Princess Applejack

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Here is full archive of the stories in condensed, easy-to-read form with all chatter in-between removed.
Check out the pastebin here:
http://pastebin.com/u/PrincessApplejack

Curious what happened last time?
Check out the previous thread here:>>30647809

You are completely new and have no idea what is going on? There is a wikia with an overview of all characters, a complete timeline, previous thread recaps and explanation of the various concepts used in these stories!
Check it out here:http://princess-aj.wikia.com/wiki/Princess_Applejack_Wiki

Confused about when a character first showed up or who they are? Want to know when an arc started? Check out character notes and details here :
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1PsMAwLcIdC3IYxezAV9Ko4neEguNvc3eQqQqiTCxdDs/edit#gid=2119378650
Check out the 'Princess Applejack: Re-Cut Edition' here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/15cv3kqExr_vOM0JkUh4dqnvVKxJ5Z-P1KHwE8Z7aG0k/edit?usp=sharing

Are you interested in the dark side of these threads?
Check out our collection of NSFW stories here:
http://pastebin.com/u/NSFT_NotSafeForTwo_

And above all else, enjoy your stay at /paj/!

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First for Gypsy Pie!

FIRST FOR CHRYSALIS

EQUESTRIA NEEDS YOU BEST QUEEN!

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First... For... Sexy Hooves... Yeah.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tQARCB9wKto

>>30699493
Noooooo!

Fucking Captcha freezing on "next!"

>>30699493
>Seven seconds
NAAAAANI!?

>>30699493
>>30699495
>>30699498
Freaking first pileups

>>30699514
H-he's fast!

>>30699465
>Thread 208! And someone just couldn't wait!

Awww, pshaw! I keep telling you, it's not as terrible as it seems. Even I want to at least soon reach that point where EVERY character is not tied up with anything for once

>>30699551
Don't take that to mean you personally, I just needed something to rhyme with Eight and since she woke up it kinda set itself up.

OOCO
>AJ
"Celestia"
~~~

>Tia? Gotta question.

"And I have so many ways I could kill you. Why don't I? What's holding me back? What am I waiting for? Every night I stay awake and wonder, why?"

>Because you'd have ta' do the paperwork yer'self.

"Oh, right."

>Anyway, mah' question is, why'd ya' wait so long to establish relationships with the Yaks? Apparently they've been around more than a hundred years or so, what took so long?

"Honestly? I kept waiting for the previous leaders to die when negotiation failed, and then I just tried again with the next generation. Always ended up the same way."

>Seriously?

"Oh yes, same with the Maretonians and the Saddle Arabians. Previous ones? Complete nutjobs, the Saddle Arabians in particular were nuts! So I waited for them to die, then I just approached their offsping, talked again and eventually I got it right!"

>So instead of consistent dialog with them, you just stopped after one near miss and waited an entire generation to even try again?

"It was honestly much easier. And less time consuming!"

>We wasted lifetimes waiting for diplomacy and it's all yer' fault!

"I know."

>And!?

"And they're dead, and no matter how much they screamed their countries would burn before they traded with us, I won."

>Oh.

"Like. A. Princess."

BACKFLIP
FLIPS OFF WITH WING
SPLASH

>Ya' know what Ah' deserved that one.

Sooo... about 13's and 29's side plots...

>>30699584
13s is still going, it's tied up into the Equestria happenings. We'll have to wait and see for 29.

>>30699593
>Equestria happenings
Do I even want to know...?

>>30699498
So. Damn. Sexy. Give those hooves an academy award!

>>30699596
KKA did the subplot(or at least someone near identical to his writing) with that, so it's not a matter if you want to know, but rather you won't know until you know because fucker is like a raccoon locked in an oil drum, you might guess which limb he's going for but more than likely he'll take you by surprise by tearing off your face.

>>30699596
You know, Pennydrop, talking, blue waking up, preparing for a fight...

>>30699613
>KKA's persona is a lumberjack-sized man with a grizzled beard living in an oil drum who paints his face to look like a raccoon's
...someone draw him already

>>30699583
Immortality Hax for the win!

>>30699643
With a tiny AJ toy. Can't forget the AJ toy.

>>30699623
When will there ever be a time when shit ISN'T blowing up in Equestria, goddamit?!

>>30699653
Right now.

Did you miss the last few stories? AJ shut down Pennydrop's villain rambling like a motherfucking BOSS. Next up is blue, mark my words.

>>30699653
Nothing's blowing up yet, AJ talked down both Chitty and now Pennydrop.

Based Apple.

>>30699695
If she manages to talk down Blue, I'll take a long vacation from this thread... because I'd be SO. DONE.

>>30699719
Because how could you possibly top that?

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Pinkie Preview Prophecies

>Applejack spoils movies.
>Pinkie isn't hiding headwear in my mane, silly!
>Twilight kept something hidden in her book and it wasn't what we thought.
>Celestia finds out some hardened criminals have stolen a shipment of viagra.
>Luna heard AUJack was talking smack about mahjong and didn't think that she could hear it!
>Cadence has been reading mango.
>The Crusaders should have brought more bits to bribe.
>Princess fanservice!

>>30699814
God damn it. I still messed it up. It's-
>Pinkie isn't hiding headwear in her mane, silly!

>>30699826
We understand you, silly old ponk

>>30699584
I PROMISE I will finish 29s thing. I swear to fucking god this feels like it's trying to kill me sometimes, but I have to get it done.

>>30700129
Break!The! Curse

>>30700129
We believed!

>>30699583
This is classic thread 1 mindfuckery, Celestia being one parts lazy yet still brilliant of just waiting for all her foes to die and then swooping in is the perfect fridge horror.

Bravo.

>>30699492
I just noticed we had exactly 8 NSF2 stories. Huh. You'd figure we'd be up to ten by now at least...

>>30699583
That was fucking amazing, Clap-Clap-Clap!

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>>30700932
Well, 9 Technically. My dragon dildo story still hasn't been put in.

>>30700971
Huh. We might need a new NSF2 maintainer. Also, that means we're one shy of ten! Yay!

>>30701008
>Also, that means we're one shy of ten! Yay!
Was this a subtle hint at FluttershyXDomShy?

>>30700971
Done and done.

>>30701008
>We might need a new NSF2 maintainer.
Naah. I am just like a janitor who never has to clean up anything and thus sits in the broom closet, reading the dirty mags kids left laying around.

>>30701050
>Not DomShy x Zephyr Breeze
Boo.

>FS
~~~

BOOM!

>Oh dear.

CRUNCH.

>Excuse me.

CLANG

>Pardon please.

WANG.

>Hee hee.

BADAM

>Oh, where did the manual say that thing was?

CRACKABOOM

>Was it over left?

BUH-CLANG!

>No, it had to be right.

TINK TINK TINK!

>Is that a flying tank? That’s not fair. I demand you be fair, I only have the one airship.

WUNK!

>That is not how guns are used!

BONK!

You’re supposed to shoot missiles!

REEENNNGGH

>Oh where did you even get a spear!?

TONK

>Ha! Didn’t work!

SHUNK!

>Oh no!

CRIIKKKCCC

>Oh dear oh dear where is the off button!? If we run out of Onomatopoeia we’re doomed! We’re almost at the bottom of the barrel!

SHAKKA KAW!

>OH NO LIKE THAT! That’s the bottom!

CRROOBBBAAA!

>HELP!

>>30702065
>>Not DomShy x Zephyr Breeze
One part of me wants to say "No." but the other part of me would love to see Fluttershy keep interrupting/stopping DomShy's attempts at seducing their own Brother.

>>30702441
Would it be more or less creepy if it was Zep trying to seduce her?

>>30702511
That depends, if he's trying to just get with her or with both. If it's both, uber extra creepy, if it's just DomShy, just slightly more creepy. He can make the argument that she's not REALLY his sister but if he's going after both... yeah uber extra creepy.

>>30702519
Well clearly in this scenario it would be JUST Domshy, otherwise where's the comedy in FS trying to stop it and numerous technicality arguments?

>>30702521
Your telling me you can't see the comedic value of Zephyr constantly getting beat up/spray-bottled/yelled at/etc. every time he gets close to DomShy and attempts to pull a Johnny by Fluttershy?

>>30702561
I'm saying that's exactly the comedy, but if he's going after both FS and DS as suggested, then it's not as funny because there's no unsettling ambiguity in the creepy. FS smacking him down for creeping on her isn't the same as her smacking him down for hitting on Not-Her-but-still.

>>30702583
Oh, well all I was doing was answering for the creep factor, not the comedy factor. >>30702511

If you had said funny instead of creepy I wouldn't have suggested this >>30702519 in the first place. Don't add hidden criteria ya dingus!

>>30702712
But that second one you quoted isn't adding criteria, it's changing the scenario from Domshy seducing Zephyr to the other way around. It's a role reversal, not tacking something on to the OG!

>>30702712
... we might be overthinking this, you and I.

>>30702734
Uhhhggg...It's changing the scenario, yes, but it's asking for creep factor, not comedy. Pay attention!

>>30702741
I feel like we end up doing this alot actually.

>>30702889
>I feel like we end up doing this alot actually.

We literally started the thread overthinking the show.

We know who we attract.

>>30702907
Like minds think alike... and bicker like children about which superhero is better. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

>Pinkie
“Fluttershy”
‘Domshy’
~~

>…you guys feel like we’re missing something?

“Yes.”

‘Obviously.’

>…being aware-

“’Sucks.’”

>SA
“AJ”
‘AUJ’
~Twilight~
~~~~

>Alright soldiers, brief break and then we’re moving back out!

“Easy fer’ you to say. Don’t see you…”

>…

“Retracted.”

~Applejack I swear to Faust if I have to call Luna about dreams again because he’s embarrassed to cry-~

‘Ah’ can do it instead if you want.’

>I do not want you in my dreams, or anyone in my dreams, thank you. I am not embarrassed to cry!

‘You should be.’

~Over the line!~

‘Ah’m just saying. If you’re going to cry every time someone mentions wings, any parties with a Pegasus are gonna be really awkward.’

~Fair enough.~

>Hey!

~I’m still on your side, and I’m agreeing with your previous assentation that you shouldn’t be embarrassed to cry! But I mean, as far as being courteous goes…~

>I can’t tell if this is a subtle betrayal or not.

~I’d never betray you! I’d betray her first!~

“Hey!”

~Other you.~

‘Not better!’

~It absolutely is.~

“Can we get back ta’ flyin’? Harder to hear with the wind up there.”

>What? No it isn’t.

~Yeah, we talk while flying all the time.~

‘…come to think of it, how do we talk with all that wind?’

>…

“…”

‘…

~…Most illogical.~

>>30703168
>SA
“AJ”
‘AUJ’
~Twilight~
~~~

>We’re ordering nachos.

