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Princess Applejack

This is a blue board which means that it's for everybody (Safe For Work content only). If you see any adult content, please report it.

Thread replies: 509
Thread images: 16

Howdy, partner!

What you see here began as a series of comedy-centric stories with the concept of an alicorn-ascended Princess Applejack trying to change a mismanaged Equestria for the better by humorously interacting with the other, quite lazy, princesses. Plus late night pink antics.

Not to mention a whole bunch of Changelings with nothing better to do but cause mischief.


The whole thing was set in motion by this gem:

~~~~~

>So, wait, why am Ah' a princess again?

>Because you seem to be the only goddamn one of those ponies who gets that a Princess need to do actual work regarding maintenance of the kingdom. You know how much city planning or trade negotiations Twilight or Luna have done? Fucking nothing. Everyone is obsessed with the world ending threats they think I should fight, but the minute I point out the free health care I have to work to maintain everyone goes quiet. And don't even get me started on Cadence, who can't even manage a basic meeting with the Equestrian Games representative. Fucking annoying. Go do actual princess stuff, because apparently everyone else got the pamphlets mixed up or something and thinks "Princess" means "Beat cop."

~~~~~

Are you feeling creative? Try your hand at writing a story! No contribution is too small and we love having new folks around.

If you're more artistically inclined give a drawing or sketch a shot. Don't fret too much; it doesn't have to be fancy and we appreciate artwork a lot.

If that isn't your style either, writers always need feedback. So tell us what you liked - and what you didn't - to help us improve.

If you are unsure about anything, do not be afraid to ask. We will gladly bring you up-to-date or explain anything you feel is unclear.

Thread 203! And it's time to get the answers we've all wanted to see!
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Here is full archive of the stories in condensed, easy-to-read form with all chatter in-between removed.
Check out the pastebin here:
http://pastebin.com/u/PrincessApplejack

Curious what happened last time?
Check out the previous thread here:>>30351950

You are completely new and have no idea what is going on? There is a wikia with an overview of all characters, a complete timeline, previous thread recaps and explanation of the various concepts used in these stories!
Check out the wiki here:http://princess-aj.wikia.com/wiki/Princess_Applejack_Wiki

Confused about when a character first showed up or who they are? Want to know when an arc started? Check out character notes and details here :
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1PsMAwLcIdC3IYxezAV9Ko4neEguNvc3eQqQqiTCxdDs/edit#gid=2119378650
Check out the 'Princess Applejack: Re-Cut Edition' here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/15cv3kqExr_vOM0JkUh4dqnvVKxJ5Z-P1KHwE8Z7aG0k/edit?usp=sharing

Are you interested in the dark side of these threads?
Check out our collection of NSFW stories here:
http://pastebin.com/u/NSFT_NotSafeForTwo_

And above all else, enjoy your stay at /paj/!
>>
First for Pinkie Pie.

Just for you buddy.
>>
First for AUJ is right!
>>
>>30405690
Admit it, the minute that got uploaded to DB you were just counting down the minutes.
>>
>>30405743
About what!?
>>
>>30405751
...maybe.
>>
OOCO
>AJ
"Celestia"
~~~~

>Tia? Ah' gotta question.

"Nooooo, and here I thought we were going to talk about buttercups and gumdrops and tiny little dancing ponies on toadstools!"

>Ew, why would ya' dance on that?

"I'm choosing to take this smile and ignore the rest."

>Anyway, mah' question is, alicorns have the power of all three ponies, right?

"Yep. That is factually correct and not something I just made up because I didn't want to imply anything."

>So then where do crystal ponies fit in?

"I beg your pardon?"

>In the whole grand scheme of things Ah' mean, do we get their magic too?

"Do they have magic?"

>You're askin' me?

"You're asking me? I never even visited there before I nuked the evil asshole on top!"

>Huh. Ah' don't know if they have their own special magic or not.

"They turned you sparkly with magic."

>So are they just born with that? Can they turn us crystal?

"Can they shatter us!?"

>This is some disturbing questioning here.

"I might need to invest in tuning forks."

>Celestia!

"As a precaution!"

>Can we invest in crystal boring drills too? We can at least spin that one.

"See this shit? This is why I made you a princess."
>>
>>30405765
About Making Shining Armor commit suicide.

Come on it solves so many thread problems.
>>
>>30405803
There's like a fifty percent chance she just stole him from Cadence.
>>
>>30405795
And that's how the war began!
>>
>>30405803
He probably just slipped on a bar of soap.
>>
>>30405839
No discord, so they have a decent shot of winning.
>>
>>30405864
Or went shaving.
>>
>>30405690
>Applejack doesn't think that she used EP magic to make the apple
>She doesn't realize this means Earf pones really are worthless.
>>
>>30405928
The only magic she needs for that is love!... the actual kind, not the tangible magic kind. It's different and it's just acquaintances that it has the same effect. Seriously.
>>
>>30405973
>A coincidence

Motherfucking...
>>
File: Madam Pink.jpg (98KB, 894x894px) Image search: [Google]
Madam Pink.jpg
98KB, 894x894px
Pinkie Previews!

>Twilight learns no food makes you better at sneaking.
>Pinkie is not as pink as you think!
>Fluttershy tries to teach a pony to fly!
>Cadence wonders what pony tastes like and can't believe the answer.
>Celestia has her cake, but she'll eat him too.
>Cheerilee wants none of these kids me mes.
>Applebloom leans you can't split a pair.
>Lots of growing fanservice!
>>
>>30406089
Why do so many of these have a weird gory bend to them...
>>
>>30405864
>>30405878
>Shiny never returned from Shiny Time.

Oooooh boy.
>>
>>30405736
D'aww thanks.
>>
>>30406209
>It took everyone a week to figure it out
>>
>>30406694
>they promote the Shining Armor doll as Captain of the Royal Guard
>troop morale and efficiency dramatically improves
>>
File: is this truly human anymore.jpg (184KB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [Google]
is this truly human anymore.jpg
184KB, 1920x1080px
So. Has anyone given a definitive answer on the status of Flash's lightning rod following Sunset patching him up? If Twiggles kept it as a souvenir, I imagine Sunset would have tried to make him a new one.
>>
>>30407517
>I like my horsecock and balls like I like my Cucumber and Eggs... Pickled and floating in jars.

"Twi nooo...."

>Yeeeeeesh~
>>
File: Nother Ponk.png (185KB, 1600x1200px) Image search: [Google]
Nother Ponk.png
185KB, 1600x1200px
I've drawn another Ponk!
>>
>>30407988
And she is a cutie!
>>
>>30407988
Dat tongue poke
>>
>>30407988
Damn, that's some amazing improvement over the last one. The shading especially is improving!
>>
>>30407988
INTO THE WIKI IT GOES!
>>
>>30407988
Cute!
>>
>>30407988
Never a fan of bipedal stances but damn do I love the expression!
>>
>>30407988
I like that you were getting more motive with your stances instead of just profile pics. Not that they weren't great, but the added character really helps show your evolution. It's the difference between Chitty looking and the one where she is rocking it on the piano.

Still my favorite by the way.
>>
>>30407988
>The little chest floof

Perfect.
>>
>>30407988
Speaking of the Ponk! Was anyone planning to pick up Spike? I can handle DT tomorrow.
>>
>>30408686
If nobody speaks up by tomorrow, we'll just let that one guy wake him up so Joe can begin the Spiekning.
>>
>Fluttershy
“77”
~???~
~~~

>…hrm.

“Do you see where you went wrong?”

>…Hrmmmm…

“I’ll wait”

>…Hrm.

“Any minute now.”

>…Hm.

“Any minute.”

>…hmmm-

“HIS WING IS BROKEN!”

>Ohhhh, is that why he couldn’t fly? I thought I was being helpful. I’m sorry I just really want to help right about now.

“I just… it’s fine.”

>Is it?

“It’s fine. It’s totally fine.

?Alright, I’ll trust you.

“…It’s actually not fine catch him-“

CRACK!

~MY WIIIINNNNNGGGGGG… is somehow fixed, what the fuck?~

“…”

>Chaos, baby.

“You’re getting good at that.”
>>
>>30409293
>I’m hoping that maybe someday, I’ll be able to bring back the dead.

“…”

>Let me dream.
>>
>>30409369
Fucking DARK
>>
>Pommel
“Potsticker”
~~~

>I’m blaming your guys.

“My guys are saints, your guys are assholes, this isn’t complicated.”

>You literally have bat wings.

“That signifies nothing, racist.”

>Are you actually a race, or is that just armor?”

“That is our best kept secret, and you’ll never know.”

>Because I don’t even see you do anything most days.

“We watch our princess from the shadows, ensuring that no assassin stabs her as she does her nightly duty of guarding the realm of dreams.”

>Huh, really?

“Yeah, and it’s super easy, nobody ever tries to stab her or anything. Mostly? We fend off unwanted plotsnuggles.”

>The bane of our existence.

“Truly.”

>…

“…So should we wake them up?”

>Get the marker, make some dicks.

“I like how you think.”
>>
>>30409444
But honest. Question is, can she?
>>
CD
>Spitfire
“18”
~~~~

>How’s she doing?

DISTANT ROARING GARGLE!

>….

“Great! She just found the ice cream, I think. Or the yogurt. Or a slice of pie. Or a pony’s throat.”

>…Bit of a hassle.

“Yeah, I don’t know how Shiny can keep up with her, but I guess that’s why he’s true love incarnate!”

>Sounds about right.

“Yep! He’s pretty much the only one in the whole world for… well, you know.”

>I hear about it often enough, I should.

“…hey, Spitfire?”

>Hm?

“Do you, you know…”

>…Think he’s got enough on his plate, don’t you?

“Really?”

>Look, after all we’ve been through, his kindness, sticking by me when I needed it the most, inviting me in, all that, kind of makes sense there’s a little something, and I’m mare enough to admit that, you know… maybe. But I’ve always been a career mare first, and I don’t plan to change that.

“I can respect that. But still…”

>Weird of you to bring that up.

“Is it?”

>…Fine, got me there.

“I’ll drop it if you want.”

>Thanks, I’d appreciate that. Line’s long enough for the wait, you know?

“Guess I can’t argue there! Lots of swimmers waiting besides the pool. But you know, if it ever goes down…”

>…Eh.

“I’m counting that as a win!”

>You are not.

“So am, can’t stop me.”

>Eighteen, why.

“What can I say? I live off love.”

>…That is so cheesy.

“More chocolate and happy.”

>Ahhhh, all I care about right now is flying, and being awesome.

“Pretty admirable goals.”

>…Thanks for being straight with me instead of playing matchmaker.

“I’ll leave that to Cadence.”

>Heh.

“…”

>…Eighteen? Heh? Laugh with me?

“…”

>Eighteen?

“I’ve got to go…”

>EIGHTEEN!? COME BACK HERE!
>>
>>30407988
Love it!
>>
>>30409701
Wait was she just now revealing this?

I thought it was obvious.
>>
>>30409893
Think he was just worrried more people would reee because you know... Shining.
>>
>Daw
“PJ”
~~~

>OUI! Bugger! Get the ponces cock outta your mouth for six seconds, I wanna talk to you.

“HA! Like I actually get to do that. Seriously, I’d be down for it, but he just never takes me up on it. Ever! Think it’s still some kind of latent priss a piss inside of him or something.”

>Lass just tie him down and have at it or something.

“That’s rape. We call that rape. You’re telling me to rape him.”

>I was a pirate.

“You know what? Fair enough.”

>I mean, I never raped nobody, but it was a pirate ship, you were going to see-

“And you’re officially off the sailboat and into the rough waters.”

>You do pay attention! Knew I liked you.

“I’m a delight. What did you want to talk about?”

>OH! Just wanted to know if you wanted to write on the card for the wee lass.

“…A card.”

>Yeah.

“For… Diamond Tiara?”

>Yep.

“You’re giving her a card.”

>Yeah, it’s really neat, says “Sorry you got hurt fighting the forces of evil.” And when you open it up it gives a little inspirational music cue.

“Where… where did you get that? “

>Bought it for a bit.

“There is no way they have cards for this.”

>They got cards for everything! Here, check it out!

“…”Sorry you’re not getting laid.”

>Ehhh? Got it just in case.

“Please tell me they also have a card that says “Congrats on all the sex”.”

>They do!

“Oh…”

>…What?

“Where is it?”

>What? I’m not wasting bits like that.

“…you’re a cool pony.”
>>
>>30410122
Everyone already knows Spitfire is one of Shining's dick riders. He's wondering if she's just now coming out with this instead of having admitted this to 18 sometime in the past as OOCO. But since there's no OOCO, it's most likely the present.
>>
>>30410203
>Everyone already knows Spitfire is one of Shining's dick riders.

She's not tho, she outright said she cares about her career, not just getting laid. Even 18 and 42 put him higher, she's just like "Okay yeah after ALL THAT there's some feelings, but come on, I'm captain and got shit to do."
>>
>>30410227
I kinda like that, the whole idea that sure, after the shitton they've been through and the casual way they sometimes playfully flirt, she can admit he's attractive and has an attractive personality.

Then she don't give a fuck because hot ponies are number 2 on the list of fucks she gives.
>>
>Sigfried
"Delight"
~Guards~
~~~~~

>Damn it, it's not a mare!

It was probably the best reaction the guard could have expected from the griffon prince.

~Sire-~

>I know, I know, but seriously, that would have been amazing. Still haven't managed to cross a guard mare off my list. Seriously! How rare are those things!? We have a bunch of female guards around here. You see that? Up there? Totally a female. I would know, I've checked up close-

~SIRE!~

~That's Griswald's wife!~

>Wrong one. That is the wrong one and I am sticking to it.

The guard between the two griffons did not share their groan, even if he was feeling that familiar twitch return to his eye.

>Bah, I'm getting off track. You! Pony! What's up, everything alright around here?

"Sure, it's been pretty fun."

>It has? Well, clearly they've been hiding the good shit from me this whole time. You two? Treasonous, that's what you are.

Delight was pretty sure the griffon wasn't serious. Not enough to risk a glance at the hefty twin swords at his side, but in the ballpark of sure.

~Sire-~

>Do you mind? Talking to my guest here. Or rather, my mother's guest. So, tell me, how big are you?

~SIRE!~

>Asking a question here!

Or maybe every one of these royals was straight up insane, either or.

"Do you want to find out?"

The griffon certainly was something at any rate after a smirk crossed his face.

~Seriously!?~

~Can you stop hitting on our royalty for two seconds!?~

On the other hoof, despite the very loud and very vocal protests from the guard, nothing of the sort had come from Siegfried himself. He'd just raise a claw, open his beak, lower his claw, look side to side as if looking for a news crew or something of the sort hidden in the bushes, close his mouth, raised the other claw as if that would help, and finally just slapped his talon to his face.

He was done.

1/3
>>
>>30410532

>...Okay, you got me on that one, I've got nothing. I... wow, I need to work on my A material. See this? This is why I ask if they're male or female. Everyone always says "Well you just want to sleep with them", and then this happens! You, little pony, you get a talon up. I know that doesn't mean anything to you, but enjoy it. This talon? Going up.

Shortly afterwards, it was both guard's turns to be stunned silent.

>Did you seriously hit on my sister?

"Not really, but I think she took it like that."

>I almost had full respect for you there. You were this close to getting a lordship, I want you to know. This. Close.

~You can't give out lordships, sire!~

>Don't you tell me what I can do. I can do anything I set my mind to, that's what every story and exactly zero of my parents told me my entire life!

The prince's recovery from his misstep had been too fast, if the groan of pain from the guard was any indication.

>But, in case you get an idea, you have no chance-

"Trust me, she uh... she was very specific and detailed why it's not happening."

>Oof, how bad?

The smirk faltered, and that seemingly said it all.

>She's not racist! Totally not racist, she just has preferences. Very specific preferences.

"She mentioned loving talons getting into all the right places, yeah."

>...and wow, I'm officially done thinking about sex for the day. Congratulations, pony! You've killed my sex drive!

