AUSTRALIA

>>136429113
Why didn't you archive? https://archive.is/CdRCS

Crazy cunts

>melbourne

FUCK

>>136429113
Oh HELL no

>>136429113
Could've been worse. Could've got his dick or asshole.

>>136429113

Can we put this in the Flint water?

>>136429514
that would be animal cruelty

>>136429113
That's what you get for living in Melbourne.

>>136429113

How could we spread this around the world? Just for knowledge, of course.

>>136429113
Maybe /an/ knows?
It sounds like this may be some new undiscovered parasite though if marine biologists couldn't identify them.

>>136429561

I assure you, the meat-loving marine creatures will be safe.

We The Bay now!

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>>136429113

>>136429514
>>136429561
pls no

t. Flintite

>>136429113

It's literally just fucking sea lice. They have anti-colagulating compounds in their bite to help bleed you out better so they can suck on your blood.

It's literally no different than getting bed bugs.

Stop making Australia look weird when we are safer and more normal than any European or North American country.

>>136429113
now you have a place to put your muslims

Ok, so only his legs were affected because he decided to only soak his legs. It must be a new organism.

>>136429775

>t. SLIDF

>>136429775
>safer and more normal than any European or North American country.

YOU FUCKING WOT MATE

>>136429775
says the sea lice

nice try

>>136429775
>types increasingly nervous sea louse for the millionth time

>>136429661

Just sea lice. More of them than usual and closer to shore because of chinks overfishing.

The Africans at Brighton Beach are a bigger concern.

>>136429113
>Be in straya
>get eaten

the life

>>136429113
>Sea lice feast on fresh meat
If he was black it would say "Young boy brutalized by racist parasites of the deep"

>>136429514
Why bother? Any pavement apes that venture into the water die anyway

>>136429113
Fukushima disaster. It created mutant predator algae. More reason to advance genetic-engineering.

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>>136429775
>sea lice
What in the sweet, living fuck..?

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bay_(film)

>>136429775
>It's literally no different than getting bed bugs.
I can just get a new mattress. You can't get a new ocean dumb petrol huffer.

>sea lice
do you neets ever leave your house? the other day i saw a thread about fucking chigger bites, and some of you were stunned this sort of thing can happen. go outside jesus christ

>>136429775
>No different than getting bed bugs
>Can easily exterminate bed bugs
>Go into water
>Eaten alive by S E A L I C E

Shit hole country.

If only there was a way to weaponize this

>>136429775
t. sea lice

>>136429775
nice try sea lice merchant

>>136429846
I'd prefer dangerous wildlife over niggers and towelheads any day (albeit we currently have both)

>>136429775
I aint going for a swim in Brighton sea baths you fucking Sea Louse, you can't fool me.

>>136429839
>SLIDF
i agree
(((Big Lice))) wants us to think this is normal

>>136429775
>sea lice
>more normal than any European or North American country
That's where you're wrong Bruce

>>136429113

it's not even that bad I mean he didn't even need to go to the drs.

Sea lice don't even bite the hard and we don't drink much blood.

>>136429775
Bro, Australia is fucked. It's not made for humans.

>>136429966
Welcome to straya cunt!

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>>136429775

>>136429886
>>136429775
>sea lice
dont act like this is normal

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>>136429113

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There are tiny, microscopic jellyfish in Australia that can literally kill you and you can't even see them with the naked eye. If there is a God, apparently he wanted no one to ever live on that island

>Not infesting the Mediterranean with this so the "refugees" get eaten alive.

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>>136429113
australia is not a white mans country sucks you sun baked bongs will never swim in an ontario lake . Why do you guys even bother anymore .

>>136429978

Why would you need a new mattress you big poof.

Your skin will callous.

Big fucking sooks.

And that's why the Brits exiled all their trash to Australia. It'a a death trap.

>>136429989
>haha go outside where all this retarded shit you don't even know about can bite you
fuck off louse.

>>136429973
>>136429964
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Host_(2006_film)

>>136429153
27s

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>>136430253
have you heard about stonefish?

>>136430066

>Swimming in Brighton, Sydney or Melbourne variants

Strictly ethnic behavior.

>foreigners freaking out over this
If this place really is so deadly then how are we fucking swamped with hipsters and asian investors?

>>136429113

In Australia even the waters feed from your flesh. When you place the foot on a boot you get stinged by 5 black widows, 4 scorpions, 6 vipers and god knows what nightmares still lie inside.

There was even a report of a woman who tried to kill a toad with a stick. The toad squished some poison to her eyes an she went blind. There are orcs afoot called abbos and I bet even the fucking trees give you chase to maul the shit out of you.

