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Slave Pony Thread #127

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Previous thread: >>30845067
(Archive Link: http://yuki.la/mlp/30845067)

>What is this thread about?
This thread revolves around stories about ponies being enslaved.

>Can you elaborate more?
Sure! SPG (Slave Pony General) is mostly about characters dealing with the actual implications of the horrifying thing that is chattel slavery. It's more looking at how people with modern sensibilities deal with the ownership of another sentient being, and how most people aren't total cunts.
If you want an explanation on the differences between /SPG/ and /SiM/, go check out the FAQ.

Are you new and want to write your own story but have no previous experience?
Check out these guides:
https://pastebin.com/V1ujiyJt
https://pastebin.com/bnMmZ2T3
https://pastebin.com/g4VpEg4f (clop specific)

If you're ever having a writer's block and need advice or want to chill with us, come to our Discord server! https://discord.gg/nVA3wW6

---
Featured Story:
---
Interstellar Celly (Celestia) by PhysicalAnontism
- https://pastebin.com/NFR8gGqz

---
Most Recently Completed Stories:
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Something, at least (Twilight Sparkle) by AspiringWritefag
- https://pastebin.com/9TkjPm3N

Because I Choose to (Starlight Glimmer) by Mercury
- Part 1: https://pastebin.com/qaSx0kEU
- Part 2: https://pastebin.com/GKxvUCek

---
Useful Links
---
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FAQ: https://pastebin.com/iVB2JJz0
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Completed Stories [12]: https://pastebin.com/82rCVh4j
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Popular Stories [Updated 8/23/2017]: https://pastebin.com/vsnYXKba
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>>
Comfy Mare Slaves when?
>>
Filly brothel when?
>>
>>30877507
Miss the mandatory GIF anon
>>
>>30877504
what is that?
>>
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>>30877492
>as you pull over to a stop you index the hazard button on the dash
>you unbuckle your seatbelt and reach over and grab your phone as snap feverishly unbuckles herself and busts out of the passenger door
>leaning over against your elbow, nothing but the sound of cars whizzing by and your hazards rhythmically clicking occupies your ears
>a minute goes by and there's no sign of snap yet
>as if on cue the door lethargically swings open
>snaps peering over the side, a deep blush enveloping her muzzle
"are you done yet?"
>"a-anon I can't"
"what do you mean you can't?"
>"I can't... mfph there's people and I can't!"
"what..?"
>"there's cars... and they can see me ok! can you cover me or"
>fucking hell
>after waiting for a few cars to scream by you quickly jump out and walk around to her
>after awkwardly shuffling around you come to terms with holding your t-shirt like a curtain to cover her
>she's still violently red in the face, her legs criss crossing as she struggles to lift her tail
>you look away from her, mimicking a spanish bull fighter as you pose idlely with your draped shirt
>you wait for sound but nothing comes
>glancing in the reflection of the van you see her trembling
>she can't even get a trickle going
>you shuffle a bit, nervously watching your little mare squat hopelessly in the dirt
>after about 30 more seconds you break
"...snap?"
>she's almost hysterical
>"I-I can't! a-anon I'm.. I-I"
"Snap it's just you and me, no one else can see you"
>"I-I.."
>it dawns on you
"come on snap let's get this over with"
>she whines, her head drooping low as her ears pin
"Snap we made love two nights ago.. i've made you strip for me in a maids dress.. how is this any worse than-"
>"it just IS ok?"
>she muels that last word out with anger
>just as you're about to drop the shirt a car flys by and lays on the horn
>it's enough to startle snap into shifting
>it broke her focus and all at once her dam breaks
>>
>>30877521
Don't worry, I'll cover for him.
>>
>>30877657
NIGGA WHY IS YOUR CAPITALIZATION SO INCONSISTENT.
>>
>>30877683
Forgot to put [SPOILER] anon, your image will be baned for violating the code of the forum
>>
>>30877688
this
really bothers me 2bqhwy famalamilia
either use it all the time or dont use at all
>>
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>>30877657
>you'd be a lying son of a bitch to say you didn't watch at least a little
>you lewd fucker
>she pissed like a racehorse
>for almost a minute straight she quenched the dry dirt beneath her shivering in bouts of relief
>you watched her tail strain and ache as it struggled to flag for such a long period of time
>she pinned her ears especially as more cars continued to pass by
>with a heavy sigh she finished up, too embarrassed to talk or even quip you with some sarcastic vocabulary
>instead she clambered back up through the van door without a peep
>dawning you shirt again you note the massive dark patch on earth and quickly return to the a/c of your vehicle
>snap wasn't in the passenger seat anymore when you got back in
>instead she had climbed to the back row of seats and huddled herself into a corner, a pillow clutched tightly over her head
>without a word you start the van again and merge back on to the freeway
>you'll probably never hear the end of this one
>>
>>30877724
>>30877688
forgive my Phone typinG
seriously tho I m too poor to afford a proper laptop sorry friend
>>
>>30877291
horses can't get fleas
>>
>>30877894

Learn something new everyday. How about Lice then? They're whitish as well so it makes more sense.
>>
>>30877735
>>snap wasn't in the passenger seat anymore when you got back in
>>instead she had climbed to the back row of seats and huddled herself into a corner, a pillow clutched tightly over her head
how adorable
>>
>>30877894
>>30877928

Apparantly the reason horses can't get fleas is because they don't have a den or nest or typical place they return to to sleep. So with Celestia being in a cage for a a while, sleeping on a dirty rag for a bed, it doesn't seem too far outside the realm of possibility.
>>
>>30877501
Pony wears the saddle
Pony pulls the wagon
>>
>>30877966
Domesticated horses are kept stalled, in some cases for up to 16 hours a day, and they still don't get fleas. They're not good hosts for fleas; the width and density of their hair isn't the same as dogs and cats for one thing. Fleas have a difficult time sticking to them as a result.

Horses don't get fleas.

>source: been a horse owner for 20 years
>>
>>30878079
Hi swf.
>>
>>30878079
>Implying ponies have normal horse hair and not denser, softer more fluffy hart.
>>
>>30878316
>.> hart
>>
>>30877760
There are decent bluetooth keyboards on ebay or aliexpress, just get whatever. I was using a third party kb from old ipad with my cheap android tablet for almost a year, that crappy thing was just skies above touchscreen typing. And I even got it for free since dude drowned his ipad beyond repair.
>>
>>30878684

I write on an ipad, using the touch screen. I actually find it slightly easier than typing on a PC or laptop, partly due to the predictive texting and auto correct, and partly because I'm not quite right. You can't do shit on mobile though
>>
https://pastebin.com/b7EwCWQj

And here is the pastebin.
>>
>>30878732
Autocorrection is not a bad idea, I am still typing faster than on a PC using my 12-button keyboard on nokia 6300 with the help of T9. But touchscreen can only make you that fast and on 8 inches you really start to consider putting it on your lap and type like on a normal kb. On android we have "hacker's keyboard" which also has full layout, but that's still not the same. The feeling of pressing a button is so much supreme even on a tablet. I have so much struggle with 5inch phone now that my tabled went to Valhalla.
>>
>>30878766
I suppose it's just personal preference, as I said I'm not quite right.
>>
>>30877735
Poor little poner needs some cheering up.
>>
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>all this talk about typing proficiency
>proper punctuation and grammar
>recommendations so that people can improve and not make mistakes
>in the thread where Twilight is routinely misspelled as "Twiligth"
What, is today soul crushing irony day or something?
>>
>>30879021
No its just soul crushing for me.
>>
>>30879021
How quickly people tend to forget that /mlp/ is /b/ for ponytards. What's wrong with discussing tools which improve greentexting?
>>
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>>>>>>>using proper grammerrr spelling and pubnctuation on 4chin
>>>>>>>>>>>>notjust jacking off with your right hanbd while you ytpe with yourr left
>>
>>30878316
Love this picture

Cuddles story of adorable pegasus "daughter" when?
>>
>>30879832
Making porn here.
>>
>>30879099
BIG
MILK FILLED
TITTIES
>>
>Blessed with two sunhorse stories, one warm and cute while the other feelsy and hard-hitting
Dayum. What did we do to deserve this? This is fantastic!

>>30866681
Good on Anon for recognizing he's been kind of underestimating the sheer scale of the task he's taken on; Celestia is not a 'stray cat' and taking her in has heavier implications than he had been really ready to expect. Perhaps once she is fully recovered, they can sit down and have a real talk about the future too...

>>30873283
Okay, wow. Still going full ahead with those one-two sucker punches of feels!

I'm not sure if you're taking a slower, more steady approach to explaining things here and will address these in the future, but there were a few points here that you might want to think about in the future: For instance, why exactly was she so utterly terrified of washing? Something that happened before? Was she always washed up before she was 'used'?

Also, at times Celestia seems to alternate between fully-lucid and totally drugged out just a bit to quickly (in my eyes, anyhow) - she's gone from being completely lost in it to largely able to communicate and no longer showing her drugged-up "ticks" in a single section.

Of course, again you may have a plan for these. Please, don't let this discourage you - by all means continue writing!

>>30872980
How have I not seen this before? I love this image!
>TFW no sunhorse to go out driving in the country with
>>
>>30842875
>>30843896

"I..."
> Your tongue seems leaden, throat swollen shut again.
> How could you tell her?
> How could you expose her to this misery?
> Flurry Heart's future was supposed to be one of warmth, kindness, safety, and shelter for all ponies around her.
> Not a harsh existence of regrets for those she could not save.
> Moaning softly, you squeeze your eyes shut and flick your ears down and back - ignoring another panicked call from your daughter.
> "Momma?!"
> Anonymous had said he wanted her to lead another camp eventually.
> Would she face the same horrors you were?
> Again your stomach contorts.
> Even if he waited for her to be grown, a young pony should not have that kind of weight on her back!
> "Momma! What's wrong?!"
> For the briefest moment your eyes flick open - just long enough to see them both looking at you, eyes wide and concerned.
> A brief burst of anger sweeps through you:
> Anger at Anonymous for bringing your daughter into this.
> How dare he?
> What demanded that he destroy a filly's innocence, her belief in her mother?
> He had done this once before - told her you had been a bad pony.
> Preyed on her wholehearted belief that what her Master told her was the absolute, uncorruptible truth.
> And on your visceral need for your daughter's approval.
> Or was this anger at your own inability to admit that you could not explain this?
> That you were blindly flailing in the dark, seeking some way to lead your ponies that did not involve subjecting them to punishments?
"Flurry, I..."
> Suddenly she is there on the bed, right in front of you, rearing up on her hind legs with a few beats of her broad wings to reach for your neck.
> Little hooves slip around your neck and a muzzle buries itself against your shoulders, just below where the collar encircles your throat.
> You want to hug her, but even if your hooves were not shackled together you doubt there is enough strength left in your legs to do so.
>>
>>30880777

> Instead what comes out is veritable tsunami of words:
"Oh, Flurry Heart - I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry. I never meant to leave you - oh, Harmony forgive me, I never meant it! I didn't want to-"
> Bending even further up, Flurry Heart brushes her nose against your jaw.
> "Were you a bad pony, Momma?"
> Again your heart flips and stomach wrenches at the sheer sadness in her voice.
"Yes."
> Whispering softly, you droop your head - letting Flurry Heart continue nuzzling into your cheek.
"I left you out there, in the cold without me, let you be captured and taken and I should have been there to stop them-"
> All your tears had been spent, but somehow you a fresh sob finds its way up from your throat.
"-and now, now I tried to go back to fighting Anonymous because I just wanted things to be so easy for me again, even if other ponies were getting hurt. And I know it was wrong, I know I shouldn't have, but I wanted him to hurt me so badly just so I could be angry at him again, and-"
> Clamping her legs around your neck again, your daughter whimpers:
> "Please don't be a bad pony, Momma. Please don't hate Master. I don't want him to go away."
"But I left you! I let you be taken by them, let you be left to rot and starve and if I had been there-"
> For just a second, she seems to hesitate.
> Then her answer comes:
> "But I'm here now. You're here now. I'm not hungry, and I'm not alone. And Anonymous doesn't hurt me. He even-"
> She shoots a questioning look at your owner, who nods an affirmative.
> Leaning in, Flurry drops her voice to an almost conspiratorial whisper:
> "-he even spanked Mistress Megan for being mean to the other ponies!"
> Despite the fierce pain you still feel, a little laugh manages its way to your lips.
"Truly?"
> "Uh-huh. Right in front of Thunderlane too! So Momma - please don't make him hurt you too. Please?"
> Damn Anonymous.
> Damn him to Tartarus for all eternity!
> How dare he use your daughter against you like this?
>>
>>30880783

> But you cannot deny the reality of what you feel.
> Lifting your head, you please a soft kiss on Flurry Heart's muzzle.
"I won't be a bad pony, Little Gem. I promise, I won't."
> After a moment Anonymous' hand touches your shoulder.
> "Do you want to wash up, Cadance?"
"Yes, I... I think I'd like that very much."
> "Here. Show me your hooves?"
> You do, and he separates the shackles to hold a shortly length of hobbling chain between both fore and hind hooves.
> Enough to awkwardly shuffle with, if not truly walk freely.
> "Do I need to go with you?"
"No, I think I will manage on my own."
> The limiter on your horn, at least, had been removed; with hooves shackled your magic would still allow you to shower.
> Even the collar and bridle were... manageable.
> Being forced to limp about in chains was humiliating enough; you were not going to allow him to wash you like a foal!
> As a bonus, washing up gave you a few minutes alone to collect your thoughts.
> Scorching water cascades off your back, easing out knots in muscles driven in by your torturous experience.
> Your eyes close again, submerging your head in the cleansing flow.
> In retrospect, of course, it seems the ravings of a madmare.
> How could you have ever wanted to go back?
> The allure of simpler times hid a poisonous bite.
> No.
> You had to forge ahead.
> Somehow.
> Again you cast a silent wish that Shining Armor was here.
> While your destiny might be to spread love, his relentless drive and sense of justice balanced you perfectly.
> But he was gone - another casualty of slavery.
> You must face this alone-
> Lost in your thoughts, you suddenly find yourself tumbling - a clatter of hooves against porcelain tile as you slip on the slick floor.
> Instinctively you try and reach out and steady yourself on spread hooves, only for the hobbling chains to catch and still-weak muscles to fail you, bringing you the rest of the way to the floor in an ungainly sprawl.
>>
>>30880798

> Stupid filly; what were you doing?!
> This is no time to be losing track of your own-
> "Cadance? Is everything okay?"
> Your cheeks heat, tail clamping down over your haunches.
> Now it was a debasing, ungainly sprawl as Anonymous peered in with a worried expression.
"Yes, I'll be fine. I just - just need to -"
> Damn these chains!
> Before you can get yourself upright, he is already at the edge of the shower area - reaching in to grab the head from its mount and bring it down to your level.
> "No, just stay there Cadance."
"You'll get wet!"
> "A little. I'll manage."
> Anonymous' tone suggests there is going to be no argument about this, and part of you wonders if that had been his plan all along.
> Kneeling beside you, he pauses just long enough to roll up his sleeves before going to work.
> As the first layers of soap are worked into your coat, you wonder how long it had been since someone had last done this.
> Certainly some of your past owners had staff responsible for bathing you.
> But their work had always been distant somehow, even when they primped and preened you as a polished trophy.
> Professional.
> Whatever his reasons Anonymous was now putting actual, real effort into this - fingers digging deep into your coat, working their way along your bands of muscle as he continues to soap you up.
> He was... forceful, but not harsh.
> Not rough.
> And to your eternal shame you can't help but find yourself enjoying the treatment some.
> Your wings unfold, drooping lazily out to either side - something he takes immediate advantage of, working in a touch of soap along the muscled limbs that support the spans of feathers.
> Shackles, collar, and bridle are all deftly worked around too, fingers digging beneath to send a small shiver down your spine.
> That truly did feel good, and-
> "Roll on your side? I need to get at your underside."
> Oh.
> Right.
>>
>>30880803

> Old shame reasserts itself as you carefully tuck your tail in between your haunches, preserving your modesty while he works.
> Not that it helps much.
> There is still something profoundly vulnerable, something intimate, in rolling over to expose your belly to him.
> As if you needed a reminder that you were ultimately his property and subject to his orders.
> Was this somehow his revenge for your slip of the tongue earlier - reminding him that he was ultimately still your master, not a friend?
> Or somehow how he hoped to show affection?
> Sometimes he truly was an enigma to you.
> "Okay, stand up again? I'm going to rinse you off now."
"One moment."
> More carefully this time, you stand - careful not to overstress your weakened muscles again.
> Taking the showerhead again Anonymous sets it to a heavier spray setting and begins rinsing out all the soap he'd worked in, and you once again close your eyes and simply enjoy the impact of water against your coat.
> It was like a massage in its own way, and simply being able to stand there and enjoy...
> This was a luxury you had not had in a long time.
> As the soap runs out it almost seems to leave your coat feeling lighter, dried sweat from your... experience in the cell earlier washing away.
> Cathartic, almost.
> The last remnants of your mistake going down the drain.
> And-
> Reality comes crashing back as the spray goes up under your tail, sending a jolt of entirely different sensations through your body.
> He had not asked to do that!
> Wings snap out for entirely different reasos as you jolt upright with a small gasp, but the moment is already passed.
> What is not passed is the sharp heating of your cheeks.
> Relaxed as you were, your tail must have come untucked and Anonymous took the moment to... wash off there.
> You don't think he saw anything, and the brief touch of water had been perfunctory and brief.
> But still...
>>
>>30880810

> Head drooping, you hide your still-flushed cheeks in the cascading fall of your mane while he finishes up.
> "All done. Do you need help drying off?"
"No. I will manage."
> This time you put as much effort as you can into the statement.
> Just in case he had any ideas; you needed some time alone to let that unwanted moment pass.
> "Alright. I'll be waiting outside."
> As soon as he is gone, you quickly dry yourself with one of Anonymous' towels.
> Relishing the almost cloudlike softness - you were so lucky to receive them once they were worn and thin.
> Most of the camp's linens were far cheaper cloths.
> The second you step from the bathroom, you stop still at the scene before you.
> Anonymous had Flurry Heart stretched across his lap, a brush in his hand.
> Wings unfolded in twin sprawling fans - a sign of utter relaxation - Flurry barely raises her head as you enter.
> Too delighted by the way Anonymous has been regularly drawing a brush through her mane and coat.
> Sighing gently, you take the brush in your magic.
"You can't brush her mane straight; it won't ever stay that way. You have to curl it."
> "Show me?"
> Carefully clambering up onto the bed, you settle prone onto your belly and stretch out your forelegs.
"Flurry? Come here, Little Gem?"
> Sparing a nervous glance at the shackles, Flurry settles across your slender legs.
> Soon she lulled back to a state of utter relaxation by the repeated passes of your brush.
> Unbidden, an old lullaby you'd once sung to her amid gleaming, crystalline halls comes to your lips.
> At first as only a soft hum, but then more as some lyrics begin to return.
> A warmth begins to flood your heart, but also a pain.
> The last time this had been sung, there had been another at your side too.
> You can almost feel Shining's presence there with you.
>>
>>30880817

> Hear his soft if occasionally off-tune singing, feel his warmth beside you, smell his scent - the strong tones of a stallion, but also the slightest hint of oil and steel.
> Even so, the song only falters once:
> When Anonymous begins to brush your own mane.
> Only a momentary pause though, and soon you resume - your own eyelids growing heavy as the brushing sends fresh, tingling sensations through your scalp.
> At a certain point you realize you have begun to run on instinct alone:
> Humming wordlesssly as you brushed your daughter long after she had fallen asleep, as Anonymous had kept doing the same to you.
> Setting the brush down, you gather your daughter in against your chest and lower your head to rest across her back, nickering gently at the soft touch.
> "If all of you out there are done eavesdropping-"
> Anonymous' tone is laden with amusement.
> "-perhaps it's time to get back to work?"
> For a second you are confused, until a sudden fading of scampering hooves is heard outside the door.
> Instantly you rear back up, flushing hard.
"They - they heard me-"
> "Oh, don't worry. You sing well."
> Still flushing, you scrunch furiously but it's an empty gesture.
"Apparently I am also a fantastic actor, if none of them saw how close I came to madness..."
> "You are. After all, you fooled me too right up until I decided to get directly involved with everything. Though, I hope you see now -"
> Reaching forward, he places a hand on Flurry's side as well.
> "-you aren't failing."
"If you do actually want me to hate you, using my own daughter against me is a very good start."
> He responds with a cocked, questioning eyebrow and you sigh heavily.
"But your point is made. I was... a foalish pony."
> "Extremely."
> Another pause, and then:
>>
>>30880823

> "Cadance... don't ever do that to me again. Remember that when it comes to a lot of this, you are my guide. If you fail, I'm left flailing about blindly... and I don't always make the best choices. I know how to plan, how to manage, and how to enforce. I'm still learning how to lead."
> Then what right, you wonder, does he have to hold you as his chattel?
> But those words remain safely behind your lips, unsaid.
> Instead, you change the topic:
> Glancing down at the filly still asleep in your hooves, you sigh softly.
"I suppose she will have to go back soon..."
> "For today, yes. But there'll be more chances later on, and..."
> Pausing to consider, Anonymous suddenly nods decisively.
> "Another night, she - and Megan - can stay up here as well."
"I..."
> You glance back at your hooves - weighing the desire of seeing your daughter for longer against the cost of yet another seeing you in chains, collar, and bridle.
> In the end, though, it is really no contest.
"I would like that very much, if she could."
> "I'll arrange it."
> Nickering and brushing her back with the tip of your muzzle one last time, you lift Flurry up to Anonymous.
> He vanishes through the doors with her, but returns before too long.
> In that time, though, you've come to another decision.
"I can't go back out right now. Not just because of this-"
> You raise a hoof to indicate the shackle still locked around it, and by extension the bridle and collar.
"-but I'm too weak right now."
> "I know. You'll stay the night."
"Thank y-"
> "Longer than a night, actually. Cadance, I'm taking you off leadership duty for a while."
"What?!"
> Stirred by your outburst, Flurry Heart shifts against your chest.
> Waiting until she is still again, you hiss in a softer voice:
"You can't take me away from them-"
> "I can and I will, Cadance. If I send you right back out there, you'll be liable to crack again. And like I just said, I can't have that."
"Then who will lead them?"
>>
>>30880830

> "You said it yourself - things are more stable at the moment; Mayor Mare can manage some, and I will learn as well. I might even consult you, but you need time without stress."
"No convincing you otherwise, I sense."
> "Cadance, I will shackle you to the God-damn bed if that's what it takes to keep you from burning yourself out."
> Your muzzle wrinkles again.
"...let us avoid that, please."
> "Agreed. Besides, Flurry needs flying lessons once your strength returns and there are other matters at hand..."

Section for this arc, and then we move on! Unortunately, this once again means that there's no major choice here; the next bit will shift to a different character and give us a chance to move our perspective back to the camp. Feedback both in general and on the handling of this arc is, of course, appreciated.
>>
>>30880844
Just a quick comment before bigger commentary (Because boy I have a lot)

>> Nickering and brushing her back with the tip of your muzzle one last time, you lift Flurry up to Anonymous.
> He vanishes through the doors with her, but returns before too long.
This line seems to indicate that Cadance gave Flurry back to Anonymous to return to her/Megan's room? but then this line

>"What?!"
> Stirred by your outburst, Flurry Heart shifts against your chest.
> Waiting until she is still again, you hiss in a softer voice:
This line seems to imply she is still resting on Cadance's hooves. Was there a mistake in here or am misreading?
>>
>>30880928
Motherfucker. This is the result of a last-second rewrite which had some stuff moved around. I thought I'd fixed all of that, I guess not. Your are correct - he left the room with her earlier.
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>>30881026
AH, I see. Personally would have gone for letting her hold on to Flurry for as long as possible, the brief minutes she gets to spare with her daughter only to need to have her taken away or herself removed is weighing on heavily with this latest trauma. But, I guess the original punishment is still in effect or either Anonymous/Cadance/both see the negative effect in letting Flurry see her mother in chains like this (though, if I may also ask: is there a reason he didn't remove them before she took a shower, is it strictly because of this latest punishment insisting they stay on until Anonymous feels he and Cadance are clear?)
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>>30880783
>> How dare he use your daughter against you like this?

Candance has to fix her Ego problems, the world does not revolve around her damnit!
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>>30880803
>> He was... forceful, but not harsh.
>> Not rough.
this is lewd as fuck onii-chan. I love it.
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>>30880844
So she's anon's personal cuddle mare for the next week right? right?
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Can someone spoiler me the slaveventure main thing? Cannot decide what to read next and have only this much free time. It looks like that santa-barbara is never going to end, but dudes seem to read it and I want to know.
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>>30881377
Like, a few sentence general descriotion or a loose summary of everything that's happened in the story up to this point?
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>>30881584
Something in between. Wtf is going on and where it is, and who's the center of attention last 2-3 posts. I hear about Cadence much, is she main slave character?
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>>30880777
Fuck I'm giddy. I've been waiting all week for this update.

>Cadance's response
Perfectly IC I think to have her being more or less incapable of explaining this to her daughter. Her desire to see herself punished as retribution for her failures, as well as what appears to be some innate desire to go back to the way things were between her and Anon when it were simpler (didn't read into this particular part myself, though it makes sense). I loved when she leaped up into her mothers neck to hug her while Cadance herself was incapable of moving a muscle to return the favor.

Her anger at Anonymous is certainly understandable too. As brought up specifically this isn't the first time he's worked to destroy Cadance's image in front of her daughter, and now she's actually forced to admit she's been a bad pony. It must be incredibly degrading, even if she weren't forced into chains/collar/bridle in front of her, I can't imagine what effect that might have later. I think hitting her with Flurry was appropriate to truly send the message home, but maybe it wouldn't have hurt to at least wait until she was out of those. I can understand striking while the iron is hot though.

>The bath scene
I'm still a bit perplexed as to why she had to keep on chains/collar for this, it seems like that would make it a clear safety hazard especially given her weakened limbs. Though it did at least lead to a heart-felt scene of Anon showing his more caring sign for Cadance. If not everything else in this segment hasn't been evidence enough, scrubbing her down carefully and brushing her hair was a clear indicator he wants to be more than just a Master to her (which I still imagine is how she'll see their relationship so long as he holds her in chains)
(1/2)
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>>30881700
>>30880844
>Ending
Again wish we could have let Cadance keep Flurry for a bit longer, maybe even nap with her, but what we got was adorable between brushing her hair and singing to her. Just, again, I hope it was worth it all despite still being chained up in front of her. I wonder if Flurry still feels more comfortable in Anon's lap than she does in her mother's, that I hope they get into a bit when she finally has more time to spend with her properly.

Also, could see the ending coming with Anon insisting Cadance take a few days off even if he has to chain her down, she's had it coming for a while to finally relieve some stress. I'm curious to see what Thunderlane / Anon get up to in the meanwhile but I hope we get to come back to Cadance during some of that free time as well to see what she does with it.
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>>30880604

Cheers for the feedback. Yup, you guessed it. There is a reason. However, my aim with this story is to let things unfold naturally on their own. To show and not to tell, even if it keeps the reader guessing at some things. It shows I still have a ways to go if its still a bit murky atm.

I can definitely see what you mean by bouncing back and forth too much. This was a more creative decision on my end to drop the realism level a tiny bit for the sake of writing a more engaging story. I feel that 6000 words of more feral drugged up Celestia with no dialogue interaction would have been boring, or even monotonous if you will. Thanks for the input, and I'll definitely take those points into consideration.
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>>30881985
>However, my aim with this story is to let things unfold naturally on their own.
Nah, that's fine. "Show, don't tell" is a very good lesson in writing and I'm glad that you're going with it.

>I feel that 6000 words of more feral drugged up Celestia with no dialogue interaction would have been boring, or even monotonous if you will.
This is... trickier. I see what you mean, and it's not easy to communicate with one of the characters being non-verbal. It demands a lot of focus on body language and behavior, plus nonverbal sounds where you can fit them in. If you feel up to it, I might suggest playing around with this a bit more - perhaps having her speak, but not always coherently and showing a bit more of her broken/"trained" behavior. Then again, given that she's advanced this far already, reverting back might also be jarring at this point. Maybe something to revisit when you get around to having her detoxed.
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>>30881377
Story centers on Cadence and Thunderlane as slaves, and Anon as the owner.

Anon is a millionaire that used most of his funds to set up a work camp next to his mansion, and the workforce of ~1000 ponies. His idea is that it was retarded to have them in shackles and magic suppressors and doing manual labor only. Instead, he could make use of their special talents whenever possible to take advantage of their inherent skill in some things, produce unique items for market, and use manual labor as a last resort. Chef ponies are all cooks, pegasi are making cloud-stuffing for pillows, unicorns are putting simple enchantments that repel mosquitoes, etc etc. Anon still treats them like slaves, but life in this camp is far better than other workcamps would ever be.

Cadence was bought to be the manager of the camp. A pony they would naturally look up to and obey. Anon wants ponies to mostly govern themselves. Both to make them feel a little closer to their old way of life and thus remain complacent, and so they'd be less likely to rebel against their ownership. She's doing fairly well in that respect, but she's being forced into a role that she thinks she isn't prepared for and keeps comparing herself to Celestia, and all she sees is her own failure. Hence the last few updates.

Thunderlane cares about the camp staying safe and secure, of course, but mostly he's worried about his little brother, Rumble. To keep Rumble safe and to give him as best life as he can, Thunderlane is willingly giving up his moral fiber by working much closer with Anon than he's required to, and is torn about relinquishing his horse-humanity in his role as (essentially) a traitor to all ponykind.