"My name's-"

>Your name is the Celibator, that's what your name is

"...that actually sounds pretty-"

>I noticed it the minute I said it. Damn, I should have saved that one.

"Live and learn?"

>If you ever see a chick with that tattoo, jump on it, easy points right there.

~SIRE!~

>I apologize for nothing.

With a grand, happy cackle, the griffon threw his arm over the pony's shoulders, only someone noticing that he was stiff as a board.

Not in that way.

2/3
>>
>>30410540

>Come on, pony! If you think you've had fun before, you don't know what joy is until you've tasted the sweet dealings of the Murder's Nest!

"The... what?"

>Murder is a gathering of crows.

"Oh. That-"

>And also what your family will accuse the bartender of after his Hawk's Eye makes you throw up your liver!

Escape was so very tempting.

>HA! Knew you'd be excited!

He tried too late. For the second time, he was flown away without verbal consent, and off towards the 'time of his life', the griffon swore.

~...I don't want to say it, but...~

Leaving behind two guards who shared a look, and sighed.

~That guy is the only one stupid enough to handle that asshole of a prince.~

~Dear hawk I hate him.~

~So, so much.~

~What are the chances they'll just kill each other?~

Low, both of them accepted.

They could still dream.
>>
>>30410550
Siegfried was gold in this.

Gold.
>>
>>30410550
I'm really liking these. Even Delight winning comes off funny when the right reaction is there.
>>
>>30410550
I'm surprised how well that turned out. The new guy won, Siggy never got a shot back, but it didn't feel forced or wanking, just a joke for Sig to bounce off of. The smirk was there but he never felt smug.

I liked it.
>>
>Blueblood
“Arana”
~~~

>GAHHHHHHHH!

“I swear this is just beans.”

>AHHHHhhohh thank goodness. Arana! Why did you explode beans all over my wall!?

“Well, for starters, I didn’t explode them.. the fire did.”

>WHY!?

“I wanted to cook beans, but apparently you’re supposed to uh… open the can first. I think this is a learning experience.”

>You don’t eat food! Why did you want to cook beans!?

“…”

>…Oh.

“Spike eats beans, right?”

>…Next time, let’s cook together. It’s much more fun that way. It means I get to spend more time with you, after all.

“Sure! Thanks!”

>Of course. Let’s make him a meal together, he’ll enjoy that.

“Awesome! But first, we’ve gotta clean up.”

>There will be time for that later.

“Er, we should probably get to it now.”

>…

“…it was a very frightening bang.”

>I’ll get the bleach.
>>
>>30410921
>That ending

Ahhhahahah, ew.
>>
>>30410203
>Everyone already knows Spitfire is one of Shining's dick riders

That was pretty obvious by the second major Mini-arc centered around their relationship.
>>
>>30410921
>Someone remembers Arana likes Spike

Finally!
>>
>>30409608
I want you to imagine that.

Fluttershy, with a single tap, able to bring back the dead, and undo all that it meant. Nobody ever HAD to die, which meant that the only way for the world to continue it meant she had to make them, or let them die. She literally would be the one to choose life and death from then on out.

And this is FLUTTERSHY.
>>
File: 1496544301133.gif (3MB, 480x270px) Image search: [Google]
1496544301133.gif
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>>30411317
... I can work with this.
>>
>>30411317
You might as well wonder whatever happened to her scarf for Chitty.
>>
>>30411578
Actually? So can I.
>>
>Pinkie
"Cadence"
~~~

>What do you mean he left!?

"Scream again and I'll grab the pink inside and feed it to a less pink thing."

>...we're actually more red than pink inside, due to-

"Do not science me, horse! I have scienced with the best of them!"

>Have you?

"I stood next to Twilight for a super long time. I'm sure I'm at least a little smarter because of that.'

>...I don't think that's how that works-

"Two seconds."

>Fine! Just tell me where Shiny went!

"He went off to see another mare."

>...That sounds-

"I know how it sounds and I have transcended caring about it. So long as I have a list of which mare it is, I'm good."

>...

"This is my life now."

>...so can I hang out with him?

"You're on the list."

>Okay wow, that is a loose list.

"You have no idea."
>>
>>30411578
>>30411655
Well it's about time!
>>
>>30411909
Well, I mean I can work that into my Spike stories, whoever's waking him up and then tearing into him is still to be determined.
>>
>>30411975
>and then tearing into him

No worries about that one, I wouldn't have had Spike do a lot of that stuff without planning the inevitable AJ confrontation.
>>
>>30412018
OH GOD NO NOT ANOTHER KKA BEATDOWN

WHY MUST I SUFFER
>>
>>30412140
He lives to make you hurt right before he shows you it's just as planned.
>>
OOCO
>Spike
"SA"
~~~~

>And this will... help me be a better stallion?

"What? No, it's to teach you how to cook."

>...

"I mean I thought that was obvious, we're wearing aprons."

>...

"This isn't complicated."

>Is this a bonding thing with you and me, or did you just need someone to light the grill?

"Pfft, what? I have the power to literally carry fire down from space in a magic bubble to my whim, why would I need..."

>...

"I mean yes you are totally needed and important and I couldn't do it without you Spike you're the best."

>...Don't you pity me.

"I'mma hug you."

>DON'T YOU-

~~~~

>...

"...that was a lot of crying-"

>Shut up.
>>
>>30412378
Dawwwww
>>
>>30412140
It's not that bad.
>>
>>30413156
That mean's it's going to be a level higher... awful maybe... or horrific even. I hope it makes us wince in sympathy, that kinda bad.
>>
>Chrysalis
"Changeling'
~~~

She was still screaming.

It was unlikely she'd stop anytime soon.

>HOW THE FUCK DID YOU LOSE TRACK OF THE ONE, THE EXACTLY ONE CHANGELING IN THIS ENTIRE HIVE I DIDN'T WANT YOU TO LET OUT! I don't care if all of you go out, every single one in a massive fucking exodus of stupidity as you all lock hooves and dance into the snow, but the ONE CHANGELING this would be a problem for somehow made it through! How!? How did you do that?!

The shaking thing before her, looking much smaller than she should, nearly found herself curled into a solid ball and vanishing from sight after twisting impossibly into herself.

She would if she could, but physics simply would not allow it.

"He's sneaky?"

Not even when a wave of green fire erupted, and what scraggly thing on her head passed for a fin found itself shriveling in so small she nearly turned bald.

>How. Did. He. Escape?

"H-he just... slipped by! I never even-"

>HE'S A CHANGELING!

The last hope of shrinking away was dashed with a grip far too tight and far too rough that lifted the whimpering thing from her place below, forcing the smaller changeling eye level no matter how loud her whimpers made it clear it was the last place she wished to be.

>Of course he was going to slip by! That's what we DO!

"I don't know, he just sat there crying since you left him! I didn't think he would.."

That line of reasoning died down quite quickly.

>Where were you, when he escaped?

The soldier in her grasp tried to stay silent.

>I will get that information.

Until the first tingles of her mind were felt, and it all poured out.

"I WAS JUST GETTING A MI-"

A hoof thrown over her mouth came too late.

>...I see.

Nothing could stop the feeling of terror heralded by two smooth words.

"P-please don't kill me."

Even the changeling herself doubted if that request was a call for mercy or not when the Queen began to smirk.

>Well, since you said please...

1/2
>>
>>30414182

Death briefly felt the better choice.

>But you see, there's one little problem... the cell is empty. We can't have that now, can we?

With a single flick of her power, the soldier flew.

Backwards, straight into the cell that had once held the changeling that she'd been tasked to watch, straight into the empty hall to a painful fall.

>There we go... that should fix it, at least until I find Seven, don't you agree?

The whimpering thing on the floor had nothing to say in response.

>You should hope we find him quickly, because until we do find him...

With one final flick, the cell door closed.

>You'll have to stand in for him. Stay here... or see what happens when my mood gets really foul.

She heard the hoofsteps growing quieter and quieter as Her Grace walked down the hall, until they'd finally grown silent. No steps of guards came to replace her, nobody took the empty spot at the side of the cell to watch over it.

The changeling never once got up from the ground, or even uncurled from her fetal position.

"I'll just... keep it warm for him..."

She never once dreamed of escape.

"Sweet Hivemind I forgot how scary she is..."
>>
>>30414194
There's classic Chrysalis.
>>
>>30414194
Fuck, guess she still has that dark queen bit inside.
>>
>>30414390
Chrysalis is a better person than she was before. She's grown up, she's learned to love, she's learned what's important, and she's learned to be a leader and a protector, and a Queen in her own right with more than just power to her name.

But she'll always be Chrysalis, the cackling, smirking, plotting, occasionally screaming angry, powerhungry thing she was. Despite being something that can take literally any shape, there's one thing she can't do.

Change.
>>
>>30413789
>Sympathy
>For SPIKE

HAH
>>
>>30414924
Stranger things have happened
>>
NC
>Celly
"Luna"
'Cadence'

>THERE!

"RIGHT THERE"

'PAUSE IT!'

>... Well girls, we did it, we made it to the Big Screen

"It's... wonderful"

'How much screentime do you think we'll get?'

>Shh

'Wha-'

"Just savour it"
>>
Goodnight, thread
>>
>>30416401
Night anon
>>
>>30415743
10-1 they don't even get a line
>>
>Pinkie
“DT”
~~

>And welcome back to Late Night Pinkie Pie! Normally this content wouldn’t matter but I’m a dream right now, dreams are magic, and magic is real! Our guest again, back for another reading is the one, the only, Diamond Tiara!

Diamond Tiara sits across from her table, glaring at the pink pony in fortune teller garb.

“Why am I here?”

>We’re doing another reading, gotta get it in before you wake up or slip deeper into comadreams!

“Wait, am I in a coma!?”

>No spoilers! Except… for the cards!

She flips a card onto the table.

>Ahhh, the ace of wands, very important! It symbolizes all of the power and potential you have.

“Well, duh. I’m Diamond Tiara.”

>But it’s askew, meaning your potential is weighed down. Why is this, do you think?

The filly glares.

“You’re the one reading the cards!”

>Well, if I had to guess, I’d think your potential is being weighed down by your doubt. Why are you doing this? Who are you doing it for? Or was it…

She flips over another card, this one called The Wheel of Fortune.

>I see! So it all began with a random chance!

“Well, yeah. I didn’t plan to save her or anything, and not from robots! I just was trying to stop Fifty Six from taking over and, huh, it sounds kind of weird now.”

>Weird kind is the best kind! But what came next? You could be a hero, but then there’s… Ohhh, the ace of disks.

“Is that…”

She looks at the card closely, sure she recognizes the face of the pony sitting in the middle.

“Penny?”

>Wealth, fame, these are pretty tempting, aren’t they? It’s got to sound fun to be beloved and a winner by all.

“Yeah… I guess it does.”

>I mean…

Another card flips over, The Empress, with a very familiar face.

>Your mom would be proud of you… or would she?

The filly flinches and looks away.

1/2
>>
>>30417649

>You have the potential to be great, just like you want, doing a lot of good, helping a lot of ponies, getting the praise you want, but…

She flips over two cards at the same time. One, she just barely sees, the Three of Cups, and the other that falls atop it, The Demon.

>That path is dangerous, and if you follow it, you risk losing the friends you’ve made along the way. If you let that cloud you, you could cover the heart of what really drives you and made you go down this path at all… friendship, and wanting to protect those you love. Keep chasing things like fame, fortune, and power…

Without even touching it, the Demon Card completely covers the one beneath it.

>And it will consume you.

Shaken, the filly looks away.

“So what do I do?”

>I don’t know that, I can only see the immediate future, and what might happen. It might take a while, but…

Pinkie smiles, and Diamond Tiara feels a sudden weight on her back, and a hold on her chest.

>I think you’ll figure it out, and remember why you started… why he exists at all.

The filly looks back and sees TBDRLIATU on her back, with the leather strap tight around her chest like a hug.

>Remember why you made him, remember who you’re protecting… and remember what’s really important.

She flips over one last card, the world, and holds it out to her.

“…I don’t want to let them down.”

The pink filly reaches out, and takes it.

>I believe in you.

When she touches it, there’s light.

>After all, you’re pink, that’s got to count for something!

Then, it all fades away.

>You can do it, Diamond Tiara.

Diamond Tiara opens her eyes, and it’s over.

“…my head hurts.”
>>
>>30417654
Well, at least your back doesn't!
>>
>>30417802
Dude.
>>
So, Twi injected the dark goop, right?

That was what I wrote way back when, light goop to induce the coma, dark goop to begin the wake up procedure.

Time in between was for surgery and then outside discussion/planning
>>
>>30418121
...shit. My bad, that was my bad.

Might need to reveal she didn't actually wake up.
>>
>>30417654
>These are actual Tarot cards

Bravo.
>>
>>30414924
I feel a lot of sympathy for the guy. He honestly believed he was doing the right thing, and he is regretful that all went to hell.
>>
>>30418133
So, more dreams?
>>
>>30418133
Idea is we have Luna, Celly etc bonk finally into Twilight, they do... Whatever it is they're meant to do. Then poik the wake up juice into DT and plug their ears for the angry screaming
>>
>>30418708
>whatever it is they're meant to do

Mostly scream "WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!"
>>
>Pommel
“Potsticker”
~~~

>…any luck?

“No.”

>…

“…”

>…

>”WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEIR NAMES!?”
>>
>>30418708
And wait for AUJ and the others to get back.
>>
>>30419157
NC
>AUJ
“???”
~~~

>DANG IT! HOW DID AH’ FUCKIN’ GET LOST UP HERE!?

“It’s a serious problem.”

>…

“…hi.”

>…Are ya’ fuckin’ kidding me?

“I’d love to fight but we can’t stop here, this is Bat Country.”

>TARNATION!
>>
>>30414194
>Cadence
“18”
~~~

>….did you just feel a sudden shake?

“A sudden disturbance of a great deal of power?”

>A heat in the air, like an unnatural fire being born?

“A dark shadow moving unseen?”

>A tingle in the ears of a call of rage?

“A smell of an unholy smoke filling the air?”

>This…

“This could only mean one thing.”

>…go gettum girl.

“What?”

>I said nothing!
>>
>SA
“Celestia”
‘Luna’
~~~

>Are you done? I feel like you’re done.

“Wow, I feel stuffed.”

>You’re done I’m putting my hoof down.

‘Do not tell us what to do!’

SLAP!

‘OW!... SISTER!’

“Don’t spank Luna unless you spank me too.”

SLAP!

“Atta boy.”

‘Uncouth! This is all uncouth! We shall send our guards to imprison thee!’

>They’ve been banging on my shield for like an hour now.

‘…’

>Yeah, probably shouldn’t have them all be Pegasus.

‘Racist!’

>You’re the one against diversity.

“Ooooo~”

‘…NIGHT ATTACK!’

ZAP!
CRASH!

“LUNA!”

‘We were ninety percent sure he’d block that.’

“HOW!?’

‘…we’ll get the first aid kit.’

>I deserve this.

‘He said it not us!’
>>
>>30419370
So is Caddy going to go back to normal post-flurry, or is this just her now?
>>
>>30419778
Well, I'm pretty sure that we're going to go at least 3/4th to a 2/3rd of the way back to normal. She'll be almost pre-flurry but I'm sure everything will creep back up from time to time.
>>
>>30419778
OOCO
>SA
“Spike”
~~~

>Now, I’m going to teach you how to attract the mares!

“I can do that already, I’ve done it a lot.”

>Oh… well, how many of them are after you currently?

“…”

>…teach me.

“You’d better be joking-“

>PLEASE TEACH ME IT’S OUT OF CONTROL THE BED CAN’T GET ANY BIGGER!
>>
>>30419939
>Spike teaches Shiny how to lose the clingers on
~Three weeks later~
"MY WIFE LEFT ME AND I'M ALONE NOW!"

"Little grasshopper... you've become the master."
>>
>>30419815
More like she'll seem normal, but a little bit... off.
>>
CD
>Spike
"Beefy Spike"
~???~
~~

>...I don't even know.

