RGRE: Reversed Gender Roles Equestria

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PET
THE
PONY

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>Anon gets invited to a sleepover.
>When he gets there he finds that he's the only guy and the girls are barely wearing anything.

"steady there old boy, mustn't let them know you're a total slut."

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>You will never have one of the mane 6 as a marefriend
>You will never be dragged into conflicts with the mane 6 simply by being associated with them
>Wrong place at the wrong time, that sort of thing
>Your marefriend will never feel horrible for being, in her mind, responsible for you getting hurt on these adventures
>You will never point out that she and her friends get more banged up than you do
>Your marefriend will never brush off her injuries and focus on your scrapes and bumps
>"It's a mare's job to look after her stallion, Anon. I don't know how I'd be able to stand it if you got seriously injured because of me."
>You will never cuddle and comfort her for the sake of her peace of mind

>>30580022
O god that's how she looks without her glasses put them back on Jesus, she looks like a grey alien.

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>Be Anon
>You were coming back from a very successful market trip
>Both arms were bogged down with bags filled with everything from meat to vegetables to sweets
>You had been lucky enough to get a pound of chocolate for cheap, and Carrot Top had been been nice enough to give you a few more carrots than usually
>But your best haul must have been from Applejack
>With some tactical flirting, and showing just a LITTLE bit of skin, you managed to get two dozen apples for four bits
>And that was a fucking steal
Now you'd have enough fruit to last you for about three weeks!
>Humming a little tune to yourself, you made your way down the street at a leisurely pace, not in any hurry at all
>Hmm...
>What should you make for dinner tonight?
>Did you want to fry something up, or maybe bake something?
>You had some flour that really--
>"Hey there big fella! Hey, over here!"
>You paused mid step
>And just who the heck was that?
>Looking around, your gaze eventually settled on a little pegasus waving at you
>It was that mare that always liked to bust Applejack's chops
>Strawberry something or other...
>"Yeah, I'm the one calling you," you said. "Now get your butt over here for a second!"
>Usually, you made it a point not to associate with ponies that used the word butt out in public
>You might have been many things, but you weren't no fucking savage
>Still though, from the way she was looking at you something seemed wrong
>So, despite yourself, you made your way over toward the little horse
>You stepped over her little white fence--silly tiny horses and their tiny fences--and made your way up onto her front porch
>She watched you anxiously, biting her lip the whole while
"Did you need something, ma'am?" you politely asked, staring down at her as you stopped just a foot away from her
>Without warning, the mare began walking around you, her wings ruffling and twitching
>"Something I need? Nonono, it's something you need, big guy," she said, shaking her head

>>30580194
kek
>You stand there, completely motionless.
>No sudden movements here; these thirsty students will pounce on you the moment they sense weakness.
>They're all giving you a look that promises a sore dick and a ruined reputation.
>....and then reality dawns on you.
>Horror spreads through your belly like an eldritch creature trying to escape as you remember one very important detail.
"Oh, no."
>Sweat drips down the back of your neck and something stirs in your pants.
"I'm a slut."
>The girls must have smelled your fear, because each of them adorns a toothy, victorious grin, and they all start to form a circle around you.
>As one of them starts to play with the hem of her panties, you realize that this house will be your tomb.
>....your reputation's tomb, anyway.

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>>30580054

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>>30580289
>She poked at your bags, mumbled to herself
>"I can't believe that they'd make a stallion carry THOSE! If that isn't abuse I don't know what is!"
>You frowned, looking around you to see if some little horse had stuck something on you when you weren't looking
>It was probably Rainbow again trying to be funny
>Fucking Rainbow...
"What? What are you talking about?" you asked. "What's the bad thing I'm holding?"
>"Those THINGS of course," the little mare said, poking at one of your bags
>Your frown deepened
>Gently placing all of your bags into the ground, you grabbed the bag and opened it up
>When you did so your two dozen apples stared back at you
>...
>Well not STARED
>You knew apples couldn't see
>You knew that obviously used some kind of echolocation system to get around
"What, these? They're just apples..."
>Strawberry looked up at you with sad green eyes
>"You poor, poor stallion," she murmured, shaking her head as she gave your leg a pat.
>Before you could ask what the hell was wrong with your apples she scooped up your bags and began carrying them inside her house
"Hey!" you barked, following the mare inside. "Those are mine, thank you very much."
>Strawberry looked back at you and smiled sadly, but said nothing as she led you into her kitchen
>It was a compact little space
>Not exactly modern, but a lot nicer than the one you had back home
>What was odd about it though were the strawberries
>They were everywhere
>Tiny strawberry plants were sitting on the windowsill
>There were jars of strawberry jams on the countertop
>A dozen baskets of strawberries were sitting on the kitchen table
>There were even strawberries etched on the oven mitts hanging on the oven
>As you stopped to take all of this in, Strawberry herself set all of your bags down onto the table
>Nose crinkling in disgust, she picked up your bag of apples, holding them at hooves' length

>>30580289
I'm interested

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>>30580398
>"I can't believe that Applejack keeps hawking her trash fruits to poor, single stallions like this," she said. "She may as well just dump week old trash into a bag and sell it ponies. It'd be just as good."
"Trash? They're just apples, you crazy horse," you said watching as she walked over and...
>...Bumped your apples into her garbage can
>...
>Alright then...
>Your eyebrows furrowed
>Adorable tiny horse or not, you'd kick this little horse's ass up and down this kitchen!
>You spent four bits on those fucking apples and just just pitched them!
>FOUR!
>You opened your mouth, ready to tear into the horse, but before you could she walked back over and gave your leg another pat
>"I know you didn't know any better, Anon," she said with a heartfelt smile. "Even though she looks like a no good hick, that Applejack is a sly dog. She talked you out of your heart-earned bits and gave you TRASH. But don't worry, I'm here now."
>Walking over to her kitchen table with your empty paper bag that had held your apples in tow, the little mare grabbed a basket of strawberries and upended them into the bag
>...
>The mild annoyance that had been building up in you dissipated
>You knew for a fact that strawberries were a heck of alot more expensive than apples
>Unlike their earth counterparts, the strawberries back here lasted a whole hell of a lot longer and could take more of a beating
>The problem was that they were a lot harder to grow, for reasons that you couldn't discern because you weren't a farmer
>And the crazy horse in front of you just bumped what must have been fifty bits worth of strawberries into your bag
"...Are those for me?" you asked
>"Of course," Strawberry replied, neatly rolling the top of the bag before walking over and setting it down with all of your other food. "It's the least I could do after all the trauma you've suffered from having to eat those apples."
>Walking up to you, the little horse gave you a smile

>>30580513
yandere strawberry farmer

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>>30580513
>"Now come on, let's sit you down so you can rest after your ordeal. You poor thing..."
>Unfurling a wing, the mare wrapped it around your hand and all but dragged you out of the kitchen and into what looked like a living room
>You, confused as to what the hell was happening, barely offered any resistance as the pegasus sat you down
>"Don't worry about Applejack the next time you go into the market," she said, hopping into your lap. "I'll make sure to go with you so she doesn't try to make your taste in fruits as horrible as yours."
>Leaning toward you, the little horse gave your cheek a nuzzle
>She unfurled her wings, wrapping them around your shoulders
>"I'll have to keep an eye out the whole time, but I'm sure I'll be able to beat her away, big guy," she said, wrapping her hooves around your neck and slowly pushing you down onto the couch. "The problem is that Applejack is the kind of mare that would stalk a poor stallion at all hours of the day to force feed you trash, so I'll have to keep a REALLY good eye on you."
>The moment your back touched the touch and your head was resting on a surprisingly soft pillow, the pegasus laid herself on top of you, resting her chin on your chest as she looked up at you with her bright green eyes
>"It'll probably be best if you move in with me. Or maybe I should move in with you, because you're a big ol' colt and you're house is already sized up."
>She wiggled up a bit so that she could nuzzle your chin
>"It might be a little hard getting used to sleeping together, and bathing together, and you making me breakfast every morning, but I'm sure the two of us will adjust. It's a better alternative than eating APPLES forever, right?"
>You blinked owlishly as the little mare let out a sigh of contentment, wiggling on top of you to make herself more comfortable
"I... um... what?"
>Strawberry chuckled, reaching up and giving your head a pat

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>>30580609
>"Don't worry, Anon. You've seen the light. Apples have no more power over you anymore," she murmured. "Just like me."

~_~_~_~_~
>Be Applejack
>Something was... wrong
>Your snottle was scrunching and you had no idea why
>It felt as if somepony had just thrown away two dozen perfectly good apples for no good reason
>...
>Sweet Celestia...

>>30580637
Alright, I'm done. Some mind fuckery snuggles for everyone. Embrace the Strawberry side.

