Anonymous in Equestria Thread #1128

Dudes tripping in Equestria.

>Anon introduces strip poker
>Some ponies start wearing a ridiculous amount of clothes so they can play it with him
>In the middle of summer

>Anon introduces water poker
>A pony ends up drinking herself to death
>That went south quickly

>>30747148
What happened this time

>>30747215
Take a look at the amount of posts in the last thread.

>>30747365
406

>>30747456
Indeed, and the bump limit for a thread lies at 500. Does that teach you something?

>>30747470
no

File: glitchr_1499230712000.jpg (76KB, 861x1024px) Image search: [Google]

76KB, 861x1024px

>>30747470
That I got distracted by the sheer size of the shit I was taking and forgot to bump?

>>30747215
School started.

What retard forgot to watch the thread.

>>30748013
Don't look at me, I was at work.

i'm trying to remember an AiE fic in which the anon is challenged to a "drinking" contest in, I think, a lunar guard bar but possibly appleoosa.
The contest is to see who can consume the most salt before giving up / getting sick, and he's like "this is silly and pointless" the whole time. It was part of a larger fic and years old.
anyone remember such a thing?

>>30748084
Spin the Bottle by Aether

>>30747215
I blame everyone but me.

>>30748410
>90+ pastebins
yikes. it looks like these all take place in the treebrary or somepony's house, though, not a bar
the story as far as i remember also wasn't sexualized, but it's been a while

File: cele.png (1MB, 1361x1594px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1361x1594px

Give me your favorite Celestia focused AIEs, anons.

>>30748485
>it looks like these all take place in the treebrary or somepony's house, though, not a bar
Well, he was one of the first writers in this general, so of course it takes place in the treebrary.
God, I miss that guy, and a lot of other writers too.

File: sad Lyra.png (145KB, 900x805px) Image search: [Google]

145KB, 900x805px

>>30748013
sorry

File: 1499719034760.png (104KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

104KB, 500x500px

>>30748502

>>30748410
>>30748485
well, it seems more and more likely that i won't find it. it's definitely not him, since his don't seem to involve any salt whatsoever. i'm also fairly certain it wasn't greentext

>>30747148
>having to draw somepony when your drawing skills are shit
how would you explain this, when they have been posing for you for 10+ minutes?

>>30749417
"In my latest work I utilized the ultra classical style of my peoples."

Prompt idea: All of the monsters in the Everfree are indifferent or even friendly to Anon unless he's actively pissing them off. He takes advantage of this by getting a pet timberwolf and scaring the townsponies when he takes it on walks.

Bonus points if he names the timberwolf Bark and it acts like a Labrador.

>>30749948
I like this

>>30749948
This was part of Diaries of a Madman, except for the name

>>30749942
>It's uhhh, incredible darling, real good job
... Do you want it, here I insist, you should put it up in your store
>O-oh, I couldn't do that, NOT IN THE STORE... I mean, I know just the place, in my room, ha-haha.

>>30750382
But Anon, that story blows.

>>30747148
If Equestria is really a 2d world, a cartoonist could become famous for drawing photo realistic art.

>>30749346
I recently read an old Celestia CYOA were there was a salt licking challenge that Anon won (of course). Pastebin got nuked but it's available on Anonpone.

Celestia Quest
https://www.anonpone.com/celestia/

>>30745730
Good update Spanky. Thanks!

IRL stuff has been kicking my flank the last couple of days. Sorry I wasn't able to help keep the last thread alive.

>>30751566
>kicking my flank
Use peopleisms, not horseisms. We aren't that flavor of autist around here.

>>30751566
>>30751790
>"Anon, I'm proud of you."
"Why do you say that?"
>"Your use of ponyisms. You're finally starting to adapt to living here and shedding your old life."
"That's not a ponyism. We use that expression too."
>"I've never heard you use it."
"It's very rare."
>"Is it?"
"And...old."
>"Is it really?"
"...no."
>"It's okay, you should be happy. You've come a long way."
"Thanks, I guess. If you don't mind I'm going to go home now."
>You leave and dwell on this new revelation
>Then grab your gun and blowout your brains
>A ceremonious funeral is held by the mane six and you are buried with full honors
>In the back of Applejack's yard
>Alongside two other graves
>"Dagnabit, Twilight, ya just can't leave things well enough alone. Ya gotta say something and bring attention to everything don'tcha?"
>"I didn't mean to. I just wanted to congratulate him."
>"I figured you would have learned your lesson after Anon's 1 and 2."
>"I miss them."
>"It's okay. Summon up another."

File: 1499880590459.jpg (102KB, 632x852px) Image search: [Google]

102KB, 632x852px

Can you guys recommend some feelsy AiE greens?
Preferably featuring Twilight as a central character, but either is fine.

>>30751817

>they just keep summoning Anons

Have faith, brothers. One day you will get your own turn.

>>30751966
Maybe that's why /mlp/ is getting smaller...
All the anons have been summoned to Equestria.

>>30751966
>>30751972
It's true, I was there. When I killed myself I ended up back here. Spoilers: Rainbow Dash smells like a dumpster and a gym locker had a child

Wonder if there's repeats.

>>30752099
I ended up in Detroit

>>30751966
With my luck I'd either end up in the vore fetishists Equestria or the one where they don't have indoor plumbing.

>>30752316
>I ended up in Detroit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g09GtnWdBjc

>>30752938
was that the guy who played lonestar in spaceballs?

>>30753080
Bill Pullman?
No.
TThe actor was actually one of the assistant directors of the movie

>>30750382
>Have an original idea
>Find out someone else already had it and made it shit

I hate when that happens. I might write out a short thingy for it later.

File: 1503078827319.jpg (1MB, 1320x4000px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1320x4000px

I demand a writefag use this as a prompt

>>30753141
Ideas are fair game, especially if someone else's work was subpar.

>>30753155
>go hunting
>instructions not clear, got dick stuck in a deer
Your story about raping an animal is hilarious, but story about raping an intelligent creature would be just edgy.

>>30753432
what if anon didn't know the tiny horses where people???
what if the tiny horses liked it???

>>30753155
>>30753432
Timberwolves ain't people. Try Shukaku's 'To Act A God.'

>>30751932
Guapo off the top of my head.
Pale's stuff too if someone saved them all

>>30751563
That's the one, thanks

>>30754909
My pleasure famalam. It gave me some feels.

>>30753451
The tiny horses have magic.
Now Anon has two problems.

>>30748013
I'm sorry anon. I was sleeping.

>>30753432
He right. Unless Pony rape anon.

Is 4chin running badly lately?

>>30757773
no

>>30757773
summer's ending

>>30751566
Thank you.
I would have posted more but I apparently fell asleep on my floor.

>>30747148

>"Ah if it isn't my favorite human! I hope all is well for you in Manehatten,yes?" A voice behind an old battered desk says.
You shrug and look at those cold blue eyes staring at you. "Couldn't be better,boss. You need something done?"
>The old stallion laughs heartily and looks at his associates. "Look at my boy Anon here! Straight to business! If you mares got even half of his balls then we'd have the whole Equestria eating at our hooves!"
>He then motions you to come closer and lightly taps your cheek with a hoof. "Be my enforcer,Anon. My family needs eager new blood like you. Now, Al here will give you the necessary men. Do not fail me." he says with an icy stare.
You stand rigidly and give the old stallion a thin smile. "You can count on me,boss."
>"Good. Now I have a little job for you. Nothing for someone your caliber." He says as he motions for one of his lieutenants.
>"An old friend of mine owes me a huge deal of money. Unfortunately though, he disappeared without a trace.." You grow uneasy as you hear somepony clear his throat. "Now business is business, yes? I suppose you can just ask his next of kin for the payment."
"Where can I find them?" You say with a tinge of pride in your voice.
>The old stallion leans back in his chair and ponders for a bit.
>"Sweet Apple Acres. In Ponyville."

>>30758048

>"Two hundred and fifty thousand bits. You get twenty five percent as your commission. I handsomely reward those who are loyal to me,you see." He smiles at you, feeling satisfied at his generosity.
"I can catch the next train to Ponyville you want me to start today.." You start to say.
>He just waves you dismissively. "That can wait. For tonight, go celebrate. Get laid. Go jack off or whatever you humans do for fun. Go unwind for the meantime."
>"You are to take the first train bound for ponyville tomorrow. An associate will help you around. I have already sent him a telegram about your arrival. Bring as many men as you need on this job."
You just shrug and decline his proposition. "It's an easy collection job. I think I can manage on my own."
>He contemplates a bit and nods at you slowly.
>"Here. Consider this as your first bonus.A little fun money wouldn't hurt." He laughs jovially as he slides an envelope in front of you.
>"Inside is a numbered account under your name. Bank of Equestria. Twenty thousand bits."
"But boss..I cannot accept such a large amount.." You stammer.
>He just wags his hoof at you. "As I told you awhile ago, I handsomely reward those who are loyal to me."

>>30758050


>"Going up the corporate ladder,eh?" A stallion says as he saunters towards your corner table.
"Hey Al. How's it going?" You inquire as you nurse your drink.
>"Nothing much. Just checking out our employee of the month." He chimes in as he gives you a jab in the arm.
"Heh. Just a little more and it's the big leagues for me." You say as you down your drink.
>He looks at you incredulously and laughs hard."The fuck do you think this is? The girl scouts? You're playing with the big guys now,Anon my boy!"
"So it seems" you chuckle while motioning for the waiter to bring two more mugs of cider.
>"Now I don't want you to take offense but, you're still a bit green and inexperienced and all. But don't you worry since.." He puts his hoof on your shoulder. "..your Uncle Al here would help you out. Show you the ropes. Be the crazy uncle you never had." He adds with a twinkle in his eyes.
You give him a nod. "Thanks man. Real appreciate you looking out for me."
>He just scoffs at your answer and grabs his mug. "Psh nonsense! We are family now,yes? Now, if you have any problems, feel free to approach your Uncle Al."

>>30758051
You hesitate at first then ask him. "Hey Al.."
>He gives you a bored look while drinking up his cider. "Yeap?"
"About the job Boss gave me. Who's the pony that owes him money anyways?" You inquire.
>Al just shakes his head and looks at you fondly. "Anon, one of the things you need to learn is to just shut the fuck up and do the job without too many questions. The less you know, the less chances of you singing like a canary when you get in a tight spot." He concludes.
You just nod bitterly and mentally remind yourself that Al isn't someone to speak openly with.
>He sees the disturbed look in your face so he breaks out a large grin then pats you roughly in the back. "You ought to relax some, son. Just do what you're told and that only. Family relations can only go to a certain point."
A knot forms in your stomach as the seemingly soothing words feel like daggers.
What have you gotten yourself into,Anon?

>>30758055


>Sleep evades you tonight. Not even alcohol helped you settle down. You just sit at the edge of the bed and light up a cigarette.
>The mare sleeping beside you stirs a bit and murmurs something. She then turns around and starts to snore lightly.
>One thing good about alcohol is that it skews the difference between pony and human lady parts. A fuck is still a fuck so hey.
>How did you end up with such a lifestyle? It's not that you were really into the wrong sort of crowd anyways.
>Oh yeah. A big stink on a bar one time. Turns out the pony you had a minor scuffle with has lots of friends high up.
>Next thing you know is that you were in a dead end alley with ponies beating the ever loving shit out of you.
>Boy, there is nothing cutesy about ponies with baseball bats.
>You put up a stiff stand and you certainly gave them a run for their money.
>And then the Boss-man intervenes and gives you as he points out, "an offer too good for you to pass up."
>Work for him or you'll never be able to walk again.
>I like my kneecaps thank you very much good sir.
>You have to admit, whatever moral values you had back then flew out of the window once you acquired the taste for power.
>Not to mention money. Hell you never really run out of that stuff. While back at Earth you'd be lucky if you even had a hundred bucks in your wallet at any given time.
>And all you have to do is to keep shopkeepers and business owners in line. Be there to remind them when to pay up. Rough them up a bit in case they forgot. Lather,rinse and repeat. Easy pie,right?

>>30758058


>And then it hits you that you're a part on what's wrong in this world filled with pastel colored ponies.
>You're none of that romanticized mafiosos you used to see on movies. You're just a glorified thug. No other way to sugarcoat it.
>Your dear mother back at earth would have a heart attack if she knew what you're doing right now.
>Hey mom,how are you? All is well for me here. All I do everyday is to beat stubborn shopkeepers to a bloody pulp.
>You chuckle at the thought of that and rub your eyes tiredly.
>Hey! Why the sudden mulling over this,Anon? It's not like they made you kill somepony.
>They haven't ordered you to whack somepony YET.
>Thank Celestia the usual rough smack in the head is enough to keep ponies in line.
>But if push comes to shove, you do keep a Hi-Power tucked in a shoulder rig.
>No use threatening ponies with it though. Point it at them and they'll just give you a confused look.
>Hell you're sure that you're the only one in Equestria with a gun.
>You force those thoughts away as you look at the bedside clock. Three more hours to go before your train ride.
>You then decide to have another shot of something stiff to knock you out. You'll certainly need every sleep you can get.

>>30758060


>Wake up,Anon. It's your first day of work.
>If you really consider extortion as a decent job then yeah.
>The mare beside you has already left. You make sure she didn't take anything from your room.
>If that bitch stole something then you'll really make her pay.
>The soft knocking on your door gets your attention and you stand up to answer it. With a gun on your left hand, you just open it partially to see who it was.
"You are?" You say as you eye the rather young looking colt.
>He clears his throat and answers in a low voice. "The Boss sent me over to pick you up. He wants to have a word with you in private before you go."
You open the door fully and motion him inside with your gun. "Alright. Come inside. Lemme get some decent clothes first."
>He sits at the sofa while you take a quick shower. You steal glances at him from time to time to see what he's doing.
"I don't think you've told me your name yet,son. You want anything? Coffee? Or maybe something harder?" You inquire.
>"The name's Teddy,sir. And no thanks I'm good. I'm supposed to take care of your commitments here once you start your Ponyville job." He extends his hoof and you shake it.
You nod at him and you give out a chuckle. "Sure is nice to have someone to shout orders at this time."
>He fidgets a bit and informs you that The Boss expects you to arrive as soon as possible.
"Alright. Lead the way, Ted." You say as you show him the door.

