Too much shrooms

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCtFJ4uUIdk

maybe they were just disagreeing with your stomach.

BLACK THEN WHITE ARE

Try wholeheartedly thinking you're dead and in the deepest depths of the afterlife and then come back

>>68622733
I took them on too little sleep, they were disagreeing with that. I felt to tired and my thoughts just kept getting faster and faster. I couldn't eat and thought that since I couldn't turn off my brain that I was literally going to think myself to death. I tried lying down to sleep it off, and became convinced that all of reality was just an illusion I had created for myself because I was god and incredibly lonely. I thought that coincidences were things actually under my control, and I was merely pretending that I am only human. I thought about a lot of things, and became very scared for my sanity. I even pissed myself, lol. I no longer think I am god, but I can't stop thinking about death. I used to not believe in the concept of the soul, but I have begun to. What happens when I die? My entire belief system is completely turned around.

>>68622791
>became convinced that all of reality was just an illusion I had created for myself because I was god and incredibly lonely. I thought that coincidences were things actually under my control, and I was merely pretending that I am only human.
but thats all true

>>68622791
>What happens when I die?
as of right now nothing but black holes literally rip apart time and space so that seems like a pretty good foundation to get some things done

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Shrooms are a pretty cool experience. Depending on how long it's been, you should feel completely fine and think normally after a couple days. I remember the first time I took them I feel into a really deep depression and genuinely felt nothing at all. I developed a really existential point of view where I didn't care for anything or anyone, including myself, and all I could think of was that it'd be easier to kill myself. I think I was listening to Kid A mostly that time.

However, I took them again recently and it was a much more interesting and joyful experience. I was well rested and they didn't give me any nausau. I also took a lot more so I got some solid trips and felt good the whole way through. I listened to Geogaddi while walking around in a forest and it's now one of my dearest music listening experiences. Maybe give that a listen and you'll feel better, Geogaddi is a powerful album.

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>>68622685
kangding ray

amber decay

>>68622810
I was tripping with my friend. When I laid myself down to rest, I began to hallucinate and thought I was talking to him(or rther that he was interrogating me) when I "realized" I was God, he began to try to convince me otherwise. I had decided that I should die and restart a new life so that I could forget that I was God. "Sam ( my name) is dead. He took shrooms, shrooms are symbolic of realizing I am God. My friend told me something about going home, one last ditch effort to convince me to be sam again. "It's all just a part of being human." he said with a smile. He knew he was just my illusion, he just wanted me to be happy and pretend again that I didn't know I am God.

>>68622791
You are a god though. You are the god of your own life. Maybe it was trying to tell you to find purpose or attempt to figure out long term goals

Life is a small blip and before you know it, it's over. Might as well do something with it

>>68622873
dude

>>68622791
this sounds like something straight out of white noise. death is unavoidable. try to achieve all your goals so dying seems less of an untimely circumstance

>>68622910
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0EppHc_ZCRA

>>68622876
The only reason I have not killed myself is because I know that I only have to live 80 or so more years anyway. I once saw a rapport building technique that said that when you first introduce yourself to somebody you should establish a time limit on your conversation. "I gotta go in 10 min. but I wanted to introduce myself to you..." If I thought that I would live forever, if I actually were God, I would just turn myself off. That was the worst part about that experience that I thought I would exist in lonliness for all eternity. Perhaps the meaning of life is to believe that you can die.

>>68622958
>Perhaps the meaning of life is
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_nEDjAmRSxg

>>68622685
Kilt - Santa Muerte

>>68622810
This. The self is a dynamic and ever-changing microcosm of all that exists. Life is a big cosmic play where we play hide and seek with our true nature. Every time we find it, we forget we did just to keep things interesting. J Krishnamurti and Alan Watts are good resources for this school of thought.

>>68622860
Not OP but I genuinely believe Geogaddi is a magical album. I've owned it for probably around 5 years now and I still manage to learn new things about it every listen. I'm jealous of your experience, sounds amazing

>>68623059
>Geogaddi is a magical album
It really is. I usually listen to it in special or anxious moments and it always makes me feel a certain content feeling. Every time I listen to it I feel like I'm listening to something new for the first time, even though I know all the songs. All the unique sounds and atmospheres in it make it one of my favorite albums ever.

>>68622958
>I once saw a rapport building technique that said that when you first introduce yourself to somebody you should establish a time limit on your conversation. "I gotta go in 10 min. but I wanted to introduce myself to you...

