This job should only take me about ten minutes *bolt shears*

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>mfw everytime

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>>17103078

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>>17103078

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>>17103078
>tfw

[DROPING TOOLS IN THE ENGINE BAY INTENSIFIES]

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>>17103078

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>is changing alternator
>spend an hour going over everything make sure I did it right
>just about done
>bolt everything back in place
>wont turn over
>wont turn over
>rage intensifies
>look at everything
>seems fine
>keeps telling myself I did everything right
>frantically looking for what I fucked up on
>makes sure battery is hooked up
>it is
>why wont it turn over?
>maybe I missed something hooking up the alternator
>take everything apart again
>everything hooked up
>ree intensifies
>forgot that the battery was dead because alternator decided to sudoku itself and I had to basically run the battery till it was about to die so I could get home
>jumps battery with other truck
>it starts
>mfw i forgot battery was died and took everything apart to see if i missed something

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>no power to the driving lights in the 7-pin trailer socket?
>probably just a cable come loose

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>>17103078
Oh, put the flywheel bolts onto the crank without the flywheel, I'll just... Oh wait

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>>17104916
>he underestimated what we meant when we said don't drive with a cracked flexplate

>>17104895
This is me.

>Changing motorcycle windshield
>Plastic screws holding the shield in place break after 1×10^-15 nm of torque
>Buy new stainless bolts from Home Depot with a 10mm head because everything on a metric bike is 10mm
>Bolt heads are too thick for small trim piece to go over top
>Grind them down
>Finally fits

Fuck plastic fasteners

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>installing OEM foglights
>instruction manual says 45 minutes
>have to feed thick wire to bulkhead
>destroy my hand on hard metal edges behind dash blindly trying to find where the wire feeds through
>find out there's two layers of bulkhead and the wire slipped between them
>have to remove bumper
>snap two rusted bolts, round off one
>have to get the grinder to saw off the back of the rounded off bolt and replace it with a nut
>don't even bother with the snapped bolts
>bottom off the bumper is now held on by two points instead of six (2 bolts were already broken)
>have to drill 4 holes into a THICK steel beam on the front of the car
>it's so strong I have to drill 4 times with smaller drills to make one 4mm hole
>break a lot of drills
>have to saw 2 slots into bumper for some brackets
>find out later the slots weren't large enough so the bumper didn't seat properly
>other small annoyances

Installation time was one day.

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>change front lower control arms
>bolt is so corroded to shit that it rounds off the second you dare to look at it
>inner metal bushingis completely stuck to bolt so it won't spin freely
>tear apart old rubber trying to turn bolt+bushing anyway
>bushing gets pulled straight through subframe because of excessive force
Suspension work in countries that salt the roads is hell.

Kill them all johnny...

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>>17103078
>wheel stud snaps
>have to either take the hub apart or cut into it to replace it
GOD DAMMIT HONDA WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE SO HARD?

>>17105023
>OEM install
>Requires fucktons of retarded fabrication
I think you're just an idiot.

>get bull bar for new
Oh, ive installed these before, should only take an hour!
>open instructions
>Remove entire bumper, grill, head light assembly.... fuck you, remove the entire front end for something that nornally is like a 4 bolt job.

>>17105104
How is it that much? Does it attach to something else than the underside?

>>17105096
It was a very rare and expensive option from 20 years ago dude. The car wasn't designed to house foglights from the factory and had no designated places for it besides the gaping radiator holes in the bumper next to the license plate. The people who bought it let the dealer install it anyway. It looks like an aftermarket install but there are pretty much no foglights avaible with those dimensions and brackets so none will fit without sticking out.

So yes, the manufacturer did indeed ask me to saw in my bumper and drill holes in my frame.

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Go to vacuum car after it rains. My spare tire is almost floating.

>>17104916
>>17104921
Go away dirty wagie.

>>17104895
>>17105047
need more rage repair stories

>>17105841
>wagie
citation required

>>17106586
Alright, I have another for you:

>helping dad fix his car
>needs new front brake hoses, no big deal
>except they haven't been changed in at least 15 years
>EVERYTHING is corroded to hell and back
>everything that needs to move is completely stuck
>end up having to bend new metal brake lines that go on the calipers as well as using all new nipples
>one side removed
>ready to install new hose
>it just barely reaches
>what.jpg
>turn steering all the way to one side, hose is pulled tight like a piano string
>this_isnt_good.png
>he bought hoses for an Audi A6 because the site said they'd fit
>the connectors are the same but the hoses are too fucking short
>end up having to buy new hoses AGAIN, car just sits there with brakes one side completely disassembled
>what should take maybe an afternoon took multiple days

And as a final stinger
>bleed brakes
>still feel spongy as all hell
>turns out most of the fluid drained out and air got into the ABS module

>>17105809
fix it right faggot

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>bolt shears
>head breaks off
>10mm socket flys into engine bay
>never hits the ground
>part doesnt fit
>cant reassemble car because broken bolt
>its raining
>ANON U SHOULDA TAKEN IT TO A MECHANIC
>no more pb blast
>engine stud snaps off flush
>you find more broken shit while working

>brakes spongey
>ask guy at Sullivan tire to check the brakes while getting oil change
>"Yeah looks like your gonna need brakes"
>buys rotors and pads, sets day to do brakes
>jack up and pull tire off
>Brakes are almost brand new from when I did them correctly over a year ago
>Don't need brakes
>either vaccum problem or needs new booster
well looks like im not doing that

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>>17106586
alright, >>17104895 again
keep in mind im not a mechanic, I just prefer saving a few bucks and learning how to fix things

my original story happened a few weeks ago, this is another alternator one; the one above died for some reason after 3 1/2 months of use