>>30758064

"So..just you?" You ask inside the lift.
>He just shakes his head and magically levitates a cigarette to you. "Just me and another pony to watch our six. Then we got another three back at the office."
>Now you got five underlings now huh? Hot damn it's about time you get some appreciation!
>The lift opens at the lobby to reveal another stallion waiting for you.
>He nods at you respectfully and stretches out a hoof. "Mornin' boss. Name's Chip by the way. You good to go? We already got a cab waiting outside."
You shake his hoof and give him a sly grin. "I'm all set. We ought to hurry up if we want to be on the Boss' good side."

>>30758068


>"I hope you are well rested. Come sit and have breakfast with me." He says as he motions you to the chair in front of him.
"Morning Boss. A little more extra sleep would be nice." You chuckle as you sit.
>He looks at you worriedly and pats your hand. " Just take some rest at the train. But for now, eat hearty." He motions others to leave the two of you alone.
"Thanks Boss. I'll finish this job real quick." You assure him.
>"I know you will. Though I wouldn't mind either if you take things more slow. He was a good friend to me and I never forget." He concludes.
You just nod at him. "I'll just make sure that things would go smoothly."
>"The money isn't much of an issue for me. After all, the amount is just mere pocket change." He laughs boisterously.
>"It's just for those old buffoons that tell me not to trust a human so much." He says with a dismissive wave. "This is more of...shall we say, a test, yes? I have faith in you, Anon. Do not let me down."

>>30758071

>"Last call for ponies bound for Ponyville!." The train conductor bellows out.
>Chip helps you out with your luggage and hands you your ticket. "Don't worry about us, boss. We'll make sure everything here runs smoothly." He assures you.
"I'm sure you guys will. Just talk to Al if you encounter any problems." You say as you take your ticket.
>You give the two a nod before you enter your cabin. You stow your luggage overhead then try to make yourself comfortable.
>Hell yeah time for some extra shuteye.
" ..."
>" E-excuse me sir.." A pony says in a low voice.
>You look up to see a familiar looking stallion in front of you. You certainly have seen the pony but his name eludes you.
"Eyyyyyy Sterling, my friend! Forgot your name there a bit." You say apologetically. Good 'ol Sterling Silver. He's one of the shopkeepers under your protection. Never does miss a payment nor gives you any headache.
>"N-nah s'okay Anon sir.." He stammers a bit.
"C'mon man, drop the whole 'sir' thing alright?" You say as you give him a huge grin. "After all, you're one of my best customers anyways."
>Sterling looks very much relieved to hear that. "I try hard not to give you any problems so we can both be happy."
You chuckle at that and pat his back. "Ain't that the truth,pal!"
>The train starts to pull out of the station and you can feel it pick up speed. You sit back and rub your eyes tiredly while Sterling looks at you expectantly.

>>30758076
>"Listen,Anonymous.." He begins. "I have a small problem and I'd be very much be grateful if you can lend me a hoof."
You lean forward and look at him intently. "Go on. I'm listening."
>"I have a nephew in Ponyville that had a bit of a scuffle with the wrong sort of ponies.."
"And you're worried about his safety?" You inquire.
>He nods slowly and shakes his head. "He's a bit of a scoundrel but his heart is in the right place. My sister would be heart broken if something happens to her son." He concludes bitterly.
You just raise your hand and give him a smile. "Worry no more. Once I make contact with my associate, We shall iron out this problem."

>>30758080


>The train ride was pleasant enough. If only Sterling stopped thanking you and now he's yapping about his business plans.
>So much for that sleep you were looking forward to.
>You can feel the train slow down as it arrives at the train station. You stretch your legs a bit before disembarking your carriage.
>Damn you forgot to ask the name of the pony you were supposed to meet up with.
>You scan the crowd in hopes to find him. Aside from the usual groups of families waiting for somepony to arrive, you spot a solitary stallion smoking a cigarette while leaning at a post. You take your chances and ask if he's the one to meet you up.
>The stallion looks at you and smiles a bit. "How did you know it was me?"
You shrug as you extend your hand. "Lucky guess I suppose."
>He shakes your hand then pats your back. "I'm Bugsy by the way. Come along, my house is just a short walk from here."
>"You'll love it here. Not as big as Manehatten plus folks here are way friendlier than the lot back at Manehatten. Everything's pretty laid back too." He says as he leads you towards a cobbled path.

>>30758084
"My purpose of visit isn't for pleasure you know. Just got some errands to do then it's back to Manehatten for me."
>He just chuckles at your reply as the two of you turn to a narrower road. "Figured you were the straight to business kind of guy. But news travels fast around here. Expect to be a minor celebrity of sorts." He adds with a hearty laugh.
>Now that part you didn't like. You wanted this job to be low key. Get in, do the job then get out.
>So much for trying to be discreet.
>Well for starters, you did stick out like a sore thumb in a crowd. Most ponies were just about shoulder length for you.
>Being the only human in Equestria has it's perks especially at your line of work. Ponies view you with the mixture of fascination and distrust
>Not to mention fear. Oh boy did they get all nervous whenever you pay their stalls a visit.

>"Looks like we're here already." He says as he stops in front of a fairly modest sized house. "Make yourself at home,pal. What's mine is all yours."
"Thanks. Hey, mind if I use the shower? I need to freshen up a bit." You say as you set place your bag at the side of the sofa.
>"Sure go ahead. Now I gotta go back at the bar. I'm a bit busy today so.." He gives you a key. "Might be a good idea if you walk around a bit later. Getting cooped up inside would bore you out."
"Would do that. See you later then?"
>"Yeah,sure. Just drop by at the bar next door if you need something." And he closes the door.

>>30758090
>The quick shower did wonders to your tired and aching body. After stowing your things in a drawer, you grab a small pouch containing a few bits and you slip on your shoulder holster rig. Time for a little walk around to get your bearings.
>Ponies stopped whatever they were doing as you pass them by. You can feel them staring at you.
>Minor celebrity my ass. They're really making you feel uncomfortable.
>Damn you should've just brought a pony or two to do all the muscle job as you pull the strings behind the scenes.
>You were about to head back when a pony runs toward you.
>"Anonymous The Human! Oh wow! I thought you fell off the face of Equestria! Where have you been all this time?" The purple mare inquires.
"I've been doing you know...stuff." You say nonchalantly. What was her name again?
>She just puffs her cheeks and looks at you crossly. "You made a promise back then that you'll answer all my questions but you never came back."
"Well er..sorry about that. But I'm already here so I suppose I can still make good of my promise." You add with a grin.
>She just smiles at you and pushes you towards another street. "That can wait until later. My friends would be delighted to meet you!"

----------
Any interesting ideas? Am in two week long vacation so I figured I'd just pick up my writing again.

https://pastebin.com/u/Sicarii

>>30757773
Looks like my modem was being retarded

File: Bee_Aitch_Pee.jpg (1MB, 3756x2504px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 3756x2504px

>>30758060
>But if push comes to shove, you do keep a Hi-Power tucked in a shoulder rig.

He's a thug, but a thug with exquisite taste in tools.

we /k/ nao

>>30758094
Like it so far dude, curious to see where it goes.

>Anon believes that there is glory in death
>So he constantly tries to be a hero and kill himself by facing an army or an ancient evil alone
>He never gets the death he desires though, because the ponies always interfere in some way

>>30745730
I promise a more thorough analysis so here's something:
Try to avoid starting too many lines with "you," the worst you did in that update was 2 lines starting with it in a row, one without and then 3 with, making it 5 out of 6 in one spot.
You forgot to capitalize Derpy on the first line.
Some of your dialogue blocks are too long, I wouldn't have more than three lines of dialogue in a row. You can use a line of description, for example, to break them up.
Don't have Anon talk to himself. Describe his thoughts instead.

I think that's enough for now. Keep writing, you have potential.

>>30759087
gimme a few more minutes

>>30758094


"Well, lead the way," giving Twilight a warm smile.
>"Let's start off with Rarity. Her boutique is just around the corner," Twilight explains.
>"Anyways, what brings you to Ponyville,Anon?" She inquires.
"Figured I need a little rest time I suppose," you say with a chuckle.
>"Do you have a place to stay already? I have a spare room if you like"
"Me? Yeah. Staying with an associate," You explain. "Thanks for the offer, though."
>She nods and trots along your side until you reach a rather curious looking building. It does look like a mini circus tent of sorts.
>"Rarity? Are you there?" Twilight calls as she lightly raps the door.
>"Twilight?" A little filly on a window asks.
>The two of you look up to see a white filly with a curly violet hair. She disappears and soon you hear heavy thuds as she runs for the door.
>"Hey Sweetie Belle!" Twilight beams. "Is your sister home?"
>The little filly shakes her head no. "She just left a few minutes ago. Something about having some stuff shipped to Manehatten I think. She told me she managed to sell like...a bajillion of those dresses to some pony running a store there!"
>So that's why her name sounds familiar.
>Twilight's ears droop and she looks at you sadly. "Oh. I was about to introduce Anon to her," She trails off.
>By now Sweetie took notice of you and scooted closer. The curious look on her face finally gives way for a big smile.
>"Hi! I'm Sweetie Belle," she offers a hoof to you.
"Heya. Name's Anon," you crouch at her height and shake her hoof. "Pleasure to meet ya."
"Tell your sister I said hi,okay?" You add while riffling her mane.
>She giggles and nods enthusiastically. "Okay! But I need to introduce you to my friends too. Have you met Scootaloo and Applebloom already?"
>You shake your head no. "Not yet I'm afraid. Maybe some other time?"

>>30761284


>" . . ."
>"Well, we can still meet Pinkie if you like," Twilight offers. "And maybe we can grab something to eat too!"
"That I can get behind. Great timing since I haven't eaten since before boarding the train," You smile as she pushes your back. The mention of food really made your stomach grumble.
>"Then you'll love Sugarcube Corner! They got the meanest baked treats in town!"
You chuckle as you pick up the pace to keep up with her. "I'm good as sold. Your treat?"
>"Of course! Everything for my most favorite human!"
"Huh. As far as I can remember, I AM the only human here." You laugh with her.
>"Here we are. The best bakeshop in town!" She proudly says as she motions for another quirky looking shop. You were used to grey and drab shops back in Manehatten.
>From here you can already smell the delicious scent of cinnamon wafting from inside. Goddamn did your mouth water.

>>30761300

"Welcome to Sugarcube Corner," a mare beams and gives you a warm smile. "Can I help you.....sir? Oh,Hi Twilight! Is he your friend?"
>"Good afternoon to you too, Mrs. Cake." Twilight greets her with the same gusto. "Anonymous, Mrs. Cake."
"It's nice to meet you, Ma'am" You say as you offer a hand.
>She shakes it and ushers the two of you to a table.
>"I assume you're here for Pinkie?"
"...And maybe some of those cinnamon buns too?" you add hopefully.
>Mrs.Cake laughs at that and then lightly pats your hand. "I just finished baking a batch. I'd be more than happy to give you some as a welcome gift!"
>"As for Pinkie, I had her run and errand, unfortunately," Mrs. Cake explains. "But she left something for this kind of occasion."
>Mrs. Cake reaches below the register and gives you a small box. On the side was a ratchet key with a note stuck to it.
"Wind me," You mutter as you read the paper.
>You barely touch the key when the box lid swings open then a shower of confetti fills the room and a record player CLEARLY too large for the box pops out.

>>30761315
>"IF YOU'RE LISTENING TO THIS THEN IT JUST MEANS ONE THING....." The recorder starts.
>"A NEW PONY IS IN TOWN AND I NEED TO MEET THEM ASAP!" It goes on enthusiastically. "But unfortunately, I'm away running an errand.."
>"BUT NO MATTER! I'LL THROW YOU THE BESTEST WELCOME PARTY ONCE I GET PACK. PINKIE PROMISE!"
>"And OH! Please check the bottom of the box for your very first welcome cupcake!"
>The recorder then stops and springs out. And as the recording has promised, a single pink cupcake was indeed at the very bottom of it.
"Well would you look at that," You chuckle as you look at the cupcake.
>"OMIGOSH I TOTALLY FORGOT!" Twilight suddenly blurts out. You were taken aback and almost dropped the cupcake.
>"Anon I'm really really sorry but I need to get back at the library ASAP," She explains.
>You just shrug and take a bite at your cupcake.
"No worries. I can just drop by at the library or some other time if you want," You assure her.
"And besides, I can handle my own anyways. Already bought a map of Ponyville so I'm set."
>"Are you sure you're okay?"
You offer her a smile and ruffle her mane. "No worries, okay? See you later, Twi."
>She zooms out, leaving you and your cupcake alone.
>"Anon? Where's Twilight?" Mrs. Cake asks while he places another box at your table.
"She said she has to go back to the library to do something."
>"I see. In that case, take this buns with you," She gives you that warm smile again. "I hope to see you again!"

