Anonymous in Equestria Thread #1125

>>30468915
and suddenly I would've perferred a nyx OP

>>30468920
If that OC is from something autistic, it's news to me.
I just find it amusing.

>>30468934
>I just find it amusing.
I find it sexy.

Tripfags in Equestria

>>30468934
it's one of the danny phantom OC's ponified of tranny phantom who shot up a small cornershop

>>30468957
>It's ember as a pony
holy shit, anon u just made my dick even harder

>>30468915
I find this pic oddly arousing, so I guess this'll be my first trip to this thread. Have you guys actually ran 1124 of these things?

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>>30468957
Thought you were making shit up, but after a quick search it seems not. That's fucking amazing.

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>>30468977
Yes.

>>30468915
>PiE corner
what do PiE stories cover?

>>30469035
Ponies in Earth

>>30468965
>ember

that's not ember

OC =/= canon character

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>>30468957

>>30468035
I'm not certain this is what you're looking for, at the time I saved it there was no proper name and it was listed as incomplete(so even if this is it, it might not be all you remember). Skimming it didn't reveal a ton of Bonbon either, but it does open up with Lyra, a guy, and a park.

https://pastebin.com/9yzEKWPw

>>30469335
seeing as how pastebin will nuke inactive pastes, do we have an archive somewhere else?

>>30469359
Yes, though the scraping didn't start until a few years after /mlp/ began and so many Jesusaurus-old nuked things are missing from it. Besides searching for what/who you want, there's also an archive of absolutely everything that gets updated every few months.

http://mulpwiki.org/index.php/Main_Page

>>30469335
>>30469359
>>30469394
Go through the archives and find the thread that would have been up on 4/24/16.
You'll find what you're looking for at the end of a conversation similar to this one.

>>30469359
All those fetish stories. Lost to the ages.

Do we have any salt about Anon story?

>>30470237
An Anon made of salt or an Anon that is easily annoyed?

I want a story where anon cock vores fillies and colts around ponyville like a serial killer without the adults knowing.

Eventually it reveals to all be a dream but the fillies and colts remember it all

I wonder where FallAnon is... Hope you're doing alright mayne

>>30470444

How about an Anon made of salt who is annoyed about ponies licking him?

>>30470723
It's been done

>>30470744
Link

>>30470122
does you have the link to the fetishgreentext dropbox? does that even exist anymore?

>>30469359
>seeing as how pastebin will nuke inactive pastes
Will they? The pastebin faq page only says it's something they might do in the future.

>>30470571
I'm mostly alive, my department at work just lost some people so we've been short staffed. I was gonna try to update yesterday but didn't end up getting home until about 4 am. Gonna try again tonight if that doesn't happen again.

PUBLIC SPANKINGS

>>30471254
What did you do this time

>>30471342
Well, that's basically what Anoniaus gave Brass Bell. More than a spanking but not quite a beat down.

>>30471240
Understandable man, take your time. There's no rush :)

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>>30472325
>dont you mean pic related

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New writefag here from yesterday. My vacation has been extended a day, lucky for me, so I'll be writing and will post sometime next week. Sorry if you were waiting for a new green, but trust me it will hopefully be worth the weight.

For those who aren't interested yet/don't know what it will be about: I planned to write a one shot, my first fic ever, about anon and him having to deal with Midnight Blossom, captain of the Lunar Knights, harassing anon with raunchy jokes while watching over him. If you haven't read the fic I listed yesterday https://www.fimfiction.net/story/232554/how-many-lovers-have-you-made-today , Luna assigned her to him because she really cares about anon and doesn't want him hurt, though that won't be important to muh green. Also, if you do read that story, in this story the elements are not punished and anon will be more mentally stable.

Feel free to leave your opinions on this idea, I'll take any I can get. You know, to get more ideas :)

>>30472388
You should also post it to the bat pony general, I'm sure they'd like new writefags.

>>30472357
yes

>>30472399
Sure, I'll consider it.
I was only going to post here because I lurk this thread a lot and have never been over there, but I'll take a look

hey there, new writefag here. i have an idea for a story, just bumping the thread rn

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Since it seems I posted near the end of the last threads life, I shall repost.

For anyone lurking here that was in the Herd thread, I've posted Chapter 8 over on /gtpone/. My apologies for my extended absence.

Link to /gtpone/ in this bin: https://pastebin.com/1q40b9Y3 (embed)

>>30472914
Kay

>Page 10 already

We were promised new writefags.

>>30469359
Way to make me piss myself and make sure my pastes were still up.

>>30474142
We have to make sure our autism is preserved for future generations.

>>30474142
check some of the older stories. the writefags aren't reported as dead, the stories are just gone. for some reason they just disappear forever, and sometimes I want to reminisce about the early days of AiE.

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>>30475241
>tfw not old enough to be deleted
That's some bull

>>30469359
How long does piratepad keep?

>>30475896
I like the horse pussy edit better.

>>30468915
bump

>>30475241
From pastebins faq page:
>At this moment in time we do not delete pastes that do not have an expiration date. But in the future we might automatically delete pastes that have not been viewed by anyone in more than 6 months. Again, this is not something we are doing at this moment. But we might start doing it in the future.

>>30474142
I went and gave each one of mine a view just in case. Not sure what they count as inactive but another view can't hurt.

Well that answers that

>>30476753
Wat

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>Get a good idea for green
>Spend days thinking of various ways it could pan out, but don't push it because I'm still fresh off a story
>Finally start to write down a short outline, only to realize I've lost all interest in it

I know I'm retarded but come on.

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>>30477026
Dead due to butterfly infestation.

>>30477245
Try harder

>>30468915
bub

>>30478960
Yes Logan?

>>30478287
Nah, it can't feel like a chore otherwise I'll hate starting it.

>>30479810
Fine, geez

>>30476753
Thumbnail looks like it says live ded

Early bump thanks to autistic spam.

>>30452694


>Encased within the ceramite shell of your power armor once more you set off with Argent spear towards the training room.
>"Fair warning, some of the rookies are gonna be a little excitable. They're right out of basic and this is going to be their first combat exercise."
"I shall endeavor to make this experience a memorable one then. What manner of foes shall we face?"
>"Princess Luna always makes the final selections so nopony knows in advance. It's good practice for veterans and new recruits alike to make sure they can think on hooves."
"What sort of armaments shall we have at our disposal?"
>"Standard armor plus spears and shields. Since you have your own armor and sword you'll be allowed to use that and we'll provide a shield if you'd like one."
"I shall consider that."
>You come to the door of the training room which Argent spear pushes aside granting you a view of the interior.
>Ponies in training gamebsons are spaced out around the room practicing with training spears that have been blunted by thick rolls of cloth bound tight around the tips.
>Argent Spear clears his throat and bellows out the order for the guards in training to fall in.
>A few of them nearly fall over themselves in the rush to form an orderly line.
>If Argent spear is bothered by the clumsiness of his recruits he does not let it show.
>"At ease everypony. This is Anoniaus, he will be your acting squad commander for this evening's training exercise."
>"The Princess informs me that he is an experienced combat veteran and I expect you to obey his every order as if he were Captain Shining Armor himself."
>Argent Spear turns to you and asks quietly "Anything you'd like to add?"
>You take a step forward, letting one hand rest on the hilt of your sword your other arm curled around your helm at your side.
"It is my privilege to lead you on the field of war this day. Whatever challenge is set before us we shall overcome."

>>30481611

>You wish that you had same gift for speechcraft that Guilliman's sons seem blessed with, but you are the son of a father more given to action that words.
>With nothing further to say you take a step back and let Argent Spear speak once more.
>"Until further notice transfer of your squad has is transferred to Anoniaus." He turns to leave, patting the side of your armor with a hoof "Go easy on them."
>Argent Spear exits the room, leaving you alone with your new command.
"You may take your ease."
>The recruits relax somewhat as you take a moment to consider where to begin.
>To your knowledge you have only a few hours before the games begin, best assess their skills before then.
"Which of you can inform me as concisely as possible as to the extent of tactical training you have been given?"
>One of the ponies raises a hoof, a blue tinted unicorn mare.
"Speak."
>You say gesturing for her to go on. She looks rather proud of herself for having been called upon.
>"Other than spear and shield drills we've covered the phalanx and maniple formations."
"Excellent, that will save us much time. What is your name?"
>"Private Moondust sir." You nod making a mental note of this one.
"You are a unicorn I see. What are your magical capabilities?"
>She deflates somewhat at the question "I scored low average in magical attack and defense, but got high marks in augmentation."
"What sort of spells constitute augmentation? I am not well versed in the sorcerous arts."
>"Augmentation would be spells that alter the natural speed of an object or creature, or change a natural property of something."
>"She means she's good at speeding up the squad and enchanting weapons." You turn your attention to the new speaker.
>An earthpony mare, a bit taller and broader than many of her squadmates.
"Those sound like useful skills indeed."
>You say directing the comment to Moondust before returning to the earth pony.
"What is your name?"

>>30481625
>"Stone Sentinel" She says before tacking on a belated "Sir."
"Thank you for the summation."
>You look Stone Sentinel up and down. These ponies generally have seemed to have a name suited to their skill set.
>You feel confident enough about that to hazard a guess.
"Tell me, you are stronger than many of your squad mates, is that the case?"
>By way of reply she nods once. "Nopony has been able to knock me over during shield drills Sir."
>Her tone is largely devoid of color, no pride or brag, just a simple statement of fact.
"If that is the case you will make a fine center for our defensive line."
"Now, it occurs to me belatedly that the Lieutenant has neglected to give me directions about where we are to retrieve your arms and armor."
>Moondust is quick to answer once more. "We were all issued weapons and armor yesterday, they're currently in the barracks."
"Then arm yourselves and gather what provisions you made need. You have thirty minutes, we shall reconvene here."
>The ponies head out quickly at your command and you yourself head off in search of the armory.
>Argent Spear did say that a shield would be provided if you so chose, and without a ranged weapon at your disposal it seems a practical choice.
>Getting directions is a simple enough matter. You ask your way to the armory as well as the training field where today's games will be held.
>With that taken care of you head to collect a shield, though upon arriving you find that the selection of anything fir for someone of your size is slim.
>You had expected that would likely be the case.
>You eventually manage to find an aged round shield which will serve as an oversized buckler for you.
>The metal boss in the middle is dulled with age but unmarred by rust, and the faded paint on the shield depicts some manner of fiery bird against a white field.
>With that in hand you return to the training room. The recruits appear in ones until the squad of ten is whole once more.

