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Post a feel, get an album rec >in a fairly committed relationship

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Post a feel, get an album rec

>in a fairly committed relationship
>coming up on 2 years together
>she's much more invested in it than me even though i try hard to be better about that
>have almost broken up before but i can't stand seeing her cry/get so upset
>new girl at work i've been eyeballing and talking to on my breaks
>starting to see legitimate flaws in my current relationship
>not sure how i feel about anything anymore
>>
>>69776428
Well what is it that isnt working? If you start having doubts and lose interest in her its obvious its not gonna work anymore
>>
>>69776428
>>69776454
Also this album is the ultimate relationship breakup album.
https://youtu.be/-twYwXyAxto
>>
>>>/r9k/
>>
>>69776454
I can't even pinpoint that. It just feels like i've lost interest in things the way i used to have.

She struggles with anxiety and depression a lot and i think those aspects are just starting to wear on me. She gets upset and yells at me or gets mad at me about something, like really mad, and i don't feel like i can get mad back because it just compounds the problem. I feel bad for getting upset with her because she talks about how her anxiety and depression have pushed away her previous relationships and i don't want her to feel alone if i end the relationship. we got along really well in the beginning and i could handle these emotional episodes but nowadays it's starting to wear on me

I feel like she doesn't mean it when she gets like that, that it's her mental health issues rearing their ugly head, and so i feel bad "taking it out" on /her/ by getting mad about it, because i don't feel like she actually means what she's saying
>>
https://youtu.be/z4an5bT-vY8

/thread
>>
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my feel: severely depressed lesbian seeing all my friends in happy relationships and losing hope of ever finding someone

>>69776428
Frigid Stars - Codeine
The Charm of the Highway Strip - Magnetic Fields
Still Bummed - Nouns
>>
>Turning 20 soon
>Huge transitional period in my life, feel like I've learnt more about life in the past year than in my first 18 years
>a bit lonely and sad at times, but otherwise life is bretty good
>starting to feel an innate purpose and drive within myself
albums for these mix of feels?
>>
>>69776667
you know, sometimes relationships aren't as good as they're cracked up to be
>>
>>69776667
studio killers
>>
>>69776667

Why dont you hop on that d like god intended?

Are you fat/ugly?

some children oughta make you happy, sweetheart
>>
>>69776727
damn
>>
>the closest female friend and the most important person in my life left me about a month ago because she found out i lied to her
>currently on valproic acid (antipsychotic), two antidepressants (mirtazapine and effexor) and xanax
>also did ecstasy over the weekends but that was a bad idea
>dont have a lot of feeling but can feel myself losing grip on reality and nearing the end
>she will never forgive me and she is suffering worse
>>
>>69776779
I'm not sure about an album but just stay away from any substances and get sober, ecstasy really fucks up the chemical balances in your brain and you might not feel the best for a few days or even weeks. Just stay strong brother
>>
>>69776708
tru honestly, i keep telling myself that but the feeling is still there whether i want it or not

>>69776717
thanks

>>69776727
lmao go back to jacking it to Naruto doujin with a tub of vaseline dude
>>
>>69776696
similar situation at 22. listening to four tet, and other similar electronic artists. BPD is a pain in the ass.

>>69776509
sounds like both of you need alone time to do some growing up. or some breathing room. whatever you want to call it
>>
>>69776779
yeah I gotta second that, especially if you're taking an SSRI or anything like that you NEED to be very careful when you do drugs, a lot of stuff - including ecstasy - could cause serotonin shock which is a nasty ER trip at best and fatal at worst. take care of yourself man

for albums:
the body - no one deserves happiness
car seat headrest - teens of denial (i'm not will i swear)
coil - the ape of naples
miserable - uncontrollable
street sects - end position
whitehouse - bird seed

you can make it through this, i believe in you!
>>
>>69776806
thats fair, sometimes even just casual companionship is good. maybe im just a little biased because my current relationship has lost it's luster.