>be me
>driving home from work
>beginning to mid of january is japanistanada
> its fucking -32C
>battery light comes on
>ok, weird
>keep driving not thinking about it
>truck dies
>dafuh
>wont start
>no lights
>ok what ever i'll just call a tow truck
>calls tow truck
>we'll be 35 mins-an hour
>1 hour 35mins later he shows up
>hooks truck up and tows it home
>asking him if he knew what might of went wrong
>probably alternator
>ok
>go next day and buy new alternator
>go to replace it
>went down to -34C
>doesnt have heated shop and cant get it anywhere that does
>get everything out of the way (intake hoses, a rad hose etc)
>trying to take belt off
>forgot about tensioner
>freezing my face and ass off
>gets breaker bar to loosen tensioner
>pulling wrong way
>didnt know this at the time
>rummaged around in dads pile-o-stuff to find a pipe
>wow this thing must be really seized
>breaks it
>im getting angry because its cold and i just broke the socket of the belt tensioner
>goes on youtube
>finds vidya of my truck
>shows him going the other way
>wow im retarded
>tensioner is broken so im thinking of how im gunna get it off
>dads a pipe fitter and has lots of pipe wrenches
>grabs one
>manages to get belt off
>gets alternator out
>put new one in
>now i have to struggle with a pipe wrench to get the belt back on
>cast iron pipe wrench
>even with thick gloves I could feel the heat sinking into it
>got it to do it
>jumpstarted truck
>it runs
>relief.exe
>drove around until my original post with a broken belt tensioner
>truck never blew up

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>>17106889
webm related
I clicked end recording before I said "fuck its cold"

>>17106889
>if you don't fix your broken car it wins!

>>17106940
>no audiostreams
oh right.
i forgot about that.

>>17106951
if you fix your broken car it wins*

quote weeddude properly please.

>finish gasket or any other job
>satisfied with no leaks
>turn around to workbebch
>1 left over bolt
>no idea where it goes

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>take car to oil change place once because it was ready for one and I was just too busy to do it at the time
>next time I'm trying to change the oil the drain plug is rounded off and the oil filter is on so tight it takes me half an hour to get the fucker off because it ripped in half

>>17107027
>work at a quick lube shop
>some shitbox drives in
>all rusted up, holes in the floor
>skid plate held on by zip ties
>fart can exhaust
>clip off skid plate to find the drain plug bolt completely rounded off
>let upstairs tech know, the owner "didn't remember" where they got it done last (always code for a shitty diy job)
>try and get the drain plug back on because the guy was too cheap to spend $10 on a new one
>end up rounding it completely, tighten it up with a set of vice grips
>just for shits crank on the oil filter with a cheater bar

Pretty much an average day as a lower technician at a fast lube shop.

>>17107079
>drain plug
>$10
Found the jew

>>17107130
Canadian dollars, so that's like $2.50 USD

>>17107012
>continue driving car
>everything is fine
>add piece to bag of misc shit thats come from working on your car

I like to show passengers it, its mostly full of old bolts from stuff i've replaced and broken plastic bits. I just do it to scare people, it amuses me.

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>Europoor
>friend asks me to help change oil in his car
>it is old Ford Focus
>everything int he engine bay is so close together
>everything is covered by unneccesary plastic bullshit
>takes an hour to get the oil out
>cannot get the filter out, because it is so tightened and so hard to get
>another hour passes and we get it out
>everything is out of oil, including us
>put a new one
>he decided that we are never doing it again and rather putting it to service

I hate when the idiots make SMALL CARS and you have no fucking room in the engine bay

>>17103078
>work on friend's motorcycle
>all the fairing hardware is an assortment of various sized Hex, Phillips, and Allan heads
Can't stand mismatched hardware

>woken up early telling me my window is down in the pouring rain
>Window wont go up
>Tape a trash bag over it go back to bed
>go to work later
>FLAPAFLAPAFLAPAFLAPAFLAPAFLAPAFLAPAFLAPAFLAPAFLAPAFLAPAFLAPAFLAP
>nope.jpg
>still raining after work
>Saturn, so its ass
>door is retarded design
>window fell off track
>oh easy fix
>Cable bracket not on rain properly
>"Oh well that's why it fell off..."
>I can just push it back into pl 'SNAP!' ...ace....
> Broke bracket
>Now I have to remove it
>fucking star pattern bolts
>fucking why Saturn, why do you hate people
>Take it out, notice it hasn't been on the rail correctly the entire time ive had it
>Everything is riveted together and cant slide slider back on without removing something riveted together
>Superglue plastic rogether
>Vice grip and bend the top of the rail to slide the bracket on
>Unbend
>Reinstall
>Works great
>soaking wet and 4 hours later
Well im SO glad I got to experience that

>go to do oil change
>filter seized

>Replacing timing belt on shitbox Kia
>Follow repair manual to the letter
>Okay unbolt this unlabled thing here
>Oh god its full of antifreeze

You think the fuckin manual would tell you about that shit or at least say its a thermostat housing or oil cooler remnant or whatever the fuck it was.

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>>17107496
>tfw eventually you get so pissed you stab the shit out of it with a screwdriver and manage to use the screwdriver for torqz

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>>17104864
>mechanic standing next to you borrowed your magnet without telling you
One day I am going to murder that Romanian bastard

>>17107580
Been there a few times.

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>bolt drops into engine bay
>don't hit the ground

>>17107277
"Small" cars today are something completely else. They manage to be pigfat but still have a stupid tiny engine bay like a van and it's always completely stuffed with stupid shit and plastic covers. I drive a 90's shitbox and there's enough room in the engine to fit actual luggage. If you can't see the ground you shouldn't bother trying to fix the engine.

>>17107647
>throw away plastic covers and skid plates

and there ya go, just like it's 1987 again

>>17107660
Except it's not, because today there's power steering pumps and reservoirs, fucking ABS bullshit and extra wires and vaccuum lines for all the added pollution reduction equipment. Meanwhile in order to change the oil filter or fill the washer fluid you need to take off a wheel or some stupid shit. My car doesn't have all that shit and it still has a an engine bay about 1/3th the lenght of the entire car.

I once got the change to look inside a VW Up! engine bay and oh boy, what a fucking clusterfuck of bullshit.