The bigger, stronger version of himself gave off a dashing smile, just as he should.

"It's simple! We need to speak of what you've done-"

>Stop, stop it with all of this. Just all of it.

The monster behind him lets out a roaring call, only to be silenced by a single claw being held up.

>You too. Just... you too, cut it out, you obviously can't hurt me. Oh, what, if I get hurt in the dream I get hurt for real? Oh yeah! That's how this works, real great tension there!

The monster looks unsure, and shrugs.

"Look if you're not going to take this seriously."

The other version of himself vanishes, disappearing back into his head.

>...

"Aren't you going to-"

>No, I'm not going to. I don't care.

"It's the only way to talk to me-"

>I don't want to talk to you, any of you. You especially! Fuck off!

The twisted monstrosity formed from the remains of his murdered giant form huffed with all the maturity of a fillyscout, before turning around and stomping off. Right off the cliff nearby.

"I think you hurt it's feelings."

>I think I'm about to hurt my foot up your ass!

"It's your ass too."

>If you think I won't shove my foot up my own ass for petty vengeance then clearly you don't know Spike!

The voice in his head went silent for a little bit after that.

"Wow. Okay, wow. Rude. I just wanted to talk about-"

>I'm not talking about my feelings with you. I thought I made that clear with the last guy! Look what happened to him!

He gestured, only to pause halfway.

>...before the whole turning into a gore homunculus or something, I mean. That's what happened.

"Look, what is this really about? Are you feeling sad that-"

>Of course I feel sad! I feel sad for a lot of reasons! Why did you think I wasn't sad!?

"I didn't say-"

>You know what? Fuck this.

1/2
>>
>>30420565

He flicks Charity open, dropping out all the bullets that had somehow become all sorts of colorful shapes and sizes. With the chamber empty, he puts in a single real bullet.

"Whoa! Whoa now! What are you doing!?"

>What I should have done at the start.

"I won't come out if you use real bullets!"

>The horror.

"Seriously! You don't know what'll happen!"

>Yes I do.

"You can't-"

>Hey, buddy?

With a CLICK, he puts the gun to his head.

>It's just a dream, you should really just relax.

"DON'T!"

BANG!

~~~~~

>...Okay.

The pony standing over him blinked, gobsmacked that the dragon had woken up at this exact moment. For a second she was elated, her eyes sparkling with joy.

>This is fine.

Soon after they were twisted with confusion, until she followed his line of sight.

~...OH! Oh no, ah, no! No no no, this isn't... I was just... this wow, okay I know how this looks but really... it's not what it looks like!~

His unblinking eyes never looked away from the giant combination of railgun and drill she currently had floating over her shoulder, the business end pointed right at him.

~This is for Celestia!~

>...Kay, it's fine with her too.

~NO! Not like that! I didn't mean it like that! She doesn't want to.. will you stop looking at me!?~

>Twilight.

~I came here to make sure you were okay, and this is the thanks I get?~

>Twilight?

~As if I'd seriously just up and walk up to you and--~

>Twi!

~What!?~

>Do you know what barrel discipline is?

After a long pause of deciphering what that could have meant, she turned the front of the machine to the side.

~Ahem. Welcome back to the waking world.~

After a bit of thought, something struck him.

>Is Applejack back?

~She will be any minute.~

>...put me back.

~...welcome back.
>>
>>30420584
I appreciate that you did it if nothing else, but yeah, you can tell it was sudden and abrupt.
>>
>>30420584
>He's just accepting his death

Dark
>>
>>30420743
>Do it.

~Spike I'm not actually going to-~

>DOOOOO IIIIIIITTT!

SQUEAK!

>...

~I didn't charge the raildrill.~
>>
>Spike
"Twilight"
~~~

>How long was I out? Feels like days have passed.

"Like, two hours? Maybe more?"

>...Feels a lot longer.

"Yeah you're not the first to think that."

>What's the drill for?

"I think Celestia and Luna might've been eaten by Lavan."

>...

"When it rains it pours, am I right?"
>>
>>30420150
>Spike tries to teach him to drop chicks
>He ends up with fifteen kids

"Wow I literally do fail at everything.
>>
>>30421193
Shiny ends up with them or Spike?

The latter has comedy potential.
>>
>>30418699
>DT
~~

>Huh, looks like Twilight fixed me.

With a pleased little hop to her step, the pink leapt down from the edge of the bed and onto perfectly functioning hooves.

>DT likey! That's how you do it, everyone! One shot, in and out and she's dancing! Ha cha cha cha!

True to her words, she did indeed dance away.

>That's the DT they know! Moving and shaking and baking!... And also weirdly not stiff.

Her jiggying froze, just enough she could turn her head enough to look down at her hoof. Her weirdly clean, immaculate hoof.

>...And surprisingly not cut up for someone why just had major, invasive surgery on her nerves.

She remained frozen, all but that hoof that reached behind her head, and tapped on the back of her neck. She felt nothing.

>...Maybe she's just that good?

~Tea, milady?~

She didn't know what she was expecting. TBDRLIATU in a butlers outfit holding a platter of tea probably wasn't it, despite that.

>Aw, shit.
>>
>>30421260
>I failed so hard I got a harem... wait, is that winning? Oh fuck did I just

"I want a divorce.""

>SHIT
>>
>>30419370
>Caddy gets randy over Chrysalis going god mode

HAH!
>>
>>30419531
Shiny you're asking for it now.
>>
>Twilight
"Spike"
~~~

>So, how are you feeling?

"Like I've got a hole in my gut, but the front part isn't hole."

>Sounds accurate.

"You?"

>Realizing that my breath is probably what woke you up, and my helium infused hayburger isn't making my sneak any better.

"You have a problem."

>Yeah, no hayburgers. That's a serious issue.

"How are you not fat?"

>I convert my calories into magic and do magic stuff. One magical attempt to turn water into wine and then bam, no chubby twili. Why do you think you see so few fat unicorns?

"...That feels like cheating."

>Well I'm sorry, we don't literally have magically enhanced stamina or wingpower that burns off ten times the calories walking could, we've got to find our own way around it.

"Huh, what can dragons do then?"

>Judging by your pudge? We'll work on it.

"You suck."

>No, you suck.

"...you still mad at me?"

>Unbelievably so, but I'm not jerky enough to punch a baby dragon with a hole in his stomach.

"Back to that?"

>Locked in that for the rest of time, baby dragon.

"...Any chance I'm going back to sleep?"

>Not if I have anything to say about it, not before Celestia has a go at you.

"..."

>I won't hurt you, but I will watch.

"...you're the best big sister slash maternal figure."

>Clearly not, but I'm working on it.
>>
>>30422053
Face it, he wants it. he loves it when mares hurt him.

It's the only time they let him feel.
>>
>AUJ
~~~~

It hurt.

Her chest hurt, her side hurt, her body hurt, her head hurt, her soul hurt.

Everything hurt. Everything was pain.

>Ah' won't let you down.

She did not slow her flight.

Through the storm, through sunny skies, through the air above a ruined landscape, it would not be slowed. A mission burned in her heart, set fire to her soul, made her every beat of furious wings more determined than the last in a burst of power that never seemed to reduce, only grow. No broken body could stop her, no weakened wings could hold her back, no taken power could end her.

She was too stubborn to let something like the pain inside, the internal failure of something within her, ever come close to stopping her.

She was Princess Applejack, not the one of this earth but a Princess all the same, and she'd failed.

A war had been fought, and lost, and she could not let her mistake, her failure, lead to one more injured. On her shoulders she took it all, never once thinking that the mare who truly belonged in this world should have stepped up instead. Why would she?

Only she could be the light in this time of need.

>Ah'll get there before her...

Only she could sound the alarm, and keep the monster from ever reaching the city.

>Ah' couldn't save you...

Only she, and no other.

>But if it takes everything... Ah'll protect you.

Across Equestria, she flew.

>Ah'm coming.

She could only pray she wasn't too late.
>>
>>30422825
"AUB"

"Gee, when on earth is mah sis comin' back? She was meant to give me mah bow back last week"
>>
>>30422905
~AUT~

~ I'm getting right on that. Working on it right now, I swear, I'll get it done any minute now.~

"Don'tcha have ta... type in something? Cast some spells? Like... read?"

~Back before you know it.~

"Does crossin' yer' wings like that hurt?"

~Any. Minute. Now.~
>>
>>30422945
I don't know what she was expecting her why she thought this would end well
>>
>>30423248
Honesty and obedien they go together so well don't they
>>
Night thread!
>>
>>30424387
Morning
>>
>>30422945
>secretly, it's one big party over there
>>
>>30422905
I'm now imagining this horrible scenario where nobody told AUBloom her sister got abducted, and it's been weeks.

She still hasn't noticed.
>>
>>30425260
>AUJ comes home
>Decides family actually is important.
>Runs home
doesn't even recognize the filly she sees.
Appleoom doesn't recognize her either.
>>
>>30422379
>Back to being a baby

Spike is suffering.
>>
>>30425410
My heart.
>>
>>30422905
Applebloom gave the ribbon to her years ago to trick her into returning it and to come visit. Never happened.
>>
>Twilight
“Spike’
~???~
(???)
~~~

>Well if you’re okay, then I’ve got some work to do.

“You really do not seem worried for someone saying a firegod ate the princesses.”

>Nahhh, he’s pretty nice, I was just kidding. He probably just had a lot to talk about or got distracted by something on the floor, it happens all the time. That’s not an exaggeration, I don’t keep that room spotless for some sci fi asthetics, he literally will just up and forget what’s happening and look at whatever spot is on the floor for extended periods if I don’t stop him. He’s like a cat, more than some kind of eldritch horror with unfathomable power.

“…okay?”

>So, no worries. But there is a slight chance he distorted time and unless I stop him, the princesses won’t come out for a week, which considering our current problem means they could be facing an endless hellscape ruled by a glowing thingaling beneath a city.

“…”

>That was-

“My fault, I know.”

>Probably, but I have no proof. So, if you don’t mind sit tight, hold still, and let Big Twi show her honeys how science works-

SLAM!

~Hey sis!~

>GAHHHHHH!

SHOOM!

~SWEET MERCIFUL CELESTIA!~

(STOP USING MY NAME LIKE THAT!)

>IT’S OUT OF CONTROL! AHHHHH!

~AHHHHHH!~

(AHHHHHHH!)

“Thanks for coming to visit, really.”

>(~AHHHHHHHHHHHH!~)
>>
>>30426140
This is why you practice trigger discipline !
>>
>>30426140
>Pommel
“Potsticker”
~~~

>…

“…Oh, right. Shit, we were supposed to be watching the princesses, weren’t we?”

>…

“Ah whoops.”

>OH FUCK!
>>
>>30426321
Some things never change.
>>
>>30426321
>Guard
“Guard 2”
~~~

DOIOING!

>OUR PRINCESS NEEDS US!

“Concussions can curb conveniently currently!”

>WE HAVE WORK TO DO!
>>
>56
“Silver Spoon”
~~

>So I pretty much am not allowed near the bar anymore, not that I was in the first place, but they’ve put down fly traps. That’s pretty much the short of it. Probably could have cut right to that.

“I didn’t ask for any of this. I just wanted to know how you were doing.”

>Ahhh, Silver Butt! You don’t have to ask that! I should be asking you!

“I’m mostly just stewing in regret and thanking my lucky stars that one guy I thought was going to backstab me and be an asshole wasn’t actually an asshole. Could’ve probably left me, collapsing building and all, but he didn’t.”

>Is that why you uh…

“It’s why I have a fruit basket, yes. He is getting a fruit basket. I don’t know if he likes fruit, but the basket is pretty nice anyway, he could use that. Cool basket.”

>I still think it’s some kind of secret plot to gain your trust, probably to win you over to his side whenever he decides to kill all ponies!

“Little much.”

>SilverFlanks, you don’t watch a guy try to murderify your Cuz and then think he’s not so bad cause he has a master plot. Not even like, the Chitty master plot, the bad kind.

“You look sad. Please tell me-“

>I’m never going to get to snuggle that plot!

“And there it is.”

>Ruined! My chances are ruined! I’ll never know the soft, or hard, wuggle snuggle of the biggest buggle rumple! I’ll never know!

“Ponies are dead.”

>And that really sucks.

“…”

>I’m learning to deal with stuff like that in a constructive manner.

“Which is… crying over lost plots.”

>Beats crying over a bunch of other things!

“That’s… accurate?”

>…

*Slap*

“Leave the fruit basket alone.”

>But it’s so shiny!

“Leave it be!”
>>
>>30426991
>Hey, remember the time I poured chocolate milk all over your-

“I don’t regret what came before, but I’m not in the mood.”

>Awwww.
>>
CD
>Delight
"Siegfried"
~~~~

>Prince Siegfried-

A talon shoots up.

"Ah. Just 'Siegfried' will be fine. No need to be so stuffy when we're both aiming to let our hair down, so to speak. Oh, speaking of! You ponies have a lot of that. Like, I could probably build three nests out of those shiny locks of yours."

>Let's not test that theory, please.

"Just saying! Does it take a lot of work to keep up that crystal-like sheen?"

>Just brushing and water. The rest comes naturally.

"Ah. And when do you expect the whole 'flowing mane full of stars and glitter' thing to come into effect?"

>When I finally become an alicorn.

"Seems like a 'Mares Only' sort of club. You might need to crank up the whole 'metro' look a few dials just to get more than a passing glance."

>I'm already rocking a 7. Going up to an 8? Or, Faust forbid, a 9? Not for me.

"What about... a 10?"

>The dial doesn't go that high... It /shouldn't/ go that high.

"You... you've seen it?"

>Mmm... The sacrifices... just aren't worth it.

"..."

>...

Siegfried reaches out, his claws gently tugging at Delight's face.

"... You're... This is real, right?

>Yesh.

"I'm not hallucinating?"

>No.

"...Fun times await, pony."

>...Yay.
>>
>>30427185
I feel this.

I like them being bros and broing it up, everyone else thinks they're assholes and can't stand them but they get each other's unique brand of humor.

I like it!
>>
>>30427274
There's unquestionably some potential in the pairing, the unsure guy who puts on a face just to try to look good and the guy who's nothing but sure but isn't as great as he thinks he is. Nice dichotomy of a guy who thinks he's nothing and is a little better than that and a guy who thinks he's everything and isn't quite that.

Siegfried is undoubtedly a great fighter, he's got a silver tongue, and he's pretty smart, but what I like about him is that while he brags, he's not as strong as his brother, he's not as crafty as his sister, and he's not that smart when you get to the nit and gritty. Delight I've barely seen enough to judge, in fighting at the very least, but he seems okay in debating and the like, so maybe he's got that going for him. The setup is there, they just need to stick the landing.
>>
>Pinkie
“Guard”
~~~

>…

“HNGGHHHH!”

>Oh crap! Two’s over here!?

“Hnngg.”

>Looks like she did a singing number too… in rapport?

“Hrnng.”

>Definitely a rapport. Ooof, this is going to be a problem. I’d better catch her before Shiny finds out she’s over here, he didn’t want her to know about the WAKKAWAKKAWAKKKA thing till he could contextualize it personally.

“Hnnggn.”

>Yeah, he’s a good dad. Total Dilf.

“…ghnng?”

>Dude Is Loving Father, obviously! Have you never heard of Dilf? Get out more, colt!

“…”

>What?

“Htnnn.”

>That’s for me to know, and you to find out. Pinkie out!

Without fanfare, any noise, or even a moonwalk, she trotted out.

“…hgn?”

>Subtly is key!
>>
>>30427551
Pinkie.

Pinkie Pie.

You're fooling NOBODY
>>
>>30427781
>Twilights bro, has got it going on. Twilight's bro, has got it going on-

"DON'T YOU DARE!"
>>
>Twilight
"SA"
(Celestia)
{Luna}
~Spike~
~~~

>WHAT!?

"WHAT!?"

(We're not repeating that.)

{That was a long enough explanation the first time!}

(I think this actually took longer than us learning from Lavan.)