>>30761325


>After thanking Mrs. Cake, You head out again to check what Ponyville has to offer.
>Turns out almost everypony wanted to talk with you and gave you some of whatever they were selling or carrying.
>You can't possibly carry them all so you ended up giving some to a bunch of fillies you passed by
>It was already quite dark when you've decided to head back home
>This town really transforms after hours. From the bubbly and cheery mood during daylight turns rather unnerving at night.
>You were already halfway home when you hear a commotion coming from an alley


>"Come on, mang. A deal's a deal. Miss a payment, we get some quality funtime with you," a rough looking pony sneers.
>"I'll come up with the money next week, I swear! Just give me more time!" The kneeling pony pleads.
>"Time's over, bub! Now we make you squeal like a little piggy! Reeeeeeeee!" Another pony holding a baseball bat muses.
>"You! Mister! Please help me!" He shouts when he sees you at the end of the alley.
>The two thugs look at you menacingly. "What the fuck are you looking at, you fucking monkey? Get the fuck outta here!"
You just raise your arms and back away slowly. "Hey man, Sure. Jus' an innocent bystander."
>"Yeah that's right! Nothing to see here,pal." The pony with a baseball bat adds.
>"Hey! Wait! Please help me!"

>>30761343


>"Sorry sir, but the store is already closed. Just come back tomorrow, will you?" The stallion behind the counter says.
"I'd hate to bother you but," the commotion just beside the shop gets both your attention. "I kinda need it now," you add while motioning for the commotion outside.
>The stallion realizes what it's for and clucks. "For a little 'mergency,huh? Whaddaya need?"
"A crowbar if you have one,please."
>He smiles and takes one from the wall. "Now, that's a spare one we got here so...it's on the house," he adds with a grin.
>"Git those bastards real good,yeah? That pretty troublesome duo wouldn't be missed anyways."

"Excuse me sir," you say as you tap the thug pony lightly in the shoulder with the crowbar.
>"What the fu-." You cut him off with a backhand swing that connects with his face.
>The guy staggers sideways and falls at a pile of garbage.
>The other thug holding the pony shoves his victim aside and magically levitates a knife but steps back a bit.
"Heeeeey man, where are you going? Not up for a little fun?" You ask.
>"I don't know what you are or what your problem is but..take one more step closer and I'll slit your throat!" He stutters as he waves his knife at your face.
"With what, that piddly-ass cheap punk knife of yours? Get the fuck outta here before I carve your head up."
>He wavers a bit but drops his knife. He then breaks into a sprint while shouting profanities at you.

>>30761357


"You okay buddy?" You offer a hand at the still dazed stallion.
>He rubs his snout and shakes his head a bit. He finally reaches out and grabs your hand.
>"I-I..thank you sir," She stutters as he shakes your hand quite vigorously. "How can I ever repay you?"
>Bingo
"What's your name, son? And those ponies are?" you jab a finger at a still knocked out stallion.
>"Bits. Silver bits." He straightens up and arranges his tie. "I run a small trading outpost just outside the town."
>"Those ponies were...you can say ask for money for 'protection'," he says delicately. "They've told me they're doubling my fee and there's no way I can afford it so this happened."
>You chuckle as you give him a pat on the back.
"Just stick to me, pal. I got your back." You assure him
>His eyes go wide and he's starting to smile. "Really? Fantastic! I must insist that we come back to my office for a little chat."
>You shake your head no as you lean the crowbar at the side of the building.
"You know Bugsy?"
>He ponders a bit. "The guy that runs that tavern?"
"Yeah that guy. Just drop by sometime and we'll talk there.As for now, might be a good idea for you to skedaddle already," you offer.
>He nods enthusiastically and grabs your hands again. "I thank you again for that little favor you did to me. I'll make this very much worthwhile for you," he promises.

>>30761371

-----------
"Heya Bugsy," you say while taking a seat on one of the barstools.
>"Watcha having,bud? Good thing you swung by," he explains as he slides a rolled paper at you. "You got a telegram."
"Something light," you mutter while you unravel the message.
>Bugsy slides a mug of cider at you and watch in mute interest as you read the scroll.
>Al coming over? This is interesting.
"Heya Bugsy, you got some more spare rooms?
>Bugsy arches an eyebrow at you. "More guests?"
"Didn't tell me why though. Looks like I'm heading out tonight. His train is supposed to arrive later before midnight."
>"Ya need me to wait up for you guys?" He asks as he takes your now empty mug.
>You shake your head no as you stand up. You take out your Browning and make sure you got a round in the chamber.
>"You be careful, Anon." Bugsy offers as you head out. "I'll have the rooms ready by the time you arrive."
"Will do. Don't wait up. Go get some rest, pal," you offer him.

>"Afraid tonight's train would be a bit late," The station manager explains. "Lost some pressure en route to Fillydelphia."
>You grunt in resignation and lean on a column.
"How long?"
>"An hour or so, give or take." the mare says apologetically. "Would you like to step inside the office? I got some coffee brewing."
"Thanks for the offer. I'll just wait here."
>She shrugs as she goes back inside. "It's pretty chilly out here. Just tap at my window if you wanna go inside,okay?"
" . . ."

>>30761387
>You stuff your hands inside your jacket and slump at your seat. The wind's picking up and that offer sounds about tempting now.
>You decide against it and wait it out on the platform instead.
>Barely an hour has passed when you hear the faint sound of an engine at the distance. Finally!
>It takes a few more minutes till the train finally comes to a halt. You notice that there's little or no passengers on this train.
>Then you realize a few Royal Guard troopers are forming up behind you.
>Slowly you feel a ball of ice form in your stomach. Royal Guards were never good news.
>Your hand was subconsciously reaching for your gun when Al suddenly pats your back. You turn and see a familiar face flanked by your two associates Ted and Chip
>Al laughs boisterously as he takes notice on your uneasiness towards the Royal Guards. Chip and Ted just gives you nods of respect.
>"Easy there, Anon. They're our friends," he motions at the Guards.
>He looks at the more senior looking guard. "Now what?"
>The pony clears his throat and stands at attention. "The Captain sends his regards and has sent a carriage to pick you up. We'll be departing shortly."
>"Marvelous! Make sure all our stuff is well accounted for," Al says the group walks toward the exit.
>The senior officer nods and whistles for a Guardsman to handle it. He then leads you to a waiting carriage.

>>30761395

"So...?"
>Al looks at you quizzically. "So?"
You look at him confused and open your arms. "Mind filling me in?"
>He laughs heartily and slaps your knee. "It's a secret," he says with a twinkle in his eye.
"Wow. We going on a fuckin' slumber party or something?" you ask,dripping with sarcasm.
>Al laughs harder and now Ted's arm takes the brunt of his slaps.
>"You'll see. I wouldn't want to spoil the surprise for you. This is big, Anon."
You slump at your seat and cross your arms. "Fine. This has to do anything with my job?"
>Al Shakes his head and levitates a cigar his mouth. Ted then flips open a lighter for him.
>"That takes the back seat for now," he explains in between puffs. "Boss says this one gets top priority."
"This important,huh?" Interesting.

>The carriage leads you at the edge of the town just by the Everfree forest. You can faintly see the outline of a fort and the carriage abruptly stops.
>"Well, looks like we're here. I hope they haven't started the slumber party yet!" Al jabs at you.
>You just laugh it off as the four of you exit the wagon. It's a fairly small fort-no...looks more like an outpost.
>But it seems that security in this outpost is tight. You can see a dozen or so Guardsmen in pairs patrolling about.
>From the outpost entrance, A solitary stallion emerges. He looks at you momentarily then trots towards Al.
>"Are you the ones sent by Lucky Strike?" He inquires.
>"The Boss,you mean? Yeah we're it." Al extends a hoof. "You must be the Captain."
>The Captain looks at Al's hoof for a moment then finally takes it. "Please come inside."

------------------------
https://pastebin.com/ep5hKseg

Would finish the next parts most prolly by tomorrow. Got a nice storyline mixed up for it so yeah.

>>30761409
I'm interested so far.

>>30758606
>Not a glawk fowdee problem solver
aka, high point

File: Birdman_nytesytes.jpg (156KB, 810x1022px) Image search: [Google]

156KB, 810x1022px

>>30763228

Princes Luna
>”...so, to summarize: The creature, who we have decided to call Anonymous for the time being, has not displayed any sings of violence towards anypony despite the size difference and the fact that he is partially carnivorous. We have discovered a way to talk to him, and that he is at least as intelligent as any one of us. There is, however, reason to believe that not all of his kind are as benevolent as he is, and we have decided to do everything we can to prevent any more of his kind from gaining access to Equestria.”
>Your sister's word echoed in the hall, the only other sound being the scribbling of press ponies' pens as they took notes.
>”Yes, go ahead.”
>She pointed towards one of the reporters who had their hoof in the air.
>You rolled your eyes and said goodbye to your hopes of the 'brief press conference' you had agreed to have with her and Twilight.
>”Why is Anonymous not here himself?”
>”I believe Twilight knows the answer to this one. Would you?”
>Celestia looked at Twilight, sitting behind her from your perspective, and nodded.
>”He, uh...”
>Twilight stammered, thrown off by suddenly being cast in the spotlight.
“I asked if he wanted to come a bit before we began, but he said he dislikes reporters for personal reasons and declined.”
>Her recovery was immediate, though, and she even managed to sound casual.
>It reminded you of the time you spent with her in this room after her ascension, with her sitting where she was now and you playing the press and trying to come up with the most difficult and least expected questions you could.

>>30763955
>She had been, as your sister had told she was, a fast learner.
>”Okay, we only have time for one more question.”
>You jerked in surprise as you heard the line you were hoping for, but not expecting in the least.
>The reporters' prattle filled the room as your sister threw you a sideways glance and flashed a smile.
>”There's something you should know about him that we didn't have time to tell about before this.”
>Her voice was just barely loud enough for you to hear.
>You were briefed on what Twilight had found out before the conference, but they had practically dragged you there straight out of bed, so it was understandable if there was something else.

“There was something you wanted to tell me?”
>You were in Celestia's room, where she had requested you and Twilight to come after the conference.
>”Yes. After Twilight talked to Anonymous today, she asked for a sample of his blood. He agreed to give one.”
>Your sister's horn lit up, the drawer under her desk opened and a small, sealed glass vial of dark red liquid, coated in her magical aura, floated out of it.
>She made it float over to Twilight, who then took it into her magical grasp.
>”I ran a few tests on it and...”
>Twilight continued from where your sister had left off, a serious expression on her face.
>”I'm... I'm not sure. It seems like it's... well, you should see it for yourself.”
>The vial floated over to you, and you intensely stared at it for a second but couldn't see anything out of the ordinary.
“Am I... missing something?”
>Looking at the other alicorns, you felt a little dumb for not realizing what was so special about the blood.
>”Try levitating it yourself and you'll see.”
>You raised an eyebrow at Twilight, skeptical about it, but focused your magic and grasped the vial with it.
“What-”

>>30763965
>It hit you.
>Hard.
>It was like an explosion of raw magic going off inside you, starting from your horn and rapidly flooding your veins with pure, glowing power.
>It felt as if your body was filled with molten steel, and you opened your mouth to scream.
>But, as suddenly as it began, it ended.
>All that was left was a feeling of raw magic coursing through your veins, empowering your spell thousandfold.
>You nearly crushed the vial before being able to adjust to the sudden surge of energy.
“What?”
>It was all you could say.
>You were at a loss for thoughts, much of your attention focused on simply containing the magic.
>”At first it seemed like he did not react to Equestria's ambient magic at all, but it seems like that is not the case: his body is absorbing enormous amounts of it instead.”
>You barely listened to Twilight's words, still trying to prevent accidental outbursts.
>The power was slowly settling down to a more manageable form, though.
“But- He- Whe- Does he know?”
>”We don't think he's aware of this, and are certain that he can't tap into it himself as he lacks a horn or anything else that could act as a focus.”
>You felt your sister's magic tug at the vial and let go of it
>The ludicrous amount of power rapidly drained away, leaving you feeling like your own, as strong as it was, magic was but an insignificant speck.

>>30763974
“How did you pick it up like you did? I was completely overwhelmed and it seemed like you weren't affected at all.”
>Twilight and Celestia glanced at each other as you asked your question.
>”Preventing it from happening is quite easy, you just have to use a basic deflection spell around the vial. Even a very weak one will do, one that can't even be seen.”
>You threw Twilight a skeptical look before focusing on the vial, now resting on your sister's table, and did as she had suggested.
>...Nothing.
>Just as she said, the deflection spell completely blocked the surge.
>”For now, we are the only ones who know of this. I am going to tell Cadence as soon as I can, but I would ask you to not discuss this with anyone. We have not tested what it would do to unicorns, or pegasi or earth ponies. But, more importantly, there are some individuals who would be more than willing to harm Anonymous to gain access to such power.”
>Your sister gave you an imperative look, one she normally reserved for ordering her guards.
>”I will do everything I can to make sure they never get to do that. I would ask you to do the same.”
“I will.”
>You knew well enough to not argue with her on such an issue.
“But does that mean he will be kept locked up in that tiny room until...”
>Trailing off, you dared not say what you thought of: until his death.
>”No, I don't think letting him out would be an issue as long as this remains a secret... What do you think, Twilight?”
>”Huh? Sorry, what?”

>>30763981
>Twilight had had an absent look on her face, and now looked at your sister with a hint of red on her face as Celestia repeated what you had said.
>”No, I don't think that'd be an issue as long as there's someone around to make sure he doesn't get into trouble... But I just remembered that there's something important I have to take care of in Ponyville.”
>”I think we're done here, unless...”
>Your sister looked at you, one eyebrow cocked.
“I do not have anything to add.”
>”Okay, see you tomorrow!”
>She trotted to the balcony, spread her wings and leaped off, leaving you wondering what could have been important enough to make her leave out of the blue like that.

>>30763955
Forgot a
>
there, that's Twilight's line, not Luna's.

pastebin: https://pastebin.com/5m1dnQZ0

There's a few things about this story I'm not completely certain are good, but you brown-nosed bastards haven't given me anything to work off of so I've just went with what I feel is best. I need opinions damn it. Help me make this a better story.