>>30580647
strawberry cuuuuuuunt

>>30580637
Is this what NTR is?

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>>30580647
For some reason, I feel like a typical AiE Anon (RGR or not) would end up with a pony like Strawberry Sunrise rather than a Mane 6.

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>>30580647
>Her house is probably infused with the scent of strawberry.
>Her mane probably smells the same.
>She probably tastes like it too.
>Pegasus.
>Dominant bordering on rape.
You're goddamn right i'm embracing that.

>>30580286
AYY LMAO

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>>30580286
>>30580845
She looks okay.

Guy, i remember a story, but i don't know who made it.

It's from the point of view of Fleur De Liz, narrating her life with her new camera-man Anon.

Who wrote it and if you can tell me where can i read it again.

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>>30581301
Pretty sure it was a green originally, but here's the fimfic version.
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/373937/1/cest-la-vie/un
Bon Appétit.

>>30581337
Fuck fimfiction.
I'm going to desuachive.

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>>30581301
You know damn well who wrote it.

And the other one with Shimmer and Princess Twilight getting Anon into Equestria?

>>30581387
Ir's LaP dude. It's always been LaP. LaP is basically the sole pillar holding this thread up.

>>30581417
I think he did something featuring Eris too. Different Anon, but I could have sworn a story featuring her existed. I need it. If someone knows it please give the bin or the archived thread.

>>30581454
They're all on page 2 of his bin.
https://pastebin.com/pMFccPjH

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>>30580305

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How to ride little horse?

>>>/trash/10593996

>>30581785
"But you're way too big Anon. I'm not sure if I can handle it"

>>30582159
It's ok. She's a big,, little pony. She can take it.

>>30581417
I'm not even joking either. Other writefags come and go but LaP is pretty much the only one who still writes regularly. If we managed to drive away even Love and Powerlifting then RGRE would well and truly be dead.

>>30582207
t.LaP

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>"I be afeared ye can nah come wit' us, Anon. Th' sea be no ship fer a stallion, 'n 'twould brin' us bad luck, a'right?"

Wha' say ye, landlubber?

>>30582250
Get the hell off my ship before I plunder your booty

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>>30582259
Yarr, the only treasure to be 'avin 'ere be the white gold betwixt yer thighs! Scamper off to me quarters and throw those clothes overboard, I be fixin' to enjoy meself a little bit'o me "captain's mast"

>>30582352
That "white gold" will put a foal in your belly.

>>30582207
>TFW some thread writers would rather write for furry threads on /trash/ than for us
LaP, please never leave us.

>>30578172
Actually, LaP's namesake fic is a comfy version of this without Shining getting worried or jealous. I recommend it.

>>30582400
I remember that one. It's one of my favourite things LaP's done.

>>30582375
probably because they're so desperate for writefags over there they'd jump at the chance to suck dick for content.

>>30582352
>Anon wants to experience life on the high seas.
>Ships are usually crewed by exclusively mares and are thus superstitious about having stallions on board.
>At the same time being out at sea for months at a time can be lonely, causing some mares crave to the company of the fairer sex.
>Anon is forced to lie about his gender in order to join the crew of a merchant ship

>>30582459
>Anon gets found out trading bits for givin a dickin
>He's not allowed to use swords anymore
>Captain "takes her share" of Anon, but vows to drop him off at next port
>They get raided by another ship
>Boarding party fails to fight off the other crew
>Anon is now part of the other ship's haul of loot
>This keeps happening before they can get to port to drop him off
>Captain Blackbeard is actually the eighth captain he's "served under"

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>>30582375
probably cause any writefag that doesn't write approved by RGRE autists (trademark pending) stories gets REEEEEED out
like that johnnybgoode guy, or ephemeral or any other countless other writefags

this general is 80% shitposting, 10% memes, 9% prompts and 1% green
all we've got left who's still around from the old days is LaP who's been posting short silly things, since BNW seems to be claimed by the propellers
We will never get part 2 of that daring doo story
It's dead forever so might as well accept it, fucker is never going back to it ever

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>>30582563
I remember when Ephemeral first posted. The shitstorm that came from it hit the bump limit of the first thread and then nearly hit the half way mark of the next thread.

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>>30582563
>There was a time when the thread was 47% shitposting, 10% memes, 40% prompts (that were shitty self-inserts) and 3% green.
I don't know if I should be glad or mad.

>>30582603
>>30582563

can we make a fucking thread rule that if its RGRE it STAYS

it doesnt fucking matter if its mixes something with other threads as long as RGRE remains as the overarching background and whatever else they put in is the plot

for christsake we had 3 threads of shitposts and pornposting

>>30582616
It could go either way. The first prompt pastebin has nearly 15,000 lines of unused prompts, and that's kind of impressive in a way.

>>30582625
I wish. The thread has 1 regular writer (luv u 5eva LaP) and 2 semi regular writers, we can't afford people telling potential writers to fuck off because Nightmare Moon's a main character or whatever.

>>30582517
>>Captain "takes her share" of Anon, but vows to drop him off at next port
>"Mmmm... that's right, you dirty slut..."
>Captain Peg-Beard wriggles around in your lap as you rub firm circles on her soft belly.
>"Rub my tummy harder."

>>30582644
thats what i mean, as long as the story is RGRE it stays, why would a writer suddenly just post a story without knowing the thread theme first? it's like the oldest newfag mistake

the moon greens' RGRE(Original Gender Roles Moon?) was more subtle but was there, i personally had no complaint about it since it was good.

whats worse people bitching about the Bat ponies, its like they think the are no bat ponies existing in the show canon.

>>30581145
She's looks ugly as fuck man.

>>30582700
She*

>>30582207
t. LaP
>>30582625
>If it's RGRE it STAYS.
There will always be a guy or a bunch of Anons that will reeeeee.
I have forgotten about the batponies and RGMAnon kek.

>>30582716
>>There will always be a guy or a bunch of Anons that will reeeeee.

standard operating procedure then:

tell writefags to ignore autists and encourage them to just keep to writing

>>30582687
It's like, wait until we've reached a minimum threshold of content providers before we start doing quality control and cull the weak. It won't matter if there's bats or no bats if the person writing about'em is the only person in the entire thread who's writing at all.

>>30582700
I think the color of her fur is nice.

>>30582563
the only reason LaP has so much visibility is because he's something other than human. other writefags write, but not at the pace that LaP somehow sets for himself. other writefags have jobs, responsibilities, perhaps even lives outside of /mlp/ just kidding they wouldn't be here otherwise and other things that keep them away from good writing time.
i think the reason there's so much shitposting and REEEing in this thread is because our autists have such high power levels they can't stand to browse other threads, so they bicker here until more green is posted.

>>30582625
No, because that opens the floodgates for all kinds of shitposting so long as it pretends to be RGRE, while shoehorning X into the thread. We lasted this long without letting that happen, we should stay like that to make sure we don't turn into something worse.

>>30582757
>It's like, wait until we've reached a minimum threshold of content providers before we start doing quality control and cull the weak
not the i'd put it but something like that

more on the lines where the green IS RGRE but the grammar, story flow, etc is nonsensical or the writer is just some shitposter THEN we cull em

Like Durnk but he was on the line if anybody crosses him its free game

btw is he dead?

>>30582687
It is just one autistic dude trying to make telling fetish writers to leave a bad thing. Yelling at batponies is stupid, but anything else is fair game.

>>30582785
I think Durnk just Anon posts now....or he is with his Purple Drinking waifu in the sky.

>>30582778
yeah but we're turning to a autisting reeeeeing shhitposting thread with only LaP as a regular poster these days

im not saying we allow the wierdo fetishist from /b/ or /trash/ to come in here lets be reasonable

we either ease off or die off

>>30582778
>opens the floodgates for all kinds of shitposting
>wheredoyouthinkweare.png

>>30580289
>Now you'd have enough fruit to last you for about three weeks!
missed a greenline

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>>30582812
>>wheredoyouthinkweare.png
Use a reaction pic son

>All this debate about to reee or not to reeee
The thread's dead, famalamadingdongs. We got 1 dude writing for us and 2 dudes sorta writing for us and when we aren't posting prompts, we're reeeing about things we don't like. RGRiE will die pure and bat-free before it sees xmas.