{Hours, at least!}

>...WHAT!?

(Do not make me repeat myself, I am Celestia Sol Ivictus-)

"Is that really your name?"

(...ahem.)

>It wouldn't make much sense, would it? Like, is she Luna, Sol Ivictus? It means the sun.

{Wouldn't be the first time she got preferential treatment.}

(We are not starting this again.)

"I agree, I think we have more to worry about with the FREAKING FRAGMENT OF GOD!"

~That I let out.~

"Spike, I love you like the brother I never see, but do not make this about you."

~Fair enough.~

{And if thee were listening for two seconds, thou would know tis but a theory, we've no proof aside from the location, powerset, and our own personal connection... it could still be Death Goblins or something.}

>It's clearly not death goblins.

{Thou does not know that.}

"Okay, so, what do we do? Bigger shield? Shield with little spikes?"

>Shiny.

"I have one mode and it's bubbles, don't get on my case about this."

>Look, we just need to gather the girls, put in a plan, and get to this before it ever gets out. If we do this right, then we never have to know what it really is, we'll win all the same. Preparation, not reaction, alright?

(An excellent idea, my most faithful student! I taught you well!)

{Coughcoughcredithog.}

(Shut up.)

>Then it's settled, we're starting preparation now!

(...)

{...}

"...can we-"

>We're not using bubbles.

~Can we-~

>We're not shooting it.

~...~

({Can we-})

>We can get cake while we think.

{Okay, thine student is the best.}

(Told you so.)
>>
>>30428269
Dat banter tho
>>
>>30426991
HOLY SHIT SOMEONE REMEMBERED THAT SS AND 56 KNOW EACH OTHER
>>
>>30426059
Why
>>
>>30428688
... I'm not sure what you mean, do you mean why would she do that? To see her uber busy sister. Why AUJ never bothered to visit? She's become an unfeeling work machine that's detaching herself from her personal connections for the "greater good" of everyone.

If you're wondering why I posted that, it's cause I'm eeeeeeevil~!
>>
>PJ
"Daw"
~~

>So then I stabbed him.

"...It kinda feels like that should've been my story."

>Hey, I'm the sneaky superbug with a need for secrecy and a bigger need for making sure my identity never got out, if there was anyone who would be within stabbing range with a stabbing need, it would likely be me.

"Fair enough, but I'm a pirate."

>Don't you guys have cannons and hoofguns?

"Cannon, yes. Hoofgun, no. Those just got invented last year."

>...Wait.

"..."

>...

"...Huh, thinking on it..."

>...

"How... how did we make the big one first, but never..."

>...Oh dear Hivemind, something is wrong here.

"THIS WORLD IS UPSIDE DOWN!
>>
>Guard
"Guard 2"
~???~
~~

>...Wow, we are lost.

"I don't even know where we were going in the first place."

>Well it wasn't to the edge of the city.

"Or was it? Is this how it ends for us?"

>Okay we are not so terrible you need to think about jumping."

"Or are we?"

>Are you fucking with me right now?

"Am I?"

>...I think we should see other guards-

With a flash, a boom of thunder, a force stuck the edge of the city with more power than any bolt of lightning could have ever held in the darkest storm, let alone the bright and sunny skies that shined down upon the fair city. With the force of that blast alone, the pair so perilously close to the edge of the city were scattered, cast away in separate directions, unable to hold their stance beneath the sheer force that rocked them.

From the crumbling dust, a tip of a golden mane emerged, and from there the edge of a bright red bow that held it back. Both guards, warriors still of the city no matter their stature, found themselves shaking in the battle stance they had smoothly rolled into, unnerved by the steel eyes behind the cracked spectacles that looked down upon them.

~Find every single one of the guards, and tell them to prepare, we need to get ready...~

The demands they'd prepared to speak, the call out to her to pay for the sidewalk damaged in the blast, it all fell away. Underneath that voice, they were compelled, unable to disobey no matter what they thought of such matters.

They didn't even realized they'd moved until they felt their own hooves touch the top of their heads in salute.

~...It isn't over yet.~

None who lived in Canterlot would ever hear it, or know of it.

None heard when they began to sound the alarm.

~We've got to be ready.~
>>
>>30429096
>AUJ's already back

S-She's fast!
>>
>>30429096
>Canterlot is on alert again

Why does everybody keep living there?
>>
>>30429457
>Implying anywhere else is better

Fillydelphia got wrecked TWICE and nobody even bothered to try to warn them. A city in the middle of fuck off nowhere got EATEN BY GOD.

Roll the dice motherfucker, you're still doomed.
>>
>>30429096
>...On who's authority?
>>
>>30429525
...Actually, they might not know that's actually Applejack.

I mean she didn't get out very much, even if these guys eventually learned there's a NotJAck running around they'd have very little chance of knowing the nuances of her appearances and personality, and since this one is clearly trying to warn them even if they know it's not their AJ they would just have to take one look at her and they'd still probably be like "OH SHIT CODE RED!"

A city just got eaten, this is not the time to fuck around.
>>
Been cutting through the Not-exactly-the-Canadian-Rockies today, and MAN seeing all those mountains and streams and all the slopes of crumpled, landslide rock made me realise

Equestria is beyond fucked from the MechaChitty Fight

Their landscape, ecology, starting from the peaks and downwards, is completely messed up.

You've got landslides from the mountains clogging up watery ways and fucking over the water cycle, arid farmland is either going to be heavily thirsted out or itself buried under residue, weather systems go kablooie as natural obstacles get facelifted, any and all wildlife near each impact site or battlefield has been blasted to a messy pulp that used to go "Squeak", homes are shattered, cities shellshocked, farmland left unbalanced. Did I mention waterways yet?

Man, KKA, you've fucking murdered Equestria as far as it's nature went
>>
>>30429575
To be fair he only had her land exactly two times, and neither were in major areas. One of them was a literal fucking desert.

But then Second Anon really wanted to drive home how bad it went and literally straight up pulled lakes, rivers, and three different mountains out of nowhere, and when asked where this was just said "Well it didn't say that but you can infer that the lake got exploded in this fight we followed for every punch but didn't see."

KKA wanted a grand fight with a small amount of areas getting wrecked in a massive over the top slugfest, but then we just had to be "Well if you're going to do that then EVERYTHING IS DEAD"

This is why I tried to argue against it, for all the good that did.
>>
>>30429601
Honestly? I like where he was coming from, even if I'll concede to you that the execution is flawed. While no, it was never a problem for us(Every time Chitty wrecked something in the past we took a while to fix it, or in some cases like Fillydelphia showed the damage could be long lasting if not permanent), there's still a lot of times when massive destruction is just glossed over, especially in Kaiju battles. It's just a thing that happens don't think too much about it. I like the idea of putting a direct small face on it, but as said our followup was massively flawed due to these areas not being present during the short times they landed in the mostly aerial fight. For what was almost entirely above ground a whole lot of places sure found their ways to be hit with more firepower than was being thrown around most days. So no, I don't blame KKA, he very much took care of how that battle went, but I instead have to point out that it was us in our attempt to give it more weight that we overstepped what happened in the story and as a result did more damage to Equestria ourselves than two battling titans did!

Truly, we are the monsters.

Fortunately >>30429575 is wrong cause we can literally fix it via magic, Twilight repaired a dam in two seconds solo, the alicorns working together could easily undo pretty much all of it. I mean if we're gonna pull off that this damage came out of nowhere we can't deny the canon reasons we can fix it. Shit, when Discord gets out he can snap it back in place, literally! Equestria will be fine.
>>
>>30429712
>the alicorns working together could easily undo pretty much all of it.

Gee I sure hope this actually happens and isn't brushed off consistently and left to fester, I mean it's not like that's ever happened before and had horrible consequenc-

oh
>>
>>30429575
>You've got landslides from the mountains clogging up watery ways and fucking over the water cycle,
Only one mountain got hit and it was in a desert.
> arid farmland is either going to be heavily thirsted out or itself buried under residue,
There weren't any farms in their landing spots.
>eather systems go kablooie as natural obstacles get facelifted,
Ponies control the weather.
> any and all wildlife near each impact site or battlefield has been blasted to a messy pulp that used to go "Squeak",
This one's right.
>homes are shattered
What?
>cities shellshocked
WHAT!?
>farmland left unbalanced.
HOW!?
>Did I mention waterways yet?
What waterways!?

Where did you see this in the fight? Seriously, I know it was long but I can't have missed this much.

>>30429735
Yeah we should get them on it eventually. It's like the same day/the next day after the big fight, so it's not like this is a month long issue, but yeah. Let's not abandon them.
>>
>>30429601
NC
>Chitania
~~~~~

>HOLY SHIT!... DID I DO THAT!? I mean holy shit that lake! WHEN DID I EXPLODE A LAKE!?... Wow, maybe they were right. They told me "You're not yourself when you're on rage", and I just brushed them off! Told them "I just need a little bit to get me going", and look at what happens! There's a fucking MOUNTAIN fallen over there! When did I even do that!?... Okay, fine, I'll admit it. I have a problem... but I'm not stopping. I just can't live without rageahol!
>>
>>30429832
NC
>Chitania
"Spike"
'Rarity'
~Chrysalis~
(AJ)
~~~

>This is stupid.

(Thank ya'll for joining us on this meeting of Rage Anonymous. We sound like angry basket weavers but we break lives, not hearts.)

"Should I really be here? I wasn't super angry."

(Yes.)

'Darling I more made a mistake-'

(YES.)

~...No comment.~

(Smart gal.)

>Fine. Everyone, I'm addicted to rageahol and it got my best friend killed!

~GASP!~

>Not me, personally, the other rageahol in my life. The one with he killer robot. I rageahold at her.

(This metaphor is breaking down.)

~Like her life!~

"'~OHHHHHHHHH!~'"

>..Need a hit.

(DANG IT! Who let her bring the rage to the dang meeting!? We were supposed to confiscate that!)

>You can't hold the RAGE!

"I get that reference-OH SHIT!"
>>
>>30429878
I dunno, I feel like this is going to mellow Chitty out.

Obviously
>>
>>30429878
NC
>Chitania
"Pony"
~~~

>Huh, guess I should try to fix this or some shit...

~~~~

"OH DEAR FAUST!"

>Punching was not the answer.

"EVERYTHING IS DEAD!"

>Look I have to get the important thing out of the way first. I have two modes.

"AHHHHHH!"

>Just be happy I have another mode.
>>
>>30430306
>thus used to be 42s gag

Oh how the mighty have fallen
>>
...Soooooooo, Rarijack bonding.
How do we do that?
>>
>>30431328
Well first... we stop talking about it... and after that we-
>>
>>30431328
You write it
>>
>>30431328
>>30431605
just do it
>>
>>30430723
42 gets to be awkward and have way more fun with way more storage. She's grumpy
>>
>>30428617
But not that SS has a crush on him.

Such is life.
>>
>Pommel
"Potsticker'
~~~~

>...

"...Did you give that silent alert?"

>Nope. Was this your idea and you forgot about it?

"Nope."

>...

"..."

>"ShhhiiiIIIIIIIITTTTT!"
>>
>>30433057
>By the way, I'm totally into you.

"Really!?"

>Yes, this is prudent information while I'm deeply traumatized by the horrors I've just seen.

"...feel like you're fucking with me here."

>Good.
>>
>10
"BBB"
~~~~

>You feel that, BBB?

"BZZZT! DETECTING NEAR SILENT SOUNDS BEING PLAYED ALL OVER CANTERLOT! CERTAIN INDIVIDUALS ARE TAKING COMBATIVE STANCES, WEAPON SYSTEMS ARE COMING ONLINE!"

>You know what that means?

"DANGER IS IMMANENT!"

>BBB? I thought I knew you by now. No, it means.. there's a scoop coming. Get ready to roll!'

"BLUEBLOODBOT! SHIFT FORM AND ROLL FILM!"

>Why do you keep saying that?

"IT REMINDS ME OF HOME."

>...I like it!
>>
>>30431328
>AJ
"Rarity"
~Dash~
~~

>Rarity, will you stop?

"Hrmph!"

>You ain't getting ahead of me.

"I just have to fly faster!"

~That would be lovely. Both of you do that, exactly that, fly faster.~

>Ah'm flyin' as fast as Ah' can!

"And I clearly would rather be ahead of her!"

~And you're both just soooo sloooowwwww. This is painful. This hurts me to see, I want you to feel what you're doing to your friend, this hurts flying this slow. My wings are stiff and it's all your fault!~

>Ain't the first time a pair of mares made yer' wings stiff.

~You did not! It's a rumor! A RUMOR IT'S JUST HAIR!~

"Pfft... I didn't just laugh at that."

>Sure.

"HRMPH!"

>Oh sure, now ya' fly a bit faster.

~Focus on that word, a bit. Tinnnyy little bit.~

>Like yer' last date?

~What does that even mean!?~

"Heh... HRMPH!"

>That's as good as Ah'm gettin', ain't it?

"You don't even deserve that!"

~I agree.~

>Dash!

~Loyalty doesn't reach that far, Applejack! I have limits and you crossed them with the mares comment!~

>...this is gonna be a long flight home.

~It wouldn't be if you two would move your big asses!~

>....

"..."

~I didn't mean it like that!~

>"Heh."

~Screw you both!~

"At the same time?...Oh drat."

>HAW!

~HATE!~
>>
>>30433509
So our Dash is canonically straight?
>>
>>30433578
>Hi, I'm Rainbow Dash. You might know me as the best thing ever. I've gotten a lot of requests to fly with certain groups and be a beacon for young adults. While I do support these measures, as I am a magical talking pony in a land with reeeeaalllllllllyyyy skewed gender ratios, I would just like to make it clear... I LOVE THE CO-

~TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES!~

"Howdy, Ah'm Applejack, and as the great Faust intended it's supposed to be one mare and one sta-"

~PLEASE STAND BY!~

'Hi, I'm princess Twilight, and no you can't change your sex-'

~PLEASE!~

-Hi, I'm Pinkie Pie, and one thing I love about parties? Making sure to bring the rubbers--

~JUST HOLD ON!~

(Never date below your social class, darling-)

~ANY MINUTE NOW!~

=Hi, I'm Chrysalis and I'm legally obligated to inform you that rape is defined as-=

~WAIT!~=youtoldmetodothisasshole!=

{Hi, I'm princess Cadence, and occasionally you might feel the need to bring another partner into your relationship in a totally non-sexual way}

~COME ON!~

*Hi, I'm Shining Armor... and marriage is the best!*

~....~

*That's all.*

~Good enough! We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.~

^And welcome back to Sex Tips, with Queen Chitania. First off, making sure that they won't die, this is super important-^

~OH COME ON!~
>>
>>30433663
>^And welcome back to Sex Tips, with Queen Chitania. First off, making sure that they won't die, this is super important-^

I want this.

I want this show.
>>
>>30433578
Everyone loves the dick.
>>
>>30433663
^And now I'm going to teach you ladies one of my 'finishers': The Pelvic Pulverizer. Guaranteed to blow your mind and dislocate his hips! Come here, Flash.^

+Uh, isn't there some one else you could use? I'm still trying to buff out the dents from yesterday...+

^No. Lie on the table.^

+Wh-what about Fizzle?+

^Busy with his own show. Get on the table.^

~~~~

[YOU CALL THIS A FLAMBE?! THIS LIMP-WRISTED, LUKEWARM PIECE OF GARBAGE IS A FLAMBE TO YOU?! I WANT THAT FIRE SO HOT, I WANT THAT MEAT SO FUCKING FLAMING THAT IT COMES OUT AS FLAM-GAY!]
>>
OOCO
>Flash
“Fizzle”
~Sweet Note~
~~~~

>…

“…”

~Okay, so strip poker wasn’t the best idea-~

>This is insensitive and insulting.

“This is dumb!”

~But come on, you guys gotta learn poker! What if you have to roll in a high stakes game for the fate of our future endeavors and you have to get the winning hoof to get it all!?~

>Then I’ll just hide under the table until Chitania is done wrecking the place.