>>30481637
"We will be heading to the training field early. I wish to take the available time before combat to evaluate the cohesion of this squad."
>A few of the recruits look like they can barely contain their excitement, and you can hardly blame them.
>You yourself were much the same at one time, though the order masters had done their level best to temper that enthusiasm with good sense and caution.
>Upon arriving at the field you find that yours is not the only squad to have taken up position early.
>Several other groups of guards are in position around the field either drilling or taking leisure.
>The field itself consists of a number of makeshift buildings sat upon a low hill. After taking a moment to survey the field you begin putting your squad through their paces.
>You make them march and run, ordering them to fall in to a phalanx at a moments notice only to break off again and continue moving.
>It is clear they are still fresh recruits but they have been well drilled in the basics at least. After an hour or so of practice you elect to give them a short rest.
>While they recovery from their exertions you head over to one of the other squads, greeting the sergeant present with a salute as you approach.
"What can you tell me of the procedure for these war games. I do not wish to inadvertently violate any protocol when we begin."
>"Generally the Princess will let us know what sort of threat we're facing when the game starts. Anypony that's "wounded" in the battle will be teleported out of action."
>"Also depending on how things are going once your squad has dealt with your threat you may be able to go aide another squad if they're having trouble."
"That is good to know, thank you."
>Before you can ask any further questions a trumpet sounds and Princess Luna appears on one of the many balconies studding the castles towers.

>>30481648
>"Greetings loyal soldiers of the Royal Guard. It pleases me greatly to welcome all of you, as well as the newest addition to our forces."
>Luna gestures to you an pauses for effect before continuing with her speech.
>"His arrival came as a surprise to us all, and as such I thought it fitting to make the foe of this game something new to the forces of Equestria as well."
>"This year you will defend a hamlet from creatures more adaptable and ferocious than any Changeling."
>You can hear murmurs of speculation from the guards around you.
>You don't have to speculate, you're almost certain what nightmare she's dredged from the depths of your memory.
>"This year your foe shall be Tyranids!" Luna cries out over the field. "You have twenty minutes to prepare before the battle begins."
>With that decree given most of the guards begin moving towards the Hamlet, though some squads are dallying, unsure of how to deal with a foe they know nothing of.
>The best way to get through this battle is going to be to take charge and give the ponies the benefit of your experience.
>It would seem that Luna intends to test more than just the combat prowess of the Royal Guard this day.
"Everyone, get to high ground immediately, begin fortifying the hamlet with anything available! Block the streets and limit the means of approach!"
>You direct your squad at double time towards the hamlet and quickly put them to work erecting barricades.
>You have your squad overturn a wagon and pile barrels and crates around it to block the central thoroughfare.
>Most of the other squads seem willing to comply with your orders but one of the other sergeants seems uncertain.
>"What the heck are tyranids anyway?"
>Still holding aloft the large stone you had uprooted from the ground to add to one of the barricades you answer as briefly as you can.

>>30481655
"They are unfeeling monsters only concerned with eating in order to propogate. If one falls it is simply replaced with another."
"They do not fear death or pain, they live only to serve the hive and feed. There is no reasoning with or driving off such beasts."
>A few of the guards look more nervous at that. Unfortunate, but it is best that you prepare them for what they are about to face.
"They will likely come at us in numbers, destroy the largest of the creatures as quickly as you can. The largest control the others."
>"Do you mean the biggest ones give the orders?" Moondust asks the piece of lumber she was levitating seemingly forgotten in the air above her.
"In a manner of speaking, but these creatures are more like the insects of a hive. Without the largest ones to control them the weaker ones may well turn on one another."
>One of the sergeants speaks up at this point.
>"Look if they're like insects they can't be much worse than the changelings, I don't think this is anything to get too worked up over. Just stick together and"
>Whatever he was going to say dies in his throat as a defeaning bellow sounds in the near distance, deep enough to set some of the windows in the mock houses to vibrating.
>"What makes a sound like that?" You hear someone ask quietly.
"That would likely be their leader. Now form ranks to guard the streets and be wary of attacks from above or behind. They tend to be skilled leapers."
>One of the guards in your squad peeks over the barricade in the direction the sound came form. "Oh buck, there's so many of them!"
>You step up to the barricade to look out at the enemy as well. Hormagunts dozens of them.
>Each one less than an average man in height but possed of scything blade like talons, a secondary set of arms, and a mouth full of dagger like fangs.
"Form doube ranks, first sheilds foward, second high to guard those in front! Ready spears and attack on my mark!"

>>30481780
accidentally posted that one before spell checking, so it's still full of errors.

>>30481780
>Some of the recruits are visibly shaken, but rush to follow your orders all the same.
>A few of the other sergeants have adopted your strategy and are order their troops up in a similar manner. That is good, they may survive this initial assault.
>The first of the hormagaunts bursts in to view around the corner of a building.
>They could likely have torn down or scaled the barricade with little effort but their drive to feed has led them down the path of least resistance.
"Hold!"
>You bellow as the hormagaunts close in.
>A dozen meters away the creatures leap for the shield wall seeking to crush your squad beneath their pouncing weight so they might feed.
>The creatures sore through the air with deadly accuracy.
"Mark!"
>At your command your squad stabs out as once, skewering the creatures and driving them backward away from the shield as they fall.
>You step around to the right flank of the shield wall,the weakest position in a phalanx since each man protects the man to his left.
>One of the illusory creatures your squad skewered kicks and squirms its way to its feet once more rushing forward.
>You punch out with the edge of your shield smashing its brown before splitting in bodily in two with a downward swipe of your sword.
>If these are meant to be a simulation of real enemies then this is a damned fine blade.
>The next attackers are already incoming and you shout the order once more, your squad lancing them from the air as they try to strike.
>From behind you hear shouts of dismay and a pop of displaced air. Looking back you can see that half of another of the squads has fallen, including their sergeant.
>The "survivors" are fighting a desperate bid to stave off hormagaunts that are trying to tear through their defenses.
>"Sentinel you have the line, I must secure our flank."
>Without awaiting acknowledgement you sprint towards the embattled guards.

>>30481932
>Throwing all your body weight against the beast you drive it against once of the barricades causing it to dissipate like the other slain creatures.
>Seeing your attack the defenders begin to rally and manage to drag more of the creatures down with a furious volley of thrusts.
>You lay about you with your enchanted blade dispatching the rest.
>With the area secure for the moment you spare a glance for the other squads. Most seem to be holding with minimal losses, your own still entirely intact.
>You see two squads guarding one of the larger streets together and call out to the Sergeant.
"Re position a squad to relieve this one, the other should absorb this squad into their own."
>You hold position long enough to make sure the others aren't attack while carrying out your orders them return to your own squad.
>"They seem to be slowing down sir." Moondust comments as the flow of attackers slows.
"Then they are preparing to send in something more dangerous. Be vigilant."
>The roar of approaching enemies tells you how right you were. More Hormagaunts led by a pair of Tyranid warriors, other squads will likely be facing similar threats.
>The warriors stand nearly half again your height and much like the smaller ones have a pair of scything talons.
>In their more humanoid hands they wield curved sword like extrusions of bone and chitin, likely some horrible parasite grown by the tyranid hive mind to pass as a weapon.
>"Destroy the larger ones, aim for their heads!"
>You cry out for all to hear, your vox amplified voice carrying out even over the din of the battlefield.
"Moondust can your magic slow the larger ones?"
>"I think so. I mean I've never tried in actual combat practice before and I" You cut her off before she can begin to ramble.
"If you can then do so. Worry about nothing else, we shall see to your defense."

>>30482032
That's all for the moment. Wanted to get a bit more out at once than usual since I made everyone wait. I've got a game to go to tomorrow but I'll try to have more up Monday.
Here's the updated pastebin.
https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe

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>>30482055
>tyranids
aw yiss.

>You will never be Anon in Equestria.
>You will never have angry debates with Twilight.
>You will never make fun of Applejack for doing manual labor all day.
>You will never call Rainbow Dash a cunt and then explain to her what cunt means.
>You will never then call her retarded for not knowing.
>You will never ditch a Pinkie Pie party.
>No, you seriously can't ditch. You'll try and then she will tie you to a chair and make everyone pretend nothing is out of the ordinary. The erection this gives you will be purely coincidental.
>You will never avoid Fluttershy completely because you do not want to get on the wrong side of Discord.
>You will never take a dump inside of a shoebox and hide it somewhere inside Rarity's house.


>Why live?

>>30481491
What was it this time?

>>30482055
Fantastic battle scene, and I always look forward to more. Keep it up, I've been reading since the beginning and I'm with you till the end.

Page 9 bump.

traveling bump

>>30468915
moonie when

>>30482055
neat

>Neverending street signs captcha
Holy shit, fuck you cap, I'll post it when I get home

>>30483176
Happening again

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>>30487356
That's why I use the legacy captchas- once and done.

>>30487630
I wonder if my paid 4chin still works.
Bought it because some fucktard spammer got the ip range for Charter here banned a while ago.

>>30468915
bump

>>30487356
The worst hell.

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>>30485170
Tell you what, YOU write something then I will.
At least 1 full post.

>>30482055
Thanks for the update. Good character exposition and scene setting.

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>>30489224
Clop?

>>30489498
I'm not writing clop but you write what you will.