“Fritters!”

‘A salad!’

~HAYBURGERS!~

>Nachos I said!

“Overruled! By the power vested in me by mah’ country, Ah’ do declare, fritters!”

>We are outside of Equestrian territory, you have no power here!

‘How!?’

>What do you mean, how? Celestia never officially declared this section Equestrian land.

~It’s true!~

“‘Dang it Celestia!’”

>So, with that power, NACHOS!

‘None of us want that!’

>Twili, back me up. I am playing the brother card!

~And I, your faaavorite little sister, want hayburgers. I want them, Shiny, can’t we get them, pweeeese?~

>…hayburgers.

“YOU SPINELESS DOG!”

‘Heh.’

“Other me! Back me up here!”

‘Fritters are bad for you.’

“So’s hayburgers!”

‘So back me up.’

“Ah’ do not want to fly hundreds of miles to eat the dang thing Ah’ grow on mah’ farm!”

‘Well Ah’ want salads.’

“NOOOOO!

>WAIT!

“…”

‘…’

~…~

>We’re adults, why don’t we just go and get our own food and meet up in the park?

“…That makes sense.”

‘Yeah, what, do we need to hold hooves to eat?’

~You’re still getting hayburgers with me. I have dreams of ordering with you and you will make them reality.~

>Huh… seems this is the sitcom plot that never really made sense.

>>30703239
Im digging this pairing!

NC
>Celestia
“Luna”
~~

>…They’re gonna hurry, right?

“What?”

>It just feels like this is the moment they super need to hurry.

“We’re sure they are expediting as fast as could be.”

>Right, right…

“…”

>You think they’ll bring me something back?

“Knowing the white one, he’ll bring you back a cake that he will one day cash in for sexual favors.”

>Is that all? Honestly with the tab he has, I’d probably end up giving him your room at this rate.

“…with us inside?”

>Well no, where’s he going to cash in the se-

“RETRACTED!”

>Don’t play with the big girls if you don’t want to hear the screams.

>>30703356
I'm liking it, but they haven't quite found their stride yet.

>Guard
“Guard 2”
~~

>….

“…pffft-“

>Don’t laugh.

“SNNNKKKK.”

>Doooon’t.

“…”

>…

“…he looks like one of those children on a leash-“

>PFFFFF-

>”AHHHH AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

>SA
“AJ”
‘AUJ’
~Twilight~
~~~

>Alright, does anyone know where we are?

"Nope."

'Nnnnnope.'

~Nuh uh.~

>Uh huh.

"Seems that all of us kinda lost our, what'cha call it, aerial positioning?"

'Pigeons get this right. PIGEONS.'

~Actually that species of pigeon has been extinct for-~

'BIRDS!'

"Ah' mean, it ain't surprisin'. How much long range flyin' do most of us actually do?"

'Ah' barely leave mah' office.'

~I flew from Canterlot to Ponyville that one time. It was neat.~

>...

"See? Clearly, should have brought a map."

~I had a map, you destroyed it-~

"'AH' DON'T NEED NO STINKIN' MAPS!''

>...

~...~

"That's the Granny side of us. Not our mom's side."

'We think.'

"Honestly we don't know what our mom's side of the family is like."

'She's... probably not related to Granny, right?'

>...

~...~

"We can never speak of this again."

>>30703865
>They still don't know

Ahhhh, the pre-episode life. Before we cried ourselves to sleep at night in sadness.

>>30703239
>“YOU SPINELESS DOG!”
>'Heh

Wow AUJ...

>Pennydrop
"Guard"
~~~~

>Dumb bumpkin princess. Stepping all over my hooves and pretending she gives a shit!

The mechanical mockery of Chitania's likeness stomps through the castle, its grumbling occupant making sure that the stomps were strong enough to let everyone know she's in a mood, but not enough to shake the castle.

"Hey, wait!"

Mid-stomp, Pennydrop pauses for a moment before glancing over her shoulder at an approaching guard and the two robots accompanying her. She turns to face them, letting out an irritated sigh.

>Look. If you're here to bust me for a noise violation or something-

The pony's eyes widen.

"What? No! I just wanted to catch you before you left."

>...Oh.

Pennydrop's posture relaxes, difficult to tell what with the machine she inhabits lacking the subtle nuances of flesh and blood, and she clears her throat.

>Well, you caught me. What's next?

"Can I take a picture with you?"

>...Really?

"Yeah! You're like, I dunno, some sort of Power Mare with your big Mega Zoid and going around punching bad guys and that shit's pretty cool and\, I dunno, I really admire someone who can build that sorta stuff."

Pennydrop chuckles, genuine mirth brought out by a tickling of pride.

>A fan, huh? Well, sure. I've got a few minutes to spare.

The guardmare smiles before turning to one of her bots.

"Gladius, you take the first few shots and then Disco can take the last."
1/2

>>30704070
The bot nods as the mare and its 'sibling' pose with Pennydrop. A few of the shots place the mare and one of the bots by Mecha-Chitania's side, while one has the mare on top of a bot, their height evening out with Mecha Chitania's as the mare wrapped a hoof around its neck.
It wasn't all that time consuming, maybe five minutes at most, and the mare and her bots went back to their patrol or whatever business they had to attend to shortly after. Still, it was nice; that feeling of admiration for her... for her work... for what she's done.

And for what she's going to keep doing: building, advancing, perfecting.

Protecting.

Because, for all their talk, this was still a mess the Princesses let get out of hand, proving once again that their long rule over Equestria was nothing more than a fluke born not of merit, but of genetics, nepotism, and dumb luck.

Equestria needs someone like her to even the playing field between mortals and the incompetent half-gods that reign over them... But... she has her own 'gods' to deal with, ones that made it clear to her that she should play nice with the half-gods, lest she be stripped of everything her position entitles her to.

>'Gods', a pissed off roach, and a bunch of moneygrubbing fuckwits in suits... Dealing with this shit isn't gonna be easy.

>>30704080
How.. weirdly chill of a moment.

I like it.

>>30704080
Aj's right, he BASE of her idea is sound, she's just a nutcase.

>>30704080
>I'M GONNA SAVE THE WORLD JUST LIKE MY LAOTIAN CLAYMATION SHOWS AHAHAHAHAHAHAH
"Hey"
>Wait wha-OHH SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT
[dies]

There, I summarised PD's entire arc from here on out

>>30704080
>>'Gods', a pissed off roach, and a bunch of moneygrubbing fuckwits in suits... Dealing with this shit isn't gonna be easy.

You are like two out of three of those...

>>30704167
>dies

Pppfffftttt

>SA
“AJ”
‘AUJ’
~Twilight~
~~~

>I would like to remind everyone to keep their hooves above the waistline, I'm a married stallion.

"Iffin' Ah' wanted to cop a feel, Ah'd have done it when ya'll were in mah' bathroom two days ago."

'Hm?'

~He does that a lot.~

>I feel like we should get to flying first, then have some sort of misunderstanding about all the times I ended up in Applejack's shower.

'Really?'

"Ah' agree, but yer' the one who started it by implyin' that the mare who helped scrub off stains from yer' dang whitey coat would go for the cheap shot."

'Oh.'

~Applejack washed my brother in her private bathroom alone, it's not that complicated.~

'Uh...'

>That's not true!

'Ah, Ah' see, ya'-'

>Celestia was there too.

'...oh buck-a-tree no.'

>What?

'CROSSIN' THE LINE, LITTLE PONY!'

>...

"..."

'Let's just start flying.'

~Annnnd, repressed.~

Hum. I need to know something about a very specific technicality concerning MechaChitania for a story point... but who do I ask about that? Schmoe, or KKA?

>>30704546
Like, internals? I think both know what's up, they apparently workshopped together. Schmoe never posted an email, but KKA's is keikaku at protonmail dot com. He spoils it, I respect that shit. and I'm assuming there's a way to contact Joe through that, send it along.

>>30704546
Message received and replied!

>>30704559
Thanks for telling him!

>>30704546
>>30704760
Aw fuck what now!?

>Celestia
"Luna"
~~~

>OF ALL THE MOTHERHUGGING SUN BLAZING SKIN ROTTING BUG ZAPPING HOLE DRILLING EYEBALL SHRINKING HAIR ROASTING-

"Thou art being a touch dramatic."

>UNRELIABLE RENEGADE FLYING CRAZY HEADING-

"That makes her sound cool... stop it."

>PIECE OF BLACKEND CAKE BUUUUUUGGGGGGGG!

"Oh my! Sister! Such language!'

>WHERE THE FUCK DID CHRYSALIS GO!?

"SISTER!"

>WHAAAAT!?

"He won't tell you if you keep choking him!"

>...

"..."

The changeling in her grasp gurgled.

>Yes he will.

"Put him down!"