“And then I’ll be like FWOOSH BITCHES I’M A DRAGON! GIMME ALL YOUR SHIT! What’re you going to do?”

~Win the game?~

“HA! You ain’t got shit-“

~Full house.~

“…”

FWOOSH!

~GAH!~

“I’m a dragon! Gimme all your shit-“

(DID YOU JUST BURN MY TABLE!?)

“N-no ma’am.”

(I BETTER NOT SEE A BURNT TABLE IN THERE!)

“Y-you won’t.”

(GOOD!)

“…”

~…~

>…I feel like there’s a deep moral lesson to be had right there.

~Your poker chips are fake.~

“Just take them already!”
>>
>>30433907
>Gordon Ramsey Fizzle

... i kind of like that better than the Chitty thing.
>>
>Lucky Strikes
“Steam Guage”
‘Haymaker’
~~~

>Aw crap.

“Here we go again!”

‘See this? This is why I laughed at you when you said it was over.’

>Ahhhh, go get ready to hit something with your hoof really hard, that’ll fix it.

‘HEY! I chucked a rock right at Chitania myself, I’ll have you know!’

“Do you really think she felt it?”

‘Guess we’ll never know.’

>Oh, right…

“…”

‘…does it kind bother anyone else she’s just… dead?’

>A little.

“I’d be lying if I said no.”

‘I mean, she’s just… gone. All those battles, all that time spent worrying about her, and bam. It’s over.’

“I’ll admit, it’s a bit of a relief.”

>Let’s not think too hard on that one, lest we slip into… unfortunate mindsets.

‘Like if this was so easy to get rid of her, how easy would it be if we did it all the time?’

>That, exactly that, don’t think that.

‘Pfft, both of my friends are ex criminals who could have easily been axed and nobody would have cried about it, I’m not exactly hungering to do that to anyone else. Not even our now dearly departed superbug.’

>Fair enough.

“…I’m kinda glad-“

>Keep it to yourself.

“Right. Right… into the fray once more?”

>We’re the Guard of Equestria, we’re always in the fray.
>>
>>30433231
...I dunno why but it makes me twitch seeing 56 curse, even if that was just a little whatever blurb.
>>
>Dash
“AJ”
‘Rarity’
~~~~

>UGGGHHH! MOVE YOU TWO!

“Ah’ can’t go any faster!”

‘We’re trying, really! But I’m tired enough as it is!’

>I just saw that not-you fly off like a friggen rocket through the sky, so I don’t know, use magic!

“There’s an… unfortunate explanation fer’ that one.”

>Magic it up!

‘My magic is unstable enough as it is, I’m not letting it out!’

“Wait, really?’

‘I’m not talking to you!’

>Wait, really?

‘Yes, friend who did not do something so foolish and dangerous, really!’

>…have you met me?

‘I’ve barely used it at all since the incident, I don’t even dare to think what would happen if I tried to use it now for something I’ve never tried before!’

“That ain’t right, Rarity. Iffin’ ya’ bottle it up, it’ll just come out at the worst time and go crazy, trust me on this one.”

‘You ask that too much!’

“…Ah’ really do.”

>Fine, then just… do a wind attack! Ride on the backdraft to reduce any wind resistance and it’ll let you move the current up faster and higher, if you go into a semi-freefall we’ll also be able to use the vertical speed to…

“…”

‘…’

>…Wow, the one time I actually need Twilight to make it sound simpler…
>>
>Lightning Dust
“Soarin’
‘Fleetfoot’
~~~

>WONDERBOLTS MOBILIZE!

“They did. They’re mobilized. It happened already.”

>What!? On who’s orders!?

‘Yours.’

>I didn’t order anything before now!

“Yes you did.”

>BULLSHIT!

‘You specifically said ‘if the silent alarm is triggered, immediately mobilize to posts and battlestations and prepare. Do not wait for me or I’ll yell really loud at you.’

>Oh, right…

“…”

‘…’

>…MOBILIZE HARDER OR I’LL YELL AT YOU!

“Yes ma’am.”

‘Right away ma’am. We’ll do what we were doing but…’harder’.’

>I’m best captain.
>>
>>30434973
>Rarity is bottling it up

No way this could go wrong!
>>
>AB
“SB”
‘SL’
~Grand Pear~
~~~~

>How are ya’ll pullin’ this cart? Not ta’ be offensive or anythin’, but…

The elder smiled, looking back with a smile at the three fillies, one unconscious mare, and one dog riding atop a cart filled to the brim with pears.

~Appearances can be deceiving.~

“Why does everyone always say that? We can see that you look like a skeleton here! That doesn’t explain how you’re still doing that!”

>Sweetie!

“I apologize for nothing.”

~You’re a strange batch. Specially that one, I reckon.~

‘I fear death.’

>She’s been actin’ funny for a while.

~Is everyone back at your place like this? You know, family… siblings? They crazy too?~

>Mah’ sister’s lost her dang mind on like three occasions, Ah’ feel like bein’ a princess has bout broke her brain at this point.

All of them noticed when he began to slow down.

~A princess… so it was her…~

>Mister?

“Reality is taking hold!”

>Mister!

He just stared right on ahead, not even blinking.

>MISTER!

~Hm? Oh, sorry. Reckon I lost myself for a little bit there. I’m impressed, didn’t know I was in the presence of royalty.~

>You’re not!

“He means you.”

>Ah’m not a royal!

“But… your sister is. Doesn’t that make you royalty?”

>…wait. Am Ah’!? Sweet Apple Acres! Ah’ am Ah’ think!... Or maybe not. Maybe it’s just them? Twilight never said she was royalty till she got her wings… mah’ heads gonna split.

~Haven’t you asked her?~

>Ah’ don’t see her as much as Ah’ want.

~Oh… that’s a shame.~

>Naw, she’s gotten a lot better recently.

~Well that’s still not right, you should stick together for as long as you can… everything goes bad when you split a pair.~

>Technically it’s a trio, but Ah’ see mah’ brother all the time.

~Well that’s-~

‘I fear death. The split is coming.’

1/2
>>
>>30435662

~Alright, I didn’t want to be a bother, but is she alright?~

“She’s just worried about the split in the road.”

~What? Child, I haven’t walked these roads in what has felt like a lifetime… maybe more. But I know it enough to know this is a straight line right on to ponyville, there isn’t any split in-SWEET PEARJUICE!~

His hooves moved as fast as they could, to no avail. He’d walked too far into the crack in the middle of the road, and there was no time to back off before he was sliding down towards the sheer drop and the darkness witin.

“I probably should have been more specific….AHHHHH”

>TARNANATION! AHHHHH!

‘This is the death… let it come.’

Their wails followed them as they all fell down.
>>
>>30435668
Now that's how you begin an oddessy!
>>
>>30435777
Or the land of the lost
>>
>>30435668
Only the CMC can start with rocket and end up being sucked into a chasm beneath the earth
>>
>>30435912
Fuck you now the song is stuck in my head!
>>
>Rarity
"AJ"
'Dash'
~~

>Are we going the right way?

"Ya'll don't know which way Canterlot is!?"

'Don't you?'

"Ah' was flyin' at six bazillion miles an hour when a friggen giant ass broke me! How do ya' think Ah' saw anything!?"

'...was it actually her ass?'

>Dash.

'I have to know."

"All Ah' saw was black!"

'...did you rape Chitania?'

>DASH!

'I have to know!'

"Other me was flyin'."

'That's not better.'

"Iffin' it makes you feel any better, Chitania was the one pounding her so hard she went into the dirt later."

>...

'...'

"That came out wrong."

>WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU ALL!?
>>
>>30435668
IT TRULY BEGINS
>>
>42
~~~

>SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT!

Her movements were like fireworks, flashes of light that speckled across the city of Canterlot.

She'd sensed the alert, hidden from the populace that moved around without care even as the guard's took their places and readied a defense against a foe that had no face. The alert, though far reaching, held little to define it. What was to come and what awaited those who defended the city had yet to be understood.

She had an inkling.

>Could she really be trying something in revenge?

There was only one foe left, all others had died. Only one threat that could still turn, burned by the feeling in her own heart and ready to strike at those who had wounded her without a single touch. Only one sprung to mind with all others fallen, and her network telling her that no such movement had been made from the city beneath the rubble.

Without the threat of a devouring light, there was simply no other it could be. Chitania, Sunset, their allies, all slain. No other remained.

None but the child who's mother had been taken from her in a violent fire.

>What's her plan...

She noticed nothing odd about the guards movements, no taste of magic that only a changeling could see.

Even still, even without magic, something off was present.

>What could she want to do...

Her hooves stung a little harder every time she landed, her breath shorter still every time she reappeared in reality. Her body ached, and felt so very stiff.

She'd yet to stop her flight.

>...I've got to stop her.

Where the changeling lie, she could not even venture a guess.

So instead, she could only wildly search.

To the ends of the earth, if she needed.

>I'm the only one who can.

To finally enact the plan she'd prayed she'd never have to use.

>I will do all I can to spare you, Thirteen... but I will not let you win.
>>
>>30436848
Got a little shonen up in here.
>>
>>30436925
>Ora... I won't let you disgrace Chitin house, 13 San!

"You stand no chance, 42 Sama! I have the secret technique of House Titan... MMMIINNNDUUU BREAAAKKAAAAAA!"

>Nani!? This move!

"Uuwwwahhhhhh!"

>Then you leave me no choice, I must stop holding back.... HHHUUGUUUUPAAAUNNCHHH!

>"AHHHHHHHHHHHH
>>
>>30437180
>Her mind is so fast, the eye can barely follow it!

"Okay I might've mindzotzed you too hard."

>I must use the ultimate technique... YAMERROOOOOOO!

"She's been screaming for an hour, I'm honestly worried she has heatstroke."

>FINAL BLAST!

"Third time she pretended to shoot something."

>FOR MY FAMILY!

"...this is why I read comic books"
>>
>>30437399
>13 loves capeshit

Chitto should have hit her harder
>>
>>30437839
TWO LOVEBOMBS WEREN'T ENOUGH
>>
Night threaded
>>
>>30438721
morning pal!
>>
File: IMG_1537.jpg (29KB, 480x360px) Image search: [Google]
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>>30437937
2 LOVEBOMBS?
>>
>>30437937
Burn It to the Ground! It's the only way to be sure! Wait, she's in which city. Never mind, it never works
>>
>>30437180
That was worryingly accurate. ...
>>
>>30440124
>13 dono! Do no fall into the darkness!

"Sukooo... you think you can tell me what to do!? MINDU BLASTA!"

>Gaaahhhhhh!

"Now we're going to-wait why didn't you roll or anything when I did that? You just kind of froze while the world moved."

>Animation is expensive.
>>
>Cheerilee
"77"
'Fluttershy'
~~~~

>Sweetie! Thank goodness, it's horrible!

"Oh for loves sake what now!? Did a skeleton get out!?"

>Worse!

"Did a gazer turn them into stone?"

>Worse!

"Did a skinless horror try to take their flesh to place on their own?"

>Worse!

"Did a fangless try to devour them?"

>Worse!

"Did a curled monster try to grasp them in their never ending tail?"

>WORSE!

"You know what just cut to what it is."

'I... am actually really worried about how many possibilities you went through there. Is everyone... are we just okay with this?'

>I don't understand this stupid stuff they keep writing on my papers!

"..."

'...what.'

>When I made up a hypothetical scenario about being approached by a stranger and what to say to them, half of the answers were BEGONE THOT. What the heck does Thot mean!?

"...I don't know. Fluttershy?"

'It's a meme.'

>What's a me mes?

'It's... complicated.'

"Fine, what does it mean?"

'I don't know.'

"..."

'...'

>...are... are we old?

"Oh dear hivemind."
>>
>>30440124
To anime, or us?

We don't really do that, in fact most fights add totally silent and don't spell out the big twist. Some people were still confused as to what happened between Sunset and chrysalis and why she needed her to use up all that love
>>
>>30437937
But there was only the one lovebomb...
>>
>SA
"Celestia"
'Luna'
~Twilight~
(Spike)
~~

>...

"..."

'...'

~...~

(...are you fucking kidding me.)

>"'~WHAT NOW!?~'"
>>
>>30440444
Chitty's fights are mostly just blows but ones like Fizzle and DT just go on and on and on. Spike and Flash literally had a talk about their place in the universe between trying to kill each other.
>>
>AUJ
"Pommel"
'Potsticker'
~~~~~

The meetup had only taken a minute, at most.

"Who what where when why!?"

The yelling would probably last longer.

It would've been impossible for either of the captains to miss her, what with their joined guard both snapping to attention and following every step. There was little question in the serious face on any of the four guards from both segments flanking both sides that they thought the mare before them was none other than the princess, the savior herself.

'And you batter have a good reason for it or I'm going to kick your ass!'

Not so much the guard captains who had been briefed on a number of visual cues to look out for.

It was mostly the scowl that set them off.

>Ah' do, but Ah' can't tell you here.

"You'd better have a good reason why or-"

She brushed past him, the unicorn left miffed but unable to do anything else beneath her considerable power.

>Ah' do. Ah' don't want to cause a panic. We've got time, maybe, but we don't have much and Ah' need to inform the others before it runs out.

Her voice, deathly serious without a hint of contempt, her body in such a ragged shape, and the visible and painful looking wound on her side were more than enough.

"Alright. But this isn't over."

>Ah'll let your leaders declassify to you whatever they wants, but they come first.

'...Twilight's lab.'

>Ah' thank you.

She needed no more clarification, and she needed no directions. With one sharp turn, she knew exactly which way to go.

"Anything we need to know now?"

That was the only thing so far to make her pause.

>...it's all mah' fault.

Just long enough to deliver the words that made their hearts stop.

>...Ah'm sorry.
>>
>>30441417
Okay now you're being a little too Martyer here AUJ...
>>
>PJ
"Daw"
~~~

>Awww, chitin bits.

"That bad?"

>No idea, just know this is bad.

"How bad?"

>Bad enough I wish half of me wasn't country fried bug.

"Least you ain't got frostbite in all the worst places."

>Everyone's keeping it under wraps, though, try not to spook anyone.

"Says the scary ass bug."

>Damn right, pirate.

"...Got your blades?"

>Nope. Got that kickass sword?

"Nope."

>...

"...go to the club room and swipe all the guns?"

>Knew I liked you.
>>
>>30441576
I like that she's not blaming everyone, but this does hint at some serious "I have the literal world on my shoulders and if I fuck up everything dies" issues. We knew she had them, Applebucking Season is still the ur example, but this is getting insane. AJ really needs to teach her the magic of friendship.
>>
>Cadence
"18"
~~~~~

>...Eighteen? Sweetie cakes?

"Yeah?"

>Is that the silent alarm from Canterlot?

"Kinda."

>...

"...Just doesn't stop around here does it?"
>>
>>30440317
>We never did the plotline of Spike defeating all the demons

Awww.
>>
>13
"007"
~~~~

>You shouldn't have come here...

The light from Canterlot's edge was just enough, the barest of glows that surrounded the changeling who had emerged from the shadows like a phantom, letting his full face be seen without obstruction.

Letting the changeling see the was it creased inwards in wrinkles of that far surpassed his age.

>You can't stop me from going.

One step forwards, that was all she took, just enough to test him and see how he'd react.

She didn't even bother to hide her annoyance when he moved in tandem with her, one step just the same.

>...I don't have time for this.

Despite her words, the clasps that connected her to the the cart carrying her scant few items came loose, allowing her to finally turn around and face him fully with eyes sharp enough to cut through his own wide pair. She weakly walked around, not bothering to hide how winded she felt even from the casual walk thus far, until she came within a scant few steps of him.

>What do you want, Seven? Did Queen Chrysalis send you? Did you move on orders from the ponies again? Who's voice are you following today, and what did they order you to do?

She watched his throat contract, easily visible to see how it closed with the thin chitin atop it.

>Did they tell you to bring me back at any cost?... Or was this your idea, to prove yourself to the Queen and her Hive, did you want to show you're still loyal and not some lapdog to the ponies? What's driving you today, little changeling?

