Jokes

>>129829863
Literally ask b, they know them all. Do you want anti semitic jokes? Nigger jokes?
That's mostly what you will get here.

What's the difference between a priest and a pimple? pimples come on a childs face after puberty.

>>129830107
That's what I am hoping for.

whats one foot long, blue, and makes women scream? cot death

>>129830264
What separates humans and animals?

The Mediterranean.

>>129829863
Why did so many niggers get shot in Vietnam?

The Sgt yelled "get down" and they got up and started dancing.

Who would win in a fight between the French and Italians?

Neither, the Italians would switch sides, and the French would surrender.

How do you start a Jewish pride parade?

Roll a penny down the street.

How was copper wire invented?
Two jews fighting over the same penny.

What the difference between a pizza & a jew?

Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

Whats long black and smelly?

The welfare line.

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?

Slap her

File: 1496551797908.jpg (235KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

235KB, 500x500px

>>129829863

File: irish-sunglasses.jpg (42KB, 640x553px) Image search: [Google]

42KB, 640x553px

>>129829863

How do you get a black kid to stop jumping on your bed?
Put velcro on the ceiling.

How do you get him down?
Invite some Mexicans and tell them is a piñata party.

Herf drrf drrf

i dont know if this translates from finnish but
why do niggers have such big eyes?
so they could see more hunger

>>129830472
I like this one.

>>129831607
What do you tell a girl with two black eyes?

Nothing, you already told her twice.

>>129831686
What's the meaning exactly? We might be able to translate it if you explain.

A woman was giving birth in a hospital. The doctor takes the baby and starts punching it as hard as he can. Then he throws the newborn to the nurse, who begins stabbing it with a scalpel. "Oh my fucking god what are you doing!?!?" screams the mom as her baby is the tossed out the window. The mom begins shrieking uncontrollably as her infant hurls into the concrete. "Ma'am calm down." says the doctor, "We were just kidding. It was already dead. :)"

>>129829863
What always breaks when you give it to a toddler?
Their pelvis.

What's the worst part of fucking a five-year old?
Getting the bloodstains out of your clown costume.

What're three things you can't give a nigger?
A black eye, a fat lip, and a job.

How does a nigger know she's pregnant?
She takes her tampon out and all the cotton's been picked off.

Just off the top of my head.

File: duck.jpg (8KB, 480x360px) Image search: [Google]

8KB, 480x360px

This fucking thread

>>129831686
>>129831879
i got more

Why niggers have so big eyes?
they have to see where the bus is waiting through all the flies

Why do niggers have so big ears?
So they could hear the bus over other screaming niggers

Why niggers have so big swollen lips?
Because when they try to go into bus, the driver slams them on the mouth "Not this bus!"

Why niggers have so big nose?
*puts 2 fingers on the niggers nose* "follow me, i lead you to the right bus".


Lost in translation, and works better when acted live, but hey, joke is a joke.

I like my women like I like my Windows OS: 7

Why cant black people drive convertibles? because the wind will catch their lips and slap them to death.

What do you call a black man who becomes President?
Nigger.

Fat white chick hears how hung niggers are, goes to the ghetto, picks one up, and takes him home. She strips, lays on the bed, and says "Now do what you do best!"
So he takes the tv and jumps out the window.

>>129829863
What kind of noise annoys an oyster?

A noisy noise annoys an oyster.

What do you get when you stomp on a dead baby while wearing gold shoes?
A hardon.

What do you call a black man flying a plane?
Captain, you fucking racist.

How many Jews can you put in an astray?
6 million.

What were Davy Crockett's last words?

Who called for all these roofers?

>>129832730
Forgot to take off sage

Its almost as cold as in Ryssäs (russian) hell!

Syrian kids with no hands were playing football and iraki kids with no legs were sitting and watching.

Suddenly one of the syrians kicked the ball accidentally in the crowd and yelled laughing "could you guys kick the ball back?" :DD

One of the iraki kids shouted "go fuck yourselves!"


Get it? :DDD

When I was younger, I got kicked out of elementary school for exposing myself and trying to get the girls to touch. My mom got very frustrated with me. She says "Anon, this is the third school this year you've been kicked out of! Maybe teaching isn't for you."

>>129831686
I don't think it translates, but it got a chuckle out of me.

How do you circumcise a redneck?
Kick his sister in the chin.

A Catholic priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they spot a 6-year old kid playing. The priest says to the rabbi, "I'd really like to screw that kid." The rabbi turns to the priest and asks, "Out of what?"

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen?
Two in the front, two in the back, and six million in the ashtray.

What's the difference between a nigger and a park bench?
A park bench can support a family of three.

How do you starve a nigger to death?
Put his food stamps in his work boots.

What's the best part of fucking twenty two year olds?
There's twenty of them.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
Feminists can't change anything.

>>129832822
:--------DDDDDDDD

>>129832314
Are all finnish jokes related to busses?

What's the best thing about fucking twenty eight year olds?
There's twenty of them.

Chinese couple had a black baby.
Named him Sum Ting Wong.

Every day for 20 years, (((Irving Schwartz))) prays that he wins the lottery.
After 20 years, the heavens open up, and God says "If you want to win the lottery, you have to buy a fucking ticket!"

What's a Jew cheerleader say?
Get. That. Quarter. Back.

How do you get a nun pregnant?
You fuck her.

>>129831396
also about 7 bucks

>>129829863
How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? 9 months
This post is satire

File: Fingerpori2.gif (141KB, 1000x325px) Image search: [Google]

141KB, 1000x325px

>>129833003
No, just these about the looks of a niggers.


House was visited by burglar and a detective was called to investigate.

"hmm hmm, this burglary was made by Swede."
-"what, how do you know?!"
"theres shit on the kitchen floor, all the trash has been eaten and dog is raped".


Damn, these jokes actually get more funny, when its lost in translation.

>>129831150
holy kek

File: Feedingthehungry.jpg (39KB, 360x480px) Image search: [Google]

39KB, 360x480px

This picture explains the niggers big eyes = seeing hunger joke.

>>129832828
lmao

What is a jewish dilemma?
Free ham

Why do jews cut their dicks?
Their women cant resist something that is 10% off

Why cant you shoot a gypsy?
He has already stolen your bullets

Whats worse than the holocaust?
6 million jews

A man visits the house of the local priest, looks at the wall and tells him:
- Hey thats a very nice icon you have of St. George and the Dragon
- Fuck you, thats a picture from my wedding