What are you guys packing in case of a random cager attack?

>>995681
A few gels and a patch kit.

>>995681
The eager expectation of death. Cycling is the nihilists perfect mode of transportation.

>>995681
I used to think my seat would be a good weapon, but now it's bolted.

Why white,see-through bibs showing my white viscuos ass

Cager will die of disgust!

A pack of other rides, all in eye bleachingly bright spandex.

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>>995681
SP2022 in my fanny pack.

>>995681
There is not a lot that will save you from being deliberately run over besides common sense, well trained gut feeling and quick reflexes.

Besides that, helmet, thicker cycling gloves and heavy duty lock chain will do it.

>>995681
/n/ and /k/
who'd'a thunk it

>>995681
>random cager attack
Grow up

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>>995684

>>995808
I think it's responsible and grown up to be prepared for raging cager attacks. Also, you never know when someone wants to make you into a victim.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5DgIr_1Wro

It must suck living in a country where everybody is trying to kill you, including your own police force.

Good luck surviving your post election riots. Maybe you could loot that new bike you've been dreaming about!

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>>995681
>What are you guys packing in case of a random cager attack?
A D lock works great against anyone armed with nothing better. Gun control means that all road-rage is mêlée only here. I prefer it that way.

I should practice D lock vs Clublock drills.

Most of the time, the way cagers try to kill me is by a sudden horn blast or passenger shouting in my ear as they pass me, trying to startle me into a fall.

I always did like the idea of picking up my bike by the top bar and using it as a batleth.

>>995825
Rioting and looting doesn't happen in white neighborhoods so there won't be a chance to get the new bikes. White people arm themselves so all of the darkies stay in their own communities when tearing things up.

Pros: segregation works
Cons: no 10k bike ;~;

My enormous ego

Righteous indignation.

>cagers
https://youtu.be/yet9P_DxJIY

>>995822
I wonder what it's like to live every moment of your life in total and utter pants-wetting fear & constant paranoia, like the cyclists of /n/? It must be exhausting.

>>995681
what kind of third world country do you live in where you need to arm yourself to go outside?

What is a cager?

>>995948
An imaginary bogeyman that cyclists use to excuse themselves from their actions.

>>995953
*some cyclists

see also: foamers who have a steel bike rusting away in their dad's yard.

>>995953
What wonderful fantasy land do you live in where motorists are all civil and reasonable?

>>995974
What scary nightmare world do you live in where motorists are actively hunting down and killing cyclists?

>>995978
Real life

>>995948
See what I mean? >>995981 is so deeply paranoid delusional that he genuinely believes that other people are actively hunting him down and attempting to kill him.

When you see someone who unironically uses the word cager now you know; pity them, and hope they're receiving the proper mental health care that they need.

>>995983
Shut up cager and stop trying to kill me

>>995983
But anon, they do. I know of four instances in just my town. Some of them on camera. One on a road closed to motor traffic and only open to bikes - a ban that cagers couldn't be bothered to respect and one asshole in a SUV decided to run down a cyclists riding "in the middle of the road". When they placed guards to ward the cagers off said stretch of road they had to pull the guards off after a few days due to serious threats made by motorists. They now have physical barriers.
One ran down a functionary during a bike parade because he felt all the cyclists were "a danger". Pic related.
A fine gentleman was recently sentenced for running down a girl on a bike that happened to be queueing in front of him, both waiting for a green light. She had dreadlocks and 'looked like an activist' according to the cager.
A guy I've briefly met in cycling circles was ran off the road by a road-raging bus driver(!) that couldn't accept the way that bike boxes work.
And I have personaly been swerved into, shouted at and even assaulted for daring to bike in the bike lanes, using bike boxes or biking in the bus lanes (obligated by law if they're to the right in my direction of travel).

You live in la-la-land my friend. Do you have ponies there?

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>>995992
>forgot pic

>>995993
>rich cunts

not even once

>>995685
This

>>995992
You live in Iraq?

>>995937
>Sharrow
lmao the cager was a dick but the cyclist was also being a douche.

>>995955
Right only some cyclists. I'm not like all those other violent thug cyclists, I am unbiased and I completely agree with you that we are infact the problem here.

Cyclist lives matter?
Ha, ALL lives matter.

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>>996003
In the greatest land of tolerance, understanding and universal love (except for cyclists).

>>995948
Driver of an automobile, used as a derogative.

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>>995948

This >>996013

The terminology comes from the fact that a car is a cage on wheels.

>>995941
That's propaganda for people who have never owned a firearm. You think about your CC about as much as you think about your ears after the 2nd week.