Now filter that description through a multi-month CYOA, tons of discussion between updates, a LOT of emotional conflict, gray morality, and character development.
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>>30882179
Pretty accurate, yeah. For a loose roundup of some of the more major character arcs:
>Story begins with Cadance pulling off a decently-sized escape attempt, after which Anonymous reveals he has managed to buy Flurry Heart and basically strongarms Cadance into cooperating with him to keep her safe
>They've all had to deal with various problems since:
>Rebel groups in the camp, ranging from quietly planning a future escape contingency to vandalism to violence like beating up Anonymous' personal maid
>Last one turned into a shitshow where even the other rebels were turning over the more violent ones.
>Two of the ponies responsible got sold off to bad place, one committed suicide to avoid it, and one turned on the others and got sold off to an owner known to be decent
>Anonymous trying to bring in outside investors, who sent someone (Randall) to oversee things. Randall had a pony assistant too (Haute Glamour) who turned out to be a conniving cunt and tried to overthrow us
>Thunderlane trying to balance protecting the camp's ponies from abuse and enforcing Anonymous' rules, while protecting Rumble from getting mixed up in rebellion himself
>Cadance is struggling to deal with her primary task turning from opposing Anonymous to actually having to work on his behalf and punish ponies, even when they don't always deserve it
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>>30870026
Did I go overboard with this or was it just a missed update?
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>>30880844
Lots to do on the one hand Anon should visit back to Mocha to check their status and whether it can be served in the mansion, talk to Randall and investment partners for the purpose of getting them more favorable terms for your project, I'm pretty sure they wanted Anon failed to wrest the entire operation and that more than one will now be furious that Anon was freed of all charges of abuse and murder by researchers and small plot Hautte Glamor has been discovered. Know that it would be funny? To anon acquire a Hautte but had it working in the new field, under the authority and supervision of his former victims ponies, with a magic limiter and a muzzle for anyone to hear more of his lies, working in the field as a donkey and forced to pay for the money spent in buying

Now Anon must return to campaign and inform both the administrative and security personnel of the temporary absence of Candance of duty and in his absence everyone should do their part to keep the boat afloat, it must remain outside taking everything she handled daily, at the same time must confront the rebels ponies that could absence princess to promote conflict against authority, after a visit to the clinic to inform mellowheart thanks to her research was positive and offer increase supplies and perhaps expand the site and improve medical instruments.

And ultimately, look at the museum to ascertain the beneficial impact that this offers the pony community and perhaps pay a visit to Vapor Trail and asked about the status of your baby or Midnight in workshops and maintain a bittersweet encounter with the old rebel filly
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Bump
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>>30882960
>Vapor Trail

More of sweetest mare plz
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Decided to just finish the chapter and then post what I got. Not sure why but here's a 30% increase in story length. Last update was end of chapter 4.

+++5+++

>”Well, I’ll be damned. You sure are a hell of a fast learner.” The Major scratched his head in confusion, dropping his clipboard on the table in front of him. “We’ve still got three days set aside for lessons, and you’ve already completed everything on the list, even the stretch goals.”
“It’s what I do best,” I replied, giving him and Chuck a playful grin.
>”Guess we gotta do more field exercises then, sir?” the stallion asked, hopeful to get out of the stuffy little office where classes had been held.
>”I suppose it’s our only option. There’s some decent training sites around here. I’m sure we can make something happen.”
>It had been a busy ten days. They’d crammed a truly enormous amount of information, from basic military tactics to first aid, weapons functions, and even some fresh pony-specific strategies Chuck had helped to develop in the field. But my infallible ability to absorb information won out again, and by the close of that tenth day I’d already finished every test and objective they’d been given.
>During that time, my initial impressions of the crew cemented. Wilcox, if anything, grew even more bitter with his situation as he fostered an acceptance for it. Jewel was chatty and kind, but quick to offend. Chuck was withdrawn, brash, yet still willing to partake in conversation and take part in our joint activities. Lopez continued to be quiet and kind, generally only speaking if something positive could come of his words. And Major Johnson was almost like a movie actor trying to play the role of a leader. But I’ll be damned if he wasn’t good at it.
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>>30883820
>After re-reading my spellbook volumes twice over, I finally relented and asked Lopez if anything in our budget could be spared for entertainment. To my surprise, not only was there a specific budget for entertainment, but I’d been the only one thus far not to tap into it. And so, I rediscovered the internet, albeit in a much broader, far less censored form than I’d been prior accustomed to. Of course, it enraptured me in my spare time. Such quantities of information could not be matched even by the Royal Archives in Equestria.
>Briefly, I was amazed that so little restriction had been placed on us ponies. We were free to move about the facility, do as we pleased in our quarters, have contact with the outside world (under pseudonyms and anonymity, of course), and even take sick days. But those thoughts were quickly rationalized by the barriers, physical or otherwise, that prevented our leaving the compound. We may have been free to roam about our cell block, but we were prisoners nonetheless.
>But now, though, an opportunity had arisen where we might finally go somewhere and do something. Field exercise or not, I was eager for any opportunity to vacate the compound. Apparently, the change of scenery had allowed me to go restless and inquisitive of the world once more. I considered it a sign of my old self returning.
>”If we did that, though,” the commander mulled, “we’d have to bring everyone with us. Think we can afford to leave the place empty for a few days?”
“I think the others are pretty much done with their tasks,” I said, likely echoing the others’ thoughts.
>”Maybe see how the team does in the field, eh?” he asked rhetorically, clapping his hands together. “If I can’t get something in at Camp Navajo or something, I’ve got about a hundred acres of desert an hour southeast. We can go out there and tool around a bit.”
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>>30883827
>”Anything to get out of here,” Chuck mumbled.
>”I agree. Twilight, Chuck, tell the others we’re heading out tomorrow morning. Not too early, maybe eleven hundred hours, but they’ll want to pack some overnight gear.”
>He soon dismissed us, leaving us free to mull over and distribute the news. It was more of a time-kill than anything else, but perhaps some valuable insights could be had from the experience. Regardless, it would doubtless be exciting to once again truly be out in the open, away from the restricting confines of walls and fences. A bit of relatively unrestricted flight would also probably do the old bones some good.
>Any pegasus would struggle to maintain physique in my confines. In the research facility, I was, until the end of my tenure, denied regular exercise opportunities. But I am no ordinary pegasus. Alicorn magic is not bestowed lightly – those touched by it remain eternally youthful and healthy, in addition to great power politically and magically. My muscles remained firm, my flanks maintained thinness, and my body kept free of disease. It would take serious effort to kill me, and no wound short of that would hold forever. Alicorns had died in times past, sure. It simply did not happen often.
>But evidently, I’d not been entirely spared from injury at the hands of humanity, if my mental state was any proper indicator. Those ten days had been difficult at times, as the colors of the world returned to my eyes and I could once again feel the broad range of emotions so generously bestowed upon ponies of all sorts. Perhaps it was the stress of self-consciousness of this fact, or perhaps simply stress from the emotions themselves, but nevertheless my sudden breakdown repeated itself twice over in that ten-day period. Thankfully, I was alone during both occurrences, and I doubt my companions thought me any worse because of them.
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>>30883830
>Reactions to our trip varied per person and pony. Wilcox, as usual, responded cynically: “Old bastard probably just wants an excuse to go out on his land and shoot government ammo.” Jewel and Lopez were pleased, and seemed to want a chance to stretch their legs just as much as I did.
>Wilcox’s judgement of the commander’s motivations may, in reality, have been somewhere close to the truth of the matter. It wasn’t long before the commander reappeared to us to inform us of our destination: his private tract of land, roughly an hour south of the city and another half-hour along rural roads. There would be neither shelter nor shade, the undeveloped desert being as it is, and thus we would each have to bring our own shelter. Ultimately, all but Jewel and I opted to forgo a tent in favor of a simple one-man sunshade. But neither of us intended to sleep in those confining, heat-trapping houses of plastic. They would merely function for a bit of privacy and storage in the company of a majority-male delegation.
>Dinner that night was had together, and it was decidedly livelier than I’d grown accustomed to. We’d only been here for a week and a half, yet only Lopez had spent more than a few hours beyond the outer fence. The Major vowed to schedule more time for off-site pursuits, recreational or otherwise.
>Sleep came equally easily for me. No screens or spellbooks would wrap themselves around my mind that night: instead, I headed straight for my sheets, eager to enjoy them for the last time in several days. Even the typical troubles in my dreams were replaced by decidedly happier, more hopeful predictions of my prospects on this little excursion.
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>>30883843
>The morning carried with it ample time for hygiene, packing, and preparation. With little else to do, I simply killed time until our late-morning set-out time. I briefly considered requesting to fly alongside the vehicle once we left the city, but reasoned it was probably best not to push my boundaries. I’d likely have ample opportunity to stretch my wings once we arrived at our destination.
>Even at our vehicle’s relatively fast pace, the city’s size proved as unnavigable as it was intimidating. It took over an hour to reach the end of the city, the highway finally opening up onto flat, wide desert interrupted at various points by ancient, long-dead volcanoes. The plant life was ample, yet provided no measurable shade from the sun. Cacti and brush did a poor job at providing respite from that soulless, magicless source of heat.
>Roughly three hours after we set out, our heavily-laden truck finally arrived at the end of the road. There was nothing to set the property apart from the surrounding landscape but a slight widening of the dirt path, forming a makeshift parking space. The land was almost entirely flat, save for a small mountain to the west of our entry point. That would be our campsite, the major announced, and we each prepared our packs for the hike over.
>What would otherwise have been a rather difficult journey in the midday heat was considerably bettered by my spellwork. Quick weight-reduction spells eliminated any strain from our packs, a simple magic cloud overhead provided comfortable shade, and a heat absorption sphere above each of us helped keep us cool. Harsh desert climes had turned to arid but temperate steppe around us by my horn.
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>>30883851
>We arrived at our campsite as the sun was starting to set. It wasn’t a difficult site to spot: it had serviced one group or another quite a few times, as evidenced by its large, charcoal-black bonfire pit and smattering of broken glass bottles. We quickly set up our tents and tarps to face perpendicular to its still-bright rays, and set to reigniting the firepit, albeit in a smaller form.
>It had been a long time since I’d had proper campfire food, and I was excited for the chance at such a meal. The humans opted to cook tubes of heavily-processed meat affectionately dubbed “hot dogs” over the open flame, while the rest of us subsisted that night almost entirely on marshmallows and chocolate. While it may not have been the healthiest meal, I was a happy mare for its gooey deliciousness.
“It’s been so long since I’ve had a proper camping expedition,” I commented contentedly, not bothering to wipe the chocolate smudges from my face. “Even in Equestria, I didn’t get the chance too often. I’m glad we did this.”
>”S’mores are better than MRE’s,” Chuck muttered in agreement.
>”Don’t get too attached to them,” Lopez chuckled. “You three have already worn through pretty much all we have. We’re probably looking at MRE’s for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.”
>”Aren’t you the supply guy?” Wilcox asked, jesting. “The hell, man? We’re out of dogs, too.”
>”I’m sure you’d love nothing more than to stuff your face with weiners,” Lopez responded, prompting the man to roll his eyes in exasperation. “But hey, it’s my job to make sure we’re not shitting bricks tomorrow, too. MRE’s at least have some balance in ‘em.”
>”Bullshit, you always trade for desserts.”
>”Hey, it’s still better than hot dogs!”
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>>30883856
“You know,” I said, slyly, “I could always just transmutate us up some meals. I mean, it’s a bit hard to turn rocks into a well-balanced breakfast, but not too much trouble for the world’s greatest spellcaster.”
>”You can do that?” the Major asked, eagerness building in his eyes as it does for a child entering a candy store.
“Just tell me what you want, I’ll make it happen,” I challenged, encouraged both by the will to please and the desire to show off.
>”Here,” Wilcox said, tossing a rock in front of him. “Make me a banana split, chocolate fudge if you can manage.”
>A tough request, to be sure, and virtually impossible for any unicorn of average magical ability. Yet I just grinned, charged my horn, and took aim at the rock. In a bright purple flash, it changed, shifting into a delicious dairy dessert. In addition, not only did it have his fudge, but also a dusting of rainbow sprinkles.
>”I…” the man said, taken aback. “I didn’t think it’d be that easy. Thanks, I guess,” he said, sheepishly taking a bite. Of course, once this little display finished, everyone else tossed a rock and a request of their own in, and soon I’d prepared a custom line of desserts to finish off our already-unhealth main courses. I could’ve run the Cakes out of business if I’d tried.
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>>30883862
>Thankfully, the exertion from our hike counteracted the extraordinary quantities of sugar we’d consumed, and sleep came relatively easily. It did not come for long, however, as the Major woke us well before dawn to get a head start on the day’s activities. We had a quick, small breakfast mainly consisting of nutrition bars, did some light stretching, and promptly headed off to a relatively cactus-free stretch of desert to conduct exercises. The pre-dawn air was cool, soothingly so, and the scrub took on an entirely new appearance with the faint purple and blue glows of unicorn magic illuminating our immediate surroundings. Aside from our footsteps, some cricket chirps, and a few hoots from an owl, scarcely a word broke the fine silence that had settled in that morning.
>With only an hour of darkness left, we didn’t have much time to practice night exercises. Nevertheless, valuable insights were gained from our strategizing. Here, magic proved especially essential, as it provided sight into dark spaces that our eyes failed to discern. Further, the need for electric lighting was almost wholly avoided thanks to diverse and powerful illumination spells. Though of course, the signature glow of magical auras would surely alert any mindful guards, so contingencies for such situations were discussed in equal measure. When the dawn finally broke, we decided to continue our exercises that evening, after sunset.
>With the sunlight finally came my first true chance to stretch my wings. Although I’d not voiced any complaint at being unable to fly, I suspect my companions had all suspected my discomfort at remaining close to the ground for such an extended period. While my urge to fly was never nearly on the level of one such as Rainbow Dash, it had certainly become a near-overriding instinct after such a long period of denial. So, with the commander’s blessing, I took flight.
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>>30883868
>It was no small relief to not stop at ten, twenty, thirty feet, and instead reach up for the clouds. To my significant disappointment, the clouds in this world were of a significantly different build than those in Equestria, lacking any solidity at all. They were merely wisps of fog collected high in the air. So, lacking a comfortable cloud perch, I instead elected to gaze upon my surroundings from a hover.
>The desert stretched for as far as the eye could see, which was no small distance thanks to the dry, lifeless air. Far off, the jarring gray lines of the interstate were visible, small dots of color breaking its monochrome appearance as travelers slowly crossed the distance from Phoenix to Tucson. I was careful not to stray too far from the group, and certainly not outside the boundaries of the Major’s land. For all I knew, there could have been some very punitive laws governing pegasus flights over private property.
>Reluctantly, I descended once more before I could be missed. While I’d been allowed free reign in the skies above, the others had taken a break, sitting and laughing at inconsequential small-talk. With me present once more, they began the next round of training exercises.
>Our line of missions was highly liable to include some number of civilians, Equestrian or otherwise. Thus, the Major was anxious to ensure we’d be prepared to deal with a variety of situations. Using himself and one of the well-trained human soldiers as civilians, he set up a variety of hostage and casualty scenarios. For the most part, it was mere review and application of concepts I’d been taught days prior, but being able to enact such strategies and correct imperfections was invaluable.
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>>30883871
>This variety of exercises persisted for hours, until the sun was past its meridian and our bellies rumbled for sustenance. The Major insisted on unaltered MRE’s, claiming their nutritional value to be more important than any taste modifications I could provide. Reluctantly, we dug into meals decidedly less enjoyable than those from the night prior.
>After lunch, a new round of activities was laid out. These were aimed at identifying where magic and flight could most effectively enhance teamwork and potential. The ability to climb skyward of course proved indispensable for reconnaissance and target identification purposes, but also became apparent as an easy and effective casualty and hostage movement technique when coupled with my magic. Jewel was also somewhat skilled in magical application, although far less studied and powerful than I. The humans seemed content to relegate her to a support role, working with simple spells in stressful or urgent situations. The final unicorn in our lineup, Chuck, was unfortunately less well-endowed in magical ability, and could provide little more than simple levitation as assistance. Still, this assisted him greatly in no small number of tasks, even sometimes giving him an edge over his fingered counterparts.
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>>30883876
>Not eager to tire us too much before resuming low-light training after dusk, the Major instead gave us a few hours to rest and relax before our meal. While the others napped and chatted, I took the time to continue studying my spellbooks and look for further real-world applications of their contents. So many new spells had been created in these tomes alone that I could find ample combinations, enchantments, and casting methods entirely unknown to even Equestria’s greatest scholars thanks to an impossibly-expanded base of magical knowledge. The relentless machine of capitalistic profit-seeking seemed inexhaustible in its ability to make the most of Earth’s newest source of labor, and I was at least thankful for its ability to succeed where traditional scholasticism and spell-creation research had failed.
>Of particular use was a trap of sorts I created. Combining two spells into one broadly-applying enchantment, virtually any object could be imbued with spells in mere seconds. Traps that would normally require lengthy periods of rune-etching and enchanting were reduced to mere trivialities. More, the applicable spells were of a wide variety, and everything from simple confusion and binding hexes to decidedly more lethal incantations were at my disposal.
>These traps were demonstrated at dinnertime, solidly impressing even the ever-cynical Wilcox. While complex, the spells required little inherent magical strength, and so it was decided that time would be taken to teach the technique to both Chuck and Jewel. But that would have to wait for tomorrow, as dinner was rapidly approaching and we had other plans for the night.
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>>30883882
>This time, the Major allowed me a bit more freedom to modify our meals. Instead of the trading and discarding that typically occurred with MRE’s, undesirable items were simply transmutated into something more palatable. It did please me so to hear their praise and thanks as putrid packages of preserved potatoes promptly became properly prepared puddings and desserts. Horrific alliterations aside, dinner satisfied, but was soon but a distant memory as our attention shifted to resumed nighttime training.
>Although our magic could do a great deal in total darkness, only enchantments failed to produce the glowing, highly visible auras inherent in our abilities. Thus, we focused on using gear and enchantments alone, for times when the glow of magic could wholly compromise our mission. Here we found an excellent confluence of cutting-edge technology and far older magical skills. Inexplicably expensive night-vision goggles allowed us to see distinct heat outlines of virtually everything in the desert, living or not. Sound amplifiers, imbued with the latest advances in humanity’s pre-packaged magic technology, allowed us to detect every minute whisper around us and pinpoint the location of each. And, finally, the remarkable heads-up displays conveyed an extraordinary breadth of information at all times, each individual’s device custom-tailored to specific roles, abilities, and responsibilities. Mine, predictably, focused around enchantments and passive spells.
>After a long day, we were thankfully allowed a generous period of respite. Wake-up and breakfast the next morning was late, and spirits were high after days of successful activities and entertainment. Even Wilcox seemed ready to break from his brittle shell, laughing and conversing even with the ponies.
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>>30883888
>All that remained on our itinerary were several team-building exercises, which proved decidedly less effective than the prior bouts of training. Whether it was Wilcox’s abrasiveness, Chuck’s unusual discomfort, or my own struggles with consensus, clear issues seemed to develop between individuals or the entire team. Only Lopez escaped those exercises with a seal of approval from the Major, quiet but capable as always.
>Without stopping for lunch, we broke camp and hiked back to the waiting vehicle. Soon enough, we were back on the highway, travelling back to our little facility outside the city. We passed once more through its urban areas, and these once again seemed imposing compared to the unremarkable desert I’d been inundated in for the past several days. I wanted nothing more than to stretch my wings again and soar above the cityscape, reduce its influence on my psyche. But that would have to wait for another time.
>Once we’d safely arrived back home, we quickly stowed our gear and went to bathe. Magic could clean a unicorn’s coat to some degree, but there were some functions of running water that simply could not be emulated. Luckily, the female latrine had two showers, so Jewel and I each got to wash immediately. Our male counterparts, cursed by a the same number of stalls for twice the people, could be heard arguing loudly from across the hall. I don’t imagine one even got the chance to start bathing by the time Jewel and I had finished.
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>>30883891
>Regardless, all of us save for the commander were soon present and ready for duty. That is to say, we were lazily gathered around the television, watching mundane cartoons and sitcoms. But the missing officer soon made his presence known, a stack of papers in hand. “Men, ponies, whatever else we got,” he called out from the edge of the room. “Turn that off. We got business to attend to.”
>”Oh boy, more paperwork?” Wilcox asked wearily, producing a pen from his sleeve.
>”No, numbskull,” the officer replied, batting him lightly on the head with the stack of papers. “We just got our first mission.”
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>>30883898
End update. Sorry for putting like three updates into one, but whatever. It happened. That's all of chapter 5 in one go. Pastebin: https://pastebin.com/6iL2wQNc

Do be on the lookout in this chapter and going forward for hidden foreshadowing, plot elements, character interactions, characterizations, and other concealed elements. I am taking the time to add them in intentionally, and there will be more than meets the eye at all times from now on.

Comments/concerns/feedback always appreciated. I read everything, even if I do not reply.

Some writing music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jvlUOeW_9rY
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>>30883918
>>
Biiig updates
>>
>>30882225
I hate Lightning Dust and now she is even worse. Whatever makes her suffer more.
>>
>>30882225
Just missed it.

I mean, we don't really have a choice here do we? Say yes, we go; say no, we get brainwashed and then go. May as well say yes, work on a chance to maybe turn the tables later.
>>
>>30886762
Well I was wanting to know if I simmed it or went overboard with the backstory.
>>
>>30883898
Thanks for the update! Shit I forgot to comment on the previous section so hope you don't mind if I do so now

>Jewel's background
It's good to here that despite while being used for weapons testings she did find some comrades among humans, I take it she has had better experience than Chuck. I can definitely attest to her analysis that humans, unlike ponies, are never really satisfied with what they have due to never being sure of what they're meant to do in life like ponies. I thought at first she had a negative view of Earth like Chuck at first, and maybe she still does, but she does seem more optimistic than him at least concerning the state of ponies. Though given they already determined of the 75~ million ponies stuck here, less than a third of them being in households (and thus the majority stuck in camps), I think that must just be wishful thinking that 'most' of them are okay-off.

>Twilight's reaction to Starlight/AJ
Very heart-wrenching again to see her realize that not only are her friends still alive, being made aware that she can do nothing to contact them by order of the government. I can't imagine she'll obey that mandate for too long and i'm eager to see what she thinks of her friends who have given themselves entirely over to their owner. Though a thing you mentioned in this last one: is Twilight allowed to reach out to them with an alias? Did Twilight reach out to anyone like Chuck or Jewel did?

>Training
The training / team-building excercise was pretty cool though I don't get that the team has come much closer together as a result, other than realizing Twilight makes a decent mobile snack machine (is there limits to what she can pop up? Does it actually taste good given Twilight herself is no chef?) I imagine the ponies will get along well enough but I'm still getting a wild card vibe from Chuck. The Major is my favorite of the humans because of how you described him trying his best to play a sergeant/leader from a movie.
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>>30883876
>He doesn't like MRE's
Pleb anon.
>>
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>All this Celstia content

aww yiss

But there is something that needs adressing...

If she was to become a slave, wouldn't she be more down?
I imagine her her being much more emotionally fucked up.
Blaming herself as a failure who could neither safe her race nor her sister.

something like this:
>>
>>30880844
>Don't make Master hurt you again!
Ouch. It has to hurt enough realizing you were esentially strong arming Anon into punishing you FOR you, but to hear your daughter ask it on his behalf has to be doubly painful.

I realize Anon only meant to drive home his point, but, not only is it more evidence that she may hold more affection for her savior than her own mother but she has to worry about how else Anon might use her daughter to get through to her... and when it may be for something less noble.
>>
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>>30888051
>Be Raganon the comfy, drinker of beer.
>Two hours prior known as Officeanon the pissed.
>Is it really so damn fucking hard to use google to fix your own fucking problems?
>But nooooooo, lets just bother Anon!
>The TV shows some stupid fucks doing stupid things and next to it there is some giant white ass.
>Attached to the gigantic ass is your slave.
>Honestly that is what they are despite any fancy words.
>She is cleaning the shelves while you watch TV.
>The way this distracts you is only because the show is so shit.
>R-right?
>It was by the luck of straw that you came to encouter her.
>A perfect slave...
>She is obedient, nice and is eager to please. She never doubts you or complains.
>Not that you would ask for anything hard to do...
>But something is wrong.
>She doesn't ask for much, in fact there were only two things she ever asked of you.
>Clothes for her cleaning duty so her coat would't get dirty while she performs her duties and stoping some asshole from beating his pony.
>You granted both.
>Anonymous the kind!
>No matter what you do she accepts it.
>But the way she looks sometimes...
>You should be happy but every time you look at her your mood goes down the drain.
>She always smiles when you speak to her.
>Her smile is fake.
>Not just the "I am happy to see you too, coworker"-type of smile that you perfected over the years.
>Her smile is...
>It is hollow.
>Like some emotionless robot pulling strings that are connected to the musces of her face.
>And she talks in her sleep.
>She appologizes in her sleep.
>She cries in her sleep.
>When you asked her why she is so damn fine with her position all she said was "I deserve this."
>The only time you can see some genuine emotion on her face is when there are news about ponies that are mistreated.
>You take another sip from your beer as...
>>
>>30887080
>simmed it
Nah. Didn't get that impression at all.

>went overboard on the backstory
I mean, I don't think it's too grimdark. There was a war after all.

But it's certainly not making me like her more either. Lightning has a lot to answer for, and despite all the shit she's experiencing I can't entirely feel sympathetic to her after discovering that bit of her past.
>>
>>30888041
>"let's get this out onto a tray"
>nice
>>
>>30888328
That's what I was wanting then.
I didn't want it to be apity the slave story, nor an irredeemable monster.
I was aiming for Dust to be something of a monster, an in character spiteful one, who is more just wanting to forget she did it.
That was not fun talking with people to get the rough idea of it.
But I think it was good for them.
>>
>>30888056
>you're doing it wrong
>celestia should be more down
>writes green from someone other than her perspective
no you're doing it wrong.

But I agree, Celestia in canon is shit, because emotionally speaking her character arc is about as made use of as trixie's was before season 6. A lonely schizo horse queen who's machinations are to entirely put her sister by her side again but even she knows that she doesn't deserve it, when twilight is sent away she probably imagines that they will cure NMM of her hate, but celestia will stay banished, because that is what she deserves for failing her sister. the progress between her reconciliation aborted by the staff and fausts need for the pilot to have a discernable ending, her student never to return and pick apart the manic white giant who plucks now the strings of fate more out of habit than purpose. the common fanon Night court never to make an appearance, and Luna to never even get a throne after 7 fucking seasons.

If we took the true celestia's personality and faced her with abject failure, there is probably no debasement she would not endure knowing she failed her sister twice. I imagine the ponies will be further losses, but some crack in her armor wont care with her sister to remember this torture forever.
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>>30888056
I like this, it makes me sad
>>
>>30888733

This version of the story is real?

