv showing the latest republican polls
>feeling sorry for the sad hoodie guy try to start a conversation.
>say hey guy Trump is at 43% can't stump the Trump eh?
>Hoodie guy says softly "he's a bully" Sobs "and your a bully too/
>he starts crying snatches his bowl and runs to the bathroom.
>I am feeling pretty bad so I go to apologize see if he needs any help.
>hear him in the bathroom repeating " slow and steady" over and over.
>Concerned I walk in.and see him by the sink.
<he is pulling baby turtles out of his pockets and crushing thim in the guac bowl one by one with his bare hands.
>I am frozen in shock and fear as he turns his Thumb bleeding heavy.
>He laughs and asks want to try my famous Guac?
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>>61051840
Damn
10/10
>>
What do you think Sunday Fundays are like with his Goblin wife?
Do you think she lets Jeb invade her Booty Bay on Sunday Funday?
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Wanna no something funny? I'm actually a private escorts of jebs, and what I've seen this man do would make grown men cry, AMA.
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>>61053553
. . . This is possible. If Jeb wins the primary, then Trump could make his own MAGA party. wait whaaaa
>>
>>61057672
is he cucked?
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>>61051840
>>61051840
>>61051840
>>61051840
>>61051840
ARCHIVE
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>>61051840
God speed anon
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>>61053351
what a yapper
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>>61056166
chuckled 4 times. good read
Thread posts: 34
Thread images: 14
Thread images: 14