How the fuck is that even possible ?

rigor mortis

It's the difference between the virgin corpse vs the Chad deceased.

>>136184694
kek

>>136184522
Rigor Mortis ? Even the corpse's cock is hard during that stage ? And so , she'd have to hurry and do this before 72h or something right ?
But how about the ejaculation bit ?

>>136184405
well i guess you'll have to kill a guy and jack him off to see

>>136184405
I am so torn, I want to ask how but I am sure as fuck I don't want to know.

White "people" everyone

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Posthumous_sperm_retrieval

Apparently sperm can live anywhere from 24-36 hours after a person has died.

>>136184405
>>136184694
Now that I think about it, the best part about this thing is that that nasty bitch didn't even use a fucking condom when she was fucking dead bodies

>>136184405
FAKE NEWS

http://www.snopes.com/politics/satire/stiffed.asp

>>136184405
she looks half dead herself so i dont see the problem

>>136184405
Easy.
All you need to do is use some skanks mugshot and write an outrageous fake story.

>>136184405
This shit is why necromancy is always illegal. All I want are some skeleton butlers but necrofags like her keep setting our movement back every time we make progress.

Why is this a fellony again? It's not like she hurt anyone.

>>136184405
Take your fake news and fuck off to /x/

>>136184405

Thats called a dead seed child.

it's from a satire news site originally you pleb

>>136184405
stop posting shitty "satire" articles

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>white woman

they are a lost cause, time to take the yellow pill

>>136184405
Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice.

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>>136184977

>>136184405

holy shit that's hot

>>136184977

You win this time nigger. This one is pretty bad.

>>136184405

so is the baby a vampire or something?

also

i doubt its real, as no woman would want a man they couldn't sue for child support

>>136184405
wtf I love Mr Bones wild ride now

>>136184405
And the anit christ is born

>>136185044
You're right....
http://www.business2community.com/us-news/female-mortuary-worker-arrested-becoming-pregnant-corpse-fake-news-01807585#KtW4dGzz52bItuY2.97

>>136185192
no it isn't you fucking LEAF

arghhhh burn your country

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>>136184405

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>>136184405

Even corpses get more pussy than /pol/ autists.

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>>136184977

>>136184694
lol I love you guys

>>136185044
>Linking to Snopes
Get out.

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>>136184694

>>136184994
But how is he supposed to ejaculate when he's braindead?

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If the hearse is rockin', don't bother knockin'

>the dead can get laid and you can't

>>136185655
At least that fine young kang removed that albino niglet from the gene pool

>>136185737
As if a traditional stiffy doesn't make one braindead.

>>136184405

THIS STORY IS FAKE.

I LOOKED IT UP AND IT IS SATIRE.

GET SMARTER POL

>>136184886
>I am so torn, I want to ask how but I am sure as fuck I don't want to know.
"THAT'S MY INTERNET!™"

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>>136184405
>YFW men have no time limit and can make Aryan babies 40yrs from now

>>136184405
>The corpse can't have a hard-on or ejaculate.

I know for a fact at the very least dead men have erect penises

>>136184405
I bet you are an American that doesn't know anything about sex education. Are you from the South of America?
I am an Arab in the Middle East and I know better.

What a dumb cunt.

>>136184405
Lel, literally impossible. All she has to do to win the case is to say they met while they were alive and show how stupid the prosecutors theory is

>>136185790
my thoughts

>>136184405

If I ever ate shit for good and left no one behind, then somebody like Jennifer Burrows would literally be the last line of defense between my legacy and oblivion.

She is a hero in my book!

(Unless, of course, she was a necrophiliac coal burner...)

>>136185152
>fish eyes

>>136184405
WORLD NEWS DAILY REPORT IS SATIRE

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>>136185152
Ah yes, Asians. Truly the pinnacle of all that is human.

Beauty.
Creativity.
Compassion.

