Survival tips for armageddon?

>>1058615
No.

File: ultimate warrior.jpg (109KB, 792x550px) Image search: [Google]

109KB, 792x550px

>>1058615

Have Bruce Willis on speed dial.

>>1058615
Stop being a faggot would help you.

>armageddon
>survival
pick 1

Been prepping for when the sun falls out of orbit and roasts the earth. I have have enough food,water,and bullets to last me 15 years with 4 people.

>>1058702
Where are you going to live, the Arctic core?

>>1058734
>sun falls out of orbit

>>1058615
I'm prepping for the heat death of the universe
Got a yoga pose all ready
I'm going to stick my head between my legs, and kiss my ass goodbye

>>1058615
Accept Jesus into your heart.

>>1058930
Only valid answer in this thread

>>1058702
Mental case.

>>1058734
In my bunker.

>>1059375
Meant to reply to
>>1058930

File: 1459005878481.jpg (152KB, 1188x1599px) Image search: [Google]

152KB, 1188x1599px

>>1058766
Don't you wish there was some way to stop the eventual heat death of the universe?

File: anonymous-09-10-16-sat-02-46-03-no-74188535-file-image-png-252-kb-3709224.png (57KB, 500x300px) Image search: [Google]

57KB, 500x300px

>>1058761

>>1059482
What for you're not even gonna live that long

Nobody cares, maybe by then they would be so smart they can make new universes and shit

File: 0112172341.jpg (1MB, 2560x1536px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 2560x1536px

The sun is in decline. Why do you think the earth is heating up? People can blame man made fossil fuels but in reality its the sun creeping ever closer to the earth do to its declining orbit. While the surface becomes a barren waste I will be able to live out my life in comfort underground till the sun begins to creep away from the earth enough to come out of my hole.


Im ready.

>>1059451
>>1059517
If your bunker doesn't have a "broil" setting, it will.

>>1058702
>when the sun falls out of orbit
Exactly how many centuries of human history did you miss?

>>1059517
Have you ever even seen a school let alone been in one?

>>1059562
>>1059642
>>1059644
Make fun of me now.

But look around you why do you think the ice caps are melting? Why do you think we are getting these massive shifts on weather patterns?


Its all because the suns orbit is in decline and coming closer to earth.

>>1060372
>Make fun of me now.
Well, for one, it's actually the earth's orbit; the sun is stationary (in relation to the solar system).

Also, while the orbit of the earth is in decline, the rate is negligible, so much so that we'd never see a 0.00001% difference in temperature during our lifetimes.

Also, we're currently in the recession phase of an ice age, so while increased carbon emissions may accelerate warming, the warming was going to happen regardless.

>>1059517
>do

> Survival tips for armageddon?
Repent or perish. (See >>1058930 for detailed instructions.)

>>1058933
>>1061414
Witnessed

>>1058930
/thread

theres literally nothing else you could do; it's kinda the definition of armageddon..

>>1059517
nah, stratigraphic data shows its just part of the standard milankovitch cycles, we're just on the upward limb currently

>>1060372
but anon, the changing weather is due to aluminium particles pumped into the stratosphere to control weather for farming, resulting in an unbalanced global climate

File: monk_001sss.jpg (67KB, 240x314px) Image search: [Google]

67KB, 240x314px

>>1058930
Am starting the Abba life, the best prep going.

File: tanks.gif (2MB, 500x400px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 500x400px

Wait. I heard the earth is flat?

>>1059482
Insufficient data for meaningful answer

>>1062388
Now thaylt you have witnessed, go now, and be a witness among men
Christ be with you

>>1062820
He ain't with me, he's in the next tent. A nice guy, shared his coffee with me over the fire.

>>1058615
You can eat the white inner bark membrane of any pine tree and it's a decent amount of calories for little work.
Also, dog food. Who knew!?

>>1059517
>>Due to its declining orbit.
The sun's declining orbit...
Thinking the sun orbits any planet other than (to the tiniest amount) Saturn (which also still orbits the sun... Obviously.)

>>1058930
>>1058933
>>1062644
>(((Christianity)
Go to hell, this is a White man's board only paganism is allowed here