If you had a time machine what would you do ?

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>>132588928

>>132588928
Go back in time to kill young adult Hitler to prevent the kikes from going "muh holocaust"

>>132588928
Bloatanon?

Please.
this is a question for /sci/, not /pol/

The reason you fail, is because you don't know us.

sage.

>>132589063
>not going back to help improve their infrastructure.

>>132588928
Go back in time to make sure the holocaust actually happened.

>>132589063
>Go back in time to kill young adult Hitler to prevent the kikes from going "muh holocaust"

this

Hitler destroyed the white race that fat fuck

>>132588928
Go to yead 1900.
Beat sense into Nicholas II. Use modern things like a phone as proof of the fact that I am not some random fucker or a spy.
If that fails - which it is likely to do, - play Rasputin for his wife, except with actual medical knowledge and far more means of proving my sainthood.
Make Russia into a constitutional republic, with the Royal Family ceremonially giving the mandate of power to the elected individuals, that kinda stuff.
Essentially something like British model, but with less tea.
Focus on logistics in the First World War, as I doubt I'll be able to despite having control of all of Russia modernize the army timely. There will be new things like better planes, arms and tanks, but fourteen years isn't enough to upgrade your whole army.
Results:
Victory in WWI, no commies, no revolution, careful and slow reforms based on that I know how to fix shit up.

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>>132588928

That's easy. I would go back in time and fight in Alexander the Great's army. I don't care about leading, being an officer, or any of that - I just want to be a part of that glorious moment in history when one man conquered nearly all of the known world to the Greeks, even stepping beyond. I just would want to be a part of that story. If not that, I would want to fight in Caesar's legions in Gaul.

Go back and kill all jews while in the desert.

>>132588928
Go back and take one of the original copies of the Hairy Amp Drooling and upload it.

Go back to 2011 and start a facecam overreacted lets play channel, sometime latter start making vines for teenagers, hire some actors to make shitty spiderman and elsa videos for my branch in 2013, that should set me up for life

>>132588928
>unzips dick

>>132591239
But they had phones back then dummy. They even had fax machines.

>>132592138
Not even worth having. Unless we turned that whole area into a dead zone to kill off illegals before they made it to the border.

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>go to 2009
>invest everything i have into Bitcoin
>become billionaire
>seclude myself from the world in complete luxury and enjoy watching it all burn down

>>132588928
Go back in time and decapitate judas before anything happened...

....Don't care if jesus condemned me for it.

>>132592175
You know full-well what kind of a phone I mean. Technologically advanced to a ridiculous, by 1900s, level. Plus on it there will be information of scale and importance immense. Maybe something that wouldn't be a thing yet by 1900, like the incoming Japanese war. That kind of stuff.

I would tell the founding fathers to word the constitution differently so it explicitly states that only Whites can be U.S citizens. I mean come on, when you word it like "all men are created equal" some fucking Kike is gonna come along and say >"see? the founding fathers weren't racist. America is for everybody REEEEE XD

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Turn the near east into a big glass bowl around 5000 BC.

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>>132588928
I'd fuck Anne Frank

Anne Frankly, I do Nazi any better options

>>132588928

I'd check out some things from modern history (I wouldn't go anywhere before antibiotics, contraceptives, or electricity), like the summer of love in San Fran, Woodstock. Watch the Lunar Landing live. See Star Wars on opening night, then I think I'd go to 1992 and just live until September 10 2001 and then jump back to 1992 and just relive the 90's over and over until I died.

>>132592734
The kikes were already here, they were in England before that. America went to shit after the civil war, perhaps leading up to it. Federalism ruined this country.

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>>132593029
fuck off reddit

>>132588928
I think I'd give the Nazis intelligence and foresight about the Eastern Front, but not just enough to keep them from ending the war for Russia. That way, the Western Allies would get more credit and bargaining chips at the peace tables, and thus keeping more eastern-european and asian countries from going commie.

>>132593029
She was a dyke

Id kill Rasputin and prevent Russias fall from grace.

>>132592986
Not a fan of civilization, huh?

SEMEN

>>132588928
>Go back in time spring of year 1936.
>Request an audience with Adolf Hitler
>He will not give me one
>predict every fucking medal correct
>They trust my timetraveller story
>Tell them to not make the dumbest combination possible to the enigma machine
>Tell them not to put Heil Hitler at the start and end of every fucking message
>England never cracks the code
>Without knowing the plans of Germany, England falls easily
>Hitler ushers in a new era of peace
>profit.