>AJ
„AUJ“
'SA'
(Twi)
~~~

Over the course of their relatively brief journey it became readily apparent to all three of them that flying in a tight formation with the shared weight of an adult stallion between them was something an aerial special force was more suited for, instead of three princesses who had never done this kind of thing before. It was around that same time they began to recognize the indistinct outline of the mountain range trapping Hoofington Valley in its midst from all sides that they also became aware of an all-new phenomenon they could easily see even from the great distance they still had to cross to their destination Both out of the need to speak without having to scream over the whipping winds and to shake off the growing unease even the most battle-weary of them felt in the pit of her stomach, they moved so close together the tips of their majestic wings almost touched.

>Y'all seein' that?

The soft-spoken question that sounded uncertain to every one of them was met with a derisive scoff from the off-worlder princess.

“That bright light shining across the entirety of that mountain ahead of us is hard to miss. Especially if you consider it's all clouds overhead and yet, it's as bright as if it wasn't and there's a full moon out.”

The faint, purplish glow that had illuminated the face of the youngest alicorn among them for but a moment dimmed away, revealing an expression that was part consternation, part worry.

'What's wrong, Twilight?'

The purple princess shook her head, lifting her hoof and biting into the edge of itit fretfully. It was an old habit, which Shining Armor recognized from a time when everything in his sister's life was centered around Princess Celestia.

(We, uhm, we should hurry. I am going to explain once we land. Just be prepared for everything, okay?)


1 / 2

>>30705030


Said statement was met with worried looks from all around, followed by the the entire procession speeding with significantly without a word. The cold, white peaks of the mountaintop grew nearer, chilly winds whipping past the flying quartet feeling sharper and icier than ever and making them wish they could huddle closer together. Closer and closer, the windy, snow-covered peaks of the mountains came, the beautiful, snowy expanse untouched by hoof or claw dipping up in an increasingly sharp incline as they ascended towards the skies.

“What in...”

A brief moment before they crested the mountain-range, they could see it. A massive shaft of electric-blue like, piercing the sky and illuminating the clouds from below like a super-powered signal light. Then the vast expanse of the valley, what little remained of the ruins of Hoofington and the multi-layered, shimmering dome of shields cast by more than one royal pony stretched out before them.

>TARNATION!

If the destroyed valley, flattened city and signs of destruction as far as the eye could see hadn't shocked the two, identical mares, who hadn't seen ground zero for themselves yet, enough to make it feel like a bucket of ice cubes dropping into the pit of their stomach...

...it was the broiling, bubbling soup of raw, primordial power that resembled a soap bubble consisting of the contents of a kicked-over wastebucket of oil paints bulging outwards from the partially submerged remains of Hoofington.

'Okay, real talk. Am I the only one to think we are way out of our league heeeeeeeee-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!'

The startled shriek the stallion echoed across the the mountain range as all three alicorn princesses tucked their wings tightly against their sides and dive-bombed down towards the clearly endangered groups of Guards on the ground and Thunderbolts up in the air circling the anomaly, causing him to trail and whip behind them like a kite lost in a rainstorm.

>>30705044
And, right off, small mistake: Wonderbolts, not Thunderbolts. Sorry!

>>30705044
NO STAKES HERE

NOTHING TO SEE, FOLKS

CONTINUE WITH YOUR COMEDIC FUNSIES STORIES

>>30705044
WHELP

THIS'LL END WELL

>>30705044
>was the broiling, bubbling soup of raw, primordial power that resembled a soap bubble consisting of the contents of a kicked-over wastebucket of oil paints bulging outwards from the partially submerged remains of Hoofington.
Haaappy story time...

>>30705055
>>30705063
>>30705089
...Challenge time!

If you can come up with stories of the quartet of royals interacting in an amusing way with the Guards, Wonderbolts and all the TRAGEDY from the Fall of Evo arc, I promise I am going to go about this as light-heartedly as possible. Which I would've done anyways, but I don't want you guys to sit on the edge of your seats, waiting for the worst possible outcome. I mean, c'mon, I promise. Right?

>>30705044
Wait I thought Hoofington was in a desert?

>>30705143
Challenge accepted! Wait-and-see$

Schmoe here! Messages received and replied!

>>30705173
Dunno! But, hey, the Kilimanjaro in the sveltering African steppes is a snow-covered mountain too. Those options are not mutually exclusive!

But yeah, maybe we should triangulate in roughly what part of Equestria Hoofington is?

>SA
"AJ"
'AUJ'
~Twilight~
(Guards)
{Wonderbolts}
~~~

>ATTENNNSHION!

Not a single one of the panicking screaming ponies gave him any attention, even though he had clearly asked for just that. So rude.

>...Little sister help.

She called forth her magic into a bright shining light above her head and shot a pure lavender laser beam into the sky.

(AHHHH!)

It made things worse, so much worse.

>Really?

~It was the first thing that came to my mind.~

>I'm spanking you when we get home.

"Alright now! LISTEN HERE YA'LL, OR AH'M GONNA HOG TIE EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU!"

The threat was as empty as her response, she very well knew that any rope going in there was either coming out shredded or with a suffocated hung pony on the end. She couldn't bear to see that happen, she liked her rope.

'And tap.'

With a single hoof to the ground, the world itself shook and came alive. While it did nothing to calm them down, the sudden grasping hold of every single one of their hooves in a none too gentle hold of earth did keep them from running anymore. They weren't calm ponies, but they were still and that was good enough, just like any good parent.

>Thank you, Alterjack.

'S'what Ah' do.'

She had a strange smile on her face as she readjusted her glasses.

>Alright! So! As you all can see-

{WE'RE ALL GONNA DIIIIEEEEEE!}

>Not that! You cannot see that, because you cannot see the future. Are you a fortune teller? Obviously not, otherwise you'd tell me how a Hooves and Hearts Four ends.

In any other instance, an uncomfortable silence would have followed. This time there was just uninterested panicking and whimpering, because they had stuff to do. Screaming stuff.

"What now?"

>My wife is a fan. Anyway! As you are not a future see'er-

~Seer?~

>I just got that. You're not one of those, you don't know if we're going to die, or if my big brained, brilliant, wonderful, world saving-

"Layin' it on there thick Shinin'."

>-TEAM-

"Retracted, go with mah' blessin'."

1/3

>>30705387

>-can save the world yet again after all the other times they saved the world!

Not all of them had calmed down, just like not all of the had gone over to listening to the unbeatable banter of Fuzzy and the Buzz, but he would make believers of them yet.

>Now, we're going to be calm, we're going to be cool, and we're going to look damn fine doing it. You see this?

The other three mares beside him needed no instruction, when a stallion wills them to strike a pose, they know.

>We look damn good. Do we not!?

{DAMN FINE SIR!}

>Thank you, miss in the back, your point has been made and you and your fellow guards and bolts panting like a dog is no longer necessary!

It absolutely was.

>Now, I know what you're thinking, we're literally right next to a tomb and said tomb is currently looking like a giant bubble infused with death. As a connoisseur of bubbles myself, this is especially disturbing. But we must not give up! Because we, are the guards of Eqeustria! We are the ones who hold the line when that line is besieged by giant glowing things of pure death! We are the ones who look to the apocalypse, and tell it not today! YOU!

His hoof swung right to the light. It, in turn, sat there glowing menacingly or benignly, glowing beams of light were unpredictable like that.

>Not today! See? I did it, and I'm not dead.

It was important to note everyone sans the three moved away from him at that point.

>You, likewise, shall not be dead! Because we are going to figure it out with my sisters massive, powerful, and amazing brain!

~Awwww!~

"Hey!"

>And Applejack having the sense to actually not break everything like I do all the time!

"...thanks."

>And this Applejack is here too!

'Hi?'

>And I... shall bring the bubbles. Are you still afraid!?

({VERY!})

>But are you going to run!?

{(SIR NO SIR!)}

2/3

>>30705397


>Then get your well toned, athletic asses into formation and set up a perimeter!... Far, farrr away from this thing, because I'm not sure what glowing radiation does and frankly neither should you! Get into position and I don't mean the one that conceived you!

{(SIR YES SIR!)}

>MOVE OUT!

With a salute and the song of Equestria singing in their hearts, everyone flew or ran or teleported as far away as they could from that thing while still making it look professional.

>I've never been more proud.

Someone had to start the slow clop.

>I thank you.

'No no, thank you.'

>Now that that's settled.

With a stern glare, he looked right at that glowing bubble that made a mockery of his powers and their amazing ability to bring wonder. The bastard would pay. He would make it pay.

>It's time... to settle this.

By running behind his little sister and pushing her in it's direction, like the proud big brother he was.

>Twilight go fix it.

~Really?~

>I just talk pretty, you do the smart stuff.

She wasn't going to deny that, he talked very pretty.

>Applejack go make sure she doesn't do anything nonsensical.

~HEY!~

"Iffin' yer' tryin' to look good, it's workin'."

>Other Applejack go be angry at it, you're good at that.

'Is that there a compliment?'

>Yes.

She would believe that there was a bridge in Canterlot if he'd said it with that tone. There was, but like with a lot of him it was likely smaller than presented.

~Alright... let's save the world.~

They were the best shot anyone had, and they would give it all they had.

~Applejack, give me my equipment.~

"Wait, was Ah' supposed to be carrying that one?"

~...shoot.~

Equestria was still probably doomed.

>Wonderbolt 1
"Wonderbolt 2"
'Wonderbolt 3'
~~~~

>Wow, those are some REALLY pretty colors down there.

"You're telling me? Look at all that blue light around us!"

'Uh, guys, maybe we SHOULDN'T hover inside the weird, magical deathray of whatever is down there...?'

>Pshaw, stop your pussyfooting. What's the worst that could happen!

'Magical Cancer.'

>Besides that!

'Ubermindcontrol.'

>Bsides THAT!

'...'

>See, nothing to it. Live a little!

'Well, yeah, we'll be living very little if we stay here.'

"Oh, hey, is that the princess coming down the mountain?"

>It is. And, hey, not just one, but three of them.

"They are... screaming, I think. And heading right for us."

>Huh... perhaps it has something with us hovering in the weird, magical deathray from the thing below us.

'YA THINK?!'

>>30705400
Simply.
Beautiful.

>>30705400
>>Twilight go fix it.

It's been too long since I had a laughing fit this hard. Thank you, /pa/, you made my day.

>>30705387
>The threat was as empty as her response, she very well knew that any rope going in there was either coming out shredded or with a suffocated hung pony on the end. She couldn't bear to see that happen, she liked her rope.

Most of this was gold, but this one in particular slayed me

>Fuzzy
“Buzz’
~~~~

>Annnnnddd COMING AT YOU LIVE, IT’S FUZZY AND THE BUZZ!

~Fuzzy and the Buzz late at night, 97.1!~
~Stay up and get down!~

“Newsflash: a strange shaft of light has been seen shooting up into the sky in the general vicinity of what was formerly known as Hoofington. Any official spokespony from Canterlot advises all citizens in the same area to not approach the valley under any circumstances.”

>Reminds me of the panic that set in some weeks back when people in Baltimare caught wind of Buzz coming to down for a visit.

“OHHHHHHHH!”

~I'm sorry, sir, but this place is off-limits.~

>While we are certain that a sight like that must be attracting folks from far and wide like moths to a flame, we still caution all of our listeners not to take any unnecessary risks and try to sneak past the perimeter the joint operation between Equestria and the Crystal Empire has set up.

“That kind of team-work has been unheard of since that time the native Zebras and Camels buried the hatchet and jointly banned everything Fuzzy from their countries.”

>OHHHHHH!

~I am not some sort of contraband you can prohibit, you know!~

“Stay tuned as this story develops! In the meantime, enjoy the rocking tunes of Moose's newest hit single, STARLIGHT!

>HIT IT!

>>30705500
>Fuzzy and the Buzz too

My day is complete.

>>30705400
>>30705402
>>30705500
God I love this place.

>>30705539
Endless despair? Ha ha! No. We laugh

>>30705400
My one regret is that shining stole the spotlight, but damn did he do it in a glorious way.

