My European Cousin is moving to America: How can I man him up?

suck his dick

he's going to get laid more than you ever will based on his accent alone.

best thing you can do is fuck off to your bedroom

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>implying he's not about to man you up, or have you sleep wi' da fishes

>>130079544
Show him all the shit texans do for fun.

>>130079544
Wow, disrespecting family like that. Truly a piece of shit OP kys

>>130079544
What do you mean by "Give him an American name"?

Are you going to call him Jhon or something?

>What should I do to "Americanize" him
Kill yourself,, destroyer of culture.

/thread


kys OP, looks like you tried too hard to fit in

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>>130079544
get him some sprite bottles!

>>130079708
This

>>130079898
This is actually a good idea

I'm going to take him hiking, to the gun range, to the Gym.

I will take him to a good Texan BBQ restaurant.

>>130080020
I bet he is a good guy but with the wrong Eurocuck culture. Thank god I am American.

>>130080247
Yes
I refuse to call him by his wop name. His name is Antionio so I will call him Anthony

>>130080383
Kek

>>130079544
Gun range.
Drinking out to get a feel for the local population.
And a whole lot of other cool shit you do with your cousin.

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>>130079544
Get him an Asian Girlfriend.

tell him how to make moonshine give him some hilbilly nickname and tell him how to shoot guns and shet>>130079544

>>130079677
i laffed

>>130079544
By fucking him in the ass. Before he can man up, you have to teach him to take it like a man.

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>>130079544
give him the full dose
And after that teach him how to fight and prepare
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yoqMBCQTfuk

Well, to make him human follow these steps:
>make sure he eats meat only.
>check under his bed to ensure he is not hiding any pasta or pizza.
>tie his arms behind his back so he stops talking with his hands.
>burn all his effeminate clothes.

>>130081243
What part of Texas? I'm Grapevine.

>>130079544
If that's him he'll be fine. He will be drowning in pussy.

gym is gay
shooting is ok

>>130081243
What am I a fuckin clown?
I'm here to fuckin amuse you?

>>130084272
Gym is gay.
Buy body armor and do burpee contests with eachother if you wanna show him real Murica skillz.

>>130079544
>My 15 years old cousin is moving from Italy to Texas
This alone will inevitably result in him manning quite a lot. You don't really need to do anything. The 32% Mexican and 12% black population will see that he grows up faster and becomes red pilled.

Which begs the question: why is he moving here? Does he think American culture is like a 90s pop music video?

>>130079544
Let's see a pic of him.

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>>130079544
Dude, a lot of Europeans are alpha as fuck compared to sensitive little American faggots. This goes for Texans as well.
You think you need to help him, but when he comes of age he's going to have prettier women than you and a better paying job. Screen cap this because I'm right as fuck, you stupid hillbilly.

>>130084421
Well, if you build your workout routine around "aesthetics"(i.e i want to fuck) then you're gay.
Utility is what important.
So climbing, gymnastics and martial arts only acceptable gym classes.

Buying him a pistol is expensive, he needs to earn it.

Make him to outside chores often, a mans job is to maintain the outside of the house, the vehicles, and the appliances.

He will probably need to be taught these things, but that's ok.

Talk to him, be a good mentor.

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>>130084668
>An army half the size of yours beats your ass up into pennsylvania
>Holocaust a bunch of yanks in a literal death camp in georgia
>Yanks send a bunch of "female spies" to confederate camps to fuck the shit out of the soldiers and oddly enough don't find out any intel
>Sherman's march to the sea turns into a pattern of us military strategy that ends up in the disasters in viet nam and iraq/afghanistan
>The only two states in the us that are getting more non hispanic white every year are south carolina and tennessee
Man I wish we could lose again

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>>130084905
This is the only place you beat us, Russian.
It's impossible to convince an American that huge man tits are gay.

>>130080383
> Go to America
> Don't assimilate
Just like those refugees of peace

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>>130085143
I don't really give a shit.
That pic is just good to troll hillbillies with, that's all.

>>130085592
Oh and don't forget:

>Yanks elected a nigger president


I don't care much either. I like to troll yankees on this board.

>>130079677
Teach him how not to rip the skin

>>130079898
Hog hunting. Splurge and get a helicopter ride.

>>130084905
I agree with this completely.
I haven't been in a gym in over 2 years and I just do prison style workouts at my house and still have strength approaching Super Human levels.

.t former Marine w/ MCMAP blackbelt and pushed my thin '5"11 frame to hold 210lbs of solid muscle at my peak power level

>>130081243
>so I will call him Anthony
Gay. Call him Tony.