They score an 11 out of 10 in every field, unlike scandinavian whites who are renowned for being low-test, risk averse uggos who butcher their livestock alive and ignore people dying in the streets.

It's from worldnewsdailyreport, a fake story site.

http://worldnewsdailyreport.com/morgue-worker-arrested-after-giving-birth-to-a-dead-mans-baby/

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>>136185577
There's some really fucked up shit out there for sure..

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>>136184694
We need a drawfag over here

>>136184405
bet they still make the poor cunt pay child support

>>136184405
Kansas was a mistake

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>>136184694
kek

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>>136184405
>Women will have sex with dead men instead of living men to keep the pussy valuable on the market
Hurry up Japan, the world's burning and only you can put the fire out.

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MFW dead guys get more sex than I do....

>>136184405
BIG
ZOMBIE
COCK

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>>136184694
God fucking damn it man

>>136185737
massage the prostate and wait for ejaculation

>>136184694

Haha I wish I had the time to make this one

>>136186984

>Kansas City, Missouri

Boi, can you not read?

>>136184405

Waiting for Feminists suing some dead man's family for child support.

>>136186560
>beauty
>creativity

Not only was she not arrested, she also didn't give birth to a dead man's baby, just to be clear. Fake news website World News Daily reports on the alleged

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>>136184405
How the hell did people even suspect that? How did they even come to that anyway?

>>136185737
ask a progressive

>>136184405
Actually depending on the type of death a corpse can have an erection for the period between 3 and 6 hours after death. I guess that part of the CNS was still working for his prostate to work, but hey wierder things have happened.

There's literally no possible way for this to be true kek

>>136184405
Niiiiiiice

>>136184405

I wanna know why she's got two black eyes lel

>>136184405
The antichrist has been born.

>>136184694
Second post best post
I laughed so hard
Bless you anon
Bless you

>>136185956

no.

>>136184694
>gets laid in rest

>>136187881
>enough of your CNS is still functional at that point to get your dick hard

That isn't completely unnerving at all.

>>136185107
>it's not like she hurt anyone

She's intentionally bringing a child into this world without a father. The child will also likely inherit her mental illnesses. There is most certainly a victim here.

>>136184977

Quite a while ago some sick bastard posted a vid here in which two dindus in Africa (sub saharans) beheaded a female dindu and used her corpse - one fucked the head, the other the neck-hole.

Yes, this is fucked up, but at least she "just" used the corpse. Compared to Nigger standards (killing someone in a barbaric fashion and fucking bloody stumps) that's almost angelic...

>>136184405
Well, there's a few scenarios where this is possible.

Men do get erections shortly after necrotizing. Would stroking it cause a post mortem ejaculation? I don't know yet. Haven't found anything yet.

The best candidate is electroejaculation. A probe is placed in the rectum and a low powered current is sent through the prostate, causing an ejaculation. This has been proven to work post mortem and produce healthy live sperm.

The third way is a lot more difficult; harvest the sperm directly out of the testicles. This does not produce much, but enough for many rounds of In Vitro.

And yes, a coroner's office does have access to a machine that can produce an electroejaculation. She probably sprem jacked the corpse and inserted his seed with a syringe.

>>136187700
Sarcasm.

Really, asians are very capable of the same intellectual feats as whites, but they never make it to market, or even outside of their studies, because they're all so fucking meek that they dare not take the risks associated with genuine self expression. I suspect this betaness is why they're thought of as heartless towards fellow humans too. They care, but they're too afraid to help and are afraid of any consequences becoming their responsibility.

I guess being so submissive is good for a peaceful and stable society but that's about it.