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>try to find exhaust leak
>"Oh, looks like there's no doughnut gasket holding the pipe to the left exhaust manifold"
>order doughnut
>it arrived a week late, excited to finally seal up this leak
>put it on
>rev truck to test for leak
>still leaking loudly
>get frustrated
>come back hours later and start checking for where the fuck it could be
>the manifolds are like a fucking mile apart from the engine block, its a miracle anything is coming out of the exhaust pipe
>resign

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>>17107741
All of a sudden this shit seems pretty smart.

>>17107741
The UP isn't all that bad. Mostly because it's not that popular and doesn't get drived around a whole lot. It doesn't break asides from constant brake discs and drums.

But fuck me whenever a passat 4-4 two liter diesel comes in.

>I HAVE SIX 10MM SOCKETS WHY CAN'T I FIND ANY OF THEM?

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>have Mazda
>clutch sticking to floor
>get new clutch and flywheel from mechanic
>100k so still worth the money
>throwout bearing was broken
>1 week later clutch starts acting up
>bring back to shop, says its probably master cylinder
>replace master cylinder myself
>clutch worse now after bleeding
>replace clutch slave cylinder myself
>old slave visibly broken
>put everything back together
>check clutch line for leaks
>start car
>clutch still fucked
>limp car to work for a couple days and try to find the solution online
>turns out that series has a problem with clutch pedal assemblies BREAKING
>royally pissed
>tfw no recall
>limp to junkyard, slog through antifreeze soaked mud and pull pedal from a newer model
>install new pedal next day
>clutch works
>looking at old unit, spring was greased up by the previous owner who obviously halfassed a repair
>small logo on the side of the clutch pedal assembly
>FUCKING FORD
On the bright side, I leveled up in wrenching. whole ordeal cost me nearly 1500 bucks, but I got an almost complete clutch system replacement, flywheel, and 2 cv's out of it.
Anybody have any junkyard stories? My time there was an eye-opening experience

>>17103078
>after two hours of putting everything back to gether.

>Turn around and and one of the vital parts that holds everything together is still sitting there.

>>17107803
>>small logo on the side of the clutch pedal assembly
>>FUCKING FORD
Why the fuck did this make me kek so hard?

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>>17103078

>>17107803
>pulling a piece of dash trim, all I need that day
>wasp won't fucking leave me alone long enough to snatch it, and it's an old Jeep so it could be done in thirty fucking seconds
>get irritated and go to a different truck and pull that one
>it was a cleaner peice anyway
That's about it

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>>17107803
>picking up interior parts for my Civic when I had it
>Find a civic major front end damage but majority interior still inside
>Majority of interior splattered with blood stains
>mfw

>>17107994
>wanting someone elses farted on interior anyway

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>>17103078

>>17107758
This is genius. What car?

Ttrying to fix a piece of plastic trim that rattles is the fucking worst. Delicate shit. These 2014 mustang a pillar covers are the dumbest fucking things. Going to have to glue a screw on the inside, install a washer and a plate to connect two pieces...fucking a.

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>>17108104
Audi A2. Aluminium body means it's very light for its size and its drag coefficient was among the lowest ever produced at the time.

It was way ahead of its time and sold like shit.

>>17107803
Don't ever listen to a mechanic unless you know them. They have the skills to fix it yes, but they don't have the time to do forensics on every car that comes in. So they will usually just suggest a catch-all replacement.

>>17106650
New plastic grommets and a liberal amount of black silicon. I ripped out half of the back interior paneling looking for any more signs for rust and moisture.

>>17105717
>fog lights were a rare and expensive option in 1997

Nigga what?

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>>17103078
>header bolt is so close to the pipe that no socket fits on it
>no wrench fits on it either
>spend 5 minutes turning the bolt 1/8th of a turn with a tiny wrench

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>>17103078
>Have to change water pump
>"Should take me like a day at the most."
>Takes 5.

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>changing drum brakes
>drum rusted on, shoes wore a groove into them too
>drum literally coming off in chunks as I pry it off
>takes 3 hours to get one drum off
>another 2 hours fucking around with springs and such, popped the wheel cylinder open several times
>spend an entire hour just shoving the new drum on
>only done with one side but it's getting dark, go to test out car
>no handbrake, car can't stop for shit
>end up spending another hour adjusting the drum
>still haven't done the other side a month later
FUCK drum brakes

>>17108688
This guy was recommended by my go to mechanic. I trust his judgement.

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>Replacing clutch on Golf TDI
>Normally takes a little over half a day
>Get tranny out, remove pressure plate and clutch disc
>Dual mass flywheel
>Suspended mass has holes in the center that the bolts run through
>Suspended mass has shifted so the bolt heads are now covered, pic related
>End up having to cut the center out of the flywheel to get to the bolts
>Takes way longer than it needs to
>Metal flakes in my hair and all over my shirt
>Face itches from metal flakes
>Can't scratch face because everything is metal flakes
>Finish job with itchy face
>Look at clock
>It took 7 hours

Probably the only job that made me genuinely angry.

>>17109517
>Five days to replace a fucking water pump
How? What car? Were you only using a flathead screwdriver and a crescent wrench?

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>>17107496
>>17107580
Just get these and never have this problem again.

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>>17103078

Heh, this'll be easy.

>Have to cut your fuel line and re flare a new one while shit and PB Blaster drip in your eyes.

>>17107580
If the screwdriver trick works it wasn't stuck, you're just a pussy.

When you tear the filter apart with the screwdriver and still can't get that fucker unthreaded, then you have a reason to complain.

>>17107803
Had a similar problem on my ford fusion. A new oem clutch pedal was only 110$ and took about 1hr to replace.

>>17107027
Did this but they didn't torque the plug and it came of

>Orlando VW dealer

>buy car with heavy front end damage
>pull the engine so i can send it to the frame repair shop
>got the frame fixed, after repainting it im putting the engine back in.
>last thing to bolt on is the power steering pump
> fill everything up with liquids, time for a test drive
>power steering is completely dead
>turn left and right full lock, drove around the block trying to bleed the system
>powersteering still ded
>take out the pump thinking that it was dead and i needed a new one
>in the pump oil intake there was a piece of cloth that i had jammed in there previously to prevent dust from getting in while the pump was in storage.
>both relieved that i don't need a new pump and fucking mad at myself for forgetting to remove that.
>bolt it back on, works fine.
About 2 hours wasted.