>>30705063
Surprisingly? It did!

>Guard
"Wonderbolt"
~~~

>...do you have an erection right now?

"I'm a mare."

>Soooo-

"So you're goddamn right I have an erection."

>>30705294
Aaaaand... replied. (It was in the Junk Mail Folder, can you believe it?!)

File: 1333648.png (2MB, 1088x5474px) Image search: [Google]

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This General in a Nutshell.

>>30705817
If I ever learned KKA shitposted about mobile posters, I'd be heartbroken.

>>30705838
The joke is that everyone wants him to do that, but he is making giant fights happen instead.

>>30705846
....shit that is the thread.

>>30705713
REPLIED HAVING BESTOWED THE SECRET KNOWLEDGE!

And actually yes, the same happened to me with KKA once.

>>30705605
He is head guard right now...

Replies, replies all around! That means you too KKA.

>>30706131
Achieved! Thank you very much!

>>30706186
You are most welcome!

File: Pinkie.png (68KB, 566x424px) Image search: [Google]

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KKA! Look upon your mail!

>>30706318
Wait is this Schmoe or Pinkie using Schmoeponk?

If it's the former, replied and I've still got my email up and will keep it up for tonight so we don't need to keep eating posts, reply sent! If it's PP anon, I didn't get the email, checked my spam too.

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>>30706376
It's me, I made these for PPA since he was using those Ponks with a similar style. And I agree!

>>30706489
Okay, that is a cute Pinkie.

Go night threae

>>30707091
Well, someone is getting topped off early

>>30707388
A bit of the old fire in my cereal, and I'm ready for the day.

Morning thread!

>>30706677
Damn right it is!

well all that talk yesterday doesn't make me think something horrible going to happen, no. Not at all.

Well that episode sucked.

I don't even want to write am NC about it.

File: 1429015128183.jpg (102KB, 562x749px) Image search: [Google]

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>The Sweet Apple Admirers
A.R.A?

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I can't believe the madmen did it. An absolutely savage ribbing. The girls lost the battle, but won where it counts.

>>30710417
Honestly it's not that bad, just forced, but I think the big issue that's going to stand out is that our meta comedy is kinda the opposite of this episodes. We point out flaws and make whole scenes about making fun of them or explaining them comedically, this just kinda... stated them? Like the "Twilight was better before her wings" comment. They didn't really make a joke about that. All in all, it's just there? Like if you didn't see the fandom, half these aren't even jokes. They're just statements.

Guess /pa/ kind of spoiled us. When flaws come up, usually we've got a whole scene to fill it or make fun of it.

>>30710785
Meh, they didn't have the time for that, just one of our scenes would have taken up 2 minutes, that's 10% of the show right there. Yeah, it wasn't very clever and a lot of the humor was just stating brony tropes and hoping that was funny enough, but it was what it was.

Not the worst, just a subpar episode that didn't really bring the laughs.

>New promo shows Nulings can still shapeshift

FUCKING FINALLY

>>30710503
They wanted to be family.

Which.. is a very subtle joke if true.

>>30711062
Hopefully that episode will give us a much more detailed look at their powers, so we can actually start discussing if you want to implement them in in what ways.

>SA
"AJ"
'AUJ'
~Twilight~
~~~~

>It looks like my Ice Cream Of the Gods.

"What?"

~OH MY GOSH IT DOES!~

"What!?"

>I mean I see chocolate chips in there, it's one to one.

"What in tarnation are you goin' off on!?"

~His ICOTG.~

>It's mine.

"Ah' don't know what that means!"

~Take a free sample from every single solitary ice cream flavor.~

>Put it in a single bowl.

~Mix it.~

>Almost die of sugar poisoning.

~Go to the hospital with a smile.~

"...that's the dumbest thing Ah've ever heard!"

'Huh... but it didn't leave out the mango-nut, you're allergic to that.'

>Meh, it might be banana nut...

"..."

~...~

'...What?'

>>30711471
Confirmed, she poisoned him.

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>>30706318
>>30706489
I love it and saved for later use! Into the wiki when?

>>30706489
Is that a muffin in her drink?

Oh, Pinkie!

>>30711836
Sorry, I went drinking last night and still am a little bit out of it. Didn't even check last nights posts.

>>30706318
>>30706489
INTO THE WIKI IT GOES!

>>30711836
I made these for you ages ago man!

>>30711914
Isn't she just amazing?

>>30711914
About time!

>AJ
„AUJ“
~~~

On the precipice of a small cliff overlooking the southern edge of what once used to be a bustling, industrious city sat two mares who looked so identical, they may have been mistaken for twins. Forced to scoot so close that their perfectly matching cutiemarks touched like two stamps pressed into one-another, their sizable hindquarters flattening a little, they yet didn't seem uncomfortable with the other's presence. For though they may have their differences, they still were one and the same mare.

“I don't even know where to start on this one.”

The companionable silence they had shared while watching Twilight flit around the outer perimeter of the massive bubble-shield has been broken, and within an instant, Applejack found herself scrunching her face up in mild annoyance.

>Then don't? Ain't nothin' ta say ah haven't beaten mahself up over plenty yet.

“We both know I can't do that. You and the rest of your group of royal stooges clearly need someone to point out the obvious flaws in your thinking.”

An awkward silence followed, for all intents and purpose not long enough to Applejack#s liking.

>...so that's how that feels. Can't say ah like it.”

“It's about to get worse. Mind telling me exactly why you thought it would be advisable to establish a massive industrial and commercial hub so far from Canterlot that due to thesupervision being practically nil, one of the worst menaces to Equestrian society could take over with none of you noticing? Because back over in my Equestria, this place here is a completely abandoned natural reserve. There used to be some settlers, but the got spooked by Diamond Dogs, who in turn just up and vanished one day.”

>Disconcerting, given what's clearly waiting to get out down there.


1 / 3

>>30712043

Both of them gazed at the spectacle below. Despite the utter calm and silence of what appeared to be a magical calamity of so far unseen proportions, Twilight didn't seem mind getting so close she was practically playing helter-skelter all over the multi-layered shield keeping it inside.

She seemed to be having a lot of fun, too, despite the gravity of the situation.

“Rest assured that it will be one of the first and foremost things I will be looking into once I get back to my own ship. Right after asking Twilight to encapsulate a certain glacier in permanent stasis. And now stop dodging the question and answer: how did you not see this happen?”

>Tsk...Ya won't like the answer.

“I am never going to like any answer you give me, but here I am, pressing on because I want to give you, and myself, the benefit of doubt.”

>Mighty kind of ya.

“So far, you never failed to disappoint us both.”

The sigh the escaped the slightly deflating princess was long-suffering and much-needed.

>Ah think none of us had a clue it had grown this big while we weren't looking. None of us caught on. It just happened.

“In the span of half a year. Without any questions on why the taxation within this area, for it to be a legal operation, must have easily multiplied a thousandfold.”

>It is how it is, ahm afraid.

A stunned silence followed, during which a rueful smile caused the corners of the transdimensional princess' lips to curl upwards.

>Yer taking that surprisin-

Shove.

>Ah.

The light nudge against Applejack's back wasn't rough enough to hurt her...

>WHAT THE FFFFFFffffuuuu...

….but it sufficed in making her slip of the edge cliff to plummet towards the bubbling ocean of magical sludge below.


2 / 3

>>30712062

Alterjack closed her eyes, an expression of utter serenity on her face as she imagined a dull splash coming from below, thus ending the source of her greatest headache in this warped version of her own reality. Her eyebrows knit together when instead, she heard a string of surprisingly vile curses and stomping hooves making their way back up the overlook towards her.

'Did... did you just try to do what I think you did?'

She didn't need to open her eyes to know Shining Armor was standing some ways behind her, with a utterly dumbfounded look.

“I am awfully sorry you had to see that. The severity of my growing depression is so great that, for but a weak moment, I honestly believed suicide was the only option.”

>AH GONNA TAN YER HIDE SO RAW THEY'RE GONNA CALL YA BLACKLEJACK FROM NOW ON!

“And continuing an on-going trend, I failed miserably.”

'...uuuh... huh... I'm... I'm just going to take a step back to see how Twily is doing.'

“You go do tha-OOF!”

'You two have fun.'

>THERE CAN ONLY BE OOOOOOOOOONE!

Despite his intention being avoiding the two duking it for a while, Prince Shining Armor remained for just a while longer after one apple princess collided into the other, making them both tumble into a dirtpuddle.

He firmly told himself that he was watching the two wrestle in the mud for a few minutes after that just to make sure no one was hurt, and not because it was probably the most provocative thing he'd seen either Applejack ever do.

>>30712078
That ending was fucking glorious, and I liked the characterization, but-

>Without any questions on why the taxation within this area, for it to be a legal operation, must have easily multiplied a thousandfold.”

What did she mean by this? They knew why, Evo Corp, and they knew who was in charge of it, the former heads of multiple gangs that laundered their money to keep it clean so they weren't seen as illegal entities, and they knew why they started out there, antenna testing.

I mean Sunset bent over backwards to make this look legit.

>>30712078
Oh Shiny, stop pretending. We all know.

>>30712078
Damn, AUJ. Over the line!

>>30712154
>What did she mean by this?
Think from AUJ's OCD-like point of view for a moment here. Everything happening in and around Equeatria is always under her personal immediate scrutiny. A Megacorp appearing out of nowhere with sketchy founding members and uncleary sources of income building strange towers no one csn exolain how they work would likely have made AUJ do an impromptu inspection or at least figure ot the tech

>They knew why.
The princesses did, and while the suddeness pf it was jarring, it seemed plausible to them. The the servea to highlight that AUJ Is likely micromanaging her wntire country... and with her sudden departure, imagine what the state of affairs is now.

>>30712224
Ah, that makes more sense, didn't get that from AJ's reaction of it but now that you put it that way it seems more plausible AUJ would be baffled nobody could possibly miss that with how thoroughly she controls everything, while Applejack would just be happy that(Seemingly) nothing criminal was going on and the city was booming again.

There's probably a debate about government reach in here...

>>30712224
Jesus Christ man put down the bottle.

We are only saying this because we love you, and we are worried about you! There was a #up there! #!

>>30712402
COMEDY WAITS FOR NOBODY, NOT EVEN GRAMMAR!

>>30712418
You are tearing me apart, Cuddler!

>>30712224
>and with her sudden departure, imagine what the state of affairs is now.
We'll probably never get to send her home at this rate.

>>30712078
NC
>AJ
“AUJ”
~~

“How’d you possibly miss this!?”

>What’cha mean? They signed off on everything, they had legal means of how they got the funds-turns out one of ‘em was an art collector or owned a Laundromat or something-and it’s not like any drugs or illegal weapons were coming out of the city, we made sure of that. Sure, the imported in advanced technology and minerals, but… well they’re a technology company, they’d do that. Ah’ mean from the surface it all made sense.

“Ah’d have looked over every expense report and raided it at least once.”

>That’s terrible!

“…’

>Ah’ mean technically you would have stopped Armageddon, sure, but… uh…

“…”

>Lemme get back to you on this one.

>>30712782
NC
>AJ
“???”
~~~~~

>What, do ya’ want us to be commies or somethin’?