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>>136185741
Well I broke my nail on your coffin lid
Trying to get to the beauty within
Oh yeah, you're gonna be mine

Digging a grave while wearing a skirt
Asking for trouble, gonna get myself hurt
But its fine, you're gonna be mine

Let me wipe those maggots from your eyes
You make me warm and fuzzy inside
Now my wigs all frizzy
And I've got a run in my hose
Rigor mortis has been kind to you
And left you in a sexy pose

Happily, I'm so happily ever cadaver
You're gonna be mine

This transvestite moves by moonlight
With six inch heels and a pink flashlight
Oh yeah, you're gonna be mine

I put you in the back of my Cadillac
Next to my lingerie and tire jack
Oh yeah, you're gonna be mine

Let me wipe those maggots from your eyes
You make me warm and fuzzy inside
Now my wigs all frizzy
And I've got a run in my hose
Rigor mortis has been kind to you
And left you in a sexy pose

Happily, I'm so happily ever cadaver
You're gonna be mine

All right, dig 'em up
Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi
Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi
Alright

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wURv9AjvqOQ

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>>136184694
spbp

>>136186560
I see what you did there.

Dead bodies lack rights. It's not sexual abuse to fuck them.

>>136184405
And if I think about it, in the middle ages it was believed that demons got impregnated by corpses and created half-demons so that's the reason some of the cultures used to bury their dead.
I'm starting to believe it.

>>136185107
I feel so fucking bad for the kid. How would you go through life knowing your father was dead before you were conceived?
On another thought, she looks like she'd be stupid enough to try to sue the dead father for alimony.

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>>136184694
my sides

>>136184405
Just look at those eyes! You can tell she is seriously mentally ill.

>>136184405
Would.

>>136185457
So it did not happen now and it happened earlier?
The essence is that maybe there will be half demon babies around

>>136189156
I'd fuck her profile but not from the front.

>>136184405
She looks like the kind of person who would fuck dead people desu. I wonder what kind of antisocial/psychological stuff drives necrophiliacs. They're almost as bad as people who like fat women.

>>136184977
Soon

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22aYCoTe-0I

>>136188808
The kid will be half demon, so...

I hope God cleanses Earth.

>>136184405
>How?

She probably used a scalpel to cut open the testes and drained the fluid into a container. Then she took a turkey baster, sucked up the "fluids" and injected said fluids deep inside her vagina.

>>136184405
fake news
sage

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Hey gang looks like we have a mystery to solve.

>>136189406
I'm pretty sure this is fake desu.

>>136184694
Chad Thundercorpse?

>>136185611
+1

>>136189545
I knew that coming in. I'm still waiting.

Also, what's up with "calle" being in captcha so much?

>>136189282
TREADED ON

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>>136184694

>>136185044
Yeah but snopes is fake news.

>>136184820
the corpse just had sperm at his dick, from the last fappening

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>>136184694
Someone, update this

>>136184522
fpbp

>>136184405
Ever hear of autoerotic asphyxiation? Maybe that's how...

>>136184522
and the gum disease Gingavitis.

>>136184405
>How the fuck is that even possible

its a woman

in other words a completely underevolved mongrel

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I read this comic

>>136184694
kek

>>136185655
this, bio dad is a nigger too

>>136190096
this literally makes no sense

>>136185866
Fucking lol

>>136188808
>Father dies day before birth/any period within 9 months
> ?

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>>136189987
>be guy related
>masterbait
>promptly die
>shit pants and hard on for a long time as pressure builds
>enter dumb female
>sit on dick
>sperm still good because 5 second rule kinda
>get preged
>arrested for fucking dead body
>be his adult son years later
>learn of fathers legacy
>child is /pol/ browser
>hfw his dad got laid without heart beat and he's still virgin

>>136189386
she was just copying the kangz goddess isis.

she fugged a corpse too.

>>136184405
Nice

>>136190488
there's a big difference between your father dying after you were conceived, and your mother raping the dead body of your father to get the sperm that eventually turns into you.

>>136184405

NICE

>>136184405

I was preparing to get angry but then I noticed this shit arousong the hell out of me. Am I alone in this predicament?