Can you elaborate on what this is supposed to achieve

>>68622958
>The only reason I have not killed myself is because I know that I only have to live 80 or so more years anyway

Get some goals and find something you enjoy, dude. You felt loneliness because you have nothing going for you currently and are just going through the motions. Find something you want to do for the next fifty or so years and work for it.

It's shitty getting out of depression but it gets better. I've been in the same position and I can't say I'm not depressed now but I'm at the point where I can get through a decent period of time without wanting to kill myself because I'm working towards something I want to do with my life. It's almost like an understanding of "hey this is my life and there's seemingly unlimited possibilities" but less cheesy and over the top.

We are all gods of our own life. You just have to realize it first

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>>68622685
take a trip to el paso op...

>mfw took 3 130mg mdma pills last night and woke up to realise I had an allergic reaction, my face looks like my acne has broken out really bad, lips are all red, swollen and sore, rash all over my fingers, hands, ankles etc
not to mention I woke my mum up talking to intimate objects like the kettle that I thought I was seeing faces in, and also was seeing mist coming off random things throughout the house and also seeing bugs infesting my bed, which were only just small stains in my bed sheets I thought were moving

>>68623119
classic

>>68623087
Sorry, I kinda just half started that thought. It achieves a sense of start and end. Part of the reason of why it may be uncomfortable to begin talking to a stranger is because if you don't like talking to them, it may be hard to disengage, you may be stuck in a conversation you don't want to be in for too long. Establishing a time restraint on your interaction takes off that pressure. I guess I was comparing this to the knowledge that life also has a time restraint, that I would kill myslef long before I reached the age of 100 if I thought I was immortal.

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>>68622958
>I once saw a rapport building technique that said that when you first introduce yourself to somebody you should establish a time limit on your conversation. "I gotta go in 10 min. but I wanted to introduce myself to you..."

>>68623084
It definitely has a certain feeling no matter when you listen to it. Like a strange, mystic, otherworldly feeling. It's very hard to describe. Someday I want to visit the real Redpoint Beach and listen to it there.

BTW, if youve never listened to the whole album backwards, prepare to have your mind blown.

>>68623200
>if youve never listened to the whole album backwards, prepare to have your mind blown

Holy shit I've never really thought of that. I might have to reverse it through my record player and hear that. Did you start from the end of the album and work your way forward?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y8vP4s0NeX8

>>68623119
that sounds more like MDA or MDE

>>68622685
>ate weed
>nothing happened
muzak for this feel?

>>68623218
Yes, I just put the FLAC album into audacity but if you can reverse your record player more power to you. I truly believe the album was meant to be heard both ways. LOTS of hidden messages too, but I'll let you find those for yourself.

>>68623236
nah I know they are mdma
supposedly high doses can produce hallucinations

>>68623247
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Se9vvLsVUI

you know thc is fat soluble right?

>>68623050
This is exactly what I had come to the conclusion of. Even now, reading what you had written, I am half convinced that the fact that somebody else has come to this conclusion is a self decieving mechanism I have created for myself to believe that this is just a natural thoughts for humans to have, as opposed to believing what I know deep down to be true.

>>68623272
no dude im pretty sure you're wrong

>>68623286
no I'm not, I've had these ones many times before, just not in that high of a dose
and mda is an active metabolite of mdma so as you can imagine, with a fairly high dose of mdma, there would also be a substantial amount of mda in your body to cause those effects

>>68623286
I've heard that it can from my friend but the internet might know

I'm glad I stumbled upon this thread because I feel directionless too. I almost broke up with my SO today. I have no idea what I'm doing in my life.

>>68622791
that's true dude, you are god.

>>68623367
Maybe YOU are God. you have known all along. But as time moves on it will become harder and harder to ignore. Eventually, you will be on your death bed, your body will be old and decrepit, and you will begin to understand the insignificance of it all. Your name, the way you acted and the things you liked, they were all ways to distract yourself, your true self, from you awareness. You will realize this and have to come to the conclusion that this life was just a daydream, a fantasy to escape the dreaded reality of immortality. Life is a good alternative to this realization, and you will have to make yourself not only forget this but everything else you know in order to not become the chaos of immortal insanity. You will have to hypnotize yourself into becoming reborn.

Ego Death is some crazy shit, Anon. Welcome to the other side of it.

i never took shrooms but from what people tell me i feel llike i reach the same frame of mind they are talking about when i smoke weed sometimes. anyway i'm going to take some golden teachers right now and chill alone all day
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=80ijR8XePes

>>68623437
I am god, but I'm also a diagnosed schizoid, not to mention schizophrenia runs in my family. Rip.