“I think that’s a greeeaaaat idea!”

>…Who said that?

“All of Equestria. All of them. Also we want no more cutie marks.”

>…Is that a purple mane behind that rock?

“NO! IT IS THE FUTURE!”

>Who are you?

“The real main character!”

>Leave.

“NEVER!”

Wait, what was the name of the Appleass admirers group again?

Okay, everybody! Added a new tab to the bottom of

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1PsMAwLcIdC3IYxezAV9Ko4neEguNvc3eQqQqiTCxdDs/edit#gid=2119378650

called 'Where is everbody?'. I sorted in the most simplictic, easy-to-use way, allowing everyone wanting to write, those wondering where certain characters went or those curious who would be affected by events in certain places to quickly look it up... or move them, if needed.

I hope this helps all of you writers wanting to use different characters!

It's far from done, and I have to add what everyone is doing exactly as well as look up who I am missing still (there's a lot. The list hasn't been update ina while), but for tonight, I am too exhausted to continue.

Hail Apple!

>>30712948
>“The real main character!”
Pffft, Chrysalis doesn't have a purple mane

>>30713049
Praise you, friend!

>>30713049
Rest and take it easy, /pa/l, your work is not in vain.

Cook yourself an apple pie, you deserve it.

>>30713049
As always, we appreciate the work of you and our archivers.

Cheers, /pa/l.

>Celestia
“Luna”
~~~

>Luna! We need Chrysalis, now! We can supercharge her enough to fight that thing if it gets loose!

“What does thou want me to do about it?’

>Find her, with magic! Dream magic!

“That would require her to be asleep.”

>…Do daydreams work?

“They do not. Also, that would require her doing nothing and daydreaming. Thou art wrong on so many levels.”

>Then fly up really high and look for a black spot!

“That would require her to be standing still and for us to have no black ponies, so unless there is a ban on black ponies in Equestria we are not aware of…”

>…what?

“…”

>Don’t you even dare.

>>30712986
Apple Rump Appreciation, A.R.A, I think. Might be wrong but I know it’s ARA.

>Rarity
“Dash”
~~

>THEY RAN OFF WITHOUT TELLING US!?

“Ice cold. Ice. Cold.”

>How dare they!

“I mean I don’t know what I could have done, but I could fly fast at it. Really fast. I could fly the fastest at it, you don’t even know.”

>I… I’m going to give them such an earful!

“Yeah, me too. Only I’m going to do it faster.”

>We deserve to be there!

“You could figure out… patterns? Yeah! Dresses have patterns, you could figure out the patterns in it just like one of my sci-fi movies, and then you’ll discover it’s weak point and-‘

>And a hotheaded daredevil with a chip on her shoulder is going to dramatically fly in at the peak moment just before the world gets destroyed with the disruption weapon-

“-then BOOOM there’s a massive flash of light and you’re sitting there on the commincator!”

>And wait.. and wait… but what’s that in the sky!? GASP! She’s alive!

“And the day is saved!’

>See, that’ certainly would have worked.

“Their fault for not inviting us.”

>What fools.

“…You need a drink?”

>Little one.

>>30713496
Cute!

THEY ARE CUTE

OOCO
>SA
“Spike”
~~~~

SLAM!

>GAH!

“Poppers!”

>Holy shit is that what that’s like!?

“POPPERS!”

>I… I don’t know what you mean-

“POOOOPPPPEERRRS!”

>GAHHH!

TACKLE!

>SPIKE! Stop this! Stop this now!

“I need it in my moooutthh!”

>I know! I understand, trust me I do! Chrysalis does the same thing all the time, but you can’t let yourself become this! You’re better than this!

“No I’m not!”

>…Well, I guess you win on that one-GAH!

“GIMME GIMME GIMMEE!”

>Stop bouncing!

“GIMME GIMME GIMMMEEEE!”

>…actually I kinda like it.

“GIMME!”

>Fine, jeeze!

~~~~~

>…

“…”

Whhhummmwhummmmwhummmm.

>…

“…”

Whuuuummmmmmmmmm.

>…

“…so what the fuck is that?“

>Twilight called it a microwave.

“Ah.”

WHuuuuuummmmmmmm.

“Taking a looong time.”

>Yep.

“...”

>…

WhuuuummmmmDING!

“POOOPPPERRSS!”

CRUNCH!

“MIINNNNEEE!”

SLAM!

>…Well at least he waited until I finished.

>>30713750
Did Spike just rape Shiny?

>>30713847
Wouldn't you?

>Pommel
“Potsticker”
‘Lightning Dust’
~~~~

>OH FUCK!

“OH FUUUUUCK!”

‘Those assholes!’

>…

“…’

‘I told them to tell me when something happened. Soarin’ went on this biiiiig tirade about how I’d totally be the first to know, but nooooooo! He just was full of shit like he always was!’

>…

“…”

‘I mean, he went into detail! He said if that thing farted I’d be the first to know, and I have the fastest fliers too, not like he has any excuses! This is complete and total bullshit! I was promised knowledge! I was promised!’

>…

“…”

‘Fuck that guy!’

>…

“…can we-“

>Not illegal.

“For the love of the Moons.”

>You mean moon, right?

“…”

>Huh.

‘BULLLSHHIIIIITTT!’

>>30713049
Thank you!

>>30714178
>Soarin’
“Fleetfoot”
~~~

>…

“…she’s going to blame us for actually telling our leaders first instead of her, isn’t she-“

>Fucking obviously she is.

>>30713847
To be fair he was into it.

>>30713049
HAIL BASED APPLE

>>30714178
>“For the love of the Moons.”
>>You mean moon, right?

Somewhere, 56 just let out a "PRAISE IT!"

>>30715372
>Praise the Suuuuuuuun!

"Praise the Mooooooooooon!"

-Praise the Aaaaaaapples!-

+SHUUUUUT UP!+

>Screw yooooooou Twilight!

"Yeah! You're just upset no one praises yooooooooou!"

-Aaaaaaaapples!-

[Rarararararara!]

+SHINY!?+

[Sorry Twilyyyyy! Whities need to stick togetheeeeeer!]

>>30715514
~Someone's gonna praise me, right?~

...

~OH COME ON! MY BIG BLACK BOOTY IS WORTH PRAISING!~

...

>WELL FUCK YOU TOO!

>>30712695
Or at least when we do, it'll all be on fire.

>>30716009
In that is best case scenario. If things go really wrong, she's going to come back to the place completely took an over and now under evil Rule, and they will like it

Night Guys

>>30716436
or worse, she comes home and Apple Bloom is married to a pair or something

>>30717082
Good morning my friend

>>30718066
And a top of the morning to you

>>30717581
Applebloom Harem End!?

Well that pair better be the CMC or we're going to run out of males in ponyville!

>AJ
"AUJ"
~~~~~

>Ya' know, this kinda feels unfair.

"Ain't mah' fault Ah'm taller, you aren't eating right."

>You are not.

"Ah'm discounting the hat."

>Never. Ever. Discount the hat.

"We have a closet of-"

>No we do not!... Ahem, what Ah' mean is, when you get home, you essentially get to avoid all of this, ain't really fair when you think about it.

"Well, you could've avoided all of this by monitoring your friends every move and makin' sure none of this happened, sooooo..."

>..when you say monitorin'-

"Ah' have cameras everywhere."

>That's... horrible.

"Mah' world ain't about to end, soooo...'

>You sure about that? Ah' mean, most of your stuff is unguarded, right?

"..."

>...

"...Twilight better hurry her ass up and get me home..."

>>30715514
OOCO
>56
"29"
~~

>CUZ! I need to know how to rate booty!

"This is the first time you've talked to me all week. Verily doth I feel as an elder would as the chicks leave the nest."

>Hey! Don't be sexist, cuz! They aren't chicks, they're MARES!

"Mine clarification would be lost on thee."

>Yep, cause I ain't listening! Help me rate booty!

"Fine. Let's look at the shape, size and spring and-"

>Done! My system is perfect, thanks cuz!

ZOOM!

"...I'm helping."

>>30719075
Meanwhile, her Twilight is shitfaced drink and partying hard

>>30719519
NC
>AUTWI
"AUJ"
~~~

>WOOOO! NEVER COMING BACK! NEVER COMING BACK! NEEEVER COMING BACK! FUCK YOU BITCH FOR WHAT YOU DID TO MY BBBFF! AHHHHAHAHAHAAH!

~~~~

"...Ya' know Ah' might'a burned the wrong bridge tellin' this Twilight off."

>>30719640
NC
>Twilight
"AUJ"
~~~

>...why are you bringing me cake?

"That's what all princesses like, isn't it? It's a rule?"

>I decently like it, not enough to sway me.

"Oh.'

>But there iiiissss something I'd like instead?

"..."

>...

"...are ya' gonna tell me?"

>No, you have to guess.

"..."

>I eat them allllll the time.

"...'

>I loooooooveeee them.

"...F-fritters?"

>You don't know me at all!

>Lucky Strikes
“Haymaker”
‘Steam Guage’
~~~

>GUARDS! ASSEMBLE!

“AT ATTENTION!”

‘READY TO GO!’

>Alright everyone! We’re going to protect Equestria, you ready?

“How?”

>Come again?

‘He’s asking how we’re gonna do that. I mean, I don’t have anything.”

“I’m an earth pony, I just have a spear.”

>…aim for the eyes!

“What if it doesn’t have eyes?”

>Stick it in the asshole!

‘What!?’

>Son, there is one constant in this world. If it eats, it has an asshole. If it has an asshole, you can stab it. Aim for the brown star for maximum damage!

“…Wow.”

>MOVE OUT!

>>30719856
... this logic isn't that far off.