>>30489503
>attempting to write story involving a /ss/ clop
>accidentally close text document without save

>In the forgotten countryside where fields of gold blend with hills of green, sits a quaint little town quiet and blue.
>The ponies in Ponyville find much in their name; frequently matching the marks on their butts or colors of their mane.
>To them the outside world was a place to vacation, so simple and plain, while the day to day chores repeated each day bringing more of the same.
>Then came the town’s big day where the Princess, whose kind rule brought sunshine to all, would hold the biggest ceremony of the year in the most unlikely of places.
>Ponyville held feast and party in celebration, but what came were horrors long told in imagination.
>Nightmare Moon, the elements and a worldly fascination turned the once sleepy village into a household name.
>Trouble came frequently, some would say weekly, and despite their efforts the town grew extremely.
>Not a city, but a hamlet no more, soon amplified by a stranger knocking at the door.
“Hello, my name’s Anonymous,” spoke the man never heard of before, “I come bearing gifts; gifts galore.”
>The pony in purple who was regarded as the cause tilted to the side the horn on her head.
>”What kind of gifts?”
>The man chortled and smiled with glee.
“Information, ammunition, histories and more. Knowledge beyond your wildest dreams. All I ask in return is some magic for me.”
>A hefty promise especially to one as studious as her, yet there was also skepticism of this nowhere man.
>What validity did he have? Were his promises to be trusted? Did half of what he said have their value adjusted?
>And what of the exchange requested? Magic is free.
>”Some magic for you?”
“Oh yes, most sure. I have none you see and simply want a small sum. To be able to fly, to have fireballs to cast; I’m sure everyone involved would have a blast.”
>An impish grin followed his statement that would have put anyone on guard though for the girl in front of him it was largely ignored.

>>30489676
>”You get the magic you are born with. Magic is natural, it cannot be learned or taught.”
“But I wish to be a wizard. I’ve trained for thirty years.”
>”I’m sorry, I can’t help you.”
>While most would be defeated as Twilight went to close the door Anonymous was not with an idea on his mind and put up his hand in a request that she listen.
“Those necklaces you found gave you the magic to return a wicked sister into her humble self. Six ponies, two of each type, casting a spell as one is the first of its kind. Here, I think, is the solution I’d find.”
>Twilight hummed and she hawed, a hoo and a hee before finally she came to agree.
>”I suppose it is worth a shot.”
>So she gathered her five other friends, to cast their magic at a supposedly innocent man.
>And when the beam struck their target, tested and true, Anonymous the never before seen became Anonymous the never again seen.
>Some suspect Anonymous never even existed; a rumor to spread further interest in the tourist economy.
>Others believe he is still out there hiding somewhere and organize wild hunts in hopes of finding him and his treasures.
>The few who actually saw him on that fateful day have since kept their mouths shut for the same questions from outside ponies came every day.
>And as for the girls, it is a skeleton they keep firmly buried in their closet.

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>>30489676
>>30489678
I like thing

>>30468915
When was the last time that the Stories sorted by Ponies and Master list were updated?

>>30489940
We've always done it that if you wanted to get added to those, make a post. Otherwise, it's too many lists to keep track of. The only one that should be active regularly, is the active list.

Though, 8th has slacked on that big time. Though, we also post less green than we did.

>>30489224
Aight.
I'm stuck at work but I'll come up with something

>>30490432
Awww, that's just adorable. Where can I get one?

>>30490359
>Though, we also post less green than we did.

Wouldn't that encourage frequent updates since there's less shit to add?

>>30490906
Most pet stores sell them. I'm not sure if they come in people sizes though.

>>30489678
10/10 zecora would be proud

>>30491518
Nah, they sell cat litter by four gallons here for thirty dollars. Surely that is enough for someone to take a shit.

>>30491244
I guess it depends how you look at it. I recall some people complaining when the active list looked bare when updated, maybe that's why.

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>>30490359
it's sad to think that i'm getting into AiE at the tail end of the phenomenon.

>>30494512
It's sad knowing I might miss the final fight between Mandroid and 8th to the death over being the last member of the old guard.

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>>30494661
>I've left.

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>scholars and astronomers alike begin studying the moon in great depth and detail through powerful telescopes
>find bright blue lakes and beautiful green forests
>near the end of her thousand year banishment they begin to even see signs of civilization and villages

>>30495660
ok

>>30468915
bep

>>30494512
It's still a pretty satisfying ride.
I have no regrets for the time I waste here.
I love you all. Past and present.

>>30496019
Faggot

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>>30494512
This is not the end. What is dead can never die.

>>30494661
Mandroid first paste: 5/5/2012
8th first paste: 2/3/13
I was old before 8th was a mistake running down a Kangaroo's face.

>>30494512
Also chill out, Anon. I wouldn't say we're near the end of the "phenomenon" or whatever. Things clip along as they always have, new writers come and go, and stories keep getting written. Lack of proper clerical duties doesn't mean a death, it means that 8th has other shit going on, probably school. The more you worry about having less time to do things, the less things you'll get done. Just blast through it and have some fun.

>>30496195
I was referring to the fact that you two are the oldest fags we got. Not making it over who had been here longer.
I hope 8th wins.

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>>30496195
>probably school.
How old do you think I am?

>>30496234
>>30494661
If you were a betting man, you'd bet on Mandroid. I'm a cunt, not a fighter.

>>30496195
but without an archive, how can anyone know we were even here? how can anyone look upon the works we've created?

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>>30496258
I unno, 20?
I would also like to take this time to state that I am both a cunt and a fighter. I have the belts to prove it.

>>30496260
We have an archive though. The thread archive keeps getting updated, it's just that nobody figured what a MASSIVE undertaking it is to maintain an active list.

>>30496305
No one has the time or willpower to read through and catalogue THAT MUCH autistic horsefiction.
It would break lesser men.

>>30496338
Which is why we put a subhuman aboriginal in charge of it. If he succeeds, we get what we want and if he fails, we get to watch him poop himself.

>>30496350
Either way he has to stay in his own polluted corner of the gene-pool.

Love you really 8th.
I don't though.
But actually I do.
Not.

>>30496365
Maybe he'll get lucky and get attacked by saltwater crocks.

>>30496399
Maybe the saltwater crocs will get lucky and not get any of his blood in their mouths.

>>30496195
By strange coincidence, my first paste was also 5/5/2012!
We're pastetwins

Mandroid first paste: 03:14:39 AM CDT
Zuul first paste: 05:46:12 AM CDT
You're still older by 2 hours, 31 minutes, and 33 seconds.

>>30496258
I got you pegged at 30.
Heh, pegged

>>30496461
Who the fuck are you?

20th Feb
• "Anon and the Misleading Story Title" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/39ymYnfz]
• "Anonpencil Writes Drunk: Spare Some Change" by Anonpencil [https://pastebin.com/gMbaTUL4]

23rd Feb
• "Love is (not) in the Air" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/PqUdUu9k]

25th Feb
• "The Surprising Adventures of Sir Anonymous Beef Wellington" by Iceman [https://pastebin.com/S6ab29n1]
• "Love is (not) in the Air" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/PqUdUu9k]

26th Feb
• "Anon in Saddle Arabia's pony prison, chapter 9" by Wand of Inferno [https://pastebin.com/cPezbUZh]

1st Mar
• "Anon and the Misleading Story Title" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/39ymYnfz]

2nd Mar
• "Love is (not) in the Air" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/PqUdUu9k]

3rd Mar
• "Anniversary" by CasualAmateur [https://pastebin.com/ghMMTrv8]

6th Mar
• "The Anon who didn't steal Hearths Warming" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/5pJw3SvZ]

7th Mar
• "Anonpencil Writes Drunk: It's Always an Option" by Anonpencil [https://pastebin.com/0WqB8317]

9th Mar
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

10th Mar
• "Anon Escapes From Jail With The Surprise Adoption" by Saint Dane [https://pastebin.com/LYtY9RFN]
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

14th Mar
• "Last Resort...uhm, are you okay with that?" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/VU7M1HQ8]
• "Space Anon, an anon in space but not really" by Zew [http://pastebin.com/927ghgKF]

15th Mar
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

16th Mar
• "Last Resort...uhm, are you okay with that?" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/VU7M1HQ8]
• "Anon in Equestria Comedy Harem Story" by TommySpud [https://pastebin.com/3ARqALP6]

>>30496050
Y-you too.

>>30496575
17th Mar
• "Anonpencil Writes Drunk: Who's Your Daddy" by Anonpencil [https://pastebin.com/bcPkrmL9]
• "Anon in Saddle Arabia's pony prison, chapter 9" by Wand of Inferno [https://pastebin.com/cPezbUZh]

18th Mar
• "Last Resort...uhm, are you okay with that?" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/VU7M1HQ8]
• "Anon, Lyra St. Pats Day prequel thing" by >rope [https://pastebin.com/WfBUHPDG]

20th Mar
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]
• "Last Resort...uhm, are you okay with that?" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/VU7M1HQ8]

21st Mar
• "Anon in Equestria Comedy Harem Story" by TommySpud [https://pastebin.com/3ARqALP6]

22nd Mar
• "Familia 8: Advanced Placement" by Mandroid [https://pastebin.com/P3v8s0Sa]

24th Mar
• "Anonpencil Writes Drunk: Rarity Makes You Beautiful(oneshit)" by Anonpencil [https://pastebin.com/NDknGwVE]

25th Mar
• "Last Resort...uhm, are you okay with that?" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/VU7M1HQ8]

26th Mar
• "A Word of Caution" by 8th-Sin [https://pastebin.com/an8K3ABh]
• "Moonie Shorts" by 8th-Sin [https://pastebin.com/5WWqvqra]

27th Mar
• "Space Anon, an anon in space but not really" by Zew [http://pastebin.com/927ghgKF]

30th Mar
• "Last Resort...uhm, are you okay with that?" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/VU7M1HQ8]

31st Mar
• "Trixie&Anon Stories: Part 1" by GSW [https://pastebin.com/AhF8AnNw]

2nd Apr
• "Thread Bumpers: Crimes Against Humanity" by FgtWtKybrd [https://pastebin.com/n99ESMaA]
• "Last Resort...uhm, are you okay with that?" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/VU7M1HQ8]

3rd Apr
• "Trixie&Anon Stories: Part 1" by GSW [https://pastebin.com/AhF8AnNw]

4th Apr
• "TenochtiCon" by Not Actually Rosenkreutz [https://pastebin.com/7GVkWvnW]

>>30496579
5th Apr
• "Last Resort...uhm, are you okay with that?" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/VU7M1HQ8]

14 Apr
• "Anon in Saddle Arabia's pony prison, chapter 9" by Wand of Inferno [https://pastebin.com/cPezbUZh]

17th Apr
• "Pilot Anon" by An Advocate [https://pastebin.com/XmqPUgZ9]

19th Apr
• "Anonpencil Writes Drunk: Turning Japonies (Oneshit) by Anonpencil [https://pastebin.com/E91rKpge]

21st Apr
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

23rd Apr
• "Familia 9: Lil' Matchmakers" by Mandroid [https://pastebin.com/EsYNxA2Q]