>>30763738
kek

>>30764008
I feel you Anon. Unfortunately I don't think I'm qualified to give critique, as my standards are relatively low since I don't have the eye (or the intellect) to weed out most imperfections.
Just know this: if something was really, REALLY wrong with your writing, someone would've told you by now. Keep it up, I'm still reading.

>>30764008
>Help me make this a better story.

>>30763955
should say "signs of violence" not "sings of violence"

You're welcome.

Remember to train your house pony to always swallow.
Moneyshots are for workhorses.

>>30766451
He always does.

>>30764008
Not having the entire paste set as private would help. We can't compare shit otherwise.

I want to update Blissful Bites soon but I'm at a impasse. Should I keep the green a happy equestria centered piece or should the group go into strange waifu territory and go ruin spelunking?

>>30766941
It's your green, not ours. You do you.

>>30732206
>With the two of you bent to this task it takes mere minutes to sort through the entirety of the pile.
>With one last cursory inspection you estimate that you likely have enough teeth to fill a chain with a handful to spare.
>You scrape those that you've sorted from the dresser and into a bag for transport, tying it off on your belt.
>You maglock your chainsword to your hip doing likewise with your helm.
>Best to avoid frightening any more of the guard with the glow of your eyes.
>It was dim enough to go unnoticed in direct sunlight but even well lit as it is the castle has its share of shadowed hallways.
>Now you simply need to secure permission from the Princess to fund this newest repair.
>Luna has thus far been your been your patron but you doubt that she will rise for several hours yet.
>Celestia has been generous enough during your stay that you see no harm in asking her.
>Your course of action decided you set off for the throne room, Stormy in tow.
>"So why do you need two swords anyway? Princess Luna already gave you that magic one."
"One should always have a second weapon in the event that they are disarmed. Besides that a fine sword though it is Luna's blade is a bit small for my size."
>"Makes sense. It was pretty cool that she gave you a replacement though."
>You nod your agreement. It was very generous of her to replace your damaged power sword.
>Still you will be more comfortable with something sized for you in hand.
>You reach the Throne room doors and the guards allow you through as usual.
>The Princess is seated on her throne a scroll levitating before her as she reads through it.
>Her brow furrows as she reads her expression betraying some small amount of concern.
"Forgive my intrusion Princess, have I interrupted something?"
>The Princess turns her attention to you, her expression softening. "No, I was just going over a few reports from the Crystal Empire."

>>30767064
>The Princess shifts in her seat letting the scroll curl in on itself as she sets it aside.
>"Citizens in the Empire have been reporting seeing strange things at night."
"What manner of strange things?"
>"Most of the reports are of shadowy figures but nopony has gotten a good look at anything."
>Stormy who has been more or less hidden in your shadow speaks up. "It's not the changelings again is it?"
>Celestia offers Stormy a reassuring smile.
>"While we can't rule out the possibility there haven't any reports of attempted abductions."
>"Cadence and Shining armor are taking all the necessary precautions. Now, what is it I can help you with?"
>You unlock the chainsword from your belt and hold it out in front of you flat across the palms of your hands for the Princess to see.
"This was salvaged from the wreckage of my ship."
>Once Celestia has had a chance to look you lock the sword back in place thinking it best not to be waving a weapon around in the throne room.
>Even if that weapon happens to currently be useless as anything more than a cudgel.
"I believe I have found the means to repair it but I would require the services of a smith once more and wished to seek your permission."
>"If I recall the last repairs weren't too expensive. So I don't see any reason why not."
>"Though I will have to speak with Luna about what sort of stipend you'll be receiving when she has you take your oaths."
>You give a shallow bow crossing your fist across your armors plastron.
"My thanks Princess but if I will be staying in the castle barracks the stipend is unnecessary."
>Celestia blinks in surprise and from the corner of your eye you can see Stormy giving you a sideways look.
>"Are you certain Anon>? The guards customarily receive a weekly stipend to help cover living expenses and you would be entitled to the same."
"You have been generous enough to provide repair to my armor and weapons, and the castle staff have provided everything else I have needed."

>>30767071
>You give a shrug the expression made exaggerated by the heavy pauldrons of your armor.
"I cannot think of anything else I might want for."
>"Well if you're sure."The Princess says uncertainty. "If you change your mind later we can discuss it then."
"As you say Princess. Farewell for now."
>You turn to leave Stormy quickly bowing before trotting quickly after you to catch up.
>Once you've entered the hallways and are out of earshot of the guards Stormy whispers harshly.
>"Are you crazy, you sign up for a dangerous job and then don't even want payed for it?"
"It was never customary for any Knight of the Order to receive payment for his service. Besides, it's not as if you do your duty for payment is it?"
>"Well that's not why I joined no." Stormy says.
>"I didn't tell them I'd do it for free either though." She mutters before letting the subject drop.
>Having secured Permission from Celestia like you had hoped you make your way out in to Canterlot once more.
>Stormy is clearly eager to get whatever activity she has planned for the two of you underway but remains silent on the matter as you head for the smith.
>Much as before you find her at the forge beneath the shed. "Back so soon? I was sure we'd gotten the measurements right."
"The pieces were without flaw. I have simply come to make another request."
>You lay the heavy chainsword across a table not currently in use and take out the bag of dragon teeth pouring a few out for viewing.
"I require these fitted to a sturdy chain. It must be able to endure heat and stress and should sit between these guide rails."
>She leans in close inspecting the chainsword, testing the gap between the guide rails with the tip of a hoof.
>"I'm gonna need more specific instructions, but I think we can manage it." She says at length.
>You give her such details as you are able, spacing of the teeth, the direction in which they should be mounted, types of materials that might be used.

>>30767078
"I will be entrusting the sword to you to work with. Have a care around the activation rune. It will set the chain to spinning if mounted."
>The smith nods at your warning. "I'm a little surprised you're leaving it here after the way you kept your armor."
"My armor was damaged but in a usable state. The sword is not. If you require more teeth inform me."
>You turn and depart, with your errand finally complete you let Stormy guide you.
>"Finally, now I can show you one of my favorite places to eat."
>You fail to see what was wrong with the fare provided by the castle but you've eaten tree bark before so perhaps your basis for comparison is skewed.
>You wind your way through the alleys between the larger shops and pass beneath the shadows of the more well appointed buildings that dominate the main streets.
>"There it is." Stormy says grinning as she indicates a small shop nestled between two other buildings built near side of the mountain.
>The sign indicates that it is a sandwich shop.
>Given the other restaurants you've seen in Canterlot you expected something more ostentatious.
>"This place is great. They have the best food and if we get seats on the roof we can watch the airships."
"Airships?"
>Stormy who is already trotting happily towards the door replies over her shoulder. "Yeah, you know the..oh right you've probably never seen one."
>She holds the door open gesturing for you to hurry along. "You'll see once we get on the roof."
>You duck your head slightly to clear the threshold of the door turning to make certain you don't break the frame with your shoulder.
>Stormy speaks with one of the staff regarding seating and the two of you are ushered upstairs out on to an open air patio.
>Though you were aware of the concept you've never actually been to a restaurant outside of the ones in Equestria.
>Being largely ignorant of the options available you allow Stormy to order for you. Though you do stipulate no hay.

>>30767083
That's all for the day. Thanks for all the comments and feedback, sorry I didn't get to reply to a few in the last thread before it got archived.
Looking like updates are gonna be mostly confined to weekends for now because of work.
The bad news is hours are longer than ever due to a shortage of people, the good news is I've been there so much longer than everyone else I get the better jobs.
I'll aim to have another update up monday night when I get home after the eclipse.
I've also taken a personal day for Tuesday just to write and paint some models, so the next couple of updates should be more action.
Here's the updated pastebin https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe

>>30766902
It's not private, it's unlisted. What'd you compare it to, anyways? It's the only paste that account has.

>>30765804
I asked for opinions, not necessarily critique.

>>30767106
Fantastic as always, looking forward to seeing where the story is going.

>>30767106
Oh boy
>"Most of the reports are of shadowy figures but nopony has gotten a good look at anything"
RIP peacetime in equestria(?)

Has anyone seen that faggot Zew around? I know he said he was gonna start being busy, but I figured he'd stop in at some point

>>30761409

>The Captain leads you inside and stops in front of a bookshelf. And with a tap, it rises up a little then slides aside.
>"We use this safehouse when the Guardsmen needs to talk of matters that Princess Celestia needs not to hear," The Captain explains as he motions for the group to follow him below.
>Al just clucks and whistles as he takes the first step down. "Magic-proofed?"
>The Guardsman nods. "The whole perimeter has a magic barrier but the room below has it's own for...insurance."
>This time you got warning bells chiming inside your head. You let The Captain walk a bit more and lightly grab Al by the collar.
"Sweet Jesus," You whisper harshly. "Al don't tell me we're gonna help them stage a coup against Celestia."
>Being a member of a crime family is an already guaranteed reason for them to put you behind bars. Getting caught inciting a rebellion is worse and makes you lose your head.
>Al just scoffs and laughs at your remark. "Stop reading too much of those fantasy books. You'll find out soon enough."
>At the foot of the stairs was a large barred door in which The Captain pushes to reveal the room inside.
>It was quite a large room. There were four Guardsmen standing by the sides of the room while a large oaken table occupies the middle.

>>30768558

>There were already others seated and you're familiar with some of them
>Al whistles and leans at you to whisper. "Rosy Thorn from Fillydephia. Screech from Griffonstone. Dodge from Appleloosa," he names out.
>"And even Straight Flush from Las Pegasus is here. Looks like this really is a big operation."
"All bigshots,eh?" You inquire as Al and you take a seat. Ted and Chip had to stay outside.
>Al grins at you. "No small fish here, that's for sure."
>The others acknowledge your presence and nods at you.
>The Captain clears his throat and takes his place in front of a large map of Equestria.
>"Gentlecolts and griffons, allow me to express my gratitude on partaking on our invitation," he starts. "I hope we can put our differences aside for the meantime to work on a common goal."
>"Now, I must apologize on the amount of secrecy and security you had to go through as this is a highly sensitive matter. Princess Celestia or anypony must certainly not know about the particulars of this meeting. Do I make myself clear?" The Captain warns.
>The group grunts in approval as the Guardsman motions toward the map.
>"As you know, there has been a surge on interest on a group that advocates equality for all," he explains. "They call themselves Equalists."

>>30768569

>"Now, I must say that their agenda sounds noble when seen in it's face value. But as my informants has gathered, they are pushing for a total reworking of Equestrian society."
>"Simply put, they aim on abolishing the current monarchy and to replace it with their own collective."
>Straight Flush leans forward and smiles. "It's a clear act of sedition. Just have the head honchos locked up. Why bother calling us up anyways?"
>The Captain shakes his head in disagreement. "Princess Celestia sees no reason to do so as the group in question gives no outward motives hinting to such agendas. And what worries me is that the Equalists now has the sympathy of some of the ministers."
>"They've been actively encouraging Princess Celestia to agree on a memorandum that allows a general election of some sort." The Captain continues.
>"And the specifics of this elections would be?" Rosy Thorn asks.
>"Most possibly a vote of confidence on Princess Celestia," The Captain concludes somberly. The revelation causes hushed whispers from the group. "The Princess still believes she has the favor of the masses but the fruit the Equalists offer is a temptation very hard to refuse."
>"Such vile, two faced creatures, the bunch." The Captain grits his teeth in anger. "By me asking the lot of you for assistance speaks of great lengths on the severity of this problem." He says looking quite displeased.
>Al gives him a wide grin and laughs. "Why would we help you Canterlot stooges in the first place?"
>The Captain returns an equally sarcastic smile to Al. "It gives the masses false hope. False courage," he goes on. "And we know how foolhardy ponies become when given such a false sense of security,yes?"
>"And besides, they've recently encouraged ponies to openly defy organizations such as yours," he finally reveals. "I'm quite sure your friend Dodge here knows what I'm talking about."

>>30768575
>Dodge exhales a cloud of smoke before talking. "Afraid so. Some of the business owners under my territory outright refuse to transact with my family now. I had the best of my collectors chased out of the county twice in a short span of days."
>His eyebrows furrow, his eyes steely. "You know you gots a problem when the whole townfolk turns on you. A few ponies can be roughed up. A whole town is too much of a handful. This problem needs to be squashed as soon as possible."
>This draws out another round of hushed whispers from the group. Then Screech from Griffonstone finally speaks up.
>"What do you propose then?" Aiming his question at The Captain.
>A small smile forms on the Guardsman's face. "Me and my men cannot be seen actively disrupting their meetings and rallies. The Crown can no longer lose face as we are in a rather precarious position. Public opinion is very volatile and can easily be swayed in the favor of Equalists."
>"So, you want us to go to their little picnics and kick shit up?" Al asks with a chuckle. "In short, do your dirty work?"
>"Drastic times call for drastic measures," The Captain says coolly.
>"Of course we also need some assistance from your clique," Screech says slowly. "What can you offer to help with progress?"
>"You have my blessing in this matter," somepony from the shadows say.
>The Guardsmen stand at attention and the group looks behind as the Lunar Princess materializes from the darkness.


-------------------------------
https://pastebin.com/ep5hKseg

TO BE CONTINUED

I'm pleased I was able to mix in this Idea I had for awhile to this story. Would most prolly start the fourth part of the series this Tuesday so yeah.

>>30767106
awesome. you've kept him and the other ponies in-character throughout the whole thing so far, and have stayed faithful to the WH40k lore throughout. I eagerly await the next update.

>>30767689
where Man goes, War is sure to follow.

>>30767951
Over there

>>30766510
Hey man, a mouth is a mouth.
And an anus feels the same in the dark.