OOCO
>SA
“AJ”
‘Celestia’
~~~

>Well one of us clearly has to change-

“You.”

‘Absolutely you.’

>I advise the more democratic method-

“You.”

‘You. You’s have it.’

>-would be unfair. So instead let’s draw straws!

“Or you.”

‘I say you.’

“It’s a pretty smart stance to have.”

>Or, we could try to guess a number!

“Two, because it rhymes with you.”

‘That sounds like the proper answer.’

>Aha! Let’s just-

“’Yooooooouuuuuuuu.’”

>FINE.

With a harrumph, he turned up his nose, and strutted out.

>But I’m keeping the costume!

His oversized war-armor that easily tripled his girth and height made it hard to make it through the door, but eventually he managed.

“Thank goodness”

‘Yeah.’

Both smiled, and readjusted their own heavy war armor.

“That would have been embarrassing.”

‘But there’s still the matter of us looking the same…’

A look, a pause, and then they hefted up their massive axes.

“’FOR GLORY!”’

>>30720282
Okay the sexy role play has gotten out of control.

>>30720489
>Implying they won't go deeper

It's just the start.

File: 1016681__safe_solo_cute_cloud_sleeping_g1_artist-colon-johnjoseco_g1+to+g4_firefly_zzz.png (803KB, 1280x1200px) Image search: [Google]

803KB, 1280x1200px

Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Cadence"
'DT'
[Rainbow Dash]
~~~~
[The battle rages on as we continue trying to take on this behemonth of an airship. I could probably take it down with a good Rainboom, but then my cover would be blown. Thankfully, these pink ponies are well prepared for a fight and very willing to defend their territory.]

'HAHAHAHAHA!'
DT continues peppering the airship with her AA gun.

~In the air~
"Keep Mr. Plane steady, Pinkie!"
Cadence is aiming down her bow, while standing on the wing of the biplane.
"BLAST ARROW!"
She fires her arrow into the airship's rudder.
*KABOOM*

Pinkie's senses tingle as more missiles fly towards them.
>Hang on! We're in for some chop!
She turns Mr. Plane to dodge.

~On the ground~
[They're maniacs...and it's pretty freaking awesome.]

'You know, this isn't the first time I destroyed an airship. You just got to know where their sweet spot is. Like this!'
She fires into the mid section and causes it to explode. A cabin section breaks apart and falls. RD slides the tank out of the way while debris crashes to the ground.

[Random question, but does this tank have rocket boosters or something?]

'Yeah it's the red button. It'll pretty much fly us up...Why don't you give it a push?'

[Weeeeeell, if you're offering.]
She pushes the button causing the tank to launch itself straight into the air...

'[Wooooohooooo]'
RD spots Fluttershy outside the airship as they go up.

[Fluttershy?]
The tank crashes into the airship and it finds itself in a corridor. RD climbs out Mr. Tank.
'How dare you abandon your post newbie! Desertion in the face of the enemy brands you as a traitor among your pink sisters!'

RD flies out of the hole.
[I saw Fluttershyyyyyy!]

'Oh. If it's about the couch her timing is pretty bad. Sorry Mr. Tank, I guess we're parting ways for now. I've got some C4 to plant.'

>>30720679
>Knows FS is there
>Still wants to plant some C4
What the fuck Diamond Tiara!?

>>30720756
Do not fuck with the pinks

>>30720756
Fluttershy is outside of the airship.
DT is inside the airship she plans to blow up.
Pretty sure, Fluttershy is in a safer place than DT is.

>AJ
"AUJ"
~~~~

It was chilling, the longer she looked out into it. The swirling majesty of magic that both seemed stable, yet ready to burst at any moment. Had it not been for the fact that it seemed calm, the princess likely would have chosen a distance far beyond it's sight out of nothing less than sheer self preservation.

Yet she could not leave, she could not look away.

>Damn it, Sunset... what did you do.

She could not leave her mistake that shined a light up to remind the world there had been a failure, her failure.

"It would've been impressive if it wasn't so horrible. Kind of shocking Sunset was capable of something like this, she always seemed so... easy, back home."

The shame rippled through the one who belonged in this world, just as the curiosity rippled through the visitor from another.

"Ah' wonder if Ah' should keep a better handle on her-"

>Don't.

The sharp words cut through that, and with it the building ideal that was so easily pushed aside in the other mares' head.

>Don't push her like that. She will push back, and it won't be pretty.

"You're making it sound like Ah' should just strike first, and strike hardest."

>Ah' am not! What is wrong with you!?

The other mare shrugged, not a care in the world for the horrified look on the other ponies face.

"Worked out so far for me, not so well for you."

>She hasn't done anything wrong in your world!

"That Ah' know about."

Disgusted, she could not look to herself anymore.

"Keep your hat on, Ah'm never gonna be the one to take out someone for a chance. Ah'll wait till she makes a wrong move first, obviously."

>Yer' so sure she will?

"Evidence is mounting on it, yeah."

The pony hissed in barely kept anger, even though her eyes never left the swirling mass before her.

Never in her life had she more wanted to see her own face staring back at her, bruised, broken and bloody.

"...Ah'm sorry for your loss."

1/2

>>30721153

At least, until the sudden shock made it so she couldn't imagine much of anything, much less something so dark.

>What?

"Ah' said, Ah'm sorry for your loss. It's never easy when you lose someone close to you... it ain't easy when it's their fault either, and you couldn't stop them no matter how hard you tried."

Softly, the princess took her place next to her doppleganger. For once, the pony from that world did not wish to push her away.

"Sometimes, ponies don't want to be helped. They need to be, but they just won't accept it when you try to give it to them, or it's not fast enough or right enough. They have their own ideas about what they have to prove, who they have to be, what they have to be... and you can't stop 'em. You can try, ya' can give it all ya' got and then somethin' more still till yer' apple red in the face tryin' just ta' figure out what they want, but it ain't on you ta' fix them. Even if ya' think it's yer' doin' that ought ta' wrangle 'em in, ya' just gotta accept that sometimes, they're just gonna march right down that path no matter what'cha do. Ah'm sorry ya' had ta' go through that, it wasn't fair ta' you... and it ain't your fault."

Had the shield below not given a hum of power and broken it, nothing short of a deafening silence would have followed.

>...thanks.

"Don't mention it. No, seriously, don't mention it, if you tell anyone I tried to say something wasn't your fault, I will deny it up and down. It's always your fault."

She never said a word.

She just smiled.

"Fifty bits your Twilight can't fix this, but mine could."

>Pretty dark of a bet to make.

"Too much for you?"

>...Your on.

Somethings had changed.

Some things, would always stay the same.

>>30721161
He's dead. Shining is dead.

How can he be anything but dead?

>>30721185
She might mean Cadance...

>>30721161
Awwwww, but this has such terrible implications

>>30721185
I'm having fun trying to figure out what else it means.

I'm seeing all sorts of crazy shit

>Lightning Dust
"Soarin"
'Fleetfoot'
~~~~~

>YOU BOTH ARE SO...

"I think she just realized she can't fire us for telling them first."

'You see that? That's smoke. There's smoke coming out of her ears.'

"Heeeere it comes."

>...BATHROOM DUTY!

"Shit."

>LITERALLY!

'Ahhhaaa, sometimes you're fun.'

>>30721466
NC
>AUJ
"???"
~~

>Why won't you let me help you!? Don't you see Ah' just want what's best for you!? Don't you know Ah' just want to be happy? Stop pushin' me away!

"Cuz, Ah'm not gay, Ah' told you."

>Ah' guess Ah' just can't help some ponies...

>>30721841
>Braeburn
>Not gay

That is actually probably true but not as funny

>Twilight
"Shining"
~~~

>...

"...soooo, what does that button do?"

>Not now, Shiny.

"Right, right."

>...But what does it do?

"It turns up the radiance detector, Shiny."

>Ahhhhh, I see.

"...'

>What's Radiance?

"It's the amount of light it's emitting."

>That sounds important.

"It is, so please let me work."

>Can do!

"..."

>...what about that button?

"It's the same button."

>I'm pointing to the other side of the board though.

"I wasn't looking."

>Ah.

"..."

>...

"..."

>...oh.

"Let me work, Shining."

>...

"..."

>...I'm helping.

"Yes, Shiny, you're a big helper."

>Heee.

>>30722061
Little sisters. Way more mature than you. But despite you being a huge doofus, they still love you.

>>30721161
>She slipped back into her accent again

Hrrmmmm

>>30722325
I mean it's obvious that her accent is a forced thing for herself, she's not doing it naturally and the more emotional she gets the harder it is to keep up.

>>30720815
NC
>DT
~~~

>There, now Fluttershy will be blasted away, but not killed! This will work out great.

Beep. Beep.

>...wait-

BOOM!