>>130079544
Take him hunting.

Redpilled him on women. Being a foreigner, silly American bitches will get slip n slide wet the second he starts talking assuming he's not a total autist. He will inevitably waste his time of one these whores and wind up in prison for " rape" if you don't educate him.

>>130085888
This

watch anime with him, show him your waifu, get him a kekistan flag

>>130079544

Introduce him to American girls. Being Italian his game is going to be ten million times better than yours. Learn from him. Skip the gym crap unless he already goes there on his own. Italian gym culture is different than in the rest of the world too, they don't use oly equipment.

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>>130085703
>Thinks I'm a Yank

Stupid hillbilly. How do you think I've come to know your kind so well?

>>130079544
Your european relative will most likely get more poontang than your obese american ass. Just watch and learn from the european

>>130085836

Can you give advice on such a routine?

>>130085143
>Tennessee
>becoming more non-Hispanic
Where the hell is this happening? South Knox and I never seem to stop seeing them.

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>>130079544
Why are you calling him a cuck piece of shit? Stop being such a shitty family member and just show him how Americans live when he gets here. You should be a role model, and he doesn't need an American name, Just work out with him and show him how to shoot gats, how to fix your own vehicle, and other basic man shit. Don't be a douche, being Italian he's probably better with women than your faggot ass will ever be.

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>>130086408
Well I achieved my SSJ form while in the military still when I had unlimited free nutrient dense food and plenty of spare time.

However I now walk around at 175lbs and what I mostly do is this:

>3 sets of 10-burpees with 40lb body armor
>3 sets of 20-incline pushups (w or w/o armor depending on mood)
>3 sets of 10-lunges (same)
>3 sets of 20-squats (same)
>4 sets of 5-handstand pushups
>3 sets of 100-jumprope (fuck wearing armor, my knees are already shitted)
>3 sets of 8-vertical jump (max effort, no armor)
Abs, maybe a 2 mile run at RUN pace, NOT jog a few times a week

I currently don't have a pullup bar but I try to do rows with something heavy around the house to keep back muscles in shape

>>130085712
$4500 his cousin and him could shoot full auto rifles at pigs for two hours.

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>>130084653
Thoughts?

>>130079544
Show him 4chan.......

>>130090694
Yep
This guy needs help

>>130079544
OP likes incest

>>130090694
Is he autistic :'(

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>>130088485
breddy gay

>>130079544
Get him to start lifting
Wrestle and box with him
Go hunting
Eat meat and drink beer

>>130079708
>girls like broken english
Lol

>>130090694
Give him a buzzcut and some normal plain clothes

>>130079818
>complexity = intelligence
Bongbrains detected

>>130090694
Ouch, best of luck to you m8. Good taste in Hawaii shirts though, but tell him to unbutton the top two buttons.

As for his treatment:
>get a haircut
>take him out hunting/shooting
>take him to the gym
>take him to somewhere where there's chicks he can pick up. US grills like European boys so use that to his advantage

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>>130091214
please do not lewd the library assistants
thank you

>>130086248
This
>>130086017
And that

>>130086406
True, you do have a way of seducing black men

>>130079544
Basically everything in this video

https://youtu.be/7foqCcOsI54

>>130079544
I imagine he's not circumcised. Give us a peak.

>>130091404
The ability to transfer the complex into the simple is a great show of intellect and understanding

>>130079544
Have sex with him

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>>130079544
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foreskin_restoration

>Americanize him
Have him speak in ebonics
Have him smoke and drink
Have him bow to cut dick toucan beaked Jews

>Give him an American name
Goyim #45585813

>>130079544
How'd you get such a qt cousin?

>>130079544

Tell that little faggot to start lifting weights. Fucking bean pole.

>>130091830
Keep telling yourself that.
What's the difference between sex and gender again? Oh right you guys have been confusing the entire world because your stupid language makes 15 words say the same thing.

>>130090694
looks like a total faggot

>>130079544

unless he's from sweden or germany he's more tougher than any american, so no need to worry.
people here fight with fists and knives while you just shoot people.

>>130091300

>ayoo hol up gurl das sum fine ass
i think they won't have a problem with his cousin

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>>130081243

>shooting at inanimate objects will make him a man
AHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAH

also
>antonio
bitches wet themselves at this foreign names.
imagine being called fucking Tony the tiger, lmao

>>130090694

looks like a fag but literally a teenage girls wet dream, hope he leaves any pussy for you.

>>130093273
He's my wet dream. I hope he leaves some boipussy for OP.