>>136191278
No, it's hot as fuark. Also she is passable for my corpse's load 2bh

>>136184694

Fucking spat my water

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>>136184694
OH GOD MY SIDES

>>136191562

It helps that she looks kinda zombie-like herself, so what minor necrophilia I have is all triggered by her sunken eyes and apathetic gloomy appearance. I feel like fucking the living shit out of her tbqh

>>136184977
IDK, she looks pretty swarthy to me.

She's definitely not pure white

>>136184522
Kek

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>worldnewsdailyreport
kys faggots

>>136184694
We need a comic showing us the difference between dead virgin and chat necrophilia.

She sucked up a cold one...

>>136184405
I live... again!

>>136184694
Can we get a quick sketch of this asap

>>136185866
underrated

>>136184405
>girls fucks multiple corpses before dating you.

and they are surprised at mgtow threads

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>>136184405
You might say he got laid to rest

>>136193191
>>136193010
>>136190013

>>136184405
hot

>>136186560
>compassion

>>136187841
Kek

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>>136185044
>(((Snopes)))

>>136188463
Got sauce?

>>136184405
How can living men even compete?

she's cute.

>>136184694
I don't get it, but I really want to

>>136193509
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HL9kaJZw8iw

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>>136193509

>worldnews
That's the tabloid that did Bat Boy. Fakeist of fake news

>>136184694
The Chadaver

>>136194050
lurk moar newfag

>>136194468
Ha!

>>136185674
Snopes is right about non political things like dead cocks.

>>136189693
kek. And idk anon.

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>>136184694
>>136193191

>>136195464
that's not nice

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>>136196160
Fucking britbong with its supreme drawing skills

>>136185737
Ejaculation is not caused by the brain

>>136196160
>chadaver
This post is best

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>>136196160

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>>136196160
10/10 m8!
Can tell you're either pro or going there soon.

>not actually dead
ffs

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>>136194468

>>136187841
underrated

>>136196210
Please put in a minimum of two years lurking before ever posting again.

>>136196160
>>136196348
Yeah, great art.

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>>136196160
That's fucking hilarious.

>>136188808
this is some JRPG-tier shit

>>136185044
if snopes says its fake then thats all the proof i need that its real

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>>136196160

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>>136196576
Thanks anon, I hope you're not being sarcastic, hers a page for my portfolio I completed today from a comic about Conan fighting his way through Ry'leh

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>>136184694

>>136184405
So niggers have pushed the "fatherless child" sterotype even further so that nigglets have no father before they are even conceived?

>>136188331
underfuckinrated

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>>136197124
This is fucking great

>>136184405
FAKE NEWS

>>136184405
I knew a guy that worked in a morgue for a while. He said people would get stiff knobs when they pump the embalming fluid into them.

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>>136197198
Not in the slightest, thanks for confirming my talent-appraisal skills!

also...
>soon

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>>136197463
Too kind anon

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>>136190555
>sperm still good because 5 second rule kinda

>>136197853
Fresh sperm cells are actually produced up to three days after death, although this story is bullshit it's possible.

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>>136194050
Fuck off nigger

>>136188542
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c9tscM5SYdM&list=PL0E38E877ACA5BE0A&index=11

>>136184694
Trump really did make america great again

>>136197198
Damn my man you have some talent, at least to an artistically untrained eye like myself

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>>136185577
Man, I just logged into my 4chan account

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>>136196160
>Chadaver

>>136186686
Is that a deep web site. Is it safe to go there Asking for a friend.
>>136189663
+1

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>>136196160
>chadaver

>>136184886
It's probably fake, but if not, I'd actually kinda like to see the video of how.

>>136184405
oh hey it's this bullshit urban legend AGAIN

>>136184405
Chadaver gets away without paying child support.

Livies btfo

>>136184405

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_erection

God has a sick sense of humor.

>>136184886
lolololol

>>136198289
Electrical stimulation of the prostate might work, that's how they do it with coma patients if the wife wants sperm but I suppose they're still alive.