>change the oil and filter
>30 minutes max
>2 minutes to jack up the car
>45 minutes to get the sump plug unscrewed because hurr durr alfa romeo uses giant hex head that has been rounded out by 10 years of over-zealous mechanics
>45 minutes to go to the shop and buy a bolt-head replacement
>15 minutes to drain the oil
>5 minutes to change filter
>2 minutes to refill
>2 minutes to put car back on ground

It was nerve-wracking trying to undo that bolt without rounding it out even worse and potentially trapping myself into having to drill the fucking thing out. Worse still because the fucking thing was very nearly flush mount, it was only about 2mm proud and that isn't a lot of meat for vice grips to hang on to. Got it in the end with the vice grips, a hammer, and some creative lever extensions.

>when it takes you a solid 30 minutes to fit your coil+shock correctly
why is life hard

>>17107647
that's what I love about 90's shitboxes, you can reach absolutely everything by hand. water pump/ alternator fucked? just grab it, it's right there. oil filter? sticks out of the engine like a stiff willy, a hippo could unscrew it.

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Hold me.

>Just going to change these front shocks.
>Should only take an hour considering how easy the back ones where!
>Later the next day and 6 rust stripped clips later...

>>17107803
>Having anything but a mechanical clutch

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>Changing oil on bike
>pull farings and shit off to access
>drop oil and replace filter
>sump plug is tight enough to put fluid in but needs nipping up
>put oil in
>just need to tighten it up and re-assemble bodywork
>go to grab something
>tell mate who's helping to tighten plug
>he attempts to use a 1/2 inch socket wrench
>mfw spanner would've done fine
>hear loud crack
>"crush washer is seated" he says
>mfw i know that wasn't the crush washer
>mfw oil starts dripping on the ground
>mfw when Sunday and shop isn't open

Last time I let anyone "help"

>>17107813

>Change head gasket
>End up with 5 bolts left over
>Found homes for 2 of them
>Kept the other 3 on hand just in case
>It's been 4 years now and I have done tons of other work on the engine
>Where the fuck did these go?

>>17111426

Hydraulic clutches are fine. Maintain fluid replacement and the seals will last much longer.

Complaining about hydraulic clutches is like complaining that your brakes are hydraulic

>>17111463
I guess abs and traction control are fine too.

>>17111718
traction control is poo in winter

>>17106649
>bleed brakes
>still feel spongy as all hell
>turns out most of the fluid drained out and air got into the ABS module
Reason number three why I hate ABS. This happened on my Subaru once, the only fix was a dealer plugging in their factory scan tool to run a "bleed procedure" which works the solenoids in the module to bleed out air.

>>17110404
>only 110$
>only
>for a simple mechanical item that should easily out-live the car
planned obsolescence is getting bad these days

>>17111390
I'm so sorry anon.

>>17103078
Okay, all I need to do is change the O2 sensor on the downpipe

>no access unless you have a lift or take apart the entire exhaust side of the engine
>don't have correct size wrench
>get 02 tool from autozone
>build long breaker bar tool that can only move 1 click at a time
>what feels like hours of clicking later it comes out
>okay time to screw in the new one, but its not going in
>take a look at the old o2 sensor
>the fucking threads are totally missing, all I did was shear off the threads
>back to autozone for a tap
>three clicks forward one click back, feels like hours
>finally fucking done and new o2 sensor screws right in

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>>17107012

>>17111823
I know that feeling.

>Putting on new coilovers
>Trying to work the bottom perch into the shock seat
>Pull control arm down
>Almossstt
>CV joint pulls apart
>Spend 3 hours trying to fit it back in
>No dice
>End up having to leave car for a week while I wait for new axles since old ones had ancient torn boots anyway

>>17111390
what am I looking at there

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>>17109603
yes. i love drum brakes.

>>17110353
how did you end up doing that?

>>17107620
This.
If something falls in an engine bay, chances are you are never gonna see it again.

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>>17111964
i found so many bolts in my engine bay

>>17111982
Brings back Scirocco memories. My 1981 is still running with another owner and had 400k miles at least when I sold it.

If your Bosch injection ever dies you can use an Omni intake manifold (Dodge used VW engines on many Omnis) a spacer (I made mine) and a rebuilt Pinto or Vega "Holley-Weber" carb (simpler then the Omni units) to replace it. Not much work involved. I drove that setup from 1995 to 2004.

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>>17104864
>Open oil pan
>plug falls into catch pan with oil
Or alternatively
>Wrench falls into full pan

>>17109455
For this particular car, yes.

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>>17111992
no i hate that car. last time i drove it a pulley committed suicide

>>17111324
That's why they're the ultimate beginner cars too. They're not too acient and thoroughly rusted like 80's cars but still dead simple. I wonder how kids in the far future will have to face fixing their own shit when everything's sealed or accesible with special tools only.

>>17111463
This. Most tractors have hydraulic clutch cylinders, and as long as you change the fluid regularly, you can get thousands of work hours without replacing the master cylinder.
And thank god they are hydraulic; maneuvering a mechanical one at almost sixty years old ain't no piece of cake.

>>17112037
I wonder about that too. In the future working on your own car will be the equalivant of hacking.

>>17112048
>Tractors are cars

>>17112067
This statement is true in the legal respect also. It's nearly here already. Software companies control much of the economy now, and all software "ownership" is just license agreements. You never own any of it, you merely pay a one-time fee to be able to use it. Computers, phones, the software in your car. Copyright law makes breaking the license agreement illegal, and breaking the license agreement can be almost any modification not authorized by the original developer/manufacturer, because they won't authorize anything they don't sell themselves or else they'll lose shekels.