24th Apr
• "Living The High Life" by Flutterpriest [https://pastebin.com/J7CpqzxW]
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

26th Apr
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

28th Apr
• "Current Events (One Shot)" by Lulzies [https://pastebin.com/x1ZPyHsh]

30th Apr
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

2nd May
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

4th May
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

7th May
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

8th May
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

10th May
• "Anonpencil Writes Drunk: Cleanliness is Next to Godawefulnes" by Anonpencil [https://pastebin.com/UpCVazrZ]

1th May
• "For the love of Anon" by TITANICTIME2 [https://pastebin.com/FbTDi5Gm]
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

15th May
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

17th May
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

20th May
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

>>30496580
23rd May
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

24th May
• "Familia 10: Teenage Dirtbag" by Mandroid [https://pastebin.com/yCEcr7Dq]

25th May
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

29th May
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

30th May
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]
• "Anonpencil Writes Drunk: Just Blowing Bubbles (Oneshit)" by Anonpencil [https://pastebin.com/2mq6JPw5]

31st May
• "MLP Friendship still involves Anon" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/Vct2bPj3]

1st Jun
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

2nd Jun
• "MLP Friendship still involves Anon" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/Vct2bPj3]

3rd Jun
• "One Shots 2: Electric Boogaloo (One Shots)" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/z5nuQZ6Y]

5th Jun
• "Anonpencil Writes Drunk: A Singular Tale (oneshit)" by Anonpencil [https://pastebin.com/q8RZusWx]
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

7th Jun
• "MLP Friendship still involves Anon" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/Vct2bPj3]

8th Jun
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

10th Jun
• "MLP Friendship still involves Anon" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/Vct2bPj3]
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

13th Jun
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

14th Jun
• "Legends of Magic: The Green Guardian" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/LXLR92Tq]

>>30496581
15th Jun
• "Living With Colgate ii: Living With Pinkie Pie" by Zuul [https://pastebin.com/CHGRPv2Z]

16th Jun
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

18th Jun
• "Anonpencil Writes Drunk: Pinkie Pie Is A Balloon (Oneshit)" by Anonpencil [https://pastebin.com/PTCz8JEh]

19th Jun
• "One Shots 2: Electric Boogaloo" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/z5nuQZ6Y]

20th Jun
• "Anon is stuck as a slave to roman griffons" by !!rJzy4zXrKAv (4th) [https://pastebin.com/dVw9prrk]
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]
• "Familia 11: TNG" by Mandroid [https://pastebin.com/30xufVh7]

22nd Jun
• "Moonie Shorts" by 8th-Sin [https://pastebin.com/5WWqvqra]

23rd Jun
• "Living With Colgate ii: Heat Wave" by Zuul [https://pastebin.com/DrRPY13i]

25th Jun
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

26th Jun
• "One Shots 2: Electric Boogaloo (One Shots)" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/z5nuQZ6Y]

27th Jun
• "Anon goes to a Party" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/s1zLTgyP]
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

28th Jun
• "MLP Friendship still involves Anon" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/Vct2bPj3]

29th Jun
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

30th Jun
• "A Magic Touch" by TextingWithGreen [https://pastebin.com/5gQ5hMeU]

1st Jul
• "Legends of Magic: The Green Guardian" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/LXLR92Tq]

4th Jul
• "Fallen in Equestria" by Fallanon [https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe]

6th Jul
• "Anon goes to a Party" by He-Anon and the Masters of Equestria [https://pastebin.com/s1zLTgyP]

>>30496501
>>30496305
Not posting my age because fuck you, but you're both wrong.

>>30496365
>Not.
And let's keep it that way.

>>30496575
>>30496579
>>30496580
>>30496581
>>30496591
See kids, all you need to get what you want is to call old Uncle Mandy to have him beat the mean old Ostrich with his belt.

Also I know you've told me you had to fuck off for schoolwork before you cunt.

>>30496616
Yeah, I just make shit up to get rid of you.

>>30496621
You're a better man than me being able to parse out and organize all of that into a neat list.

>>30496637
At least you're writing. Faggot.

>>30496675
At glacial speed but fair enough.

>>30496686
>Glacial
nigga you in the arctic over here

>>30496695
I'm from the American south, you should be impressed I can read, let alone write.

>>30496553
I was waiting for it

>>30496621
You can't get rid of me, we're the last two left. You are nothing without me.

>>30496839
I'd rather be nothing.

>>30496993
Look down your pants, that feeling can't be too far off.

Everyone knows that this thread is just one man arguing with his tuplas. None of us are real.

>>30497107
I pity that man. Tis a fate worse than death by snu snu.

>>30496501
>Heh, pegged

>You weren't quite sure how it happened, but somewhere along your new life you picked up a fuckbuddy.
>Which wasn't odd in and of itself, with all that horse pussy on display it was bound to happen.
>The odd part was the horse you ended up with.
>"Hey Nonnapuss!"
>She was completely insufferable at times, and way too energetic at all times.
>But daaaayum was she an animal in the sack.
"What brings you here this early Panka, I thought the fun wasn't until tonight."
>"There's always time for fun, silly, but that's not why I'm here."
>Her expression was oddly serious, something must be going on.
>"Can we try something different tonight?"
>'Something different.'
>The phrase burrowed into your brain.
>You've already tried every combination of holes and positions either of you could think of.
>What unholy abomination has surfaced in the maddening expanse of her mind?
"Did you have something planned?"
>"Yup! Here, drink this."
>Her usual perky demeanor returns, and she's pulled a potion out from somewhere.
"...What is this gonna do?"
>"It's gonna get you ready for tonight, of course! Zecora says it should be safe for humans."
>She was up to something.
>This was the first time she's pulled your sex life into things, but she was up to something and knowing her she won't stop until she gets what she wants.
>You can only hope it won't be anything too horrible.
"...Fine, but this had better be worth it, you pink troublemaker."
>Snagging the bottle, you pop the cork and down it fast, trying to avoid tasting it.
>Zecora can accomplish many great things with her potions, but making them not taste like ass seemed beyond her power.
>The Ponkster watches intently until you swallow the mixture.
>Once it's down, she smiles big and zips away, coming back in long enough to give you a cheerful "See you tonight!"
>So now you had all day to ponder what new lewdness was in store for you.

>>30497185
>Aside from the asstacular aftertaste, the potion hasn't had any immediate effect that you've noticed.
>For all you know you're gonna end up growing a second dick or something.
>Penk hasn't shown any interest in adding any additional partners to the funtimes, but she'd probably love a good DP.
>Fingers, fists, and toys can only do so much compared to a proper double dicking.
>Or maybe you'll get a four foot prehensile penis.
>Anyone in town that might know what's in store for you is undoubtedly sworn to secrecy.
>Still, you had some shopping to do, and a visit to town would pass the time.
>Putting on some proper clothes and grabbing some bits, you venture out into the streets of Ponyville.
>All the usuals were out and about doing their usual things.
>You spend some time chatting with the flower trio, picking up the latest gossip.
>Nothing related to you or Panko, of course, but it was worth a try.
>Those three were the only ones remotely likely to spill any beans they knew about, so the rest of your trip was far more relaxed.
>A trip to Golden Oak for some fresh reading material, the market for some cooking supplies, and Sugarcube Corner to check on Pingie.
>Along with assorted chats with the ponies you're friends with.
>By the time you get back home, you've got just about enough time for your usual funtime preparations.
>A good hearty dump and piss to ensure those bodily functions don't get in the way of things, and a shower to clean up the day's sweat and grime to make way for the night's sweat and grime.
>You're lounging about in your bathrobe when Punks arrives.
>"Sorry I'm late Nanners, a big last minute order came in, and then the guy tried to leave without paying! Why would somepony want to steal fourty cakes?"
"Because they're terrible, obviously. So am I allowed to know what the something new is yet?"
>She grins that big stupid grin of hers as she answers.

>>30497187
>"Yupperoni! I'd been doing some Pinkie Thinking last night, and it occured to me that there WAS a hole we missed. Yours!"
>Is she--
>"So I went to Zecora's and asked if her Butt Fun potion was safe for humans, and it was! Probably. Did you notice anything bad from the potion?"
>She is.
"Aside from the taste, I didn't really notice anything. What's it supposed to do?"
>"Weeeell, it does just about everything you need to put the fun in butt fun. Cleans out your poo so you don't make a mess, lubes things up so it's smooth sailing, and makes things extra stretchy so you don't have to worry about bleeding out from a shattered shitter. Plus it leaves your tush smelling minty fresh! Didn't you ever wonder why it was never a hassle when you fucked my butt?"
"Honestly, with you ponies I just sorta figured all that was normal. Or you were just a dirty little buttslut."
>Panko giggles.
>"You always say the sweetest things to me Nona, that's why I'm your slut."
>She giggles again, louder this time.
>"But I suppose that tonight, YOU are MY slut."
"Hold up a minute, Pinkie."
>Your use of the super secret grownup time codeword that is her name instantly has her sitting still like a normal pony instead of bouncing around excitedly.
"Just because I drank some mystery potion you offered me this morning doesn't automatically mean I agreed to let you have fun with my butt. This is something we both have to decide on. I'm not sure how it goes with you ponies, but humans aren't generally big on male butt fun."
>"Hmm. Well I don't know about generally, but all the stallions I've had butt fun with turned out to be total buttsluts behind closed doors."
>Rrreally.
>You'd have to see if you can squeeze some names out of her sometimes, that is some prime gossip material.
"And how many is that?"
>She starts counting on her hooves, but gets confused after she runs out of hooves.
>"Uhh, more than four. So have you decided?"

