/o/, have you ever... masturbated with engine oil?

Pretty sure I'd get sick, so no

Nah u?

Just stay away from "high mileage" additives, they will swell the bellend.

I'm so fucked up

That looks like auto tranny fluid to me but I guess it's too far forward.

>>17133407
>engine oil
Waiting for the additives to give you cancer on your penis. Then it will have to be amputated.

>>17133407
there was a thread back in the early day's of /o/ were some retard did exactly that and reported back with very ill effects
not recommended

>>17133633
The real secret for those grow a bigger dick ads

>>17133407
you think gay dudes use tranny fluid?

It does feel kind of sexy when it's nice and warm but ultimately I think it would be too gritty.

anyone else get an erection from touching warm engine oil? something about how gooey/slick it is just does things to me

>>17133855
>too gritty.
Use fresh oil, cheapass.

>>17133720
Holy fuq screen cap? I've been here since 2009 never seen it

>>17133843
No, they use raw feces and hate transsexuals.

>>17133407

No, but I had a wart on my finger that turned black and fell off after I changed my oil one day. I'm assuming the oil didn't do good things to it and killed it. Seems more effective/less painful than the usual methods of wart removal.

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>>17133937
Yup.

>>17133407
Nigga, I don't want dick cancer

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>>17133648

>>17133407
>not using gear oil

75w-140 is where it's at.

>>17136273
Then it wouldn't be all warm from being inside my beautiful car. That's not sexy at all.

>>17133705
fwd

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>>17139236

>>17133407
Unlike your hand or arms, the skin on a penis is thin and not as tough. So the chemical additives in the oil will be absorbed into your bloodstream easier.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/2612787

If you have to have the feeling of thick goopy oil, you should just use cooking oil. At least that is guaranteed non-toxic.

>>17141836
How does one thicken cooking oil

>>17133708
No one who would post in a thread like this is using their penis for anything but pissing anyways, no loss.

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>>17133407
No, because my parents aren't siblings and my chromosome count is normal.
>mfw i just read a thread on /k/ where a female aviation tech used jet fuel as lube and a female marine masturbated with the buffer for her service rifle

We /b/ now

>>17142170
Even without moderation and some of the worst tripfags around, we'll never be that shit.

>>17142138
Kek that's great, link to those threads?

>>17141952
Cornstarch

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>>17141836
>the chemical additives in the oil will be absorbed into your bloodstream easier

So could you get drunk by putting alcohol in your pee pee?

>>17142138
Just read that one too, that was fucked.

>>17144005
if you really want quick absorption, shove it up your ass

>>17133407
Once.

>>17142138
Are you sure you belong on this website

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Just find a carfu

Inb4 thread 404

>>17143203
It's archived now. But among those stories was a gem about a guy that had to unclog a drain in some female showers. Two words which will send shivers into your guts; blood mushrooms.

>>17144442
Honestly, sometimes I wonder that, too. But I just try to keep away from the worst autism and ignore the really retarded threads. That usually works.

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>>17144664
>>17144651
>>17144640
>>17144632
>>17144611
>>17144600
>>17144590

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>>17144886
Were there pics?

>>17144951
Thank all that is fuck there weren't. I was just about to eat breakfast and the mental image alone made me want to go and buy all of the drain cleaner.

>>17144005
I can actually imagine Itsuki asking Iketani a question like this, and then Iketani does that confident lean and says >>17144167.

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>>17144912

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>>17144951
Here I capped the post, Anonymous always delivers

One time when I was around 16, I saw one of those pictures on /b/ showing how to make a poor man's fleshlight. Being the horny teenager I was, I grabbed a cup, put two sponges in it, and then put a latex glove on the cup. I was pretty proud of myself. The only problem was, I didn't have any lube. I was in the kitchen looking for a lube substitute and I figured that dish soap would work. Well, I fucked that fucker good and it felt alright, it wasn't terribly special or anything but I suppose it was better than just jacking off. Once I finished, I threw it all away. However, being the lazy fuck that I was, I didn't wash off my dick. The next day I woke up and it felt like my crotch was on fire. I pulled down my pants and my dick looked like a fucking molting snake. I didn't really know what to do but it hurt like a mother. Then I got an erection and all the dry skin started cracking and I was in even more pain.


Don't be like me.

>>17133407
Trust me, looks like a good idea, so much regret. DONT DO IT OP!!!

>>17146076
/k/: a magical place

>>17133407
You'll get a rash. From one, it being on your skin. And two, you beating your meat with a substance that has the ability to give a rash

>>17146076
>women are just as civilized and intelligent as Jews and Muslims.
No surprises there.

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>>17144590
>>17144600
>>17144611
>>17144632
>>17144640
>>17144651
>>17144664