The desert sucks.

>>136430122

It's perfectly fine.

There are BEARS in the U.S.

At least what kills you here doesn't eat you FIRST.

Unless it's a shark or croc.

>>136430379
Impressive. He's getting quicker.

>>136429113
Surfed for most of my life, and i have never seen sea lice do something this severe. Must have been a big swarm, this is extremely unusual.

>>136429775
I imagined a flustered anime girl writing this.

>>136430506
Bears don't even give a fuck about people if you don't get near their cubs. Otherwise they'll only attack if they're hungry as fuck out in the middle of the woods and you act like a beta around them.

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>>136430423
>I bet even the fucking trees give you chase to maul the shit out of you.


“Being stung is the worst kind of pain you can imagine - like being burnt with hot acid and electrocuted at the same time,” said Marina, who at the time was a postgraduate student at James Cook University investigating the herbivores that eat stinging trees.

“The allergic reaction developed over time, causing extreme itching and huge hives that eventually required steroid treatment. At that point my doctor advised that I should have no further contact with the plant and I didn’t object.”
North Queensland road surveyor A.C. Macmillan was among the first to document the effects of a stinging tree, reporting to his boss in 1866 that his packhorse “was stung, got mad, and died within two hours”. Similar tales abound in local folklore of horses jumping in agony off cliffs and forestry workers drinking themselves silly to dull the intractable pain.

Writing to Marina in 1994, Australian ex-serviceman Cyril Bromley described falling into a stinging tree during military training on the tableland in World War II. Strapped to a hospital bed for three weeks and administered all manner of unsuccessful treatments, he was sent “as mad as a cut snake” by the pain. Cyril also told of an officer shooting himself after using a stinging-tree leaf for “toilet purposes”.

http://www.australiangeographic.com.au/topics/science-environment/2009/06/gympie-gympie-once-stung,-never-forgotten/

>>136429561
Not even sure if referring to the sea lice or the nigs

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>>136430423

>Getting squirted by a Cane Toad


Served the murderous bitch right.

Caneys are our friends. Caneys are our allies and keep (((them))) away.

>>136429775
>>136429113
This is why people are insane to live in Australia.

The most dangerous wildlife on Earth.

sea, land, and air; no escape from danger.

The sea has sharks, jellyfish, and parasites.

Land has Cassowaries, Spiders, etc

Air has Tornado made of wind and fire, etc and Birds that purposely try to peck your eyes out and frequently target bikers and motorcyclists and its illegal to shoot those dangerous birds due to Australian law even though this harmful, dangerous behavior is a genetic trait and if Australia just let their citizens cull those birds then, eventually only the peaceful birds that didn't receive that aggressive genetic trait would be the only ones remaining.

>>136429775
>litterally RABID SEA LICE eating peoples legs off
>Dont worry m80 its the safest place yuh can be

Only in australia

I love /an/ threads on /pol/

>>136429113
NNNNOOOOOOOPPPEEEEE
fuck your cursed devil island!

>>136430768
>No mention of drop bears

Drop bears. Not even once.

>>136430380
Doesn't necessarily kill you. Just makes you wish you'd never been born.

>>136430611
Good call. The appeal to the country being "more normal" than others suggests a conformist feminine mind.

>>136430612
T. Bear

>>136430271
this why white men are weak, all they have ever known was good weather and cold. Nothing ever challenged them besides disease free forests and fauna and other europeans who abide by some gentlemen's concept of war. Theyre totally unprepared for genocidal warfare and the harsh realities of the south. In The global south is kill or be killed, there is a pitfall at every turn whether it be disease from parasitic infection or a tribe of ruthless fertile and cannabalistic barbarians. The modern whiteman is a pussified archetype. he cannot dream of the pain of conquest and destrution that the global routinely inflicts on itself and on others; he is too comfortable and pussified. He does not belong in the south, he is a gentle creature. too stupid and placid for warfare and conquest.

>Be Aussie
>Wake up to odd feeling on head
>It's one of those dang JarleyWoops burrowing through your skull
>Go to bathroom
>Almost forget to knife the morning's demon crab build up from the sink
>phew
>grab parasite extractor
>remove JarleyWoops from cerebral cortex
>Pesky things
>return to bed
>Abbo bangs on your window
>"gimmie a fag, cunt!"
>Luckily a chazbarian hawk swoops him up and eviscerates him on your lawn
>realize a pesky lot of razor dingos will be on your lawn eating the scraps all day

Such is life as an Aussie

>>136429775
Somebodies gotta make a sealice poster memepic now pls

>>136430768
>air

Thunderstorm asthma: Ninth death in Victoria after freak weather event in 2016

A ninth person has died of thunderstorm asthma after a freak weather event late last year.