>>30582778
we don't need that level of purity, anon, just some reasonable standards. for example, here are some unreasonable ones:
>RGRE setting, but the story is about a homohoers struggling for acceptance
>RGRE setting, but the story is about Anon having learning to love shitting in diapers
>RGRE setting, but the story is about Anon catching flak for liking futa ponies more than mares
>RGRE setting, but the story is about Anon being over the top edgy, or overpowered with bullshit magic
>RGRE setting, but the story is about Anon assembling a herd so he can enjoy hoersfarts anytime, anywhere

not that these topics would be verboten in themselves, but the story being nothing more than fetish fuel for the author makes them shit. here's how they could be made reasonable:
>RGRE setting, but the story is about a Anon trying to convince everypony he isn't gay, but also not attracted to hoersvagoo
>RGRE setting, but the story is about Anon having trouble distinguishing between mares and stallions, and futas exist for some reason, making him all the more confused
>RGRE setting, but the story is about Anon dealing with the moral issues of being OP compared to ponies, think one punch man or his mindset/predilections being too edgy for the saccharine world of equestria
>RGRE setting, but the story is about Anon assembling a herd but, to his eternal frustration, all his waifus have a disgusting fart fetish he never knew about and now he must learn to deal with it in a world where mares rule the day

most writers, if they're not experienced, can't pull off having the above content worked in to a good story like the ones below. if anything, we should let people write RGRE stories with whatever content they want, until we can tell if we're being bamboozled into fetish fuel territory or comedy/drama/worldbuilding exploration

>>30582778
I still say that if it's sufficiently RGR, we let it stay. The unfortunate thing is that we have autists who REEEEEE at everything. Hell, you guys remember that discord autist who truly believed he was doing a service to everyone in this thread by screeching about how discord is killing everything. I believe his reasoning also included saying that scaring away any writefag because they didn't want to be yelled at kept those who continued to write around. Shit like that isn't going to help in the long run.

>>30582352
>>30582459
>>30582517
>>30582666

Anon becomes pirate captain the like of Madame Ching

>>30582778
No progress was ever made without taking any risks.

>>30582838
I suppose that unacceptable list would work.
>>30582844
Except the Discord has everyone that doesn't write, but I suppose we can ignore that for the few that came out and said they were quitting

>thread turning meta again
See you fags later.

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>>30582844
>The discord autist
Oh christ, I remember him. He's got notches on his belt for writefags that got fed up with the thread because of him.

>>30582563
RGRE is Dead.

>>30582852
And obviously dumb risks kill everyone.
>>30582860
Except he never yelled at writefags, just the discord.

>>30582858
>the DIscord
shit I haven't heard about that place in a while!

>>30582844
He didn't say the Discord was scaring away writefags, he said, the Discord was being used as a replacement for the thread.

>>30582838
this makes a lot more sense

>>30582860
>>30582844
>everyone who shares a certain opinion that isn't mine is all the same person
>i can tell, even on an anonymous imageboard that doesn't have ids
this reminds me a lot of the meme from back in 2007-ish or so:
>everyone on 4chins is the same person responding to himself

either way, people like you are cancer.

>>30582844
>I believe his reasoning also included saying that scaring away any writefag because they didn't want to be yelled at kept those who continued to write around.
Yeah, something to the effect of "if they can't stand shitposting then they were never going to stick around long to begin with". Fucking thanks, I guess.

>>30582884
It was, "if they cant stand shitposting that didn't involve them, they wouldn't stay long". Keep implying.

>>30582844
>Discordfag(s)
I have forgotten about him/them, desu I agreed with him/them in some way, they were right in some points like this >>30582878

>>30582889
>If they can't stand endless shitposting from autists with a hair trigger
Well we've got 1 regular writer, so I guess most people couldn't.

Hey, I'm working on something that's not RGRE, but it is herd based, do I post it here? I'm asking because I remember that herds used to be a thing here.

>>30582892
His sentiment was correct (in that the discord had the potential to replace the thread), but the way he went about spreading it was his undoing. People didn't see someone trying to warn them that the thread was in danger of a mass writefag exodus, they saw a screeching retard who would never shut up.

>>30582898
Except the ones that came in and said they had IRL shit and didn't even notice the thread having a shitshow unless they dropped by too post. Blaming one group of people for writefags having lives...which is odd considering where we are, makes no sense.

>>30582903
I thought herding was inherently RGRE? Unless I was mistaken

>>30582903
How is it not RGRE and you have herds? Herding is a big thing here, so you are right on that. Just make it RGRE then post to your hearts content.
>>30582904
Especially when people kept baiting him to go on tangents, then blowing those out of proportion to the point he was making. Then the thread kept ignoring him out of spite.
>>30582915
It is our thing, but I guess some threads got in on it too.

>>30582915
I think it is for the most part. Generally the reversed gender roles are attributed to a low male-to-female birth ratio, so herding was necessary to ensure that most of the female population didn't end up never getting laid.

>>30582915
My story features herds but it doesn't really delve into rgre. Like there's no "Oh, anon, you weak colt, let me get that for you" stuff.

>>30582929
I'm certain a few weeks back there was some faggot who was around screaming about how herding was a shit fetish and that it should be kept out of RGRE. I'm hoping everyone else saw how retarded that guy was.

>>30582935
green is green, it's been several threads of vomit.

just post it please anon. please

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hey, I have more moonpone. here we're going to get into the area of writing with which I struggle the most: believable dialogue.

===

>You struggle to parse the words the captain spoke
>Each one makes sense individually, and as a statement as well
>But it doesn't make sense in context
"W-what?"
>The captian looks back at you as you stumble behind her back the route you both came not moments ago
>"The King and Queen have arrived. They're waiting for you in the meeting room."
"B-b-but, they...I would have known if they had--how?"
>"Simple. They, how do you describe it down here...teleported."
>You can feel yourself starting to hyperventilate.
>She has to be lying.
"Ok, ok, teleportation I understand. Teleportation I'm very familiar with. But where did they start from? Did they stop at the edge of town? How'd they get through the Castle's wards?"
>"I wasn't aware you castle had wards, Princess."
"Well I'm starting to seriously doubt that now!"
>"I would have appreciated that information when we first arrived, Princess Twilight. No matter, they are here. As for your first question, they started inside the Gray Spire."
>The Gray Spire.
"The Gray Spire."
>"Yes."
"On the moon."
>"Yes."
"That doesn't make sense."
>"I thought you were familiar with teleportation."
"I am! And that's why it doesn't make sense. That's impossible!"
>"Why?"
" Celestia herself doesn't have the power to teleport that far! I'm the Element of Magic ponified and even I couldn't teleport that distance if I knocked myself out!"
>"Well then it certainly sounds improbable, but not impossible."

>>30582935
That's just one style of writing. There doesn't have to be overt sexism, you just need to >imply it

>>30582903
Herds are a sub-category of RGRE, a by product of the RGRE culture if your story is herding alone it may or may not have RGRE, if your story IS RGRE it WILL have herding one point or anothing if it has sex or romance

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>>30582954
>She's messing with you.
>This has to be some sort of pre-negotiation intimidation tactic.
>You squint your eyes and stop in the hall, trying to give her your best Princess Glare while you call her out on her horseapples.
"The thaumic potential of all of Equis and its inhabitants does not equate to enough power to teleport one being that far, let alone two. It would only be possible if we factored in the Magic of Friendship variable or the Power of Love coefficient, and there haven't been any situations where that would give rise, because I am the Princess of Friendship and my Sister-in-Law is the Princess of Love!"
>She just gives you a stone-faced stare.
>Doesn't help that they're all still taller than you.
>"And yet they are here."
>This isn't possible!
>Especially since...
"Aha! What about King Anonymous? He is immune to magic! How did he get here with teleportation?"
>"When you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth."
>Did...did she just quote Captain Speck?
>How could she know about that, she's lived on the moon her whole life!
>"Princess," she says, before turning and continuing down the hall, "I think you'll find we may surprise you with what we can do."
>You rush to catch up and match her stride, finally reaching the point in the hallway where the lamps are unlit.
"How did you manage something like that? The Power of Love isn't called upon so easily."
>"I'm afraid there isn't much more I can tell you on the matter."
"Don't try and tell me it's because you're not an expert. My brother Shining Armor knew how everything worked in his armory when he was captain of the guard."
>"No, I'm quite familiar with the techniques involved, but I've been ordered to withhold certain information until clearance has been given."
"So you're saying..."
>"Yes, Princess. That information is classified."

>>30582941
I am 80% sure that guy was just some kid having summer fun. And
>I'm certain a few weeks back there was some faggot who was around screaming about how herding was a shit fetish and that it should be kept out of RGRE. I'm hoping everyone else saw how retarded that guy was.
Herding is one of the damn standards in the thread. Nobody that actually goes here would take him seriously.
>>30582954
And on that note. MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNN

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>>30582954
>GREENTEXT
It's like an oasis in the desert.