A big stainless steel stick covered with old tube rubber to improve handgrip, mounted similar as a pump. Not for cagers at all but for dogs and drunk plp.

>>996055
>he does not have a titanium stick with a celeste green latex tube from vittoria mounted magnetically

>>996035
>a wild terrorist appears
>forget that you have a cc

>>996063
Pretty much. It takes a second to remember that you're not completely fucked.

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>>995937
>That last sharrow at the end

>>996073
what makes me kek the most is how the old dude sounds like he's on the verge of tears the entire time

>>995937
the faggot apologized: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=virjGCSzkUk

>>995937
ol0l cyclist got btfo honestly. luckily my face and musculature strikes fear into people like that and whenever I confront people it doesn't take much to get them nervous. The trick seems to be to use few words, use deep voice but don't yell and use decisive/confident/strong body language and make direct sustained eye contact. If I tell them what they did (i.e accidental close passing/cutting off) and they get defensive or make excuses I just say "No."

Chain with a padlock on the end.

>>995948

Imagine an angry monkey locked in a cage watching his wife's holes being wrecked by nigger monkeys, while she screams out that her husband could never fuck her this could because he's an impotent faggot pussy.

Now imagine that this monkey has worked his whole life and wasted all that money to buy that cage and pay for his wife, and also gets slapped in the head by police monkeys all the time. And on top of that pays a tax to terrorist monkeys who hate him.

The whole time he's doing this, he's surrounded by a thousand other screaming caged monkeys all flinging shit and farting up the air.

Then he sees a monkey swinging through the trees and realizes his mistake.

Imagine all of this, but 100 times worse, and you are beginning to understand the cager.

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Would you gunbike? :3c

>>996133

only if the gun was pointing backwards
gottagofast

>>996133

So when the cager pulls up next to you and rages out their window, you just push the trigger button and the gun shoots out the end of the handlebar and neutralized the cager threat.

How does this make you feel?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FEKhgBye5K0

>>996165
>all the comments in support of the bicyclist, on youtube of all places
>wtf?
>cuz the cager is a JOO

lol

>>996055
>he doesn't have a quick-release stem face plate to remove his flat bars and use it as a bat
flat bar road bat

>>995681
A kind word and a "have a nice day"? The only reason I have any trouble in this country is because of the absurdly toxic "us versus them" mentality. "Share the road" doesn't actually mean share the road, it means "gun down all cagers on sight, and salt their fields". Utterly absurd.

A quick wit and a sense of humour.

My infectious smile helps too.

>>996176

G I N G I V I T U S
I
N
G
I
V
I
T
U
S

Civil-War-era cavalry sabre

>>996170

Nice attempt at deflection jew. I've seen plenty of behaviour like this from jews, the guy's a cliche. Show me whites acting so smarmy.

>be driving recumbent on recumbent on road where the speed limit is 30 kmh.
>go 40
>cager behind me is honking like crazy and telling me to get on the bike path
What is wrong with cagers?
Even when I go clearly above the speed limit it isn't enough for them.

People also tend to speed up once they see me closing in on them.

>>996191

>rolling in traffic I could easily outpace
>roll in the lane with the cages because it's not safe to squeeze on the inside at that speed
>fag in a land raper behind me honks me to get out of the road
>move across so he thinks I let him in
>undertake the car in front of me
>i'm still in front xD

I do what I can to psychologically fuck with cagers. I've driven cars in heavy traffic for work before so have a sound awareness of the flow of traffic and how to predict it. Cagers don't, which is why they always crash.

>>995830
>Gun control means that all road-rage is mêlée only here.
Improvised weapons are most commonly used in cases of a sudden rage attacks and what better to than a two-tonne cannonball that can accelerate to 100 km/h in less than 30 seconds?

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>>996130
The effects of mental health on people's perception of reality and their imagination is fascinating, don't you think?

>>996229

Are you casting aspersions, cagecuck?

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>>996165
>How does this make you feel?
I feel like Stormfront is gathering. >>996187 >>996189

>>996235

Juden Raus!

>>996235

Here we go, post one cager vid which has a jew in it and the jidf turns up calling everyone nazis. And you wonder why everyone hates you. :^)

All this thread demonstrates is that America is a shithole. For effective measures against cagers, try emigrating to a saner country.

>>996189
/pol/ pls kys

>>996617
basically this.

>>996130
aha this is some perfectly seasoned, al dente pasta

>>996625
back in the oven with you

>>995992
What shitty hellhole do you live in? I live in a civilized country so nothing like that happens here

>>996253
Because you are nazis.

>>996625
Shoulda been 6 million and 1, kike.

>>995941
>riding with a helmet isn't paranoia
>but carrying a gun is
Please explain your position.

