wasting my life

i really hope you don't have this problem while driving a vehicle nigga

no, i'm an excellent driver. i am however deathly afraid of a sudden stroke or seizure, sudden death. as the lightning strikes my fingertips as anothewr craving for another pointless gorefest and spells and clicky tappy drinky comes and goes, and the women at the bar get snapped up while my greasy pretty much virgin fingers reach once again for my guitar to noodle away at shit from a failing memory of bright lights and 17424 over 4581236.743 time signature RTS action.

>>75007653
>while playing over one hundred thousand hours of video games

That's about 11.5 years of games straight, you didn't do that.

Sounds like you just need to get out more. Videogames and music are great but if you're using them for escapism and nothing else you're going to ruin yourself.

I get the whole wasting life thing. You need to have something to motivate you and the likes of a video game motivate you so they act as surrogates. You just have to be conscious of that and put your own goals at a higher priority (which I consistently fail to do).
It has a lot to do with environment as well. I've found that the people around you play a large part in how constructive you can be and I personally dropped off heavily when my like-minded friends all managed to nepotism their way out and I was left with all the losers. Power through, anon and maybe cut back on the games.

>>75007653
Change your UI to another language and learn it by brute force.

>>75007905
name one (1) activity that isn't escapism from the horrible realities of life

wtf this makes me want to get run over now

try harder you low IQ goon shit

>>75007976
you see though, i cann't actually play them well anymore. it combines so incorrectly. the math, the music, the OPACITY in my MINDS EYE. i feel so joy. the mental illness from the insults i now generate at such an insane level, oh it could be sucidal.

craning my neck, cracking my bones. i can't remember that one riff, that one 7/8 riff... because i didn't TILT MY HEAD far enough? because then it isn't enemy #4236 of the ice levels? that my ears go kaboom, that i have to use ear drops because I'm afraid of footsteps... from pixelated soldiers?

listening for WHAT?

>>75007653
>listening to over one hundred thousand songs
cool
>playing over one hundred thousand hours of video games
fucking embarrassing

>>75008074
If you want to get technical, any activity has the potential to be escapism. The threshold at which point an interest or hobby becomes escapism is when it stops being something that people do in their recreation time and starts being something they use to avoid responsibilities and things they have to do. Videogames aren't a form of escapism in and of themselves, but they often become a source of escapism for some people. That and the internet and...uh I guess music in this case.

>>75008458
On the deepest level tho, absolutely everything is a distraction from the certainty of death and the meaninglessness of it all

>>75008206
>>75007747
>>75007653
these patterns of thought and speech you're exhibiting are very reminiscent of acid trips i've had

>>75008746
exactly.the chaotic dopamine missle they the drugs of the times past and absent present, are sending out to the various locales of my body in my feverish loneliness always and forever fragmented memories. how could i ever remember anything that was so dynamic? now a fretboard. that's static. perhaps at one point the power pirate decided they wanted all the glory, all the time. maybe i wanted too much of us together. now we as a generator and a conveyor, well, maybe we get angry. i've lost my hearing to the rage. now i hurt myself in place of that scary demon. what the workplace needs is less drama. less que simulator. less of that hellscape of a stage i cut my teeth on for some demented irony.

>>75008746
did you know that acid trips can mimic the experiences of schizophrenia?

>>75009324
This is why I don't take acid anymore. Fucks with my head. Last time I did it I thought I was trapped in the matrix and threw myself in front of a moving car.
Don't take acid if you have any sort of schizophrenic tendencies because it'll make you crazy.

>he didn't spend his time listening to music reading books

into the trash it goes

>>75009490
A month ago 2 of my friends tripped and I decided against it. one of them wanted to watch The Matrix while coming up and I was like nah, that is the worst idea tbdesu.

For me, I already have OCD (i don't think schizo, but who knows) so if my mind latches onto an anxious thought it's hard to get rid of it. And on acid it's like exponential levels of this, and the time dilation makes it intense. Last time I tripped I thought the acid we took was poisoned and I felt like I was literally living in my last few seconds for about an hour. I called one of my friends frantically, the next day he asked "did you call me 12 times?" and I didn't even remember doing that, but yeah. One good thing it did was make me realize how scary dying would actually be and that I don't want to die anytime soon

>>75009527
but what about music reading books... on tape? with music in the background, about music? like music theory, or music history. on tape. like a coffee table book for your brain. we could even amp it up to .avi format, with informative imagery. of tapes.

>>75009585
>so if my mind latches onto an anxious thought it's hard to get rid of it
yep anon im the exact same, i was experiencing some really ugly anxiety on the acid trip. i picked up meditation because of it too.

this is my favorite thread rn

ya no kidding
do you have ASD or OCD by any chance

>>75009585
fuck i was just asking about OCD
i have the same issues
except acid helped me a lot ..
it's been like this since i was a kid, officially diagnosed with OCD btw
it's funny describing it to people and they're like oh ya i relate haha we all have funny fears and thoughts you can't shake
they have no fucking clue what it's like to be tortured by this

>>75007653
It's your choice
You're not happy with it change it

I'm currently going through this wasting of life.

It's hard for me to say that I'm doing something wrong since I don't really have the option to do something better but I still feel like shit for it.

>>75007653
ok what is that image

>>75011582
You haven't looked at his other posts yet, have you?

>>75007653
boo hoo, you worthless nigger

>>75007653
>what part of the brain realizes this

the part not infected by crippling autism

>>75008724
woagh deep