Where can I get more information?
>>
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>>30888056
but why
>>
>>30854092
>According to the radio, the storm's actually getting worse instead of better.
>Of course, that's good news for you. Maybe you've still got some luck after all.
>Fortunately, he's not cruel enough to leave you tied up and bored for days. Either that or he got tired after two days of constant whining.
>"Arnold come on, my hooves hurt! Just for a few minutes? Please!"
>Eventually he caved and actually released the limbs. Who would have thought being able to kick your hoofsies would feel so great?
>You admit you blushed a little when he chuckles at your pleased trotting and stretching. Maybe if he spent almost four full days tied up he'd understand.
>Whatever.
>Sitting down instead of walking only left you with one thing to do, talk to him. You'd spent the past few days building something of a rapport with the human. You'd both grown a bit more comfortable around the other, as well as learned a few things.
>One thing you've picked up so far is that he actually does have morals, weird ones, but morals nonetheless.
>He's willing to steal ponies against their wills, but only because he genuinely believes they'll be happier and safer where he takes them. He also avoids unnecessary cruelty such as more painful restraints or using a 'real' gun.
>You were a bit confused about the 'real' part until he showed you. Needless to say you were terrified once he shot a few rocks to show you. Rocks! It blew up solid stone! How could anyone even think about using that on a living creature?!
>The first few shots of destructive power had you quivering in fear, the last one had you running in terror. Shame the prey side of your brain is an idiot, all you managed to do was fall over when you ran out of chain.
>"Whoa there sparky! You ok?"
>Not really!
>The primitive part of your brain is still screaming at you to hide, so you go to the only place you could reach, inside your sleeping bag.
>Yeah yeah, it's not really going to protect you, but it still feels a bit safer.
>>
>>30889436
>"Hey, you don't have to hide, I promise."
>La la la la la, can't hear you.
>You continue to ignore him until something is pushed into the front of your sleeping bag.
>Crap, it's one of those tasty peaches. Where does he get these things? God they're so good, you can't stay mad or scared while eating one of these.
>You'll munch it, but you'll munch inside the sleeping bag... and with a frown!
>He's quiet while you polish off the fruit then throw out the pit.
>Huh no smart remarks yet, is he even still there?
>Reluctantly you pull back the top of the sleeping bag and peak out.
>Wat? The gun looks to be in several pieces all over the ground.
"Did it break?"
>"Welcome back. I just needed to clean it a bit, it'll go right back together. Didn't scare you too much did I?"
"I-It's just a bit... intimidating. You said people actually use those on ponies?"
>"Well, smaller caliber ones sometimes. Usually just for dangerous types."
"But you wouldn't ever...?"
>"Oh, no no. This one's just for hunting and protection. Like you said, there's lots of beasties out there even if this isn't the everfree."
"Hunting...?"
>"Sorry, hunting animals. You know the ones that can't talk."
"So you can... eat...?"
>Holy crap, you knew he was an omnivore in theory but how can he just casually chat about hunting and eating things!?
>"Every bit yeah. I try and avoid it when I've got guests though."
>Guests. Don't want the valuable prey panicking when they see your violently devour some other poor herbivore?
>"Just don't worry about it sheila. All you'd ever get is the tranq for a nice peaceful nap."
>He strides over to the post you're chained too and removes the lock. Uh oh, did you ask too many questions? Is he going to silence you now!? You'd half expected violence by now, but is this really it?!
>"What do you say to a walk? Been awhile since you've stretched those legs."
>Oh. A walk. That's less horrible than what you'd imagined.
>Can't be too easy though.
>>
>>30889438
>Do you want to go on a walk? yes.
>Do you want to be seen as too compliant? No.
>"We'll go fishing how about that?"
>Fish is good... Fine, you crawl out of your sleeping bag and wait patiently for him to release you.
>This is the first time you've been unchained from the metal stake since your escape attempt. He clipped the other end to himself, but now you at least have a chance to overpower him. Is it worth the risk though? He said the gun was just for the 'dangerous types', a list you were glad you didn't yet occupy.
>No, you should just play it cool. Time is on your side, for now. Looking for opportunities is smarter than taking big risks when you don't have to.
>That said, it feels good to trot. He's a bit slow with his inferior number of legs but that just lets you take it easy.
>You recognize a few landmarks along the trail.
"Are we going to the stream?"
>"You bet."
"Why not the pond? I've seen much bigger fish there?"
>"Oh, is there? Lead the way then miss tour guide."
>Stupid human can't even navigate the stupid forest. How did you get caught by this fool?
>Your charge is reasonable excited at the fantastic pond you lead him to. It's cool you guess, good for a swim at least. You yourself just sit on the side and grab a drink.
>You take a few sips before you catch him watching you out of the corner of your eye.
"What?"
>"Nah, it's nothing."
>He looks around for a second as if taking the whole area in.
>"Do a lot of animals come here to drink?"
"It's more popular than the river. I've seen everything from deer to manticores here."
>"Hmm might be a good spot..."
"Spot for what?"
>"Nothing, don't worry about it. Why don't you just unwind a bit while I catch some dinner?"
>Since when has 'don't worry about it' ever been good advice?
>Good spot huh? What would he need a place for? Camping? Maybe, but he was interested in the animals...
>A glint of light draws your attention to the weapon on his back. Hold on a minute!
>>
>>30889443
"Wait! You better not be planning on hurting anything!"
>"Hey relax. I'll do it when you're not here. I've got to eat too you know."
"You've been fine so far!"
>Truth be told you have no idea what his dietary needs are. It's pretty likely he does need meat but you also don't want deaths on your conscience.
>"Well for a little bit yeah but I can't live off veggies forever."
>The science part of your brain wants to argue that an omnivore should be able to do just that, but you really don't know enough. Not only do different omnivore's dietary requirements vary, but he's an alien to this world.
"What about fish? Isn't that enough?"
>"What, fish aren't alive too? Why are they less important?"
>Because they aren't quadrupeds you can identify with.
>You trot a few quick circles in frustration.
"I just don't want to be responsible for innocent deaths..."
>"It's nature sheila. Just think of it as the circle of life."
>Circle of 'gonna kick him into the lake'.
*Grumble grumble* "Don't like it."
>The monster has the gall to reach over and ruffle your mane!
>You pull as far out of his reach as you can, and attempt to fix the hair he messed up.
>"I'll try to keep it away from you alright?"
>You grumble some more and lay down in the grass. Meat eaters go away, herbivore master race.
"Stupid meat..."
>"Yeah, but it's tasty."
>You make an exaggerated gagging noise.
"Gross! Herbivore here! And prey species!"
>"Bah, you say that but you're the dominant species."
"Doesn't change some things..."
>The sensation of a hand between your shoulder blades makes you jump! How did he sneak up on you like that? Maybe you'd underestimated how stealthy something as large as him could be; he is a self proclaimed hunter after all.
>Either way you swing a hoof behind you to try and ward off the now scratching fingers. They don't actually feel that bad but still.
"No touch."
>The declaration isn't nearly as strong or commanding as you wanted.
>>
>>30889449
>"Don't be like that now. You know I'm just trying to make it up to you."
"You can make it up to me by letting me go..."
>"You know I can do that that either. If I don't bring you they'll just send someone else, could be someone even meaner than me."
"Meaner than you? No way."
>"Hey, who went and got your favorite fruit without even being asked?"
>Ok yeah he did do that. You'd just mentioned peaches in passing then before you knew it he had fetched a dozen.
"I guess that was nice."
>A silent moment passes with his hand still scratching your back. It feels nice, maybe a bit physical contact will make him more sympathetic.
"So what happens to you after all this? Isn't Mr. big shot hunter going to be bored going back to normal animals?"
>"I've thought about that too. I don't really know what I'll do, what could compete with this?"
>He frowns a little as he casts the line back into the pond.
"Is there like a time limit? Like how long until they send someone else?"
>"I doubt they would unless I threw in the towel."
"I-I don't want to go in yet, and I don't think you want your best hunt ever to end either."
>"Well, I'll miss it that's for sure."
"You could, I mean we could do it again."
>He looks down at you and cocks an eyebrow.
>"Do it again? You want me to let you go."
>Well it sounds stupid when you put it that way.
"Why not? You caught me last time, don't think you could do it again?"
>"Oh I know I could but that's just not how this all works."
"But you said yourself there's no real time limit. We can't even get back to your people because of the weather so why rush? Just think of it as a game?"
>Is that a good laughter or a bad laughter?
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>>30889453
>"First of all, I could catch you again with no problem."
>Hopefully your challenging smirk will goad him into a stupid decision.
>"Secondly, you've got a point-"
>You jump to your hooves in excitement! Is he going to do it!?
>"Those idiots said the dam might even break, so we've got all the time in the world. You want to play hide and seek?"
>He unclips the chain from your bridle and gives your flank a firm swat!
>"Let's play hide and seek!"
>If freedom wasn't good enough motivation the swat was! You bolt away from the pond just as fast as you can! Gotta run! Got to get away! He'll never catch you again!
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>>30889459
Tiny update with a bit of improved snark. I expect snark + cute to continue to scale for the foreseeable future.

pastebin: https://pastebin.com/QzZ26eq9
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>>30889470
Hey Arnold!
>>
Thoughts on a possible morally ambiguous anon. Who may rescue a pony from death, but will still expect slave type duties from her. Emphasis on manipulation, duality of Anon, and how to be a good slave owner?
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>>30889531
That's most of the Anons here. Aspiring particularly, but even Vegas Arnold just now could fit.
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>>30889470
Lovely update, Vega! You will have to answer what's wrong with her magic sometime. Can't our POV magical expert make some guesses and experiments? And how does he justify Twilight being so much safer in captivity on earth when she is already the 'dominant species' on her own home planet?
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>>30889531
>good slave owner
Slaveventure. All the other Anons are really just hobbyists, he's a real businessman with thousands of profitable (and healthy and happy) units. Despite his mistakes he seems to be quite successful.
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>>30889914
>and happy
Debatable
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>>30889922
>debatable
TRIPLE DUBS confirm that ya it is. Let's bring Comet and Autumn back from the glue farm to help debate it! Being a 'good slave owner' means that his stocks happyness is one of the factors he cares about, but not the biggest one.
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>>30889470
This was great Vega, need more! more cute play of cat and the mouse between Sheila and Mr. Hunter!
>>
"I just don't know about her anymore."
>"Honey, getting a domestic assistant was your idea."
"I know that, and she does a fine job with the housework. I just don't like the way she acts around you."
>"I really don't know what to tell you. It's a tiny horse that that acts like a dog and does the laundry. How do you want it to act?"
"I'm telling you that thing is smarter than you realize. Have you not noticed she only snuggles up to you? Always has her backside turned towards you? Nothing swings it's hips that much naturally and even that's only around you."
>"You swing your hips."
"For you! Which is why I don't like her doing it!"
>"Can we just drop it for now? I'll try to be more sensitive to it acting weird, but you've got to cut the little thing some slack. It's just trying to fit into a new world."
"Trying to fit in a little too well..."
>"What?"
"Nothing, fine I'll try."
>You're starting to regret asking your husband, Anon, to buy you that little pony.
>Sure it was a help around the house, and oh so pretty, but that just might be the problem.
>You've seen where his eyes wander when the little homewrecker walks by.
>You just had to have the pretty one with her adorable little makeup.
>Too bad she's outside the return policy. Not that Anon would allow it, not his little 'couch buddy'.
>At first you didn't mind. She'd fetch him drinks or snacks when asked, make herself generally useful, no big deal. No big deal until you caught that smirk. That little shit eating smirk she gave you as your husband ran his fingers through her mane while she cuddled into his side.
>She knows what she's doing, you know that for sure.
>Is it stupid to be insecure about a horse stealing your man? A horse who's huge white ass is somehow always catching his eye. No, no it's not.
"Can we at least get her some clothes?"
>"Fem it's a horse, they don't wear clothes. Where do you even want to buy horse clothes?"
"If I can find something to cover her up with can I?"
>>
>>30889986
>"If it bothers you that much then sure."
>Someone has to make clothes for these things or your name isn't femanon.

>Once back at your computer finding pony clothes takes no effort at all. You probably should be surprised, they make dog clothes so why not pony?
>Now where is that little hussy? You need her measurements.
>You check her room on the way to the living room, but of course she's not there.
>You pretty much know exactly where she is. Yep, curled up against Anon.
"Rarity come here, I need you for a moment."
>The little brat just turns to look at you and purse her lips.
>God you're going to beat this pony.
>She doesn't even pretend to make an effort until you snap your fingers and point at the ground in front of you.
>Of course, she has to rub her whole body up against Anon as she crawl off the couch...
>Just relax fem, it's only a horse.
"I need your measurements come here."
>She at least follows you back to your workroom and sits still for the tape measurer. She does look a bit confused, for not the first time you wished ponies could talk. They can understand humans well enough to follow simple tasks but horse vocal cords only allows for the typical neighs and whinnies.
>A lack of a voice doesn't prevent her from displaying her displeasure when you show her what you're planning on buying. Grossed out faces must be pretty universal.
"Well tough luck if you don't like it. You and I both know what you're trying to do here, so this is to cover this."
>You poke the indignant mare in the tri diamond mark on her ample flanks.
>The way she shakes her head and swats your finger away is funny.
"Like you have a choice sweetie."
>You grab both of her cheeks and use your most sugar sweet sing song voice.
"He's never going to look at you like that again when we're done playing dress up!"
>>
>>30889994
>You relish in the scowl she gives you before yanking herself out of your grasp. If she could talk you're sure she'd be spitting venom at you, but the little skank has to settle for slapping you with her tail on the way out.
>The triumphant feelings are short lived when the white homewrecker makes a few lewd gestures on her way out. Ones that involve pointing down the hall at at your husband then lifting her tail and pointing at herself!
>That little bitch!

Rarity
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>That little bitch!
>She thinks she can force you into those awful outfits?!
>She's right about one thing, he'll never look at you the same way if you're wearing trash bags like those!
>Perhaps you can purposely tear them then act like it was an accident. It's easy to convince him you're clumsy and innocent.
>Either way there's absolutely no way you can wear them, not after you've come this far to steal her man.
>Yes, steal her man. You aren't proud of it but this is the cost of survival for a pony like you.
>Oh how you wish you'd known he had a wife when he'd first come to pick you out! You'd tried so hard to seem alluring only to be brought home to her!
>He's perfect: handsome, easily manipulated, constantly underestimating you.
>She on the other hoof is the exact opposite of what you need: Sharp, cleaver, and jealous.
>As much as it pains you to admit you aren't a pony of exception skills. You aren't the strongest, or the most magical, what you are the is most appealing.
>One must play to one's strength and for you that's wiggling your way into men's beds and hearts. Too bad this one's bed is already occupied.
>Let it never be said that Rarity Belle stood down from a challenge.
>She may be onto you but he's already too wrapped around your hoof to take her concerns seriously.
>>
>>30890007
>You've already achieved 'couch buddy' status, a position that offers plenty of initial physical contact to get him used to the feel on pony hide under his hands. All it takes from here is a wiggle here and a nudge there to get what you want.
>His eyes are already glued to your flanks on a regular basis. After all, what male could resist a derriere like this?
>You slink back into the living room. She's no doubt ordering you the most ghastly coverings she can find, so you must work fast.
>Ah perfect, his snacks have run dry. You take your time bending over the coffee table to grab the chip bag with your mouth. Take a good look big boy!
>Returning with a new bag earns you a thanks and a soothing neck rub. He doesn't even have to break his vision from the TV. There's simply no need, he's already used to putting his hands all over your supple body.
>A purr encourages him to continue as you crawl up on the couch.
>It's time to be bold. Instead of lying down beside him you wiggle yourself under his arm and right over his lap. It's intimate, and personal, and he doesn't miss a beat placing both hands on your body to continue the deep tissue massage.
>Oh Rarity you genius you!
>A little scooting around places one of his hands exactly where you want it, your bountiful backside. Oh my, that feels nice!
>Either he's not paying attention to what body part he's working so firmly, or he's more comfortable with you than you thought!
>It takes real effort to keep your body under control as his hands dig into you. You can't make a scene quite yet!
>You avoid losing yourself in the bliss long enough to hear footsteps approaching.
>>
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>>30890012
>Oh my you should stop this before she sees... But, how you can't wait to see the look on her face!
>You decide to be naughty! A mare only lives once after all!
>Whatever she was going to say catches in her throat when she sees your devious grin over her husband's lap.
>Goodness she'll get an aneurysm!
>You decide to help her along by subtly lifting your rump so she can see exactly where his hand is working.
>She shit eating smirk probably doesn't help.
>"ANON!"
>>
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>>30890021
Wow I'm stupid I forgot to put the title at the top. Anyway It's been too long since I got to write bratty/naughty rarity, so this is just a bit i threw together in the last hour. If there's interest I could add a bit more and yes she MIGHT be for spanking. probably is let's be honest

Title: Homewrecker
Pastebin: https://pastebin.com/4WLWT4eU
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>>30890038
Dank.
>>
>>30889986
New Story?
>>
>>30890007
>he'll never look at you the same way if you're wearing trash bags like those!

It's okay! The husband is already fond of Rarity, so it's not like he's put off by trash.

Good shit though.
>>
>>30890038
You'll continue the main story and at the same time offer them. . ."Moments of life?"

OK for me
>>
>>30890133
>>30890038
>>30890050
Oh forgot to mention this story is independant of my others. Completely ignore anything from 'staying out of trouble' it does not apply to this story.
>>
>>30890141
Again Vega, is Ok for me, is one good begin and hope read more
>>
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>>30889255
Because not everybody likes Celestia.
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>>30890444
But those people are faggots so who cares what they think?
>>
>>30890475
You are just being silly right now. Why would EVERYBODY like a background pony who does nothing in the main plot?
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>>30890444
But why wouldn't someone like Celestia? She is kind, sweet and a benevolent ruler. There is nothing to dislike, unless you're a corrupt and evil piece of shit.
>>
>>30890563
Because she is the opposite of what ruler should be, not just a no-good mentor. Her character is done poorly and there is little cute left in a sad old mare.
>>
>>30890600
Damn those are some HOT opinions right there.

>Because she is the opposite of what ruler should be
>implications
Just because you're used to murderous dictators and corrupt cuntbags doesn't mean they should be the norm.
>>
>>30890605
>>30890600
not everyone has to like the same characters.
>>
>>30890605
Does not take one to be murderous dictator to do something more than eating cakes. Was she of any help in any major conflict? Is there a single duty of hers which is more than representative? Did she at least do something last 1000 years aside from spawning more alicorns? Inb4 muh sun moving

>>30890610
That's what I was trying to say
>>
>>30890621
Just because she isn't constantly at the front lines doesn't mean she's useless. The president doesn't normally storm the beaches, senpai.

She's still ruling one of, if the the most powerful nation on the planet.
>>
>>30890627
that doesn't mean everyone has to like her character. It's not a big deal if people don't enjoy every single character. That's just how opinions work.
>>
>>30890640
Then stop making terrible excuses for hating her then.

Your opinion is still shit btw.
>>
>>30890648
i'm not that other anon, I like celestia. I just don't get bent out of shape when other people feel differently.
>>
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>>30890653
>bent out of shape
>>
>>30890627
Closest thing we saw her doing to ruling a country was reading old ass scrolls by a campfire. I dont say this is bad when your subordinated can keep the government working without your involvement, but what else is she left to do besides cakes and citting ribbons? She does less than Elizabeth II and gets worshipped more than Kim Jon Un, and in my eyes this is strange. And her role in the plot is less than Snips and Snails have.
>>
>>30890661
That's because it's a children's cartoon.
They're not going to have several episodes detailing court intrigue and the intricacies of ruling a nation and dealing in politics.
>>
>>30890680
so you're just assuming she's a good leader then? I guess you can do that but it's just as unfounded as assuming she's an awful one.
>>
>>30890661
What are you talking about? In the Crystal War timeline we saw her leading from the front, and Royal Problem showed that she still oversees court as well as dealing with many of the smaller details of ruling. And on top of that, we've also seen her dealing with foreign ambassadors and teaching classes at her magic school. Celestia is a very busy mare.
>>
>>30890685
Why the fuck not? She's benevolently ruling over a peaceful and highly prosperous kingdom and all her subjects love her. Sure is a lot more evidence of her being a good leader than a bad one, famalam.
>>
Are there any good stories with nothing big happening and just cuddles?
>>
>>30890700
>all her subjects love he
That's because it's a children's cartoon.
They're not going to have several episodes detailing societal inequities or government protest.
>>
>>30890680
Ah, yes, because 3+ rating forbids us from showing some paperwork or mentioning trade connections.

>>30890693
> to battle, my minions, while I'll eat some cake
> hello, my foreign dudes, have some cake and watch some fireworks
> Greetings, younglings. Congratulations with ending up in Academy. I'll go eat some cake while miss Teacher Butt teaches you magick, I may even show at exams if I manage to finish the cake by that time.
>>
>>30890714
>>30890742
gee anons

kinda tough to show her doing her job when the writers never write an episode for her
>>
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>>30890700
> ruling over a peaceful and highly prosperous kingdom and all her subjects love her
That's the joke
>>
>>30890748
> s7, episode just about how they get through the daily tasks
> cakes, ribbons, photos for newspaper
Gee, lads.

>>30890703
Nothing but K-on and clear skies comes into mind
>>
>>30890748
See >>30890714 >>30890680

It's like it goes both ways or something. You can't just assume shes a good leader but they don't have time to make episodes about it without assuming its possible shes a bad leader but they don't have time to make episodes about it.
>>
>>30890765
You can generally assume a leader is at the very least somewhat good by the quality of life of the citizens and the fact she's still the leader. This isn't difficult to grasp.
>>
>>30890742
Man, it's really easy to argue when you can just make bullshit up and handwave away everything she does, huh?

Just because she hasn't had an episode where she explicitly goes out and manages the kingdom doesn't mean that she doesn't do anything. There are multiple episodes that show Celestia doing busywork in the background, and even a couple where she explicitly does so in the foreground. How can you go 'oh, I wish she'd talk about trade connections' and then in the same post go 'oh, she doesn't really talk to those ambassadors or teach those classes, she just took them to a show and then ate cake.' It's nonsense.

I think your blind hatred for Celestia is causing you to be biased, and I'm not sure there's anything I can say to get past that, so I'm not going to argue with you, because there's no point.
>>
>>30890773
>>30890776
You guys realize he's baiting you, right?
>>
>>30890796
I like to assume the best of people, because sometimes people have been on 4chan so long that they can only communicate through shitposting but it's pretty clear I should just stop at this point.
>>
>>30890776
>>30890773
Arguing about bullshit again when there's a green update and a whole new story in thread.
>>
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>>30890776
> handwave away everything she does
If she did anything, that is. Easier to handwave nothing than anything, don't you agree?

Well then shouldn't you slow down a bit and stop giving your own headcanon as official canon? All we see is cakes and this is not enough to earn _everyone's_ sympathy.

> It's nonsense
It's all we see in episodes. Not my fault.

> blind hatred
> your opinion is not like mine so it is shit
You're literally implying things that are unconfirmed even by sideway details. If I don't share your adoration for background character that doesn't mean I hate it, that just means I dont mind her going through average slave green. Not like she is someone special.
>>
>>30890831
>>30890475
>>30890563
>>30890605
>>30890627
>>30890648
>>30890680
>>30890693
>>30890700
>>30890742
>>30890748
>>30890773
>>30890776
Holy crap trying this hard to make someone like the same character as you. How about you give green feedback or go to some other thread to talk about your offtopic garbage?
>>
>>30890038
This is one of the most deserving rarara's i've ever read. She better get into trouble for this.
>>
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>>30890848
Do we have a fire extinguisher here?

> How about you give green feedback
Maybe we shold rap duel about it so you would not call the police?
>>
>>30890038
This is so close to my expectations of her this is almost creepy
>>
>>30890848
lol asshurt
>>
[One-shot] "Redemption by a Filly" - Cloudy Spinel
https://pastebin.com/765frTMU

> Opening her eyes as she comes back to the world of the living, Cloudy Spinel narrows them as the soft rays of the morning sun come in through the window. So that is what woke the pony from her dream; it is a fortunate really – this dream involved her and her parents, where they were shopping for a gift for an aunt back in the Crystal Empire. The little pony sits up carefully, letting out a sigh as her gaze is fixed on the bedsheet beneath her. She misses her parents terribly, and having that dream did little to ease the aching emptiness in her heart. If only she had listened to them… If only she been more careful… If only she not pushed her way through the crowd to meet her friend…
> Cloudy feels a familiar urge to cry as the feelings of regret and loss claws at her. Just like that, before she realised her mistake, she was separated from her parents in the crowd of ponies as they left the Crystal Empire. There was a “war”, according to her mother, and they had to leave their home because “bad two-legged creatures” are coming. The pony obeyed and listened to her mother exactly as she was brought up to, and made no objections other than insisting that she gets to bring along her stuffed elephant, Mr Patches, along for the journey. She is a good filly. Has been, and always will be… except for that instant when she saw Coral Shores in the crowd….
>>
>>30890924
> A soft grunt distracts the pink-coated pony from her memories and sorrow. Turning to her right, she is greeted to the sight of one of the “bad two-legged creatures” that her mother had warned her about. He is Master; that is what he told her to call him anyway, and he is still sleeping in the large bed that they share. Cloudy uses a hoof to brush her purple mane out of her eyes as she watches the “human” snooze gently; her face breaking into a small smile as she remembers the warmth of his body when he hugged her from behind last night. It was… nice.
> Her mother was… wrong. Master is anything but “bad”, and he certainly did not “beat” her or “take away her toys” or “snatch her from her parents”; that last one was HER fault, actually. In fact, in the months since he rescued her from the dark and smelly place filled with ponies in cages, he has always been gentle and caring to her, and he brought her to many nice and fun places in the Human world. Restaurants, amusement parks, the beach, and even the theatre – a place for grown-ups! He even bought her Mr Stuffy, her-
> The filly’s eyes widen as she realises that her new “teddy bear”, as he calls it, is missing. Her teal eyes dart around as Cloudy searches frantically for Mr Stuffy, and feeling increasingly panicky when she does not see him, she decides to lay down on her front to look at the floor by her side of the bed.
> There he is! He must be so lonely; he was probably left on the floor by himself through the night, and the little pony feels guilty for making her friend feel bad. She must have kicked him off when she tossed and turned.
> Cloudy grunts softly as she reaches her hooves forward to try and pick him up. She must stretch them to their limits, but even then, her limbs are simply too short. Not one to give up easily, the filly adjusts the position of her body as she tries again to pick up her plush toy.
>>
>>30890929
> “Mr Stuffy! You’ll be okay! I’m coming to save y-”
> Her body shifts, and the filly is suddenly weightless. She is falling on her face, and the ground is-
“Be careful, little one. Jesus!”
> Cloudy blinks as her muzzle is mere centimetres from the carpet. Then, she feels more pressure on the hand holding one of her hind hooves before another moves below her chest. With a gentle heave, the human lifts her up and sets her on the bed, shaking his head lightly as he reaches down to retrieve Mr Stuffy from the floor. Moving the bear towards her, the human pauses just as the little pony reaches her hooves forward to receive the plushie. He pulls back and decides to hug the bear instead, earning himself a pout from the filly, which quickly turns into a scared look when she sees the frown on his face. His voice comes out firm.
“You could have gotten badly hurt, y’know? Haven’t I told you before to get off the bed if you want to pick things up? Not the first time, right?”
> Her response is quick.
> “But Daddy, I know what I’m doing! I just-”
“Cloudy…”
> The filly shrinks back from the tone of his voice, and the not-so-subtle warning causes her to dip her head lightly as she realises her mistake. Sighing softly, Cloudy’s voice comes out softer this time.
> “Yes, Master… No calling you “Daddy”…”
“Good. I’m not your father, Cloudy. HE is out there somewhere, and I am your Master.”
> “… Yes, Master…”
> Reluctantly, the filly nods before she lets out a soft sigh and mutters her next words under her breath.
> “… even though I see you as my daddy… Master…”
> Frowning at the filly, Master lets out a pained breath and chooses to ignore that comment. Instead, he shakes the bear at her as he reprimands the pony.
“As I was saying, you should be careful when you-”
> “Okay, Master! I get it! I’m sorry, and I’ll won’t do it again, okay?!”
>>
>>30890933
> Her sudden burst of emotion makes the man’s frown deepen as the filly glares at him. Instead of being angry, however, he lets out a pained sigh and places the bear on the bed beside him. Reaching his hands over, he gathers the little pony and hugs her, using a hand to stroke her mane gently as he mutters to her.
“You had one of those dreams again, huh Cloudy? About… Them?”
> Almost as quick as it came, the filly’s rage disappears and is replaced by an immense sadness. Her lower lip is trembling as she nods, and already, tears are leaking from her eyes. Using his hand to guide her head such that she is resting it on his shoulder, he lets out another breath when she starts crying earnestly. He continues to pat the back of her mane gently as he hushes her.
“It’s okay… It’s okay, Cloudy. Remember that none of it is your fault; things just happened, okay? I know you are hurting inside, and I’m here for you, little pony. Go ahead, cry it out. It’s okay, Cloudy… It’s okay… Let it out… You’ll feel better after…”
> “I miss my Mommy, Master… I miss Daddy…. I want my Mommy and Daddy, Master…! I want to go home! I want to go see them again! I want Mommy and Daddy, Master… I want to see them again… I want to…”
> Coughing lightly as his own tears pool in his eyes, Master just hushes Cloudy Spinel, even as he chokes on his words and his voice cracks.
“It’s okay, Cloudy… It’s okay… Cry if you need to, little one. Master’s here… Master’s here for you…”
> “Why can’t I go home, Master? Why can’t I get to see Mommy and Daddy again? I want to go home, Master… I want to see them again… Please, Master… please… I want to go home… I want Mommy and Daddy again… please…”
>>
>>30890934
> The man does not respond. She already knows his answers, and there is little point in reaffirming those since she is just asking these questions for the sake of it, so he just keeps hushing her and plants a gentle kiss on the top of her head. His cheeks feel ticklish when those tears in his eyes escape their confines.
> Surprisingly, it is Cloudy who recovers first. After a few minutes of crying together, she moves her muzzle up and licks at his wet cheeks, causing Master to pause and blink at her. The filly gives him a boop on his nose with her hoof, giggling lightly as she does so.
> “Boops are magical, Master. Daddy always said that, and he told me that they are a show of love and trust.”
> Her words earn the filly a gentle, if teary, smile from the man. He reaches a hand up to hold her hoof, and leaning in, he plants a soft kiss on the frog, making the pony giggle more.
> “Hehehe M-Master! That tickles! Hehehehe!”
> Keeping his smile, the man waits for Cloudy’s laughter to subside before he speaks softly.
“And kisses, little one, are how we humans show love and trust. I suppose they are magical too.”
> “We ponies do it too, Master! I’ve seen Princess Cadance and Prince Shining Armor kissing at the Crystal Palace! Hehehe!”
> The filly blushes a little and leans in to whisper.
> “It was so sweet, Master. Mommy tried to cover my eyes, but I saw it.”
> Chuckling lightly at her words, the man smiles at her.
“I would suppose so. They sound like they are deeply in love.”
> She pauses for a moment and frowns at him.
> “M-Master, do you love me?”
> He flinches and turns his eyes away from the filly, moving them to stare at a spot on the bedsheet.
> “W-What do you mean, little one?”
> “Do. You. Love. Me?”
> He frowns lightly at her persistence, but the filly is not swayed. She in turn, is frowning at him as she waits for him to answer her question.
“I… I do. You are a special little girl, Cloudy, and I do.”
>>
>>30890937
> “So why can’t you be my Daddy now, Master? Why can’t you be my human Daddy? I don’t understand; Daddy always says that he loved me, so he is my daddy. You just said that you love me, so you should be my human Daddy.”
“It isn’t so simpl-”
> “I don’t care! You kissed my hoof, so you love and trust me, just as I booped your nose to show that I love and trust you! You are my Daddy, Master! My human Daddy!”
> Her insistence causes the man’s frown to deepen. Clearly, Cloudy Spinel is projecting her loss of her parents by seeing him as a substitute for her father. Yet, he cannot BE her father. No fucking way. Not after… everything… that has happened between them.
> …