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>>30582969
>Oh you know this game.
>You ran into it all the time back at Canterlot.
>You knew how to get around it, too.
>You light another pair of lamps.
"Well, considering the fact that it's a major threat to national security, I believe I have a need to know. Please, explain how you were able to breach the castle's wards."
>"That information, or its relevance, is classified."
>You let out a growling sigh and lit another pair of lamps.
>This mare had made you so frustrated.
>You hadn't given much thought to castle security after the first time you teleported face-first against the wall when you were in a hurry.
>Sure, it had given you some comfort that ponies couldn't just up and teleport inside your crystal castle, but it also didn't prevent you from teleporting around once inside it.
>You knew how it worked, and yet she just told you it didn't work.
>You were frustrated she hadn't told you they were teleporting
>That they somehow figured out a way around your magical walls
>That you didn't get to witness it
>And the fact that the dear captain next to you has gone into "Customer Service Mode" that you became quite acquainted with during your time in Canterlot.
>You weren't going to get much more information out of her.
>Although she did mention an incident at Canterlot...
>You light the last lamp, wondering how their spell could have caused trouble with something like that.
>Definitely worth looking into later.
>You stop before the closed doors to the meeting room and take a deep breath, trying to relax.
>Ok, Twilight, you can do this.
>Princess Celestia trusts you.
>You open the doors and step in, surveying the room.

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>>30582978
>The ponies have rearranged all the furniture like you had it before, and are standing around the room against the walls.
>Two new moonponies have arrived and are seated on either side of the Royal Couple.
>Both of them wear strange helmets and sit absolutely still.
>The entire face of the helm is a dome of polished metal with a cyan-glowing crecent moon between where their eyes should be, leaving only their horns, ears, and the lower half of their muzzles exposed.
>How are they even supposed to see?
>Between them sit Queen Selena and King Anonymous.
>Despite what happened in the Castle of the Two Sisters, you can see she still retains the form of Nightmare Moon.
>While the sight of her doesn't make you shiver (anymore), it's still unsettling to see her so calmly sitting at a table inside your castle
>Next to her alien king
>Surrounded by strange guards with, perhaps, powers you can't imagine
>Who teleported straight into your castle from the bucking MOON
>And she acts like this is all normal!
>You had wondered at first, when you first met her at Canterlot not too long ago during her reunion with her sister, if it was something that would fade over time, or perhaps just a glamour, but she keeps it still.
>Her regalia remains the same as it was when she was banished, but shining silver now and somehow...slightly less evil-looking.
>King Anonymous sits next to her in his chair, matching his wife in height, even folded-up like that.
>Around his neck is one of those pendants everypony from the moon seems to wear, and a silver crown sits around his head.
>You can see his cloak hung up on the wall behind him. Long white fur, speckled with dots of black, poke out of the top, and several pieces of strange-looking armor are attached to different points.
>He's still covered in clothes and seated quite close to his wife, like something out of that cover of Cona The Barbarian somehow got his claws on.

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>>30582985
>On his face is a hint of a smile, but it's hard to tell when it's so much smaller compared to that of a pony.
>On one side of the blind guards sits a third new pony wearing a hooded robe.
>Another pair of glowing slitted eyes stares out at you from the darkness of the robe, which has a solid siver lining at the edges, backed with more opulent swirls and points of silver against a very dark-blue cloth. It almost drapes around her head and from her hooves, more akin to a blanket than a robe.
>You give a quick and courteous bow.
"Welcome, Queen Selena and King Anonymous, to Castle Friendship. I'm sorry I couldn't greet you when you arrived."
>"Greetings, Princess Sparkle. It is good to see you again," Queen Selena begins, "Thank you for agreeing to meet with us for negotiations."
>Her voice has a much more pronounced effect to it than the rest of the moonponies.
>"Yes," the deep voice of King Anonymous adds, "Hopefully we can work something out to serve the both of us."
>He looks over to the robed pony with a slight frown and raises his arm to point at her.
>"Allow me to introduce my youngest son, Colonus."
>Wait, son?
>King Anonymous sighs.
>"Well, go ahead and introduce yourself, son."
>The pony stands up and puts both hooves on the table, slowly looming upward.
>With a whip of his head his hood flows onto the back of his neck,
>Oh Celestia, Faust, have mercy on this poor virgin
>Why must you be forced to endure such trials?
>His flowing and sparkling mane, swirling with hints of light green and purple at the edges, covers his face for a moment before arcing through the air to rest behind it.
>The shape of his face much more closely resembles his mother
>A long but sleek, chisled jaw with two fangs poking out of his smirk.
>His eyes glow much more brightly than his peers, and they seem to lock you in place with their slitted gaze

>>30582929
>>30582935

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>>30582994
>A hoof you hadn't noticed twirls up to land on his chest and he faces up and to the left
>Both his eyes are locked on you, though
>As if nothing else in the room mattered more
>"Greetings, Princess Twilight Sparkle," he begins, "allow me to introduce myself."
>The other moonponies' voices might as well have been chalk squeaking on a board.
>This one is smooth as silk, deep as an earthquake, and echoes just as much as his mother.
>Gotta admit, that earthquake simile was terrible, Twilight.
>But it definitely describes how your hindquarters are feeling right about now.
>You love the way your name sounds coming out of his mouth.
>How you'd love to make him scream it.
>"I am Prince Colonus, youngest son born to Queen Selena and King Anonymous, Soveriegn Rulers of the Moon."
>He backs away from the table and slowly strides toward you, never breaking eye contact.
>You can't seem to move.
>You don't want to.
>"I can't tell you how pleased I am to finally meet you face-to-face, Princess Twilight."
>He's close enough you can smell him now.
>What a nice cologne he's chosen.
>It goes so well with his musk.
>"Mother and Father were so gracious as to allow me to attend. After all, this was my idea."
>He closes in and reaches out to you
>One of his long, slender legs pokes out from beneath his flowing robes and takes your hoof in his.
>His height forces him to bow, and his eyes only break their spell on you to kiss your hoof.
>Oh you could get used to this.
>Now you know why Rarity swoons talking about something like this.
>Hmm, a Royal Decree just came to mind...

>>30582985
Start taking bets, folks! Is Anon going to be cool and distant like his wife, or is he going to be the foil to his wife's straight man trope? Will he stare down Celestia, or will he pick up the nearest Equestrian pony and start to casually hand out belly rubs?

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>>30583000
>But first, stop sperging out at the first stallion to approach you!
>You try to say something in response, but he looks back up at you
>You can't possibly interrupt him.
>"I do so enjoy the hunt, so I hope our talks go well. Perhaps we could even-"
>"Colonus, knock it off," King Anonymous interrupts anyway, "Give the poor girl a break."
>"Yes," Queen Selena joins in, "We are here to discuss the hunting and slaying of beasts, not hunting the sort of game that requires your 'spear.'"
>His eyes suddenly widen and he quickly but gently drops your hoof.
>"O-of course, Mother," he responds, then turns back to you, "Forgive me for being so forward, Princess, I thought it only proper."
>King Anonymous grunts. "Proper tactics maybe. Get back to your seat before you live up to your name."
>No.
>Please don't go sit so far from me.
>Come back and give my hoof more kisses.
>Queen Selena chuckles, but it sounds to you more like she's just successfully enacted some evil plot. "Every generation you doubt the Mother's Intuition, and every generation I am vindicated."
>"Oh hush. We still have to talk about 'that,' you know."
>"We will discuss it at home, dear, nowhere else."
>"Then you'll need a short leash for Colonus here, before he finds himself inside a diplomat...-ic incident."
>"Father, please!" Colonus begs as his father chuckles.
>If you didn't know better, it sounded as if he was a dragon.
>...
>You might be out of your depth here.
>"Suffer your embarassment with some dignity, Colonus," Queen Selena scolds, "You brought this upon yourself, and your father is well within his rights."
>"Especially," the king continues, "since I saw you practicing your introduction at home, son. Try to behave, at least?"
>"Do not fail me, Colonus," the queen warns in a cold voice out of your nightmares, "Or you shall never see the inside of another negotiation room again."