(this magnetic fields rec is really nice, btw)

My best advice is honestly just to work on yourself and let relationships come to you, that way at least you know they're really into it
>>
>>69776838
i just read up on BPD and I honestly feel like that's what has been my problem I mean
>'Borderline personality disorder (BPD), also known as emotionally unstable personality disorder, is a long-term pattern of abnormal behavior characterized by unstable relationships with other people, unstable sense of self, and unstable emotions.'

this has been me to the fucking t
>>
>>69776850
totally, yeah, thanks for the advice. honestly I know i'm not in a good enough place mentally and emotionally for a relationship right now, and most of the time i can tell myself that what i'm doing is the right thing, i've surrounded myself with good and loving friends. but yknow, like i said the feeling's still there and it's good to have music for it.

glad you like it! i feel like that album gets overshadowed a lot by 69 Love Songs but it's really some of their best work, one of my favorite albums overall.
>>
>>69776882
hey, i'm really glad you found some words to make sense of how you're feeling, that can be a big help. I have BPD also, it's rough. If you're able to and can afford a good therapist who can work with you on DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy) it's a huge help

music:
everything from >>69776845
plus:
Colossal Youth - Young Marble Giants
Knife Man - AJJ
Songs of Faith and Devotion - Depeche Mode
Emergency & I - The Dismemberment Plan
Always Already - La Luna
Con Art - Smart Went Crazy
>>
>>69776889
that's just what has worked for me, in the past. Might end up having less relationships overall, but they will be better than average, or so i have found.

>>69776922
how do you break it to someone that you think they might have BPD? I am worried about my girlfriend
>>
>>69776980
If we're talking about mental illness and relationships, I'm surprised no one's mentioned The Antlers - Hospice.
>>
>>69776882

Everyone can shoehorn himself into one of those vague and broad mental illness definitions.

These threads work more with abstract feelings instead of being very specific about it.

>explain my situation
>get recommending music in a genre which doesn't sound appropriate for me
>>
>>69776980
christ, i have no idea how to do that. would take a lot more tact than i have. you could be more vague though and just say, "hey, i've been really worried about you lately, have you thought about maybe seeing a therapist?"
>>
>>69776779
what did you lie about?
>>
>>69777051
plot twist: she's already seeing her therapist for anxiety and depression related issues but i think her condition is more BPD than A/D
>>
>>69777079
and Boris: Pink might be good
>>
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>>69777084
oh damn. i'd generally be pretty careful about diagnosing anyone but youself like that, unless you're trained? but you do know her a hell of a lot better than i do. i really can't think of anything but if her situation is getting really bad, you could talk to her about going into an intensive outpatient program, or voluntary inpatient care as a last resort. don't know what mental health resources are like where you are
>>
>>69776696
I'm in almost the exact same boat. When is your birthday?
>>
this thread is comfy
>>
>>69777139
well it's not like i feel like i'm diagnosing her, but it just seems like the things she is experiencing, mood swings and other such indicators, point more towards BPD than just general A/D stuff. even down to common phrases that encompass these things, one that comes to mind is "I hate you, don't leave me" which is the title of a book about BPD, and also almost exactly how she feels about me sometimes

i dont know
>>
>>69777180
well, since she's seeing a therapist, you could suggest that she bring up these mood swings and other feelings at her appointment? like, it sounds like these experiences have been putting a lot of strain on your relationship and making you worry a lot, if you bring that up and make it clear that this is coming from a place of concern for her well-being and safety, rather than a place of control or resentment, it would probably go over well
>>
>read a bit of anna karenina, got pretty disturbed, its a hard read
>seems like mom is hiding something for me, cant look me into eye without fidgeting
>cba to go to uni classes
>fb chatting with some shy qt i really like, goin really slow
>no new music i like in months
>>
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>be in a six year on and off again relationship
>things going pretty well for two years, plan to propose in 2017
>live together for one and a half years
>yep this is it, 2017 is the year
>girlfriend sexually assaulted at a friends place in mid-2016
>she's not the same person, won't go to therapy, won't take her medication
>try to stay out of her way when she needs it and support her, despite having to work an office job 8am-5pm, and studying full-time to get our lives together, especially with 2017 coming up, we're stronger than this and we'll be better for it
>three weeks ago, she explains that she hates her life, she hates having no money, she hates everything she is doing right now, leaves that afternoon
>now live alone in our house, it's redecorated, but it's still the same house, and I love this house, my dog loves this house.
>spend nights listening to podcasts, new music, and playing guitar.
>lonely, but uncomplicated
>still want kids one day, and a wife
>don't want that relationship
>but miss a relationship
>>
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>>69777347
>lonely, but uncomplicated
>>
>>69777321
Violent Femmes - Violent Femmes
The whole album is solid but check out this song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=frBWvyE_N9I
>>
>>69777321
go to your uni classes, anon
>>
Feeling like I'm top of the world. I crush my enemies with my bare feet. I fuck the women I want to fuck. I am winning the race and NO motherfucker can stop me
>>
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>>69777367