The more components of cars that become computerized, the further down this cyberpunk rabbit hole we fall. Fly-by-wire steering and brakes. Magnetically controlled suspension. Stupid infotainment and climate control systems. ALL mods will eventually exist in a legal grey area and the only thing preventing it from getting worse is how arbitrarily greedy your car's manufacturer is feeling on any given day.

>>17112504
And it's important to note this applies to repairs with aftermarket equivalent parts, not just aftermarket performance. Repairing shit in your driveway with third-party parts could be illegal soon. Professional mechanics will have to sign agreements to only use original manufacturer parts. The aftermarket will still exist as long as they post disclaimers that using their products will be illegal, but inspections (in states that have them) would become a shitstorm.

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>tfw you go to pick-a-part and you dont need any tools for the part you need
>feelsgoodman.jpg

Got a pretty sweet badge for my truck, too, that I pried off with a seatbelt buckle I found on the ground.

>>17108117
Looks like a bloated TT

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>find source of oil leak at a connection with an O ring
>oh okay, just gotta replace the old ring
>replace it
>still leaks from the same spot

>>17111946
Looks like a completely rust fucked and rounded bolt

>>17111949
>front drums
What car is that?

>tfw you fuck up your front wheel bearings cause front drums require bearing removal...and THEN fuck up the entire assembly cause didn't put enough grease.
>Oh well, an excuse to put disc brakes on!

>>17112526
It's illegal for companies to require use of their parts, they have to approve some aftermarket companies or the government will fine them. Makes your little conspiracy theory a little far fetched, eh?

>>17112067
>>17112504
Isn't one tractor company already trying to do that?

>>17112613
I don't think there is any aftermarket breather hoses for a Mk4 Jetta. At least that's what my dad (vw mechanic) said

>>17112621
John Deere

>>17112613
Software built into the part negates that. Apple can't prevent other companies from selling plastic iphone cases or charging cords, but they are the only ones selling the motherboards. As more and more parts become computerized to the point they contain a microchip, they will legally only be sold by the original manufacturer.

>>17112625
But there is a company approved to make them. Said company doesn't think making them would be profitable, so they don't.

>>17112653
Well that's retarded

>>17112647
Apple motherboards are made by Foxconn, they're already aftermarket, and you can buy them direct from the manufacturer.

>>17112548
Tfw shadman

>>17112713
Rrrrrrrrr

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>>17104895
>be wiring circuit
>disconnect battery ground
>do work
>reconnect battery ground
>start car
>re re re re re re re re re re VROOOOM
>*dies*
>WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO
>start car again
>re re re VROOOOM
>works fine
>drive around block to be safe

>>17109603
Whoever invented drumbreaks is an enemy of humanity.

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>>17111964
It could be worse

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>>17110343
One of these things is even better, especially if there's no space around the filter for the handle of the one you posted. If the head of your wrench pivots you don't need much space.

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>>17111304
just weld a ratchet extension on the top m8, easy as

> pic related

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>lol got a nice deal on rear shocks/quick struts for the front for my shitty mazda 3
>shouldn't be too hard, the chrisfx video looked fairly easy, undo a few clips and 2 bolts not including the ones on the strut tower
>soak everything in some nice PB
>get my breaker bar, load up the 17mm and proceed to try to break the bolt crimping the strut to the knuckle
>snap

Spent an entire day, try to use extractors. Then i had to take apart the whole front passenger right. Take the knuckle off with the strut stuck in it and drill the bolt out for fucking hours. Ended up just tapping in new threads, bought an new bolt from the dealership and put it back together. Have yet to even touch the driver side quick strut or the rear shocks. Fuck rusty cars. Next time i am torching the shit out of everything, using an impact and letting it soak in PB for a day.

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>Waiting all week to replace my window motor
>Unbolt the motor from the regulator
>Lose my grip, and the pulley unwinds
>Get it back together, and the cables are getting caught on something
>Random storm rolls in
>Getting soaked
>Have to rush to put everything back together in a rush

These are the joys of having no garage

>>17116398
Apartment life

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>proceeds on scratch all 4 velgs with butler

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>>17103078
>put key in
>turn
>it starts


RRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ANOTHER DAY ON THE DAILY GRINDIDIDNTWATNTOGOTOWORKFUKU

>>17103078
>go to change headlight
>-10, driveway is slush
>dark out
>use phone as light
>try to remove old headlight
>last idiot didn't close the latch right
>go get pliers to pull it open
>take headlight cover off, set on engine cover
>replace headlight
>try to grab cover
>bump it off
>thunk, thunk, thunk, but it doesn't hit the ground
>crawl down in slush
>reach into splash guard
>feel around and find the cover
>try to place it
>drop it again
>this time the foglight housing
>have to youtube a tutorial for getting into that

>hour and a half to change a fucking headlight

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>pull spark plugs out
>covered in oil

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>do maintenance on bike
>get bash plate off
>break off one of the mounts
>order a new one at the dealer (cheapest place most of the time and a general good time)
>park bike next to dealer
>only brought adjustable spanners, WD-40, cloths and a ratchet with socket 10
>lie next to bike for 30 minutes trying to get it off, soaked with WD-40
>it's not moving
>turn spanner the other way round to get a better angle
>see the mount is turning with it
>it can be actually turned by hand after 16 years
>had been turning it the wrong way round all the time

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>>17104864

>>17104864
>drop ratchet while working on rear of engine bay
>lands on top of the transmission

there is not a single travesty worse ever to befall man

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>>17112874
>be me
>wiring in lights
>forgot to unhook battery because im retarded
>SPARKSEVERYWHERE.PNG
>break 3/4 of my fuses
>fuck it i'll just replace all of them
>i didnt have a fuse puller
>one fuse broke with blade still in
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>pull blade out
>use enough force to punch self in face with plyers
>MRW

>>17105023
>it's so strong I have to drill 4 times with smaller drills to make one 4mm hole
>break a lot of drills
I think your bits are just dull. Did you try sharpening them?