>>30497189
>Serious time is wearing off, you can see her butt starting to wiggle around again.
>With a long sigh, you speak the words that will likely seal your fate.
"We can TRY, but if I don't like it, we're stopping."
>"Heheh, that's exactly what all the others said!"
>Well crap.
>Popo hops up at you, pushing you from your reclining position and laying you flat on the sofa.
>Mostly flat, anyway, pony sofas weren't quite long enough for all of you.
>At least the armrests were well padded, makes for a decent pillow.
>Your assaulter has meanwhile turned around and sat on your chest, giving you a full view of her goods.
>In true funtimes fashion, she was soaked and winking.
>She didn't sit close enough for you to reach with your face, so you start teasing with a finger.
>Tracing along her outer edges, giving her winker an occasional boop.
>Once you've hit peak boner, Pinka starts her own teasing.
>A kiss, a lick, a few shallow bobs.
>You start slipping a finger in, her bobs start going farther down the shaft.
>It was a game of foreplay chicken; see who could get the farthest along without it turning into one of the primary events.
>Not that there was really any way to tell who wins.
>Like most games, it was having fun that mattered.
>And from the speed of her winking, she was having plenty of fun.
>Speaking of fun...
>Getting your free hand ready, you give her three fingers to the hilt, then another two in her ponut once she goes balls deep on you.
>Her muffled squeak of surprise ripples along your length as she wriggles against the unannounced intrusion.
>She slides you back out of her mouth and turns to look at you, panting for breath.
>"Impatient for the main event, are we? Okie dokie!"
>Not waiting for an answer, she turns back to the task at hand.
>A long, slow lick starts at your tip and makes it all the way down your shaft, past the balls, and is heading to parts untouched.

>>30497191
>Crazy stretchy poniWOAH!
>You've never had that hole licked before, and man is it a hell of a sensation.
>Once her face makes it to her destination, Penk finally gets up from your chest and follows her stretched out neck, settling in where it belongs on a pony that doesn't ignore physics.
>By now your general butt area is covered in pony saliva, and you can feel her pushing against your entrance.
>You try to relax as best you can, but those aren't exactly muscles you think about using all the time.
>Still, it seems to help, and you can feel her tongue slowly start to wiggle its way i-- HOLY FUCK!
>Your whole body tenses up as several inches of tongue suddenly push into you.
>Picking your head up, you look down and find yourself staring into a pair of blue eyes looking at you from behind your erection.
>Her eyes stay locked on yours as she starts to swirl around inside you, finding all the surfaces to rub against.
>She was clearly an expert at the anal rodeo, seconds stretched into minutes and she still hasn't run out of new sensations to show you.
>At some point that cute little curl in the front of her mane started rubbing up and down your cock, tracing little smily faces with your precum, but you barely noticed compared to what was going on in your butt.
>Finally, after what felt like an hour, her tongue retracts back in and she gets up to look at you.
>You were a sweaty mess, barely able to move aside from your twitching dick.
>"Weeeeell? Did you like it?"
"Y-yes."
>She lunges forward and gives you a buttsaliva kiss that you are in no state to try and fight off.
>"Oh, I knew you'd like it Nonny, I just knew it! Time for the main event!"
>A strapon gets pulled out from behind your TV and rapidly buckled into place.
>Once it's secure, Punki clambers into position, the tip of her silicone horsecock nestled against your waiting entrance.
>"So does my little buttslut want a big cock up his butt?"
"P-please."

File: it keeps happening.png (382KB, 720x720px) Image search: [Google]

382KB, 720x720px

>>30497196
>She applies a bit of pressure, but still doesn't penetrate.
>"What was that? I couldn't quite hear you."
"I want your big cock up my butt!"
>And you get what you want, your entrance stretching well farther than her tongue could manage as the toy inches its way in.
>The sheer fullness you felt was beyond amazing, but part of your mind managed to stay alert long enough to notice something bad.
>Pinkie had the look.
>THAT look.
>"I'm so glad you agreed to try swapping roles, Anon,"
>It was too late, you had no way to stop it.
>All you could do is helplessly watch your boner shrivel up and go limp as the pink pain in your ass finished her sentence.
>"I'd never have pegged you as a bottom!"

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>>30497198

>>30468915
bemp

>>30497396
Don't touch me with that.

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>>30497198

Where is Anon's sandwich.

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>>30489676
>>30489678
10/10, made my day

>>30498113
>be anon
>look for sandwich that you've kept in the fridge for lunch
>follow the trail of crumbs and ant ponies out of the kitchen
>glimmer is using the bread slices as some sort of castle fort
>the lettuce as trees on pretzel stick branches
>cheese is smashed up and molded like play-dough into tiny mishapen pony figurines
>tomato slices as fidget spinners
>no idea where the tuna went to
>juice box is already used

>fuck it, you go out and get hammered on some cider instead and chill with Dash. At least blue gay knows how to banter, glimmer is too off in her own world to pick up on anything.

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>>30498209
Not that sandwich.

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Actually got added to the list this time.

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how does AiE treat alternate universe settings?

>>30499909
The same way we treat our plot progression.
With our heads in the sand.

>>30499909
In the long ago past? Eh, not so great.
Now? The readers here are much more mellow and are happy to see green even of they don't enjoy it from what I've seen.

Post what you want son. We will read it as long as it follows 2 rules.

1) It has a character called Anon (though we have been flexible on this)
2) He is in Equestria. No real criteria on which version.

>>30469359
Bringing this topic back up, it seems the plan of deleting 6month old inactive pastes is going forward. Just got an email offering to upgrade to pro for a discount ending 7/12.

>>30499909
Technically everything we do here is alternate universe.

>>30498271
Subway raised its price to $6. He can't afford that sandwich anymore.

>>30496804
ahh yes, I remember you. You made neckbeard in horseland

1, 2, 3, 4, 5...
>You begin to count the spots on the speckled concrete wall again.
6, 7..
>You should not have spoken up. You should have just been an obedient guard and followed your orders.
11, 12, 13..
>You knew the rules about containment procedure. No subjects are allowed out of their cells unless it is given access by someone with higher authority.

57, 58..
>You get it. Anything here should be treated with caution. Ethics and morals do not merge well with science and experimentation. Emotion is the hindrance of scientific progress.
>.. but still..

64, 65..
>Lowly guards should just be on hand to make sure everything goes smoothly, and to prevent any possible outbreaks. They should think what is best for the safety of the association, not for any individual.

66, 67..
>You were going to die soon.
..

>You are awakened by the sound of banging metal.
>"Prisoner A-734! Hands behind your back, and do not make sudden movements."
>You comply with the orders and place your hands on your lower back, pressing the backs against the orange fabric of your orange coveralls.
>A sharp metallic click is heard, and the door slides open. The figure blocks most of the light from the hallway, but a little escapes past its form and shines into your bare, tiny cell.
>The guard was wearing the uniform required by all armed personnel. The boots were thick and resilient, and the fabric of the uniform was tough and spotless. A helmet covered the head, with a chin strap for support.

>The most jarring about the man was he was completely white from head to toe. Even the barrel of the gun pointed at your head was the color of snow.
>He pushed you to your knees, and cuffed your hands behind your back.
>"Prisoner A-734, you are under orders to come into cell D-86."
>The guard speaks harshly, and with gruffness in his voice.
>He throws you into the lit hallway, and orders your to follow. Another guard follows up behind you, weapon in arm.
What is in --
>"You do not have permission to speak 734! Shut up and keep your head level!"
>You close your mouth and do as you are told.
>The death march continues through the turns of the hallways, passing through rooms that felt familiar, and winding paths that were not.
>Eventually, they stopped you next to a large bolted door. The red hazard sign on it was plastered on the front.
>..Oh no..

>You don't think that you want to know what was in there.
>"Prisoner A-734 is present and at the gate. The door is clear and ready to be opened."
>The guard in rear spoke into his headset.
>You started to break into a sweat. The beads of water rolled down your back, making the white undershirt cling to your skin, and your palms became damp, which you curled into fists.
>You saw the lock on the gate slowly turn and unclamp the two halves, letting them slowly roll open.
>A kick from behind sent your face flying into the polished floor and you felt your head crack against the hard surface.
Son of a..
>You saw stars dance inside of your shut eyes, and shook your head to recollect your self. The sound of metal clanging behind you combined with the decrease in lighting told you that the door was shut behind you. Another gate was in front of you.

>Your heart rate started to increase at an alarming rate. You kneel over and put your hands on your knees trying to calm yourself down.
>A double gate. There is something serious inside of that cell.
>The crackling of an intercom gets your attention.
>"Prisoner A-734. You have been ordered to come into this cell. Your task is to calm and accompany subject # P-413. You are not to aggravate or harm the subject. You are not allowed to leave the room until authorized to do so. Do NOT provoke the subject for it can, and will, kill.
>You feel sick. You have officially been demoted to the lowest rank.
>You hear the turnover rate is high in these positions.

Why the hell should I go in there? And what is this subject?
>"734, this is not an option. You will go into the cell, and calm and accompany subject P-413. The information on the subject is classified."

>The metal gate is unclamped, and the halves are slowly rolled open. You force yourself to breathe deeply, and turn towards the cell, the metal on your cuffs cutting into your skin.
>The room was completely white, with no windows or any noticeable light source. It was hard to make out the depth and shape of the room with how monochromatic the place was.

>There is no one in here.
>You walk into the center of the cell and look around.
>Is this some kind of joke? Some trick?
>The rolling gate snaps shut behind you, which causes you to turn around.

>There is someone in here.

>It was a girl.
>Not just any girl. She was the most beautiful girl you've ever met.
>her eyes were a bright sky blue, and she had long, pink hair that hung down all the way to her thighs. She was wearing a t-shirt that cut off a little above her waist, which exposed her soft white stomach. It looked like her bust was attempting to explode out of her tight shirt, which was mostly hidden by her folded arms. Her short shorts where covering her lower half, with her slender legs sprouting out.
>You felt the blood in your cheeks making your face warm, trying to compose yourself.
>The only unsettling part about her was the death glare that she was directing at you since you first noticed her.

>You clear your throat, your brain trying to find words to form a cohesive sentence.
H-hey.
>Your vocal chords refused to stay steady.
>You feel a wave of rationality come to you.
>This girl looked like she wanted to slit your throat.
>You take a few steps back, gaining some distance between the two of you.
>Why was she in here? Why is she in such a secure cell?
>..what is she capable of?

>You decide to take the initiative. You need to try To calm her down. You start over.
Hey, my name is Anonymous, Anon for short. I was kind of.. thrown in here. I don't want any trouble, and I am just here to talk. What's your name?

>She grabs the collar of your coveralls and looks you dead in the eye. You didn't even see her move close to you, she was just there directly in front of you. She was a head shorter than you, which forced you to kneel down to meet her glare.
>"Listen "Anon". I don't like you. I really, really HATE you. We are not going to be friends. I hate everyone here, especially you. I HATE you."