Thanks, bro.
>>
Taking a huge shit that wont come out
>>
>Taking my uni assignments with no pressure
>not doing so well in some classes
>regained my will to write poetry
>have no money
>>
>>69777398
Some sabaton like the art of war maybe ? Turisas could fit to
>>
>>69777456
My morning jacket - it still moves
>>
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>weed makes me anxious but I still smoke
>start hearing things that aren't there when I get high
>started smoking cigarettes again
>in general life is becoming a mess again
>tfw she probably doesn't love me back and I can't move on

That last one hurts the most, probably why I started fucking up again. Been listening to IDLSIDGO again a lot recently. Grief might be one of my favorite songs ever.
>>
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>>69777526
Hi me from one year ago, Try to not smoke weed with people, that helped me.
Listen to this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kGkyIOOuhOA
>>
>>69777170
Album for this feel?
>>
just kinda lonely and confused
>>
>>69777551
Hello me from the future. Weirdly enough, when I smoke alone I get what could be described as auditory hallucinations. When I'm with other people I feel safer I guess. Although my new years resolution is to go straight edge for as long as possible, so we'll see how that goes.

Thank you for the rec, I barely have any Japanese music and this sounds interesting.
>>
>>69777164
june 11th, so not really 'soon', but 6 months aint long
>>
>>69777526
>>69777551
i smoked weed socially throughout all of HS, even tho i would almost always be anxious when high.
when i started smoking alone for a while things got really really weird and really intense. I'd experience extrasensory communication, really strong hallucinations.
It also helped me remember my dad used to abuse me as a kid
Now I don't smoke no mo.
>>
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>hating your group of friends to an absurd amount
>continue to hang out with them because you all live in the same frozen boring hellhole
>confusion
>feeling empty and angry all the time
>had a nervous breakdown last year and scared of repeating that experience
>>
>>69778195
i hate my friends by the front bottoms

>>69777438
walls fall out

>on break from university
>haven't really met anyone in the one and a half years i've been there now
>haven't dated anyone since my junior year of high school
>funding dried up at my on campus job, got let go
>have met a few people on campus recently watching movies
>usually hang out with them for several hours one night a week
>not really sure what i'm doing with my life
>6'4, probably come off as intimidating to most people because bad at talking to new people
>mostly just wanna meet a cute girl and hang out and watch x-files and talk about aliens and shit
>seems like a pipe dream at this point
>>
>>69778263
The Cure - Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Kiss Me
>>
>>69776696
Similar feels here
GNFPWLBN - modest mouse
We're gonna make it anon
>>
>>69777470
Jandek - six and six i think
>>
>23 year old with no degree yet and massive piles of debt
>work my ass off now because i have to catch up with study and paying debt thanks to being a retard previously
>been in relationship for 7 years, not really happy but what does it matter being alone is even worse and i wouldn't want to have another gf anyway
>most of my free time is spent doing social obligations
>i miss having time to do things i like
>wish i hadn't been such a fuckup previously
>suicide is comforting thought

music for this feel
>>
>getting a job spiraled me downwards mentally last year
>most things that make others happy do nothing for me. I have no interest in relationships, a career, living long, having kids and never have
>family constantly gives me shit because I'm not fucking whores or making good money
>feels like everything I've done in my life was just to distract myself from my true feelings
>every time I get what I want I feel empty
>no one takes me seriously when I tell them how I feel/just say it will get better on repeat
>I feel as though my own depression isnt a big deal, especially when I put things in perspective
>started drinking after being straight edge for 23 years other substances followed
>I plan on getting rid of everything and seeing how bad life can get for 2017
>realized that hope is the most depressing thing ever and stopped believing in it
>the more I realize me or nothing else matters the happier I feel

I mean, I found a lot of comfort in Low, Swans, Johnny Hobo, Crywank and the like.