About 8,500 people sought hospital treatment when the weather changed abruptly on November 21, as a cool change and thunderstorms swept across Melbourne.

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2017-01-25/thunderstorm-asthma-ninth-death-in-victoria/8212096

>>136429775
sea lice are not allowed to post on this board reported you nasty critter get ye gone

>>136430116
>Sea lice don't even bite the hard and we don't drink much blood.
>we
O fuck they absorb the abilities of their victims. Now sealice are gonna shitpost on /pol/

>>136430771
dont forget the rape hungry abos and the fucking aids infested niggers raping on a whim. no guns, no weapons. i fucking hope australia is the testing grounds for best koreas fledgling nuclear arsenal

>>136430882
t. dead hiker cuck

>>136430350
ive never encountered sea lice, nigger, but im not shocked by their existence. if youre seriously trying to argue that 90% of this board doesnt need to go hike or see some nature, youre the fucking louse

>>136430402
Our concern is for the hosts, not the parasites.

>>136429989
>>136430350
1950s to late 1960s was the only time in America where everybody could run outside naked no matter the environment like the forest and not have to worry about ticks or mosquitoes because that era was the height of our aggressive DDT campaign where we carpet bombed everything with DDT.

We were pretty close to making a shitload of pests extinct in America, desu.

Also, our global DDT campaign at one point allowed for only 20 malaria cases in India in a single year.

We should have never stopped our DDT campaign.

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>>136429839

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>>136429775
t. lice

>>136430906
well mate victorians aren't a very strong bunch

>>136429113

>Be in Australia
>Wake up in morning for work
>Huge deadly spider in shower so have to skip it
>Getting dressed, mandatory check on shows before putting them on
>Another deadly spider in shoe
>will have to go bear foot
>Walk to car
>Crocodile asleep on bonnet of car
>have to walk bare foot to work
>Get mugged by Abo's
>Call police who smell you and look at you an figure you're a vagrant
>get a lift out of town
>Fucking snake chokes you
>people near by can't help you because it's endangered
>break free
>finally arrive at work
>Get fired for being late
>Get back home
>fucking deadly spiders drank your last can of Fosters
>decide to bathe while spiders are drinking
>get in bath
>fucking tiny meat loving marine creatures eat you in the bath


Why the fuck would anyone want to live in aus. The fuck is wrong with you people?

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>>136430768

Magpies are cunts obsessively attracted to shiny things and doing your head in.

Literally no different from your average woman.

>>136430768
WOOT!!!
AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE!!!

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>>136429775
pic related

>>136429113
Aussiefags trying to one-up Florida again, I see.

http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/strange/

>>136431033
We breed them tough

Only way I see this happening is if this guy was a paraplegic. When sea lice bite you its itchy and noticeable.

>>136431034
>magpies nest in a tree out the back and old mate up there starts getting a bit pissed
>half of your back yard is off limits for the next few months

>>136430989
I've hiked before and it fucking sucked you go out on Mount Bugbite and get bit by a bunch of little niggers just to see some faggot trees that get cut down a year later so white people can live there away from the blacks wow cool.

>>136431148
Feed them, seriously befriend the mapies and they do not swoop you.

>>136430946
>Australia get some nuked by NKorea
>We unleash emus and attack kangaroos on their asses
>Big Brother USA assists us in raping them
China probably wouldn't be too happy with them either due to their economic ties with us.

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Cunts fucked, mate!

>>136431248
cunt we couldn't even walk out near the fucking tree, what was i supposed to do, throw food at them?

>>136430906

9 people died from a cold front moving in?

Fuck, we have had days where it went from 0F to 70F then back to 0F in 48 hours... maybe Australia aint so bad, its just full of pussies.

>>136430379
>>136430547
According to my calculations, in 17 posts he will be posting at the exact same moment as OP.
Any further than that and OP's post will appear as a reply to his archived link.

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>>136431033

Nice scenery.

Not like I had a choice. Your great great great grandfather sent my great great great grandfather to God's Own Lawn for a little bit of naughty surprise sex and attempting to liberate Ireland from the Eternal Beady.