>>17116634
>header nut falls behind A/C compressor mount

Never been so fucking mad in my entire life. I had to take off PS/AC belts, intake tubing, radiator, radiator tubes, relocate AC hoses and PS hoses then 11 more fucking bolts JUST FOR A NUT. ONE NUT. FUCK.

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Mfw cel randomly goes off

>>17113581
What part was this fossil found in?

>>17115038
Not that guy but never thought about that. Thanks man. Ill do that if I ever run in to that sort of trouble.

>>17116246
I did mine and broke all but one clip. Had to cut the heads off each bolt with a dremel. Only have a dremel because I got it for the previous christmas. Fucking thing has proven its weight in gold since.

>Front shocks
>Take first bolt out
>No problem
>ohh this is going to be easy
>Second bolt going well
>Turning turning, this is taking forever
>bolts not moving, clip is fucked
>Cut bolt off
>Get new clip in.
>Turning turning turning
>This is fucking tight
>Turning tighter and tighter
>SNAP
>Twisted the head right off the bolt
>threads were wrong
>Buy new bolts and clips
>Finally finished one side
>Go to home depot and buy cutting discs for dremel and a set of new clips and bolts for the other side, since I get the feeling ill need them.
>Break all the clips and cut them of before installing the new shocks

On the plus side. The clips I got from home depot were nice. They are actual nuts attached to clips, not just stamped steel.

>>17116377
I see people doing garage work at the car wash frequently.

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Half the tribulations in this thread could be avoided.

https://www.amazon.com/SE-8036TM-NEW-Telescoping-Magnetic-Capacity/dp/B000RB3XBA/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1493546638&sr=8-1&keywords=magnet+on+a+stick

>hanging out while someone is working on a car
>when they're not looking add random nuts/bolts to their pile of parts

>>17103078
>When you discover the previous owner used shitty hardware store bolts as fasteners

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>>17116950

>>17112504
Software license agreements very rarely hold up in court.

>>17112647
Apple charging cords do contain a chip. It made it harder to make good aftermarket cords but they do exist now.

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>>17116950
What kind of loathsome animal would do such a fucking thing?

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>>17104864
>drop tool
>it falls through the engine bay and lands on the floor

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what is wrong with you people?

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>do not go gentle into that good night
>rage...rage...
>against the dying of the light

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>take off aftermaket fog lights.
>I used pliers, wrenches, sockets, ect
>Close hood to go for a test drive
>Go around corner kinda hard
>Hear tools clanging around under hood
>pull off to side of the road
>open hood
>only find two sets of pliers
>No tools on the road

I learned my lesson to always check for tools when you are done.

>>17117880
What if it's a non-magnetic piece

>>17116875
A similar trick that got me out of trouble with a seized and rounded brake bleed nipple is to weld a nut onto the nipple. The heat also helps unstick the threads.

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>>17117965

>>17110271
It took me about two weeks to replace mine because I found out I needed two gaskets and the pump I bought only had one

>>17111882
Shit, that reminds me:
>Have to replace cat on Volvo 960
>Get old cat out, no big deal
>New cat and O2 sensors show up
>Slap new cat on, go to screw sensors in
>Front sensor refuses to start
>Take cat back out
>Front sensor bung has been crossthreaded
>On a brand new cat
>This somehow passed QC
>Grab O2S tap and fix threads
>Everything's fine

>>17118752
Let me guess, old Ford engine of some kind?

>>17116868
Looks like the top of a piston to me.

>>17107496
>swap motor in car
>ends up taking three days, thought I had all tools and parts, but there were little annoying differences in sensors and cooling system, etc
>get everything situated and set up, go to take off old filter, engine had already been drained
>fucking japanese cunts torqued this filter to hell and back
>spend a solid hour with HUGE gator pliers crushing the filter
>finally get it to spin, didnt want to resort to screwdriver

>>17116666
Just use a different nut, fucktard.

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>want to make greentext story about car
>don't have a car
>not even a driver licence
>can't even understand some words itt

>change oil for the first time
>forget to put drain cap back on

>>17107012
every fucking time. I've got a box full of nuts and bolts of both of my vehicles. Everytime I end up starting a long or extensive job on them I'll end up adding a part or three to the box, but both vehicles still run great.

>Changing the heater core in my oldass truck
>Heater core is behind plastic cover in cab, pretty easy right?
>Take off plastic cab, fucker cracks halfway through
>ANTIFREEZE EVERYWHERE
>Guess I'm not gonna live to be 60
>Unscrew clip that holds up HC
>Held on by a tiny piece of plastic, of course it breaks
>Okay 2 hose clamps and I'm good
>Both of them rusted to shit
>Pair of adjustable vicegrips
>Pretty easy right?
>Clips break
>Fug
>Hoses are like fused to the metal on the heater core
>Can't get them off
>Fuck it I'll cut them
>Hoses JUST too short to reach now

>Guys on the forums saying they could bang it out in like an hour

>>17119864
3 days on a swap. I would call that fast

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>oil pan is leaking in 94 celica gt
>drain oil
>unbolt header
>flywheel cover hides oil pan bolts
>subframe needs to be unbolted to remove flywheel cover
>motor mounts need to be unbolted to remove subframe
>finally get everything unbolted and remove pan
>pure silicone gasket
>spend 30 minutes scrapping it all
>new gasket, put everything back together
>start car up
>oil leak was actually coming from oil pump and dripping down the oil pan

>Truck acting weird
>"Maybe it just needs antifreeze"
>Get home, park truck.
>I'm not gonna be like one of those idiots who open the radiator cap as soon as the cars turns off.
>Open hood, turn radiator cap left
>Oh wait....
>PFFFTTTT hot water gets all over me, steam rushes out, cap goes flying inside
>Spend 10 minutes looking for cap in darkness, put it back on, go inside house, think about life choices

>>17121634
>have a leak
>shit dripping everywhere
>not wiping everything down and turning the engine on again to find the true source
Scientific method, faggot.

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>>17121900
did that, genius
from the way it leaks, it really looks like its coming from the pan

>>17121882
What kind of ancient relic are you driving where you have to add coolant through the radiator?