>>996101
he's just sorry that he got humiliated
even in his apology he says he sorry for the words he used not the act itself

>>996171
>flat bar road bat
Not that I don't like the idea but what about cables?

Are you a dirty no-brakes fixie hipster?

>>996061
>he does not have a titanium stick with a celeste green latex tube from vittoria mounted magnetically
if I knew where I could get one...

>>995830
>not having disc brakes for your bike mounted MG

>>995992
thank god i'm not american

>>997274
I use 5 min every morning to thank the universe for that.
Just about the time it takes an american to pack his gun and drive to mcdonalds for his breakfast.

>>997274
I'm not. Sweden is this bad.

>>997320
Inte min del av Sverige.

>>995983

Did a gun owner fuck your girlfriend or something? Geez buddy.

>>995681
First aid kit, you amerilard.

>>997338
Where does that post say anything about gun owners? I was talking about people with mental health issues; unless you believe gun owners are mentally deficient? That seems pretty harsh though; why would you even say that?

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>>995681
My lord and savior

because I don't expect to survive

where's Great White when you need him? god has truly abandoned us

>>997583
He's incognito on /n/ since his trip was cracked

He still posts his "honk if you've never seen a gun fired from a bicycle" jersey on /o/. He goes by heartbreaker there.

I don't need to pack anything.

I live in a place where even overtaking within 1.5m of a cyclist is a crime punishable by ridiculous fines.

I've never experienced a 'random cager attack' and I ride a flat bar road bike.

Coincedence? I think not!

My big fat schlong, wrapped in lycra.

>>996101
Hah, little bitch

>>995953
The 12 stitches in my head weren't fucking imanaginary, I can tell you that, cunt.

>>995681
fly 6 and fly12. Not like you are going to be able to react if they want to kill you but at least there will be a recording so the evildoers can be tracked down.

>>997596
Kek I aksed a /g/enlemen to crack and he did it,the absolute madman.

Also GW sucked cheesedick

>>996191
>people tend to speed up

I see this all the time, especially when I coast to a red light and time it so that I never lose momentum. If done properly, I'll usually be able to beat all the cars across the intersection before they catch up with me (2-tons accelerating from a dead stop vs 200 pounds at 10 mph coasting), but I notice plenty of drivers accelerating aggressively to protect their fragile egos.

>THAT FAG ON A BIKE IS GOING FASTER THAN ME? BWAH! NO! I PAY A GORILLION DOLLARS FOR THIS TRUCK!!! FUCK HIM AND FUCK MY TRANSMISSION RRRAAAAAAAAGH!
I can understand when it's a narrow road and they don't want to have to drive slowly behind me or on the edge of their lane to pass, but this happens very many times even when I have a completely dedicated bike lane which doesn't threaten their lane at all.

>>997817
Was making a left in front of a woman who was going to go straight, I guess.
She sped up to over take me on my left, but I was already turning left, so I ended up nearly riding right into her fucking car. (And this comes after a light, so I was certainly seen and had taken the time to shift to a gear which I could easily pedal from a standing stop) Scared the shit out of me so I yelled WHAT THE FUCK? and aborted the turn, going straight into residential houses.
She raged and chased me for a while, yelling and swerving into me. I was turning corners at random to ditch her, so there was no way this wasn't road rage from her.

In the moment, I always forgot to grab the plate number, but honestly, cops don't really care since there's no evidence.
Had to get a police report once after and collision to send to my insurance an they said shit like 'Well, whaddya want me to do?' Like, I dunno, bruh, give a shit?

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I'm thinking of getting this for riding. Thoughts?

>>997850
I've thought about buying the same thing. Tried on something similar at the gun store I work at, poked me in the gut when I was in drops.

>>997822
Go to the police everytime. Granted there is not much they can do, but they will file a report.

If you don't go to the police, stuff like that won't turn up in the statistics and nothing will ever change.

>>997895
Couldn't you turn it sideways so the gun is at your 3 or 4?

>>997850
Wouldnt it make more sense on the back?

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>>997948
They have a few back pockets too

My 6 foot frame and above average sized penis keep me safe.

>>997953
What if a couple of 5'3'' hoodlums shoot off your penis and rape your girlfriend while you bleed out? I don't think being 6ft alone will help you out in a real situation.

>>997954
thats dependent on me not fucking them first, i dont see that happening

>>997956
But you have money and they don't. Why would then not want to take your money if you didn't have sex with them?

>>997957
>you have money
youre making a lot of assumptions here buddy

>>997958
So are the guys shooting your dick.

>>995681
Why, cager repellant Batspray of course, old chap.