Kekistani priest steps

First you will need your altar. I'll attach a photo showing how it should look. It needs a base and a top of the same size, it will resemble a "J" when looked at from the front. You MUST make this with your own hands. If you buy one it is a disgrace to kek and he will not bless you. You must make this from a natural material such as wood or stone, a man-made material such as plastic or rubber is also a insult to kek. You may use things such as screws and glue but the base material must be natural. Now that you have your altar table you must set it up. Place two candles at the front corners of the top of the altar. Place a insence setup on the left side of the bottom, and a lighter on the right. On the top of the altar you should first place a kek statue in the middle, then a object of great sentimental value in between it and the right candle. This object must not have negative sentimental value, it must be from a happy memory, you are giving this happiness to kek, and if the memory is negative, you are pushing negativity onto our lord. Leave the space in between the statue and the left candle blank, this is where you will put your pin when you go to pray (any good kekistani should have a pin depicting pepe that he or she wears or at least carries with him or her daily). On the wall behind your altar you must paste a depiction of kek, be it printed or your own artwork. On the front of your altar you should nail a small kekistani flag.

Once your altar is set, you should know how to properly praise kek at it. You should have a cushion in front of it for your comfort. Make sure the room where your altar is in is dark to some degree and silent. Set up your insence but do not light it yet. Remove your pin and place it between the statue and the left candle. First you will sit at the altar completely naked, clothes taint the ritual. Then, grab the lighter in your hand. You will next say "The fire of kek was ignited in the right" and light the right candle. Then, you will say "and lit up the bottom" and light the insence. Next, say "and will soon consume the left", and light the left candle. This is a nod to the kekistani political movement. Now, grab a phone, speaker, or anything that can play shadialy, then pull up the song but do not begin playing it yet. Say "In the name of kek, the prophecy, shadialy." and begin to play the song. Quickly set the device down next to the lighter on the right side of the altar's base. Close your eyes and fold your hands in your lap, the ritual has begun.

Clear your mind completely. The only thing running through it should be shadialy. You must not move, don't itch or adjust yourself, this disturbs the ritual. If done right, you will feel the need to sway. Give into this urge and allow your body to move on it's own, this is your body becoming intune with kek. Do this throughout the duration of the song. When the song ends, turn off the device, and open your eyes. Say "When all is done, the left will cease to exist" and put out the left candle. Say "the bottom will become the right" and snub out the insence. Now say "and kek will have succeeded in all duties to the world" and blow out the right candle. Now, stare at the depictions of kek on your altar. Say "Kek, I ask of you now to give me your prophecy". Close your eyes again and stay still for around 30 seconds, but do not count, your mind should be blank. You will not receive a prophecy the first time, rather after doing this many, many times. Once you receive your first prophecy, you are now a priest of kek. This prophecy can be anything, from a single word to a prediction of an event. You may not know what this prophecy is, but you will know that it is kek when kek speaks to you. You should perform this ritual as often as you can, to become a kek priest quicker. When you have completed asking for a prophecy, you may also ask kek for other things, be it luck, money, etc, and kek may answer if he sees your cause is true.

If you choose to follow the path of a kek priest be warned, the feeling you experience when allowing kek to consume your body is addicting, and you may feel the need to do it more often than you intend. Good luck brothers, and praise kek!