>>30747148
Just wanted to say fuck you to the person making The Emoji Movie MLP crossover fic.

You know who you are.

File: See you later fuckers.gif (3MB, 320x165px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 320x165px

>>30771210
>thought it was a joke at first

File: that_feel_fits_on_a_floppy.gif (3MB, 287x191px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 287x191px

>>30772141
>thought "The Emoji Movie" was a joke at first

What the fuck? This can't be a thing, can it?

File: 1491690473340.jpg (48KB, 480x454px) Image search: [Google]

48KB, 480x454px

>>30768601
>>The Guardsmen stand at attention and the group looks behind as the Lunar Princess materializes from the darkness.

>>30772291
Unfortunately, it's all too real. What's next- Fidget Spinner: The Motion Picture?

>>30772453
FFS don't give the writefags any idea

>>30772453
>Fidget Spinner: The Motion Picture
Fidget Spinner: The Perpetual Motion Picture

File: kek_horses_in_river.jpg (267KB, 1038x843px) Image search: [Google]

267KB, 1038x843px

>>30772625

>>30772625
The sequel: Fidget Cube: Fidget Boogaloo

>>30772707
If they cross it over with FiM it'll be Fidget Cube 2: Electric Scootaloo

>>30772912
Will there be breakdancing musical numbers?

>>30773768
Yes, until the lameness reaches critical mass and the film's silliness exceeds the Chandrashekar Limit, at which point the film will collapse into a black hole made of fail and lame at the exact same moment that the film's writers, producers, and directors all vanish up their own assholes and disappear in a tiny sparkly cloud of smugness.

>>30773768
With the dancers spinning spinners in both hands?

File: Celestia_is_disappoint.png (1016KB, 894x894px) Image search: [Google]

1016KB, 894x894px

>>30774018
>hands
>not hooves

>>30769806
Over there where

>>30774114
by the bank

>>30766941
Personally, I don't mind going through some sad to end up comfy. Stories often put the MCs through a bit of adversity. Make seeing them get through it all the more satisfying. I don't know about the strange waifu though. Not my thing.

I miss greentext about anon was a predator and make every mare scare and lewd stuff.

>Be Luna
>Your stomach feels heavy.
>Perhaps you ate something wrong again.
>Groggy you make your way out of you chamber into the castles halls.
>It is way past noon.
>Unusual even for for.
>You blink a couple of times and try to focus.
>What a night...
>Even the royal guards seem down.
>Stressed.
>Maybe your sister gave them a hard time again.
>Not feeling hungry you make your way to the throne room.
>Day court should have ended some time ago...
>...on a usual day at least.
>There are representatives arguing as the walk down the floors.
>Mayor Mare, she has become a usual sight lately.
>When you enter the room your dear sister is lying on her pillow, and resting her eyes.
>The dark circles around her eyes show are easy to spot under her white coat.
>They don't suit her at all.
>While not as radiant, your coat does you a fine service with issues as these.
"Sister, are you alright?"
>It takes her some effort to raise her head.
>"Luna, how are you?"
"Better of than you, it seems," you say with a smile that doesn't come easy to you.
>You get a smile in return.
>"How was the night?"
"It was," you take a moment to find the right words but ultimately decide to go with euphemisms, "it was stimulating."
"How was the court? I've seen Mayor Mare again."
>She lets her head fall to the pillow again.
>"I, well, ... it was stimulating..."
>You raise your hoof to cover mouth as you chuckle.

>>30775364
>>30775364
"It was him right?"
>You move up to her and start to nuzzle your tired sister.
"It is always the individuals isn't it? You still haven't told me about your visit."
>Celestia seems to deflate into the pillow even more.
>"Am I gaining too much weight?"
"Of course not, dear sister! What makes you think that way?"
>If you could have your sisters posterior!
>"Well he kept staring at my haunches, offered nothing but water and I had to sit on the floor, guess how well the discussion went..."
>You rest your hoof on your sisters tired withers.
"Do you want me to...?"
>"Luna you have your own troubles," she says, her head still resting on the pillow.
"Your problems are mine dear sister. And in this case quite literally."
>This gets her to open one of her eyes.
>"Are you saying... ?"
>You sigh.
>"His shadow reaches even into the dreams of ponies, but I have not been able to reach him."
>This gets your sister to raise her head from the pillow and look into your face.
>"Is it that bad?"
"I am afraid so."
>Celestia raises a hoof to rub her chin.
>"Maybe if you reached out to him directly..."
>Your gaze wanders to the marble floor.
"Sister, you know how bad I am with official endeavors."
>She moves to rest a hoof on your shoulder.
>"You are much better than you think, and maybe it will help."
"And what if it doesn't? I would be the third princess to pay him a visit."
>Your worried sister deflates once again.
>"If you can't reach him, we could ask the changelings or even the dragons for help."
"You think that will work?"
>"We are running out of options. We can't let this continue and I am willing to do everything in my power to avoid the last option."
>You wince at her words.
"I..."
>"Sister I need your help."
>You take a deep breath with closed eyes.
"I will aid you any way I can."
>"Thank you, Luna"

>>30775382
>You return her exhausted smile.
>"When will you go to see him?"
"Thinking of the importance of the issue, it might be best if I do it as soon as possible."
>"Today then?"
>You nod, still uncertain if this is really the right course of action.
>"A little piece of advice then, be careful when you speak of his kind."
>She stares into your eyes.
>"I have called him hooman once and I have seen griffons in bloodlust less angry them. It is *human*."
"I will be sure to remember that, dear sister."
>"Just be careful with him, he surely is from another world," your sister says with a worried sigh, her eyes trailing of to the distance.
"I won't let my guard down."
>You give your sister a gentle hug, before you leave the room to attend to some of your regular business.

>>30774166
He's Zew not a jew

>>30775420
this is interesting, please give more

>>30776709
That's not how you spell horse pussy.

>>30775420
>You spend some time doing paperworks.
>Economy and taxes.
>While most is done by your subjects you are the one who has the last word, who has to check for mistakes others might have missed.
>Between sips of your coffee you skim through pages and pages of papers.
>Request, prognoses...
>Manehatten, Baltimare, Van Hoover...
>Ponyville? Can't hurt to do these first, can it?
>You levitate the other papers to their stacks and lay out the papers in front of you.
>While boring beyond any measure, documents as these can often tell a lot of stories.
>You eyes fly over the papers.
"Production increased while taxes are reduced?"
>You read a while and then decide to start early and make a little detour.
>A quick check in the mirror.
>Good enough.
>You down the rest of your coffee, inform your assistants and make an arrangement with your sister before you head to the tower.
>With a powerful stroke of your wings you take off the ground, towards Ponyville.
>Your first stop is Sweet Apple Achres.
>You spot Applejack near the barn.
>Just the pony you have looked for.

>>30777470
"Greetings, Applejack," you say as you land behind her.
>The mare turns around and does a deep bow.
>"Princess Luna! Ah didn't expect you."
>Waiting for her to stand up you give her a wide smile.
"How was the harvest? It will be cider season soon, if I remember correctly?"
>"Yes, your highness."
"Applejack, please call me Luna."
>"Yes Princess Luna."
>"There is no need for formalities, just Luna will be fine."
"Ah am-" she takes of her hat "-mighty honored by your visit, Luna."
>"So how have things been going around the farm?"
>"Well to be honest, it has been a heck of a season," she says as she puts her hat back and looks at the ground.
>"There were some troubles."
>You take a few steps and look around the orchard.
>There is not a single apple hanging on the trees.
"But I hear the harvest turned out good."
>"Oh yes, Pri- Luna we got the best harvest in years. It was so good ah even hired somepony."
>huh
"The pony you hired, was it perhaps not a pony?"
>Applejacks eyes go wide.
>"Y-yeah."
"So you hired Anonymous, is that the reason for your problems?"
>The tired looking Applejack just nods.
"It is."
>That is interesting.
"Has he been good worker? What kind of guy is he?"

>>30777477
>She faces away.
>"Princess Luna ah really shouldn't..."
"Applejack, I know this is not something you like to talk about but this is a royal matter now. Something is wrong and I need your help again."
>She looks at you for a while, unsure how to respond at first.
>"He's a good worker, but he sure is one rotten apple."
"So bad?"
>"Ah've head some fights with him and not that many talks."
>You have only seen him once from afar but if the dreams of the ponies are anything to go by, and they usually are, he is a fiend.
>And if Applejack has trouble with him, you have to prepare yourself for the worst.
"So where does he live?"
>"He's got a house past the river to the east."
"That is highly unusual."
>Applejack nods.
>"It is, Luna, you can't miss it."
"Thank you my dear Applejack. I will have a word with him."
>"Good luck, Luna."
"Thank you and goodbye."
>"Take care, Luna."

>>30777486
>You trot down the path towards the village.
>If your sister can't deal with him, if Twilight Sparkle can't deal with him, how are you supposed to manage him?
>Everything points to him being one hell of a thunderstorm you are flying right into.
>The streets are not as lively as you remember.
>While the market is busy as usual everywhere else there are just a couple of lone stallions walking down the street.
>Despite the sun shining brightly and not a cloud on the horizon the whole village seems gloomy.
>You should pay some ponies a visit while you are in town.
>You haven't seen most of them in ages.
>But first things first.
>So you trot past the market to the east.
>Most ponies give you a bow or wave as you pass but then hurry back to their activities.
>When you reach the bridge your steps get heavier.
>You don't know if it is because of him or because this road leads to the Everfree Forest.
>And towards the old castle.
>There is only one building in sight though.
>It is a large hollow tree which transitions into a cabin.
>A little like Fluttershys cottage but much more lifeless.
>As you reach the door you clear your throat and puff out your chest before.
>Then you knock.


>>30776897
as you wish

>>30777490
>You take a deep breath to steel yourself for the encounter and wait.
>And wait.
>And wait.
"What am I even doing here?"
>Your hooves hit the large wooden door again.
>This time you put more force in each knock.
>On your fifths knock the door is ripped open.
>"WHA-"
>Baggy eyes stare down at you, his mouth hanging slightly agape.
>While he seems paralyzed be your appearance you exmamine this alien figure.
>A white undershirt and black pants on a green body.
>You are a princess! You can do this!
>"Anonymous! We, the Princess of the Night have come to converse with you!"
>You are not sure if that was the right way to make an entrance.
>But at least he started blinking again...
>"P-P-Princess Luna..."
>Has he just gotten up?
>So far this display has not been very impressive.
>Anonymous takes both of his hands to eyes and blinks.
>These humans have tiny eyes for their size.
>Past him you can see clothes and papers and books lying on the floor.
>"I..."
"May we come in, Anonymous?"
>He freezes with his eyes looking through fingers.
>"J-just give me a minute!"
>The door slams inside shut.
>You can see objects fly through the room through the window to the left and there is noise.
>And curses.
>You are about to sit on your haunches when the door opens again.
>With a now washed face and a shirt he says, "please come in, your highness."
>When you pass him you can smell fresh alcohol in his breath.
>Remembering what your sister said you stop barely past the door and look around while he shuts it behind you.
>Anonymous notices you looking around.

>>30778202
>"Shit," and scoots past you to grab random clothes, papers, furniture and tosses them into a corner.
>"I am sorry princess, I wasn't prepared..."
>He takes a stack books and papers from one of the only two chairs.
>"Please sit down! Or take the be- no, new covers!"
"The chair will work just fine Anonymous."
>"C-can I offer you anything? I have tea, and water and..."
>"Are you hungry? I have an apple," he says as he clears the table, shoving stacks of papers into his arms and dropping them next to the others on the ground.
>You would be mad but you came unannounced you to be quite honest you know what it feels like.
>Still, this is not what you expected.
>You sit down in the now free chair.
"Just tea would be fine."
>"Okay."
>Anonymous is more busy with making the preparations and cleaning than anything else at this point.
>While the water starts to boil Anonymous puts a fresh cover on a pillow and hands it to you.
>This is... weird...
>When the tea is done, Anonymous sets it down on the table with a bar of chocolate drags the chair from the desk to the table.
>"So, Anonymous-"
>"Cups!"
>Almost tripping over the stuff on the floor Anonymous towards the sink.
>This is not what you expected, not at all.
>Midst rinsing of the cup he stops for a second.
>"I apologize, Princess," he says over his shoulder.
>Is he afraid? Maybe you overdid it.
"Take your time Anonymous."
>This place is such a chaos.
>Discord would like it. Maybe Twilight too, judging by all the books.
>She said something about stolen books if your memory serves you right...

>>30778210
>Anonymous has returned with the cups and is serving the tea and sitting down.
>"I am sorry Princess."
>He glances at you but his gaze always wanders back to his cup.
"Anonymous I have come to discuss your situation."
>"My situation?"
>"We, my sister and I have received numerous accounts of complaints from ponies. Your behavior is unacceptable."
"I didn't... hurt anyone..."
"Not physically, no. But you assaulted ponies none the less. They are afraid of you, Anonymous."
>"I just... booped... one or two..."
"Just?"
>You sigh.
"There was no physical harm true, but being shackled, blinded and locked away doesn't cause physical harm either."
>"You are right."
>Is he toying with you?
>You levitate the cup towards your lips and take a sip.
>That is really good tea.
"I don't know what it is that you do to my subjects but it is even giving them nightmares."
>Anonymous glances up at you and his eyes lock on yours for a couple of seconds before they go back to his cup.
>"I didn't know that. I will try to-"
>He shakes his head. "I will change that, Princess Luna"
>You slam your hoof on the table.
"Are you taking us for a fool!?"
>Anonymous flinches, his eyes going wide.
>"N-n-no..."
"We demand that you change your ways! This is your last chance Anonymous!"
>Anonymous just looks at you in fear.
>You get up to leave and lunch yourself into the air.