> Carrying the dirty filly into the bathroom, the man gently deposits her onto the tiled floor. Almost immediately, she shrinks back and cowers away from him, pinning her ears back as her teal eyes watches him in obvious terror.
> “I’m s-sorry for making your shirt d-dirty, Mister Human! Pl-please don’t beat me! I… I didn’t mean… I’m sorry! Pl-please… I’m sorry!”
> He grunts softly as he picks up the showerhead and turn it on, waving a hand in dismissal of her apologies.
“I’m not going to beat you, little one. It’s just a shirt; I can always wash it after. You are safe now, and there is no need to be scared of me. I will not hurt you, and I will not beat you, because you have been a good girl so far.”
> Testing the temperature of the water on his forearm, the man smiles gently at her as he kneels down before her and pats her mane.
“You can call me Master, little one. You are staying with me from now on, in my house. No more cages, and no more… “bad” humans, as you call them. Now, I’m going to get you clean, then we have to go to bed. It’s late, and you need some rest.”
> Cloudy Spinel swallows hard, but stays in place as she watches him fearfully. He sighs softly, but keeps his smile when he speaks again.
>>
>>30890941
“Easy, little one. Relax. I told you that you are safe now, didn’t I? I will take good care of you.”
> “You promise, M-Master?”
> He nods.
“I promise.”
> “O-okay…”
> Allowing him to gently guide her into position, the filly stands still as the man starts to run the water through her mane, coat and tail. She turns her head towards Master and watches his movements, clearly still scared of him as he gives her a thorough rinsing down.
> “The bad human said that I must be a good girl for you in bed, Mis- Master, or else you will be angry and beat me.”
> Her fearful, but matter-of-fact tone when she said that makes Master pause, but he decides to ignore it and continue washing her. The pony’s ears pin back again, and her voice trembles when she speaks.
> “Y-you… you won’t b-beat me…. Will you… M-Master?”
“No, I won’t. I am not that kind of Master.”
> It seems like her natural curiosity wins over her fear and suspicion. She frowns lightly and tilts her head at him.
> “How many masters are there… Master?”
> Snorting in mild amusement, the man gently cleans Cloudy’s body, working his way towards her hindquarters.
“Two kinds, Cloudy. Good and bad. I like to think I am a good one.”
> “You are a good master, Master. You are nice.”
> He pauses again and stares at the filly as she smiles at him. She has barely known him for a few hours, and already, he can practically SEE her trusting him from the look that she has on her face.
“Why am I nice, little one? I haven’t done anything yet.”
> “Nuh-uh! You gave me tasty food just now, and you bought me an ice-cream! Thank you, Master!”
“Heh, you are welcome. I’m happy that you are happy.”
> Carefully, the man lifts the filly’s tail and washes her privates, noting how she blushes at the contact and pulls away from him.
“What’s wrong, Cloudy?”
> The filly blushes harder and stares at the hand which was on her backside moments earlier.
>>
>>30890944
> “Mommy and Daddy also always said that this is my “private parts”, and that no pony other than me should touch me there.”
> Master frowns lightly at her words, but shakes his head when he responds.
“Did they say anything about Masters? Or humans?”
> His question makes her frown in turn.
> “I… No, Master. They said “no pony”.”
> Now smiling gently, the man gently guides her back into position and continues washing her, speaking softly as he finishes up by rinsing her tail from base to tip.
“Then it should be okay for me, don’t you think? I am not a pony, little one.”
> She giggles softly at him as he turns the water off and stands to grab a towel. Gently and carefully, he dries the filly, taking his time to make sure that he does not miss a spot.
> “I’m happy that you are my friend, Master. Mommy said that nice ponies are friends, and even though you are not a pony, you are nice, so you are my friend.”
> Master coughs as a look of guilt flashes across his face. He laughs nervously and switches on a smile, nodding at her when he speaks.
“Y-yeah. You can say that I’m your friend. A special friend, that you listen to and obey.”
> Done with drying the filly, the man hangs the damp towel on a spreader bar before he removes the soiled shirt and deposits it into the laundry basket. Keeping his inner shirt, he gently scoops Cloudy into his arms and carries her out of the bathroom and into his bedroom.
> ““Listen to and obey”? Like a daddy or mommy?”
“I suppose so, but more of a Master.”
> Master lays the filly on the bed, who quickly sits up and tilt her head at him. Her ears are perked up, and her look is one of inquisitive innocence.
> “What’s the difference?”
> He chuckles as he proceeds to change out of his work clothes and into a more comfortable t-shirt, complete with a pair of shorts.
>>
>>30890948
“A Master is an authority figure, Cloudy Spinel. Something like a police officer or a teacher. They are not your parents, but you still listen to them and obey, right? Same thing then. I am your Master, so in the same way, you listen to me and obey me.”
> The filly nods her head vigorously at the explanation, and flashes Master a wide smile.
> “Okay. I will be a good filly and listen to you, because Master is a nice and good master. I promise. I will listen to you just as I listen to Mommy and Daddy.”
“Good. Now, it’s time to sleep. It has been a long and tiring day, and you need some rest.”
> Cloudy moves aside as the man turns off the lights and climbs into bed with her. Laying down on his side, his normal routine of browsing the Internet on his phone is disrupted by a soft sniffle from the pony. Almost immediately, he puts the phone down by the bedside table and sits up. Reaching his hands over, the man gently pulls the filly into a hug, and is mildly surprised when she wraps her hooves around his chest. Her grip is tight and strong.
> Master carefully strokes the back of her mane as he speaks softly.
“Hey, hey… What’s wrong, Cloudy? Why are you crying? Are you hurt? Tell me, little one.”
> “I miss… Mommy… and Daddy… I miss them, Master… I miss them…”
> Frowning deeply, the man hushes the filly as she cries.
“I’m sorry, little one… I’m so sorry… There there, I’m here. Master’s here… You are safe now, Cloudy, you are safe. Let it out, okay little one? It’s okay… Everything’s okay… There there…”
> “… I want my Mommy and Daddy… I want to go home… I want to go home! Pl-please… I want to go home… I want to see Mommy and Daddy… Please, I want to go home…”
>>
>>30890924
Well that was a good read. Thanks for writing it.
>>
>>30890953
> Master lets out a pained breath as he narrows his eyes. Looking down at the filly sadly, he is reminded of his original intentions for her, but now, seeing her like this… knowing the innocence and naivety of the pony child and experiencing it first-hand, how could he even have thought of doing THAT?
> He is unable to stop his own tears from falling as he holds Cloudy Spinel to his chest, rocking her slowly back and forth as he whispers soft, comforting words to the crying filly. Swallowing hard, Master beats himself up mentally for having those plans, feeling a sense of icy hatred for his perversion and depravity. There is a lump in his throat, and warmth at the corners of his eyes.
> He was not sure how long he was hugging and rocking her, but when he realised that his eyes are puffy and his cheeks are tear-stained, the filly is already sleeping in his embrace, having cried herself to sleep.
> Carefully, he lowers the filly to the bed and rests her head on a pillow. Moving her tail away gently with a hand, his eyes and fingers drift to her privates, but instead of feeling sexual arousal as he expected, the man grimaces as the urge to vomit takes over. Instead, he curses softly and drapes a thin blanket over her lower body, choosing to lay down beside her instead and holding her close to him with his arms. Looking over her sleeping form, the man carefully strokes her side as he presses her back to his chest, even leaning in to plant a shaky kiss on the top of her head as he mutters an apology to the unconscious pony.
>>
>>30890960
> It was a long time before he fell asleep that night, considering he broke down utterly, shortly after the kiss. The filly’s small body is so soft and warm, and she is very much vulnerable to anything that he wanted to do to her or with her. Her life is literally in his hands now; he gets to decide her fate. Happy, loved, and safe, or sad, alone and scared, that is his decision to make. This realisation, along with the memories of her innocent ways, simply tore at his heart and fills him with a crushing disgust for what he originally planned to do.
> Cloudy Spinel is but a filly. A pony child.
> And he is a monster.
> …

> Shaking his head lightly to clear his mind of the memory, the man looks into the filly’s teal eyes and speaks softly.
“It’s silly of me, but I don’t want to replace who Daddy is in your heart. If you call me that, I don’t feel comfortable, little one. Your Daddy is out there somewhere, so is your Mommy.”
> A bittersweet smile graces the little pony’s face as her earlier frown disappears quickly. She lowers her gaze and moves her hoof back as she sits still on his lap, allowing him to pet her mane gently when he chose to do so. Uncomfortable with the ensuring silence, he speaks to her softly.
“There, there… You are a good little filly, and I feel sad when I see that you are sad. I want you to be a happy pony, Cloudy, not a sad one. We will find them one day, okay? Your Daddy and Mommy? We will find them.”
> Shaking her head gently, Cloudy Spinel keeps that bittersweet smile. Then, she speaks quietly.
> “I am not stupid, Master. I can tell that you know something bad happened to Mommy and Daddy, and you don’t think I can return home. You always have that look when you tell me that I can go back to them one day, and that I can go home. I have no more parents now, right Master?”
> The man flinches, which makes the filly dip her head when her fears are confirmed. She looks as if she visibly deflated.
>>
>>30890964
> “... You see? I am not stupid, Master. You know something, but you are not telling me that.”
“Cl-Cloudy…”
> The pink-coated filly shakes her head again as her smile widens, causing her braided purple mane to drift through the air lazily. She is clearly attempting to be brave, as she had to wipe her eyes when tears start pooling in them.
> “It’s… okay, Master. I’m sure you are not telling me because you have good reasons to keep it a secret. I have you now, and you are a nice master. A good Master. You are my human Daddy, Master, and I love you and trust you.”
> Cloudy reaches a hoof up and presses the soft underside to the man’s nose again. She grins as tears rolls down her cheeks.
> “S-see? Now you can kiss my hoof again to show that you love and trust me too, Master.”
> Lowering her hoof, the man swallows hard as he leans in. He holds her head gently with his hands and plants a soft kiss between her eyes, giving her a warm smile as his bottom lip trembles. She closed her eyes and giggled softly when he did that.
> The Master strokes the back of her mane and keeps silent. She knows it now… He has tried to keep the truth away from her, but… she knows it now. He has under-estimated her levels of perception.
> Then, the man smiles softly and clears his throat with a light cough. He has come to a decision.
“Okay…”
> The pony’s eyes shoot open and she quickly looks up at him in wonder.
> “M-Master?”
> Stroking her cheek with a thumb, the man shakes his head lightly as tears roll down his cheeks.
“No more “Master”. You can call me “Daddy”, little one. I’ll be your human Daddy.”
> Instantly, she lunges forward and wraps her hooves around his neck, crying hard and rubbing her face into his cheek as she calls him by his new name.
> “Daddy! Master is my Daddy! My human Daddy! I love you, Daddy! I love you! Daddy… Daddy… Thank you, Daddy… Thank you…”
>>
>>30890967
> Master, no, Daddy, hugs the little filly and kisses her on the neck, sniffing softly before he closes his eyes and mutters to her.
“No… Thank you… And I love you too, little one.”
> As how he did on that first night she cried in his embrace, the man hushes her softly and rocks her gently back and forth. Eventually, her crying (and his) dies down, and reaching a hand over, he picks up her teddy bear and presses it into her side. The filly turns to look at the toy, and sitting back on his knees, the pony wraps a hoof around the plush and mumbles her thanks. She giggles when he wipes her cheeks with a thumb.
> Looking down at the bear, the man smiles at it before he moves his eyes to meet hers.
“I think Mr Stuffy needs a friend. What do you think, Cloudy? Shall we head out for some food, then to the store? I think I saw a large cat plushie the other day, and he is really fluffy and cute.”
> “R-really?! C-can we, Daddy? Please? Please, Daddy! Can we?”
> He ruffles her mane and grins at her, nodding as he does so. The man is probably already spoiling her, but he puts that thought aside.
“Go use the bathroom first, little one, and get ready. We’ll leave in ten minutes, okay?”
> Eagerly and with much enthusiasm, the filly nods her head quickly.
> “Yes Daddy!”
> Chuckling softly, Daddy moves both hands to under her chest and lifts her off the bed. He carefully deposits her on the ground, but calls out to the pony as she quickly moves to exit the room.
“Wait, Cloudy.”
> “Yes? Daddy?”
> Walking over to the pony, he gently picks up Mr Stuffy and turns the bear over in his hands, taking a good look at it. Then he gives the plushie a small smile before depositing it on the bed, whispering to her when he moves back and kneels in front of Cloudy Spinel.
>>
>>30890971
“Let’s give Mr Stuffy a surprise. If you bring him along, he will know that he has a new friend to play with straight away now, won’t he? Much better if you bring his friend home quietly.”
> Nodding quickly at his suggestion, the filly smiles warmly and whispers.
> “Okay, Daddy!”
> With that, Cloudy spins around and canters away as she makes her way to the bathroom. Watching her quietly as she takes her leave, Daddy lets out a soft sigh as that smile of his widens.
“… Thank you for saving my soul, little one… I’ll be a good Daddy for you, and you’ll be my daughter. I promise…”

---- Fin ----
>>
>>30889470
Sounds like Arnold is the kind of guy who would buy into the "white man's burden" claptrap.
>>
>>30890975
some dialog felt a bit unnatural, but it was still ok.
>>
>>30890975
This is my favorite thing you've wrote, wow this was good. Didn't overstay its welcome, but it also spent enough time on the little backstory for things to come together.

You have that theme of "sick twisted Anon plans on violating pony but changes his mind" in your stories, I've noticed. It works well here to provide dramatic tension, and when it all ends there is a nice sense of optimism and hope despite all that transpired.

I really liked this. Cloudy ftw
>>
>>30890038
Rarity is for spanking. I hope she gets her naughty temptress flanks bent over and paddled until her butt is hotter than the surface of the sun.

Time for spanking, Rarity.
>>
>>30890975
>hunts for her parents.
>learn father already passed on. buys mother out of bad situation.
>After quite the bumpy beginning he admits the truth and she starts to trust him.
>The more comfortable she gets the more anon feels he bought a wife rather than a slave.
>>
>>30891245
I'd read that
>>
>>30890038
A home-wrecking pet.
Damn, I want more of this.
>>
>>30890685
If Equestria there for over a thousand years and has not been destroyed by the Changelings, Dragons, Griphons and any other threat means that she has done her job very good

And although of course it's a cartoon for children and all, the only flaw of his reign is that his subjects are apparently cowardly bigots who flee are the minor problems and their military forces one mockery before enemy forces, I guess that happens when you live thousand years of peace and harmony without the threat that require you to adapt and learn to fight
>>
>>30890933
>“… even though I see you as my daddy… Master…”

My heart.....
>>
>>30891865
> has not been destroyed by the Changelings
Who kicked Celestia's ass this instant
> Dragons
Who eat crystals in their mountain and dont need anything in Equestria
> Griphons
Who are busy fighting each other
> any other threat
Which is at most Jonestown-like villages

I agree, the marsmallow universe does not encourage you for war, but they must have at least developed spells to protect themselves from wild animals. Ponyville is at the border of uncontrollable territory of Everfree, and Celestia is clearly old enough to know some shield spells at least. I guess. But the point of our wlame a couple of hours ago was about being a good ruler, and instead of being good ruler I believe she is better described as unbusy ruler (remember manehattan, appleoosa and ponyville being rather autonomous about their profits and wholo bunch of buerocrats dealing with paperwork for her). Which lets her to be all spectre of assholes or holy saints when she's not posing for a magazine. And then dude at the start of it says that she's just the little part of this specter and calls people names when they do not agree with his point of view.
>>
>>30892088
I think you're completely missing the narrative of the show, which has always implied since the start that Celestia handles countless duties of diplomacy, government, and dangerous situations off-screen as her job demands
>Mentioning how she was called on to deal with a Parasprite infestation in Filly in S1
>Mentions in S6 how ponies are always coming to her with some crisis

This is why you never see anyone complaining about her in show or otherwise unsatisfied with her rule because, for the most part, she does her job well. Those instances of Changelings beating her are the subject of those episodes and take up attention because they are the EXCEPTION, not the rule, and thus provide interest because now it's up to the main characters to cover for her. It also probably isn't the first time changelings have fought Celestia given they're well known enough by them, and I think you're making mountains out of anthills when you focus on the episodes in which she is defeated as though those were the only indicators of Celestia's competence, which the narrative implies to be stellar as the norm.
>>
>>30892149
> implied
It's not the show which does most implies here.

> called on to deal with a Parasprite infestation
She already was going there, and they asked her to hurry because of this.

> coming to her with some crisis
That is rich

> This is why you never see anyone complaining about her in show
Because it is for little girls?

> EXCEPTION
So the o-so-mighty sun horse, which has the wisdoms of tens of centuries is just exceptionally continued to eat cakes, not even bothering that the alicorn she herself picked and accended starts to act completely different. Neither she gives a flying fart about her evil sister reappearing and teleports to the battlefield just right when she is defeated. Now I will leave you to write another fantasy how she was absolutely useless in every single conflict, but these six seasons were purely an exception spree.

> probably
Could we maybe stop here, before we assume her countless victories and take unmentioned as granted?

> she is defeated as though those were the only indicators of Celestia's competence
Say, are you familiar with the story of paid shitposters in Olginio? Because your arguments resemble theirs and based only on your OPINION, not the plot.
>>
>>30892444
>line by line reply
>reddit spacing
Autism/10
Is this an anime forum in the mid-2000's? If you're in an argument with someone don't cut out sentences from their post and respond to each of them line by line. Write out a fucking paragraph.
>>
>>30892547
Forgive me for being too old to fit your phone screen reading habits, but I write as I see comfortable. I dont see a problem with spacing as my monitor gives enough vertical space, and I do not ask anyone to read that if you're not my interlocutor.
>>
>>30892547
>Clear formatting that makes it easier to read and understand
>Reddit spacing

And this guy calls others autists
>>
>>30892618
It's not about the ability to read it. It's about being able to construct a coherent argument. Breaking it up into pieces only makes you focus on smaller bits instead of the whole picture and leaves it convenient for you to leave out lines you don't/can't address. It overbloats the response to make it look like it holds more substance than it actually does and eventually devolves into asinine nitpicking. If two guys start seriously going back and forth picking and dissecting every segment of each other's lines it gets to the point where it's not just one argument anymore, it turns into dozens of little arguments about unimportant shit compared to what you were originally focused on.
>>
>>30892715
I am sorry for putting you into a great trouble of READING, that was rude of me. I understand that not everyone can hold the tiny line of main subject in their heads and focus on more than one thing. It sure must look unimportant in your eyes, but next time when you try to mix up all kinds of wrong into one pile of nonsense, hoping that others would address just one bit of it, you will be prepared that this won't work.
>>
>>30890975
What do you have against the use of contractions?
>>
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>>30890937
>“Boops are magical, Master. Daddy always said that, and he told me that they are a show of love and trust.”
>>
>>30890975
Except for the part where Anon puts his hand where him not should say that me liked the story of redemption from a black knight to a white knight, I'm sorry for Cloudy and his parents but there is still a bit of hope that his future is blessed, it was a good brief history, and worth reading
>>
>>30889872
Yeah, figuring that out will be her top priority if she wants a chance of remaining on the run.

As to the 'dominant species' bit it's more of a was the dominant species than an is. She's currently living in the woods hiding from wild animals so she's not the dominant anything.

>>30891318
>>30891230
>>30890863
>>30890853
She'll not get away unscathed.
>>
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slave barbies when
>>
Can we geld Celestia?
She seems a pretty big dick.
>>
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>>30888735
Sorry but that is all I got.
I don't know a story arc for this but the character of Celestia in slavery is very interesting.
Maybe she gets some confidence back, stops blaming herself and works for the betterment of poners with Anons help.
Dunno...

>>30888733
pretty much this

>>30889255
It is basically just my headcanon but I think she would heavily blame herself for not stoping the enslavement of her race.
She always got messed up by villains only to be saved by other people, asking herself why she even is the ruler.
She only defeated Discord with the help of her sister.
Years later she banished her to the moon.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i7PQ9IO-7fU
She has the fassade of the allmighty ruler but inside is weak and vulnerable.

If she can't protect anyone, not even her sister, is she fit to rule?
Was it her fault everything fell apart?
If every decision she takes leads to sadness maybe she should not be in charge.

While she can't stop herself from sticking up for her ponies, her being not in charge is a nice change for her.
If something goes wrong she doesn't have to blame herself but her owner.

Thats just what I think a enslaved Celestia should/could be like,
>>
>>30893459
not gonna lie, I would do some dark shit to see some quality Sunset green pop up sometime. Maybe with all this Celestia love lately someda another sunny horse will get her shot
>>
>>30894024
*quality SLAVE Sunset green
>>
>>30893957
See, I take things the exact opposite way: She's a masterful manipulator, a top-tier planner who knows her ponies very well and can play the longest of long games to set things in her favor. Does she regret the clear mistakes that she's had made? Absolutely, but they're the stark minority. If anything, it's a statement on her skill as a planner - and with her foresight ability - that she can string a series of seemingly bizarre and nonsensical choices together, even allow antagonists to reach every step up to absolute victory, only to pluck out the single path that leads to victory.

The memories of the ponies she couldn't protect - Luna, namely - only drive her to do better, to set every piece in place.

The strange things is that I come to a similar conclusion as you do:
>It is basically just my headcanon but I think she would heavily blame herself for not stoping the enslavement of her race.
I think this would be totally accurate, because she'd be questioning "what went wrong here?" Of all the times she played her game perfectly, what fucked up this time? Did she finally mess up and make a bad call, despite all of her skill and ability? Or was it simply to late before she saw the way things were going, and playing the long game of slavery followed by eventual emancipation is the best of a roster of horrible options?
>>
>>30892679
I keep seeing this Reddit spacing meme, but I don't get it. Is separating thoughts and paragraphs practiced exclusively by Reddit now? If we're making a long post, are we supposed to cram it all into one giant block of text to avoid "Reddit spacing?"
>>
>>30894087
if I understand it correctly, 'reddit spacing' refers to when they're over saturating the post with breaklines to the point where more than half its volumes from empty line spaces
>>
>>30894099
No, it's from when you put TWO line spaces between paragraphs instead of one

So this is fine.


This is not fine.
>>
>>30894052
>She's a masterful manipulator
I really dislike Chess-master type characters and a small part of me dies every time Celly is portrayed as one.
>>
>>30894211
Out of curiosity, why?

I mean, obviously we're of differing opinions and each to his own and stuff, but I'm actually curious what makes you dislike the character archetype so much.
>>
>>30894259
Not that Anon, but I'm not a fan of them either. They can be the most pretentious excuse for a writer to feel 'smart' as it can get. The worst examples I can name are Light, Lelouch, and Moriarty from the new Sherlock series but almost every chess-master type character I've seen have only had their intelligence implied rather than outright shown.

The two exceptions that come to mind are Grand Admiral Thrawn, who does have some great strategies and actually makes you feel smarter watching him, and Joseph Joestar, who has amazing strategies but is at least willing to admit >50% are bullshit levels of luck and he just makes look like he has them all planned out.
>>
>>30894259
Its about how they are often portrayed.
Aloof and above the situation, working towards the goal so distant noone else can even see it. As the name suggests, it all a game to them. They sit at the sidelines while worthless pawns die directed by them. It gets even better when they sacrifice some of their 'pieces' in order to make the plan work.

I guess just the thought of somebody treating life as a game and everybody around them as pawns to be sacrificed towards some goal revolts me to the point of nausea.
>>
>>30894329
Along those lines, most writers don't seem to be able to handle the impact of a character who can see everything coming and adjust for any circumstance. If you make a character so smart they can outmaneuver everyone else, they quickly become Mary Sue archetypes who take the agency away from most other characters. Usually from the author making everyone's IQ drop significantly once they get involved.They usually come hand in hand with other common tropes such as: instant like-ability; and extreme competence in a manner of areas, often surpassing characters who claim to be good at those things.

They also often reflect a naive and simplistic world view of a teenager who thinks they are very very smart and should be recognized for their genius.

Not saying the character can't be done right, but its a common trope that a lot of writers trip and break their face on.
>>
>>30894052
>playing the long game of slavery followed by eventual emancipation

This is how I think Cadance of Slaveventure should be written. She's the most influential of the immortal alicorns, she should be thinking on a 500-1000 year timeframe and using her subtle power to make the best for both species. Just like her hero would, if she were not being dissected in a government lab or wherever she ended up in that story. Cadance is having a rough time at the moment, but she'll recover her balance.
>>
>>30894196
I have never seen anyone on 4chan post with the two line spacing like that yet they still get called out for reddit spacing
>>
>>30894645
I think that position makes less sense for Cadance than it does for Celestia. Celestia has already lived millenia, the idea that she might feel the need to give up on the current generation ever being free and instead planning on how to free them centuries from now is more sensible to her because of her long life span, even if it means more suffering in the short term and great blow dealt to their current culture.

Cadance may be immortal now but she has not lived more than a few decades. She wouldn't be concerned with ponies born generations from now who have no memory of Equestria or what it was, she would be concerned with the ponies around her in the present who have lost everything and how to free them ASAP rather than planning for their childrens' children.
>>
>>30894668
I think, in particular, what drives home that point is her family. Cadance has a husband who will most certainly not live for centuries. She has friends who won't live for centuries. Celestia has lost all of her original peers sans Luna and has likely grown numb to the pain of constantly out living her loved ones with the epochs, but Cadance still has very many strong emotional, personal ties that would keep her focused on the now, or at most the near future, more than any sort of long game.
>>
>>30893001
I tend to use formal writing for narrative (hence no contractions), informal writing for speech and thoughts (where you will see them).
It's just a style that I picked up from school, and this format is what I was taught to use.

>>30891159
Would be happy if you can point those out, and why it felt that way.
> I am always looking to improve.

>>30891211
>>30893389
Thank you for your kind words. I'm glad you liked it.
> I personally like redemption story arcs. It gives me a little warm and fuzzy feeling inside when I read stories like these, and I want to give readers of my work the same feeling. Guess I'm a sucker for nice endings.

>>30891911
>>30893025
I hope you enjoyed the sappy sweetness. Cloudy Spinel is a good and innocent little filly.
>>
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>>30894912
>I hope you enjoyed the sappy sweetness. Cloudy Spinel is a good and innocent little filly.

>>30891911
>>30893025

It was worth it
>>
>>30894465
>>30894668
Hey, hold up a sec though: Has there been any indication whatsoever that Cadance is immortal in CYOS? Did I miss it, because I don't remember one?
>>
>>30894967
>>30894967
I don't think it's come up explicitly, but don't we assume that Cadance and Flurry will live until they die, like Celestia and Luna? That's just part of the alicorn package, right?
>>
>>30895051

Everyone lives until they die.
>>
>>30895069
But not everyone has a finite 'best before' date. For alicorns, presumably including Cadance, it's more open-ended. But she still has to stay on her hooftips, even for her death is only ever a heartbeat away!

As for the ones who point out how young she is, that's the character development she needs to do. Slavery has ripped away Shiny and most of her mortal friends from the Crystal Empire, Celestia and Luna are unavailable. The species (both of them, really) need her to get her head in the game and be a real Princess now. Even if "now" is more than a few generations long.
>>
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>>30895051
>live until they die
>>
>don't we assume that Cadance and Flurry will live until they die
anon...
>>
>>30894329
Huh, fair enough reasoning I suppose. I'd quibble over examples, but that's neither here nor there.

>>30894399
Fair enough here too. I will say one of the reasons I like Celestia like that is just because she voids the 'aloof and all just a game' stereotype: Nothing could be further from the truth; she cares for each and every one of her ponies, and that is exactly what drives her to plan for them like that.
>>
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>>30896354
>>
>>30896816
Pretty blue eyes for one awful cat
>>
>>30896876
ur taste is shit and you should feel ashamed of yourself
>>
>>30896889
Mmm.... nope
>>
>late night bump
>>
>>30897647
> tfw it's half past 13 here
>>
So why has there been so much talk on Celestia?
>>
>>30897747
tl;dr - someone likes her and does not like wnen others don't.
>>
>>30897757
Is this where I say I like the idea of her being spayed, dehorned, wings cut off, and made to live like an earth horse?
All as part of an atyempt at breeding pony horses.
>>
>>30897775
Yeah, some white knight started talking about why oh why should you do it to his beloved and someone else replied that she's not everyeone's waifu and she's not that special in /spg/. You can guess the rest.
>>
>>30897783
Somebody simed a story of Celestia becoming a slave.
>>
We miss you, Britanon
>>
>>30897913
I'm sorry I've been a lazy bugger but I'm uploading tonight
>>
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>>30897747
You can just scroll up to find out, dude.
Someone wrote a story about Celestia, and then there was an argument about if Celestia was a good ruler or not; in which both sides walked away butthurt. So, what usually happens when /spg/ discusses anything.
>>
>>30897775
>spayed
>attempt at breeding
You failed before you even begun.
>>
>>30898014
Clearly you never worked in government before.
>>
>>30897927
Maiden Voyage when
>>
>>30897927
GIVE ME THE UPDATE! I KNOW YOU'RE HIDING IT SOMEWHERE!
>>
I want to read about a doomed slave uprising that only gets them and their owners brutally killed.
>>
>>30898235
>doomed uprising
Autumn and Comet sidestory! Those gluefarmers are very security conscious, but it's a low margin business and there's only so much they can afford to do. There will always be an opportunity for ponies able to organize and willing to risk. I doubt Slaveventure would mind someone taking over these characters...
>>
>clear skies never got her cummies
>>
>>30898371
We should give Steel Steed cummies.
Maybe she will be less of a bitch then.
>>
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Applejack is a sex-slave and a broodmother.
>>
>>30898576
I thought her whole reproductive system was replaced with a hard drive of pony pr0n. Giving her cummies is done via command line interface now.
>>
>>30898596
>as though you could be hung as a stallion and notice
I want to cure the crazy pegasus using the HMD
>>
>>30898371
Actually she did.
What is more interesting, was new landscape finished?
>>
>>30898729
Hasn't been updated. :( It left off with Master Anon snuggling with Applejack on the couch after the tornado, after she almost had another breakdown.
>>
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>>30898595

>Anon acquired Applejack to take care of the house while he and his wife serve their hectic work and exclusive social life.

>Anon's children spend more time with Applejack that parents who spend most of their free time attending gala dinners, art exhibitions and all kinds of social excuses.

>One day the younger son calls 'Mama' to Applejack in front of Anon friends.

>The Wife, angry and jealous makes Applejack is brought into a center for dangerous ponies under false allegations of violence against children, Anon does nothing about it.

>Applejack is away from her 'children' and never seen again.
>>
>>30898753
FUUUHUUCK YOOOOUUUHUHUHUUUU

DELET THISSS
>>
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>>30898753

>The marriage fails and after a sad divorce the mom takes custody of her children and sends them to a private school, she not have time to care for them because their professional and private lives take precedence over family life.

>Childrens grow up resenting their parents' indifference to her feelings and miss to her mother pony.

>When the older have 16 get part-time job as an assistant in one of the detention centers ponies.

>Through his work finds that Applejack but demonstrated excellent behavior and great social skills was vetoed any possibility of adoption to a human family, he even heard a rumor that someone from outside payment to the investigator in charge of his case for Applejack I could never get another chance.

>Connecting the dots on concludes that parents are responsible for bribery and chides both parents, then confirmed his suspicions when the mother confesses that she was responsible, blaming Anon for bringing Applejack to home to do their job and she defends the excuse. . to protect others from a wild animal
>>
>>30898873
>Enraged by the cruel actions of his parents, the eldest son leaves the house for Applejack, after two years of searching in the system discovers she was sent to a farm outside which is where they send the ponies that they can not be adopted but demonstrate good behavior, using all her money Young Anon travels to the place only to discover sadly that Applejack. . . . just died.

>Overwhelmed by grief and helplessness Young Anon feels that her mother has failed, that if he had done more could have saved her from a life of suffering, but workers will have during your stay Applejack was the most courageous and admirable working pony who have had, inspiring everyone with his extraordinary work ethic and honesty, the ponies that live there remembered as Applejack used to tell stories of their time by taking care two foals human and not a day passed that did not remember fondly
>>
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>>30899008
>Moved by the memory Young Anon decides to leave when one of the workers speaks:

>'And now who will take care of his daughter?'

His. . . . daughter?

>'Yes, the little Applegold, this is not the place for a little filly, while she had her mommy there was no problem, but now that Applejack is not there will have time to take care of her, I guess we should send it to one of the centers of help but I doubt that there receives the attention that needs a pony so small '

>'Poor filly, losing her mother was devastating to her, the truth is that I do not think anyone knows how she feels'
>>
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>>30899072

>with those last words the truth enlighten the heart of Young Anon. .