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>>136431289
>>136431285
>>136431262
>>136431248
>>136431148
>>136431122
>>136431036
>>136431034
>>136431027
>>136431009
>>136430906
>>136430840
>>136430681
>>136430581
>>136430547
>>136430506
>>136430402
>>136430388
>>136430380
>>136430303
>>136430081
>>136430066
>>136430064
>>136429886
>>136429775
>>136429334
>>136429113
so many aussie cunts

>aussies trying to make sea lice seem normal
This just confirms that they're used to this kind of shit

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>>136430681
>Cyril also told of an officer shooting himself after using a stinging-tree leaf for “toilet purposes”
Burn them all, jesus christ

>>136429775
>Be Australian
>Wake up to alarm clock
>There's a redback spider on my phone
>Brush it off and pray it leaves me alone because it's illegal to kill such precious wildlife
>Grab car keys and narrowly dodge resident venomous snake
>Dodge falling eucalyptus branches on the way to my car, get in
>FUCK
>Abbos huffed all my petrol
>Oh well, it's their land, cunt
>Decide to take day off
>Walk to beach
>Put on my government approved jogging helmet and powerwalk to the water
>Legs get mangled by sea lice
>Realize my country was a mistake
>Want to kill myself
>Drive 100 miles to the nearest gun store
>Try to buy a government approved single shot .22 FOR SPORTING PURPOSES ONLY!
>Have to wait 6 months and pay 6 gorillion dollars
>MFW there goes my Vegemite and Fosters budget

>>136431289
Get raw snags, open door and feed from door.
My family had to do it, those bastards become big and strong but did not swoop anyone who entered our house.

>>136431081
Wew lad
That right there is real freedom, right aus bros?

>>136430940
been here for years mate

>>136431450
anyone have the my sides going into orbit gif?

>>136431450
brilliant

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>>136429775

>>136430380

There is no way you would be able to see a fish like this in 4 foot of water. The waves alone distort the view at the bottom of the ocean.

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>>136431419
This is Aussie chan, cunt.

>>136430989
If God intended humans to go see nature, he wouldn't have made us naked.

He should have made our skin acquire metallic qualities on demand, desu.

>>136431478

It's a shoop.

But it's not far from the truth (they can fine you for not wearing a stack hat when riding a fucking push bike now)

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>>136431419

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>>136430894
i lol'd

>>136431081

Yikes this nanny state bs is going over board

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>>136431450
well done

>>136429113
>can't explain how sea lice did this

Anyone remember the bacteria that BP released into the ocean to clean up the thousands of litres of oil they spilt? Remember how it started to eat the flesh of animals exposed to it?

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>>136431450
>There's a redback spider on my phone
i remember when i was at a mate's house and we were sleeping in her bed, and i woke up to something brushing my face. i thought that she was trying to wake me up, but it was actually one of these. the cunt was the size of my palm

the screaming, mate. i can still hear it. i about put that poor girl through a wall.

>>136431456
well, i'll try that next time the royal magpie militia comes for me.

“What is really clear is these little things really love meat,” he said of a video showing the bugs in a tray of water devouring chunks of meat. "

Where's the video

>>136429113
It's called seabather's eruption caused by sea lice/plankton, it's not that bad the picture just makes it look worse.
There are sea lice/plankton where there are beaches, it's not that uncommon.

>>136431650
Kek

>>136431419
Got nothing better to do at uni m8.


Now a good question is could we weaponise these sealice (or whatever the hell they are) and dump them in the drinking water of our good old friend Indonesia?

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>>136431755
this picture is more accurate.

>>136430380
my dad stepped on one when we were wade fishing, he drove to the grocery store where he worked grabbed some baking soda to neutralize or pull out the toxin not sure and spent 4 hours in the bathroom cursing the damn fish

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>>136431430
They probably fight off emus on their way to work. I can't imagine the stuff they put up with.

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>>136431692

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Reminder: Spiders is a weather condition in Aussie land

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>>136431755

>>136429113
Frig off we're full pretty soon will be come get your legs eaten

>>136431834
Why didn't your dad head to urgent care or the emergency room?

I wouldn't risk trying to deal with poison or venom from wildlife in case I make things worst by panicking.

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>>136431450

>>136431769
Go to the link in OP and watch the 48 second video on the top of the page. They don't look like sea lice to me, but I'm no where near an expert.

>>136431650
Nice.

>>136431773
>shilling this hard
sl/pidf pls go

>>136431820
>>136431755
The wolf spiders at my house get pretty big but at least they have the courtesy to leave people the fuck alone.

>>136431954
That's why you'd never make it in Australia burger boy

>>136431867

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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>>136429775
fuck it all mate. Little bitch whining about sea lice, how about the great white which ate my leg when surfing in Sydney 5 years ago? Fucking millennials. Pussies all of them.

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>>136431750
...anon, I think you might be on to something here.