>Twi
„AJ“
'AUJ'
-SA-
~~~~

Three mares and one stallion, each wielding the royalty-given power to decide the fate of a country for woe or weal, sat together in a small circle near the edge of the faintly humming shields that kept whatever lurked beneath Hoofington contained.

Or so they hoped, at least. After a whole day of field studies, the most scientifically and magically-inclined of their small lot was to answer that question for them. One way or another.

>Right, everyone's accounted for and ready to listen?

The other three nodded mutely, pensive looks etched onto their faces.

>Good. So. First the good news: with the use of of what little equipment we unintentionally brought-

At that point, she shot a sharp glare into the direction where her farmer-gone-princess friend sat. Said mare jerked her head around sharply, seemingly finding a great interest in the sky overhead while humming to herself as if she didn't feel spoken to.

>-and all the potentially helpful spells I could remember off the top of my head -which I want to insist are many, but by far not as many as I would have been able to use had SOMEPONY not forgotten my belongings back in Canterlot -

The humming ascended to very sharp and warbling whistling of a mismatched tune, the nervous looking apple princess trying her hardest not to acknowledge how hard her best friend was trying to burn holes into the back of her head with by glaring at it.

>- I can surmise with some certainty that there is absolutely no new danger or need to act since the last time I gave everything around here a passing look.

The sigh the other three had been holding in escaped their collective lips, their previously tense postures slumping in visible relief. Undeterred, Twilight lifted her hoof like a teacher about to make a vital argument about a lecture they were holding.


1 / ?

>>30722839

>At least none I can even begin to understand, due to it refusing to obey the fundamental laws of physics as I know them.

The two identical mares and her brother looked up sharply, clearly alarmed by this revelation.

-What do you mean? Could it get out even though the shields are in place, Twily?-

The question was met with a sharp headshake.

>No, no, none of that. Uuuhm... how do I put this in simple laypony's terms...

It merely took her looking at the collection of vials, books and scribbled notes she had used in her brief study of the light and everything below it a bit to find the proper words.

>Whatever happened when part of the ruined city disappeared was an event that left subliminal traces of magical radiation in the entire valley. I have taken soil, water and biomatter samples with what few vials I brought, but I am going to need all of my equipment and access to the library in my lab to make sense of what exactly happened.

“Can ya at least wager a guess?”

After speaking up without prompt Applejack turned to look at her doppelganger. At first, the other princes looked baffled. Then she began grinning ferally, crossing her forelegs over her chest while looking back her. Something unspoken went on between the two of them, which prompted Shining Armor and Twilight to look and blink at each other in confusion. Applejack turned her attention back to her friend an instant later.

“Ah mean, you are the smartest pony I know, Twilight, bar none. There oughta be some kinda idea or theory y'all have.”

Normally the most stern, prim and proper of their lot, it still didn't take much for Twilight to be affected by such obvious flattery. A hint of color graced her cheeks, and while she was busy being flustered, the other Applejack just shook her head and snorted.


2 / ?

>>30722846

>W-well...! If … if I were to make a guess based on what evidence I have gathered so far, which in no way or form should be taken as a definitive statement... I'd say that there was some sort of supermassive discharge. It must've passed the shields and contaminated the the entire valley in a radially expanding shockwave in a way similar to what an explosion would have.

That, at the very least, prompted the princes of the Crystal Empire to stand up onto all fours with a jerk, his eyes wide.

-It has gotten out already?!-

Before he could start running off, casting spells or shouting in alarm, Twilight stepped in and laid a conciliatory hoof onto his back, smiling in a way that caused him to relax. After a few moment of getting his breathing back under control, he seemed to be ready to listen again, and so she continued

>I would have said something if that were the case. Have some faith in me, okay?

With an embarrassed cough the stallion nodded, sat back down and gestured for his sister to continue.

>Maybe it tried to get out. Maybe it was just a side-effect of the unknown entity reacting to the shields. But whatever EXACTLY happened, Discord... or what is left of him... seems to have stopped it.

Countless questions raced through Alterjack's mind in that instant. From the way she pursed her lips while her eyes flicked left and right, all of them could see it. But instead of voicing her concerns, the methodical mare focused on the here and now and just asked one, single question that burned on all of their minds.

'How.'

>Probably the same way he contained it beneath Hoofington when he confronted it. We can't really speak to him anymore I'm afraid, but due to my experience with him and the very special brand of 'particles' he leaves behind when he uses his powers I can safely surmise that he he stopped it from spreading just in time.


3 / ?

>>30722855

A fond look warred with one of sadness on the youngest Alicorn's face, her brother's gaze sweeping left and right, taking in his surroundings as if on the look-out for danger.

-None of the Guards on the ground or Wonderbolts in the air at the time said anything about such a thing happening. According to them, the ground tore up and light started shining out...-

>Hmm... well, from what I have been able to study I believe it's highly likely that everything happened on a plane that is completely unobservable to the naked eye of the common pony. See, that is why I need ALL of my equipment. I know this for certain because THAT!

With a huff, the princess pointed up at the sky and blue light clearly visible all around them.

>That big shaft of stupid, glowing light over there isn't actually *light* in the way any of us knows or has seen before.

Seeing blank looks all around, Twilight smiled awkwardly and scuffed her hoof at the dirt, then picked up a rock and tossed it over at the shields in visible annoyance. The rock bounced off wildly, not even causing a ripple across the powerful enchantment.

>Like how it doesn't cast any shadow. I tried using all manners of methods to impede the movement of the electromagnetic radiation that composes visible light as I know it. And you know what happened? None of it worked! It's as if despite being wavelength being in the visible spectrum, it completely ignores space and matter. Maybe even time! It just IS!

The purple alicorn threw her hooves up while sitting back down, looking partly excited and partly exasperated while those around her tried following her explanation as well as they could with their limited grasp of the science behind it.

Twilight suddenly thrusting her hoof up so sharply they all swore they heard a whiplash made them jump a little.

>Furthermore, it's going UP. Far, far further up than I dare to fly or would ask a seasoned flier to do.


4 / ?

>>30722866

With how tightly Applejack was scrunching up her face, it was readily apparent to everyone she was still trying to put that into a measurement or scope she could properly grasp.

“How far are we talkin' here? Like, Canterlot high? High as the clouds? Way up, like Cloudesdale?

The studied princess just shook her head to that, waving a hoof dismissively.

>It's going all the way through the Troposphere, Stratosphere and most likely Mesosphere as well. I can't tell with the means I have at my disposal here, but the way I see it? It may be going all the way up to the Thermosphere, where phenomenons such as an Aurora Borealis occurs. Or...

As she trailed off, the princess from another world picked up her train of thought, face grim.

'...beyond. Yer tryin' ta say that whatever that is, 's going right inta outer space.'

>Exactly! That's absolutely monumental and, to be frank, a little scary.

“Is it dangerous...?”

>Good question, Applejack. The answer is: I think it's Not. Not yet, at least. Strangely enough, it doesn't appear to do anything to its surroundings at all. Several ponies were immediately exposed to the light when it broke out, and yet, none of them show any signs of being any different from usual. Not even any symptoms of magical paradoxes that occur when you expose someone to huge amounts of magical energy. If there's an effect, it's not either meant to happen to living beings, it's long-term-effects have yet to manifest... or it's just beyond my grasp of the world beings like Discord and this thing hail from.

Everyone fell completely silent after that, trying to make sense of these developments and what they meant for them and the rest of the world. All four of the royal ponies had their own thoughts on the matter. Plans were formulating within their heads, little by little, each of them wildly different in their desired outcome.


5 / ?

>>30722872

It was Shining Armor who spoke up first, looking just a little distressed.

-That's not really comforting to know at all. It could be trying to do all sorts of things while we sit idle here..-

>Maybe. But clearly not in ways that seem to do anything I can make sense of just yet. The shields hold. Perfectly, if may add. The air in there must be very stale by now. There clearly is a massive presence down below, that much I was able to sense. It's really difficult to analyze properly, but I'd say it's currently dormant for some reason.

None of that sat well with any of them, and it showed.

“So what can we do?”

With careful, methodical movements, the purple alicorn began packing up the strewn-about samples, notes and belongings, tucking them away into a pair of saddlebags as she continued speaking with a serious look in her eyes.

>For the time being? Nothing. Even if you altered the thaumatical composition of the shields to block out sight or light, it would probably still continue right through. I need to run some tests in a safe environment, write up theories and do some calculations and consult with the princesses. Maybe then, we can make sense of it. For now, it seems to be safe and harmless for all intents and purposes. We still have ample time to take care of it in a coordinate fashion.

'We can't just leave.'

Twilight looked up after swinging the saddlebags onto her back with her magic, visibly perplexed by the sharpness of those words.

>We've been flying through all of the night, spent the entire morning calming down the guards followed by analyzing everything, cataloging statements and collecting samples. It's almost dusk, and unless you want to sleep out in the open or drop in on the makeshift encampments with the rest of the Guard, we should be making our way back by now, Applejack.


6 / ?

>>30722879

There was a strange intensity in Alterjack's as she stared the perfect mirror image of her friend down. Twilight seemed about ready to start an argument, when Applejack stepped into her line of sight with a sympathetic look in her eyes.

“Y'all are worried about Diamond Tiara.”

That caused both Twilight and her mirror self to look away from each other and focus on the mare between them. Twilight frowned, then dropped her gaze to the floor.

>There really is little to be done right now. I am not exactly happy with what happened, but I can't work with so little go by. I feel like I am wasting our time out here, trying to turn over every single stone individually. I need to get the bigger picture here so that nothing... horrible happens the instant I am not paying attention.

“And you don't want to let someone down like that ever again.”

Twilight looked up sharply at that. Where she had expected a judging look or a frown, she saw sympathy and regret etched onto her friend's face. A moment later, the stockier mare pressed into her, wrapped a hoof along her back and hugged her.

“'s absolutely fine, Twilight. Ah think we all understand if ya wanna go already. Yer the smartest one of us. Yer gonna figure it out, and we're gonna save the world. That's what ya do... and yer gonna help that filly get better with all yer might.”

The hug didn't last entirely enough for either of them, Twilight felt. But thus strengthened in her resolve, smiled smiled grimly and nodded, before casting a look at the others two in her entourage.

>What about you three? Are you planning on staying?

That prompted Applejack to cast a sideways look at her alter-ego, who just turned her head away, furrowed her eyebrows together and walked away without single word.


7 / 8

>>30722888


“Well, ah wanna figure out what exactly Sunset did here so we can figure out how she kept that thing in check.More importantly though, ahm not entirely sure about Other Me. Ah think ahm gonna quiz her a bit about her own circumstances now that we have a quiet moment to ourselves. There's something under the surface with her, itchin' ta get out like the worm outta the apple, and the last thing y'all need is another me goin' crazy, chasing shadows. Ahm stayin'.”

The tall, white shape of her brother stepping next to Applejack caused Twilight to look up with worry written all over her face.

>And you, big brother?

-Well, I was here in the aftermath and I spent some time figuring out the logistics surrounding Hoofington with Celestia. I can propably give Applejack and... uh... Applejack a few pointers in the right direction. Plus, I am the local expert on all things shields and guard duty! I need to make sure everything is order and that the Guards now what to do in our absence before I can head back home without feeling like I forgot something at every turn.-

Twilight could only shake her head, an amused smile at her brother's posturing on her lips.

>...always the last one to abandon the fort, huh?

-You know it, little sis!-

>Alright. Just... be careful, and promise don't do anything rash without consulting me first.


8 / 9

>>30722895

Hugs were passed around, goodbyes were said and within twenty minutes of that, both Applejacks and Shining Armor watched the slowly shrinking form of Twilight Sparkle disappear into the evening sky. None of them said a word, but they all felt a palpable tension now that they were left to their own devices. They all knew that this impromptu trip wasn't quite over for any of them just yet.

More importantly, Applejack knew that there was still much to do ahead of them on the front of understanding one-another. Perhaps, with some well-meaning tactfulness, she'd be able to find out more about how Equestria had turned out in her alternate self's world and thus learn from it.

-Hey, you never told me what I am like in your timeline, Otherjack!-

CLOP!

The pain she felt when her hoof meet her face with enough force to kick over a brewery-mule wasn't enough to make the pain in her soul go away any time soon.


~~~~

Writer's notes:

If anyone wanted to write DT waking up, here you go. Twilight's on her way back.