I will do it.

> "Excuse me?"

Applegold lost her mother but still has two brothers. . . . and although I take all life makes it happy

>And he realized that although the people we love will, love and teachings will live in our lives and in the lives we touch all creating a great symphony of life.

>Together. . .

>In Harmony

FIN


Do not kill me, I just wanted to keep alive the thread
>>
>>30899128
I did not want apple horse to die
>>
>>30899188
Could have been worse. Imagine if the kid found her at the facility for dangerous ponies, only to find that she'd been broken by having her new family ripped away yet again - unable to form a relationship with anyone new. She's on the list for euthanasia - not because she's dangerous, but just because she's a drain on resources to keep around.

So the kid tries to shove through the paperwork to keep her alive until he can heal her, but no one particularly cares about just one broken pony and he's one person working against an entire business that's set up for profit, not for ponies' wellbeing. He just wasn't fast enough, and can only stare at the empty cell that once was Applejack's.
>>
>>30899217
Yesh.
Appul is for the sads.
>>
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>>30899223
That's a damn lie, spread by those filthy oranges.
Apple is love. Apple is life.
>>
>>30899188
Me too, but in this particular story focuses on the teachings we receive from others and as we honor their memory sharing the same value to others peoples, the brothers had good reasons to become in bastards with parents who had, more focused on their own achievements than on the welfare of their children, the father acquired Applejack because the ponies were seen as a toy for their children and cheaper servitude, but the honest and nice personality of Applejack won their hearts and they they lived happily hearing of their adventures and experiences in Equestria, only when the parents were confronted before their 'friends' of their failures was that in fact they interest to them, but in fact they only wanted to cover their negligence blaming to pony
>>
>>30899282
Appul is for snuggle
>>
>>30899282
Appul will never see her little sister or the little girl in the hospital. :(

Landscape, plz
>>
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>>30899471
love, protect, care for, learn from his teachings and enjoy its excellent desserts apple

Applejack is the best pony
>>
>>30899492
You're not even wrong there friendo
>>
>>30898654
Sorry Anon, she only accepts HDMI now.
>>
>>30899282
Apples go with oak allergies.
Citrus is needed to live and the key to British dominance by preventing scurvy.
Appul horse should be spayed and turned into a stallion so she can then be gelded into a pathetic docile slave.
>>
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>>30899544
>>
>>30899548
I want to say this gives me ideas.
I really do.
But its not.
Add more or something and I will work with it.
>>
>>30899562
You should be spayed
>>
>>30899999
>>
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>>30899008
I don wanna apul to diiiiiieeeee
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>>30899282
I feel like Appul wouldn't be a good, you know, SLAVE unless she's broken. The process of breaking her would be something I wouldn't want to do, given how stubborn she is. She's a hard worker, but you have to earn her loyalty.

I feel like I'd need to get her rear end well acquainted with my belt for quite some time. A lot of work, and I don't know if I would be fit to do it since I just want her to be happy. It would be a big balance between disciplining bad behavior and showing her love for it to work out.
>>
>>30893445
can you manage 3 stories at the same time?
>>
>>30900159
'Staying out of trouble' is on hiatus white i write 'the chase', so really it's just 2. I don't think it will be a problem.
>>
Guess I owe you lads an update since I haven't uploaded in like 2 weeks eh?

Be Lyra
>Awoken violently by the nightmares that plague your sleep you sat bolt upright in bed
>You thought you could hear a noise coming from down the corridor
>Your ears perked and you could make out the sound of gentle sobbing
>Quietly you climbed out of Anon's bed and walked towards the sound which was coming from the kitchen
>You steeled your nerves before opening the door, remembering full well that there was a dead pony on the table along with copious amounts of her blood everywhere
>You took a deep breath and pushed the door open
>Two things immediately became apparent- Sun Striker's body was gone and Anon was crumpled on the floor sobbing brokenly
>He didn't notice you enter, which allowed you to take in the sight a little while longer as you approached him
>Anon was in a bad shape, stained with blood, dirt and sweat and reeking of death
>The vodka bottle that he had offered to Sun Striker now lay empty beside him and in his hands was clasped a small scrap of paper
>"Anon..." You whispered as you got close to him
>His body stiffened and he looked up at you with red unfocused eyes
>He looked... scared?
>Almost as if he wanted to run away from you and hide
>"Anon it's me"
>He trembled as he opened his mouth to speak
"Y- you hate me..."
>You couldn't really tell if that was a statement or a question, but either way it was a notion you wanted to dispel
>"No I-"
"I killed her Lyra! I shot a huge fucking hole in her chest and she bled to death! I'm a fucking monster!"
>You were speechless at his sudden outburst, taking a short step back in surprise
>Anon seemed to notice your fear, and just like that his anger evaporated as he slumped down even further into the puddle of Sun Striker's blood that he was laid in
>He covered his face with one hand as if he couldn't bear to look at you and his other arm outstretched, offering you the scrap of paper
>>
>>30900537
"Look at what I've done Lyra, what I've destroyed. I'm a fucking monster..." He muttered
>You turned it over and took it in your hoof to inspect it
>You let out a short gasp at the family photo, recognising Sun Striker straight away and seeing her parents beaming down at her
>Your gasp became a sob as tears began to fall down your cheeks
>Then you looked back up at Anon who seemed like a broken shell of himself
>You did the only thing you could think to do and wrapped him in a tight hug
>He tried to fight you and push you off, but in his exhausted state the most he could do was lightly claw at your fur
>"It wasn't your fault Anon" You whispered into his ear as you embraced him
>"Don't say that, don't fucking say that..."
>He hissed between clenched teeth
>"It wasn't your fault, you didn't mean to kill her, you tried to save her"
"I put two fucking bullets in her" He sobbed
>You held him as he cried, and by now he too was clinging on to you tightly, like a crying foal you thought
>"You were only trying to protect yourself Anon, protect me. Nopony can blame you for that, I don't think even Sun Striker took it too personally"
"I just... I can't believe I killed her..." He wept
>He let out some more choking sobs as he held you, and you could practically feel his whole body trembling
>You held him until he began to calm down, his crying becoming ragged breathing with the odd hiccup and whimper
>You wanted to stay there comforting him for a while longer but there was an important question nagging at you
>"A- Anon..." You said gently
>"Where's Sun Striker?"
>Your voice quavered as you asked the question, you were dreading the answer
>Anon clung to you a little tighter, composing himself to speak
"I buried her... I- In the garden, by the ridge..."
>He heaved a heavy sigh before he spoke
>>
>>30900257
>white i write
Are you a white male or a white mare?
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>>30900795
Shit.

I am not a horse. I promise.
>>
>>30900735
"I- I figured it was the only decent spot- the way the sun catches it when it rises in the morning- I wanted her to be able to see it every day. Maybe she'll think of her home, her family. Maybe one day the war will end and our worlds can make peace a- and her parents can come and see her and get their closure"
>His words were mumbled and somewhat slurred by the alcohol, but you could feel the emotion and the hurt in his voice as tears streamed down his cheeks
"A- and you can go home too..." he whispered
>That caught you off guard
>You hadn't given much thought to what you'd do when the war ended
>You always just sort of assumed you'd die on this planet before it ceased
>But if the war ended, would you go home if you could?
>What would even remain of your home?
>Already most of it was in ruins and most of the close friends or family you knew were dead
>And what about Anon? Could you simply abandon him?
>Looking at him now, a bloody broken mess on the floor, your mind was made up
>He'd dragged you out of the depths of desperation and misery and you would repay him in kind
>"Come on Anon" You cooed gently
>"On your feet, lets get you cleaned up OK?"
>He gave you a tiny nod of acceptance and you pushed yourself under his arm so he could use you as a support to get up
>Your muscles strained under his weight as he leaned on you heavily, but slowly he climbed to his feet
>He was swaying and shaking quite worryingly as he stood there, once again assaulted by the sight of the bloodbath that was his kitchen
>Your slight tug at his sleeve was enough to pull his mind away and you lead him through his house to the en-suite shower in his room
>You would prefer it if he had a bath, but drunk people and baths don't mix too good
>As you entered the small bathroom Anon managed to catch his reflection in the mirror
>He stopped, staring in disbelief at himself
>Even his inebriated swaying was barely perceptible
>>
>>30900848
>He brought his hands to his face, feeling the crusted blood mixed with grime and sweat, his jaw slack
>He looked completely shell shocked, something which both of you had seen plenty of, and you gave another tug at his sleeve to bring him back to reality
>"Anon, we need to get your clothes off"
>He gave a weak nod, hearing but not seeming to listen as he still stood there zoned out
>"Come on" You said gently, giving him a firmer tug that brought him down into a sitting position on the floor
>With great effort you managed to tug his clothes off, and you found yourself really wishing you still had your magic
>How can belt buckles possibly be so complex and tricky to undo?
>What happens when they are busting for the toilet?
>Your cheeks flushed a little at seeing Anon in the nude, but your mind was too focused on the task of getting him cleaned to allow any room for embarrassment
>Besides, you had seen a human's junk before, just under vastly different circumstances
>You chucked his ruined clothes into a pile in the corner before turning the water on
>You waited until the temperature was right and then ushered Anon into the shower
>He was too plastered to stay standing for very long, and instead sat hunched over whilst you cleaned him off with the shower head clenched in your mouth
>There wasn't much room in the shower, and it was rather awkward having to climb over and around him which wasn't helped by his lack of cooperation
>The water ran a reddish-brown colour as it cascaded over his body and through his matted hair, washing the horrors of the day from his body
>You grimaced as the filthy water in the basin began lapping at your hooves and seeping into your fur, but pressed on regardless
>Anon was once again sobbing as he watched Sun Striker's blood run from his body and gurgle down the drain, and you watched his back heave and shudder in his hunched over position
>>
>>30900922
>You remembered when you were first brought to Anon's home and he had bathed you in much the same way
>How you had stared appalled at the water as the blood and dirt from your body had soaked out, reminding you of all the suffering you had been through
>How much it hurt seeing how much of a state you were in, how disgusting and wretched you had become
>You understood how he felt now, but more so you understood the compassion he had felt when he took you in
>To see another creature so degraded and repulsed with themself was painful to witness
>He barely acknowledged your touch as you moved him around to clean him, simply lost in his own mind as his thoughts consumed him
>You took the bottle of shampoo and began to massage some into his scalp with your hooves, noticing the lather discolour as it cleansed more of the dirt matting his hair
>You also used some scented body wash, scrubbing gently at his skin to make sure you cleaned him thoroughly
>Anon still sat there like a sack of potatoes, sniffling and occasionally mumbling to himself
>You began to rinse him down again, washing the soap off his body and also noticing that the water running into the basin was finally clear rather than brown
>When all the soap was washed from him you decided it was time to get him dried up and of to bed so you shut off the water
>"Lets dry you up Anon" You said gently as you lifted his head up with a hoof
>His eyes focused as they looked into yours, and he actually seemed to gain some clarity and awareness
"O- Ok Lyra, th- thankyou"
>Then his eyes darted away from your gaze again, and he was back to looking at the ground
>You laid out a dry towel on the floor for him to sit on and then draped one around him
>Drying him properly was tricky, but thankfully humans aren't covered in fur like ponies are so it could have been worse
>Again you discarded the towel in the pile in the corner and went to fetch Anon some clean boxers to wear to bed
>>
>>30901051
>To your surprise he managed to put them on himself, though he did put them on backwards
>You then lead Anon to his bed, tucking him in like a mother would with her foal, then decided to curl up next to him after you turned off the light
>You were sure you'd both be glad for the company tonight, even if the feeling was unspoken
>You snuggled up to him, laying your head on his chest and listening to his quiet breathing and his steady heart beat
>Focusing on him made it easier to push the bad thoughts away that were sure to overwhelm you if you were left alone
>You laid there for a while although sleep never came, and you were pretty sure Anon was awake too
>This was confirmed a moment later when he broke the silence with a question that made your blood run cold and your stomach lurch
"Lyra, who's BonBon?"
>>
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>>30901094
Well there we go, the fruits of my laziness the past 2 weeks. The reverse shower bit was quite fun to write and I'm also looking forward to the next part which I've left on a cliffhanger purely because I feel like being a dick and also because i couldn't be arsed writing it yet.

Pastebin for it is here:
https://pastebin.com/psQ4gdXJ

No idea when the when the next update will be since I'm moving into my uni accom on Monday and I don't know how long it will take me to get my shit sorted, but hopefully within one or two weeks.
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>>30901124
very nice work.
>>
I just realized that CYOS finally had its first bath scene.

For a while there, it hadn't kept the tradition. Now it's official tho
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>>30900802
>Not a horse
>Implying its not just another slave wanting to pass as a human in the interwebs
Sure, keep believing that
>>
Clear skies is the best cock sock
>>
>>30880844

> Finding Bon Bon is harder than you'd thought it would be.
> The mare is not in the barracks she had been assigned.
> On a hunch, you check the separate barracks Lyra had been assigned to and find them similarly empty.
> Questioning the overseers for both their assigned workplaces finally reveals a lead.
> Hence it is you who is laying in wait this time, curled amid reams of deflated pillows waiting for cloudstuffing.
> Just like she had done so many times you hold off until the door opens and Bon Bon slips into the back room before saying anything.
> Unfortunately, Bon Bon's senses are somewhat more tuned than yours.
> She goes stock-still the second she steps in, nostrils flaring.
> Oh well; you roll from the stack of fabric and land on your hooves, strutting towards her.
"So, this is what it feels like. Y'know, when you'd always surprise me by sneaking into my quarters or something."
> "Thunderlane."
> Her greeting is more of a growl than anything else.
"Hello, Bon Bon."
> "What do you want, Thunderlane? You going to drag us off for being back here together? You'll have to find a new reason; our time is up. We can see each other again."
"I know. I was part of that same business, remember?"
> "Yeah, but you weren't told you can't see-"
> Huffing softly, Bon Bon lashes her tail.
> "Nevermind. Can we have a few moments to ourselves, or does Anonymous need another scapegoat for something?"
> "Bonnie? What's wrong?"
> ...ah.
> Your next question is answered prematurely as a second head pushes through the doorway just behind her; Lyra immediately lays widening eyes on you, her mouth forming an 'O'.
"Hey, Lyra."
> "Hey, Thunderlane."
> A second later, more awkwardly:
> "How's Rumble?"
"Bro's doing alright. He, uh... he's been feeling it a bit hard ever since Mocha Cream was... y'know."
> "Yeah... tell him, I, uh... I'm sorry that all happened. It wasn't right."
> Good to know Lyra's head is screwed on straight then.
"I will."
>>
>>30902086

> Another awkward pause, during which Bon Bon continues glaring daggers at you and which Lyra breaks by scuffing a hoof nervously on the floor and lowering her voice to a tiny whisper.
> "Um... I think - I think I should just go."
"It's alright Lyra. I just wanted to talk; this won't take too long and I'll leave you be after that."
> "Yeah, let me just kick this colt's flank-"
> "No, really. I'll, uh - I'll see you later Bonnie!"
> With a burst of white-and-teal tail and the fading of hoofbeats, she is gone - leaving you alone with her Earth Pony friend.
> "Lyra, wai-"
> Whirling back around, Bon Bon jabs a hoof in your direction - ears pinned all the way back and tail lashing furiously.
> "Now look at what you did! Four months, Thunderlane! Four months we were kept from seeing each other. Now we're finally back together, and you can't even give us a little time to be back together-"
"I didn't actually say anything! I wanted her to stay! Besides, the way you sneak around I bet you've been seeing her anyway."
> "Yeah, well-"
> Face cycling through multiple expressions, Bon Bon eventually settles on a narrow-eyed grimace.
> It's more than enough answer for you.
> "Whatever. Talk fast, Thunderlane."
> Getting straight to the point?
> You can do that.
"Why'd you push Cadance to go throw herself at Anonymous' feet? Do you have any idea of what you've done?"
> Bon Bon snorts angrily.
> "You staked me out to ask about that?"
"Yes! I didn't want to make a scene about it."
> "...fine. I don't like that she's been holding herself - and you - up as something special for us. Dealing with Autumn, Comet, Windy Winters, and Chrysocolla should have been our job, not yours."
"That-?!"
> "Yes, that! Thunderlane, I know you mean well but ultimately you're working for Anonymous. Ponies get turned over to him, they're sold off to die. Now, we wouldn't have been easy on them either - but I don't like that. Not one bit."
"That wasn't exactly part of her plan, you know!"
>>
>>30902094

> Dropping to her haunches, Bon Bon nods.
> "I guessed. But in the end, you - and Cadance - are working for a slaver, and she's trying to make you all something... normal. Get ponies to accept what you're doing. So she comes to me talking about how she'd actually screwed up and imperiled all of us, wondering if it would rile everypony up if she took a hefty punishment for it..."
"You told her that she should take a punishment just like she'd been issuing out."
> Another sharp roll of Bon Bon's eyes.
> "I told her that she could either be one of us - and take the same punishment she gave us - or she could be the princess above us and take on the heavier load that comes with. She made her choice."
> Groaning, you raise a hoof to rub at your forehead.
"She's not trying to hold herself over us, Bon Bon! And she is still our princess, even if she doesn't wear a crown!"
> "Not when she's working for Anonymous, she isn't. And neither are you protecting us when you do his work either!"
"Oh, so I just should've let your mob chase down those ponies instead?"
> "Well maybe if you had, Chrysocolla wouldn't be dea-"
> To her credit, Bon Bon manages to bite her tongue and cut the words off before they can finish.
> Wings snapping out with a puff of air, you still rise up - ready to spit a furious comeback.
> Only to hesitate when she stares shamefully at the floor.
> "I'm sorry, Thunderlane. That wasn't right."
> Biting your own tongue you manage to force your wings down, then drop to a seated position.
"...fine."
> Instead of going on with the argument, Bon Bon rises to approach you - lifting a hoof to rest on your side.
> "I mean it, Thunderlane. I didn't mean to..."
"No, you did. You and everyone else who's been asking me."
> Barking a short, bitter laugh you shake your head.
"And maybe you're right. If you'd gone after her, Chrysocolla wouldn't have been as afraid. But everyone forgets, every time they ask me I ask myself the same thing ten times more."
>>
>>30902110

> Nickering gently, Bon Bon brushes her muzzle against your shoulder.
> "I'm sorry. I don't hate you, Thunderlane. Or Cadance."
"Kinda figured I'd be getting a hoof in the snout instead of an explanation if you did."
> "Yeah. I just - I want everypony to remember what he's doing to us. He's making all of this... normal to us. Turning ponies over to be branded and sold away. That's not right. Tartarus - I want her back the way I knew her. When she always stood up for us."
> Turning, you brush your own muzzle against Bon Bon's shoulder.
> Perhaps unsurprisingly, she smells like candy.
> "I thought this might remind Cadance a bit of where she actually stands. And I knew Anonymous wouldn't hurt her. Not like he did to Corona. He relies on her to much."
"That's - cold."
> Bon Bon draws back from you with a shake of her head.
> "We're living in a cold place now, Thunderlane. She is the one who gave Crescent Moon a whipping."
"I take it you were pushing Crescent to tell Cadance the same?"
> "No, Crescent had her mind pretty much made up on her own."
"Good. She's a filly, and eager to have someone to follow. No offense, Bon Bon, but being lead on by someone looking to kick back at Anonymous already hurt her once."
> "I know. I said I didn't push her infto anything."
"No, but you didn't exactly talk her down either?"
> "Am I supposed to be your advocate, Thunderlane?"
> Bon Bon shrugs.
> "Cadance came to us, asked our opinions, and if we would back up her decision in public. I answered as I would."
> She's at least partially right.
> You should be angry with Cadance for asking the opinion of ponies who were sure to back her up.
> But at the same time...
"You really don't understand what you've done, Bon Bon. Cadance hasn't come back."
> "What?!"
> Eyes wide, she rears up onto three hooves.
"I don't know what he did to her, but she's going to be 'off duty' for a few days at least. Maybe up to a week. The announcement's going out tomorrow."
>>
>>30902113

> Slumping back down, Bon Bon shakes her head nervously.
> "No - no, I didn't mean to..."
"Well, you did. I agree with you, I don't think he'll really injure her. But in the future I suggest you really consider the implications of your choices before making them."
> Bon Bon nods, but keeps her eyes firmly on the floor.
"Now, you want to make up for this? Gather up all your friends and make sure they don't do anything stupid in because of this announcement. If you're so certain Cadance won't be hurt, make sure they're certain too."
> "Yes... Okay, yes! I can do that."
"Good."
> This time it is your turn to reach out and place a hoof to her shoulder.
"I don't hate you either, Bon Bon. But I'm pretty pissed you encouraged Cadance to go beg herself to be tortured."
> "Mmmm."
> Scuffing at the floor with a hoof, the mare looks away again.
> "I... still think she deserved something. Can't be responsible without a higher cost too. She took a whipping and stayed apart from her filly after the escape, you remember?"
> Before you can answer, she keeps going:
> "But - I get what you mean. So I'll make sure nopony does anything more stupid. We can do that."
"Thank you."
> ...
> You finish your dinner quickly that night, so that you can slip from the mess hall quickly and be waiting by the door when Vapor Trail emerges.
> Quickly spotting you, she extends an ivory wing to wave enthusiastically:
> "Thunderlane! Hey!"
"Hey, Vapor."
> Approaching, you nuzzle her gently the mare and softly blow from your nostrils as she meets you nose to nose.
> "Long day?"
"Not the best, but... I think I did as much as I can."
> "Hmm."
> Brushing her nose up along your cheek, Vapor nibbles gently at your ear.
"Hey! Quit that; it tickles."
> Swatting her playfully with a wing, you dismiss a rather lewd catcall from a distance with a roll of your eyes.
"You want to come back to my quarters for a bit?"
> "I'd love that, Thunderlane."
>>
>>30902119

> Side by side you walk, flanks pressed together and a wing extending over her withers.
> The days had been steadily growing warmer, but the nights still held a stark chill - Spring irregularly making itself known rather than a timely arrival following a well-planned Winter Wrap-Up.
> Your breath steams into the night air, the only accompaniment to an otherwise silent walk.
> Vapor is the first to break it:
> "So, Thunder... how is - well, everything? The camp?"
"It's... better, I think. Even with Cadance being... away. I don't think Anonymous is really going to do anything to her."
> Thank you, Bon Bon, for that idea.
> "Really? Why not?"
"They're closer than it can seem. He relies on her, and Flurry Heart too."
> "If you say so..."
"I do. And aside from that, there really isn't anything else going wrong. All that's happened, with... it's kind of woken everypony up. Like, the museum. It showed us we can have some part of our life back."
> "Without fighting."
"Without fighting. Have you seen the museum?"
> "Yes. It doesn't change we're still slaves, still their 'property'... but it's nice."
"Yeah."
> Arriving at your quarters you unlock the door and slip in, quickly shutting it against the sharpening chill.
"Well - welcome to my humble castle, Lady Trail."
> Vapor snickers softly, immediately heading to leap up onto the bed without hesitation.
> "Quit it. Keep talking like that, you're going to sound like some prissy unicorn."
> Unable to keep the grin from your own lips, you wander on over to the bed as well.
"Plus, it's not much of a palace. Actually-"
> You look around the single room, taking in the bare bulb on the ceiling, the cracked walls, the barebones unpainted furniture and creaking bed...
"-just about the farthest thing from."
> "Oh, shush."
> Leaning over, Vapor plants a soft kiss on your cheek.
>>
>>30902129

> "Long as you're here to help keep me up, this could be the grandest mansion in all of Cloudsdale to me. Now get up here; it's chilly and this blanket only does so much."
> Partly to hide the deep flush showing even through your black coat and partly because - well, what kind of stallion is going to reject that offer? - you immediately do jump up.
> Carefully stepping around her, you sink down to your belly just behind Vapor and immediately curl up against her and draw up the blanket.
> Four legs and a wing work their way around her, pulling the mare in against your belly.
"There. A little warmer now?"
> Giggling softly, Vapor rolls her head back to let her nose brush your chin.
> "Just like you, Thunderlane. Always looking out for another."
"Says the pony who's kept me going when I was ready to give up and fall."
> "Yes. We all need someone there for us."
"But I think you go above and beyond any real-"
> You would say something more, but there's something pressed against your lips.
> Vapor Trail.
> Her head turned just enough to let her lips touch yours.
"Mmmm-"
> Relaxing against her, you hold the moment until your lungs burn and heart is pounding.
> Although there might be other reasons for that thunder in your chest.
> Smiling, Vapor tucks her head back in against your neck and closes her eyes.
> "There."
"What - was that for?"
> "Because you consistently undervalue yourself and the effort you put in to all of this. You weigh yourself down with everypony else's struggles, never letting anyone else show how much they care about you unless they push the issue. And because-"
> She hesitates, stirring nervously.
> Brushing a hoof down her neck, you whisper softly:
"Vapor?"
> "-because I do care. About you, I mean."
"Well-."
> Turning Vapor's head, you bring your lips so close to hers that you can feel her puffing breath and whisper:
"I'd should probably get better at showing that, shouldn't I?"
> What follows is... very nice indeed.
>>
>>30902135

> How long had it been since you'd kissed a mare?
> Really had a relationship?
> After that initial hesitancy, everything begins to come so much more naturally.
> The touch of her lips to yours.
> Limbs meshed together.
> Several minutes later found you rolled on your back, Vapor clambered partially atop you and resting her head on your ribs.
"Vapor? Thank you."
> "For what? Kissing you?"
"For being blunt enough when a thickheaded stallion like me needs someone to show them just how much they're cared about."
> "Well then let me say-"
> Clambering a little further up, Vapor plants another firm and lasting kiss directly on your lips.
> "-you're welcome."
> You smile - and a moment later realize that when she had climbed up she had also thrown one hindleg over one of yours.
> Now your stifle was rubbing somewhere a little... intimate.
> Cheeks going bright red, you look away.
"Vapor?"
> "Yeeesss?"
> She knows.
> Swallowing hard, you turn back to look her straight in the eye:
"Are you sure you want this? You don't have to feel... obligated to me or anything because I'm looking after you-"
> "Thunderlane, do you really think I'd do this for a second if I didn't want to?"
> Expression turning sober, Vapor Trail shakes her head:
> "No. I know what I'm offering. And if you don't want to now.. I'll understand. But-"
> She taps your nose lightly with a sly grin returning to her face.
> "-you're going to have to choose fast, before this foal makes me all swollen up and gross."

So, what do we do at this point? Are we ready to go ahead with this relationship and accept Vapor Trail's offer to sleep with her? Or is this too much, too fast - especially for a pony dealing with a foal already on the way? Is it even right to sleep with a pregnant pony?!
>>
>>30902144
>Boner the Poner?
It would seem inevitable. The little head knows what it wants, and the big head can't see any pressing reason not to. Why fight destiny?
>>
>>30902144
Vapor seems to be in a stable state of mind. She's tender, supportive, and kind to him, and she has demonstrated over and over again that she cares deeply for him. I feel like saying no just doesn't make sense.

I say let them share the most intimate moment they can. They deserve it.
>>
>>30902144
This is probably going to really bite him in the ass later. Hes too protective of folk he really cares about and she will try to beak the law sooner or later. He's already hiding one thing for her.

On the otherhand he must be wound tighter than Celestia's thousand-thousand year old vagina and could use the stress relief. I'm kind of on the fence about this one.
>>
>>30902144
Yes, yes, all of the yes. Poor Thundy needs some good ol' fashioned pelvic exercise to take his mind off things. And maybe a mare without a pair of rose-colored glasses permanently glued to her muzzle can help rein him in when his Stockholm Syndrome flares up.
>>
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>>30902144
Sometimes it is okay to think with dong

Go for it. Pound up that pretty pregger pony pussy
>>
>>30902520
>his Stockholm syndrome
His?

He doesn't really sympathize with Anon, I dont think that definition really fits. Thunderlane just made a calculated choice to betray everyone else to protect his family.

If anything, Vapor's the one with Stockholm Syndrome. She's the one who started sympathizing with a guard helping hold her captive.
>>
>>30902144
Vapor Trail is a doble agent True?
>>
>>30902698
Maybe calling it 'Stockholm Syndrome' is a little strong, but Thunderlane has become increasingly deluded. Would a rational person honestly think that slavery somehow becomes 'better' because the man who thinks of you as his property whips you a little bit less and lets you pin up a few photos?
>>
>>30901124
I managed to pass entry exams since previous update and I feel i'll have a PhD by the end of the story. But it was worth waiting /)^3^(\
>>
>>30902144
Are we gonna get cucked raising her previous boyfriend's foal?
>>
>>30902850
So you think a slave owner who treats his property with a bit of dignity is literally no better than one who whips, abuses, and makes their life an even harsher living hell? There's no distinction at all to you?
>>
>>30903060
>literally no better
No, not any better: actually worse in the long term.

"The worst slave-owners were those who were kind to their slaves, and so prevented the horror of the system being realised by those who suffered from it, and understood by those who contemplated it" - Oscar Wilde

Bon Bon is afraid of Anon because he DOES treat his property with a bit of dignity. He makes the idea of her being his property seem normal, something she and her descendants can learn to live with, not something that must be fought to her last breath. This is his evil genius: he's just so reasonable about it!
>>
>>30899128
Your grammar is shit
>>
>>30903182
Welcome to the thread. ZZZZZ has always used machine translation.
>>
>>30903187
Been here since the beginning. I dont recognize him. I probably usually ignore him
>>
>>30903201
He literally comments on every update of almost every story, he's sort of a staple of the thread. Not sure how you can miss that.
>>
>>30903120
>this thing is true because its a quote from some guy a hundred years ago

Yeah, no. You post that Oscar Wilde quote every time this argument comes up, and it's still retarded. That's a load of bullshit to believe that causing more suffering is considered better than treating them with some dignity and respect. If you were forced into a life of slavery and you wanted to go with the owner who would work you and beat you to within an inch of your life as opposed to the one who might actually treat you with dignity, then you're either insane or a moron.
>>
>>30903263
>You post that Oscar Wilde quote
I've posted it before, but I'm not the only one; it's a common enough idea. If I were just worried about myself I might prefer to be someones pampered pet than face a short life of hard labor under the lash. If I had never known freedom I might think Anons deal was a pretty sweet one. Bon Bon (and Cadance) are thinking more 'big picture', a political activist who refuses to accept this as normal or justified.
Anon is good to his ponies, but he's doing something terrible to the species.
>>
>>30903263
Not that anon, but that phrase is still true if you think of it as cost efficiency and speed of doing their tasks. Anon is a good ol' slaver, y'know, that's his goal - to make them work as effective as he can. Maybe Oscar was a bit of a dick himself.
>>
>>30903263
This. No one is ever going to refute that war and slavery are ugly businesses, but spitting on someone who gives you a bit of water when you're dying in a desert is never a valid solution. Ponies that want Anon's head on a pike just want some two legged beast to blame at this point. For the fact that thier leaders failed them and fought were they couldn't win. I doubt society as a whole would condone slavery unless the ponies committed some horrors themselves. I'm not blaming them either though, again, war and slavery are always going to be an ugly thing and no one really ever wins.
>>
>>30902144
>preggo fugs

yus yus
>>
I'm thinking about writing a story for you guys though I haven't decided on a pony to feature. I'd rather not spoil it just yet but I'd like something about magic.