>She lets go of your collar and you stagger back. You keep taking steps away from her until you feel your cuffs making contact with the wall. You slide your back down and sit down pulling your knees up to your chest, not looking away from the girl.
>You were locked in a room with a girl that wishes you were dead. You were sleeping with your eyes open from now on.

That's all I got for right now.

hello, dead writer here, just had a sudden inspiration to try and revise a story that I had written a long time ago, and hopefully finish, although I doubt it.

pastebin.com/u/aanon

pastebin if you want to read the full, older, unrevised story. It's titled "Befriending Pinkamena".

I hoped that you guys enjoyed it, and will try to write more in the following days if I can, although I'm a lot busier that I used to be. please provide any feedback so I can improve.

>>30503252
link your posts together

>>30503252
I remember seeing this a long time ago. It's kinda cool to see it come back.

Now all we have to do is get cyoa_aie to start writing again and I'll be happy.

>>30503252
I remember you. You're that anthrofag.

>>30503653
Oh no

>>30503252
I read this back in the day. Has it really been 5 years?

>>30502773
My only completed story

>>30504456
I did that once I think

>>30504456
5 long wonderful years.
Wouldn't change a thing.

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>>30505050
Digits speak truth.

How do you get to Equestrian?

https://pastebin.com/KtdT9QvS

>>30505439
Magic bleach, duh

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>spend 20 freedom franks on pastebin pro
>plan to organize pastes in folders as they're all over the place
>"these folders are only visible to you"
I mean, I'm not surprised, but still.

>>30505810
Should have caught the sale.

Hey guys I had an idea for a short green that may surprise you. If you guys are cool with it, I'd love to get started.

>>30505965
Get started.
You have my blessing.
It'll wash out.

>>30505965
Content is always welcome, fire away!

>>30505965
>>30505965
(same Anon, just namefagging for you boys)
> Before entering the world of Equestria, it took a lot to arrive.
> You had no idea of arriving in this world at all.
> After getting weird on /x/ for a few days, you discovered a way to travel to a "Heavenly Dimension where the world is yours.".
> No way you're passing that up, your life sucks ass.
> You put a whole day in preparation for the inter-dimensional travel but you must've misread something.
> Your mind was telling you "Black Magik" but why would a heavenly realm need Black Magik?
> Then again, you don't know shit about magic and all of that spiritual nonsense.
> After setting up a perfect pentagram along with summoning material you found after googling "How to summon strong demons".
> The conjuring begins when you light the candles, turning off the lights and getting ready to live a never-ending life of eating tater-tots and pussy, sipping Mountain Dew and tits.
> After three hours, nothing happens.
> Then it hits you, demons need a gateway with evil or some stupid shit like that.
> To get the maximum in the demon hierarchy, you wait until the next day to commit more sins than you have in your entire life.

>>30505050
I would.
Lots and lots of things.

What are the best Anon x Twilight fics? Also, any lewds about that?

>>30506149
> Sinner by birth but gifted in their ways from the desire of never-ending pleasure.
> You have to give yourself a pep-talk before starting a one-way ticket to the next step.
"Alright Anon, you have to do this to ensure that you'll get some top-notch demons tonight."
> To sum it all up, today will be one to remember.
> You head down to the Retirement Shelter to see your grandfather.
> He stand up happy to see you but is sent to the ground when you swing your foot up between his legs, slamming into his old groin.
> You depart without telling the staff of his condition.
> A trip down the highway to Hell is never complete without a trip to Walmart.
> "If you can read this, then the bitch fell off." is a popular slogan but is now a tattoo on your dick that can be read by all as you stroll through the toy isle.
> The Walmart security officers try to detain you but not before you shove your member into the fish-tanks.
> After having a life-long ban from Walmart but escaping while pretending to have a heart attack.
> A walk through the park is a good way to get exercise but the best time in the park is when the handicapped are gathered at a basketball court while you throw rocks at them.
> Nothing in the world is as fucked as sharing a double-sided dildo with your sister.
> People can giggle and make as many jokes as they like but you're the one that gets to be immortal.
> Getting kicked out of TGI Friday's has never been as fun when you're caught taking pictures of people in the stalls trying to take a shit.
> You can stay at grandma's house and she'll make you some of that country ham you loved as a kid but after dinner you can diddle on her bead.
> While you're at it, you take your neighbor's cat for a swim in the local river in a pierced trash-bag.
> His piece of Anon's wrath isn't done just yet. You put it to an end after shitting on his windowsill and pissing in his air-conditioner.

>>30506495
> After a whole day of being as dastardly as you can, you wonder how much you can degrade yourself further after buying every adult magazine at your local Circle K.
> The time for preparation has begun, it's time to see the glory of /x/'s prophecies.
> You get your demonic setup ready after having to visit a Home Depot for more demon summoning supplies.
> Returning with everything you need, you wonder if you need anything else to draw in more demons.
"I could burn down an orphanage or jerk off Phil's dog, nah that's just too fucked up."
> You enter your home and make sure your covert summoning is ready, placing a lit match into each of the candles.
> The dark room suddenly has a purple-ish tint when the pentagram glows dark red.
"Holy fuck..."
> A shadowy figure forms from the center of the Devil's signature.
> It's glowing red eyes stare into your own with an intimidating feeling going through your mind.
> It's low-bass voice creeps from the figure as you stare in awe.
> "You... Are the human known as Anonymous."
"Y-Yeah, that's me."
> "What the actual fuck is wrong with you?"
> His tone shifts with a hint of disgust in his voice.
"What are you talking about?"
> "Oh, you know exactly what I'm talking about. How's that tattoo feel?"
"Honestly, not good."
> "Yeah that's what you fucking deserve, you degenerate."
> He crosses his arms close to his frame and reminds himself of what he must do thanks to the ritual.
> "Alright, just make your wish and I'll leave."
"I want to go to that place 4chan won't shut up about!"
> The dark demon stares for a moment then smirks at you with evil ideas in mind.
> "Sure thing, Anon."
> The world around you seems to literally drip down and fall into darkness.
> Suddenly, a bright array of colors fill your surroundings. Shaping into a crystal-like wall.
> A carpet appears under your feet and a whole scenery is formed around you with a certain familiar tone to it.

>>30506652
> You turn around to the sight of a septuplet of ponies that vary in different colors, looks, and hairstyles.
> Perhaps manestyles would be the better word for it.
> That fucking demon put you in the wrong world.
> Their faces stare at you with more confusion than you have.
> All of the ponies have a certain visible trait about them.
> Two have horns, two have wings, two have no wings or horns while one has both wings and a horn.
> Time to nut up.
> You walk towards them, remaining totally silent until you get about five feet apart from them.
"Alright, I have went through a lot of shit to get here... Which one of you is gonna suck my dick?"

End

>>30506149
HAHA, DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS

>>30468915
bump

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>>30506495
>Shoving your member in the fish-tanks.
>Nothing in the world is as fucked as sharing a double-sided dildo with your sister.
>throwing rocks at the handicapped
I swear to God this is great anon, continue this.

>>30506719
Don't pretend to be RED, that's just gay.

>>30506771
I think that's the point.

>>30506716
Make a trip, more importantly though pastebin

Continuing https://pastebin.com/s1zLTgyP

>Stealthily you creep towards the pillar before stopping halfway.
>What the fuck are you doing, this isn't the kind of world were assassins lurk in the shadows.
>Actually come to think of it nothing really lurks in the shadows here. Not even changelings, they hide in plain sight.
>Chastising your paranoia you walk towards the pillar.
>"Let's see what's behind pillar number one!"
>"Uh-oh."
>You've stumbled across a rather sheepish looking Flurry Heart.
>A million questions run through your head. Why is she out here? Why is no one looking after her?
>Shouldn't a baby be in bed at this time of night? You don't know you're not a parent.
>You have heard she is a bit of trouble maker.
>Looking up and down the corridor you try to spot a frantic babysitter or a panicking guard.
>There's nothing, except a dull noise coming from the ballroom at the end of the hallway.
>Suddenly it hits you what's going on.
>What happened when you were a kid and your parents told you not to do something.
>Well sometimes you listened but fifty percent of the time you did it anyway.
>She's heard the noise and wants to play at the gala.
>A mad idea enters your head. Totally mad.
>Reaching out you scoop her up and place her in the folds of your robe.
>As you start walking back towards the gala, Flurry realizes what is happening and begins to giggle excitedly.
>Looking down you put a finger to your lips "Shhhhhhh."
>She attempts to mimic the gesture, jamming her hoof in her mouth "Pllbbbbbbpft". Well she gets points for trying.
>Oh man you're gonna get in so much trouble for this.

>>30507172
>-----------------------------

>Entering the ballroom Flurry begins giggling and making other baby pony sounds.
>You cover by coughing loudly, a few ponies begin to stare.
>Shoving your hand in the folds of your toga you try to silence her.
>Then noises stop, and your hand has been slobbered on.
>Discreetly you wipe it on a nearby wall hanging and move on with your life.
>"Hla!"
>A tiny hoof pokes into your side, Flurry is pointing and making more cute noises.
>Pointing in the direction of the buffet.
>Fair enough, you're a tad hungry yourself. Though you'd hardly call this baby food.
>More like fancy finger foods. Fancy hoof foods?
>Once you reach the table, there's a gold glow within your robe and a cupcake floats within.
>You begin picking over the choices, trying to avoid the more grassy and flowery ones.
>While you find them edible, you don't have cow's robust digestive tract.
>"Ah, Sir Anonymous there you are!"
>Oh for fucks sake. That boring noble has found you again.
>You rack your mind for a way out of this.
>Too late you notice a silver platter of pastries rise into the air surrounded in a golden glow.
>Now you were never good at trigonometry but you know an intercept course when you see one.
>*WHAM*
>The pony goes down in a shower of puff pastry.
>And you powerwalk away as fast as possible.
>As you evade the incident the crowd of party goers get louder, their attention is fixed on something.
>Your stomach lurches as you spot the reason, a guard is talking to Cadence and Shining.
>And they both look shocked, you don't need to be Sherlock Holmes to figure out why.
>Flurry has been reported missing.