>>17121634
>90's Toyota
Eh, just as well. Every seal on that thing should be like obsidian now. Even in the 90's you'd end up doing literally every seal and gasket to get them to quit leaving puddles everywhere and time hasn't helped any.

>>17116660

Not me
>Coworker blows transmission on F150
>gets a used low mileage replacement
>Finds a shop to swap it
>Didn't unhook battery
>water in P/N switch
>truck now dead
>Rips out remote starter
>replaces ECU
>Replaces wiring harness
Nothing
>tows to a ford dealer
>$800 gauge cluster replacement

The whole job was only going to cost $1000 ends up being $3600

>>17121181

Agreed, it usually takes me a weekend by myself.

My record is 8 hours

>first time doing brakes
>pistons are turn&compress type
>spend 2 hours trying to compress them with no success
>finally ask my roommate to pick up a piston compressor tool
>takes 20 minutes once I have it

>>17117903
Jesus, did someone forget to lube those?

>>17111304
I always order a decent quality sump bolt when I order my filters, in preparation for the next oil change. It's a habit you should get in to, m8

>not putting anti-seize on your oil filter threads
heh

>leaking bottle of red loctite in toolbox
>adjustable wrench no longer adjustable

>>17110343
>Implying the filter isn't too small

>>17112004
Not owning a pan with bolt catching screen

>>17116956
>>17117434
>not messing with your friends

>tfw you kind of want something to break on your car so you can buy tools and learn how to wrench

>>17122805
Whats with the people who are clamping their oil filters down till the threads want to strip? I hand tighten all my filters and never had an oil leak. Whats with the people using an impact wrench to put their plug back in? Whats wrong with these people?

>>17123408
>tfw when you love your used vehicle for more than it being the prefect driving experience but also because it breaks every now or there preventative maintenance to be done!

New toys and having a good reason to get your hands under her skirt.

>>17123409
>people using an impact wrench to put their plug back in
WHAT THE FUCK

>>17123417
Got to be. How else are they rounding off that nutt. Its not exactly small. Takes some effort and extreme carelessness.

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>>17107012
>go to do something to car
>know this is going to happen
>"okay im not gonna let this happen again!"
>meticulously make sure I know where each bolt, nut and screw goes
>putting everything back, remember every thing I've removed
>finish job, everything is secure, no wobbles or leaks or gaps
>still end up with an extra something

I don't even know how anymore.

>>17122684
They don't require lube. Its an idler pulley who's bearing finally gave up.

>>17123485
>a bearing that does need lube
>?????

Engineered failure?

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>Building engine
>Have a reco'd bottom end and just got the head back from the shop
>Time to put it together with some ARP head studs
>I've threaded the studs into the block, laid the head down on top
>Start torquing the bolts in order with multiple passes
>On to the seventh bolt, need to go to 70ft/lbs
>Suddenly
>BANG
>Head stud and bolt are now loose as shit and won't torque down
>Stud had pulled all the threads out of the engine block

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>>17116660
>use enough force to punch self in face with pliers

Every fucking time. Especially if its with a wrench in a really really tight spot and you end up decking yourself in the nose

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>>17124501
Why does literally everyone do this?
>Bolt in a hard to reach place
>Fuck it, pliers will work
>Begin taking it off
>Slips, rip top of my hand open on car
>Fuck

>Mother is trying to remove a nail from wall
>Grabs pliers funky, but is really trying to pull nail out
>Finally comes out
>Hits self in face
>Falls off ladder (Nail was high up for picture)
>Catch her as she falls
>Turns out, she hit her cornea with her hand
>Her nails completely tear her cornea
>Somehow tears it perfectly, so that it will heal on its own
>Have to pull every nail since

I will never trust pliers for anything.

>>17124526
>Her nails completely tear her cornea
>Somehow tears it perfectly, so that it will heal on its own
this sounds horrible

>>17105111
Where it goes is a pretty normal spot, but you have almost 0 access to the bolts

>>17124545
It ended up healing great, just like the doctor said, but she was half blind for like a month when it happened. fuck pliers, fuck nails, fuck anything above the waist as far removing things.

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>>17103078
>>17104864
>>17104895
>putting led into headlight
>edition of your car is just so special that they dont fit

>>17124526
>>17124553
>nails
Who do women wear these? They are fucking ugly and dysfunctional.

>>17124646
you realize older women like their nails to look nice right?
it not like you need some long ass nigger nails to be able to hurt yourself with them

good shit go౦ԁ sHit
thats
some good

shit right

there


right
there

if i do ƽaү so my self
i say so
thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷM
HO0OଠOOOOOOଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ
Good shitsauce me the FUCK up
cheesy shit cheesy sHit
thats
some cheesy

shit right

th
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right
there

if i do ƽaү so my self
i say so
thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷM
HO0OଠOOOOOOଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ
Cheesy shit
euphoric logic !euphoric loGic
thats
some euphoric

logic right

there


Carl
Sagan

if i do ƽaү so gentlemen
i say so
thats euPhoric logic right there Richard
Dawkins
(chorus: socrates died for this shit) mMMMMᎷM
HO0OଠOOOOOOଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ
euphoric logic slam me the FUCK uP
john cena JOhN cEna
john
cena john

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cena


john
cena

u can't see me if I do ƽaү so my self
i say so
thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷM
HO0OଠOOOOOOଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ
John ceNa POTENTIALLY sign me the FUCK up

>>17124661
But they dont look nice. They look stupid and dirty. Just think about all the mold and bacteria that get sin there. disgusting.