A unicorn would be choice but writing about an earth pony's innate magic is also acceptable. Any suggestions? We can go with either extremes so a powerful unicorn/earthpone or a relatively weak one would be acceptable.
>>
>>30903506
Mayor Mare is for snuggles
>>
>>30903529
Excellent choice, I'll go with that. I'm a slow writer so I'll be back in a few threads.
>>
I want to tie down a slave pone in front of a bunch of griffons.
I want them to go after his belly with their sharp raking claws to dig in and pull them through his fur.
To grab his lims, to pull them out and bend them out of place.
I want them to drive their beaks in his face, to make him scream as he is stuck there.
Then I want the now cleaned little stallion to accept his great chocolate chip coated kiss.
>>
>>30903182
>>30903187

Use Google translations, maybe for that my gramatic is "shit"
>>
>>30904120
What is your native language?
>>
>>30904136
Good morning, I'm Spanish speaker, I enjoy participating in this thread for the quality of the stories, creative participation of the authors and the feedback from us; the 'public' observer
>>
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>>30902144
>>
>>30904365
Man, I miss Cobalt Snow's pony stuff. Shame he bailed and went full furry.
>>
>>30902144
>Waifubait evolves into Waifu
Yes please.

She's sincere about their sorta-relationship turning into something more serious, and Thunderlane has feelings for her too. As much as I love over-analyzing everything about what it could result in, the decision has already been made. This relationship has already been building for months and they're already emotionally invested; adding in sex doesn't do anything to change how they feel about each other. They'll be just as close after this, and any potential troubles down the road will be just as devastating. I think it would be good for both of them, even if it doesn't really change their relationship much.

If anything, I'm a little worried about the foal. Pregnant sex is safe as long as you're not rough about it, but if she's too far along it could kickstart the birth.

>She taps your nose lightly with a sly grin
Thunderlane just got booped

>>30902349
>On the otherhand he must be wound tighter than Celestia's thousand-thousand year old vagina
The change in hormones during pregnancy means Vapor probably needs this more than he does.

>>30902815
At this point I don't think so. It sounded like she was a messenger for Sunburst's escape plan, and we're already a part of that.
>>
>>30894024
>>30894037
Still would vastly prefer sunset shimmer going full human and taking ownership of twilight sparkle, breaking her into an obedient pony to her new master.
>>
>>30894052
>muh she predicted twilight would save their asses forever after every bad thing happened
you're fucking retarded
>>
>>30902144
>sex

Absolutely. Just be gentle since she's pregnant, but sex shouldn't do anything to harm the baby. Gosh, I'm so happy for both of them!
>>
>>30904454
kek. still being upset about people not liking your favorite character.
>>
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>>30902144


Well.....

>Periscope Up!
>Target in sigth!
>Ready the torpedoes!
>FIRE!!!!

Lets go Thunder! It's time for you to be happy!
>>
>>30904768
Yes, onward to victory!
>>
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>>30902144
>>
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The ponies are not to spank!

Unless this is her fetish
>>
>>30906110
Unless they are Rarity. Rarity is for spanking.
>>
>>30906110
Looks like he's smacking her right in the pussy with the paddle.
>>
>>30906542
That's the point
>>
Spank Rares
>>
I want more cyborg slaves that are desperate to find a way around their corporate firewalls for a chance at getting out onto the free internet.
Their lives ruled by DRMed augments they try to jailbreak to be able to boop and hug as they please.
Anon as a phreaker giving them a few minutes to just be ponies again before having to hop nodes and escape corpsec.
>>
>>30906743
That's pretty hot.
>you will never pussy torture mare
>>
>>30907696
>>30906276
alright.
>>
>>30909102
>"Alright, wasn't going to but if you insist..."
As if you need to be asked! Perhaps this Rarity could be another prequel to Staying Out Of Trouble? This might be her very first owner, before she goes to the breeding facility or the sweat shop. This might be where she first forms her opinions about human males, where her generosity starts to be corrupted. Would be nice to tie everything together instead of completely separate stories.
>>
Here goes nothing.


>Be Anon, out of one of your many walks on the crumbling sidewalks of downtown.
>You’re heading downtown to pick up an ounce of motivation on demand, an addiction that fuels your life. For better or worse.
>Rats jump from trashcan to bush and back again. The pristine night’s silence is only interrupted by the cadence of cicadas, far off shots of violence, and oddly enough a sound you haven't heard around these parts. Sounds like a pair of klogs being thrown down a wooden staircase. It’s only 50 meters behind you. The new sound in such close proximity has you on edge. You finger your pocket checking your magnum. Pulling the hammer halfway back before releasing it. Picking the paint off the old steel. Nervous habits.
>Best to ignore it, many creatures in bad neighborhoods only attack when acknowledged. They are coyotes, hunt in packs, don't look at them. If you do look at them, make them think you are on of them. Scratch your arms, limp, look all around.
>as you look all around you notice your fellow coyotes, across the street, howling at you.
>”Yo, white boy, you got a friend.”
>They point behind you.
>You push one hand in your pocket and pull a 360.
>10 meters behind you, a grey pony with a knife in it’s mouth.
>It posses, Fight or flight has kicked in. Amatuer, the best option is always fight.
>You rush it.
“You mugged the wrong crack head tonight fucker.”
>It bolts down an alley, you follow. Pulling your magnum as you approach, you slap it with the butt of the gun.
>A sickening crack comes, it tumbles through the dirt, dropping the knife as it lets out a scream.
>A lion paces around it’s prey when its down, you are no lion though, you place a boot on it’s back. Pinning it to the ground.
>>
>>30909345
“Care to explain why you were coming at me with a knife?”
>The pony, she, grey coat,black mane. Starts to sob and beg for it’s life.
>Regrets flood you. This isn’t a hardened criminal like the people here. Just a pony, probably a runaway, forced to hide in the areas where the cops don't come. Screw your bleeding heart, you ain't a fucking liberal, but seeing something in pain for factors out of it’s control hurts you inside.
>You pull your foot off it.
“Don’t run.”
>It nods.
“You a run away?”
>nods again
“Turned to mugging people in bad neighborhoods for money?”
>Nods again.
Chuckle inducing. “You know, you’re lucky. You tried to mug the only human in this neighborhood. Most people here would of raped and killed you. You’re just lucky I’ve seen people like you before. Really fucked up my plans tonight though, but I think I got better ones now.”
>She has stopped crying and is now just still as death. You stand back a few feet and tell it to follow. She tries to stand, only for her back leg to collapse dominoing her body back to the ground.
>Fuck, that’s the leg you hit her on, guess you broke it.
“Shit, cmon, lets go get you fixed up. Promise not to bite me?”
>She nods, you pick her up and carry her back to your place. The coyotes from before have turned into hyenas as they see you walk out with the pony.
>Having her in your arms you can feel her fragility. It’s like holding a sack of glass. You fear for her health.


Really only 2 posts? well I got a few more pages to edit.
>>
>>30909287
I could do that at one point. For now i'll just add more to 'homewrecker'. But you're right this was my plan all along.

paste for folks to missed it: https://pastebin.com/4WLWT4eU
>>
>>30909349
>You arrive back at your place. You transfer her to the coach and grab your medkit.
>You return and feel around her legs.
>Gnats jump from her fur onto your hands. Prompting you to put on gloves.
>As you feel around you quickly are able to find her bone. Doing your best as a very amatuer horse vetranarian. With only a google search and emergency response first aid training you are able to determine it isn’t broke.
“Does it hurt?”
>She nods.
“Can you talk?”
>She opens her mouth, with a slight eastern european accent she speaks “Most master prefer us to be quite, master.”
>Her calling you master almost instantly ignites your groin into a half chub. Fuck, shit, damnit.
>You’re a good person, but only as good as a 4channer can be. You have your fetishes, BDSM and slaves happens to be one of them. Ever since actual slavery became legal the BDSM clubs have been both drying up and under attack. You have no where to get it out in a healthy way, so you’re pretty pent up, and with a slave being dropped in your lap, you are facing a moral dilemma. Id says make her yours and abuse her, super ego says treat her right and protect the smile, ego,well ego doesn't want either.
“Haha, yeah… well I’m fine with a talkative …. Companion. So don’t be afraid to speak your mind.”
>She nods. So much for talkative you guess. Her stomach growls at you. At which point you walk to the kitchen and grab some water, a straw, and a few oranges.
>Bringing it back, her eyes brighten when she sees it.
>You sit in front of her on the couch. You hold the water in front of her, while she greedily sips it through the straw.
>you peel the orange for her and begin feeding her slices. This continues for awhile. Her eating out of your hand.
>>
>>30909372
>“Thank you for the meal master.”
>You smile and pet her mane. Again gnats jump from her to your hand, fat buggers as well. Even through your glove you can feel them slamming against your hand.
“Bath time.”
>you pick her up and carry her to your tub.
>Checking the water and grabbing anti-tick cream, along with other bath essentials you then place her in the water.
>She lets out a hum as the warm water washes over her, sweeping away the dirt from her fur. Carrying with it ticks and maggot larva.
>Even as a hardened man you still shudder. Maggots are linked to bad memories for you, dead bodies full of them, lining the streets when your platoon drove through some towns. Having to sort them would of been manageable if it wasn't for them. You had gas masks for the smell, but the maggots. Thousands of them, you’d grab a body and try to wipe them off enough to see what uniform they had on. They’d stick onto you, wiggling into your gloves and up your sleeves.
>You shudder. The pony notices this, along with your pause of remembrance.
>”I’m sorry I’m so disgusting new master.”
“No, not your fault. I just hate maggots.”
>”They gathered in the cuts on me.”
>Fuck, open wounds you need to treat. This is going to take awhile.
>>
>>30909377
>After a few hours, three bathtubs full of dirty water, and a medkit and half of bandages. You have gotten this pony clean and treated.
>The drain of your shower is full of bugs. You grab some darin clearer, pouring it down the bodies of the vile creatures begin to melt, hopefully it will do its job by morning and they’ll all be gone. You take the pony to your room and lay her on the bed.
>It’s late on a friday night, your eyelids are anvils, and your body is exhausted, but you want to find out more about this pony. You grab a small bag from your dresser, cutting the powder up you do a medium line to keep you going.
>”What’s that master?”
“Medicine, I have a bad heart, but never mind that, what's your name?”
>”Each master names me as they wish.”
“No, your original name, you're too old to be born from the slave mills, you’re obviously kidnapped from your home and sold into it. What was your name back in horseland?”
>”I can’t say.”
“Bullshit, why not?”
>”I’m afraid.”
“Of?”
>”Humans will pervert it. I can be a slave by other names, but I want to keep my original linked to happy times.” She looks away and stares out the window. “If that’s okay with you, master.”
“Yeah, I understand that, guess it’s on me to name you. Warning though. I am not creative.”
>you look at her butt mark, Like many ponies it’s supposed to be something about them. It's a musical note. Umm, what’s a musical term, harmony? Melody? Song?
>>
>>30909377
>You finger your pocket checking your magnum.
Magnums don't go in pockets, they're big chunks of machinery that live in dedicated holsters.
>gnats
You mean fleas? Horses have a diverse ecosystem of parasites, but they don't get fleas, or gnats. Maybe lice? This came up last thread too. But maggots: super gross, and very serious! Hope Anon knows what he's doing, she might die quite soon.

And good start overall, looking forward to moar!
>>
>>30909467
“Uhhhh, I’ll call you Melody I guess, cause music or whatever, and that sounds like a decent name.”
>She eyes you suspiciously then nods.
“What don’t like it?”
>”it’s fine master.”

>You grab your laptop then lay down. Booting it up. You begin to browse 4chan.
>You feel a tug at your pants. Lifting your laptop your see Melody tugging your zipper with her mouth.
“Whatcha doing?”
>”About to pleasure you master.”
>Your member gets hard, rising in your pants. Curse your damn fetishes, you don't want to fuck her right now. You just met her. She stares at the bulge.
“No thanks. I just…” did you rescue or kidnap her? “Rescue/kidnapped you. Haven't decided what I want you to be yet.”
>”I can see you want it master, I can use my pussy if you don't trust me not to bite.”
“Jesus, how broken are you?” You set the laptop on your night stand. “Come here.” you pat up next to your side.
>she crawls up close to you, you run a hand over her back, enjoying her clean soft fur.
“I’m complicated and fucked up. I’m a bad good person. I don’t know if I should give you a good sex free home, where you are an equal, or abuse and use you. I will hate myself no matter what I do. You understand?”
>”It’s hard to get by in this world. You don't seem so bad yet though.”
“You’re a smart pony, cmere.”
>You pull her close and spoon her, rubbing her soft belly and running fingers through her now silky hair.
>she hums as your rubs turn to scritches
>”This is nice master.” You pull her closer and move your scritches to her ear.
>After a while you grab your laptop, putting it in front of both of your faces, you continue to browse 4chan, reading random threads. Using your new pony as a cuddle buddy instead of a sex slave seems weird, but she seems to be content.
>Until she begins to grind a bit on you. It feels nice, so you don't stop her.
>>
>>30909485
>As you keep browsing she keeps working you up, you feel a drop of wetness begin to soak into your clothes from her warm unders.
“What is it Melody?”
>”I want to repay you, master.”
“For?”
>”Taking me in, I can tell you’re going to be my best master yet, I want to make sure you want to keep me around. I can feel you’re hard. I know you’re pent up. Use me master. Make me officially your cumdump. I want it master.”
>towelonforehead.jpeg
“Who talk you to dirty talk like that, so self deprecating as well. You know my type.”
>As much as you want to fuck her, you just got her. She’s trying to cement herself in your life. You should deny her, as to keep it in her mine, that she maybe unattractive, that she may be replaceable.
“So who was your last master? Any chance at a reward might be out for you?”

>>30909469
Imagine it's a snub then. Also horses dont get gnats or flies? Learn something new everyday
>>
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>>30909503
>pone is apprehensive and suspicious when called melody
>has music mark on ass
Well hello Octavia.

>magnum snub nose
Some people are just crazy. My 38 snubby is enough of a pain as it is when I fire defensive rounds, and dollars to donuts it gets the job done.
>>
>Year "105 B.NMM. Equestria"/"105 A.D. Earth"
>Portal opens in both planes and Rome rushes in to conquer
>Ponies completely dominate them but spare their lives for the good of both worlds
>Rome prospers like never before and expands like crazy over the globe
>Ponies dont know what s happening on the other side
>They still get pony modeled spears and Halberds for their guard as trade, so they re probably doing good

>Year "15 B.NMM. Equestria"/"195 A.D. Earth"
>Portal closes, nopony crossed to the human side, but human traders did and got stuck when it happened
>Said humans are welcomed in pony cities and their experience in trading and crafting passed to ponies as result
>Carriages, markets and the Equestrian bit are officialized
>Celestia also made a hex spell on the portal area so if it ever opened again she d know immediatelly
>Ponies often write about the good in humans, and the silly need of show of power charade for them to respect to their race
>Most if not all of these books are lost in the rise of Nightmare Moon
>Meanwhile Rome, illiterate as it was, wrote nothing about the ponies help
>And those who were literate decided to hide the fact and just praise Rome for its success
>Rome grows a bit more, but quickly crumbles withouth the ponies assistance

>Year "1005 A.NMM. Equestria"/"2010 A.D. Earth"
>Portal opens back up, Celestia gets giddy to meet back old friends
>Being the only one that knows about the legend besides Luna she gathers a platoon for the power charade
>Not that they ll be needed with her magic
>But humans loved platoons
>So she took a dozen ponies along to the ride
>Yea it wasnt that big, but it would do
>Meanwhile scientists on Earth are panicking about the energy disruption force that just opened
>Some argue that its a just non-temporal energy reflux, others believe its a black hole and that they need to shut it down
>The whole country is evacuated and satellites keep 24/7 watch
>>
>>30909986
>When a white horse with wings and a huge horn comes out they re quick to lauch a nuke at the "invaders"
>Celestia in other hoof cant recognize the place, now full of tall buildings and flat rock roads
>The platoon is speechless and gawking at everything in sight
>Seeing no one around she almost takes to the skies
>But then she sees a dot moving her way and grabs it in her telekinesis to examine better
>Detecting an anomaly the nuke detonated kilometres away and above
>The heat wave can still be felt by all present horses, the mushroom cloud being a testimony of its power
>Celestia orders a retreat, apparently the humans improved considerably
>She will need to get all 4 princess for this charade it seems
>They are just so silly
>Meanwhile all humans are panicking
>It was streamed all over the world by the satellites
>What just happened simply could not be possible
>Fearing the worst, all countries come as one and raise a red flag against the portal
>All armed forces, combat units, missiles and military relocated to the location
>They will fight the invaders or they will die trying
>(both)This time they will be ready for them...
>>
>>30909992
Oh btw this is it, just wanted to make a prelude green about this thread
The humans won, invaded equestria, yadda yadda

Also i think its better to leave what happened to the pricessess open as well, they fled? They got captured? They died? All three? Who knows....
>>
>>30909503
Octavia is one of the most designs of ponies, elegant, beatiful and really really almost look how a human girl, is a good begin Munster
>>
>>30909992
Yes, the first thing we do is immediately launch a nuke. On a hair-trigger.

Not snipe them, or observe them for a few minutes.

Edge for the sake of edge.
>>
>>30904527
I love twilight and celestia you dumbass, which is exactly why I don't consider them vapid enough of a character to think they planned getting their ass kicked every single time they fuck up in order to powerlevel their purplesmart
>>
>>30910334
I like them too, but wow why are you still so worried about this?
>>
>>30910325
>Edge for the sake of edge
Nah, my reasoning for it was that, like i said, everything was already evacuated, therefore there wouldnt be anyone close to snipe.
And they already were observing it thru the satellites until a living being came out of it. Didnt wanted to drag it out, but I dont think commanders and generals would take the chance if another species could apparently simply open a portal in our world to do whatever
>>
>>30907759
I admit the idea of ponies being kind of like unwilling PET's like battlenetwork is pretty swag, being an immortal but static magic pony program that had cybergaurd injected to make her UI and subroutines pliable to her human owner, going on internet adventures together while adjusting to being property. human shape optional
>>
>>30908542
> torture
Noone forces you to hit her full force, just gentle pats
>>
>>30910410
thats pretty gay
>>
>>30910474
It's not like you're tapping her dick. It just does not have to be till bruises, it's just with every hit she is becoming less sensitive so you have to start with small to tease her longer. Some time later they will have to be harder hits of course, but still calculated.
>>
>>30861614

> ~~~~

> I almost couldn't wrap my head around what Lavender had done. After quickly checking over Smokey - or rather, Opal Gleam, which was his real name - and making sure he wasn't badly hurt, I just sat back and tried to understand.
> It could have been much worse. The stallion wasn't injured, aside from a few bruises and welts. And he was clinging to me as if his life depended on it, bawling his eyes out. I guessed he wasn't crying so much from pain as from the shock.
> I gently patted his head and tried to calm him down.
"It's okay, buddy. You're fine."
> It wasn't much, but it seemed to help. Opal gradually calmed.
> "Why?" he asked tearfully. He pulled his face out of my wet and sticky shirt to look up at me.
> "Why would Lavender do this? What happened to her?"
"You did, I think."
> His breath caught and his ears went back. He was about to resume his waterworks, so I plunged on.
"Tell me how you two broke up. I heard her side of the story, but I want yours, too."
> For a moment it seemed I had pushed him too far, but the pony composed himself. It was a visible struggle and he had to close his eyes and take several calming breaths.
> "I- I- just couldn't take it anymore," he explained eventually, refusing to look at me. "She was always angry. Unreasonable!"
"In what way?"
> Even with his face plastered with tears and clinging to his slaver, the stallion somehow managed to draw himself up regally.
>>
>>30910810

> "She demanded that I wash dishes!" he explained with a horrified expression. "And sweep! And cook!"
> It was a struggle to keep my face neutral. I almost burst out laughing. The little guy really was a noble, his words proved it.
> "Me?! How could she ask that?!" he went on, indignantly. "That is work for the help. I knew we couldn't afford it, so it should have been *her* job until we could!"
"And you were out working?"
> Even the word seemed to fill him with disgust. But he wasn't completely stupid. He realized how he sounded. "I was... looking for connections."
> I made an educated guess.
"Going out to bars with your old drinking buddies?"
> His deadpan stare made the room feel a little colder.
> "Looking for connections," he repeated firmly.
"Yeah, I can see why she flipped out."
> "What do you mean?" he asked, suspiciously.
"There's just one thing left. What did she see in you in the first place? Smart mare like Lavender and a spoiled rich kid like you? I don't think she fell for money."
> His jaw dropped. Obviously, Opal had assumed I would take his side. He scrambled to get out of my lap, disgust plain on his face. "I- you're- it didn't-" he spluttered, then he settled on his best comeback: "Shut up!"
> There were already fresh tears in his eyes.
"A few phrases, I'm guessing. Something you didn't even come up with yourself, probably. And your father's money helped, I think."
>>
>>30910815

> His expression told me that I had hit the mark.
"And that's why you're all 'sad' and 'miserable' now. The humans are trying to make you work. I gotta give you credit, though. You made Sasha believe you'd broken. That must have taken some acting."
> I had lost him. The pony refused to admit it, but he was confused. "Lies! All you humans do is lie!" he countered, falling back on one of the few 'facts' he was certain of.
> I quickly pieced together the story, while Opal watched with wide, horrified eyes.
"Tell me if I'm right: Your owner - young girl, impressionable, gullible. You're taking her for a ride and she believes every word about how miserable you are. You're refusing to eat, but she sneaks you a few bites every now and then, enough to keep you going, but make it look like you're wasting away."
> He almost choked on his tongue.
"Are you really willing to starve, just to get out of some housework? You're making a child lie to her parents because you're what- too fine to cook or clean up once in a while?"
> "You- you bastard!" he hissed at me, choosing for the strongest word he knew.
> Before the pony could react, my hand shot out and caught him by the ear. I drew him closer while he screamed in terror. I examined his mane.
"Yeah, this 'dirty, neglected, starved' shtick won't fly with me. Do you rub dirt in your coat on your own, or does the kid help you?"
>>
>>30910824

> As soon as I released him, Opal ran to the opposite wall. It was getting dark and all I could see was his white horn, mane and eyes, staring at me balefully.
"Any of that sound familiar, *Opal*?"
> He refused to answer, even to defend himself. But he began sobbing, this time in true fear.
"Here's what we'll do. I'll teach you how to do all those chores you've been avoiding."
> The unicorn flinched and gasped, as if I had struck him.
"Don't worry, we'll go slow so you can learn. We'll also fatten you up some. You'll eat what your owners give you and you'll say 'please' and 'thank you', okay?"
> "I would die first!"
"No, I don't think you would. You're a coward."
> His voice shook badly. "I- I won- won't obey!"
"Maybe, but I'll let Lavender have some quality time with you every day until you do. And I'll give her a real whip, not that clumsy leash she used today."
> The threat hit home. I could see the pony touch a welt on his back with his muzzle. I even saw his eyes narrow in a wince.
"In fact- she will be in charge of you. You're to obey her just like you'd obey me, got that?"
> The certainty in my voice helped. I had some experience with pony nobility. It wasn't too hard to break them, once you got past the clout and hauteur.
> This particular pony, if handled properly, could bring Lavender and me closer together.
>>
>>30910833

> Opal was already sniffling, the only thing keeping him from tears was his pride. He didn't want me to see him weeping, not anymore, after everything I had told him.
> "Leave me alone!" he whimpered. There wasn't even anger behind the words anymore, just sorrow and fear. "Why don't you all just go to Tartarus and leave me alone!"
"Sure. No problem. But while I'm gone, you'll make Lavender's bed and tidy up the room. She will expect it spotless by the time she is back."
> I got up and approached him. The pony shrank back, pressing himself against the wall in fear. But I just gathered up the mattress on the floor and hoisted it up on my shoulder.
> "W-what are you doing with that?" he asked, fearfully.
"You won't be sleeping here. I'll set up your bed in the supplies closet for now."
> It was the final blow and Opal couldn't contain himself any longer. He began weeping and the shame of me seeing it just made it worse. He hid his head under the bed and wrapped his hooves around his muzzle for good measure.
> I left him to it.
> ...
> I found Lavender in the greenhouse, busily fiddling with a few of her plants. Many of the pots were on the floor and she was staring intently at one, brushing the leaves this way and that with her magic.
> She noticed me come in, but didn't look. "I- I'm sorry," she said, unwilling to turn and meet my gaze.
"Don't be. You were right. That guy is a hypocrite."
>>
>>30910841

> That made her whirl around and stare. The pot in her magical grasp wobbled and almost fell, before she caught it again.
> "I *whipped* him, Anon! He'll never trust us to help him now!"
> I shook my head and grinned.
"Nah, he didn't trust us to begin with. He was playing his owners for fools and wanted to do the same with us."
> The mare cocked her head to the side and narrowed her eyes in suspicion. "What are you saying?"
"It's an act, Lavender. He's making himself look all miserable and depressed to get out of work. I believe you had similar problems with him back when you lived together?"
> Before she could stop it, the pony nodded. It made her blush a little in embarassment, so she quickly tried to cover it up.
> "I saw him! He's thin and dirty and ragged! They really are abusing him!"
> I shook my head again.
"He gets bathed every day or two. Did you look at his mane closely? Well washed, with just enough dirt rubbed in to make it look bad."
> She was stunned. "What?!" It took the unicorn a few moments to gather her wits again. "Well, he *is* starved! Or did he fake his ribs showing?"
"No, that one is real. He has to refuse food from his owners to keep up his charade, but the little girl sneaks him something to eat when she can at night."
> The next part was pure guesswork, but I was fairly certain it was right on the money.
"He probably nags her and complains, but she can't get him any more without her parents noticing. Lavender - he's bullying a child."
>>
>>30910846

> She believed me and her face darkened. I saw the flower pot she was still holding wobble again. "That sneaky, miserable.. cur!" she spat. "Manipulative bastard!"
"So you see, whipping him wasn't so bad. He had it coming, especially after trying to butter you up as well. I guess he was hoping you'd indulge him just like that little girl."
> The mare snorted and pawed the ground with her hoof. I saw her nostrils flare as she took deep, angry breaths.
> I put my hand in her mane and stroked her neck calmingly.
"Relax. I know how to handle this. We can fix it."
> It worked beyond my wildest dreams. She lowered the pot and stared into my eyes with complete faith. "How?" she asked, her voice full of determination and cold fury.
"We teach him."
> There was a slight look of alarm in her eyes, so I quickly raised my hands and gave her my best, friendliest smile.
"Nothing like my old methods, don't worry. In fact, *you'll* be in charge of his punishments, okay? I won't lift a finger to touch him. That way, you have complete control over it."
> The pony slowly relaxed. "Okay," she said. The way she hung her head down told me she didn't like the idea very much, but she also couldn't find an alternative.
"You'll teach him to do housework and behave nicely, nothing more. We don't want to break him, like I used to do, and we're not in a hurry - they paid half in advance so we can take a couple of months if we manage our expenses."
>>
>>30910849

> Hearing the full extent of her duties made Lavender pause. She looked up, uncertain. "Anon, I don't think I can-"
> I interrupted her before she could talk herself out of it.
"Nonsense! You'll do great. Remember, the goal is to get him comfortable in his role. We want him happy just as much as his adoptive family. They're nice folk, I already told you that. If you want, we can meet them."
> It took a while, but she slowly nodded. "I do. I want to meet them. I have to make sure!"
"Okay, but promise me you'll behave. We have to show these people how nice a pony can be. Just think of Pearl and Linda. That's what we want for Opal and his owners, okay?"
> This time her nod was more certain. The mare even smiled a little at the memory.
> "Yeah," she said. "Celestia knows he doesn't deserve that, but it's the right thing to do."
> I held my arms open and she gratefully walked into them for a hug.
"Look, I've been thinking. You and I- we can do what I used to do. Only with you watching over me, we can do it *right*!"
> I felt her nod into my chest. "Yeah," she said in a voice muffled by fabric.
"But first thing - you have to get Opal Gleam cleaned up. Can you do that? Remember, you have your magic and he doesn't."
> She pulled away, thinking. Finally she bobbed her head up and down. There was fresh determination in her eyes.
> "Right," the pony agreed.
>>
>>30910855

"Good. I put his bed in the broom cupboard for now. I don't want him to bug you at night. I'll also give you a whip - you probably won't need it, but just keep it in sight. It should help him focus."
> I could see the distaste she felt at the mention of the implement, but her mouth pressed together in a thin line and she nodded again. "I understand."
"You'll have to discipline him, I think you've seen that already. Just don't be too hard on him, okay?"
> "Yeah, I- I'll be careful."
> The mare was thoughtful, but I thought she would do just fine. Her residual feelings, both of care and anger, toward the stallion would help Lavender find her role.
> But it was time to stop her thinking about it.
"Oh, by the way: Pearl will have her birthday party next week. What do you say we go out tomorrow and find a nice present for her? We can't go too expensive, but we should get something at least."
> She immediately brightened up. I started walking back to the house and the pony followed right on my heels. She was full of ideas for a nice, cheap present and I made sure to listen, even as my heart raced.
> Everything went better than expected. And seeing Lavender like this - happy, engaged in pleasant conversation with her 'owner' - would drive the point home for Opal Gleam.
> There would be no help from his wife. The despair should make him more amenable to his training.
>>
>>30910862

> Between the two of us, I believed we could straighten the stallion out in less than the four months I had agreed.
> And then - who knows? Perhaps, if I picked the cases carefully and took only the ones where I could genuinely help, Lavender would agree to work with me?
> The possibilities made me smile.