>>30507179
>They both dash out of the ballroom following the guard.
>Shit. They'll be heading to Flurry's room.
>You need to get her back there. Before they arrive.
>Looking down at Flurry her expression mirrors your own. That of a man and baby pony in deep shit.
>Ok, ponies run faster than you. How do you get ahead of them?
>Fuck.
>Another mad idea hits you. You dash over to the window.
>"Flurry, honey. I don't know how much you understand but you need to fly us up to your room now. Right now."
>She seems to get the idea as you frantically try to mime what you just said.
>A golden glow surrounds you as you begin to float upwards into the night air.
>Hopefully no one will notice as you do your best impression of a redneck being abducted by aliens.
>Or that you're not wearing underwear.
>As you touch down in the royal bedroom Flurry rockets out of your robe and into her crib.
>You can hear hooves galloping outside the doors.
>Snagging a magazine from the nightstand you fling yourself into a chair next to the crib.
>The doors slam open. The ponies screech to a halt as they spot you.
>Shining Armor is the first to recover. "Anonymous?!"
>"Sshhhhh, you'll wake the baby."
>You are so full of shit. It's unbelievable.
>"What are you doing here?!"
>"I was taking a stroll through the castle and heard Flurry crying, so I stopped in to read her a bedtime story."
>You hold up the magazine as evidence to support your blatant lies.
>Cadence looks at you sceptically. "From Playmare?"
>Well, will you look at that. A horse dick. You are indeed holding a copy of Playmare.
>It seems you're at a crossroads. Tell the truth.
>Or have your friends think that you're homosexual and weird.
>Hmmm....
>Well they already think you're weird.
>"They have some good articles."

The end. Next time Anon's adventures in Changelingland.

>>30503252
Damn! I loved that story!
Welcome!
Now, we just need more of the Bros in Equestrian humor (here comes the sun!) And maybe Sherman would return as well?
And then we'll do the time warp

>/fit/ anon is dead
Why live.

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>>30506716
>tfw this Anon won't be in anything else.
Make some more stuff RED, you may be demented but you're pretty funny.

>>30507772
Buddy had to get a job and join the workforce, but he's doing well.

more fallanon when?

>>30506336
None of the one's I know are finished.

>>30507515
Derps is way too excited for flute rock

>>30508328
If it's good enough for Jetstream Sam, it's good enough for the iron flank.

>>30468915
bib

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Alright so we have fallanon, when are we getting another multi part story? Step up lurkers, now's a better time than never

So, AiE, what story should you be working on and what are you procrastinating with?

>>30509059
I was intending to start a green to help keep this shitshow alive, but then I was dragged off to the land of frantic bi-hourly masturbation.

>>30509059
Gonna take a stab at Sad-Anon in Equestria tomorrow since I've been using a job interview as a (valid) excuse to put it off. Now it's done, so back to writing shitty greentext fanfiction.

If anyone has any light-hearted prompts, post 'em.

>>30506716
You're a sick son of a bitch
>Lucky for you, I'm into that

>>30508133
Just got home from work, can't promise a long update but gonna put something up tonight.

>>30509059
I've got 5 stories I'm working on at the moment, AND I just started a new one yesterday during my breaks at work. But now that I'm home, I'm going to play some vidya, jerk it till I'm red before passing out.

>>30507189
Good articles/cool baby
It was ravioli ravioli

>>30509715
>5 stories in progress
>Decides to start another one
Anon I need to know your thought process behind that.

>>30510055
There wasn't one.

>>30482032

>You turn to face the approaching threat calling out to your squad once more.
"Protect Moondust at all cost, if those Warriors break through we are lost!"
>You take up your position on the right flank again lending your blade work to the desperate defense,and trusting Moondust to do her part.
>The Warriors have closed to within a dozen paces and begin their charge.
>After two strides a magical aura shimmers into existence around the pair of creatures and they begin to move as if wading through chest deep oil.
>With no idea how long Moondust can maintain her time altering sorcery you order the advance.
"Forward, bring them down!"
>Your squad surges toward the enemy, adopting a wedge formation as they drive the hormagaunts before them.
>Sheer weight of bodies is slowing the advance but Stone Sentinel is at the center of your line.
>She has put her weight behind the shield and is plowing the tyranid invaders from her path with the same kind of dauntless efficiency you might expect of one of the Death Guard.
>They Warriors, still trapped in the grip of Moondust's enchantment, are able to do little besides watch with hate filled eyes as you set upon them.
>Your blade sings through the air parting spines and limbs as spears punch out from the protective shield wall finding gaps in the chitinous armor of your foes.
>Unable to defend themselves the warriors fall quickly under the concentrated assault. Moondust heaves a sigh of relief finally able to relax her concentration.
>Using magic to their advantage the other squads have managed to bring down warriors assaulting their positions, but not without losses.
>Before you can issue further orders an ear piercing shriek cuts the air.
>Nearby a building erupts in a shower of splinters and broken glass as a blob of bio-plasma detonates inside it.
>Two members of your squad blink out of existence as shrapnel flies towards them, the debris slowing to a stop near them without actually striking.

>>30510157
>Illusory flames crawl across the rubble and a cloud of magically conjured smoke begins drifting over the battlefield.
>Through the haze you can make out the gargantuan form of the Carnifex, nine tones of armor and muscle capable of tearing through a battle tank.
>The hive spawned monstrosity throws its mouth open and roars again a glow building in its mouth as the sound reaches a crescendo.
"Scatter!"
>You shout setting the ponies to flight as you rush into the questionable protection of a barricade.
>Moondust, apparently panicking has frozen in place looking desperately for something to hide behind.
>Cursing yourself inwardly you crouch low and break from cover sprinting towards Moondust at full tilt.
>She turns towards you just as the Carnifex fires its shot of bioplasma.
>A glow engulfs Moondust's horn and time seems to dialite.
>You bend low and scoop Moondust up in you shield arm still running.
>You steal a glance towards the Carnifex, the bioplasma shot which should be speeding towards you on a lethal trajectory instead glides lazily through the air.
>Three more strides carry you clear of the orbs path and towards the first floor window of one of the remaining buildings.
>Spinning mid step you tuck Moondust in close against your chest, shielding her with your body as you crash bodily through the glass and into the building.
>A split second of nausea washes over you as time reverts to normal, the shards of glass from the window crashing around you as a detonation sounds from outside.
>Moondust who seems to be regaining her composure looks up from her position cradled in your arm. "Sorry.."
>You cut her off before she has further chance to elaborate.
"No harm was done, but we must rejoin the battle quickly."
>You step back through the shattered window before placing her on her hooves.
>The arrival of the Cranifex on the scene has thrown your battle lines into complete disarray.

>>30510160
>If you can bring it down quickly the loss might drive the tyranids into a frenzy long enough for you to regroup.
>Using your Vox amplifier to full effect once more you shout out over the field.
"Concentrate all magic on the Carnifex!"
>Turning to regard Moondust you ask
"Slow that thing for as long as you can."
>She nods her understanding and rushes off to rejoin the squad, as you size up the Cranifex.
>You know it's almost certainly suicide, but if that thing doesn't fall you're all dead anyway.
>Besides why should the guards in training be the only ones to have a bit of fun.
>You charge, head low, pauldron and shield up for what little protection they might might afford against so monstrous a foe.
>The Carnifex guided by whatever malignant intellect it posses seems to recognize you as a threat and stomps forward to meet your charge.
>You're forced to swirl and spin to avoid the deadly reach of its raking talons.
>Your sword flashes out removing the tip from a talon as you dodge and weave trying to get inside its reach.
>A beam of light flashes out from somewhere nearby scoring a line across the beasts armored side.
>The Carnifex roars it's indignation at the assault and tries to turn to face the new threat.
>You lunge gouging a line through chitinous armor of its chest.
"Your battle is with me monster!"
>The combination of noise and pain seem to set you firmly within the tyranid's sights once more as it slams its blade like limbs down seeking to impale you.
>You dodge backwards letting it come up short, its claws embedding themselves firmly within the dirt instead.
>More magical attacks rake the the Carnifex's flank as you continue to parry and dodge fending off a storm of rending claws.
>As it brings a talon around for your head its movements slow to a crawl, it would seem Moondust is adding her efforts to the battle now.

>>30510166
>Seizing what may be your only opportunity to attack you leap forward and slash at the creatures head, your sword biting deep into alien flesh and bone.
>You put your weight behind the blade letting momentum drag it free as you land and quickly renew your assault.
>You slash wildly at the creatures chest and throat intending to inflict as much damage as possible while it is held.
>Your assault ends abruptly as a clawed foot comes up and slams you in the chest sending you rolling in a sprawling heap.
>You come to a stop against a building some thirty feet back, nothing injured but your pride thankfully.
>The Carnifex moves to pursue you but staggers and collapses to its knees, supporting itself with its claws as the guards continue to rain magical attacks down on it.
>The simulacrum doesn't survive long under such concentrated assault, popping out of existence much like all the others.
>With no leader to guide them the Tyranids revert to a more feral and mindless state attacking one another as often as the defending guards.
"Slay them quickly before they regain their senses!"
>You quickly put your own orders in to practice laying tyranids low with each sweep of your blade.
>What was a battle quickly becomes a slaughter and the last of the hormagaunts fall beneath the spears of the guards.
>A deathly silence reigns over the battle field, the guards wary of any other attack.
>When none is forth coming one of the guards speaks up. "I think we won."
>This hesitant, almost confused statement is echoed throughout the lines and soon gives way to jubilant shouts.
>All sense of order is soon lost as the squads begin intermingling, celebrating their first victory.
>You are less ready to celebrate, the losses were heavy, only a third of the combatants who began remaining on the field.
>A change of tactics may be in order, but that is something for you to consider.
>For now let them have their moment, and their victory wine. Do the ponies even have victory wine?

>>30510172
Here's the updated pastebin https://pastebin.com/4DcZLrJe
A bit shorter than I'd normally like to put up, but I at least wanted to get something up for everyone that's been following along so patiently.
Depending on work hours I'll try to get more up before the weekend if I can.

>>30510193
5am us still up and reading

>>30510193
Fucking excellent as always fallanon. Still managing both a space marine character and military fiction without descending into pure cringe and masturbation, which is honestly pretty uncommon.

>>30468915
bib

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A shame Anon can't have his favorite dish anymore.

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>>30511075
>plow steak
>plow

>>30511075
Pork chop sandwiches?

>>30511426
Ponut surprise?

>>30510157
>death guard
do you mean the death korps of krieg, or the heretical chapter of spess mahrines?