I guess I'd just like more music to wallow in this hopeless happiness I'm in.
>>
>>69776428
>tfw when relationship with family is deteriorating
>>
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>walking through town
>meet cute girl
>immediately feel comfortable around her
>same interests
>have a good time
>she isn't single

Rec me something pls
>>
>>69778589
The sound of you calling your parents and sorting that shit out. Seriously, middle-aged people don't live forever, don't learn it the hard way.
>>
>>69778666
nah im good
>>
>>69778718
Fine, then go sulk to Antlers or whatever you pathetic piece of shit.
>>
>two exes message me in one night while i'm over a thousand miles away for the holidays
>one is super nice but has tons of issues that I can't focus on when I have my own to deal with at the moment
>one has been obsessed with me over a year after leaving her for the girl above, because she led me on for about 6 months even though we both really liked each other
>experiencing financial problems
>had a rough quarter at school
>all these feels come rushing back even though I know I'm so much better off
>most music isn't enjoyable to me anymore so I mainly listen to podcasts save for a few artists and the music I'm working on with my band
>tfw still miserable and I don't know when things are going to get better

I know I'm better off now that I'm single but I'm so fucking lonely, and I don't think I enjoy music as much anymore. Maybe I need to go back and listen to stuff I did when I wasn't so depressed.
>>
>graduating next semester
>intense post-grad job already starting up
>long ass commute
>have to study for licensing exams to even be able to work job
>material to study is way more than they had me expect it to be and I'm stressed
>overwhelmed with new job, school, health as I just got surgery and can't exercise to blow off some steam
>for the first time ever I don't think I want to be in a relationship/can trust anyone
>disillusioned with if I'm okay with this
>can only wait and see how shit plays out and pray i pass the work exams

haven't really listened to anything lately that's really stuck with me and these feels
>>
>all these feels
>no recs
>>
>>69779859
These threads are really just a place for people to express what's happening in their life when they feel like it's difficult to explain to people face to face. God, these threads were a form of therapy for me back in the day. Sometimes just being reminded that you aren't alone and people struggle with similar problems is comforting.
>>
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>>69777321

Orchid - Dance Tonight! Revolution Tomorrow!
>>
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>live in small town
>quitting safe cushy job to
>go back to community college
>burnout
>dont like my gf
>miss my old gf
>>
>Know a girl, let's call her A, for years now
>Become basically best friends
>Supports me through all my relationshit and keeps it real with me
>Recently find out she's had a major crush on me, but att I'm in another relationship and honestly I'm not sexually attracted to her so we stay "just friends"
>Recently the aforementioned relationship starts going to hell
>Really need someone to talk with
>Obviously it's A
>After hours of just aimlessly walking around and talking she actually convinces me to stay with my current gf and work on our issues
>Meanwhile my gf's bitch ass friends are hating A in the guts because they think she's somehow sabotaging our relationship
>Gf's believing them and starts treating her kinda shittily too
>Tell her how ironic everything is
>she's quiet for a bit
>I-I just want you to be h-happy anon
>tfw
>I want to hug her
>I want to tell her how much she means to me
>I want to cry
>Instead just look away and mumble something in the lines of
>t-that's nice of you
WHY AM I SUCH A PIECE OF SHIT MUSIC FOR THIS GAY FUCKING FEEL
>>
>>69776428
Are you my boyfriend? Because if it's you I already noticed and I fucking hate you for trying to bullshit me every time you "go out with your coworkers". End it already.
>>
>>69780601

salvia palth - melanchole
>>
>starting university next spring
>nothing to do for months
>all relationships with friends from school quickly fell apart
>feeling really isolated and bored
>just reading, listening to music and doing chores all day
>relationship with the boy i had a crush on for years quickly fell through
>have to study something i immensely dislike because my family's financial situation doesn't allow something less than profitable


>>69778442
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6LEF9p5E0U
>>69778547
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mBNKUda-s6M

You honestly seem to have the emotional maturity of a 14 year old.