>>136431450
>Drive 100 miles to the nearest gun store
This got me

>>136431313
this is causality violation
nord anon is not capable

>>136432001
they're like little pets

>>136431867
I'd do what that Russian officer did before he was captured by isis and just call ordnance on my head

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>>136429775
So basically you have swarms of tiny leeches floating around your coasts? Australia really is God's warning against Man not to cross him.

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>>136431867

>>136430833
Seriously. Fucking drop bears kill like 10 tourists every week dude it's ridiculous

>>136431993
You got me, we're invading very soon. Your women will give birth to human-plankton hybrids.

>>136432110
On one hand I'm tempted to call you a cunt, but on the other hand I do love me some Total War.

>>136432224
at least it's not windy

>>136429153
This guy

>>136431867
Its summer and spiders are crawling out of nowhere and I been having to vaccum clean them at least every one of two days. Don't know how they grow big when there is nothing to eat in the house.

However, one night in a dimmed room, while I was watching the computer screen, I noticed this black fuzz seemingly floating in front of me. It was blurry though and I thought an eyelash got into my pupil so I headed to the sink and tried to wash it out and it seemed to work so I headed back to my room.

Then 5 minutes later, I noticed the black fuzz in my eyesight again and I became very concerned then.

I didn't think I was hallucinating a ghost or anything like that so I went back to the bathroom and took a good close look in the mirror and to my horror a spider was dangling on my on my forehead by attaching web to some of my hair and dangling down to the level of my eyeball and my immediate reaction was to jump into the shower and turn the water on and just fuck everything.

My clothes were wet, my shirt was wet, and I kept the shower on, at my face, until I noticed a big black struggling spider being washed away.

What a horrible day that was.

I can't believe this spider was able to sneak up on me and crawled up on my head without me noticing.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drop_bear

>>136429113
Fucking NOPE
Australia is a death sentence.

>>136430271
i usually shit on canada but when it comes to swimming? australia is fucking dangerous

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>>136432127
Yeah lice seems like bullshit to me if one bites it hurts like hell no way they could eat your feet without knowing

Let me see if I can find that original BP oil leak story

>>136429113
Fake story. Do you know how fucking cold it was in Melbourne on the weekend!!! There is no way this faggot had the balls to go into the water.

>>136429775

Fuck you, Sea Lice.

>>136431842

Lived here nearly my whole life and only ever been stung by bees, ants and scorpions.

Almost a puffer fish but only because someone threw it at me.

The U.S. has snakes, bears and all sorts of deadly wildlife.

Come to Australia. It's paradise.

Stay away from the highways around national parks though.

>>136429153
YOU ARE A LEGEND BRO
GREAT SERVICE

>>136430271
that's canada for like 2 months a year

the other 10 months are shit be honest

>>136430681
I remember brushing up against one of those while hiking up a creek. My leg was on fucking fire for about half an hour and dipping my leg in the cold as fuck water did nothing.

>>136429886
The African's are at Brighton beach these days???

>>136432254
What is a drop bear?

>>136432441
>Only ever been stung by bees, ants and scorpions.
>Scorpions

Australia isn't dange

>>136432537
We have scorpions here tho

>>136432537
Used to find em under my swag all the time. Had snakes fall out of the rafters onto the dinner table once too...

>>136429839
Goddam sea lice shill GTFO!!!

>>136429775
Fuck, they're intelligent too.

>>136432531
fake news

>>136429775

sea lices should stop shitposting

>>136431820
Chased a baby camel spider about that size once

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Right you cunts, yer all fucken' weak as piss. There aint a damn thing wrong with our wildlife and it sure as shit aint as dangerous as you make it out to be. Seriously, we aint 'fraid o' none of them "dangerous" cunts, we fucken' kill em with our bare hands. Spiders the size of cars? pshh, aint no big, just rip their legs off and fry 'em up fer brekky. Snakes the size of freight trains? just knife 'em. Crocodiles? wrestle the fuckers and cook 'em up fer lunch. Drop Bears? Just climb up the harness holding us to the bottom of the world and fucken punch the cunts out. Bogans? fucken run 'em over. Abos? cunt, give 'em one beer and they'll die of alcohol poisoning. Sea lice? SEA LICE? The fuck are you going swimming for? just remain in the harness keeping you from falling off the planet.

But seriously, yer all fucken dopey cunts, aint nothin' scary 'bout our fucken wildlife.

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>>136432220

Don't stand still like an idiot and it's not a problem.

Don't move too quickly though or you'll get the sharks worked up.

Send more nets pls.