"You don't have to go."

No matter the sincerity in his voice or the ragged breath that had let it out, she felt nothing but a fierce heat begin to well inside.

>I'm well aware of what I do and do not have to do, question is, what are you planning to do with what I choose to do?

She could see him fight it, struggle with all he had to keep it back, do his very best not to move.

And fail, when his legs shook ever so slightly.

"I..."

1/5
>>
>>30442419

The twitch of her own legs, the hunger to take off running, it burned as much in her as what lied behind her sight.

Something even hotter was deeper inside her chest.

A curiosity.

A need.

>You what.

"I..."

Something that drove her as she watched his normally rigid stance start to waver.

>You. What.

Something that ignited like a firework when he finally spoke.

"...I didn't want it to happen."

It should have brought anger, it should have brought contempt, it should have brought hate, or it should have brought at least the last lingering embers of disgust inside of her to see him as he was.

Eyes wide, mouth razor thin in a pursed line, a deep frown on his face.

>...I know.

"No, no you don't understand..."

He reached out, desperate to grab her, desperate for something.

She backed away, denying him.

"I... I just wanted to prove-"

>I know.

"I didn't want any of them to be killed-"

>I know.

"The plan was just to defeat them so I could learn-"

>I know.

"...She wasn't supposed to be there."

There was little question which 'she' the pronoun game playing changeling meant.

Even imagining the smug pony face made her blood boil.

>That... I didn't know. And I don't care.

Cold as the bitter frost, she turned away.

"Wait-"

>No. No I will not. I don't care what your intention was, I don't care that you didn't want them dead, it doesn't matter. None of it matters, not after what you did.

She turned back just enough to let him see the green magic igniting in her eyes, the fire that seemed to be all consuming and threatening to overtake her at any moment and cover her like a pyre.

>You're the one who unleashed them on her, you're the one who brought those murderers to that hive. Any of them, Queen Chrysalis, The Empire Royals, any of them would have been better, could have handled the situation better, but no... someone like Spike was easier, wasn't it?

It melted him, no matter how cold he felt.

2/4
>>
>>30442427

>Spike has a real tendency for going off and acting independent of the princesses recently, hasn't he? Against Blueblood, underground, Cordyceps, Chrysalis... he has a real notion of going on his own, and only taking a scant few allies with him, doesn't he?

She didn't need to lay a hoof on him.

He looked ready to fall over all the same without it.

>I wondered when I heard the news... why Spike? Why the A-team? My mother was someone beyond most princesses, she could easily defeat most of them alone, yet when I learned you were the one that made the call, you picked... Spike. The tiny, weak, small little thing, who's only strength is a weapon, you called him... why?

Even if he could still stand, he could not look at her a second longer.

>That's when I realized... if it was the princesses, they'd call for assistance, no? They'd call their full forces and bring everything they had to bare against her. There would be no chances taken, nothing to be left to risk... but they'd be too perfect, wouldn't they? They'd probably beat her too easily, or defeat her too perfectly. With the element of total surprise and enough forces, even she's not invincible. But then, where would you fit in? Where would you be able to join in... and get what you wanted?

He could do nothing but scowl.

>I don't know what it was, exactly, you were hungering for when you slipped in, I don't know what you wanted, or if you achieved it or not, all that mattered was that Spike had the authority to order an attack, he had the backing to get you transportation over there, he had the streak to keep it silent from the others enough it would just be you and a small group, and he had the bullheaded need to prove himself that would be so perfect for you to manipulate into letting them split up, and letting you go right towards whatever it was that was waiting. Am I close?

He didn't say a word.

That said it all.

3/5
>>
>>30442431

>...maybe I'm overthinking things, maybe you did just want to prove yourself as the greatest of the Hives forces, maybe you saw the spot Forty Two could barely hold in her weakened state and took your chance to own it for yourself and all the prestige that came with it. Maybe you didn't want anything more than to take them by surprise, take them in non-lethally, and stand above the rest and get a nice pat on your head.

She couldn't help but roll her eyes in disgust when he flinched.

>It doesn't matter. If you came to apologize, you've failed. If you came to talk me out of leaving, you've failed. If you were hoping for some sort of absolution for your crimes, you've failed. You, Changeling Zero Zero Seven...

When her hoof pointed at him, he felt the weight of a thousand higher beings staring down in utter contempt at him.

>You are the reason this all went awry. Not the killers who sought glory, not the ones who hoped to take from her, not the ones who thought they were doing the right thing and stopping a great evil, you are the one who made this happen, you are the reason my mother is dead, and I will never forgive you.

His head fell, and with it, his body and his soul.

She could see him crushed beneath that weight, she could see the first flickers of tears in his eyes, she could see his lips opening and closing in silent pleas for anything at all besides the regret of what he'd done, she could see him hit the ground in remorse, and in despair. She could see he felt nothing but the worst for his actions.

She would give him no mercy after that.

>... you are the reason the four of them in the building were inside when it came down, and nothing will ever change that.

But the finishing blow had an effect she did not see coming.

The complete and utter stop of everything, as his eyes shot open

"F... four?"

4/5
>>
>>30442440

The shame, the regret, the sadness, all of it put on hold as confused eyes swung left to right in a baffled thoughts trying to piece together that word he could not help but be hung up on.

"Wha.. what do you mean, four? There was... in the invasion, there was... Sunset, Flash Sentry, Fizzle the dragon, that was..."

She went strangely quiet when his eyes opened wide.

A memory, one he'd forced as far down as he could, reemerged.

"That name..."

One spoken by a Titan as she looked to the rubble in despair.

"...Sweet Note..."

One heard by nobody but him, as he floated in the ashes.

"I never saw... nobody ever mentioned a..."

His eyes shot to the side as he struggled to think of any, any at all, who had spoken her name, mentioned her at all, said anything else of her presence since then.

He found nothing.

"...how did you know there was four inside-"

He stopped.

Body, mind, and soul.

He was stopped by a single light from a changelings horn.

>You should have let me walk away.

In the next blink of his eyes, the world was nothing but pain.
>>
>>30442446
WELL
SHIT
13 KNOWING TOO MUCH CONFIRMED
>>
>>30442446
I totally called it!

Did not think you would use a minor detail from the fall like that but CALLED IT
>>
>>30442446
This means either she was there, or she mind raped the hell out of someone...
>>
>>30442446
>7's getting fucked up.

About time!
>>
>>30442446
OH FUCK
>>
>>30442510
It's possible she was the one Chrysalis heard back at the hive. I know that's a minor detail but fuck you know how it works by now.>>30442516
>>
>>30442446
PLACE YOUR BETS!

Mindzotzed into forgetting or full on vegetable?
>>
>>30442548
She's gonna fuck him up so it doesn't spoil the "13 knows somehow" trick.
>>
>>30442562
Leading to 42 seeing and a descent into darkness?
>>
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>>30442548
I'm taking the third option:

13 gives in to her gift, amplifying it to hitherto unseen leves
>>
>>30442653
So she turns 7 into a sleeper agent?

I LIKE IT!
>>
>>30442728
...Well, what a well crafted and easily interpreted statement!

But for all the poor layman in the audience with brains still trying to figure out the 'any key', no what?
>>
>>30442446
>...

Looks left

>...

Looks right

>....dance.

Sexy music starts playing.

>I don't even feel bad!
>>
>>30442446
>13's verbal beatdown

That makes a creepy amount of sense and actually makes 7 seem scarier than he was.
>>
>>30442921
>He didn't intend PD to get inside but he couldn't turn down the weapons
>He didn't argue splitting up even though he could have had Blossom easily scout out where everyone was, or bring along some rats or something to go much faster
>Went right to the bedroom holding the info he took so he knew where he was going
>Encouraged Spike to keep trying without ever thinking he could pull it off
>Nearly managed to down both Chitty and Sunset solo
>He almost got away with everything

Jesus fuck
>>
>>30442586
>42 VS mindcontrolled 7 rematch

I WANT IT
>>
>AJ
"Dash"
'Rarity'
~~~~

>Please tell me that isn't Fillydelphia.

"It's not."

>Thank goodness.

"It's Van Hoover."

>...

'Darling I think we need to ask for directions.'

>Alright.

"...'

'...That's it?'

>What?

"You're not going to be stubborn about this?'

>Why would Ah'?

'Not going to argue and point out how right you are?'

>But we're lost, Ah'm obviously not right.

"..."

'...'

>WHAT!?

'I'm starting to think she took a shot to the head.'

>One time!

"Okay, this makes sense now."

>Shut up!
>>
>>30440733
Whatever it is keep Spike far away from it. Also hurry up and get AJ home already so she can chew him out!
>>
>>30442753
Kinda shit, senpai

P boring too
>>
>>30443697
Well thank God you cleared that up
>>
>>30443418
It's AUJ.

How do you not know it it's AUJ telling them Chitty's still alive and(She thinks) is coming for them and hungering to smash his little changeling butthole.
>>
So when do we get the reveal that actually everyone is Alive and Well?

....Ohhhh, no, is it something we have to write ourselves?
>>
>>30444586
They might not be, depending on how he wants this to go. This is either going to be the start of something dark, or it's going to be repealed are okay and something worse will happen.
>>
>>30444586
Are they?

I mean the only reveal in the last story was that she was there. We knew that, she spent Christmas with her. This isn't any new information to us, we already know why she knew sweet note was there.
>>
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>>30444781
>Are they?
>>
>>30444781
Wait. Why is 13 knowing Sweet Note was in the tower a big deal, again? I mean, to 7? It's not like it wouldn't be much of a stretch for her to guess that Chitania's 'food source' would be in the tower, too.
>>
>>30445737
>'food source'
It's funny that you still think of her as only that... and a bit.. idk sad...? No that's not the right word but it's a negative word for sure.
>>
>>30445737
Because why would you keep your food in a place that's literally about to be filled to the brim with it, and is in an increasingly dangerous battle?
>>
Morning everyone!
>>
>>30445737
Would 7 think of her as a food source? He's only heard Chitty call her once.
>>
NC
>FS
“???”
‘???’
~~~~

>And welcome back everyone to another episode of Fantastically Fixing Friendships, Featuring Fluttershy. There may be a hiatus going on, but we’re here for now. Our next guest is a pair of familiar faces, Pinkie Pie and Diamond Tiara.

“Hey! You shot us last time!”

‘You shot her, you crushed me!’

>Sounds like we need to fix a friendship.

“HOW!?”

>Well, why did you steal my couch?

‘It’s cool.’

>And?

“That’s it, it’s a cool couch.”

>Why didn’t you buy your own?

“I’m not made of money!”

>But Diamond Tiara is rich.

“…wait, she’s right!”

‘Er, I feel like that’s not the problem-“

“It is!”

‘She shot you!’

“And she wouldn’t have done that if we hadn’t taken her couch! Which we wouldn’t have done if it wasn’t for you not ponying up the money!”

‘How is this my fault!?’

>Maybe it’s not, Cadence is rich too.

“…”

‘…Blame Cadence?’

“All her fault.”

>Is that… it?

“Sounds good.”

‘All Cadence.’

>Oh… well, I suppose that friendship is fixed, but my producers say not to mumble anything because it happened already.

“What?”

>That’s all the time we have today. As always, stay kind… and you’re welcome on my show any time while you wait for yours.

“’AWWWW!’”
>>
>>30446528
And that once was her in mourning while she's dead...
>>
>>30445807
My point is that a lot of people would know Sweet Note as 'that one pony who hangs out with Chitania' or 'that one pony Chitania calls her food source'. It's not exactly a secret that they hang out with each other.

>>30445908
Why would she not keep Sweet Note at the tower? Before Team Renegade showed up, the tower wasn't activated and there was no danger, so Sweet Note would still be serving as Chitania's 'food source' and there wouldn't be a need to send her away.

Anyways, Team Evo got jumped, so it's not like Chitania would have time to send Sweet Note away.
>>
>>30447100
>Before Team Renegade showed up, the tower wasn't activated and there was no danger, so Sweet Note wou

Yes it was. That was the blue glow chasing down the Ateam, the process had already begun, it wouldn't make any sense for her to still be there.

The more important part was that nobody ever mentioned her, I think. Silver Spoon was the only A team member to ever even see her(DT blasted the wall and buried her before she saw her), and she never said a word to anyone. The last anyone saw of Sweet Note she was being abducted, why would someone not in the know think CHITANIA would keep her around during a pivotal moment? 13 knew because she visited her, but only SS ever saw her in the battle.
>>
>Crystal Guard
“CG2”
~~~

>So it’s agreed, Shining Armor is the sexiest stallion we work with on a day to day basis ignoring brothers, fathers, grandfathers, cousins, friends of the family and guys at least five years older or younger than us.

“And also is the one we have the best chance with including all those previously excluded.”

>…

“…We sure cry a lot.”

>I think we do it to ourselves.
>>
>>30447152
>it wouldn't make any sense for her to still be there
But she was still there, which takes that out as a reasoning for why 13 can't assume Sweet Note died in the tower. But if no one outside of Team Evo is supposed to know that Sweet Note was in the tower or at least with Chitania following her abduction, then that answers the contention, I guess.
>>
>>30447281
>But she was still there,

Right, but she was in a safe room, and only there because Chitty actually likes her. But how would anyone know that? The only time they were together, Chitania regarded her as a tool and showed no interest except self preservation.

But yeah this is all moot, the thing that stuck with 007 is that she said it like she did despite no news mentioning it, and they didn't mention it because besides Silver Spoon nobody thought she was there, and TraumaFilly ain't doing any interviews in the ear future. That aside, you also have to remember that despite this, only Chitty said four names in front of 7, meaning she was important despite it not being obvious. 7 might not even have thought she was there, but that's a serious red flag that she was in contact with Chitty.
>>
>>30447311
Its also possible that Seven just, you know, didn't realize there were four because he was in a pretty deep state of shock when he learned it and it might not have clicked, and 13 just flipped her shit.
>>
OOCO
>SA
“AJ”
~~~

>I wish to know the secrets of this.

“Iffin’ ya’ don’t let go of mah’ rear in two seconds yer’ gonna learn the secrets of orbital bone recovery surgery.”

>How deep does this go!?

“Alright, now Ah’ know this is gonna turn out to be somethin’ else, but ya’ have ta’ know what this sounds like, right? Ya’ have ta’ know, and yer’ doin’ it anyway. Is it really getting the point across the way you want it to?”

>Let me look closer.

“Honestly the only reason Ah’ ain’t bucked yer’ head flip turned round backwards is that frankly? You bein’ able to lift mah’ rear like that is kinda impressive, most guards took one look at carryin’ me and asked for hazard pay, but you’ve been workin’ out Ah’ guess! Ah’ appreciate when stallions work out and don’t go all limp hooven like those folks who look like beanpoles.”

>SWEET CELESTIA!

“Ah’ was complimentin’ you.”

>The cutie mark goes through the fur!

“…what.”

DROP!

“Look!”

>Shinin’, you best get that rear outta mah’ face unless you want me ta’ kick it so hard ya’ taste yer’ own tail-“

“Just look!”

>…Huh, what do ya’ know, it does.

“Should we tell someone about this?”

>…lemme look for a bit longer.

“I would argue that, but you are really strong and I don’t think my front legs are going to cut it.”

>Uh huh.

“You take your time.”

>Ah’ll do that.
>>
>>30447428
OOCO
>AJ
“Twilight’
~~~

>Twilight? Ah’ was lookin’ at yer’ brothers flanks, and-

“I can see why, they’re very nice flanks.”

>…

“…”

>…Dang it, Ah’m out.

“Wait, if that’s not why, then why were you looking at them?”

>Nope.

“Applejack! You explain why-“

>How am Ah’ the one who needs to explain somethin’ here!?
>>
>>30447499
Saw it coming. Still perfect.
>>
OOCO
>18
“42”
~Chrysalis~
(Cadence)
~~~~

>Alright, since we’re all here… let’s discuss the flanks.

“Fine, but I do this under duress.”

