Help me die

You need someone to talk to anon? I can talk if you want.

>>72558319
i have no problems yet i feel like shit, the only reason i can see that i feel this way is because i have increased my chances for mental illness through drug use, ADHD and a high iq dont help either. i am going to end up a schizo because it runs in my family. i have zero motivation to do anything because i don't see the point of living a life of illusions like everybody else. the only outcome is suicide.

>>72558407
I know the feeling anon. I have ADHD too and I failed out of school despite getting a 35 on the ACT. I was sexually abused as a child, which fucks me up to this day. This sounds corny, but focus on getting through each day at a time. Don't think long term right now. Depression strikes people from all walks of life, you shouldn't feel guilty just because you "don't have it bad enough". Feel free to add me on discord if you need someone to talk to, QweX#4083

>>72558504
i'm in grade 12, the entire world expects me to be thinking about the big picture.

>>72558681
Sometimes you have to ignore people to help yourself out anon. Again, feel free to talk to me on discord if you want to, it might be helpful to vent to someone who understands a little bit of what you're going through. Stay safe anon, we all care about you.

Wholesome. Can kindness be 4chan's new meta?

>>72558681
i recommend you vent your feelings to someone, anon. it goes a long way. i don't know you, but i've been suicidal for the past year. it can turn around

>>72558799
kindness is post-ironic

>>72558799
this.

>>72558849
new sincerity

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L7CL8anA1hQ

Here you go anon

Carrie & Lowell by Sufjan Stevens

>>72559633
DFW is dead and gone :(

>>72559653
his words live on my friend

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>>72558294

All effects from any perceived actions anyone takes to "change" your state of being is ultimately yours to decide, their actions yours to interpret.

It is yours:
To choose to DIE by your sadness.
or
To choose to LIVE by your sadness.

But please, for the sake of the person who you secretly want to be (but are too afraid to become): CHOOSE.

I love you guys. I'm in the same grade as OP, going through almost the same situation. Smart, but so depressed that I had to withdraw from school and finish during the summer.
I also have Crohn's Disease, which makes life hell. I got into a good school, but I don't know how I'll ever graduate.

You rarely see sincerity out of this board. Thank you for making me feel like somebody cares.

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>>72558294
Either this meme, specifically "I Know Its Over" or Kid Ayyy

Hey man, I want to die too and I have a girlfriend, job, interests, long term goals. None of it makes it go away. The fear of the worst is what looms in us all. Anybody know anything similar to Elliot Smith or something to make the pain feel at ease?

>>72560198
Elliot Smith is basically a poor man's Nick Drake

>>72558294
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9Dg-g7t2l4

Play some Lil Yachty or Kyle or Lil Uzi Vert 100% suicidal

>>72558294

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ntv9R1She5A

>>72560214
I prefer him to nick Drake. Any other similar artists? Enlighten me, I'm a newfag.

>>72560246
this cover has given me the will to live through the desire to find and kill david draiman

Giles Corey ST
Matt Elliott - Drinking Songs
Nick Drake

There is tons of melanchonic slowcore stuff

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8CnEaPgNo4w

I've been taking wellbutrin for nearly a year now, and I have to say - even though I feel amazing not being completely depressed all the time - sometimes I miss the ennui and suffering because I enjoyed shitty music way more back then.

But yeah, I highly recommend seeing a doctor and getting help. I don't feel like a piece of shit anymore, even if I still am.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zuuObGsB0No

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what were they singing anon?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6qWBfxzv-bQ

>>72560214
Jackson c frank is good too

Busted and Blue by Gorillaz

>>72560246
original is better:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4fWyzwo1xg0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SEvLtTxakrQ

listen to these as you fall into the darkness of death:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LGsRhDKF4a4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UELvVDDXEG0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eYE0VyEVAcU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pygwK0sBUdM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6OqLXvri3M

>>72558294
isn't the happiest music the saddest ?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wD0Mm6WIcYs

>>72558294
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_ihXlWKC7g
hope you feel better Anon, we've all been there

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I cant recommend you this enough, I've been having psychotherapy, because college with ADHD fucks you up really bad, and I am scared like you OP of becoming crazy, tfw when you play the endless game of discovering yourself, just give it a try

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ry94tFG4CIM

https://www.d.umn.edu/~jvileta/nonlaunch/alanwatts/allanwattslectures.html

>>72558407
>i have no problems yet i feel like shit
You're just a little bitch lmao

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YuzAoCgPadc&ab_channel=lightsandsounds10

>>72561817
Fuck you dude, no one likes you

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>>72558407
I like how everyone that isn't happy claims that happiness is just an "illusion" and everybody else is in on the joke but you're not. Try some antidepressants please.

>>72561817
Fucking autist obviously to dim to understand complex mental issues

Ajj

>>72558407
Happiness is comprised of many components, you have to work at all of them in order to feel good

Here's a brief checklist:

-are you where you want to be doing what you want to do?
-do you maintain a healthy diet?
-do you exercise regularly?
-do you work on maintaining healthy relationships with friends, family and lovers?
-are you able to self identify your own mood and do you have mechanisms in place to correct perceived misbehavior?
-do you maintain a steady sleep schedule?

Ultimately life is pointless but I've realized that if I am going to live I might as well do everything I can to make it worthwhile.

I'm not advocating for suicide but there's also no shame in it, It's a choice. Suicide is often implying you have nothing to lose so if you do get close to that dark place go do something you wouldn't do otherwise. Sell all your shit, travel to another continent, buy a ton of drugs. That's what I did and I realized life isn't too bad.

>>72558294
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2Y6E9WTwn8

A crow looked at me by mount eerie ?

>>72558294
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6nCq8CEEF8o&index=17&list=FLh2BZl8A9sDqHXKb0OJeQ-Q&t=304s
you might like this

>>72558294
Keaton Henson - Dear
The Caretaker - An Empty Bliss Beyond This World
Xiu Xiu - A Promise
Low - I Could Live in Hope
Lou Reed - Berlin
Leonard Cohen - Songs of Leonard Cohen
Jandek - Ready for the house
Daniel Johnstone - 1990

Deathconsciousness, Carrie & Lowell, The Glow pt 2, A Crow Looked At Me, Hospice, F#A#infinity, Giles Corey, Closer, etc

Get better m8.