>>30583002
Anon would put on a straight face to appear regal but would crack if he saw any foals running around

>>30582250
>>30582352

Be Anon
>and god dammit Applejack has dipped into the family whisky a bit too heavily again
>this time she thinks she is a pirate, and her barn is a pirate ship
>"I afeared ye canne come wit us Anon, Th' sea be no ship for a stallion. 'n 'twould brin' us bad luck a'right"
>she yells from the attic door of the barn
>Though her pirate talk is impressive you need to get your backpack back from where it hanged up in the barn
>And every time you tried to enter she either threw an apple or a hay bale at you
>fucking crazy horse
"fucks sake apples, I just want my back pack"
>"Yarr, ye bee tryin' tah plunder me booty thar ye male, off with ye"
>she swayed so much you were actually a bit concerned she might fall off the loft
>get an idea
"I'll plunder your booty so hard you won't be able to walk straight out of davy jone's locker"
>Her face lights up red like a Christmas tree she staggers back a bit
>You take this opportunity to rush in and grab your bag without risk of thrown objects
>As you walk away you hear her shout something about burying treasure
>fucking drunk ponies

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>>30583009
>You really hope their banter is distracting enough to keep them from noticing how you're walking right about now.
>You're pretty sure Colonus knows, though.
>You make it to your seat and a thought strikes you.
>The girls will never believe this.
>A stallion prince.
>From the bucking Moon.
>Aggressively and openly approached YOU.
>You find your seat and light your horn to summon your paperwork.
>Both of the silent ponies immediately turn to face you, almost like birds, and your horn extinguishes in surprise.
>"Oh, don't mind them," the king waves his hand, "They're just sensitive. What are you casting?"
>"Ju-ust," your voice cracks and you cough to try and sound normal, "Just bringing in the paperwork."
>The queen nods and you bring it from your study with a small flash.
>"Excellent," Queen Selena smiles, "Let us begin."

===

and that's it for this update. sorry it took so long, but i got a little caught up in worldbuilding. hopefully the details i worked out will make themselves apparent in the story, but if something seems OP or strange, just know that i've got however convoluted a reason for it.
don't know how long it will be until the next update, but i'll keep writing.
https://pastebin.com/N6W5REma

>>30583019
Is that a promise?

>There is a new gang rising in notoriety
>They have agents in every country, city, and town
>They have gained wealth and respect in a staggeringly short amount to time
>But there's a catch
>Every single time somepony comes out as the "boss," they they always kidnap a local prince named Anonymous Text
>Causing all manners of hero types to descend upon them in righteous fury
>It's obvious this gang has some sort of secret leader
>Now it's my job to reveal this sheathsniveller to the world
>And it all starts with a visit to Mr. Text
>I just hope I can put the poor gentleman's fears to rest

>>30583024
Put out the next part faster. I want to know what happens and what shenanigans the young prince will get into.

>>30583014
>Anon is a merciless negotiator
>Face is intentionally blank with a hint of disapproval
>Shoulders squared and back straight, his posture screams "I'm about to fuck these negotiation deals right in the asshole"
>Right before the deals come to a close, a tiny foal wanders into the room
>Immediately after, a mare runs in and snatches the foal up in her magic and backs away, apologizing for letting her kid run wild
>Meanwhile, Anon gets the biggest dumbest open mouthed smile on his face

>>30582375
S-shut up, the monster girl threads arn't furry

>>30583024
MUH DIK

>>30583042
They write monster girl now? I thought they stuck to the pets of furry threads... not that I go there.

>>30583042
why are you writing for /trash/? double4chins has a whole board dedicated to that topic.

>>30583057
>board
site.

>>30583057
I thought monster girl was a /d/ thing.

>>30583019
>Fixed his writing.
I look forward to your update...and maybe some more pirate applebotttom.

>>30583072
>>30583069
>>30583057
>>30583054
Technically monstergirls fall under /tg/ territory, with the more...tentacle orientated monsters going to /d/.

>>30582915
>>30582929
>>30582941
>>30582934
>>30582953
>>30582959
>>30582960
>"M-mom!? What the hay are you doing in bed with Anon? What about dad?”
>”Hi Dashie! How’s my number one Wonderbolt doing? Your father is fine, he’s in the corner, see?” Windy replies, her breathing labored due to the exercise you’d just given her.
>Rainbow looks in the corner of the room you’re in, her room to be precise, and sees her father sucking off Night Light, Twilight’s father, naturally, taken aback by this, she cannot even recoil in horror, rather, she freezes, unable to comprehend what she is seeing, her mother, with the most satisfied look on her face imaginable underneath the alien primate that moved to ponyville a few months ago, and her father in the corner of her room blowing off her best friend’s dad.
>”What the hay is going on in here?!” She explodes, no longer capable of containing her confusion
”We’re having an orgy, Rainbow.” You deadpan, your tone indicating that what you’d said was clearly obvious.
>If you came off as curt, it was just because you could slowly feel yourself growing softer with every passing second. You may have been balls deep in Rainbow Dash’s mother, you may have came inside her multiple times, but the fact of the matter was that the willingness of the spirit can only compensate for so much weakness of the flesh.
>Rainbow, naturally, seems to get angrier by the second, “I can see that, numbnuts! I’m asking why the hay you’re doing it in my room?” The world being the way it is, both stallions orally pleasuring one another in the room’s corner gasped in shock at loyalty’s outburst.
>At that moment, WIndy Whistle may have been mentally recovering from the post orgasmic bliss of her nth orgasm, and physically recovering from the physical exertion required to attain her nth orgasm, but a lifetime of societal upbringing compelled her to speak.

>>30583120
>”Look, champ, you know that I’m always proud of you, and you know that you’re the best, but you really can’t be using that kind of language around stallions,”
>You’re at about half chub at this point. You’ve been fucking Rainbow’s mom for awhile today, and you’ve come a bunch of times, but truth be told, you wanted to get one more shot off.
>”I don’t care mom! Why is it, that my friend, my mom, my dad and best friend’s dad are all bucking in my room? How the buck did this even happen?!” She snorts and stomps her little hoovsies while doing this.
>Rainbow’s father takes this moment to free his mouth from Night Light’s cock. “Rainbow, honey, remember how-” normally, at this point, Rainbow would drone her father out, but a strange mixture of despair, arousal, and morbid curiosity made her continue paying attention, >“me and all your friend’s fathers would meet up in Canterlot for our monthly get togethers? Well, we met your friend here while shopping for”
>Truth be told, a strange mixture of despair, arousal, and morbid curiosity could only go so far, Rainbow knew how colts loved to talk, and as much as she would have loved to pay attention, her father had a habit of talking her ear off.
>Of course, by the time Bow finished talking, your half chub was no more, it had been replaced by a pair of blue balls, cyan ones to be specific. The mood, ruined, you huffed.
“Look, RD, if you don’t mind, we’re kind of in the middle of something here, now I’m going to go back fucking your mom as soon as I get hard again, with, or without you in the room, so, unless you want to see something you’re probably going to regret, I’d suggest closing that door.”
>Rainbow stared blankly at you before exiting her room, and closing the door. You could hear the sound of flapping wings slowly growing fainter by the second.

>>30583125
>>30583120
christ almighty...

we were just discussing about when and where to reeeee at low quality green

and speak of the devil....

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>>30583152
bad is better than nothing, and bad eventually leads to mediocre, then to okay, and finally to good. Just give him time and maybe, just maybe, a new writefag will be born.

>>30583125
keep writing faggot

captcha made me laugh

>>30580609
>"I'll make sure to go with you so she doesn't try to make your taste in fruits as horrible as yours."
YOU DID IT AGAIN.

>>30582838
By these rules can I write an anthro green as long as is RGRE?
>>30581785
/Trash/ actually isn't all that bad

>>30583267
you can write anything anon... its just a matter of how quickly you're reeeeeee'd out of the thread

>>30583152
>>30583207
Would you guys mind telling me what I did wrong? I'm writing the next part now, and want to avoid the same mistakes.

>>30583207
fuck it ill just lurk again

posting is exhausting

>>30583279
lurkmoar

go to the pastebin, read the old stuff, especially Lap's and BrandNewWritefag's

i really feel like you are far too new to be writing

but screw it there are far too few writefags for me to complain

>>30583152
This is why you don't make the argument to accept trash
>>30583207
Fucking leave with him.>>30583279
You are posting bait with faggot trash, go somewhere else.

>>30583279
personally i don't see nothing very wrong, in fact i thought it was pretty decent. just keep writing and you'll get better. Eventually pretty decent will be nothing too you, you will be above mere decency.

>>30583279
it's a matter of topic.

>>30583279
1) Don't repeat the same description in narration and dialogue
2) Break up paragraphs of dialogue with little descriptive sentences
3) RD is not, in fact, cyan.
4) Start from the point of view of the main character. Have the narration follow what they can sense. Describe more of his emotional and physical reactions.
5) When posting green, try to post at least 6000 characters (3 posts). Stoping and starting with smaller chunks just makes it harder to follow and enjoy the story.
6) Have fun, and keep practicing writing.

>>30583279
Anon I thought it was fine and honestly you got a little bit of a laugh out of me. It came off a little rushed, but you had a decent feeling in it. And nice subtle rgre with the cussing bit and stallions.