KKA? I swear to Lauren Faust, if you don't start checking your inbox more regularly, I am going to find out in which trashcan you sleep so I can eat your face and absorb your unholy powers into myself.

>>30722888
>That's what ya do... and yer gonna help that filly get better with all yer might.”

AJ I really do love ya but for the love of FUCK GET SOME PERSPECTIVE

SLIGHTLY BIGGER THINGS HERE THE FUCK

>>30722910
Deepest apologies! Response sent.

>>30722935
On the other hand thank God it's not waking up.

>>30722935
I am not sure what Applejack is thinking or feeling here, but I think she's trying to assure Twilight that she knows best what she's doing... and that her constantly being somewhere else with her thoughts is helping no one. Same reason why she is trying to have a minute alone with her other self.

Having second thoughts or being somewhere else with your head is what broke the A-Team's neck during their operation.

>>30722899
>More importantly, Applejack knew that there was still much to do ahead of them on the front of understanding one-another. Perhaps, with some well-meaning tactfulness, she'd be able to find out more about how Equestria had turned out in her alternate self's world and thus learn from it.

WHY
APPLEJACK THE LIGHT
THE LIGHT
PAY ATTENTION

>>30722899
I'm actually super interested in what that response is going to be.

>>30722967
I feel like this is a false calm. It's luring us into a sense of security and then it's just going to turn out everything is fucked and we could never gonna stop it

>>30722935
>SLIGHTLY BIGGER THINGS HERE THE FUCK

>>30723004
>APPLEJACK THE LIGHT
>PAY ATTENTION

And have her do... what? She has no clue what to do, just proposed they look around for anything that might help and her smartest friend just confessed that she has no idea what it does except for ABSOLUTELY NOTHING AT ALL.

>>30723038 here may be right. Blue may be doing something, but our heroes just can't see it.

>>30722899
I'm digging those back and forth with both AJ, but I'm wondering what her end goal is. What could be over in the universe that so important she would bring it up right now? What's the real thing she's after? I doubt she's deciding that now of all times she has to do all the answers, she must be looking for something, but what?

>>30723073
>And have her do... what?

Tell Twilight to focus on it, I guess? It's odd she's even implying DT is on the radar is all. I mean holy shit this thing is a giant bubbling soup now, even if Discord did pull it back that just means we're up another level than we were before, and running out of ladder! FOCUS!

>>30723097
That is the question... fuck, that fits but I still feel like I'm spouting off a meme.

Anyway, point still stands, AJs staring down literal Armageddon right now, and I doubt that AUJs ded Shiny is going to tell her how to put it back, what's the real thing she's after?

>>30723108
>FOCUS

Twilight isn't just going back for DT. I really think AJ just said that to put her mind at ease about even letting it distract her. Twlight clearly said she needs better equipment, her books and the princesses because that thing goes beyond her.

havign her stand around out there when Applejack forgot to bring her stuff is like asking a neuroscientist to continue studying when all you give him is a half-rotten brain while he's out on the ocean with just a silver spork, his pants and a lot of ideas, some of them bad, soem of them good.

>>30723097
...huuuuh... didn't the other Applejack turn up exactly when Blue became a thing? Only Sunset, Chitania and AUJ are privy to the circumstances of her arrival. Maybe Applejack is starting to see some connection or something?

After all, this is powerful, transdimensional magic. Their appearance could be linked!

>>30723127
Well, last time AUJ revealed a secret it turned out she had two alicorns worth of power stashed away, she might just be fed up with the secrets and wants to know what cards she holding if this thing gets out.

>>30723151
>didn't the other Applejack turn up exactly when Blue became a thing?

No, AUJ showed up over a week before the Sunset thing happened, and they learned from Lavan when that thing fell down in there. But!

>Only Sunset, Chitania and AUJ are privy to the circumstances of her arrival.

Chitty the DID reveal they fought before, that might be a warning sign that she and that thing are connected somehow.

>>30723159
By the power one of them used to tske the power of other alicorns, Applejack and Alterjack must fuse to become OMNIJACK, SLAYER OF FALSEHOODS AND FALSE GODS.

>>30723178
It's possible she's seeing how much AUJ remembers if her arrival and if she's just fucking around with her some more. Alterjack has mislead about a lot of stuff so far, that's a serious liability. She might just be putting her hoof down on this finally and telling her to fess up.

Or she's questioning something else that doesn't make sense, it is awfully convenient that she was the only one who could fix Chitty, and even with her full powers couldn't pull it off...

>>30723236
keikakupal is apparently involved so of course everything that has happened so far was leading up to this point

one of these days we will see one of his plans coming

>>30723151
>...huuuuh... didn't the other Applejack turn up exactly when Blue became a thing?

As mentioned, Lavan spelled it out for them when it showed up and everyone knows Sunset had it months in advance, Chitty spelled that out.

Also, I literally just, !JUST! realized that when Seven asked who found Blue, Sunset put all the credit on Chitty, and when AUJ asked how Chitty could plant a spell in her amulet, Chitty gave Sunset all the credit.

They'd be cute if one of them wasn't magicsoup.

>>30723291
>Chitty and Sunset vouching for how amazing the other is
Awww...

>They'd be cute if one of them wasn't magicsoup.
AAAAAAAAH herr herr herrr herrrrr, why must you remind meeeeeeheeeeheeeeee!

>>30723306
>These are the villains
>He's crying over the VILLAINS

HAH

>>30723479
>the villains whose lives are ACTUALLY at stake, friendships being genuine and hard earned and romantic potential feeling natural instead of forced
HAH indeed.

>>30723533
>>the villains whose lives are ACTUALLY at stake

Huh...

>Friendships being genuine and hard earned

...huh...

>romantic potential feeling natural instead of forced

Huhhh.

I want to make a snappy comeback but you're right, as far as we know Sunset's dead/Bluechow, she and Chitty were at each others throats before being friends, and they're the most substantial romantic subplot outside of a CE Crewmember. Even as much as we joke about Appleshiny it pales in comparison to them.

I know we wanted villains who were a cut above the show's mustache twirlers or one note nothings but I think we went above and beyond.

NC
>SA
"AUJ'
~~

>...

"..."

>...Oh god I walked out in that timeline, didn't I?

"W-what?"

>ADMIT IT! In that timeline instead of hiding in the bathroom like I knew I should, I rushed out to fight Nightmare Moon with a boner, didn't I!?

"Y....ya' what."

>WE ALL KNOW I HAD A BONER! Let's not play pretend like CHILDREN! In this timeline I made the right choice, and none of you got to see my big white Spear swinging low as I demanded the evil pony stop! This is the best timeline!

"...sure, we'll go with that.'

>Good. Nobody had to know of my boner.

"...So ya' know the guards can hear you right?"

>Most of them have seen it.

"...."

She starts shooting blood from her nose, and falls over.

>Wow, that happened back in the locker room too! I wonder if I've got a witch curse or something... damn it, I knew I should have called her back, leaving a mare named Dahk Magyic the morning after was a terrible idea!

>>30723533
>romantic potential feeling natural instead of forced

I'm gonna argue that because the succession of events to get to this point is insane

>>30723947
Yes, but the point was it was a natural progression. Well, as natural as you can get when something shoot you in the chest and kills you but brings you back to life as a zombie. As far as that goes it was completely natural.

>>30723756
>leaving a mare named Dahk Magyic the morning after was a terrible idea!

... can a certain mega bug time travel? I need to know this for reasons

>>30724531
... That is hard to answer... slightly. Just don't think about it and consider your reasons irrelevant... it'll be kinder in the long run.

I woke up from a freaking weird dream to write this down.

Rainbow Bridge to Faust called the Piefrost, one of the secret creations of the Pie family from way back when.

>>30722910
>If anyone wanted to write DT waking up, here you go. Twilight's on her way back
You do know you gotta stick the black goop into her to wake her up, right?

>>30723533
DELET THIS

WE'RE NOT BAD PROTAGONIST WRITERS

WE'RE NOT VILLAIN FAVOURITISTS


REEEEEE

>>30724997
Is it worth it for the fun?... I think it is

File: ^3C2EBD6384AC07F808ECDBD2270A8DE431449E053A3CEAB115^pimgpsh_fullsize_distr.png (293KB, 1868x1284px) Image search: [Google]

293KB, 1868x1284px

Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Cadence"
'DT'
[AJ]
~~~~
>Welcome to Late Night /pa/ with your hosts the Pink Pony Club! It's during this time that content doesn't matter, and neither does this since it's pre-recorded to help make a quota!

"I'm the pretty one <3"

'I'm the grumpy one.'

>And I'm the crazy one!

>"'Now for our main guest...APPLEJACK!!!'"

[Howdy.]

>Do you have good memory? A lot of your stories sound a little outrage-

[Boy howdy do Ah' have good memory. After cousin Peach suffered amnesia and lost all her memories for the 2nd time, Ah' basically had to retell her life's story again and again. Ah' got mighty good at it too.]

"How thoughtful!"

'Is that why you never seem to stop telling-'

[The key to having good memory is practice. All the practice Ah' got was from talking about cousin Peach which sharpened mah mind.]
AJ points to her head smirking.
[f y'all don't use that memory you end up tossin' the extra garbage. It's basically a matter of you use it or lose it. Which reminds me...did Ah' ever tell you the time cousin Peach forgot her accent? Some time after she lost the tip of her tongue tasting acid to find out whether it was actually as sour as they say, she-]

>Okay okay that's all the time we have right now, but don't worry we're not really going anywhere. You're just waking up.

"And the best part of waking up~"

'Are holsters for your guuuun~'

[Wait, acid actually-]
AJ wakes up.
[...taste like...well fine. Peach sacrificed herself for science, but Ah' can see how much y'all care.]

>>30724997
>Piefrost
Not gonna lie, I might have to borrow this for an entirely different thing some few years in the future.

>>30725814
... if we bring her into canon, she's just gonna be a stump.

>>30725208
>WE'RE NOT BAD PROTAGONIST WRITERS

... I mean we're not, AJ is now "Based Apple" apparently and Shinys only issue is that he's got such great chemistry we can't stop pairing him with others.

We're great at writing both, just not so great when we try to force pairings.

>>30725814
>After cousin Peach suffered amnesia and lost all her memories for the 2nd time, Ah' basically had to retell her life's story again and again.

Gasp!

Penny drop explained!

>Guard
“Guard 2”
~~~~

>Is it safe to stop panicking yet?

“It’s never safe to stop panicking around here.”

>…true.