>>136197978
While the story is indeed fake, it IS POSSIBLE.

>buddy from a family of moriticians
>he doesn't want to be in that biz but helped out obviously as a teen
>said that dudes who died during auto-erotic asphyxiation or were killed in a way that didn't cause massive blood loss (ie. Heart attack while fucking a hooker after 3 days of crack binging...true story) will stay hard for UP TO 6 DAYS!! They have to "artificially soften the dick by... I forgot, but it happens enough that THEY ACTUALLY HAVE A SPECIFIC TECHNIQUE FOR IT!

Not hard to imagine that a bitch could get preggers off some leftover cum/precum.

I knocked up 2 chicks accidentally, pulling out LONG before actually busting. Shit happens. Doesn't take a lot when you have Chad-grade juice.

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>>136184405
That's actually pretty metal

>>136189497
Hey Peter

>>136196160

Fucking kek

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>>136196160

>>136184694
EVEN IN DEATH CHAD STILL WINS

FUCKING CHAD GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT

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>>136198183
Thanks anon

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>>136184694
>>136196160
Kek

>>136185655
Crimestopper

>>136184522

A. that's not how it works
B. dead muscles can't contract to cause ejaculation

Retarded anglo trash.

>>136196160
>inb4 I_like_Asian_girls_and_fascim posts this on Instagram

>>136184405
>white women are even fucking corpses
truly the most disgusting women of all races

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>>136184405
Is it a ghost baby?!

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>>136196160

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>>136196160
NOICE

>>136185107
>>136188808
Imagine if the dude had a wife and his widow gets to find out this crazy lady is having her husband's child.

>>136184694
you're pretty good

>>136184405
All of the biological victory of being a father, none of the responsibility of raising a child

>>136196160
someone take this over to /r9k/, it'll kill them

>>136201201
>All of the biological victory of being a father, none of the responsibility of raising a child
Probably a black baby.

She certainly looks like a corpse abuser.

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>>136184405
I am disgusted but so so interested.

How?

>>136184522
This post should have more replies.
>>136184694
This NSA black op doesn't belong on 4chan.
>>136199451
It was a joke, son.

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>>136184405
Was rigor mortis how babby was formed?

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>>136196160
>Chadaver
you've still got it old man

Fake news. They are testing the population to see how gullible they are.

Anyway researchers if you are reading this.

Fake news is literally all news. For example

The McDonald's Cofee burn was a serious injury, PR companies hired by big firms used it to promalgate a lie amongs the media swaying public opinion to cause tort change.

And that is literally all the news is. Fake representations in order to propagandize the public.

From listen and believe rape bullshit, to political commentary.

It's literally all fake. Ever last piece of it.

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>>136184694
Well done

>>136184405
You can "milk" a semen from a dead corpse by stimulating the prostate, or use a current to stimulate the muscle to release.

>>136196160
Perfect

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>>136184694
Even in death Chad still gets laid RIP we will miss you

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>>136184405
How can you sexually abuse a dead body?

>>136207729
Why don't you email Podesta and ask him?

>>136190555
checked and keked

>>136188468
>Men do get erections shortly after necrotizing
Anon... how do you know this stuff?

>>136184886
removal of sperm through injection and insertion into her own body

I worked in a morgue and the stories I could tell you would make you pray that you end up dying in the woods where no one will ever find your body so you can decay in peace.

Pertaining to this story, I've seen an embalmer insert a hydraulic pump into an incision she made in a corpse's shaft and proceed to fuck the shit out of it.

>>136184694

Include me in the screenshot

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>>136189282

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>>136184694

>>136208858

There's 2 people you should never trust.