>>30583207
>bad is better than nothing
Wrong, especially when the content in question shouldn't be here to begin with.
>and bad eventually leads to mediocre, then to okay, and finally to good.
Almost never happens, so I would like to know what your smoking.
>Just give him time and maybe, just maybe, a new writefag will be born.
That is for people that aren't posting obvious bait prompts. Again.
>>30583279
The content was not RGRE, it involved gay, as well as cucking. Lurkmoar and kill yourself. In either order so long as its done.

>>30583380
You're looking a bit to hard into the false positives of a bait story.

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>>30583125
I chuckled so you're good to me.

>>30583125
Trips >>30583444 says you're good then.

>>30582994
>>Oh Celestia, Faust, have mercy on this poor virgin
kek
this story is great

>>30583469
A good joke certainly, but not as a story.

>>30583504
Your opinion is not a fact senpai

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>>30583009
>>King Anonymous grunts. "Proper tactics maybe. Get back to your seat before you live up to your name."
>Colonus

>>30583515
Neither are tips posts by that logic.

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>>30583532
trips never lie faggot

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>>30583542
And no one said that, now did they?

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>>30583125
>>It had been replaced by a pair of blue balls, cyan ones to be specific.

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>>30583552
Yes someone did. You had implied that trips were in fact not facts. A roundabout way of saying they were not the objective truths we know them to be. We call ideas of qualitive based off ones perspective that are not completely factual to be opinions, and opinions are by there very nature not an objective truth, therefor a sort of lie. To imply that trips are not a fact is to equate them with a lie. And they are not. Because trips never lie

>>30583024
the term "stallion prince" seems rather redundant

>>30583532
Gets are always truth tho

>>30583024
I'm liking the 'silent ponies.' They're perfectly intimidating and foreboding. Definitely honor guard-esque.

>>30583600
...wat the hell are you talking about? No one said trips never happened you idiot.

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>>30583532
Lurk more pls

>>30583634
They've been making fun of twilight and colon since they arrived with their moonpone codecs.

>>30583646
>wat the hell are you talking about? No one said trips never happened you idiot.

of course trips happened. are you retarded

>>30583532
>Neither are trips posts by that logic.

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>>30583634
>>30583665
>tfw been looking for a spooky, intimidating picture that could portray them well but can't find anything

>>30583668
I think you people are having an autism attack and missed the point somewhere, I am just gonna sit back and watch ya'll throw your shit at each other.

>>30583691
ms paint
be a creative faggot anon

>>30583703
Nigga I can't even write my name well.

<<30583698
>That will teach them!

>>30583706
you must try anon... for the all our sake.

>>30583279
You're in the wrong thread newfag. You belong in /hhh/

>>30583738
More like Marital Problems, but hhh is a good spot for him too.

>>30583024
Thanks for the update Lithonius. It's much appreciated. I think I've detected at least one variant in the world building. It's piqued my curiosity. I look forward to the next update.

>>30583839
>Guy calling people the bogyman again
Oh, its you again. You're back already to start shit?

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>>30584054
t. RGMAnon

Relax retard it's my first time using that word.
Did I rustled your jimmies?

>>30584080
Nah, just curious if that retard that was here over the summer got back in so soon.

>>30584054
>I can recognize anonymous posters with my awesome skills
>it's definitely all the same person

>>30584091
Not many people say RGMAnon except those shitposter we had awhile back when they were trying to get gay shining action.

Does anybody here know where I could find a fanfic with males being slaves to females, kind of like a reverse Fall of Equestria? I've been looking for such a thing all day, and this thread seems like my best shot.

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>>30584116

>>30584116
Nah, SiM is more your speed mate. That kind of trash isn't looked well on here. You could also try that shithole Fimfiction if that doesn't work.

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>>30584132
>standard prose is shit

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>>30584132
>Fimfic
>shithole
Some of us actually enjoy stories written in prose, Anon. With a main character that has an actual name.

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>>30584132

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>>30584145
but how am I supposed to empathize or even care about the main character if it isn't designed to be a self-insert?

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>>30584142
>>30584145
Hah

>>30584157
the captcha always makes me laugh like fuck

>>30584116
not unless you want furry and it only exists in fimfic

>>30584157
Normal people can empathise with a main character that has a name because they aren't robots, anon.
Are you telling me you're a robot? How did you get pass the captcha?

>>30584132
SiM is about the opposite.

>>30584116
No. But that IS an interesting concept. Kind of like how all spotted hyena males are subservient to even the lowest ranking females, even the cubs

>>30584145
Well a large portion of HiE stories are blatant self-inserts anyway so there's not really that big of a difference

>>30582757
The fur is a nice color but she's ugly as fuck am I right.

>>30584250
This. The only difference between the main character being called "Anon" or "Rasputin" is you put zero focus onto their name, which is arguably better if you're one of the rare few who don't automatically self-insert when you read the word "Anon".

>>30584275
I actually don't. Is that weird?

>>30584275
I have never self inserted.

>>30584289
Yes
>>30584298
Why are you even here.
>>30584275
FiMfic subhumans be gone!

>>30584116
Well, there is this oneshot with a slave Anon:

https://pastebin.com/iLXxSWQC

>>30584403
Ahahah, holy shit. It's stuff like this that makes me feel like a scumbag for not getting into older/dead writefags' bins more.

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>>30584275
>Razputin in Equestria

That actually sounds cool.

>>30584617
Good lord the shit he and Pinkie would get up too. I think I just shit my pants a little.

>>30584617
>>30584629
>Raz unlocks Ponk's mind
>Cenobite-esque entities come out.
>"The PONKS, You opened it we came!"
>"We are explorers in the further regions of Laughter. Demons to some, Angels to others.

>>30582838
The only real rules rgre needs is
1) follow the rgre theme to some extent
2) edge for edge is not appreciated, edge meaning a 2 post description on how you dismembered a things leg, not so much just violence happens, there is a clear difference between violence and edge.
3) if you are going to do something fetishy, use a trip, have 1 or 2 trips and when you want to do a fetishy story use the fetish trip so people can filter you. That way we can hopefully appease the autists, amd if you do something truly horrible everyone can filter you

Hell you could apply 3 to 2 as there have been a few edge stories that got my attention and kept it for a while. them going off the rails into needing oc armies is really all that kept me from finishing them.

All a story really needs is rgre, and preferably to have anon, beyond that I don't care, even without trips if something offends me so deeply I ignore it like an adult.

>>30583267
/b/ rules with a focus on porn, on top of being unlisted allows it to avoid a good place when you just want to avoid the mods and only real with no illegal content as rules.

>>30583112
Mods over on /d/ said all monstergirls are furry a year or so ago, so monstergirls on /d/ is pretty much a no go outside of 'monster girls' that wearing animal ears would turn you into them. looking though the monster girl thread, it's a bit sad there there is only 1 and 3/4ths of the thread aren't monster girls. There is a reason a lot of people moved over to trash.

>>30583748
I don't care where he goes, so long as it's not here. Him and the other homos can leave.

>>30583125
I don't mind this, but I'm watching you

>>30582970
>Herding is one of the damn standards in the thread. Nobody that actually goes here would take him seriously.

sad to say, it wasn't summer when that that guy was around here.

>>30583279
simple, people are pissy about any 'gay' thing even though this is rgre and 2 stallions going at it is every mares fantasy, they just can not bring themselves to go that extra step because it makes them feel weird in there no no places.

keep going and drive the autism out of the thread.

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I am accepting story ideas, though I cannot promise immediate results.

>>30585280
We've got 15,000 lines of prompts in the pastebin links, famalam. Take a look there and pick your poison.

Question. What do we do when LaP finally gets fed up with us and leaves? That brings us down to two semi-regular writers, one of which has issues IRL that are making writing difficult for him.

>>30585280
Ah, Bombshell.

I remember when I first pitched the idea of a dumbass blonde bimbo pony years ago.

It warms my heart to see that people ran with the concept and gave us such a beauty.

>>30585289
Maybe this godforsaken wish fulfillment general will finally die

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>>30585280
>>30582250
Anon earning the respect of a band of respectable, sea-learned gentle-ladies the hard way.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iuOGkY2dNOg

>>30585307
You're free to leave whenever faggot. You don't have to stick around here, you know.

>30585307
Maybe you'll learn to hide a thread newfag.

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Does anyone remember the names of the nerdpones often with Moondancer? I need them for greens.

>>30584706
>He has to stay horse virgin despite every one and thing trying to physically and mentally screw him, because Lilly would know/will know.
Mind shit and what have you.

I want so bad

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>"You don't like the taste of dick? What are you? A dyke?"

>>30585549
i guarantee the wiki has every detail of that episode noted.

>>30586121
Yeah, I found it. And have made surprising progress too.

>>30583024
I'm liking your characterization of Anon in this so far.