>>130079677
Kek wills it

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>>130079677

Show him how to linch

>>130091404
Complex languages have quick information rates.

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>>130091300
I have to disagree with you on that one.

>>130093824
kek

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>Amerisharts unironically consider themselves as uncucked despite being 54% white and interracial and cuck culture all stems from the US and is far more prevalent there

>>130093981
And English is not complex at all relative to many other europoor languages spoken in tard countries

>>130091544
>>130091230

>killing animals will make him le manly LOL xD
maybe also take babies' pacifiers away if the goal is to be as pathetic and cowardly as possible

>>130092097
Those aren't the same thing

>>130090694

That's pretty much what I'd pictured when you said 15 year old European.

>>130094316
>le 54 meme
Yes we are technically 54% white but races in America generally stick together so you have a shit load of niggers in big cities, spics all over the place in the desert, then cities full of whites in between with very tiny portions of poos and chinks in between. You Europeans forget how huge of a landmass America is. The only shitty thing is it affects elections because naturally hispanics and blacks vote for more left leaning policies.

>>130094316
Yup.

>>130094797
All of what you just said is also true for Europe, yet most European countries are around 90% white.

>>130090694
he's got the look that makes teen girls squirt all over the place, 2bh

>>130095013
That won't be the case of current immigration and birth rates continues.

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>>130094664

>>130079544
Drugs, alcohol, get him laid, make him fight someone.

>>130090694
He's gonna be fucking blonde chunky Texan bitches by the dozen. God speed Antonio you greasy fuck

>>130079544
Cut off his foreskin and sell it to a cosmetic company.

>>130095209
won't be the case for countries that leave the EU and current uncucked ones

>>130094550
Actually, it's one of the most complex languages there is, both in text and use.

It also has the highest spoken information rate among all languages in use today.

>>130079544
Don't let him make the mistake I made. The truth is that if he's not a cuck, he will hate living in the U.S.

>>130079544
>America

Jerk him off in his sleep, call him a faggot when he wakes up.

>>130094550
Italian is a relatively simple language, compared to English.

>>130079677
Checked
FPBP

>>130079544
Teach him to edge for 8 hours straight while watching black and white silent footage of nazi rallies

>>130079544
Uncuck California. That way we all win.

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>>130091214
Dude why, I think thats a pretty good program for a non try hard

>>130079544
kill him, and he will come back stronger than you could ever imagine

>>130079544

Take him and spend a month camping out in the woods with no electronics and no equipment but military surplus, either nature will awaken his inner masculinity, or he'll be forever a cuck. That's what my great-grandad did to my grandad, what my grandad did my dad, what my dad did to me, and what I plan to do to my sons one day.

>>130079544
>>130085888

Trips don't lie OP. Kek wills it.

>>130079544

how is he moving to italy? you cant get a greencard ffor him as a cousin

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>>130094558
Can't tell if this is bait or you're just a colossal faggot. Not even that guy.

>Muh defenseless animuls

2/10 I responded.

>>130079544
>How can I man him up?
Take him to La Grange.

Honestly, just buy him a gun and take him to a shooting range from time to time, maybe go eating stake with him or whatever else Americans do we eu goys can't do/do worse.
Not a lot desu.

>>130090694
Bieber?
Buzz his fucking hair. That flamboyant shit will attract queers and jail bait.

yall nigas dont even realise its someoen that used to have a flag like me and now is roleplaying to be american

>>130079544
Hate to break it to you but girls fall like dominoes for Western European accents. He's probably gonna smash even more pussy than it he did in Italy

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>>130090694
Wow, all he needs is a better haircut and clothes and your Texan cowgirls will be riding him like a bull. Have him get a Hitler Youth cut.

>>130079708
>>130091300
yup.
any european accent will get panties dropping in minutes.

>>130079544
gym and guns are cool; but you're gonna be taking the ugly friend of whatever girl he runs into because just being italian is going to get him mad gash.

he's gonna be a lanky accented who appreciates wine and is arrogant as fuck because he's italian and americans have no culture or whatever.

he'll probably get laid just flying over here or in the airport before you even meet him.

>>130081243
He's gonna keep Antonio and between that name and the accent, he's gonna be knee deep in pussy.

>>130081243
Take him to a real pizza shop.
That'll blow his mind.

>>130084668
have you been living under a rock for the past decade?
European men are WAY more feminized and brain washed than americans. This is mostly due to the much harsher liberal conditioning they go through in grade school

>>130079544
You ever watch Clockwork Orange?