There we go. I got a new job and while it's great, it also leaves me quite tired for these first few weeks, at least. My frequency of updating will slow down a little as a result, sorry.

But I have looked in every now and then and there are some quality greens going on right now, so y'all should be okay.

Hope you also like this latest one of mine! All "backlash" is very appreciated.
>>
>>30910876
it is time
>>
>>30910876
That twist was beautifully done, lavender becoming the monster she so desperately hated
>>
>>30910876
Yea, this is exactly the direction the story should go!

>"No, I don't think you would. You're a coward."
>dispair should make him amenable
Anon sees Smoky as an easy case, and he's the expert. It will be fun watching him and Lavender become an effective team, with her being the whip-wielding taskmaster and him being the friendly human trainees come to for advice and respite.
This visit to Smokys owners will be the turning point for Lavender: will she be able to swallow her pony pride and play the slave in public for him, or not?
>>
>>30910376
I was seeing it more as that they are "free" ponies who were taken care of at the mercy and care of a corporation.
That it makes them slaves isn't an issue, just natural to how things are.
>>
>>30910876
Give Lavender some treats so she can reward him for good behaviour.
>>
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Quick update for those following my story. Gonna be another day delayed due to a busier than expected week. Sorry. Trying to get at least one update out per week for you guys, but things don't always seem to go as planned.

Part 4 should be posted around this time tomorrow, if not earlier. Please look forward to it.
>>
>>30910876
Ooooh, boy. Pearl, you've got some lessons to learn!

> All "backlash" is very appreciated.
Backlash? This is the single best twist you've put into this story yet. It helps Pearl understand not just how easy it is to flip out in a rage at someone and hurt them, but also comprehend how Anonymous wasn't just cruelly tormenting ponies but very often guiding them into a happy (if broken) acceptance of their new place in life. It's an extreme example, admittedly, but it works.

Whether or not Pearl comes to being more understanding or eventually cracks and breaks down on the realization she is becoming just the thing she hated so much, I look forward to the future of this story.

>>30890975
A little to much, to quickly - but that's simply the nature of short stories, and what you've got here is pure, high-grade feels. Cute little relationships with fillies are instant heart-bait, and this is no exception.
>That little boop
>Tickly kiss on the frog
> “It was so sweet, Master. Mommy tried to cover my eyes, but I saw it.”
Hnnng. That's the most adorable little thing.

>>30900257
>'Staying out of trouble' is on hiatus white i write 'the chase'
>'The Chase' is on haitus while I write 'Homewrecker'
>'Homewrecker is on haitus while I write...'
You know this is how it starts, man.
>>
>>30910876
Lavender should develop some magical herbal physic disables pony magic, like Anons drugs do. There might be practical benefits like wider dosage range or reduced (or different?) side effects, but the symbolism of using her special talent this way would help the story arc. You should end the story cleanly when Smoky goes back to his owners a perfect gently-broken slave. It's the natural place for it and this one deserves a place in the 'Compleated Stories' list. A sequel would always be welcome, of course.
>>
>>30910361
Your reasoning is bad.
I can't see Mattis advising a strike or ordering one on a force that he doesn't even know are hostile, let alone one that we don't even know can be affected by our weapons.

"Let's try and murder the possibly omnipotent beings, instead of you know, saying hi, what's up with this portal?"
>>
>>30912315
Not that Anon, but bad reasoning often makes good story. He seems to be angling for a specific setting for it to happen in, and making shit up to justify it. By those standards it all makes good sense. If everypony was always reasonable, we wouldn't have drama to write about!
>>
>>30909992
>>30909992
This reads like a 12-year-old trying to write a first contact but the only thing he's seen is Independence Day and My Little Pony.
>>
>>30912352
>Implying that any of that would be a bad thing
He does not have the practiced voice of a professional storyteller, but it could turn into some good green. Have some patience, or at least be constructive.
>>
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Mint horse is well-trained.
>>
>>30910361

> boring, overdone premise
> poor writing
> barely related to slave ponies

>>30912344
>>30912593
> ah, what a promising start!

I guess once you give up on quality control, every story must seem great.
>>
>>30911520
>putting metal in your slave waifu
>getting rid of bathable warm flesh
>letting Soros turn her into a spy machine
>>
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>>30909503
>Tavipet
Unf. I approve of this.

You're going pretty fast and pretty formulaic so far. Also be wary of over-edgy anons; he's already a toughguy who walks in the bad parts of town, a damaged ex-soldier, carries a gun and can take a fight, does drugs, etc...

But don't take this to mean your story is automatically and totally shit: You've also got a lot of promise here, and if anything I'm just trying to make the overall story better! The touch about her not wanting to give her real name because it gives her something to hold on to is a great one - a slave searching for the one single way she can still have power in her life. Similarly, that she doesn't seem utterly broken - after all, she does have a bit of fight left in her - so much as knows she doesn't have any other way to repay him. It'd actually be kind of interesting if her last master was good too, but just didn't have the means to care for her so she took to selling herself and muggings to support herself.

If you take the potentially negative aspects and turn them into something positive, this could go somewhere very nice.

>>30901094
Like this guy, for instance. I wasn't a fan of the misanthropic aspects of this story, but I am loving Lyra trying to snap Anon out of his self-induced pity party. The moment of trust between them as she washes him is a great one, as is her being willing to curl up next to him.

Damaged soldier or not, he attacked another armed person acting in a hostile manner. Not sure if this is madness or genius, but it's a nice counterpoint to all his "woe is my species" bullshit.
>TFW the still-enslaved pony is the least misanthropic character in the story
>>
Which pony needs spanks the most:

Rarity
Applejack
Rainbow Dash
Pinkie Pie
Fluttershy
Twilight Sparkle
>>
>>30913346
Twi at the bottom? Heresy. Proper list:

1.) Rarity/twilight
2.) Everyone else, who cares lol
>>
>>30913346
Probably Twilight but I'd rather see AJ just because she's the least likely to be featured and would probably react the most interestingly to being robbed of her power.
>>
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>>30913346
Rarity because she fucked up
Sponkle because she's into it.
Applerack because she thinks that's how folks reproduce. Because she overheard her parents but never saw it.
>>
>>30909503
I don't think that there were any story with Tavi in focus yet. Good start so far.
>>
>>30913484
There has been at least one other. It was also based in a German occupied France in ww2
>>
>You walked over to the unicorn, business was good.
>”What are your interests?”
“Whatever you need madame, I exist to serve.”
>You looked over at Fleur, a bit confused.
>”No personality?”
“He’s new, but old. I think he may have been on magic suppressants to long. That, and he’s very, very gay.”
>Well that would be mean to take advantage of, you waved him off to go back and be with the other stallions again.
>You walked over to the Pegasus, your slave was hiding behind you from him, and you took a sudden side step while pushing her forward with a bit of magic.
>The eep and stammering mess from her was just adorable.
>Even more so when he gave her a little nuzzle with his chin.
>You leaned down and checked between his legs.
>Yeah, that would do for fun.
>You turned to Fleur, and dismissed the earth pony.
>He kept, glaring at you, as though you had done something wrong.
>”What’s his problem?”
“Oh Rotten Rivers? He’s just naturally cranky due to a bum leg. A giant scar, he refuses to say how he got it, but whatever it was, he is lucky to be alive.”
>You shudder, an awareness of just how it could have happened hitting hard.
“You okay there Lyra? You look like you saw a wendigo.”
>”Yeah if only.” You remark, a hoof playing with the stud in your ear.
>>
>>30913682
/////
>The Pegasus’s name was Rubble Rescue.
>As Celestia would have willed it, he had been a professional archeologist in Equestria working for a private gallery before the humans had captured him.
>Thoughts buzzed in your head, you could find out so much from him, what to look for that was the most valuable, how to find the lost treasures, even just if you had the right tools.
>You managed to talk Fleur into a long rental with him and to take him home.
>Well more she had made you take him home, saying that you needed a stallion in you for the sake of your life.
>Not at all subtle she was anymore.
>The hot dog and sauce was definitely overdoing it when she broke for a “snack”.
>Your questions for him would have to wait though, right now you needed to get on with the business.
>You tugged your slave and rental into the room, the batpony having been tied behind the pegasus to make sure he didn’t try and escape.
>That you had chosen to repeatedly break check the little group and have them bump into each other had been completely due to the fact you weren’t used to walking two slaves at once.
>You’d have to get another one for, practice, if this worked out.
>Your bed was a frumpled mess from the morning, it didn’t matter though as you whisked off the sheets and threw them to the side with a sweep of magic.
>You climbed onto it and turned around, facing the door and the mirror on it.
>You flicked your tail as you went, caressing Rescue’s chin playfully.
>>
>>30913690
>”Alright my little stallion. Get up here.”
>You tugged the leash and he went up, oh you knew just where you wanted him.
>You hiked that leash until he was at your backside, then pressed him back.
>He tried to get steady, ready to mount you when you swept out his hinds and dropped him on his rear.
>”Oh no, you’re not riding me.”
>You lowered the leash as he fell back against the pillows.
>Flagging your tail, you got ready.
>”I’m riding you.”
>He got the message, and leaned forward taking a long slow lick from top to bottom and back.
>You shiver, a little whinny at how long its been since you felt this came from your lips.
>You step and restep on the bed, trying to keep the tongue there as he went.
>Not that you should have worried, he was all too happy to give in and start licking.
>He hooked his forelegs on your hinds and went to work.
>Practiced experienced licks, short licks, long licks, patterns.
>He knew what to do with a mare, and you were all too pleased with it.
>Your slave just sat at the corner of the bed, eyes zoned out and drool falling from an open mouth.
>You almost fell over and lost the moment when you saw her looking at you like that, but Ruin simply held you up right and get eating you out.
>You tugged on the bat pony and guided her up.
>”Fluff him.”
>She didn’t need to be told again, and crawled under you, her words replaced by her own licks and preparations to his groin.
>You couldn’t see what she was doing, but it must have been spirited.
>Her rump kept pushing around in the mirror and her mane kept tickling your belly.
>You let her get good and ready, when you guessed she was starting to bob, you knew it was time.
>”Switch.”
>You pulled forward, releasing Rubble from the back of the bed.
>”Rubble. Head at the foot of the bed, belly up. Bash. Off the bed.”
>The two complied, and you were quickly ready to mount Rubble and start bucking your brains out the proper way.

Let Bash have some tongue fun or keep her as an unfeeling tool?
>>
>>30910876
I like this new development. He should make sure to keep an eye on Lavender around him, though. She already has anger issues, the last thing he needs is for her to take advantage of her position of strength over him and maim or mutilate the guy in a fit.
>>
>>30913702
Let her have her fun, better start working on the Stockholm now.
>>
>>30913367
AJ being spanked until the stubbornness is spanked out of her and her butt looks like a red neon lightbulb when
>>
>>30845518
>mammoh

Dont continue this way.
I gave up after 3-4 post because its unreadable. Dont know whos speaking, seems like the lines (order) are changed up sometimes. Also why the double spacing? Are you have more autism than us or something?

Re-read and edit this shit properly then repost it. Then continue.
>>
>>30912712
Don't forget that this anon is a druggie. That probably explains the "going pretty fast" thing.
>>
>>30913764
You just want a threesome there don't you?
>>
>>30913702
>Be a fun mistress, or unfeeling tool?
Commanding them together is almost more satisfying than the actual sex. Bash is not going anywhere, she's cumming with us!

You were worried about writing clop, but you're doing great so far. Having them tied nose to tail on the way home was genius.
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>>30906276
>>30907696
>>30913380
>>30913346
I see you're men of culture as well.

>>30890021

[Homewrecker]

Rarity
~~~~~~
>Oh my, that much anger isn't good for her complexion.
>You jump off his lap as she comes storming over, but she manages to grab a handful of beautiful tail before you can escape!
>Not the curls! anything but the curls!
>Your fabulous style become the least of your concerns when a hand lands firmly across your backside! Oww!
>fortunately your exaggerated whinny gets you the sympathy you need from her husband.
>"Fem stop!"
>The handsome hero steps between you and the angry female, breaking her hold on your tail in the process.
>Time to make yourself scarce.
>You scamper off to the top of the stairs, close enough to hear the argument but far enough to remain safe from further outbursts.
>"I want to spank it!"
>"What? Why? Fem it's a horse it didn't do anything wrong. It's my fault for not looking where I put my hand."
>"It knows what it's doing Anon! It's always giving me that smug grin! It knows, and I want to beat it's ass!"
>Normally you'd take pride in angering her, but your hide is really burning from just the one smack.
>"Oh my god fem, you are not SPANKING OUR HORSE! A.) because that's crazy, and B.) because it's got a white coat, and you know they're cracking down on pony abuse cases left and right."
>"It's never going to learn if we don't do something! Ground it, scold it, do something!"
>"You want me to ground a horse? From what? Her own chores? She doesn't have a lot going for her."
>"It has a roof over it's head and food in it's stomach, but it has the gall to keep pulling shit like this! Where did it go?"
>"You probably scared the poor girl into hiding. I really can't believe you're getting jealous of a slave fem, this is just ridiculous."
>Sounds like you've already trained him well. The role of poor, confused, innocent animal is an easy one, especially for one as beautiful as yourself.
>>
>>30914664
>The argument dragged on but you'd heard the important bits. She wanted to tan your flanks and he wasn't having it.
>Really, you can't blame her. If you were in her shoes you'd do something similar. Too bad for her you've already got him on your side.
>Ah humans, it's almost too easy.
>You hide in your room when she storms past. No doubt she'll stay up here while he's banished to the couch for the night.
>Ever the opportunist, you grab one of your pillows off your bed and trot downstairs.
>What a helpful assistant you are, bringing him one of your own pillows in his time of need.
>"Thanks girl."
>He takes the gift with one hand and cups your face with the other. Naturally, you nuzzle into it encouragingly.
>"I'm sorry about her. I just don't know what's up with her lately, are you hurt?"
>Splaying your ears and looking downtrodden as you nod is all it takes to earn his compassion. He gathers you up in his arms in a manner most satisfactory.
>An innocent lick to the underside of his chin earns you a genuine smile and even closer snuggling.
>You do actually hate to seem him upset, but if it gets you closer to him then it's for a good cause.
>Hopefully your firm flanks resting right on his lap will give him something else to think about. It sting a bit sitting on the spot she just abused but the effect is worth the pain.
>"Wants to spank you... Hell, I should spank her..."
>Oh, now there's an idea. The mental image of the witch bent over master's lap learning her lesson makes you smile.
>Perhaps you can frame her somehow, you'd love to hear her crying and howling from some swift justice.
>These are concerns for another day though.
>Right now the fingers he's running down your spine are really making your purr, quite literally. You are sure to reward him with some good firm lap wiggling, a gift any male would appreciate.
>>
>>30914674
>Your task may be seduction, but his warm comforting embrace makes focus a bit difficult. Your eyelids are so heavy, perhaps just a moment to rest your eyes...

Femanon
~~~~~~~
>You now officially regret asking him to buy you that whorse.
>Not only was she the price of a new car, but she's behaves worse than a teenager.
>There has to be something you can do. Anon insists on no spanking, so you're currently online looking up alternative pony discipline methods.
>Most suggestions you find seem a bit tame: A spray bottle of water, taking away treats, scolding. those might work on some of the pastel creatures, but you doubt it would effect this hardened brat.
>A quick google search of 'pony domestic discipline' at least tells you aren't the only person considering this.
>There's a few articles of people getting in trouble for it, but also plenty of forum posts confirming yours won't be the first of her kind given a firm lesson.
>This lady even recommends using a hairbrush. You pick up one off your dresser and hit it against the palm of your hand.
>Just what the little skank needs.
>You'll at least wait until she does something else to earn it though, something you can justify to anon.
>Knowing her that won't take long, so no worries there.
>You surf a while longer until it's time for bed.
>Sleep takes a while when you're so fired up. Hopefully you'll feel better about all this tomorrow.

>It's a new morning and a new day.
>The events of yesterday are far from forgotten, but you're going to start the day fresh.
>You're even willing to give that stupid horse the benefit of the doubt.
>Maybe she's just been reacting to all the negativity you've projected at her.
>Maybe the two of you can turn over a new leaf, start fresh.
>Maybe she's currently sleeping on top of your husband's chest and you're going to skin her alive.
>You CALMLY stride over to the sleeping pair.
"Anon dear? Darling? Love? Sweetheart?"
>>
>>30914677
>He stirs but doesn't open his eye. He always was a heavy sleeper.
>"Five more minutes..."
"Oh, of course dear. Right after you tell me why your 'little buddy' is SLEEPING WITH YOU!?
>He groans when he looks down and sees the little pony.
>"Shit. I dunno fem, I guess we fell asleep watching TV."
>You grab the sleeping hussy by the collar and bodily drag her off your man.
>"Neigh!"
>"Fem. Just, just chill."
>They both attempt to rub the sleep out of their eyes. Maybe it's not fair interrogating them while they're still half asleep, but the evidence was pretty damning.
"You."
>Squatting down you snap your fingers in front of the sleepy horse's face.
"To your room, now."
>That was probably a sassy whinny but you don't speak horse.
"Go, now. You can start your chores later."
>You points towards her room again and she wanders off with a yawn. Knowing her she'll fall back asleep, but It doesn't matter. You have plans for her later.
"Really Anon? First yesterday and now this?"
>"Ugh, we fell asleep."
"You 'accidently' grabbed it's ass and now you 'accidently' fell asleep with it? No wonder it think it runs the damn house!"
>"Can we just talk about this later? I don't need this right before my shift."
>That's reasonable, but he's still going to get a harsh glare.
>Really you blame that stupid horse more than him. It might have even climbed up there after he'd fall asleep, you wouldn't put that past her.
"Fine, but this isn't over."
>"Yeah, yeah I know."
>He slips past you towards the shower.
>So much for turning over a new leaf.
>After Anon leaves for work you go to put your plan into action. Picking up the hairbrush you head towards the white terror's room.
>She's sitting at her dresser fixing her hair. The fact that a horse came with it's own beauty products and could do it's own hair is still astounding, but not what you cared about right now.
>It quit humming it's weird horse tune and turns to give you an innocently questioning look.
>>
>>30914690
"Don't you play dumb with me."
>You can practically hear it say 'moi' as it point to it's chest and tilts it's head.
"Yeah, you. I've had just about enough of your messing around with him.
>She points one hoof towards herself, and one in his general direction, before pushing the two together and making kissy noises!
"That's it!"
>You lunge at the whorse and manage to grab her by the collar again!
"I don't care what Anon says! You're going to learn a lesson!"
>*Panicked horse noises!*