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>>136432335
>tfw gale-force spiders

>>136430997
>not living between the Rockies and Sierras
Ticks are basically nonexistent and the local government dusts for mosquitoes. No parasitic worms in the ground or leeches in the water either.

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One of these cunts ate my dog last week.

>>136432441
>the us has snakes
Your island is filled with the shits. What's hanging around the highways around national parks? High as fuck abbos looking to bum a ride?

>>136432368
They're nasty cunts, although the wolf spiders that we have in my house from time to time in Melbourne are alright, except the one time one bit my dad.

Although that bite led to him having to go to te doctor where they were able to discover early signs of leukaemia in my dad, so I guess that spider was alright as well.

>>136432693
I heard Aussie have a new defense program for weaponizing drop bears.

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>>136432537

They're small here. Bit more painful than a Wasp sting.

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>>136431750

>>136432693
Omg dropbear!

>>136432398
I was always curious why Japan never attempted to invade Australia during WW2.

The cost to make Australia safe and livable for Japanese would have been astronomical.

Only Godzilla could sterilize the continent to make it safe for humans to live in.

>>136429113
Hahahaha they even have human meat loving chinks in castratelia

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>>136432707

No. People looking to GIVE you a ride...

>>136432693
Yeah they are literally everywhere and even come into the cities at night. I saw one in Sydney last month. Didnt they kill and eat some burger tourist a while back? I heard he strayed too far from tourist areas.

>>136432825
They already infected with chlamydia.

>>136432972
Uncle Ivan had the best camping tips
>always take a shovel
> duct tape. Very very very handy

>>136430906
Jesus Christ, in Canada this is called "the good season". Wew lads.

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>>136432441
snakes are purty though
and I've never been bit by any.

>>136433015
That was me. My bad

>>136432537
Most scorpions aren't deadly. But America has one of the most toxic species;https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arizona_bark_scorpion

>>136430253

Oh yeah, I forgot about those little fuckers.

>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Irukandji_syndrome
>Because the jellyfish is very small, and the venom is only injected through the tips of the nematocysts, the sting may barely be noticed at first. It has been described as feeling like little more than a mosquito bite. The symptoms, however, gradually become apparent and then more and more intense in the subsequent five to 120 minutes (30 minutes on average). Irukandji syndrome includes an array of systemic symptoms, including severe headache, backache, muscle pains, chest and abdominal pain, nausea and vomiting, sweating, anxiety, hypertension, tachycardia and pulmonary edema.

>One unusual symptom associated with the syndrome is a feeling of "impending doom". Patients have been reported as being so certain they are going to die, they beg their doctors to kill them to get it over with.

I think it's pretty obvious at this point that God doesn't want humans living on this death island.

>>136433095
cute little bugger

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>>136429113

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>>136429113
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>136431650

Not bad, faggot

>>136429775
>no different than getting bed bugs.
Show me a bed bug infection picture as gruesome as OP's sea lice wounds.

>>136433192
Underrated

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>>136432441
>to Australia. It's paradise.
Shut the fuck up you little cunt. What part of Fuck off we are full you dont understand? Faggot.

There's literally no reason to worry about sea lice at all. They're so tiny they could never hurt you, and really they generally won't anyway. There's tons of other shit in the ocean that sea lice love to eat, this was a once-off. The little bit of blood on him is misleading too. It looks like a lot, but really it's nothing. It's not like sea lice are capable of literally eating your leg. They just nip you to say hi.

>>136430681
>Contact with the leaves or twigs causes the hollow, silica-tipped hairs to penetrate the skin. The hairs cause an extremely painful stinging sensation that can last anywhere from days to YEARS, and the injured area becomes covered with small, red spots joining together to form a red, swollen welt. The sting is infamously agonizing. Ernie Rider, who was slapped in the face and torso with the foliage in 1963, said "For two or three days the pain was almost unbearable; I couldn’t work or sleep, then it was pretty bad pain for another fortnight or so. The stinging persisted for two years and recurred every time I had a cold shower. There's nothing to rival it; it's ten times worse than anything else."

>>136433248
You can't exactly get rid of sea life from the ocean, either.

>>136433192
Top tier taste mi amigo

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>>136432825
Remember boys and girls.
>Big claws, thin tail = not deadly
>Small claws, thick tail = deadly

>>136431450
>Put on my government approved jogging helmet and powerwalk to the water
This isn't actually a thing, is it?

>>136429153
You are my hero, I aspire to be just like you in my life Norway bro

No wonder why they sent the worst scum of UK on this island.

>>136433165
>One unusual symptom associated with the syndrome is a feeling of "impending doom". Patients have been reported as being so certain they are going to die, they beg their doctors to kill them to get it over with.

a lot of villans attempt to do this, but fail.

