Rowdy Cow Hampshire hooligans have attacked one of our greatest musicians!
Massholes unite! We cannot allow this to go unnoticed!
We'll live free and you NHers can effin die!
https://www.boston.com/news/local-news/2017/06/18/keytar-bear-allegedly-attacked-by-new-hampshirites-near-faneuil-hall
How dare you savages attack us!
You can pry our keytars from out cold dead hands!
Come and take it, cowfuckers!