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>>132588928
Go back and tell myself never to go to 4chan, pay more attention in school and to say yes to Lauren

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>>132588928

>Someone actually went back in time to save her, and now shes on Youtube promoting lesbianism

>>132588928
I'd go back to 44BC before Julius Caesar was assassinated and warn him of the plot. Tell him everything I know about what came after for Rome and surely live a life of luxury and whores as a reward.

>>132588928
>Killing Alexander Graf von Hoyos

Hug harambe.

F

Someone post that pasta about Anon having anal intercourse with Anne Frank, please!

>>132588928
I would shit in your mothers pussy and fuck her.

>>132589063
I'd rather tell Hitler he'll be blamed for having killed 6 million jooz, so he may as well actually fucking do it.

>>132594747
Hola Plebbit!

>>132588928
I'd kill myself as a baby to cause a paradox and destroy the universe.

>>132594990
He likely killed about a million or so. Doubt the number was actually 6 million

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Go on holiday to a nice place for 2 weeks or longer and go back in time to start over again and plan another trip. Good times.

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>>132588928
Go back and make sure that pic related is a reality

>>132594095
>never to go to 4chan
Curiosity takes the better of you and you start even earlier than originally.

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>>132594245

>Caesar makes you a Console of Rome

>>132588928
>f you had a time machine what would you do
Ask CNN to dox her.

>>132593913
>Tell them not to put Heil Hitler at the start and end of every fucking message
fuck off faggot

Siege of Jerusalem, 70AD, help construct the Roman fortifications that were built outside the city walls just a bit taller than the walls that were used to crucify Hews fleeing the city (and thus being taller construction than walls all people inside saw it)
Proceed to sack the temple, grab the minora
End up on Arch of Titus as the dude with the minora in a scene of Jews BTFO immortalized in stone.

>>132595869
Jews'

>>132588928
Kill Anne Frank's dad in the camps so he can never "find" his daughter's diary.

show the british people that chamberlaine is an ethnic jew and that they have a muslim mayor of london in the future which then forces Britiain to join Germany in ww2 and they go on along with Japan and Italy to destroying soviet union and u.s.a

Go back to Ancient Rome and show them the steam machine. After I've gained their trust, I would tell them to get their shit together.

Save my 6 year old self from drunk parents and violent brother.

Probably by shooting him.

>>132595631
Nah, I've always considered what my opinion would be if someone/myself told me something from the future. If they could absolutely prove they were from the future, or me, I would do exactly as they say, since it's future me with 20/20 hindsight.

If future me told me never to go to 4chan, I would be evry curious and I'd probably notice it more (in news and online) but I would NEVER go to the site, because I know, even if it looks appealing, there's a good reason I went to all the effort to go back in time and tell myself not to do it. I even have a "code" that I've known since I was about 13 for that exact scenario. Nobody else knows the code and I will never tell anyone. If time travel is ever possible, that will be the code which authenticates it.

>>132593461
Hot

OR
Convince Himmler I'm from future, see if there really were plans to exterminate the Jews. Get him to realize like 5 years prior to Holohoax timeline that it that die Endoslung die Judische Frage needs to be implemented. Slave labor early in the war to keep munitions supply high and maintenance, more manpower at the Eastern front earlier, all the Jews dead with the capitulation of the Soviets and the West

Go back 2 million years to the Rift Valley and shoot a bunch of bipedal monkeys.

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>>132595998
Woah!

>>132588928
Stop slavery to keep blacks out of America. Stop WW2 and Hitler to prevent giving Jews a free pass to infect every higher education institute in the western world. Tell Christians to run their own fucking banks and charge interest instead of outsourcing it to Jews. Kill every Communist leader in China.

>>132595422
Funny...

>>132588928
I'd save her.

>>132594095
going back in time wont change you being a loser, mate

>>132588928
prevent Hitler to make a huge peaceful information campaign rather than going to war to counter any future propaganda after his death and make the people know that he doesn't want to invade or annex their country, but to help them making it better for ever

>>132601306
germany thought they were gonna starve to death cuz of ww1 gibs. no peace campaign could help

>>132592127
You can't unzip your dick, mate

>>132588928
I'd invade her southern front and then gas the shit out of that oven.

>>132589063
Kill Churchill so that he can't obstruct the Madagascar Plan, so that the Jews are shipped to Madagascar.

Disappointed, no hentai about this jewess posted yet.

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>>132588928
Go back to 1990, live a normal life, then in 1999 go back to 1990 again.

Rinse and repeat until death.

>>132591239
gun down lenin as he gets off the traincar from germany, just as added bonus

>>132589063
Getting jew'd so hard you think that hitler is the bad guy again

>>132588928
Go to the late 80's, find my dad and try to convince him that maybe marrying and knocking up some older woman with a disabled bastard child isn't really in his best interests, especially seeing that he's sorted himself out - he has his own car, his own paid off apartment and a nice, stable job.