>>17121136
>other people can do it with ought being retarded
You idiot, of course there is antifreeze in the loop, and the rusted clamps get replaced by new cheam worm gear ones, and WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU CUT THE HOSE? Get a screw driver or something under the hose and separate the hose from the metal.
>2/10 you suck at wrenching

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>had landyacht
>it wasn't inspectable anymore so I bought a smaller car
>want to make a trip to the dump
>it's more cost-effective to make one large trip with EVERYTHING at once for a flat fee, instead of using the normalfag station that charges per bag
>stressing about how I'm gonna fit all this trash in my new tiny hatchback
>oh wait my old car still works, it's just illegal to drive
>charge up the battery
>drive to the dump and back, feels like absolute shit with no power
>battery light comes on on my way back
>electrics all die literally 400 feet from my house
>coast up the hill and run out of momentum at the end of my yard
>take out the battery and charge it again
>put it back in and limp the car to my driveway
>dies again almost immediately

Really glad I didn't have to waste a tow on that piece of shit. I'd sooner leave it on the side of the road and let it get impounded, but I was hoping to sell it to a demo derby redneck this spring.

>>17125156
>my old car still works
>electrics all die
You have an interesting interpretation of "working"

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>>17103078

>cel
>rear o2 sensor
>replace o2 sensor
>two days later
>cel
>rear o2 sensor
>drop cat to inspect it
>cat clogged
>sheer every bolt on the cat getting it out
>bolts are splined and pressed into the flanges
>torch bolts
>reinstall gutted cat
>exhaust leaks
>order new exhaust rings
>vatozone orders the wrong parts
>have the order correct parts
>wait a week
>reinstall gutted cat
>no more leaks
>permanent cel

>>17125180
It's pretty obvious the battery was just at the end of its lifespan. Here's the rest of the problems that led to me not using it anymore.
>rear air suspension leaks
>rust holes in frame
>short circuit in security system/locks/interior lights, removed fuse and ignored
>severe rust on fuel and brake lines, threatening to blow any minute
>a couple brake calipers stick so they go through pads faster

The drivetrain was perfectly functional when I parked it, it was everything else that was fucked.

>>17125039
If they're that corroded you really should just replace the hose, so cutting would be fine.

>>17121181
Its was kinda fast. But it was a stock replacement motor done in a shop with a lift after hours.
I was working on it from 6pm-midnight for three nights in a row.
I guess that counts as fast. Especially for my first swap ever.

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>>17104864
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4wKPTWXD2Z0

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>>17104895
Similar story but with my computer.
>Computer shits the bed and bluescreens upon startup
>Spend two days trying to unfuck it back to health
>Reinstalling windows and all the usual tricks don't work
>Boot into gahnoo linnuoox to back up my files
>Reformat and restore from year old backup
>STILL WON'T BOOT
>Look at backup drive
>Folders copied and NOTHING ELSE
>One whole year of data down the drain
>Restore from backup again
>Same situation
>Reinstall wangblows
>bluescreen
>Ready to die inside
>Pop the CMOS battery after disassembling and reassembling the entire thing to no avail
>Boots
>Two days of frustration and a year of data for a CMOS battery

I cannot feel with you fellas.

Never had a bolt/screw shear on my 27 year old jap shitbox

Actually feels good mang

>>17124725
This

>>17126576
What did you do to backup the files? The copy utility is shit on command line, rsync is more involved but never fails.
>some piece of shit thought it was a good idea to have the kernel simulate disk writes
>almost lost all my backups because I didn't manually type "sync"

>>17122603
The fucking rear brakes in my 07 s40 Volvo are like that. Had no idea until I called my buddy who told me of this. I was literally trying to compress the piston for a solid hour. The fronts are compress, why not the rear? Ended up using a pair of vice grips and SLOWLY AND PAINFULLY turning the piston. Fucking volvo.

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>>17106663
>you find more broken shit while working

Sometimes I wish I could tell my car to save the bad news for later. I can only handle so many unwarranted surprises at once.

>new bike
>check under seat storage
>3 fresh doobies the old owner had forgotten about in a zippy bag
noice la

>>17128296
Which you immediately turned in to the police because you are not a degenerate.

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>nan runs car without oil
>engine sounds like one of the big end bearings shit itself
>anon can it be fixed?
>yeah if you have a couple grand for parts and tools because i dont have an engine crane or anything
>my friend said you can buy this special oil to fix it and its 20 dollars
>he's wrong
>stop being so negative!!

>see bolt fall
>looking for it
>suddenly find it in completely unrelated place

> Subaru Outback
> check engine light for knock sensor malfunction
> takes a half hour to find it
> underneath the intake
> can barely see it
> two extensions and universal joints
> pop the bolt holding it in
> aluminum block
> threads instantly ruined
> takes hours to take the ignition, intake, vacuum tubes off
> helicoil
> hours to reinstall everything
> start car
> rough idle

I've never hated working on a car so much, and I even have a tenth generation F150 with the 5.4.

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>>17129442
Or did you find a different bolt that you lost in ages past?

>>17121882
had a friend who did this with a 1974 Charger, he was such an idiot. Burned his entire left arm, the skin was literally hanging off when I took him to the hospital.

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>>17129477
>have car with plastic rocker cover
>usually put my hand on it when i want to lean over the engine
>later get car with aluminium cover
>put hand on it
>mfw

>>17129463
Where the flipping fuck did you expect a knock sensor to be? That's where they are on literally every car.

>WHERE IS THIS FUCKING SHIT REEEEE
>REEEE WHY IS IT THERE REEEEE

Literally you, about something that is standard operating procedure. There is no other place that they can go.

>>17129581
Why are you so passionate about this? Did your father waste his life looking for the knock sensor, only to die of shame and humiliation?

>need to replace one of the control arms on an 95 eagle talon
>bolt goes through the subframe into the actual unibody
>immediately snaps off
>can't even weld a bit of metal to put some vicegrps on it
>can't even heat up the metal around it because its under the subframe and wouldn't get enough heat to expand it
>end up selling the car for parts

More sad that ragey i suppose

>>17107994
you could have had that combination most haunted/metal as fuck honda of all time

>>17107798
>bring a small toolbox of essentials to bail out a noncar friend and fix some small things at his house
>reach for my 10mm snap on ratcheting wrench
>can't find it
>panic because I know i grabbed all of them and that wrench along probably costs $60 since the whole set of 10-19 was like $450
>find it stuck to the bottom of my magnetic snap on socket holder a few days later