>>30586083
"Yes, I am a complete dyke Rainbow Dash, I'd rather eat out a mare than gargle some stallion dong."
>"But that doesn't make any se-"
"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to act like the dyke I am, sauntering off to find some hot mare to hook up with."

and that ladies and gentleman, is a bored, autistic bump

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>ywn bully the class nerd into doing lewd activities for you

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>>30586457
>tfw will never sexually bully qt nerdy mare

where's the bunker once this thread dies?

>>30586734
wot

>>30586737
where do we go when RGRE starts sliding past page 10? do our stories merge with AiE?

>>30585229
And everyone ignored him then too. The anti-herd fag has been around since our inception. He is one of our original memes.

>>30586806
>only one person in the world can hold an opinion
>there can be only one person who disagrees with me
>there can never be more than one person who doesn't like things i like

>>30585307
>Still mad the superior general is still standing
Choke on the mare tits bitch.

>>30586457
>>30586476
>ywn be the best (Chad?) in the school for nerdmares.
>>30586842
Kek, you know that argument only works when the thing you are arguing against isn't so popular in the thread. Its like saying you want less dicks in hhh, or less clits in the lesbo thread, or less bdsm from SiM, you don't go somewhere that specifically caters to that shit unless you like it.

>>30586798
That wont happen unless there is another obvious storm of shit threads made to kill us off again....or the mods come for one of our porn binges. But otherwise RGRE is going to stay RGRE. AiE is a shithole anyway.

>>30586083
>Rainbow was previously a kissless virgin fibbing in a hilariously hammy and obvious way about her sexual experience that she thought sounded cool.
>"Yeah gals I sucked his dick so good that he passed out."
>Then she starts dating you, and her friends can't tell the fibs from truth.
>"Yeah gals I don't even have breakfast anymore I just suck a fat load out of my guy. Check it out he rubbed some in my tuft now so now it smells like cock."

>>30586734
>>30586798
The bunker is inside your mom's asshole.
Shit's so loose she could probably fit ALL of us inside

>>30586734
AiE or make a Herd Thread and slowly make it RGRE.

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>Be Anon
>You were sitting in an outdoor patio to some very fancy restaurant having yourself a grand ol' time
>Not only were you eating some of the best sea food that you had ever tasted in your life, but you were spending time in the company of none other than the great Fleur de Lis
>Apparently her and Fancy had had a bit of a falling out, and the supermodel found herself without a stallion
>While such a thing would have ruined most ponies lives it was barely a even a thing for her
>Fleur could have her pick of pretty much any stallion she wanted
>Luckily for you she seemed to like tall, green, weird looking guys, and had taken a shine to you the moment the two of you crossed paths at the castle
>And you could tell she had brought her A-game with her today
>A new dress, perfume that you were pretty sure had aphrodisiacs in it, her mane and tail were trimmed and styled
>Since the two of you had sat down the unicorn had also flirted with you at every opportunity
>Saucy double language, heated looks, playing hoofsies under the table
>If you weren't such a fucking spaz you were sure your heart would have already been stolen
>But, as of that moment, you were just trying to remember to use full and complete sentences and NOT talk with your fucking mouth full
>Thankfully, you were succeeding on both fronts
>...Mostly
>"So, Anon, it must be awfully stuffy up in the castle," Fleur said, sipping on her wine as you ripped apart a lobster like a savage
"Oh, it's not that bad once you get used to it," you replied, tearing the lobster's shell in half so you could get at it's succulent meat. "Most of the staff are nice. Both of the princesses are pretty great too. The only one that's kind of a dick is Prince Blueblood."
>Fleur giggled as if what you had just said was the funniest thing in the whole world
>"I've heard rumors about him, my dear, and if even half of them are true it's no wonder why the prince cannot find himself a mare."

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>>30587563
>Love and Powercuddles.
>Fleur
Oh yes.

>>30583024
Where is the RGRE? This seems pretty normal.

>>30587620
Some moonfag autism cascade happened a few threads ago, and there are a few stragglers left over. Hopefully they'll go away if we ignore them.

>>30587620
Have you not seen Twilight's reactions to, well, everything? Half the story so far is her gawking over a stallion.

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>>30587563
>You were about to shove half of the lobster meat into your mouth when the supermodel leaned forward and placed a hoof over one of your dirty, butter soaked hands
>"Still, isn't the castle a little too cold for a stallion such as yourself?" she asked, her tone becoming huskier and her eyes becoming half-lidded. "Wouldn't you rather live somewhere--though just as fine and extravagant-- smaller?"
>She leaned forward just a hair more, licking her lips
>Blushing, you tried to lean your head back, only for an invisible force to stop you
>Your eyes snapped up to her horn to see the tip glowing
>Oh jeez...
>"You know, my mansion is a good deal smaller than the castle," Fleur continued. "However, there are quite a few rooms that are empty, and with Fancy gone I feel like my home needs a stallion to brighten it's halls."
>You tensed when you felt something brush against your leg
>It was her tail perhaps, or maybe her leg
>"So, if castle life ever becomes too troublesome, don't hesitate to--"
>One moment everything was fine
>You were just sitting there, hungry and flustered, listening to a really hot horse try to work her way into your pants
>The next second though...
>Wew...
>That was a fucking doozy
>A great big white blur zoomed across the patio
>It was so fast that no one had time to react
>You most certainly didn't have time to duck as it made it's way toward you
>You also weren't able to dive out of your chair as you felt two strong hooves grabbing the back of your shirt
>"DKJFNDKJNKJNK!"
>You were yanked out of your chair and sent flying out of your chair at such a high speed that your stomach felt like it had found a new home in your toes
>In the span of two seconds, you found yourself two hundred feet in the air, looking down at the city
>Which would have been wonderful if not for two things
>One: you were being stolen and all of that good ass seafood was gonna go to waste
>Two: you were scared of heights

>>30587653
god damn sunhorse staking her claim in the most pants shitting way.

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>>30587653
>Especially heights that were high enough to kill you
>And this was DEFINITELY high enough to kill you
>When the shock and confusion of the situation that you found yourself in finally wore off, you got to experience that kind of pants shitting terror that only came along once in a blue moon
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
>Your scream was so high pitched that dogs could hear it, and if you hadn't just used the bathroom you would have ruined this suit three ways from Sunday
"PutmedownputmedownputmedownputmedownohgodI'mgonnafuckingdie!"
>You flailed like you've never flailed before
>The air whipped around you as you looked around, trying to find a way to get back to the safe, solid ground
>This, unfortunately, made you realize just how HIGH you were, which only made you panic harder
"SweetfuckingChristI'mtooyoungtobeafuckingpancake!"
>You flailed some more, trying to grab onto something
>Luckily, your hands brushed against something soft and furry
>As fear crazed as you were, you had no idea what this soft and furry thing was, but that didn't stop you from grabbing it
>You grabbed onto the thing like your life depended on it
>Somehow, you even managed to wrap both legs around the thing, hugging it as tightly as you could
>This caused your face to come into contact with something that felt and looked an awfully like fur
>You barely noticed it however, so busy closing your eyes and praying to everyone that'd listen
"Ohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohsweetgod!"
>You didn't notice as your kidnapper slowed down their frantic pace
>You also didn't notice that you were flying toward Canterlot Castle
"Idon'twannadieIdon'twannadieIdon'twannadiepleasepleaseplease..."
>With a few flaps of her wings, your kidnapper was able to navigate the two of you toward a balcony, where the door just so happened to be open
"FUCKINGHELPMEDAMMIT!"

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>>30587653
>>30587752
Sunbut out of fucking nowhere.
>hfw some young whorse thinks she can muscle in on her territory.

>>30587653
At that speed and force, the shirt would've just ripped. And if it didn't rip, Anon would be a ragdoll thanks to his new broken neck.

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>>30587730
She's using her wings to pull off something a unicorn never could. If it were an earth pony or pegasus he were dating then she'd use her magic to show who's the real mare.

>>30587779
If Dash can survive her crashes without broken bones or worse most of the time, then Anon should be fine. Equestrian physics are strange like that. Just be careful, it probably is some kind of passive magical placebo. Like Looney Tunes, you'll be in trouble if you realize what should be happening.