>>30778214
>Woona comes and threatens you
>says you have to stop booping ponies

Why even live?

>>30778214
>Gritting your teeth you fly back to the castle.
>Celestia is standing on the balcony, ready to welcome you back.
>Seeing your face she just asks, "that bad?"
"Two weeks", you say passing her.
>"What happened?"
>You march towards your chamber.
>"Sister, don't do this. Please."
"He toyed with me! He played a wimp, played a gentlemen!"
>You look back over your shoulder to face your sister with tears in your eyes.
"He thought he could get away with making fun of me! That I am just the little sister!"
>Celestia warps her legs around your neck, pulling you in a tight hug.
>"If that is true, I will show him no mercy."
"No, this is now my problem and I will deal with him."
>Celestia lets go of you.
>Her face is full of worry.
>"I understand, Luna, but I will always be there if you need me."
"Thank you, sister."

This concludes the first part.
I hope it is okay.

>>30778353
i don't understand what's going on at all

>>30778637
Anon boop'd Woona on her wittle snooter and she mad.

>>30778637
>>30778790
o0

File: ce8bb6192503c55c8205f3db5501f9e0.jpg (61KB, 500x487px) Image search: [Google]

61KB, 500x487px

>>30747148
Euronymous in Equestria?

>>30778353
I read the first few lines and it felt like you're either underage as fuck, or someone who barely speaks, much less writes, English. It gets better after that, but the first impression is terrible.
You also switch between tenses, sometimes using present and sometimes using past tense. Pick one and stick to it.
And it's not just the grammar. Your storytelling is lacking, too. Most of the time you just flat out tell what happens with little description.

This is based on reading a bit here and another there as I couldn't bring myself to read it all.

File: horse-is-gettin-real-tired-of-your-shit.jpg (85KB, 499x740px) Image search: [Google]

85KB, 499x740px

>>30778867
Eponymous in Equestria?

>>30779236
later

>>30763990
“What do you think of all this, sister?”
>You were still looking at the spot where Twilight had dived off the balcony from as you heard the grating of wood on wood, caused by your sister closing the drawer she'd taken the vial from.
>You then hear your sister's deep, long sigh.
>”I don't like it. I don't like it one bit.”
>She spoke slowly and her voice was deeper than usual.
>”I feel as if we are being drawn into another conflict. I'm not sure why, but it reminds me of the return of the Crystal Empire.”
>Turning around, you faced your sister, only to find her staring at a spot on the floor in front of her, an empty expression on her face.
>You wanted to say something comforting and place your muzzle across her withers to make her feel better, but a certain half-remembered dream haunted you.
“I have felt it too, sister.”
>You spoke quietly, hoping to soften the impact of your words.
“A gray unicorn, a guard in your gilded armor, gallops into the throne room, shouting my name.”
>It was as if the memory had come to life in your mind, as if the hurried hoofsteps were echoing in the room as you spoke.
“'Princess Luna, you've got to come quick! Something's happened to Princess Celestia!', he says.”
>You closed your eyes and saw the floor of polished marble, shiny enough for you to see your own reflection.

>>30779826
“I ask him what's happened, but he does not know.”
>The gray unicorn, Shining Spear, looked at you.
>His eyes could not remain still but bolted from your eyes to your ears to your horn and back to your eyes, and his mouth opened and closed silently a few times before he managed to say anything.
“'I don't know, Princess Luna, it was over in an instant.'”
>You trotted closer to him, keeping your eyes fixed on his, your shod hooves causing the throne room to echo with their steps.
“'Princess Luna, I'm sorry, but there was nothing I could do to stop it.'”
>He was staring at your hooves, but you forced him to lift his face with one hoof.
“What happened? Where is my sister?”
>He tried to look away, but you forced his head to remain in place.
“Tell me.”
>You yanked his head a little bit higher and brought your muzzle a bit closer to his.
>”I- I... She's in the alien's room, Anonymous' room. I don't know what happened, I... I'm sorry!”
>Tears were forming in his eyes, and you knew he couldn't tell you anything else now so you let go of him.
Sister?
>You focused your magic and spread your wings, taking off faster than any but the very best of the Wonderbolts.
>The castle's hallways were a blur as you sped through them, your mere passing sending both furniture and ponies flying.
Luna?

>>30779829
>You blinked.
>”Luna, what happened?”
>Celestia's worried face filled your vision.
>”Is something wrong?”
>It had been so real and happened without any warning.
“I...”
>It was as if you, the guardian of Equestria's dreams, had been suddenly forced into a nightmare.
“I couldn't stop the dream. I only meant to tell you about it, but then the memory took over and I saw more than I have seen before.”
>A look of confusion spread onto your sister's face as you paused.
“Something happened to you in Anonymous' room, sister, and I was flying there as fast as I could when your voice brought me back.”
>Your sister looked away and brought a hoof to her chin, her brows furrowing as she concentrated on something.
>”But... Even you can't force someone who's awake into seeing a dream. And you are by far the most gifted dreamweaver there is.”
>A heavy silence filled the room for a while.
“I agree with you, sister. I do not like this, not one bit.”
>You closed the distance between you, your insignia bumping into her regalia, resting your muzzle on her withers.
>Celestia immediately reciprocated in kind, and you also felt her hoof on your back.
>Closing your eyes, you listened to her heartbeat and let the warmth of her body drive away the lingering remnants of the nightmare.
“But whatever there is to come...”
>”We shall always face it together.”
>You said the last part together, as if one.

>>30779832
https://pastebin.com/5m1dnQZ0

I'm not even going to bother this time.

>>30779840
(you)

>>30778353
Yeah, it's pretty confusing and some of the ponies we've met feel out of character.

>>30779840
Starting to worry where this is going with the whole "vial of blood" thing but you still have my interest.

>>30779840
Es guud mango

>>30778214
>boop is a fight
Go on...

>>30767083

>You were unsurprised to find that meat was not available here.
>The staff returns quickly with your order, the speed of the service likely owing to the fact that no actual cooking was involved.
>Your meal consists of a variety of vegetables on bread slathered in some manner of sauce.
>Perhaps not what you would have chosen, but it is quite enjoyable all the same.
>"So what do you think, this place is great right?" Stormy asks tearing in to her own food with her usual enthusiasm.
"It is certainly different from the food at the castle, but it is not without its charm."
>Movement at the periphery of your vision causes you to turn your head.
>"There, that's one of the airships I was talking about. That's the Lavender Spirit I think."
>The ship consists of a large wooden gondola shaped much like a nautical sailing vessel suspended beneath a massive balloon.
>The balloon itself seems to be modeled after some manner of leviathan sea creature complete with eyes and fins.
>As you watch the ship swings on a languid arc around the outer edge of the mountain.
>As it draws closer you note that it seems to be propelling itself along by means of fins mounted along the hull of the gondola.
>Some unseen mechanism forcing them to push through the air like a fish through water.
>The ship is close enough now that you can see a few ponies on deck, though if they are passengers or crew you could not say.
>Stormy moves over the the railing at the edge of the roof and waves to the ponies as they pass.
>A few of those aboard the airship return the gesture.
>You simply stand content to watch the ship as it passes by.
>Eventually the ship passes out of sight as it continues around the mountains edge, the many buildings of Canterlot obstructing your view.
>Afterwards you finish eating and return to the castle.
>Upon your return you receive word from one of the servants that the copies of your tome have been made as requested.

>>30781847
>You retain one copy for yourself and give one to Stormy so that she might better learn her part in tomorrows events.
>The other copies you give to the servant to distribute to the sergeants and Lieutenant Argent, since he has volunteered his assistance.
>"I'd better call it an early day if I'm gonna have to memorize some of this for tomorrow." She says tucking her copy beneath a wing to carry.
"That is just as well, Princess Luna should be up soon and there are a few matters I wish to discuss with her for tomorrow."
>"Always work with you isn't it?" Stormy says teasingly as she makes her exit.
>Since you have the time to spare you quickly skim through your own work again, a blank scroll open nearby to make notations as needed.
>The Princess may well have questions regarding this new training and you want to be as prepared as you can to explain anything to her that might come up.
>As you work through and annotate you find yourself quickly filling the scroll.
>Absorbed in your work as you are you quickly lose track of time.
>Fearing you may have wasted what time Luna is in court you rush to gather up your tome and notes but pause when you note something odd.
>The sun should be setting at this hour, at least it has since you've been on Equus but there it sits.
>It hangs low in the sky to be sure but it has yet to dip towards the horizon as it should.
>Perhaps the time of sunset has changed any the everyone neglected to inform you.
>It is most likely an innocent mistake or some regular occurrence you have yet to see, all the same you decide to make haste for the throne room.
>You tread quickly along the now familiar path but stop when you come to the antechamber outside the throne room.
>The chamber usual devoid of all but the ceremonial guard at this time of day is packed with two full squads.
>Not only troops from Luna's own night guard but Celestia's forces as well.
>Among the Night's Watch forces you spot Corporal Lantern Light.

>>30781849
"Corporal, you're looking more awake than when last we spoke."
>She smirks at that "And you're more well dressed."
>Gesturing around all the guards lining the sides of the antechamber you ask.
"What is all of this?"
>"Emergency meeting between the Princesses. Apparently something happened at the Crystal Castle. I haven't heard many details other than that."
>Keeping your expression stoic you give a nod.
>It doesn't take someone with three hundred years of battlefield experience to guess that this is related to the report Celestia received earlier.
"The situation must be dire indeed. I will speak with the Princess at once."
>Laying your notes and tome down on one of the small tables decorating the antechamber you move for the door.
>Before you lay your fingers on the handle of the door the sergeant of Celestia's guard lowers his spear across the door to bar your path.
>"By order of the Princess only senior military staff are allowed entry at this time."
>You turn a stony glare on the sergeant.
"I may not yet have taken my oaths to Luna but I am a Knight of the Order and three hundred years your elder. I will speak with the Princess now."
>The sergeant hesitates but moves his spear to unbar your path. You give a slight nod to the Sergeant before pushing the door open.
>The long carpet muffles your steps as you approach the throne.
>Upon the dais you can see both Princesses engaged in an intense discussion.
>Surrounding the Princesses are scribes and functionaries, among them Raven, who upon spotting you, draws Celestia's attention to you.
>"Anon, I'm afraid you've come at a bad time my Sister and I were just discussing what action to take about the incident.."
>"Attack." Luna says interrupting. Celestia gives the Princess of the Night a sharp look but Luna seems unfazed.
>"The Incident." "Celestia corrects. "In the Crystal Castle."
"It was my understanding that something had occurred there. I wish to aide in any way that I can."

>>30781852
Here's the updated pastebin https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe
Didn't get as much written Monday evening as I wanted ended up sleeping like half the day after the eclipse since I'm only used to being awake at night.
Don't work today like I usually do so when I'm up later I'll work on getting another update up.

>>30781857
It's funny to see anon pulling rank like that, but I'm sure it'll be worth it. Looking forward to the next update.

Remember, raping ponies is frowned upon unless you scream, "Ape Rape" first.

>>30782416
I though mare enjoying rape?

>>30782416
But then it's no longer surprize buttsecks.

File: 1483800070539.gif (62KB, 706x720px) Image search: [Google]

62KB, 706x720px

>>30778637
>>30779209
>>30780698
That is...
Oh

>>30782506
Then she has to pay the extra enjoyment tax. Since Anon is employed as the Ponyville rapist it is a part of the services he is required to provide.
.>>30782747
Surprise buttsex is only allowed on federal holidays.

>>30783524
Get that looked at

>>30783644
Don't tell me how to live!

File: mm mm good.png (113KB, 910x630px) Image search: [Google]

113KB, 910x630px

>>30782894
Can't be the best without figuring out where you're fucking up so you can do better.

>>30783996
Good point and nice plo...er PICTURE, yeah, nice picture.

>>30781857
Good update and world building. I love airships impractical by modern standards they may be. There's just something about them.

>The setting sun (or lack thereof)
Nice touches showing how accustomed Anoniaus is getting with his new home and how much he's willing to protect it. I don't think he fully gets it yet and maybe THAT is what is haunting his subconisous mind.

File: stuff.png (193KB, 777x628px) Image search: [Google]

193KB, 777x628px

>>30784339
remember to stay properly hydrated

>>30783842
Don't make me come over there.

For anyone following it, I just dumped Chapter 9 of my Herd thing over here >>30786325

Binned here: https://pastebin.com/0Lv0JeEa

Thanks for bearing with me. I know I'm a dreadfully slow writer.

>>30786508
Slow green is better than no green

>>30781936
Glad you're enjoying it.
He mainly pulled rank because he took a slight offense to the idea that he wouldn't be considered trusted enough military staff to aide the Princesses.
Given his particular skill set and nature Anon wouldn't wanna sit out any problem he could help resolve for them after all the kindness they've shown him.

>>30784466
Thanks, and you're right at least partially. He hasn't quite realized yet how much he's come to think of this place as home, but that's not entirely what's haunting his dreams.

>>30781852
>"That is kind of you to offer but at the moment we are still still sorting out the details of what transpired."
>Luna gestures towards you with a hoof while facing her sister.
>"You should not be so quick to dismiss him sister. We could dispatch him to the castle to guard it as a temporary measure."
>Celestia gives a sigh of exhaustion. It is late in the day for her and the rings beneath her eyes show clearly just how taxing a day it has been.
>"Luna we've been over this we don't even know if there's anything to guard against. We can't risk causing a panic over nothing."
"Forgive me if I speak out of turn Princess, but what exactly has transpired."
>Luna looks to Celestia who gives a nod before turning to you.
>"Several hours ago an intruder was by staff in the lower levels of the Crystal Castle."
>"The guards were summoned and gave chase but failed to apprehend the intruder as it fled into the sewers."
>Celestia suppresses a yawn and adds. "I've extended the daylight to give them more time to search but so far nothing has been found."
>"One servant was found unconscious in the area near where the intruder was spotted meaning this may have been an attack."
>"Or it the servant may have fainted from fright." Celestia rebuts "She suffered no injury aside from a minor bump on the head."
>Luna gives her sister an indignant glare. "Why are you not treating this matter with the seriousness it deserves?"
>"I am taking this very seriously, and you need to consider what would happen if the citizens started jumping at every shadow."
>"It could be just like the weeks after the the wedding all over again. Ponies seeing changelings everywhere. That's why we can't just end more guards."
>This is clearly an argument the sister have been over several times before your arrival.
"If I may be so bold Princess. Send me to assist with this matter. I can assist in seeing to the defense of the castle while the others track the intruder."