>>69778637
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohldk_DzcLk

>>69779235
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_Eqr1Xdhug

>>69779378
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmqEBty1kRE

>>69780551
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1zIHSwQgMk8
>>
How do I learn to love myself? Because I can never be in a happy relationship if I'm not able to do that. A therapist at my university is putting me into a program called Pathways that helps students with depression and stuff but I'm afraid it might not help and I'll still deal with this.

I just constantly feel like I have to help myself. My last gf is an alcoholic and she sobered up for a while, while we were together. I spent so much time supporting her and I realize now that I never once focused on myself. It turned into a long distance relationship and I found out she started drinking again and I just felt so betrayed. Like, the amount of effort and time I put into that, only to be let down. I could have focused on myself, tried harder in school, stopped worrying about others. I could be in a much better place right now. Now I'm lonely and afraid for my future. Fuck, I'm in tears right now. I haven't cried in a long time.
>>
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ITT
>>
>>69780808
damn......
>>
>>69780728

lyrically relatable, musically no, im

>>69780551

we are in similar situations

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lnvxzef3lAU
>>
>>69780808
fuuuck. I mean, I fit the looks aspect but I wouldn't say I act the same way. I'm liberal and all for equality but I'm not gonna be some SJW who lashes out at anyone who says something offensive on Twitter. I have a fucking sense of humor.
>>
>>69780852
>replying to bait
nu-male!
>>
>>69780836
The song you posted is really nice, so thanks. Small towns really suck in general i guess.
>>
>>69780728
This instrumental Bowie album is chill as fuck. Thanks anon.
>>
>>69780911

yw/good luck
>>
>>69780911
>>69780911
I mean, I live in a smallish town. About 18,000 people live there. Whenever I go to Seattle I just feel so fucking overwhelmed. I can't stand how busy the big cities are. It would drive me nuts to live in an atmosphere like that. Give me the nature and the generally friendly feeling that it provides. The city just feels so fake to me.
>>
>>69781012
Less than 6000 people live here, and I love going to big cities. Never been to an American city though.
>>
>>69780728
>You honestly seem to have the emotional maturity of a 14 year old.

Cool, my family even posts on 4chan.
>>
>>69780601
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o0h75xJHi84
You're gonna be an ugly girl
>>
>>69781131
Seattle used to be pretty rad, but gentrification is ruining all the parts that used to be cool. Amazon moved into the downtown and now all the housing is super expensive and the people that once lived there can't afford it anymore.

American cities are okay, but I'll always prefer living in the rural areas.
>>
>>69780760
Alcoholism sucks.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vanmmHQVysQ
>>
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>think im gonna break up with GF tonight
>have her christmas present
>gonna give it to her and then break up

music for the drive home afterwards?
>>
>>69776667
Hi Zoe
>>
>>69781343
Pls be the girl I like's bf
>>
>that feel when you know how to successed but choose to fail.
>>
>>69781358

if she is please go to her after tonight
>>
I want to got out with a coworker who I'm into.

SHe's 7 years younger than I am.

She's into all sorts of music and same stupid shit I am.

We've talked a lot about going out. But we've never done shit.

