Hey /mu/, guess how Bowie makes his hamburgers.

>>68740134
"God Knows I'm Good at cooking burgers", Bowie remarks to himself. Whipping out the ground beef, pushing it into The Width Of A Circle, he lovingly slapped it onto the grill and began his work. He'd served burgers to many people before; even some famous fellows, Andy Warhol being one of his most frequent customers. His Uncle Arthur had taught him everything he knew, carrying on the family's burger business with his Big Brother. He and his brother had been in charge of the joint for Five Years, and he loved it. His customers adored his burgers just as much as Bowie enjoyed making them; their deliciously juicy girth, all covered in melty cheese and fresh veggies, topped with the hottest, freshest buns... they Never Get Old. They'd travel up to Kingdom Come for them if they had to.

As professional hamburger chef Bowie flips his meat, he grabs a container of special seasonings; the special thing that gives his meat its special kick that makes all the Kooks and Girls go crazy for its delicious taste. Mixed with Seven different seasonings, he begins to Shake It, before dashing a few sprinkles over the beef. Bowie remarks to himself, "I Know It's Gonna Happen Someday", thinking to the eventual chance that his restaurant be featured on the Food Network, maybe becoming the host of a show on there. It had been his dream to receive Fame from doing what he loved, hoping to become a Future Legend.

After giving the beef a final, freshly cooked char; a Slow Burn that absorbs all of the grill's immense Heat, he's ready to create the full burger.

This particular order he was making was the Little Wonder, one of his restaurant's most popular items. He'd always spend plenty of Time preparing the burger, making sure it was perfect. It Ain't Easy making burgers as good as his, you know. He places the cooked meat atop the lower half of a hamburger bun, topping it with lusciously crisp lettuce, two slices of bright red tomato, and a thick, melty slice of cheddar cheese.

1/2

Prismadoll (ID: !Odfh3kcRAA) 2016-10-29 02:00:51 Post No.68744071
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Prismadoll (ID: !Odfh3kcRAA) 2016-10-29 02:00:51 Post No.68744071 [Report]

>>68744038
"Oh, I Keep Forgettin'", Bowie realizing that he forgot to get out the thousand island dressing. He drizzles a lovely swirl of it atop the finished burger, before placing the top half of the hamburger bun onto the burger, lancing in down the top to the bottom with a toothpick to hold it all together.

Bowie looks outside the kitchen's counter window, onlooking to the restaurant's table area. The place is packed. "It's awfully busy Tonight. With Friday On My Mind, I can hardly wait for Drive In Saturday", Bowie cheekily snickers. His drive in windows get awfully busy on the weekends. Sunday as well, with a Chic Fil A being across the street from him; he sometimes get customers who mistakenly went there thinking it was open, only to be met with disappointment. His store is right across the street though, so they'll usually hop on over to his burger joint and order that instead. He doesn't mind the high traffic though; this is his dream job, afterall. Many people had offered him the opportunity to purchase his business off of him, but he was Dead Against It. "What In The World? I Can't Give Everything Away!", he would usually tell the potential buyers. He could never sell his beloved restaurant to another; it meant too much to him. After All, it was his family business, passed on from generations. While his humble burger joint sat on A Small Plot Of Land and could use the potential for expansion, it wouldn't be the same if another company were to take over. The customers might not like the Changes either.

He places the finished burger onto the counter window, completing the order for the waiter to bring on over to the customer's table, before going to Move On to making the next order.

The hours draw by. "Here Comes The Night", Bowie remarks, as the moon starts to blissfully shine, the clock now reaching 9. Almost closing time, another day's worth of work done. He wishes he could Stay, but he'll be back again tomorrow for another day of serving burgers.

NoteLord (ID: !!wxRLtW45xau) 2016-10-29 02:02:13 Post No.68744096
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NoteLord (ID: !!wxRLtW45xau) 2016-10-29 02:02:13 Post No.68744096 [Report]

>>68744038
>>68744071
you're a living, breathing fucking meme

Anonymous 2016-10-29 02:03:08 Post No.68744108
[Report] Image search: [Google]

Anonymous 2016-10-29 02:03:08 Post No.68744108 [Report]

File: 1377373453416.png (69KB, 300x250px) Image search: [Google]

69KB, 300x250px

>>68744038
>>68744071
I knew I bumped this thread for a reason.

10/10 Best Trip 2016.

King DDDDDDeath 2016-10-29 02:04:56 Post No.68744142
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King DDDDDDeath 2016-10-29 02:04:56 Post No.68744142 [Report]

>>68744038
>>68744071
What are you fuckin gay ?
I bet you jerk it to pizzahut ads. fuckin /ck/ucks

Anonymous 2016-10-29 02:06:22 Post No.68744167
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Anonymous 2016-10-29 02:06:22 Post No.68744167 [Report]

ground and sizzlin

Anonymous 2016-10-29 02:07:55 Post No.68744202
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Anonymous 2016-10-29 02:07:55 Post No.68744202 [Report]

>>68740708
wow that was a shit joke
>>68740956
>>68742924
>>68744038
>>68744071
worth coming to this thread for these though

Lionweed (ID: !sLion/aqM6) 2016-10-29 02:08:09 Post No.68744209
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Lionweed (ID: !sLion/aqM6) 2016-10-29 02:08:09 Post No.68744209 [Report]

>>68744038
>>68744071
Why did you do that to yourself?

Anonymous 2016-10-29 02:11:22 Post No.68744265
[Report] Image search: [Google]

Anonymous 2016-10-29 02:11:22 Post No.68744265 [Report]

File: mario.jpg (7KB, 158x153px) Image search: [Google]

7KB, 158x153px

>>68744038
>>68744071
include me in this screenshot please

Lionweed (ID: !sLion/aqM6) 2016-10-29 02:12:04 Post No.68744280
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Lionweed (ID: !sLion/aqM6) 2016-10-29 02:12:04 Post No.68744280 [Report]

>>68744265
no. let us not do such a thing.

Anonymous 2016-10-29 02:16:33 Post No.68744358
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Anonymous 2016-10-29 02:16:33 Post No.68744358 [Report]

>>68744038
>>68744071
holy fucking lol

Anonymous 2016-10-29 02:18:22 Post No.68744392
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Anonymous 2016-10-29 02:18:22 Post No.68744392 [Report]

>>68740134
with the fires of charmeleon

joke explanation: this is a slightly absurdist pun based on the oft repeated description of bowie being an artistic chameleon - and you need to fry burgers with heat, and the only fire breathing chameleon of note is charmeleon (a pokemon) - and thinking of bowie as a pokemon trainer is excellent absurdist humor because it is both strange and unexpectedly modern (david bowie's fame mostly predates video gaming in general and pokemon in particular)