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>>30587752
>With an aerial skill that would have leave you impressed if you had been in the right state of mind to be, your kidnapper swooped down toward the balcony
>Just as she was about to crash into into the door frame and closed her wings, using the momentum she had already gathered to propel you both into the room
"Mommmmmmma!"
>Unfurling massive, white wings, your kidnapper slowed you both to a screeching halt
>Your face was forced into her tuft as you both fell to the earth
>You braced yourself, your asshole puckering
>This was it...
>This was the big end...
>You didn't even have time to burn all of the porn you had hidden into your room...
>You let out a grunt of surprise as you hit something soft and springy
>A bed instantly came to mind, but how could that be?
>Realizing that you were no long flying, you began kicking and wiggling like a madman, trying to get out from under the not insignificant weight pinning you to whatever you were lying on
>Your kidnapper giggled, and with a bit more furious wiggling you were finally able to see them
>"Hello there, Anon," Celestia said with her usual gentle smile. "Fancy meeting you here."
>You stared up at the princess with wide eyes
"I, what, how, why, who--YOU KIDNAPPED ME!"
>Celestia, wrapping her wings around you, leaned down and rubbed her nose against yours
>"Don't be silly dear, I was just politely telling my little ponies to stay away from what's not there's."
>She let out a sigh, rolling the two of you over and wrapping her hooves around you
>"Now why don't we just lie here for a few moments? You seem to be shaking, and I can't have my favorite human catching a cold."
"I'M NOT COLD!"
>"Shussshhhhhh. Cuddles..."

~_~_~_~_~_~_~

>Be Fleur
>You, along with half of Canterlot, were watching as Princess Celestia took of with your date
>Your nose scrunched hard as you slouched in your chair
"That's not bucking fair..."

>>30587875
Alright, I'm done. When I was first doing aggressive cuddles I wanted to do Celestia, so here she is. Hoped you liked it

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>>30587882
>When I was first doing aggressive cuddles I wanted to do Celestia,

Good taste.

>>30587882
Can you do Moon Butt, Love Butt, and Spergle next?

>>30587641
How is that different from Twilight in other stories? 90% of the time she is a kissless nerd.

>>30587882
You are a god among men LaP, a god among men. Thank you for the green, it was both comfy and heartwarming.

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>>30587875
>>30587882
I enjoyed this.

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>>30587875
>Celestia will never kidnap you for cuddles

>>30587882
>Extra! Extra! Princess Celestia kidnaps stallion and cuddles him without consent in front of shocked crowd!
>Stallion heard screaming for help as he was flown back to Canterlot Castle!
>Princess refuses to comment, international community shocked and outraged!

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I want to ride on Celestia's back and cuddle her swan-like neck while she leisurely flies us through the sky.

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I want to carry Celestia in my arms like it were a puppy.

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>Foalsit Flurry often because the young alicorn responds well to more strictness than literally "none at all" like her other caretakers often try.
>And Shiny and Candy pay well too.
>At some point, you practically become part of their family.
>Being around both you and Shining gives Flurry a very skewed view on males.
>She's got her loving, honest, virtuous and family oriented father. A 1 in 10000 stallion.
>And she's her strong, prideful, protective, and self-sacrificing foal-sitter (read: 2nd father). A male who is totally unique.
>Flurry has just got you two and the polite but bland stallion castle staff to base her knowledge of stallions on.
>And it's a very enticing thought to her.
>When Flurry finally hits her teens and starts dating, she realizes all she knows are lies before her 3rd SNAFU of a date is over.
>She's been cheated.

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>>30589029
>She's got her loving, honest, virtuous and family oriented father. A 1 in 10000 stallion
He's a prissy bitch who got where he is by sucking the clit of every mare between his recruitment officer to the former Captain of the Guard, whose job he was given after accusing her of rape. He deserves no sympathy, no compassion, no positive portrayals. If you intend to use him in a story, portray him as a villain with no redeeming qualities save a particularly boot-shaped ass, suitable for Anon to shove his up while kicking him off the Crystal Tower. Please keep your greentext within the canon of this thread in future. Thank you.

>>30589074
>reeeeeee stop not using my head canon reeeeeee

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>>30589074
Don't forget
>And fucks her in the end

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>>30589074
I don't think this autistic hatred for anything that is a male character is normal, Anon.

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>>30589029
I like it senpai.

>>30587637
Why are you so upset about it. It was a good thing.

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>>30589393
You shouldn't have even acknowledged him.

>>30589393
I didn't even know that someone was having an autistic rage because of moon content.
I don't understand why but I guess I shouldn't have been surprised

>>30589074
i kinda agreed with the greentext but then i remembered he threw his sick wife at the final boss

>>30589074
Look, I'm all for prissy or flamboyant Shining Armor, but that's stupidly over the top.

>>30589565
the final boss who was holding the only thing that could rejuvenate her

and without his quick thinking spike could've died

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>>30589591

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>Anon's marefriends keep disappearing after just a couple of dates
>Not just leaving him, mind you; Nopony ever sees them again
>Even if it went well, they'd kiss him goodnight, head home, and never be seen nor heard from again
>Princess Celestia recently ordered an expansion to the Canterlot dungeon
>These two things are unrelated

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>>30589860
S I C
S E M P E R
T Y R A N N I S

>>30589029
> When Anon's son grows to adulthood, he finds Flurry an embittered, lonely mare
> He still has fond memories of her
> And from when he was starting puberty, more than a few sexual fantasies about the mare that used to babysit him
> Meanwhile, Flurry is worried Anon's wife is going to kill her for laying a hoof on their precious colt

>>30589860
>Anon thinks that it's his fault for being a bad man or something.
>What better way to make him know than stood him up.
>Anon in his best suit, the good tie, that cologne and his smile.
>Waiting for the mares.
>Just to sit there.
>Alone and sad.
>But who can blame them.
>Maybe something came up.
>While Anon sadly watch the candle on the table melt away, Celestia is trying her best to not go over there, wing-hug him, rub her recently brushed and fluffed tuft on his face an protect that smile once for all.
>He has to learn.
>Nobody has been, is or will be better than her.
>And Luna of course, don't forget Luna.
>She and your student, quote Anon, "Need sum fuk"
>And for what it looks, they need all the fuk he has.

>>30590005
>>Nobody has been, is or will be better than her.
what better way to convey that than to leave him to suffer in silence thinking hes unlovable

10/10 job celestia

>>30590152
No, don't you see? By destroying his self esteem, Celestia can set herself up as the 'one mare who really loves him'. He'd never cheat or turn against her out of fear of dying alone. She could get anal ALL the time from him.

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>>30590168
I never understood this weird obsession for anal.

This is why Luna is superior, she's a vaginal kind of girl.

>>30587563
>it was barely a even a thing for her
remove the first a*

>>30590183
She only wants to be impregnated again and again

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>>30590557
Damn, she's perfect.

>>30588119
>unless you make your female characters super thirsty or whores like daring do in lap's stories, it's not RGRE
yes, we need more greentexts full of nothing but the thought processes of a mare or stallion observing and cataloging interactions between the sexes.

>>30590557
when you say again and again, do you, perhaps, mean enough to fill the moon with her children?

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>>30590636
BUT OF COURSE

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Rarity has gone too far, and this time, it's personal.

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>>30590653
>BUTT OF COURSE
ftfy

>>30590671
>not rubbing her off
>then wiping her juices on her immaculate coat in petty revenge

>>30590671
What does magic taste like?

>>30590769
many things

>>30590769
Depends of the source it comes from.

>>30590769
>>30590782
>Anon somehow convinces twiggles with talk of science, pioneering, and exploring the unknown so close to them
>Anon volunteers to taste-test the horn emissions of every unicorn in town
>Argues that he has a wider palette because he's an omnivore
>Twiggles puts up a sign for volunteers
>Castle is surrounded the next day by the entire unicorn population of ponyville and surrounding towns
>[Anon's hand-rubbing intensifies].jpg

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>>30591000

>>30591000
>And alicorns.
>Cadence be a slut.

>>30591000
Sad to burst your bubble anon, but herbivores have a stronger sense of taste.

>>30591285
is that an actual fact? thought that was just a made up centaur thing

>>30591323
Yes, carnivores do not need that many taste receptors.
Carnivores cannot taste sweetness, for instance.

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>>30591325
>carnivores != omnivore

>>30591323
Herbivores have about 10,000 more taste receptors compared to us

>>30591345
This >>30591347

>>30591350
That doesn't change the fact that he's a retard for using carnivores as an example in an argument about herbivores vs. omnivores.

>>30591361
Let me clarify.
Taste receptors are used by herbivores to determine if a plant is toxic
Thus, animals who consume meat do not need as many taste buds, which in turn means that they cannot taste as many flavors as herbivores.
It stands to reason that humans, which are omnivores, the bastard stuck between carnivores and herbivores would have less taste buds than herbivores, but more taste buds than carnivores.
In actual research, horses have approximately 25,000 taste buds,
Humans, in comparison have approximately 10,000 taste buds
Large cats like lions have around 450 taste buds, meaning that they taste the least.

>>30591347 was additional information that I didn't want to post until I had confirmation.