~HAH! I love talking about mine!~

>No, not ours… his.

“…oh. Well, this got a lot more weird.”

~Sissy!... But she’s right, it is weird.~

>Or is it? Is it normal and we’re weird for thinking it? I mean, we are changelings.

“Our standards might not be up to par with this one and we cannot objectively judge it.”

~I still think it looks weird.~

>I mean, are we being insensitive?

“It doesn’t look sensitive.”

~WHOA!~

“Not that I would know.”

>We might need to ask Twilight about this one.

~Now THAT would be weird!~

>Well, what else are we going to do?

(Hey girls, we talking about Spike’s ass?)

>What is up with it!?

(I’m told it’s normal for a dragon, if a bit plump.)

~HAH!~

“Glad we cleared that up.”

>…

“…”

‘…’

(…you all feel dirty?)

>”’Little bit.”’
>>
>Celestia
“Twilight”
‘SA’
~Luna~
~~~~

>Alright, taking bets here.

“Celestia!”

>At this point I’m just trying to guess it. What do you think it is? Zombies? Have we done zombies?

‘Mushroom kind.’

“Shiny, don’t encourage her!”

~A dragon, perhaps?~

“Luna no!”

>A dragon would be new.

~Didn’t Spike shoot one to death some time ago?~

“What!?”

‘WHAT!?’

>He did that… wow, come to think of it, we really should have investigated that more.

‘I’d say so!’

“How could you just ignore that!”

~We weren’t sure if it was serious for the longest time, it seemed… weird.~

>Very, but it certainly happened.

~Certainly.~

“I can’t believe you! This is indicative of a huge unaddressed problem! We should deal with this!”

>…little late to the party-

“It’s all your fault!”

‘…’

~…~

>…it hurts.
>>
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Apple... Apples... AUpple... Ap'Pal... Appa'el... Hmmmm... Apples... PEAR!? Apple... Yeah... Apples.
>>
>Zephyr
"Vermillion"
~~~~

>... and, all things considered, I understand where he was coming from, at least.

"I appreciate your understanding, King Zephyr. The Sergeant and I will have a discussion about this incident once he returns."

>I'll leave you to that, then. But, about this alert you mentioned: what exactly is the issue now?

"I'm unaware of the specifics, but I believe it's best for you to stay inside the castle until things settle down again."

>Mmm. Do I have to stay in the dining room?

"Well, no, Your Majesty. Unless the Princesses have stated otherwise, you have, to my general knowledge regarding dignitary powers, free reign of the castle. Though, and begging your pardon for my saying so, it'd be appreciated if you refrained from entering areas or doing things someone of lesser stature would be charged for."

>Mmm.

"Ah, and here we are. If there's nothing further you need from me, Your Majesty, I believe it's best that I return to my post as per the alert protocols."

>I think I'll manage. Don't let me keep you.

"As you wish."

She bows and turns to leave.

>Ah, but there is one thing...

"Yes, Your Majesty?"

>You lot... aren't going to forget about me again, are you?

"I... No?"

>Oh. It's just that, well... I'm kind of eager about negotiating and all.

"..."

>...

"I promise. I will return as soon as the alert calms down."

>Very good. Thank you.
>>
>>30448184
>InB4 they forget him again
>>
>>30447264
Hey, Caddy would probably kill for SOME stallion action in there.
>>
>>30448140
NC
>AJ
"Mac"
~~~~

>AH'M HALF PEAR!?

"Eeeeyyyup."

>Huh... does that mean iffin' Ah' have any kids, Ah' should name at least one of them a not-apple kind?

"..."

>Ah' know, it sounds crazy, but think of the kids mac.
>>
>>30448184
>Guard
"Guard 2"
~~~

>That bird has the patience of a saint.

"Seriously."

>Like, this is damned insane.

"Right!?"

>How the fuck is he not crazy?

"That's a good question. Maybe he's like, royalty, and it's more than just who has the most bits over there?"

>...

"...I feel bad."

>Little bit.
>>
>Chrysalis
~~~

Her eyes were cold.

Thin little slits that let precious little light flow through them as she glared, tiny little curves of her lips just barely enough to let her glimmering fang shine through.

She didn't know exactly why the warning had been sounded, the changeling who had brought her that information knew as little as she did, yet she felt she knew all she needed to know.

With nothing to be seen from the one she'd sent to tail Forty Two and nothing to be heard of any sign of the loose little changeling on the run, she felt she knew all she needed to.

>So...

With thin little eyes, and a thin little curve of her lip, she spoke.

>It's like that, is it?

None were around her to hear her words.

Her hive knew of her intent all the same. They could feel it in the air, in their minds.

The Queen had made a decree, and all would guard the other, defend the Hive, protect those she wished protecting. They would do it, in her stead.

>...Very well.

For she had other matters to attend to.

>I'll handle it myself.

Matters she would rush to, in a single bout of flame.
>>
>>30449576
>I wanted a HAPPY PONY MEAL! And you gave me a SMALL ADULT PONY MEAL! EXPLAIN YOURSELVES BEFORE I WIPE YOUR MEASLY BODY OFF OF THIS PLANE OF REALITY!

"M-ma'am please, i-it's company policy"

>FUCK YOUR COMPANY POLICY
>>
>>30449665
Ha!
>>
>>30449665
>I wanted the Applejack doll!

"...miss?"

>Damn it!
>>
>>30449576
No yeah that'll make it better.
>>
>Spike
"Twilight"
(Celestia)
{Luna}
~SA~
~~~~

>So can I help-

"No."

>I mean I can-

(No.)

>Maybe just to look-

{No.}

>Can I at least watch-

~NO.~

>...Are you going to keep doing this forever?

"({~YES.~)}"

>You know it would've been faster to just shoot me in the face.
>>
>>30449576
FWOOSH

>I just realized that I have no idea where she went or what directions she used. This... this is going to take some time.... WHEEEE!

FWOOOSHFWOOSHFWOOSH

>I'M BEST QUEEN!
>>
>AJ
"Rarity"
'Dash'
~???~
~~

>We ain't lost.

"Fine, we're totally on track, and just so happened to be aiming for a desert. This was all obviously intended from the start!"

'I'm just happy you guys are talking again.'

>Ah'm tellin' her, we ain't talking.

"How dare you!"

'And hope crushed.'

>Ah'm not tryin' to start a fight-

"That much is obvious! Especially not when it could potentially save the world!"

>Potentially!

'Reallllyyyy didn't have the effect you intended.'

>Ah' mean that she could'a just as easily punched mah' guts out, but this way at least worked for now!

'Applejack, when you strike out, stop swinging.'

>Ah'm not striking out!

"Except in directions."

>WE'RE NOT LOST!

~Princess!?~

>See!? Bat-mom! We know where we are-

~What are you doing in Appleoosa!?~

'..'

"..."

>...Appleoosa. We're in Appleoosa.

"..."

'..."

>...well we ain't lost.
>>
>>30450760
NC
ELSEWHERE!
(Chitania)
~~~~

(I am so fucking lost.)
>>
>>30448184
Boy, this guy has had a rough day.

Wants to talk but then a city gets eaten and now everyone's on high alert.
>>
>>30447428
>the white booty..
> the Legends were true
>>
>>30450596
...that was way cuter than it had any right to be
>>
Night threads
>>
>>30452567
Night Spool
>>
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>Meanwhile, beneath Hoofington...
>>
>>30453167
What is this implying?
>>
>>30453469
Faustmom is sexy!
>>
>>30453469
Momrape
>>
>>30451562
White booty is always top tier.

It's the purple ones that are meh.
>>
>>30453167
This is actually a plus since she's back to being human...
>>
>>30451361
>Zephryious
“Guard”
~~~~

>This has been a rather awful day.

“Right!? First I learn that there’s a massive battle going on that everyone just missed, my cousin in Hoofington gets eaten by a light monster and might or not be dead, the A-team comes back more chunks of meat than warriors, then the princess vanishes, then I have to watch over major surgery, then I have to watch over the other princesses vanishing to a flame monster for hours and worrying everyone, and now there’s yet another completely vague alert warning us of who even knows what! I don’t even know what this gun is going to do or if I’m just one of those idiots shooting the monster to clearly no effect before getting smashed, or if this is just someone with a bad stomachache who hit the wrong button! This day is the worst!”

>…

“…”

>…I’ve mostly sat down a whole lot and my bum is sore.

“I’m sorry for your pain.”
>>
>>30453167
...FUCKING CARNIFEEEEEEEX!!!
>>
OOCO
>Chrysalis
"Changelings'
~~~

>MY SUBJECTS! Today, we're declaring our seperation day!

"...what?"

>We're self determining now.

"Huh!?"

>We're our own sovereign nation.

"What!?"

>We're declaring our autonomous nature in the grand scheme of things.

"HUH!?"

>We're... damn it, what's the word? Self-sufficient, self-supporting, self-reliant, self-governing, self-ruling, self-determining, nonaligned?

"...WHAT!?"

>Free, damn it!

"WE'RE FREEEEE!"

"NO MORE QUEENS! NO MORE GODS!"

>No no! Still a queen! I still rule you... and our gods still exist I guess, we scientifically and veritably proved that. But we're not dependent on anyone else!

".."

"..."

"......"

"........So it's the same but we have our own building now."

>I'll let you set of fireworks to celebrate.

"WOOOOOOO!"

"LET FREEDOM RING!"

>We should make a day out of this.
>>
NC
>Spoiled Rich
"Ponyville"
~~~~

>MY FELLOW CITIZENS! The Mayor has fallen, the princess has fled, our rulers have abandoned us! It's time to throw off the shackles of the oligarchs and become our own rulers! They try to rule us from across the plain, and I say no more! NO MORE! We shall rule ourselves! We shall govern ourselves! LET US BECOME A PONYVILLE FOR ALL!

"Is this just so you can get a movie deal?"

>...n-no?

"..."

>...I already made the costume.

"Can the costume raise the sun?"

>...It might.
>>
>>30454626
Guess it's independence day stories?

I'm down!
>>
NC
>Cadence
"SA"
~~~

>So the Crystal Empire is independent from Equestria, right?

"I think so."

>...so do we have our own currency or-

"Nobody put any thought into the economics of a fictional toyset."

>Fair enough.
>>
NC
>AJ
"Twilight"
~~~~

>Fillydelphia, VanHoover, Coltsburg and Manehatten all just declared their independence.

"WHY!?"

>Said iffin' we're not gonna stop them from getting flattened by a dang supermonster and or a crazy ass mare with a mech fetish then they're not paying taxes.

"...you know what that's totally fair."
>>
>>30454939
>Those states immediately collapsed
>Because FUCKING DRAGONS and other giant monsters continued to exist.
>>
NC
>Chitania
~~~~~

>MY LOYAL SUBJECTS! Today, we celebrate! OUR INDEPENDENCE DAY!

...

>...Get it?

...

>...G-get it?
>>
>>30455110
YOU
BASTARD
>>
>>30455110
This is several kinds of fucked man... like wow.
>>
NC
>AB
"AJ
~~

>Today, Ah'm celebratin' a year of being independent from you!

"And you've almost died how many times now?"

>...S-shut up.
>>
NC
>AUTwilight
"AUCelestia"
~~~~

>Now let's all gather round and celebrate our independence... from Applejack!

"Wooooo!"

>We're freee!

"Freeeee!'

>No more Jerkjack!

"No more jerkjack!"

>"Wooooo!"
>>
NC
>56
"SS"
~~~

>Seein' as everyone else is just up an' gettin' away from things, let me just say that I, changeling Five-Six, am officially demoralizin'--

"Declaring."

>--my independence from all plot, far and wide, of all shapes and sizes!

"Wow. I mean, I don't buy that for a second but wow, kudos for managing to get the words out."

>Hurtful! Why the lack of faith, Spoons?

"Hm? Could you repeat that? Hard to hear with your face rammed against my left flank like that."

>...Point.

"And match."
>>
NC
>Sunset
"Flash"
'Fizzle'
(SN)
~???~
~~~~

>Alright, all in favor of declaring independence?

"Me!"

'Me!'

(I'm in!)

>Alright, you heard them! We've officially declared our independence! Soooo-

~ALL SHALL BE WHOLE!~

>I don't think it's taking us seriously.
>>
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>>30455987
...this thing is making me fear that the tiny hopespot Chitty had during the end of the 200th thread will turn out to be a MAKE US WHOLE AGAIN scenario in the near future...
>>
>>30456041
NC
>Chitania
~???~
~~~~

>...

~WE WILL BE UNITED AGAIN!~

>...

*Pops neck*

>Well, I said I wanted to fight gods...
>>
>>30456041
>will turn out to be a MAKE US WHOLE AGAIN

"Ah. I see what you were missing... MY PUNCHES! AAAAATATATATATATATATATATAT!"
>>
NC
>Pinkie
"AJ"
'Twilight'
~Dash~
(Rarity)
{Fluttershy}
~~~~

>You ready for the fireworks!?

"Sure... but why are we doin this again?"

>Because fireworks.

"We ain't got more of a reason?"

>Fine we're celebrating.

"Celebratin' what?"

'Oh oh! This is the anniversary of the first day of drafting the first piece of legislature in the fourteenth commonhouse of Starswirl the Bearded for review!'

>There we go. We're celebrating that.

~I'm cool so long as I get to blow stuff up.~

>That's the whole point of fireworks, silly!

~...I have no counter to that.~

(Well, so long as you don't get any soot on me.)

>Oh, Rarity! So focused on your appearance!

(More the fact that if I get soot on me, we're close enough to the blast any of us could be set on fire and severely burned.)

>...So vain!

{I'm just going to sit behind Twilight.}

'Why me!?'

{Magic shield.}

'Oh, right...'

>Alright, are you all ready!?

"Wait what? We just got here."

'I haven't even set the basket down yet.'

>Three!

~Here we go...~

>Two!

(Pinkie no! Let us get clear!)

>ONE!

{Oh dear.}

>ANNNNDD-

"'({OH SHI-})'"

Pop!

"..."

'...'

~...~

(...)

{... a party popper, really?}

"Oh, that Pinkie Pie!"

"'({~AHAHAHAHHAHAA!~)}'"

>Why the heck are you all still standing there!? The fuse is lit!

"'({~...Aw fu-~})'"

>Happy fourth everyone.

BOOOOOOMM!
>>
>>30455987
"Quick, put it in writing! Who has paper?"

>...
'...'
(...)

"We'll work on the paper thing."
>>
HAPPY 4TH ALL MY /PA/LS!

Unless you're not an American in which case go ahead and blow something up to celebrate our lord and pony savior, Applehorse.

If you want to say "Well massive explosions is not how Applejack would want to celebrate!" I remind you how she got rid of an old shed. Pony loves her some boom.
>>
>>30456794
>...blow it all up.

"Er, aren't I supposed to be a war criminal?"

>BLOW IT UP CHITTY!
>>
>>30456794
Cheers mate.
>>
>>30455110
>Arana
~~~

>Can I join?... Please?
>>
Whwlp, hope you all had a happy 4th, and managed not to blow many fingers off!
>>
>>30457831
>and that is the last day heard of any writer.
>>
Canada Applefag says: Get up you cows
>>
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>>30458607
>>30458607
>>
>>30458607
>not 'moove it

ONE
JOB
>>
>>30458607
We Americans are still blind from shooting up bright lights in our eyes.

For FREEDOM
>>
>>30456041
>Chitty
>Hope

Did you not see the problem before?
>>
OOCO
>SA
“AJ”
~~~~

>…

“…What… is that.”

>…

“…Ah’ said… what… is that?”

>…P-pear?

“IT’S A PEAR!”

>Yeah? Vanhoover’s finest.

“You know Mah’ family and the pears are bitter rivals!”

>Are you?

“Yes!”

>Why? Don’t you guys live in like, totally different towns?

“There’s a simple explanation for that.’

>…

“…”

>..well? What-

SLAP!

>MY TOOTH!

“That better be the last time Ah’ catch a pear in that mouth, iffin’ it’s not an apple in there next time, Ah’ll make ya’ drink it through a straw!”