>>30787626
>Luna is quick to seize the initiative, nodding in agreement with you. "We can simply say that it Anon is visiting the Empire before the ceremonies here."
>"You have seen what he is capable of, he is as good as sending entire squad of guards, perhaps more."
>You can see Celestia considering the options. "It could work, but the parade and medal ceremony is in two days."
>Luna reaches out to rest a hoof on her sister's shoulder reassuringly.
>"We can consider that in the morning when you've had time to rest. By then we should be able to decide if the matter is resolved or requires a more open approach."
>Celestia relents giving a nod of acceptance.
>"Very well, Sir Anoniaus we ask that you take such measures as are necessary to ensure the safety of the Crystal Empire, but please exercise discretion."
"You have my word."
>Luna smiles "Then the matter is settled for the moment. We shall inform Cadence and Shining Armor and you shall depart within the hour."
>"I will retire for now."Celestia says "Please raise the moon if there are no further reports from the guards soon."
>Celestia bids Luna good night and you farewell before leaving for her chambers, her guards falling in around her as she goes.
>Luna gestures imperiously to one of her guards. "Have my chariot prepared to transport Anon."
>The guard salutes smartly and rushes off to execute Luna's orders.
>"Anon I trust that you will use discretion as my sister has asked, but if you need to act do not hesitate to do so. I will grant you my full authority."
>That was a bit more than you were expecting.
>You had thought Luna might feel a certain kinship to you from seeing the events of your past.
>She had alluded to has much before, but to place the full authority of the throne behind you...
>Clearly the Princess of the Night has placed a great deal of trust in you.

>>30787629
>It is time to reciprocate the gesture.
"I give you my thanks Princess."
>You draw your sword and take a knee resting the blade point down against the marble one hand resting lightly on the cross guard.
>With your other hand you reach up and remove your helm, baring your head so that Luna might look upon your face.
"and I would give you my oath of service if you would have it."
>"Anon, I wasn't expecting this. That is to say I haven't written a new oath and I've not had a knight since before my banishment."
>You've caught the Princess off guard. She's visibly flustered and struggling to regain her composure.
>"I had hoped to ask after the medal ceremony you see."
>Luna says tapping her front hooves together.
>Clearly your taking the oath when is ready means something to Luna.
>You've met no other knights in your time in Equestria.
>Given her banishment ended only recently by your understanding you must be the first knight to swear to her in a very long time.
"Then I shall swear to protect this land and it's people, and to serve your interests as best I am able."
>You rise and re-sheath your sword smoothly with one hand tucking your helm beneath the other arm.
"And I shall take my proper vows when you are ready."
>"Thank you." Luna says simply before clearing her throat. "I will send one of the servants for your belongings. If you will follow me."
>Luna once again her regal self strides from the throne room with you beside her.
>She pauses in the antechamber long enough to summon a servant to collect your belongings.
>There is little to collect aside from your clothing and armor maintenance supplies.
>Once that is returned Luna guides you out on to one of the spires at the rear of the castle.
>The balcony of spire is unusually long and lacks a railing at the far end.
>The winged chariot sitting at the center suggests that this is used as a runway.
>Harnessed to the front of the chariot with lengths of midnight blue chain are a pair of bat ponies.

>>30787632
>One of them you recognize as Corporal Lantern Light, who gives a quick wave of the wing when she sees you looking.
>"Princess Cadence and Shining armor will be in regular contact with us. If you have anything to report in your time there inform them."
>Looking at the vehicle you can see that the seat was designed with the Princess in mind.
>The cushion is low and wide nestled between the low bat winged sides of the chariot.
>A cursory inspect reveals no restraint harness to prevent you falling out.
"Princess, I suspect you are a good deal lighter than I am.."
>"Fear not." Luna says with an amused grin "It will hold. I must attend my duties now. Corporal Night Light will see you to the Crystal Castle."
"Farewell for now Princess."
>You climb awkwardly into the chariot.
>Rather than worry about the fact a man of your stature in such a vehicle may look comical you find a comfortable position.
>"You ready back there." Lantern Light calls out over her shoulder.
>You're in a magical open topped chariot with no restraints and two creatures each less than a fifth of your size pulling it.
>This is probably as ready as you're going to get.
"Ready."
>Night Light and her partner begin surging forward, the chains pull taut and the chariot starts to roll towards open space.
>It seems unlikely given all the things you've seen in this land that you're about to plummet to your death.
>All the same with the precipitous drop looming before you you take a grip on the edge of the chariot.
>The pair of bat ponies at the lead rush off the ledge diving downward as they take to wing the chariot rolling swiftly behind them.
>They spread their wings in unison turning the momentum of the dive into an ascent.
>You had expected a sudden lurch as the chains on the chariot pull taut but instead it trails smoothly along behind them.
>Whatever enchantment holds the chariot aloft also seems to hold you in your seat.

File: Fallen Angel Squad.jpg (413KB, 726x1170px) Image search: [Google]

413KB, 726x1170px

>>30787640
That's all for the moment. Here's the updated pastebin https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe
Also If I've attached it right should be a picture of what the Fallen look like for anyone that might have been curious.

>>30787654
Holy god quality content, but never enough. I can't wait for more!

>>30787668
Thanks, glad to hear it. I do wish I could make the updates longer but I write pretty slow.
I tend to rough out a post then reword things a few times until I'm satisfied. That and some times plain working through a block slows it down.

>>30787654
Fucking quality as usual fallanon. The scene between Luna and Anon was pretty adorable, I've got a big soft spot for that kind of thing, a huge and powerful force swearing to protect a much smaller and at least physically weaker one. Can't wait for the next update.

>>30787745
Glad you liked that bit, I wasn't super sure about it at first.
I'm basing parts of Luna's personality on what few pages of the comics I had seen with her.

>>30787753
Well, I'm also a big fan of Luna, especially a slightly out of touch Luna just getting back up to speed. I also like how you write her a bit more militaristic than her sister, it suits her to have a monsterous alien knight at her disposal.

>>30787632
Top cute 10/10 Moony

>>30784520
God damn it Dresshorse!
No one wants to drink your pee.
Not even Spike.

>>30788870
Ok

File: 1366327300900.gif (26KB, 210x210px) Image search: [Google]

26KB, 210x210px

>>30788870

>>30787623
>but that's not entirely what's haunting his dreams.
Why did I just read that hearing a "Muuwaahahaha" coming from fallanon in my mind?

>>30787654
I agree with those other Anons. Top quality stuff there. Excellent update. I'm also of the same mindset as >>30788043 regarding Luna. I'm loving your portrayal of her here.

>Stormy, Lantern and even Luna
>the prof maybe
It seems Anoniaus is finding himself surrounded by good friends. Excellent character development.

I look forward to the next update. I hope Anon's power armor doesn't crack the crystal as he walks among the Crystal Empire.

Where the fuck is 8th? He is way behind on writing Moonie.
I need my cute fix!

>>30790632
Last seen in a high stakes knifey spooney showdown.

>>30788170
Always need more Luna

>>30790632
He was going to the store but ran into a tornado.

>>30792277
ended up in kansas

>Day open the door get on the floor
>Everybody walk the dinosaur
>Sadly that's not what you find when you open the door
>"Good morning Anonymous."
>and if there was ever to be any dancing it wouldn't be from this one
"Morning Twilight. What friendship test is it this time?"
>She scoffs at your remark
>"I don't need a friendship problem to want to visit my favorite human."
"And my house wanted to be a split level."
>"See, everybody wins."
>Your coffee mug slides off the table and shatters
"I was being sarcastic."
>Twilight stares right passed you trying to magic the cup back together
>You do the only thing you can do and count to 10
"It's fine."
>"Hmm? Oh. If you say so."
>She gives up the task and the floating bits fall from the air becoming even littler bits
>"I never could get pieces to stick together. The only way I'd be able to fix is traveling back in time. Doable, but it always makes quite the adventure."
>She laughs
>You count to 20
"So, in what way do you plan to ruin my life today?"
>"Hey, I only have the best intentions."
>Your house groans before making an ear splitting crack as your kitchen becomes your basement
>"Wellllll, forget that. Today I'm going to fix everything and make your dreams come true."
"You're going to pay my repair bill?"
>"Even better!"
>You consider if your medicine cabinet has enough pills to overdose on
>"I'm going to send you back in time before you came here!"
"Wait, what? Didn't you just say how much of a bad idea that is?"
>"No, I said how it always lead to an adventure, and this time it'll be YOUR adventure. Maybe you can undo whatever it was that got you stuck here."
>Hope. Warm blissful hope beams throughout your insides
>You may finally be free!
>"Don't look too excited or you may hurt my feelings."
>Bless this horse
"Okay, I'm ready. Do it."
>Her smile falters for a minute
>"Don't you have any goodbyes to make first?"

>>30794480
>Shoot, she's right. This may be your last moment in Equestria
>You should say a proper farewell to all those you have come to know throughout your time here
"Goodbye Twilight. Now hit me."
>"I suppose it's good enough."
>A bright purple glow blasts your face
>Then, nothing

>You open your eyes to blue skies, fresh flowers, and singing birds
>50/50 which world you're in
>Next to you is your off center door
>Great
>Grudgingly you look at your feet and see a happy purple pony
>Fantastic
"Seems you messed up again."
>"What do you mean?"
"Your spell didn't work."
>"Oh, don't you mind that. It was silly of me to think teleporting your house would send you home. After-all, you're already home, technically speaking."
"Please never say those words again; even in the technical sense."
>"Sorry, but don't you worry. Today I have an even better idea."
"And what's that?"
>"Pack your bags Anonymous because I'm sending you back in time before you came here."
"Wait, no!"
>"Send me a post card."
>A bright purple glow blasts your face

>>30794476
that poor bastard

File: 1503485959478.png (77KB, 241x458px) Image search: [Google]

77KB, 241x458px

>>30794493
No no no

you got it all wrong twilight

Going to other universes is achieved by means of the 'Friendly Japanese Truck of Transdimensional Travel'.

>>30794957
"Twilight, for the last time we did this already."
>"I don't think so. I'd remember something like casting the most powerful spell in existence."
"I'm telling you, you don't remember because I'm from the future. How is this a hard concept to grasp?"
>"Meh. I still want to try it."
>A bright purple van blasts your face spiraling you to the past where Twilight' evil is law
>A whisper carries through the motorized portal
>"My love for you is like a truck."

>>30794957
They normally overcharge you though.

File: the_superlative_kek.jpg (261KB, 517x768px) Image search: [Google]

261KB, 517x768px

>>30795277

>>30794550
>Reaching down he plucks the madly scrabbling huntsman spider off the top of his boot.
>Tucking the pissed off arachnid in the crook of his arm and petting it as he looks around at th corn infested surroundings.
"I've got a feeling we're not in Straya anymore, cunt.

>>30794493
F

>>30794550
at least it wasn't new jersey

>>30798182
One does not simply walk into New Jersey!

>>30798292
Take the tunnel

File: theme-2-middle.jpg (273KB, 640x448px) Image search: [Google]

273KB, 640x448px

I've got some prompt ideas.

>Equestria is in economic dire straits, great depression bad.
>Anon being an sauve buisness man, engineer and industrialist (Imagine the engineer from Factorio.) comes up with an economic plan that'll bring Equestria back to it's former glory.
>However it involves Equestria's most hostile, but yet most resource loaded region, the Everfree forest.
>So, in a desperate bid, they wind up selling large swaths of it for cheap, including deer land (because deer don't fucking pay taxes, the dirty hippies.)
>After awhile of the factories being set-up, the woodland creatures start trashing Anon's factories.
>Anon responds by putting up sentry guns and adding more venison to his menu.
>Fluttershy tries going to the princesses, but her suggestions have been shot down mainly by the fact that Equestria is hurting for money right now and the Everfree has been nothing but trouble.
>Fluttershy starts her crusade against Anonymous.

File: Fluttershy_tiptoes_away.gif (82KB, 500x300px) Image search: [Google]

82KB, 500x300px

>>30798771
>Fluttershy starts her crusade against Anonymous.
>"Anonymous, pls stop. if you don't mind."
>"pls no bully"

>>30779832
>The door to your sister's room closed behind you.
“I still think we should tell him, he can keep a secret.”
>You had concluded that Anonymous was in need of the services of a tailor, and that you would take him to one tonight.
>But your sister had insisted that you keep him in the dark about both the dream and the properties of his blood.
>Celestia's point of view was understandable: a few careless words in the wrong place and rumors would start to spread.
>And while Equestria was largely peaceful and benign, it was not without those whose lust for power greater than their love for others.
>”I'm worried about what could happen to him if someone like Chrysalis found out.”
>For a moment the only thing to be heard was the sound of you and your sister's hooves as you headed towards the tower where Anonymous was.
>Then you heard your sister sigh.
>”You're right, sister. I should trust him more, and not think of him as a threat but as a friend.”
>You looked to your side, at your sister, glad that she had let go of the role of a lone ruler she took on all too often.
“Perhaps you should ask him if he wants to be more than friends, it is not often that you get to be with someone your own size.”
>Celestia rolled her eyes at your quip and lightly kicked your flank.
>It stung, but you knew how much she hated what you just did.
>Which was precisely why you did it.

