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> Once a mere skinny man with no life, now a fully fledge pirate of any sea.
> His name was Gilbert, Gilbert.
> Gilbert lived an ordinary nerd life, played video games, watched porn.
> His day job was a cybersecurity analyst.
> By night, he was a pornographic analyst.
>One particular night, he took a job from a unknown man on the Pornhub fourn, his screen name was "Skinny Penis Dan".
>Skinny Penis asked Gilbert to hack some high quality BangBros content to watch. >Gilbert was offered 2,000 dollars for the job; who would reject such a offer for a hack on a porn site?
>Couldn't be HARD right? It's a porn site after all.
>But boy, Gilbert was wrong.
>It was the most hard job he has ever performed by his fingers.
>Gilbert usually has no problem performing hacks, but Bang Bros Banged Gilbert's top notch hacking skills.
>Gilbert didn't think Bang Bros would even have double protection on their firewall; but they did.
>After a nights of relentless constant brute force, Gilbert bound the characters he cracked together into a password of their Web Admin's account; it was "BangGod6969".
>After sending Skinny Penis Dan the password for the saved unreleased content, Skinny Penis Dan sent him a message..
>"I am a undercover FBI agent.
>You are under arrest for illegally hacking into a PORNSITE AND DISTRIBUTING UNRELEASED PORN."
>Soon swarms of black cars surrounded Gilbert's house.
>Gilby filled with determination and ANGER, SCREAMED INTO THE MONITOR AT SKINNY PENIS DAN: "YOU ARE FUCKING DEAD YOU PIECE OF SHIT RAT." Shortly after the rage inducing scream...
>Something odd happened.
>Out of no where a humanoid being with neon blue skin holding red disks of light appeared.
>>
>The FBI agents stormed into Gilbert's room with guns and stun batons.
>But when they tried to attack Gilbert's stand blocked all bullets with his strange new friend.
>Gilbert realized something important: he can control the being's actions.
>After hesistating, a bullet hit his right eye. Screaming with such might and anger, he made his stand obliterate the FBI agents in his room.
>Gilbert decided from this day his goal in life is to DESTROY THE GOVERNMENTS OF THE WORLD, FOR STEALING HIS RIGHT EYE.
>Gilbert thought the only way to escape any left law enforcement outside his house is to disguise himself using his old halloween pirate costume.
>He took a dead FBI agent's badge and hit it with his stand's disk and made the name of the badge: Gilbert Gomez; with his image.
>He walked outside and shown his badge to the idiot looking cops without question, they allowed him to leave the area.
>From that day on, he would no longer trust anyone, no longer allowed himself to be bossed around, he hated any and every type of government.
>He wants to bring ABSOLUTE CHAOS UPON THE WORLD'S GOVERNMENTS.
>His new name was..
>Captain Bit
>>
OP is a faggot.
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