Anyone with a pig farm, and embalmers.

dat thousand cock stare

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>>136184405

Just imagine the look on the kid's face when he finds out mummy got knocked up by an actual corpse

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>>136184405
Absolutely Weimar

>>136196160
the anglo will rise

>>136184694
Holy fuck, someone please make a pic of this

>>136184405
>2017: why are men checking out of relationships?
>2017: men are labeled animals and can be hunted for semen
great, just amazing

>Ctrl+F Clerks
>0 results
Really? No one brought it up?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDYj5ChFwbU

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>>136196796
Underrated

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>>136184405
Time to send the sarlacc back to its home...

>>136187841
10/10

>>136185737
you know srynges, right?

>>136186560
hhaha irony is hardcore in the US

>>136184694

I'll grant you this one

>>136184405
This woman should be praised. She took death and made life.

>>136184405
http://www.snopes.com/politics/satire/stiffed.asp

fake

when will /pol learn

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>>136187366

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>>136184694

>>136197344
>>136196160
Pls someone I require more chad/virgin memes, these are too good

Snopes is fake news , they report on things like this from a liberal standpoint

Reminds me of the old dead witch you piece back together and reanimate in Fable 2. You can marry and have children with her.

>>136184405
Id fuck her and would like to watch.
Wonder If shed suck them off too or just ride them
I'm going to write her in prison, hot stuff

>>136199451
literally autistic

>>136190555
kek

>>136184405
>>136184522
>>136184814
God Damn. This chick has some serious imagination. She deserves spot on a cancer research team.

>>136184820
You can trigger ejaculation by shocking the the lower spine in the correct location (forget what the nerve is called, but it feeds your buttocks and genitalia). This is a proven effective method of retrieving sperm from corpses, and has been used by widows to allow for postmortem insemination.
>fun fact: spanking is quite literally sexual stimulation as it is essentially no different from flicking her bean... with regard to nerve stimulation

Is this the Jewish degeneracy I keep hearing about

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>>136196160

>>136185152
Can't go one thread without yellow fever fags

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>>136184405
>Wonders how this could be true.
>Doesn't wonder how he could be so fucking gullible yet still be alive.

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>>136196160

>>136208148
I work in the medical field.

>>136198881
>>136197198
You're pretty good mate

she pumped blood into the dick and looks like the kind to do just that

>>136187834
The kid's black.

>>136185383
Probably gonna sue his estate for it
Probably gonna win too

>>136188808
That's actually brilliant. You know she'd win that case.

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I read more than once on /b/ or /x/ or some other places (I forget) that almost all people who work with corpses are necrophiliac to some degree. And no body is fucking watching them. So they fuck corpses if they are in too deep.

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>>136199451

dumbass

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>>136184405
She probably gave birth to the Anti Christ.

>>136198454
And thusly I awoke from the coma

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>>136196160

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>>136196160
>not actually dead

>>136216559
Why are they all white people?

>>136216559
What the fuck is
WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT

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>>136184694
Jesus

>>136195782
they are not arbiters of truth, fuckhead. when you let others do your research for you, expect to be lied to. fucking normies

>>136184694
Rated number #1 funniest guy of this thread!

>>136184694
Hahaha i dont get it

>>136190013
>Chad isn't wearing a WOW! shirt

Lame.

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>>136184405
Those eyes have seen some shit and you can tell.

Pic related op

>>136184405
My kind of woman. There needs to be an online dating site for necros.

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>>136184405

>>136184405
>sexually abused dead bodies

Uh, no. There was no abuse. There are no victims.

>>136184995
Imagine you find this cunt at a bar after the 2 months home arrest she'll get and you eat that snatch that night

>>136196160

That's great

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>>136196160

> Chadaver

>>136219187
>eating pussy
>of a random cunt you met at a bar

>>136214187
Very interesting leaf. You will be spared

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>>136184405
>women would literally rather fuck animals and corpses than me

>>136184694
It's funny but not that funny.

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>>136184694

>>136219900
That's what I took from it.

>>136184694
Here's a well-earned (you)