>>30510193
another awesome chapter. captures the battle well without being bogged down in grimdark descriptions of the dark and grim battlefield.

>>30511426
GET THE FUCK OUT

>>30511875
The heretics. Anon would known of them by reputation as stoic warriors that rarely faltered on an advance since he's from the heresy timeline and they weren't full on servants of the gods when last he has heard of them.

>>30507189
Nice

>>30510863
He's not doing a Blood Ravens, Ultramarines, Spic Wolves, or Chaos chapter, so it avoids many of the pitfalls automatically.

>>30512719
They have wolves in Mexico?

>>30512049
GI JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEEEEEEE

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"Come over here and make me fuck off, Limey!"
>You accentuate your taunt by rubbing your balls on Holder's Boulder.
>You know this sexual tension is bound to break soon, and the two of you will end up fucking like crazed weasels.
>At least, that's what your copious consumption of prime time sit-coms before your arrival here leads you to believe.
>There is an annoyed snort.
>Followed by an angry snarl.
>And the sound of hooves galloping towards you at full speed.
"I knew it! Today's the day!"

So what happens next, fuckers?

>>30511426
Begone, infidel goyim.

>>30513499
Pants off and presenting a puckered yet ready phat booty.

>>30506495
>diddle on her bead.
Jesus Christ

>>30513499
She kicks you square in the balls and stomps on your face, rudely awakening you to the fact that real life does not play out like sitcoms.

You spend the rest of the day having ice applied to your face by her mother.

>>30513499
Your cyoa thread die?

>>30468915
bub

>>30510193
Very good update Fallanon. It flowed quite well without getting mired down in a "play-by-play".

>>30507189
A good kek was had. Thanks He-Anon.

>>30512735
They're called coyotes but yeah.

>>30514650
>Coyote trash same as wolves
pls don't be retarded

"Go away. No one likes you."
>And that's when GlimGlam learned that if you try to make friends with a human
"And your hair is dumb."
>You're gonna get burned

>>30515562
>ponies can't even handle low quality bantz
>if you diss out anything more you get sent to pony prison
>>30286282

>>30514977
>Missing the joke.
Please don't be retarded.

>>30516094
"Hey, get your dirty hooves off me!"
>And that's when Anonymous learned that if you pizza when you should french fry
"You're all cucks!"
>You're gonna have a bad time

>>30468915
>you will never be held down and fucked roughly by an emo mare who enjoys shooting up the local grocery store
>last week she sent one of the bag boys home with critical booboos after getting him in the eye and flank with foam darts

>>30516147
>Thinking your human smuggler reference was a joke.
Stop being retarded.

>>30468915
Uh, I guess I'm alive again? It's only been 4 months.

Twilight, unsatisfied with O&O, decides to create a new, better RPG system. She’s worked very hard on it, studied countless texts and tomes, crunched innumerable numbers, simulated thousands of battles. She manages to guilt trip a reluctant mane six into play‐testing it with her. It’s F.A.T.A.L.

>>30517640
Rarity's stats were a topic of much debate.

>>30517640
Roll for anal circumference.

>>30517294
>It's only been 4 months.
I didn't have a job that days. But now I have.

I has became a normie.

>>30518391
y helo thar elegan/tg/entleman

Happy Friday horsefuckers...

"Anon," Twilight asks with a tilt of her head, "Why do you wear clothes?”
>It’s an unexpected question, and for a moment you’re not quite sure how to handle it. You just stare at her over the breakfast table, trying to put together why she might ask something like this, then decide it’s probably just curiosity, nothing sinister for a change. You give a shrug and go back to reading the morning paper.
“Same reason anyone else wears clothes I guess,” you say with a shrug. “Rarity wears clothes, lots of ponies wear clothes.”
“Well, yes,” Twilight says haltingly. “But that’s for fashion and your clothes aren’t exactly…”
>You lower your paper a little.
“Aren’t exactly what?”
“That is to say…”
“Yes?”
>She pauses and rubs her chin thoughtfully.
“Well, I guess Rarity would call them hobo chic.”
“Is that a good thing?”
“I don’t see how it possibly could be.”
>You look down at the ratty jeans and shirt you’re wearing appraisingly. Hey, those rips in the knees are something that designers actually go for back on earth! It’s that worn in look, it’s absolutely fashionable! And that hole in your shirt? Barely noticeable, it’s like a beauty mark, only for clothes rather than your face, and it doesn’t make you look like a french whore.
“Well, I think they’re fine,” you say, a little bruskly.
“Okay, your horrible fashion sense aside,” Twilight says with a wave of her hoof, “I still don’t get why you wear them. It’s warm, so it can’t be for the weather. They don’t hold any sentimental value, and it's been really hot recently to be honest… so, why would you choose to wear those things?”
“Because I just like them.”
“Do you not even know why you wear them?”
>Your cheeks flush. Okay, now this line of questioning feels a little more menacing.
“Th-that’s not it,” you stutter.
“Okay, then give me one good reason.”
“Nah, that’s okay.”

(1/?)

>>30518862

“Anon, you’ve got nothing.”
“But-”
“Just one good reason and I’ll-”
“Because I don’t want to be naked!” you suddenly blurt out.
>Silence falls across the breakfast table. Your fingernails tear into the newspaper with how tightly you’re clutching it. Twilight stares into your face, which you can still feel is hot and flushed. She blinks a few times as you look back, unable to turn your head away from her horrified expression. You’re not sure why this moment feels so awkward, but it also feels like you’re stuck in it for an eternity.
“W-what?” Twilight finally says.
“You heard me. You may not be the princess of hearing things, I know, but you’re not deaf.”
“I did but…” she says, then sputters a moment as if she cant think of what to say. “But what do you mean you don’t want to be naked?”
>You roll your eyes.
“I mean exactly that. Without clothes you’re naked, and I don’t want to walk around everywhere naked all the time, so thus I wear clothes.”
“But, that’s not… that’s… is that really how humans see nudity? That, if you’re not wearing clothes you’re naked?!”
“Well of course, how do you see…”
>You trail off as you notice a low blush spreading over Twilight’s face. The rest of her seems to be going pale, but a deep rosy glow begins to creep across her cheeks, nose, and forehead. She also seems to be trembling a little, and her mouth is a little agape, like she’s forgotten to close it.
“Uh… Twilight?”
“S-so… y-you mean… th-that means that the whole time… y-you’ve been living with me, I’ve… I’ve been…”
>Her hooves begin to creep up her body towards her chest, and she looks down at herself. By natural instinct, your eyes follow her gaze and you stare down at the tuft off fluff below her throat, and at her trembling hooves. As you glance back up, she locks eyes with you, and there is a moment of perfect, piercing silence.

(2/4)

>>30514289
I don't visit those tumors, I was just bored.

>>30518869

>Then, she begins to scream.
“AAAAAH! DON’T LOOK AT ME! YOU FUCKING PERVERT HOW DARE YOU!”
“Wait, what? Twilight what-”
>You’d say more, but a hoof quickly crosses your cheek, silencing you with a slap that feels more like a punch. Damn those clunky horse hooves.
“GET AWAY FROM ME YOU PEEPING TOM! HELP, HELP! ANON IS TRYING TO LOOK AT ME WHILE I’M NAKED!” Twilight continues to wail.
“What the actual fuck are you-”
>Another slap as Twilight climbs quickly to her feet and rushes at you, hooves flailing.
“GET OUT! GET OUT YOU PERVERT!!!”
“Fucking stop, you psycho!”
“YOU JERK, YOU DEVIANT! OUT! OUTTT!!!!”
>Before you can do much to stop her, she’s pushed you to the door of the castle. She pauses just long enough to give you a wide-eyed, desperate, and decidedly violent look.
“GIVE ME YOUR CLOTHES!”
“What?! Why?!”
“Because I’m a lady and you should be a gentleman and help me cover myself, and because you saw quite a peep show all these years.”
“Hold on. That doesn’t make any se-”
“AAAAAAH ANON IS TRYING TO VIOLATE MY PERSONAL SPACE AND PEER INTO MY MOST PERSONAL OF CREVICES! HE’S TRYING TO GLIMPSE MY GORGEOUS GASH! AAAAAAH!”
>Yet again, before you can do anything, Twilight’s magic grips your clothes and rips them off of you. As you reach down to shield your own dangly bits from sight, the door behind you opens and you’re flung backwards out into the street, landing with a thud on your bare ass. Twilight glares at you sourly, then slams the door, leaving you outside in the buff.

(3/4)

>>30518874

>You’re still trying to get your head back on straight as you rise to your feet and glance around. You can tell your face is flushed, and you can feel how utterly naked you are. Surely, someone will come yell at you some more any minute now! There are ponies near you, but they barely seem to glance at you, just going about their business. It’s like nothing is weird about you being nude. Something inside you begins to relax a little. Maybe being naked around here won’t be so bad. Maybe Twilight was right, and you don’t need clothing anymore in this strange new land. In fact, you’re beginning to feel like you might be more comfortable this way. It's nice, and breezy, and unless you try to cook bacon, it's terribly convenient. Yes, you decide with a nod, nothing could make this weird.
“Oh hey Anon,” Spike says as he passes. “Nice penis.”
>You stare after him with a grimace as he goes whistling on his merry way. Okay. Now it’s weird. Why does Spike always ruin everything?

-END-

https://pastebin.com/XLTaa2PP

Hope you all have a good weekend or something. Have a drink in my honor. Or just drink. You know, one of those options.

>>30518874
That's equal to seven different counts of rape in multiple different provinces.

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>>30518881

>>30518881
Dat Spike
Kek/10

>>30518881
Lewd/nude

So, genetically modified pony abominations or robot ponies we can have sex with?

>>30522266
Why not both?

Y'all got any more of that green?

>>30522284
At the same time, or one leading to the other?

>>30523022
Maybe. Whatchu got for me?

>>30468915
bump

>>30523598
Cool story bro

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>>30503252
jesus its been forever, its the story that was like a nod to SCP-containment right? All I remember is them 'escaping' to some kinda endless grass field or something? I would love to see more if you intend on coming back.

>>30525236
10/10

>>30524739
Wow, that has been a while.
Hope it starts up again.

>>30525236
Always gets a laugh

>>30518881
kek. Good to see you AnonPencil.

what's this business about page 10 y'all?