I swear I don't know if I should keep going with this. I like my job.
>>
>>69781343
Washer by Slint
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6yEgcb167k4
>>
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>>69781698

ill do this, love this song
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVg0lBtzgQQ
>>
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>>69776428
>Completely wrecked my back after some faggot totals my car
>Have been depressed and on meds
>Feel trapped in room since no car
>Haven't kept contact with gf in two weeks either because stress and meds make me act funny
>Won't respond when I attempt to talk to her
>Thinking about breaking up with her anyways
>Realizing the only two things I give a shit about is my brother and guitar
>Feel this since the majority of people just don't get me or can connect on same level
>Not even the cute girl from Lush trying to message me interests me
>>
>>69781561
>h-hey did your bf break up with you yesterday by any chance
>>
>>69777526
Suck man, bad road to walk down.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VlqGv1ODpXo
>>
>>69778195
Move away! Foreign country if possible, best thing i ever did for myself.
>>
>>69776882
>it's an anon tries to diagnose himself on wikipedia.

If you find a degree of mental suffering or questions you cannot deal with yourself go to a fucking professional, it's what they are there for. It's their job.

.t a mental healthcare worker.
>>
>>69777321
>in uni
>reading anna karenina, its a hard read

ffs. Either grow a brain or drop out of uni.
>>
>>69781262
It really does. Seeing someone you loved that had so much potential just throw it away because of it. Seeing them deny that it's a problem is even worse. She messaged me last night. Pretty sure she had been drinking. She got kicked out of her aunt's house that she'd been living at for school because of her drinking. How do I stop worrying about someone when they aren't even in my life anymore?
>>
>she doesn't love me back
>waste almost all of my time doing nothing
>leave the house every now and then
>have a few friends but don't see them much
>feel like i'm wasting my life but don't know what to do about it
>scared of the future
>she doesn't love me back
>liked her for a really long time
>she doesn't love me back
>>
>>69776509
Are you me?
>>
>>69777347
We don't have each other - Aaron west
may not be what is happening to you but it's a really cathartic album
>>
>failed A levels big time
>doing shitty btec now because I know there's no point retaking
>all my friends have gone to uni now
>haven't been ableable to make any new ones
>all I do is go to college, go to the gym, then go home to sleep
>never even talk to anyone at the gym, just go in, lift, leave
>>
File: pepe.jpg (19KB, 320x315px) Image search: [Google]
pepe.jpg
19KB, 320x315px
Just went to visit a long distance friend/ex for the first time. I've known her for 6 years.

>Drive in the snow for 7 hours, get there at like 7:30 after a bunch of misadventures on the road (like going off it once)
>Get out of the car, look at her for the first time, and we embrace, standing in the -1 degree (F) weather for 3 minutes, or an eternity.
>Go inside, she's super nervous and shy, not sure what to do
>That night, hold hands while we sleep
>Next day, roommate leaves for exam, we cuddle and make out until he gets back
>Then we binge watch cartoons all day, cuddling up to each other.
>Then that night, her friend calls her drunk, asking for us to pick them up and get mcdonalds
>Me, Her, and Roommate pick them up, girl we pick up heavily implies girl I went to see and the the guy we picked up are dating
>Talk about it later, she insists they're just close friends, we talk about our past, tell her I love her, and a bunch of other stuff.
>Next day, roommate leaves, we watch cartoons and cuddle most of the day, just idly talking, and such.
>That night we're talking about the past, then about how she'll have to leave early because of a family emergency.
>We end up being intimate, but stop because she feels like she has a pit in her stomach, end the night spooning and talking.
>Last day we just kinda talk and sit around, kiss a bunch, she tries on outfits in front of me, and then an emotional goodbye.

That's my feel. Sorry for the blog post, but I wanted to get it off my chest. Now I'm just not sure whether to go for it further or not. Love this girl as lame as that is.
>>
>want to start a project
>constantly think of different ways in which I would fail
>give up with the excuse that maybe someday I 'll do it
>get depressed because my biggest fear is dying without being relevant
>>
>>69784689
you're mediocre and it will probably fail anyway. work hard at your job/college and stop thinking you're a special snowflake. you will go much further in life this way.
>>
>8 years single
>too lazy to do anything of worth with life
>dead end job
>no self esteem
>waiting for parents to die so I can sudoku myself

I'm one of those people that says "my friends will call me if they want to hang out," knowing they won't call me and turn around and use this as negative reinforcement on how my friends have more fun without me so I never call them.
>>
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