>>136433353
Tell that to BP
*gets hired as Daily Show writer*

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>>136431650
Berfegd :DD

>>136433272
You guys should advertise your dangerous wildlife. That way it would stop illegal immigration although it might hurt tourism.

That is why so few Japanese choose to move to Australia.

>>136433429
The small brown ones the size of a dime are the ones you have to look out for in Tx

>>136431081
Is this real? It can't be...

>>136432825
Meant fto reply to
>>136432843

>>136433429
some scorpions have both, makes things tricky

>>136432497
Only for pussy ass faggots like you

>>136432658
You tell yourself that leaf...

>>136429153
mods ban this fucker he is breaking the law

>>136433684
t. guardianbot

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>>136429113
You all should run ads in SE Asia about all the fun wildlife you got to keep the boaters down.

Aussie aussie aussie OI OI OI

https://youtu.be/LfuFwTK4Q5E

>>136429113
Why the fuck do you guys even go to the beach? I can barely bring myself to go in the water and I live in a California beach town. Humans weren't meant for this shit. Take a boat.

>>136433095
ive kept cottonmouths, and ausy snakes, just love snakes as my name suggests

>>136432693

hahahahaha wtf
Can we send you some ARs? We have plenty and it looks like you need some.
#ARsforAUS

>>136430946
Yep all we need are the natives to become radioactive mutants. That will surely improve things

>>136433522
>>136433746
Hell they could exaggerate or even make up shit too, just to scare 'em off. They're superstitious, they'll buy it. Incidentally I lost a friend to a dropbear attack three years ago. Be aware, anons.

There sea lice in Florida. Look it up.

>>136429775
t. man eating spider

>>136429775
he said, hiding next to his collection of six gorillion antivenoms

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>>136429113
>swimming in anything but a pool

>>136433582
Do you have an example?

>>136433861
nice

>>136430388
find dirtiest city 'beaches' to swim in. genius

>>136429775
yay

>>136429113
Weird that Australia is this unnatural hellhole where everything wants you dead in the worst way possible, and we're just a skip and a hop away and have literally nothing. Just fluffy flightless birds.

>>136433914
Those are harmless as long as you stay away from trees...Hoop snakes, on the other hand...

>>136432441
I live in America, ive been stung by a bee once. No snek no ber

>>136434125
You used to have giant people eating eagles and giant moas before the maori hunted them all away

>>136431081
Is this real?

>>136433346
>YEARS
My ambition to visit Australia to rock climb just turned into NOPE.JPG

>tfw if Australia wasnt a bunch of non freedom loving cucks on gun laws Id live there in a heartbeat
Even if the crocs are meaner then the gators here and they got more venomous snakes to worry about I'm cool with everything else

>>136434125
Your whole region of the world is fantasy-tier, it's just that one's the shire and the other is Mad Max plus monsters

>>136430946
>i fucking hope australia is the testing grounds for best koreas fledgling nuclear arsenal
The brits already did.

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Sea lice? M8's I guess you lads have never heard of the emus.... I'm a vet of the great emu war and fuck m8, I still get flashbacks of the time my comrade went to deck one of the bloody buggas and then it bit him in the jugular
RIP Bazza, I fucking miss you cunt :(

>>136430894
Milwaukee could use some chazbarian hawks

>>136429775
fucking lice shills GTFO

>>136434294
We don't want you here anyways

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>>136433478

M8 it wasn't just criminals.

They also sent disgraced or corrupt military personnel to oversee them.

>>136434354
Ostrich eggs are yummy :)

It's like a WH40k death world

>>136429886
If only nigs weren't afraid of water. One problem would solve another.

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>>136431033
>drinking Fosters

>>136432441
>Throwing a puffer fish at friends just for the bantz.

Kekd so hard. I love you Aussies.>>136432001

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>>136433480

I feel like this has commercial potential.

>>136429153
I hope you get paid. Holy shit my dude, keep up the work.

>>136434294
>I'm cool with everything else

Having lived in the US for comparison, you don't really know what you're talking about. Shit you don't hear about because everybody's used to dealing with it and there's nothing special about it at all. By the time I was 7 or 8 I'd learned how to handle snakes, which spiders were dangerous, which ants were dangerous, the fucking birds that will swoop down and crack your skull if you walk in the wrong spot.

There is death at basically every turn here if you don't do what we do.