And if that fails, fuck and kill my mom.

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>>132588928
Load up on ammo and firebombs, travel back in time to 1847. Kill Marx and Engels as they begin to write the Manifesto, burn down everything so no evidence of their ideas are left. Thn travel around Europe murdering any member of the League of Communists or whatever the fuck they called themselves. Following their destruction, if I have any rounds left, start working on the anarchists.

>>132594990
Hitler didn't kill any jews let alone even think about ever using an nuclear bob because that would make him like the jew. he was an elevated being that had to be above it all.
>>132595046
implying
barely 100k inmates died in the concentration camps during the war. majority died after they were liberated, especially by Soviets.

>>132588928

burn her fucking diary along with her raped dead body

>>132596357
>Tell Christians to run their own fucking banks and charge interest
the bible warns against usury whether it be from jews or christians, just dont charge interest at all

Eliminate the Rothschilds

>>132603617
this

I would go forward in time to a period where they easily materialise vehicles and would make a fuckton of Tiger 2's, get em to Kursk and then all through the rest of eastern Europe. The rest would be a cakewalk without having to fight a war on two fronts and hopefully german scientists would have figured out the kinks in the Tiger 2 so it wouldnt be a bitch to maintain

Convince young Sigmund Freud to go into banking or on a train to Poland rather than into psychology.
His influence on western culture has been arguably more devastating than Marx.

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>>132588928

>be me time travelling back to Golden Age of Greece
>time machine lands in the middle of the square outside Parthenon
>who_is_this_man?.cnn.aif
>yo my ancestors
>instantly visit/greet/meet/converse with ancient Greek philosophers and scholars
>drink wine with them
>fuck young women around Ancient Athens in ancient mystery orgies in the name of Dionysos the god of wine and partying
>mfw they don't even have to remove their clothing and are not ashamed of lusty sexual acts
>said sexual acts are publicly displayed on ancient greek jars, porn industry of the day
>fight in persian invasions
>Drink more wine and party like crazy
>fend off spartan armies
>learn to shoot a bow
>fuck some more ancient greek women
>go for a walk in the beautiful countryside outside the great walls of Athens
>shoot a boar with my newly acquired bow skills
>eat said boar and feed my waifu
>fight in more persian invasions along mythical greek warriors and their allies
>mfw enemy invaders can never compete
>mfw I conquer
>mfw this is the greatest timeline

>inb4 Ancient Athenians were gay and only fucked young boys

>>132588928
Obviously go back and kill baby Hitler with Anne Frank's mother's talons. Duh.

>>132595835
underrated nip

>>132606273
>inb4 Ancient Athenians were gay and only fucked young boys
You can't inb4 history. Even Aristotle himself dabbled.

>>132588928
>implying i don't have one already and you are not living in a test universe to see what we need to change and that we destroy this universe tomorrow

>>132588928
Go to 1944 Budapest and buy Soros a one-way ticket to Auschwitz

>>132606510
I am inb4 posting because I don't to get the obvious response. Learn 2 internet burger.

>>132606686
want*

>>132600841
in some sort of time machine...

>>132588928
You posted this exact thread earlier today you Lilly willed French fuck

Gtfo with your datamining

>>132588928
Go back to 69AD to convince the Romans to eradicate the kikes entirely the following year.

>>132588928
Slit eves throat before she can eat that bloody apple.

>>132606686
Don't get me wrong, Greece(particularly Periclian Athens) was probably the high point of ancient civilization but pederasty was an integral part of their culture. To try to brush it aside would be dishonest.

>>132588928
I give the Rothschild's courier faulty information so that they never make their fortune.

Go back to 2003 and stop moot from creating 4chan.

Save Lincoln at the theater. Ensure the Liberia plan is enacted in full. Watch the U.S. become a homogenous white imperialist country and join Germany in WW2...

>>132591239

>No Communist Revolution in Russia
>No spreading of commie plague in Europa
>No spartakists in Germany
>No threats against democratic Weimar
>NSDAP will never rise, or, if it do, never gain popularity as rempart against commies
>No WWII
>No Cold War

>>132588928
kill mayer amschel rothschild

>>132588928
Prevent all life from being born and prevent the creation of the universe.

>>132588928
Become an assassin.

>>132588928
Help young Jewish girls escape the camps in exchange for sex

Also make sure the Madagascar Plan happens no matter what

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>>132588928
No need for a time machine, we already have pic related