>>30799247
“Hello? Anonymous?”
>You knocked on his door before opening it with a quick flick of magic, finding Anonymous sitting on the floor, drawing something on a piece of paper.
>He looked up from his work, silently eyeing you and your sister.
>”I see you're enjoying the things I sent you earlier. Did you take a look at the book, too?”
>You glanced at your sister.
>There was a light smile on her face and her eyes were slightly narrowed, telling of her eagerness to hear his reply.
>She hadn't told she'd given him a book, and you wondered which one she'd chosen.
>”I did look at the book, and I found out that this-”
>He tugged at the chain of the pendant he was wearing while you rudely stared at him in surprise.
>He... had an accent. A strong one.
>You hadn't expected him to have one, he hadn't had one when you'd met in his dream.
>”-does not work on writing. So, I could not read it.”
>The way he pronounced his R's reminded you of something.
>Lotus and Aloe, Ponyville's spa keepers. Their accent was similar to Anonymous'. Not identical, but close.
>”That's a shame. It's such a well written book. But, that's not why we're here.”
“Yes, we decided that it's time to let you out of this room. We believe you would appreciate a visit to a tailor, would you not?”
>He said nothing for a moment, the expression on his face changing into one you weren't familiar with.
>”A tailor? I would have suggested a laundry. But, I guess just getting out of this boring room is good.”
>”There's a few things we need to talk about first. Just follow us, we'll take you somewhere more appropriate.”

>>30799254
>You instructed the guards to not let anyone into the throne room for any reason and closed the doors behind you.
>Anonymous was examining one of the stained glass windows with Celestia, sliding his fingers across some of its features while listening to her story on what it depicted.
>Trotting closer, you cleared your throat to get their attention.
“I believe there is something we need to discuss.”
>They turned around, Anonymous letting his hand fall to his side, your sister glancing at you before looking back at him.
>”Yes. I'm not sure if you have been told, but you were attacked the moment you arrived. I was close enough to intervene before anything serious happened, but we cannot let you out on your own for now.”
>Anonymous furrowed his brows and opened his mouth, then closed it and looked at the floor for a second before looking up again.
>”Why would someone attack me?”
>His tone was higher than usual, and he had clenched his hands into fists.
“You were attacked because the ponies were afraid. Your arrival was ominous and you are both large and alien.”
>He opened his mouth for a second again, but remained silent and turned his head to look away.
>You heard him sigh.
>”You should not worry yourself with it. They will get used to you in time.”
“Ponies are no strangers to different species and I'm sure they will be eager to meet you once they learn you're friendly.”
>Both Celestia and you simultaneously took a step closer to him.
>He heard you move and flinched as he turned to face you again, a hint of red spreading onto his face as his eyes fixed themselves on the tip of your horn.
>”I suppose I will believe you.”
>Crossing his arms in front of himself, he made his mouth form a straight line as he seemed to fill himself with new determination.

>>30799261
“There is one more thing you should know.”
>You glanced at your sister, who nodded at you.
“You gave a blood sample earlier and we have studied it. It has reacted very strongly to Equestria's magic, absorbing vast amounts of it. It seems like the magic stored in it can easily be used by anypony.”
>“Thankfully, it does not seem to affect you in any way. But there are some less than savory characters in Equestria who would go great lengths to acquire such power. So we would ask you to keep it a secret unless you want to attract these beings.”
>Anonymous stared at your sister, his left eyebrow arced and his arms still crossed.
>It made you feel like he thought she was dumb.
>”So if it does not affect me and you want me to keep it a secret, why tell me at all?”
>You were about to answer when you heard him draw a sharp breath.
>”Great. So not am I only a scary monster, but my blood is also valuable enough for some to hunt me. What a wonderful situation I have got myself into.”
>That had to be sarcasm, you concluded, and did your best to remember his tone and expression to recognize them in the future.
>The more you learned about him, the more he reminded you of a pony, only larger and a bit differently shaped.

File: 1399407830308.png (65KB, 659x600px) Image search: [Google]

65KB, 659x600px

>>30747148
>listening to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LD3NKlS55g
>Imagine Anon being an 80's noir type detective in canterlot
Good idea or pass?

>>30799268
https://pastebin.com/5m1dnQZ0

I feel like I can't quite capture the essence of the two sisters, especially Celestia. I sometimes have to rewrite her lines several times to get them to sound like something she'd say.

File: 1383456958900.jpg (4KB, 261x195px) Image search: [Google]

4KB, 261x195px

>>30799280
>that fucking sax!

>>30799280
Everything can be a good idea. I'd be interested to see what you do with it.

I was working on one, but it became very dark.

>>30799280
>These aren't my glasses

>>30799281
I like it. Just hope i can read all the fucking archive.

>>30802247
Do it fgt

Error: "page 10" not found

>>30803504
F5 it

Slow

>>30798904
Kek.

>>30804935
Crazy horse pussy.

>>30804211

>>30768601
Is anon going to get the job and become known as Baba Yaga
https://youtu.be/mXlfuiO7d3s

>>30806148
whoa

>>30806931
Put your dick in it, but don't take it home or give it your real number.

>>30806351
Sure

>>30807029
Uh oh

>Anon ends up making interracial/interspecies zebra porn
>Mares clop to the idea of an innocent stallion being defiled by a zebra
>Despite the fact that Anon is the only human in Equestria, no one knows it's him
>It gets a bit uncomfortable when his friends bring up zebra porn and ask him if he knows the humans that show up in it

>Anon hates doing porn, but it pays too well for him to quit.
>When he started out, they were paying him below minimum wage due to a legal technicality, but now he's making more than most doctors and lawyers.
>Come to think of it, the studio has been getting a lot of very expensive upgrades lately.
>Is fetish porn really this lucrative of an industry?

File: mask.jpg (108KB, 1001x1001px) Image search: [Google]

108KB, 1001x1001px

>>30808991
>no one knows it's him
he just wears a crappy domino mask

File: Lyra_boing.gif (255KB, 499x549px) Image search: [Google]

255KB, 499x549px

>>30806148
She's not crazy, Anon. She's just kind of enthusiastic.

>>30808991
kek
>Anon is deeply ambivalent about this
>in most of his films his co-star is Zecora
>who is also deeply ambivalent about this
>"For money we will do your tricks, but we don't like your taking pics."
>fucking A
>strangely no one knows it's her either
>ponies are just oblivious
>most of them
>you're starting to get fanmail signed only with what you think are cutie marks
>the pink asterisk thing is Twilight Sparkle, you're almost certain
>and that's disturbing
>you've seen her on a bad mane day and you're not willing to stick it in the crazy
>a little more disturbing are the ones that come with sun and moon markings and an invitation to "come up and see us some time"
>do they know?
>you're trying to imagine the Princesses getting drunk and watching porn together
>it's not cute any more
>how did your life get so out of control?

File: thats kind of hot.jpg (9KB, 250x203px) Image search: [Google]

9KB, 250x203px

>>30809404
>you're trying to imagine the Princesses getting drunk and watching porn together

File: f8a75fee807827f933b87efeb1c484f5.png (3MB, 6224x6118px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 6224x6118px

>>30809404
>>you're trying to imagine the Princesses getting drunk and watching porn together

>>30790632
He'll be away for a few weeks, should be back in mid September though.
He's not dead. Yet.

>>30811162
k

Dumping some shit I'm writing. Please tell me if it's worth continuing.

>You’re Lyra
>You’re checking your correspondence while Bon Bon prepares lunch
>Bills, bills, a liquid soap sample… a letter from the Anon family?! You haven’t heard of them in a while
>A couple of years ago, two human beings (Anonymous and Enigma) and a pony (Anonfilly) showed up near your home
>They had amnesia and didn’t know where they came from
>You obviously took photos and since then Bon Bon can no longer make fun of your beliefs
>You also took them to Princess Twilight’s castle, and after some investigations (which judging by what they said, mostly involved taking toenail samples
>Thanks to the generosity of Celestia, they were relocated in Appleloosa, sharing a home and eventually dedicating themselves to sell hay burgers
>It seems this letter was written by someone who had yet to learn how to use a pen

DEARB LIRA

WEL WRITING YOU BECOS WE H--What Anonfilly is trying to say is that our friend Anonymous has caught a strange disease. Doctors couldn’t tell us what is it and we’re afraid he’s about to lose his life. Lyra, Anon himself asked to see you and say goodbye to you, our friend who helped us when we came to this place, in case his end is nigh. Hope you can travel soon.

Love,

Enigma and Anonfilly.

>You start worrying
>You tell Bon Bon you need to go to Appleloosa
>You pack some things and take the last evening train
>You talk a bit with Berry Punch, who is sitting next to you until you finally fall asleep
>You wake up at dawn
>”It seems we’re approaching Appleloosa, I see more and more stands selling dust powder”, she says
>Suddenly the trains stops violently and you barely avoid getting expelled from your seat
>All the passengers get nervous and start speculating on what could have happened
>A couple of ponies and you dare triggering the emergency button to open the door and see a truck in the middle of the rail with its driver looking absolutely drunk

>>30812500
>The machinist gets off the train and starts yelling at the truck driver
>”Are you insane?! You could have killed us all!”
>”Whose wife is this?”
“Oh dear… he's absolutely wasted”
>Berry Punch stares at the incident behind you and comments “And judging by the smell he’s been drinking wine that isn't even one year old… what a pleb”
>You approach the machinist to get an explanation
>”I see you’re not from here… This is basically Flim & Flam doing their thing again”
“What you mean?”
>”Ask the locals, I’m a bit busy over here”, says the machinist while igniting a flame thrower, blowing the drunk pony’s hair in the process
>You decide to complete the route by foot

>You eventually find the outer world trio’s home
>You knock on the door and are soon greeted by sad-looking Enigma and Anonfilly
>”Thanks for coming, Lyra, we’re glad you’re here”, says Enigma
>You enter the house and let the owners take you to ANon’s bedroom, where he rests in the dark
“So, you couldn’t you find out what’s Anonymous’s illness?”
>”Oh, poor Anon! He got sick just when he was healthy!”, says Anonfilly
“Can you tell me what his symptoms are?”
>”How could this have happened?! Anonymous was a great person with so much to give to this world!”, says Enigma while sobbing
“I feel terrible too but can you tell me what wrong with him?!”, you say quite annoyed
>”Oh Anonymous, please don’t leave us!”, says cries Enigma
“Okay, that’s it”
>You go to the living room and lift the TV with your magic
>“No, no, no, please not the TV, if you break it we’ll have to talk to each other”, begs Anonfilly
>You hear Anon jumping out of the bed and going to the living room to beg mercy
>”Please, everything but the TV!”
“Explain yourself, Anon!”

>>30812508
>”Okay, okay… the thing is, we lied to make you come here because we need help with something”
>”And frankly, nopony seems to want to help us”, says Enigma
>You decide to leave the Ponysonic-branded TV on its place
“It better be a good reason to make me come here with lies”
>”Well… you know Flim and Flam?”, asks Anonymous
“Of course I do, they would kill their mother for a bit or two”
>”Well, the thing is… The three of us own a business”
“Oh?”
>”Yes, Hay & Co. And we proudly sell Equestria’s best hay burgers!”, says Enigma with enthusiasm
>”I make the secret mayo on my own!”, Anonfilly claims
>”The problem is that since Flim and Flam have come to Applelooza, they not only established a burger joint to compete with us, they also have been boycotting us in every way imaginable. Let alone the fact they are way more advanced than us”
>”Enigma’s right, they even have a sauce which is half mayo and half mustard. How the hell do they do it?!”, says Anon
“Wait a minute, what you mean with ‘boycotting you’”?
>Suddenly you hear a loud crash taking alll of you by surprise, and even making Anonfilly jumpscare into Enigma’s hands
>”No, qué pasó, qué pasó, vamos ay…”, says Enigma in some unknown dialect
>”It came from the garage!”
>You all run toward the garage while trying to overcome the fear

>What you find, however, is quite unnerving: a truck (looking suspiciously similar to the one that caused the train accident) is crashed against the garage’s door
>You see the driver trying to get out of the lorry… and you realize it’s the same guy from the train accident
“Not him again”...
>Anonymous furiously grabs the trucker from his shirt and threatens to punch him
>”What the hell are you doing? You were sent by Flim & Flam, right?!”
“Can you wake me up at 11 and bring me the breakfast to bed?”, says the driver before passing out
>”See, Lyra?! They’re trying to destroy us!”

>>30812512
>”Oh, look who’s here, the Weirdo Family”, says a horse standing next to another who looks the same… and yes, it didn’t take you much time to realize they’re Flim & Flam
>”I don’t think we’ve met before, ma’am. Let me introduce us”, says Flim while grabbing a business card and throwing it to the wind - it mysteriously flies to you, and when you catch it with your hooves you get to read what it says:

FLIM & FLAM
BURGERPOL
(BY CELESTIA, WHAT A BURGER!!!!) CO. LTD.

>”Customer-directed business cards. I take you don’t have any at your Fail & Co., right friends?”, taunts Flim
>”Now if you excuse us, we’re going to celebrate a business deal we’re about to close with a 20-years old Tardonnay”, says Flam
>”Eh, it’s Chardonnay”, corrects Enigma while Anonfilly notices Anon’s face veins are about to explode
>”You can pronounce it, we can buy it”
>The duo leaves the scene, leaving the family devastated
>”Dear God, what are we gonna do?!”
“Well, you could start by calling the authorities”
>”As in, Sheriff Silverstar? We tried to ask him to help us, but he told me they’re busy and will work on it when they solve all the crimes and stuff”