GYO SOON FELLOW MANKIND

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iZugt3fiBe0

I TOLD YOU AND YOU CALLED ME CRAZY

IT'S COMING

YOU HUMANS HAVE NO CHANCE OF SURVIVAL

>>136431456
We just used mince. You would walk outside and hold your arm up with a tiny bit of mince. They would come soaring down from the other end of the street and just chill out with us even got them to perch on our shoulders and stuff.

>>136431081
cops do not enforce this.

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>Go to Australia
>Get eaten

>>136433746

It's easier to just keep sending them our murderous pedophiles to attack the problem at it's root.

>>136429113
fuck I hope they don't spread

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>>136433429
>>136433582
>>136434016

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>>136429153
Norwegian Archive bot strikes again

>>136430028
>Can easily exterminate bed bugs

lol

>>136431673
Kek

>>136432920
Japan did go for Australia. They were fought off in Papua New Guinea.

>>136433934
Yeah but here they don't gnaw your fucking legs off

>>136433887

Sure. As long as you also send a flotilla of lawyers and accountants to handle the registration and storage paperwork.

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>>136429153
skynet?

>>136433684
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA U MAD BRO THOSE SHITTY WEBSITES NEVER GET A SINGLE CENT IN ADBUX FROM ME!!!

>>136429153
you are truly a god among men.

>>136431692
Kek

>>136432441
>The U.S. has snakes, bears and all sorts of deadly wildlife.
US bears only attack stupid people.
US snakes are either docile (rattlers) or not deadly (cottonmouths)
The only deadly wildlife you have to watch out for are niggers

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>>136429775

>>136431650
Enjoy your (you)

>>136429775
Fuck off mate i've been fucking wrecked by sea lice and it caused me to have over 1000 lumps that looked like mosquito bites all over my body, not fucking bleed out.

>>136434737
someone just wrote a very, very, very, very, very good bot.

>>136432692
Senpai hai desert desu

>>136434125

Maoris literally eat white people, and they're smarter than the average shark.

>>136429775
except, bed bugs CANT FUCKIN SWIM, you cannibalist apologist cunt. These TINY INVISIBLE KILLER BASTARDS are IN THE WATER, waiting. Just wait till they infiltrate your drink water supplies. JUST.

>>136434547
Im from the south and learned how to wrestle gators and deal with snakes and love both of them. And anybody who isnt a yankee fuck should know which wildlife they live around are dangerous and which are not. The only difference is you have more species of venomous snakes than I do but that doesnt matter because Ill pick thefuckers up regardless

>>136430681
>>136434257

Ive been stung by one of them on a hunting trip: it is pretty bad but not as bad as you think because the tree is very big so you literally have to climb the tree to come into contact with the leaves. When I got stung it was from me walking into a 2meter sapling growing on a river bed - it takes ages for the pain to go away but it is just bee sting tier pain, not life threatening and it only effects the area where you are not wearing clothes.

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made pic for the thread

>>136432920
Mothra deth rey

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>>136434257

It's no different from a platypus sting.

You'll get used to it and vicks works wonders.

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>>136432441
>Almost a puffer fish but only because someone threw it at me.
what in God's name is wrong with you people?

>>136434721
>As long as you also send a flotilla of lawyers and accountants
If you want to sink a ship full of jews just ask

>>136434928
shoo shoo GGIDF

>>136434923
>And anybody who isnt a yankee fuck should know which wildlife they live around are dangerous and which are not.

ALL OF IT.

Snakes are really just the tip of the iceberg. Fucking seagulls will murder your face off here m8

>>136430686
the sea lice of course

who the fuck wants to eat niggers

>>136434663
/v/ vs /pol/ vs /trv/ vs /an/

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>>136435048
Does my little aussie cunt here look deadly to you?

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>>136429113
>vicious man-eating beasts
>even the fish
>'straya
>surprise level: 0

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>>136429153
>>136429153
>Why didn't you archive?
Because the stupid fucking retarded archive doesn't include pictures. In this case, the story is about the pictures.
Please learn not to be retarded, Norbot.

>>136431450
lmao

>>136431034

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YGGTcYfrEZU
Such a dramatic video lol

>>136429775
>>>/an/2449969

>>136432531
https://australianmuseum.net.au/drop-bear

>>136435019
They live in a fever-dream of a continent populated by monsters and monstrous flora.

>>136431033
everything right except drinking fosters

>>136435302
Dont link best board here it always invites shitters

>>136434914

>Drinking tap water

For what purpose?

>>136430612
bidf pls go

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>>136431867
>living in a place where a flamethrower is required to step out of the house

>>136435048
>Fucking seagulls will murder your face off here m8
http://www.baka.com.au/video/video-news/video-national-news/what-is-the-seagull-prank-20160204-4a0nf.html