Rarity
~~~~~~~~~
>She may not be able to understand you, but you're hoping panicked horse noises is a universal language!
"Let me go! What are you doing?!"
>"You think you can come into my house!"
>She pulls you off your vanity stool and take a seat on it herself.
>"Mess with my husband-"
>Oh no, this is really happening!
>"And disrespect me?!"
>He said no! She can't do this!
>Being dragged by the collar isn't easy to resist.
>Digging your hooves in the carpet fails to even slows her down, as she drags you closer and closer to her lap!
"No! No, please! You can't!"
>"Get up here!"
>She's pointing at her lap.
>You know what exactly happens over a lap in a situation like this, and have no intention of cooperating!
>All you can do is shake your head and try to backpedal.
>"Oh my god you are such a brat."
>Ow! Her other hand takes a firm grip of your tail as she attempts to marehandle you into position!
>Tails aren't meant to be pulled like that! Ouch!
>You try to put up a good fight, but it only takes her a few painful moment to drag you into position!
"F-fem wait!"
>"I don't speak neigh Rarity! If you want to make this easier on yourself then take your discipline like a big mare!"
"Mistress please!"
>Perhaps it's a blessing she can't understand you. You'd never called her mistress before and even now it makes you burn in shame.
>"Now be *SMACK* a good *SMACK* girl!"
>Easier said than done! It's just her hand, but, oh how it stings!
>>
>>30914697
>"You've had an attitude from day one!"
*Thwack thwack thwack!*
>"We brought you into our home-"
*Slap slap slap!*
>"Even gave you your own room, and what do I get for it? Attitude!"
*Whack!*
"Owwww! Ohhh! Alright! Alright, quit it!"
>It's only been a couple minutes, but you seat is already feeling well warmed! Where did she learn to wear out ponies like this!?
>The assault on your flank steadily continues despite your squirming!
>"Did you really think you could get away with trying to steal my man!? Just because you have these huge hips, doesn't mean you can get away with anything you want!"
>You can't help but thrash your head and kick your legs! This has to be over soon, or your perfect derriere will be covered in marks!
>You endure a few more seconds of teeth clenching spanking before she finally stops.
>"God why is your ass so big? We're putting you on a diet."
>Rude!
>You can feel the heat radiating off your cheeks already, you don't need her calling you fat as well!
>You'll get the witch for this, you swear it! She's just jealous that she's all bone and your perfectly curved!
>Maybe Anon will follow through on his idea to spank her. You could go crying to him as soon as he gets home. That would get his sympathy for sure.
>Further scheming is brought to a crashing halt when something else touches your raised posterior!
>No! No, she can't be serious!
>You twist your head around to look back over your plump pink rump. No! That's your brush! Your heavy antique solid oak brush!
>The wide eyed expression of terror must have given you away.
>"Oh so you know what this does? Not your first time spanked with a brush then?"
*THWACK!*
"AHHHH!"
>Your head snaps back forward to squeal loudly! It hurts so much!
>"I guess it's no surprised you're used to this kind of treatment!"
*Smack smack smack!*
"Ohhhhhh pleaseeeeeee!"
>"Did you last owner have to do this too?"
>She grabs a handful of mane and pulls your head back when you fail to answer.
>>
>>30914709
>"Well?"
>Two more painful swats land to motivate the answer out of you!
>You desperately shake your head sending tears flying all over the room.
>"Your mother then?"
>Yes, but you'll be damned if you're going to admit you were a spanked filly to this bitch!
>"Tell *Smack* the *Spank* truth *Whack* Rarity!"
"Yes yes yes!"
>You nod your head violently even as she continues to paint your beautiful backside red!
>Oh sweet Celestia she's smacking so hard! Each one must be leaving a bright red oval on your perfect hiney!
>You stomp your forehooves and cry with abandon! The pain is just too much!
>"Am I getting through to you now!? I think you just might be learning for once in your life!"
"Mistress pleaseeeee! I'll do anything! I'll be good! I'm sorrryyyyyy!"
>It's like sitting on hot coals! Now he'll never look at you again. You must look like a chastised foal with a hind end as red as big mac's!
>After what must have been solid minutes of thumping your tushy into submission she finally stops.
>What doesn't stop is your pathetic crying and gasping. This is worse than your mother ever was!
>Any relief you experienced from the break is short lived when she once again pats the wooden torture device again your throbbing bottom.
>"Have you changed your mind?"
>You simply can't take any more 'motivation' to behave, so you nod your head obediently.
>"Are you going to respect me!"
>The last two words are punctuated by light swats to your fanny. Light enough to not count as a real spank, but heavy enough on your damaged cheeks to refresh your crying.
>Needless to say you're nodding is even more enthusiastic to that question.
>"5 more."
"No no nooooooo please!"
*SMACK*
"PLEASE MISTRESS PLEASE!"
*WHACK*
"I'M SO SORRYYYYY!"
*WHAM!*
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!"
*SLAP SPANK!"
>The last two in quick succession makes you scream and bawl like never before!
>You'll never be able to sit again! She's ruined your beautiful body! Who will want a mare with a permanently bruised butt!?
>>
>>30914714
>"Shhhhhh. It's over, it's ok."
>Easy for her to say!
>The one hand rubbing your back and other on you abused cheeks helps, but Luna above it's like your rear was banished to tartarus!
>And now your makeup is ruined! You'll probably be marked forever! He'll just laugh at you instead of being seduced! You're life is over!
>It's hard to say how long you laid there ruing your life, but she continues to sooth you the entire time.
>"I'll make lunch today. I want you to just stay here and think about what you've done, ok?"
"Yes ma'am..."
>"That sounded like a yes."
>She gently lifts you up off her lap and deposits you in your bed.
>The defensive ball you curl into is pathetic but who cares right now.
>"Come down when you're ready, I'll still want your help for dinner."
>Dinner. Like food matters, like anything matters, like your life isn't over!

>It takes a few hours, but you do change your mind about how much food matters. The carrot soup she brought you for lunch is actually quite good.
>You still hate everything though.
>Hearing him arrive home just reminds you of how much you hate everything.
>He was a few hours later than usual. Perhaps that was a blessing, less time for him to see you like this.
>Too bad even blessings don't last forever.
>He eventually came looking for his 'couch buddy' later that night, and found your in your pathetic state.
>You'd checked the damage in the mirror, it was... extensive.
>The perfect white posterior you worked so hard on was covered in angry red blotches. Simply sitting down is now a quick reminder of where you behavior got you.
>You were just glad he didn't laugh, or tell you it was your fault.
>>
>>30914718
>It was a bit odd how he left the room so quickly, but he probably just didn't want to be around something as pathetic as you anymore.
*THWACK*
>"OWWW! What the fuck!?"
>What? What was that!?
>"What are you...? No, wait we can talk this out!"
*SPANK SPANK SPANK!*
>Your grin could light the heavens!
>Buck feeling bad for yourself! You gallop to master's bedroom door and place your ear on it.
>"Didn't I tell you no!? What happens if we get arrested Fem?! Is that what you want!?"
*SMACK SMACK SMACK!*
>"No! no! Quit it!!"
>There is justice in the world!
>>
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>>30914722
that's pretty much all I had planned for this for the time being. It will still be my guilty pleasure every now and then, but for now back to my other stories.

pastebin: https://pastebin.com/4WLWT4eU
>>
>>30914722
Hot ending. Although I'll say that Rarity obviously hasn't learned her lesson on not being a bratty little imp yet. I'd spank her every day for a week just as hard as this each time, a slave spanking boot camp for rebellious and defiant slaves.
>>
>>30913702
Keep her as a tool.
Slaves are property, Bash is just a very exotic sex toy to us.
>>
>>30910824
You're telling me that all this time has been a physically and mentally functional pony? She has only pretended to be broken for not working?

Better give it to Lavender again
>>
>>30915600
>She

>>30915600
Sorry, Him, not "She"
>>
>>30910833
>The certainty in my voice helped. I had some experience with pony nobility. It wasn't too hard to break them, once you got past the clout and hauteur.

I would like a story where Anon trains Jet Set and Upper crust, or at least Fleur de Lys
>>
>>30910876
Great update AWF It seems to finally Lavender and Anon found that 'something' they needed to improve their relationship, must feel ironic for jthe crystal pony apply the methods she despised in her former lover, but on the other hand finally understands that there are people or ponies who need something more than understanding and patience to improve their lives and I'm sure she enjoyed 'educating' Opal Gleam, just hope it does not end up becoming too... obedient
>>
Ponies on a boat?
>>
>>30916359
niggas on a boat
>>
>>30914722
Am I the only one tired of overdone spanking scenes? I mean i guess thats just a vega thing but i can only read "thwap ow thwap ow" so many times before it gets irritating
>>
>>30914674
I wonder if Rarity development true feelings for Anon or all part of the act
>>
>>30916699
Doesn't seem overdone to me. The spanking itself is really only 3 of the 9 posts. There's a clear progression in the events and what femanon is scolding her for. It's not like it's just the word whack over and over again.
>>
>>30914722
Now you no longer think.

On one Femanon established its dominance as the alpha female and all that, but when Anon decides to provide its own form of dominance makes me feel good by Rarity.

I hope this does not turn into a vicious circle for the three
>>
>>30914883
>a slave spanking boot camp
Better than beatings... I think? I'm sure rarity would be placed in the advanced courses in no time.
>>
>>30917035
>Rarity
>being sent to a spanking bootcamp
That's called 'smurfing'.
>>
>>30914722
That pouty shit-eater, she still got her revenge. But it was fun to read, ah tell ya.
>>
>>30917153
Once they saw her shrug off her first session with someone's hand they'd break out the brush pretty quickly. Or better yet, if she's such a pro she could be a teachers aid, someone has to be the example after all.
>>
Slave is for submission.
>>
>>30917886
But what if subby buys slave?
>>
>>30917898
Then it better be an erf poner so they can be dominated by a superior being.
Pegasi are just slutts.
Unicorns are so into roles and playing them they would never dream of being a dominant slave.
>>
>>30914722
In what year is this going on that a man can just bend his wife over an spank her like a child?
>>
>>30918490
Same year that slavery is suddenly ok again.
>>
>>30918496
So a successful post Trump era with muh waifu is real and I am free?
>>
>>30918490
It probably still happens in some rural areas of the south to be honest.
>>
>>30918490
In that year when skinny woman is light enough to lift by average angry man
>>
Sorry its a few hours late. Updated the pastebin first for those who want to read it that way.

The Sun will rise again: Part 4

>“Anon…”
>“Anon?”
>“Are you listening anon?”
>You shake your head and refocus on the conversation.
“Yea, sorry, spaced out for a second. You were saying?”
>”I wonder if you’re even all there sometimes...” She gives you a pitying look.
>You smirk and motion for her to continue.
>You're sitting in a quiet cafe on a warm Saturday morning. It’s one you are both quite familiar with. The blonde woman in a green floral dress sitting across from you now finally winding down from one of her classic tirades.
>You have a window seat where you can see people strolling the streets, a few of them accompanied by their slave ponies.
>The little horses are walking alongside them. A few of them even dressed up by their handlers. Most of those ones are smiling with joy. Eagerly hopping along and chatting with their owners. Eyes vacant and indifferent to the world around them.
>Others are either pulled on leashes or dragging their hooves with their heads down. Some of them even glancing longingly at the passing traffic. Bruises and other small signs of abuse visible on them as they fearfully trot.
>"So in the end I'm the one who gets dumped in the shit even though I could see this coming from fucking years away."
>Shit, you didn’t catch the end of what she was saying.
"Christ that fucking blows, babe. Did you manage to keep records of all the correspondence you sent to each other?"
>"Yeah, but if I don't play my cards right here then I'm up shit creek, right? Either I speak up, get thrown under the bus, get fired, press charges and give my side of the story, clear my name, and no one takes a chance with me again; or I keep my head down, roll with the punches, and try to come out the other side without too many scars." She stares daggers at her coffee before picking up the cup and gulping down its contents.
>>
>>30918856
Pastebin btw https://pastebin.com/kqYNQ4b5

"Or you could resign, you know? You don’t have to do this kind of thing." She pauses and puts down the cup.
>She turns her piercing blue orbs at you, a heavy frown on her face.
>"Anon, I know you'll always take care of me." Her frown lifts into a gentle smile as she places a hand on yours. "But if I don't do something with myself, I'll go mad."
"Oh, I thought you already were mad. Could have fooled me." She smirks at you.
>"I already did fool you, cutie. Or did you miss the part where I tricked you into buying me this stupidly overpriced rock." She wiggles her fingers, reminding you of the modest engagement ring that sits on her ring finger.
>"I can't just travel the world or live in peace and quiet until the end of my days. I'm like a dog that has to chase a car.” She lets out a sigh and rubs the bridge of her nose.
>”There are so many of them that need our help, and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I was just wasting all the gifts that I've been given. I thought you knew that when you gave me this?"
"Babe, I've known you were a dog for a while now, so I guess it's not too much of a surprise..."
>She feigns a shocked look on her face. A hand rising to cover up her mouth in mock offense.
>"Well, I never! Pray, tell what misguided misconceptions have led you to believe that a fair maiden such as I would be confused for such a mindless beast."
"Hmm... If I had to say, you were acting a lot like a mindless beast the other night." She smirks and slaps your hand, a tint of red on her cheeks.
"I mean if we're talking about dogs, you were pretty much acting like a bitch in he-"
>"Anon!"
>She slaps your hand jokingly again, her face going crimson as she lets out a small laugh. You chuckle back at her.
>>
>>30918861

"What, just calling it like I see it, gorgeous. Though -- speaking of animals -- I guess it is hard to maintain your composure when you're with a stallion like mys-"
>"Eh hem"
>Something interrupts you from the side of the table. Looking over, you see a rather irate pony with a light blue coat and a brown short cropped mane dressed up in a simple maid's uniform.
>Honestly, it looks a bit ridiculous, but you hold your tongue. The poor mare doesn't need that kind of comment. The shock collar around her neck more than speaks for the slave’s situation.
>You quickly realize she's carrying your food on plates balanced precariously on her back. How they managed to do that without spilling everything you'd never know.
"Ah, thanks..."
>You sit back and let the pony serve your food. It’s an incredible show of dexterity as she twists her neck behind her, lifts one plate in her mouth by biting on a rubber grip on the side of it, twists back, and deposits it on the table.
>Your fiancée stares as well. Her face wrought with sadness. Eventually the pony finishes, sits back, and pulls a pencil and notepad from her pockets.”
>"Is there anything else, I can get you guys?"
“I’m right thanks, how about you, babe?”
>She’s already searching through her purse as you ask. Pulling out a twenty dollar bill, she reaches over and tucks it into a front pocket on the pony’s uniform.
>”Don’t tell your owner, okay?” Tapping her nose and giving a wink, she smiles at the stunned little horse.
>The pony snaps herself out of the trance and puts the writing materials away. She shifts nervously on her hooves for a moment before mouthing a ‘thank you’ and scurrying back to the kitchen.
>It’s not the first time you’ve seen her do something like this.
“You really do care for those things, don’t you?”
>>
>>30918863

>She smiles as she regains her composure.
>”You know that I do… It’s why I fight so hard for them.” You reach over and grab her hand, rubbing it gently.
“I know, babe.” You gently reassure her before your attention shifts to your food and you both dig in.
>The meal passes in a pleasant silence, only interrupted when your fiancée speaks up.
>“So... there’s, uh, some things I’ve been meaning to bring up Anon...“ She begins while wringing her hands on the table.
“Yeah.” You respond with a mouth full of food, eliciting a giggle.
>“So, we’ve been going out together for a while... right?”
“Yeah, what about it?”
>”Well, I was thinking…”
“Thinking about…?”
>”What if we…”
“What if we, what?
>”What if we bought a pony?”
>You almost spit out your food.
“Babe, I thought we talked about this…” She winces.
>”I know I know, I just… I just thought it might be a good trial run…”
“Trial run? What for?”
>“And they would be able to help out when we’re too busy!”
“Whoa, honey, honey, slow down! Busy with what?”
>She takes a deep breath and looks you straight in the eye.
>”We’ve been together a lot lately… And I’ve checked. And I’ve checked. And I’ve tripled checked”
>You feel your heartbeat quicken.
>”And I’m late.”
>The gears in your head slow to a crawl. You stare at her for a few moments, slowly soaking in the meaning behind her statement.
“You’re late?” You slowly get out of your seat.
>”Uhuh.”
“You’re -that- kind of late?”
>”Mmhmm.” She looks at you with tears pooling in the corner of her eyes. The biggest and most loving smile you’ve ever seen on her face. The smile that won your heart.
”Hey, what does ‘mmhmm’ mean, babe?” You pull her out of the seat and hold her hands in your own.
>“Anon… I think we're going to have a baby!”
>>
>>30918871

>You immediately wrap her in your strong arms, pulling her into a hug and holding her face to your chest. You’re so happy in this moment you think your heart might burst from your chest. You take deep joyful gasps of air as you feel the beginnings of hot tears stream down your cheeks.
>”Anon…”
>She whispers your name as your stroke her hair.
>”Anon…”
>You kiss her on the head.
>”Anon…”
“It’s ok, Jessica. I’m just so happy”
>”Anon…”
>She repeats your name, though the tone of her voice is shifting.
>“Anon.”
>You look down at her. Face still buried in your chest.
>“Anon.”
“Babe, what’s wrong?”
>”Anon.”
>You try to push her back to get a look at her, but she just tightens her grip.
>”Anon.”
>Her voice is getting louder each time she says your name.
>”Anon.”
“Jessica, what are you doing?”
>”Anon. Please wake up.”
“No…”
>”You need to wake up!”
“No, no, no, no, no!”
>“Anon, I need your help, please wake up!”
>She’s yelling at you now, her voice now that of a different person than the one in your arms. With all your strength your push her off of you. You look at her face. Panics spikes through your heart. It’s wrong. All wrong. Deep red crimson lines of blood from fresh wounds run through her now bruised visage. Her eyes are murky, and the skin of her arms has gone lifelessly pale.
>”Please, Anon! It hurts too much!”
>>
>>30918880

>You hear the revving of a car engine and the screech of car wheels nearby as she begins to scream. You look up and see vehicles of all shapes and sizes accelerating towards the cafe window.
>Calls for help go unheard as you wildly search for safety. All the staff and patrons are gone. The furniture has also vanished. The only thing still left in the room is a big iron cage holding the pony who served you food. Her body a crumpled rotting husk, wrapped up in a filthy maids outfit and deposited unceremoniously in the corner. A twenty dollar note clutched tightly in between her broken, festering hooves.
>With a roar, you cry out and pull Jessica back to you, but her body turns to ash in your arms. You look up just as the first car comes careening through the window, a scream of fear shrieking from your mouth as it collides with you, sending you flying back into darkness.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-”
>>
>>30918888

“-AAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!”
>”AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!”
>You lurch out of bed, sweat dripping from your body while your mind struggles to get rolling.
>Looking around, you see the big white pony you saved yesterday is shrieking while keeled over. Her hooves held tightly to her abdomen.
>Celestia’s face is a twisted expression of pain. Her body shudders and convulses with each wave of agony washing over it. Wings flail limply on her back and fresh screams escape from her now hoarse throat.
>You soak in the sight. With a quick shake you brush of the dream and your grogginess from the rude awakening. Something is terribly wrong with the poor mare and you need to act fast.
“Celestia! Celestia!? What in god’s name is going on? What’s happening?” She looks up at you with bloodshot eyes as you carefully place a hand on her cheek.
>“I-I need it A-Anon. I-I n-need the thing he’d g-give m-meeeeAAAAAAAA-” She screams again as another wave of pain wracks her body.
>You look at her miserable form and connect the dots in your head. If this is just the start of withdrawal symptoms, then you are in no way equipped to handle this by yourself.
>Grabbing your phone and leaping off the bed, you sprint through the dark house to the laundry and search through your smelly discarded clothes. The poor mare wails at being left alone.
>You find the plastic bag that Mark gave you, the nondescript pills still safe within, although something gives you pause. Celestia is no longer screaming from the room.
>After a brief moment of hesitation, you unlock your phone and scroll through the numbers until you find the one for the vet that Mark recommended. You call the number and quickly run back to your bedroom, checking on the now suspiciously quiet mare.
>>
>>30918895

>You carefully peek around the doorway. The poor creature lies motionless on the bed. For a brief moment you think the worst has happened, until she takes a shuddering breath, her chest rising and falling. She’s still there, still huddled over in pain, and still shaking slightly every now and then.
>You go into a nearby room, a study, and cross your fingers that someone will answer you at whatever ungodly hour this is.
>Your prayers are answered as the line picks up. Though before you can speak, you’re forced to pull the phone away from your ear as a barrage of shouting comes through the line.
>“I’m answering the FUCKING PHONE!”
>”Yeah, just fucking walk away why don’t you!”
“Hello?” You try to get the attention of the man and woman on the other side of the line.
>”Excuse me?! I’m trying my best here, and feeding your lazy four legged ass is expensive!”
>”Lazy?! I’m sorry, I missed the part where I was allowed to walk outside by myself without getting BEATEN, DRUGGED, AND THROWN IN CHAINS!”
“Hello!? I really need some help here!” You check back in on Celestia, the poor bandaged pony still curled up in pain on the bed.
>”That’s not fair... You know I didn’t mean it like that. Please, let me take this. It could be a client.”
>”Bet it’s just another abusive asshole who wants us to fix his toy.
>”Those ‘abusive assholes’ are the ones that pay the rent dickhead. That attitude of yours is why we can’t get any work anymore, remember?”
>”My attitude?! Sorry, I can’t be all smiles and cheer while the rest of my kind live stripped of their rights and ABUSED!”
>Another bout of yelling and shouting erupts from the phone. You idly thumb the pills in your pocket and watch Celestia. She lets out a small whimper every now and again. You’ve about made up your mind when you hear a voice calling out from the phone.
>>
>>30918898

>”Hello? Hello? Are you still there? Oh, please tell me you’re sti-”
“Yes, hello! I was told that I could reach a vet by the name of Emily on this number.”
>”Oh! Oh yes! YES! This is Emily and co.’s Equine Veterinary Practice. Sorry for what you just heard, you just caught me at a bad time. I mean it is, uh… 3:30 in the morning? Christ!”
“Thank god…”
>You sigh in relief. In the meantime, small whimpers have started escaping Celestia’s mouth. You continue talking as you keep an eye on her.
“I know it's probably not what you wanted to hear, but I need some urgent consultation on a mare I’ve recently purchased.
>”... God damnit.” You hear a sigh from the other end of the phone as all the energy leaves Emily’s voice.
>”I was right wasn’t I?”
>”Shut up, asshole!”
“Hey, hey! Are you going to help me here? Or am I going to have to help this poor pony alone?” She stays silent for a few moments.
>”Why can’t you just get some other vet to do this? I really don-”
“Because this isn’t a problem I can go to other vets for help with! Alright?”
>”Anooon… Where did you gooooo?” Celestia calls out in a strangled cry from the bed. You lower the phone while you approach her and stroke her back.
“Easy girl, Easy. I never left you.” She reaches out and grabs your shorts with a curled hoof.
>”Please, Anon. It hurts so much… I need it...”
“I’m trying, Celly. Just try to be a strong mare for me for a little longer, okay?”
>”Mmhmm”
>You smirk and pull the phone back up.
“So I need an answer now, Emily.”
>”Hey, what's going on, Emily? What’s with that look? What’s that guy saying to you?” You hear the stallion talking as Emily takes a sharp intake of breath.
>>
>>30918902

>”Alright, but on one condition. You tell me right now what's wrong with her and you don’t dare lie to me. Don’t you dare think about it, even for a second; or I call the cops and tell them I received a call from someone in trouble and point them in your direction.”
>You swallow heavily and begin.
“I picked her up yesterday, shortly after midday, from a handler named Mark.”
>”Oh Christ you’re one of Mark’s customers.”
>”Oh shit, Emily. What are you doing still talking to him?”
“WAIT!”
>”Talk fast, Mr… Anon was it? And be advised you’re on a knife’s edge here.”
“Okay. Okay. I picked her up and drove her straight home. I washed and cleaned her up, gave her some food and then we went to bed.”
>“You sick fuck! Taking advantage of a mare in that position!”
>”Christ, don’t even bother Emily.”
“Hold on! It’s not like tha-” You’re distracted mid-sentence as Celestia starts retching. “Oh no, Celly, wa-!”
>It’s too late as Celestia pathetically spews her dinner across the base of the bed, painting the navy-blue sheets a sick brown-green colour. There’s even some carrot in the disgusting mixture, even though you know you didn’t feed her any.
>”What was that, Anon? What in god’s name are you doing to her?” You feel a fuse blow.
“You hear that Emily? That is the sound of a sick pony that needs help. That is the sound of a fucking sick as a dog mare throwing up all over my bed Now I’m fucking winging it here, and I’m getting tired of these accusations you’re hurling at me. So you stay fucking quiet while I give you the full story. And no interjections!” The line goes quiet for a moment. “Are we on the same page here, Emily?”
>”You’ve got 30 seconds.” You sigh and take a deep breath.
>>
>>30918912

“Yesterday, I pick her up from Mark’s warehouse. She’s in bad shape when I find her, worse than bad. I find out that Mark has her hooked on some heavy shit. I buy her. I bring her home. I spend hours cleaning the literal shit and piss out of her fucking fur. I even get bitten by her. Twice! ”
>Emily stays quiet and you can hear your voice repeating back to you. They’ve put you on loudspeaker. You couldn’t give two shits right now.
“But I took it in stride. I wrap all her damaged hooves and various wounds in bandages so they don’t get worse. I dry her off. I give her some dinner. I carry the poor fucking thing to my bed because she’s so pathetically malnourished that she can barely stand on her own hooves. I brush her god damned mane because it’s mangled with split hairs. And then we go to sleep. Nothing else!
>You know you’re going a bit off the rails at the moment, but you can’t stop you’re own momentum.
“I then wake up halfway in the night to her screaming while curled over in a ball, clutching her sides and calling my name for help! I think its withdrawal and go to grab some of the fucking drugs I bought off Mark, but I stop and think ‘Hey, maybe it's a good idea to get a second opinion before I start shoving pills down her throat.’ And then that second opinion does nothing but have a domestic spat while she gets worse and worse! Now... Can. You. Help. Me?!”
>You stand there, slightly panting while reflecting on what you just did. After ten seconds of no response, regret begins to stew in your gut.
>>
>>30918914

>Celestia weakly tugs on your shorts. You glance over to her still curled up in pain. She weakly smiles at you, even as her body shivers and a trail of vomit drips down her muzzle. Your heart sinks. You fidget with the drugs in your pocket, you can probably put a stop to this right now.
>”Anon, are you there?” A deep masculine voices reaches your ear.
“Yes.”
>”I have one question that I want you to answer before we make a decision.”
“And that is?” There’s another brief pause.
>”Why did you buy her?”
>A million thoughts race through your head in an instant. One moment stands clear above the rest in your memory.
”I could tell you any number of reasons, like: ‘I wanted to get her out of there,’ or ‘I couldn’t stand the thought of leaving her to suffer in that place’. I’m not interested in having a slave that I can torment if that’s what you’re asking. But if you’re really asking me why…”
>”I am.”
>You pull your hand out and carefully clean the side of Celestia’s face, wiping it afterwards on the sheets. Her smile now slowly falling apart and her eyes shutting tight as her face is wracked with agony again.
“I just want to see her smiling face again.”
>”Hmph.” That’s all the response you get before you hear the faint clip clop of hooves walking away. A scrambling sound comes through the phone shortly followed by a familiar voice.
>”Alright, Anon. It’s Emily. We’ll help.” You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding.
>>
>>30918919

>”So, If that pony is in withdrawal, I need to know what she’s withdrawing from. Now if I know Mark -- which I unfortunately do -- and you say this is a problem you can only talk to me about, then what you’re about to get me in involved is probably barely legal at best. So tell me straight up: what was Mark giving to her?”
“Estrus Stimulants.” You say without hesitation.
>”Oh god, Estrus?”
>”That fucking cunt, Mark, is dead the next time he shows his face!” You hear the stallion yell out in the background.
>“Stint! Settle down, would you? Okay, okay, you said you bought some of those pills from him?” You grunt in acknowledgement.
>”How much did he say to give her and how often?”
”He didn’t say really. I asked for a weeks’ worth and he handed me thirteen pills.”
>”Thirteen pills in a single week? How is the poor mare not insane?”
>”You’re fucking joking right? Thirteen? What was he trying to do? Make her go feral?”
>”He probably doesn’t even know…”
>”He doesn’t give two shits is more like it.” Celestia lets out a pained groan as another tremor rocks through her body.
“Oi, talk to me. She’s getting worse while you two are squabbling like a married couple.”
>They murmur back and forth for a bit longer before continuing.
>”Alright, Anon. It’s a good thing that you called us. If you had given her a whole pill, it likely would have done more harm than good.”
“Okay. Good.”
>”Now. I assume you want to detox her, right?”
“Correct.” You hear a sigh of relief from the other end of the phone.
>”I’d like to say make her go cold turkey; but with estrus stimulants, going through detox without medical support can be very dangerous. I think you’ve seen the start of what can go wrong.”
“If it’s going to get worse from here, what can we do?”
>>
>>30918924

>”I’d like to help you detox her, but that’s going to take some time to prepare. We’ll also need some money paid upfront, but only because we need to order in specific supplies for this.
”We’ll sort that out as we go, money isn’t a concern. What do you want me to do in the meantime? Drive her out to you?”
>”Well, um, god... Is it really alright if we say this, Stint?”
>”I think we don’t have any other options at this point. We can’t take the risk.” He sounds hesitant.
>”Alright, Anon, I’m giving you the go ahead to give her half a pill now. She should settle down in a short while, and, uh, be more, um, relaxed?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
>”Oh, nothing. I’m sure you’ll notice when it happens. Still, keep a close eye on her and give her another half a pill no sooner than 12 hours after the current amount. And even then, only if her withdrawal symptoms get too severe. Call us if things take a turn for the worse and we’ll do our best to help.”
“Copy that. I’ll see to her and make sure she gets through this.”
>”Thanks, Anon. And, err, sorry for the way we treated you earlier.”
“No worries, I was a bit stressed out myself and said a bit too much. I’ll call you tomorrow morning and touch base, alright?”
>”Okay, Anon. Have a good night.”
>You say goodbye put the phone away in a bedside table. Turning to Celestia, you gently scratch her head with one hand while the other pulls a pill from your pocket. She’s settled down some. Her breathing a constant in and out. You break the pill in two, returning one to your pocket while you hold the other near the struggling pony.
“Hey, Celestia. How you holding up?”
>”It hurts, Anon…”
“I know, I know. Unfortunately we only have one solution available at the moment. We can’t put you through detox just yet. It’s not safe.”
>>
>>30918930

>Her eyes slowly open, until they see the small white pill in your hand and shoot wide open. She opens her mouth and begins to extend her tongue towards it.
“Remember Celestia, this is just a stop-gap, until we can get you the help we need.”
>She nods and lifts her head. Pain is on her face but her eyes have a laser focus on the item in your hand.
>Your gently grab her jaw and she opens her maw for you. You get a glimpse of the yellow teeth and dirty tongue inside and scold yourself for forgetting about it earlier when you cleaned her. Placing it on the back of her tongue, you withdraw your hand and close her mouth. She instantly gulps and swallows the pill without any assistance.
>Lying back down, the big white horse lets out a sigh of relief and closes her eyes.
>You watch carefully over the next few minutes as her face softens and she unfolds herself from her curled up position. Monitoring her until the shaking stops you slump with exhaustion when she finally stops trembling. Retrieving a glass of water; you wait for her to recover more. After a short while she rises to her hooves. Sitting upright on the bed, she opens her eyes.
“Glad to see you’re back with us in the land of the living.”
>“T-Thank you, Anon.”
“Your welcome, Celestia. How’re you feeling?” You carefully hold out the glass and help her as she greedily gulps the liquid down.
>”Better. Much, much better.”
“I’ll say. But seriously, don’t forget. That pill is a last resort.” She nods and averts her gaze slightly down. She brings up a hoof to her chest before looking you in the eye.
>“I-I understand, Anon. And please believe me, if it didn’t bring me so much pain I would gladly be rid of tha-” She stops mid-sentence as her pupils dilate. “Oh…”
“Celestia?”
>>
>>30918936

>”Ooooohhh...”
>She shudders as a sultry grin spreads on her face. Her jaw goes slack and she hunches her back. Bringing the hoof down, she pushes her front hooves wide on the sheets. The tail that’s tucked under her rear starts flicking back and forth. Nostrils flare with each great intake of air.
>”Ooohhhhhh my...”
>She starts absent mindedly bucking her hips. Long pleasured moans escaping her lips as she begins stimulating herself. A small wet spot has begun to spread on the sheets between her legs. The whole time her eyes are glued to you.
>”Ahhhhhhh. That feels sooooo...”
>In no time at all her tail is soaked and is flicking her liquids at you. A bit of it splashes on your arm; but despite yourself, you’re too absorbed in watching the sight in front of you unfold as Celestia’s actions escalate.
>”OH Fuck!”
>She yells out and steps up her pace. The motions becoming more frantic; more desperate; with each passing moment. Her inner thighs now soaked thoroughly with her own juices. Her tongue rolls out of her mouth and dangles out the side as she get lost in her own ministrations.
>“I can’t! I can’t! I!”
>Her cries intensify as the pony in front of you start pushing herself over the limit. She shuts her eyes tight and her head bounces higher with each spastic buck of her hips. She pleasures herself faster and faster, the slicking sounds of her actions reaching your ears, fueling your own excitement.
>As you think she’s about to reach her peak, her eyes shoot open. In an instant, she’s at your head height. Looking you right in the eyes. Her forelegs grab out at your shoulders to hold on for dear life. You marvel at the look on her face. A delicious combination of anticipation, pleasure, and shock painted on it as she hits her climax.
>>
>>30918941

>”Anoooon, I’m gonnnnaaaaooooOOOOOOOHHHH”
>She shudders hard and dips her head straight down. You hear the splattering sound of her liberally soaking the bed with her fluids. A massive tremor rocking through her body while she loses herself in the moment. Hips bucking wildly as she tries to extract every extra sensation she possibly can from the moment.
>She carries on in a babbling way the whole time, her hooves pulling weekly at your shoulders while she rides the monstrous wave crashing through her body. Finally, after a few moments of frantic movement, she begins to slow. Her body quivering in the afterglow of her actions. Once it seems like she’s finally settled, she slowly brings her face back up to yours. A dopey smile plastered on it.
>”Thankssss ssssooo much, Annnnooonnn.” She bends forward and -- being careful of her horn -- licks the side of your face. You flinch briefly, but soon recover.
“Anytime, big girl.” You blurt out as you run a hand tenderly up and down her back, causing her to shiver slightly.
>She pulls back and smiles stupidly at you.
> Unfortunately, the magic only lasts for a few moments and she looks away to the head of the bed. Letting out a yawn, the large white pony slowly drags herself over to a pillow and collapses on it. A large snore shortly escapes from her, leaving you alone to deal with the aftermath of everything that happened tonight.

>There’s dried vomit, dried mare cum, and the heavy smell of Celestia’s exertions hanging thickly in the air. Most important though, is the large tent in your pants that leaves you wondering about a great many things.
“What the fuck man.”
>You resolve to deal with the results in the morning due to being too tired to give a shit right now. You crawl up next to Celestia and whisper goodnight before turning out the light.
>>
>>30918947

And that part 4 completed. There were a lot of bumps in the road that made this one frustrating to write. Plus its the debut of my first clop scene. I have two questions for the readers, if you'd like to answer.

1. Is the pacing too slow? I myself am fond of writing denser, slower paced stories. But I can up the tempo if people are getting bored.

2. Is the dialogue too cringe? Its really hard to tell when your own stuff doesn't come out as natural when you don't have anyone to soundboard off.

Other than that, please enjoy the update and I'll try to get another out before Sunday next week.

Up to date pastebin with the story so far https://pastebin.com/kqYNQ4b5
>>
>>30918963
> clop scene
So that creepy part after the pill was actually a clop scene?

Pacing is okay if that's your comfortable speed. Better wuality than rushing into writer's block, i myself cannot come up with an update skeleton in less than 5 days.

Dialogs sounded natural, it's almost as i'm at my old apartment with those tho happily married neighbors, lol
>>
Is Steel Steed dead?
>>
>>30918947
You know, if there was such a thing as estrus pills that didn't do... THAT, I'd give my little mare slave them all the time.

Imagine her always having a dripping, burning pussy begging for cock 24/7. Give her a good fingering when she is a good girl and withold when she's naughty. And if you catch her masturbating, you put on a chastity belt.

I have no friends.
>>
>>30918963
yeah>>30919059
all this is pretty much how i felt too. Clop scenes need more heart boner action, not detached and forced.

Absolutely no problems with the pacing. Though if you want to go REALLY slow, It would be nice for larger or more frequent updates.

No really extreme cringe for me, except maybe kinda the "want to see her smile" bit. Him having a definite answer why he spent like 22k on a fucked pony would be nice. and things like anons background, hobbies, job, family and such would net be a bad thing.
>>
>>30918947
>“What the fuck man.”
My sides.
I'm glad he didn't sit there and take the vets shit when she was hurling accusations and threats at him. That shit drives me up the wall when a character is a passive fag over things like that.
>>
>>30919059
>>30920209
It makes sense. More heartfelt, maybe emotional sex scenes would come much later after she's been detoxed. That is if they ever actually get together.
>>
>>30918963
Pacing is on the slow side, but there's no need to rush; it's just a slow story. Dialogue is not at all cringe. That phone three-way conversation worked quite well. Cellys reaction to the drug was pretty cringey, but that was the point.
Overall I can't see anything to criticize, everything is going as it should.
There's a lot of interesting material here. Looking forward to Celly hating herself when she comes down from this, and Anon being tempted during her next episode. The morality is murky here: boning the pone when she wants it like that would not necessarily be bad, if she agrees when she's sober.
>>
>>30917153
>smurfing
she's gonna become an Ultramarine...?
>>
>>30921091
If she thinks armor will save her from learning her lesson she has another thing coming.
>>
>>30914722

Someone was suggesting that Vega's rarity story should be a prequel to staying out of trouble, but it can't be since the horses in homewrecker can't be understood by humans and it can't even be retconned so that there's some sort of invention that allows it because Arnold understands Twilight and apparently there were diplomatic talks when the humans first showed up and twilight probably would have mentioned the translator tech at some point.
Also they work better seperately imho.
>>
>>30921638
he said the two stories aren't related i believe.
>>
File: 1504207619481.gif (133KB, 1080x1080px) Image search: [Google]
1504207619481.gif
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Oh shit, your slave is trying to escape, what will you do?
>>
>>30922260
Shoot them, then make a guard poner fuck the whole and piss in it.
>>
>>30922260
Spank her?
>>
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>>30922294
>>30922323
weak
>>
>>30922260
Looks like she's just hungry. Bring her back in and feed her an apple while stroking her back. Gently lecture her that she can always ask for a snack.
>>
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>>30922260
>>
>>30922359
No, she's trying to escape! You need to put her in a slave box.
>>
>>30920774
>>30920209
>>30919059

Feedback is and always will be greatly appreciated. Thank you very much.

It's a shame the scene at the end didn't hit off that well. I didn't aim for something that Anon or the audience would want too much more of, if any at all. I'll just need to practice more so it doesn't come off as cringe next time.

Based on your reception, do you think a rewrite is in order for that scene at the end? One of the things I hate the most is when a story jumps the shark with a scene and it would kill me if I did that here.
>>
>>30922406
You can't just put all your problems into a slave box.
>>
>>30922323
This is the correct aswer.
>>
>>30922533
I said the clop scene was cringe, but that was the point. Anon is cringing along with us, and Celly will be all the more when she finally recovers. If anything you could make it worse! No need for re-write: full speed ahead! (Well, slow ahead in this case.)
>>
>>30922547
That's why you have more than one slave box.
>>
>>30922533
>rewrite
nah. she's just having a bad time sure it aroused anon but his disgust and pity should the forefront of his emotions.
>>
>>30922260
>Fence crawling
>With wings
>Trying to escape
No: Twi is just messing with us. She knows she has the freedom of our whole property, and if she arranges it beforehand she can wear her tracking collar and fly over the neighbors property too, as long as she doesn't scare the chickens. We playfully give her a boop on the nose, after taking a picture of her cuteness (pic related).
Slavery still sucks, but we make the chains ride as lightly on her as we can, and she does appreciate it.
>>
Saw an image and thought it would be kinda fun to practice editing a bit for spg.
>>
>>30922791
Love the nervous expression, needs ear tag.
>>
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>>30922818
>expression
I didn't do that much here's the original

I'll see what I can do for an ear tag
>>
>>30922791
noice
>>
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>>
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>>30922791
Something else is already planned for the next thread but I'll definitely use it for the one after that.
>>
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>>30923178
Princesses are for a little more than petting.
>>
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>>30923202
I agree.
>>
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>>30923202
>>
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>>30923208
Yes. Slave is for breeding.
>>
>>30923238
Sauce?
>>
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>>
>>30923241
Start with 918253 on Derpi.

The source images are some weird shit with fucking through a portal, but Dash's reaction (and Tavi's lingerie) are top-tier unf.
>>
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SOON
>>
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>>
>>30923248
every time i see those eyes i smile to know that artist likes chrysalis
>>
>>30922818
>ear tag.
>>
New thread: >>30923309
>>
>>30923302
love it.
>>
>>30922791
Add collar.
>>
>>30922791
She seems happy with his new destiny, cut on the ear and spots on its coat indicate initial resistance but the expression on his face showing extreme nervousness and stress, had to be heavily conditioned to submit their defiance actitude
>>
>>30923359
Thread posts: 506
Thread images: 86


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