>…Pear smoothie actually sounds pretty nice right about now-

SLAP!

>I didn’t even drink it!

“Begone with yer’ demon thoughts!”

>Fine, you know what? Fine, I don’t even… whats that?

“What’s what?”

>That button. Right there.

“Oh, that? Ah’ just went to see a Coltsburg game earlier today.”

>…

SLAP!

>You stain this home with the rivals of the Canterlot Caprioles! STAINED IT!

“Ah’m sorry!”

SLAP!

>TAKE IT OFF!

“Fine! Fine! Jeeze, ah’ don’t even like the dang sport.”

>…

“…Ya’ think we got problems?”

>We manage them pretty well.
>>
>Dash
“AJ”
‘Rarity’
~~~~

>We’re almost home now.

“…”

‘…’

>Noooo more excuses.

“…”

‘…’

>We’re right this time, firedude made sure we were going in the right direction, and I trust a guy who wanted to show us his gas can collection pretty well.

“…”

‘…’

>So if we were ever going to, say, do something, now would be the time we do the thing.

“…”

‘…’

>Thiiiing we can do.

“…”

‘…’

>Iiiit’s here, the thing.

“…”

‘…’

>…Nothing? We’re just doing this as we are?

“…”

‘…’

>…I’m the element of loyalty, so be generous and be honest already!

“Ah’m bein’ honest about how little Ah’ have to say.”

‘And I’m generously giving pity by not dragging her further through the mud.’

>…Good talk everyone.
>>
>>30460195
Bit of a non-starter there...
>>
>>30460268
Didn't quite make the connection I tried, no. But at least I tried.
>>
>>30460369
Trying is the first step to winning! Keep believing!
>>
>>30459923
Mutually Abusive relation ship... it works... huh. You know it said that two warriors fighting one another creates a bond and understanding of one another deeper than the sea... is this the key too a long and loving relationship? Beat eachother till you know eachother like no other?
>>
>>30460195
NC
>Chrysalis
“AJ”
‘Rarity’
~Dash~
~~~~~

FWOOSH!

>Damn… hey AJ!

“Hey.”

‘Well, don’t say hi to us or anything!’

>I won’t! What’s up my orange homie?

“Don’t talk like that, it makes me want to tell ya’ ta’ pull up yer’ pants, and ya’ ain’t even wearing pants!”

>I dropped them for Shiny already. HAH!

~So he had something to walk over the puddle you left?~

‘Oh my!’

>I do not deny I am a thirsty bitch, I love that about myself.

“Iffin’ ya’ find something you don’t love about yourself, please tell us.”

>What do I look like, a geologist? I don’t dig that deep! HAH!

‘I’m rather annoyed.’

“She’s got a charm ta her.”

~I think they call it an unluky changelings hoof.~

>Whoa! Over the line! Mainming a changeling is over the line!

~So that’s why Shiny runs away when you tell him to ‘destroy you’, isn’t it?~

>…that’s good, I’m keeping that, and I’m keeping you.

“How’d you do that anyway?”

>What?

“Find us, we’re in the desert.”

>I didn’t.

“…come again?”

>Nah, I can’t teleport across fucking continents, what the hell is wrong with you?

FWOOSH!

“…”

‘…’

~…what just happened.~
>>
>>30460468
This message brought to you by the Not42totallynotheritcouldbeanyoneshuyup foundation
>>
>Crystal Guard
“CG2”
~~~

>I’d totally do Eighteen.

“Oh, in a heartbeat. Chrysalis too.”

>Would split the darkness in half like a bad anime. Don’t even get me started on spitfire.

“She’d be swallowfire by the time I was done with her.”

>SparkleYEAH.

“Not Twilight Sparkle though.”

>Oh, I’d do her too.

“No, I mean not… you know.”

>Oh, yeah. That as a phrase needs revision.

“We’ll workshop it.”

>We’ve got plenty of time, not like we’re seeing those guys.

“…”

>…Why do we hurt ourselves.
>>
>>30460532
NC
>Chitty
"Pony"
~~~

>...Huh.

PUNCH!

"MY RIBS!"

>Do you feel more connected to me yet?

"I TASTE BONE!"

>Try punching me back, maybe that'll help.

"AHHHH!"

>Take your time.
>>
>Celestia
“AUJ”
~~~~

Finding her hadn’t taken long at all for the group. If not for the scores of guards surrounding her and moving as discreetly as they could, even if not for the obvious attention and gathering that followed her wherever she would go, even if not for the obvious unmistakable look that could only belong to a grand total of two ponies on the entire planet, they would have found her.

The sense of unease, the worrying energy dancing around her body, all of it would have drawn them like a moth to flame no matter where they had come from.

The trio of Royal Sisters and the studious new Princess waited when she arrived, and for the first time since the alarm had been silently sounded, they worried.

They did not know what would make the brash, angry and stubborn beast of a mare bow her head with seemingly sincere frown, but whatever it was spoke of nothing but ill news and terrible things to come.

>What happened?

A part of them, small though it was, knew what was coming before the first sad breath escaped her. Some tiny corner of their brain knew what it meant when side eyes cut to the side behind broken glasses, and a shaking hoof reached up to a sickening bruise and a terribly marred patch of skin. The shape, the size, it all spoke of one possibility, one they had hoped and prayed would be proven to be nothing but a stray worried thought. A part of them knew what the truth was before the honest mare ever spoke.

“…she’s still alive.”

It nearly floored them all the same.

>How… how could she…

For the very first time since they’d ever known her, the first time they’d ever even wondered if she was capable of it, the Applejack from another world looked back to the eldest princess with true remorse on her face.

“It’s all mah’ fault.”

Her story had begun.
>>
>>30461034
>Three
I guess Shiny's like 'I don't want to make this awkward or anything.
>>
>>30461119
Or they needed everyone important and someone needed to watch Spike.
>>
>SA
"Spike"
~~~~

>Sooo, looks like I'm on watch duty. I guess you could say I'm... guarding you?

The dragon on the bed never stopped staring with the same utterly dead expression.

>It's what I used to do. I was a guard.

The seconds ticking away turned to minutes, and likely would have turned to hours if not broken by a sudden loud clearing of the throat.

>AHEM. So how are you feeling?

"Stabbed."

>What's that like?

"Come a little closer and you'll find out."

Throwing all logic, sanity and reasoning to the wind, the stallion stepped forwards.

"...You don't have to be a dick about it."

>And you don't have to go on covert bombing sprees. See that? We're learning, you and me.

"I didn't bomb anything."

>Fine, covert shooting spree? Going to tell me you didn't shoot either?

Shining had no idea what the middle finger suddenly raised meant, but it brought forth a primal feeling of wanting to wash the drakes mouth out with soap.

>That's what I thought.

The dragon huffed and looked away, starting to cross his arms before realizing the issue of such an act quickly and deciding against it.

"Don't act like you wouldn't have done the same."

The expected response, mostly a loud denial, some hurt words, maybe the stallion breaking loose and going off into a long speech of the sanctity of life and the duty of a protector to defend all friends and foe, never came. For a second, Spike had honestly thought the pony had just walked away.

>I wouldn't have.

He hadn't, and he had suddenly found a great deal of interest in the floor.

>I... I would've just, well, not that. Obviously. Not to say you were the worst for doing what you did, but you shouldn't have! We can't just go around deciding who lives and who dies even if-..

The sudden stop was eerily similar to the way the dragon's own heart did the same.

1/3
>>
>>30461324

>...look, it's more... it's a lot different, I'm sure Twilight and Celestia and the others wouldn't have either, right? I mean even Chrysalis-not to say she's a monster or worse or anything and would be different, but as an example she wouldn't have, you know. It's more about-I mean I personally wouldn't have deliberately tried to shoot them or anything, I- look it's different, I'd give them a chance, that's what is important, giving them a chance before... I wouldn't...

He just kept going, masking his stuttering and slipping to new thoughts every other second as he waved his hoof about, his face remaining perfectly normal and calm even when he jerked from one word to another. If someone had only seen him and not heard a single word, they would think he was perfectly normal.

>Not like... that.

Spike heard it.

"Shining... what would you have done?"

He saw it too when the prince's face suddenly let an emotion slip.

>...You shouldn't have escalated it like that.

"Would you, if you were in the same spot? I... I only had one shot, I only had a second, if I didn't take it... would you have?"

And he saw it when the prince looked away and pointed his eyes up to the ceiling.

>I...

"It was the only way to make it just... stop. Wouldn't you have done the same, just so we could be... free?"

>...It wasn't what a prince, or a guard, or a hero would do. It's what a monster would do.

That was enough for the dragon.

>...But that doesn't-

Not enough for the prince that saw tears spring to his eyes.

>Spike-

"I know."

>Spike I didn't mean it like that-

"I know. It's fine."

>It's not-

The dragon painfully shifted away when the pony reached for him.

"It's fine, I know you don't think I'm..."

>I don't, you're not. You're... you're not, okay? You're my little bro, and I'd never think of you like that.

The words didn't seem to stick.

>Spike..

2/3
>>
>>30461333

"You should be with them... doing the important stuff. I'm not moving anytime soon, you can leave."

>Spike, stop.

"...I'm tired.'

>Spike-

The dragon shifted again, bringing the blanket over his full body and tucking himself in as careful as he could without disturbing the sheets.

"I'm... I'm feeling really tired."

>...Alright.

Defeated, the stallion took a seat next to him.

"You don't have to be here.

>...I'm not going anywhere.

Neither spoke after that, content to sit in silence.

"I'm sorry I asked if you'd do that. I know... you're better than that. I know you're a real hero, someone who can actually protect them. I know you're better..."

One of them for reasons more to do with the sudden constricting of his throat.

"...I'm sorry."

The hoof that reached up brought very little comfort.

>...me too.

It was all he could give, while they waited for the others to return.
>>
>>30461338
DAMN SHINY
>>
>>30461338
Shining the fuck
>>
>>30461338
Freak out the side, I'm glad we readdressed this part of his character, but wow is that cold.
>>
>>30461338
And Spike commits suicide. It was bound to happen.

Joking aside, I actually liked the subtle way you slipped in Shiny's problem and the fact he would try to hide he WAS relieved when it was all over, this is a great moment of him lying to cover up his own inadequacies and fear of being found out and instead of helping to heal Spike, hurt it. He's not a monster or a bad guy, just someone trying to make it clear this isn't okay even though he personally thinks it is. Good job.
>>
>>30461338
>Shining tries to be brotherly and helpful
>Ends up hitting him harder than Twilight and Celestia combined

You can't make this shit up!
>>
>>30461456
...er...
>>
>>30461338
NC
>Twilight
"Celetia"
'AUJ'
~~

>You think we should have left Spike alone with Shining like that?

"Twilight it's Shining, what is the worst thing that could possibly happen?"

>Eh, got a point, he's pretty much a copy paste of a storybook prince, if anything he's going to make Spike feel way better about himself.

'Can we focus on mah' guts gettin' punched out?'

>We're talking about my BBBFF.

'..proceed.'
>>
>>30461034
NC
>REALLY!? SHE'S SERIOUSLY STILL ALIVE!? What's it going to take to kill her?!

~Well, I have been working on this oxygen destroyer-~

>DO IT!

~~~~~LATER!~~~~~

~Okay, so the oxygen destroyer has created a more powerful, bigger, more deadly monster.~

>...

~It's all your fault-~

>I KNOW!
>>
>Cadence
"18"
~~

>I swear to Faust if this is something else around here, I'm just going to break down and maul the first pony I see.

"Cadence!"

>Mauling them, Eighteen! I will maul them with my pony teeth!

"You don't mean that."

>I will discover what pony tastes like!

"According to Chrysalis, it's sort of tangy with a metallic flavor and a hint of a sharp ammonia."

>...

"Don't want to stab anyone anymore at least?"

>...

"I could check for you if you want a second opinion."

>...

"I'll go in the corner."

>You do that.
>>
>>30461828
>Chrysalis will never live down the one time she slept with Shiny
>Because she'll never let it down
>>
>>30461694
>It's Chitty, but she has spikes

Yep.
>>
>>30461338
I feel terrible but this makes me way more hyped for AJ VS Shiny than Spike.
>>
>>30460501
I kinda wish this was canon.
>>
>>30462068
She's Destroyah, not Doomsday.
>>
>>30461916
It's literally her sexual pinnacle.
>>
>>30462443
I could go for a Doomsday Chitania. Huge, spikes coming out of every part.

SCHMOE! Make a Doomsday Chitty!
>>
>>30462512
"My sexual high was drugged rape"

Wow

Such a brilliant ruler
>>
>>30462552
>Guard guy is a milfhunter

...well, Gwen is going to have a bit of a moment.
>>
>>30462572
I uh

I think that's the joke
>>
>>30462575
>I was literally sitting on a Cougar Hunter for the better part of the day while occasionally tormenting him with sexual innuendo... you know this is all my fault but I still feel bad.
>>
>>30462572
>Such a brilliant ruler

Well I mean she actually was pretty smart for 90% of that, I mean you've got to do a lot to pull that off.
>>
>>30462572
>Doing that to a head of state and eventually being the close confidant of said head of state and multiple others
>Not brilliant

Nigga yo game is weak
>>
>>30462739
The most game she can ever score is watching Shining and Cadence go at it like absolute hounds

Chrysalis is in the corner
Shining Armour and Cadence are on the bed
Shining Armour and Cadence are laughing
Chrysalis is weeping
>>
>>30462771
She could score mad game with literal scores of other stallions worldwide, you think they wouldn't line up to get it with a superpowerful exotic queen?

She's just never gettin' none cause she won't be like "You know I could probably do better than a whitey."

Cause she can't.
>>
>>30462771
>Shining
>Cadence
>Having sex outside of producing abominations

New to the series?
>>
>>30462111
Trips confirm. Aj and Spike is going to be a beat down, but her and Shining is going to be an all-out War.
>>
>>30462876
>Implying endgame isn't Cadence getting over her inhibitions so that she and her hubby can be a one-couple Hapsburg factory
>>
>>30462771
>Shining Armour and Cadence are laughing

Anon I see why your perception would be skewed, but it's not normal for people to do that in the middle of having sex.
>>
>>30463383
They're laughing AT her, not for her
>>
>>30463542
what they should be doing is focusing
>>
>>30462707
>Well I mean she actually was pretty smart for 90% of that, I mean you've got to do a lot to pull that off.

Honestly, it's Shiny's initial... incompetence... wow it's canon... Anyway, his initial incompetence that made him forget about inviting Twilight until the last minute that made her the unexpected factor. I'm sure that if she had known about Twilight and the relationship that Caddy and Twilight share, she might have been able to pull it off.
>>
>>30464289
To be fair, Shining sent the note to have them prepare the wedding, so it's not like she shouldn't have made a plan.
>>
Can we FINALLY post!?
>>
>>30464902
yes
>>
>>30461338
NC
>SA
“Spike’
~~~~

>…

“…”

>…Well this got super awkward.

“Little bit.”

>…You still a virgin?

“WHAT!?”

>Look dude, we’re down the rabbit hole! We’re out in the middle of the field of awkwardness on the cliff of discomfort, let’s just dive right into this shit!

“I don’t want to talk about my sexual life!”

>That you have?

“DUDE!”

>Off the cliff, Spike! Make a splash!

“I’m not going to do that with you, I don’t care how good you look!”

>…

“…Not what you meant?”

>I was going for a metaphor.

“Ah.”

>…

“…please toss me out the window.”

>We don’t have one.

“Ah. Then please leave.”

>I don’t want to, AU is out there and it’ll be super awkward.

“…”

>…

“…Give me my gun.”
>>
>>30465008
> implying that he isn't going to die a virgin
>>
>Lucky Strikes
“Haymaker”
‘Steam Gauge’
~~~

>AT ATTENTION! Everyone up and ready!

“HUP!”

‘READY!’

>Soldier! Where is your partner?!

‘Still in the mareibbian sir! Probably getting a tan and other stuff!’

>Not him, your peacetrotter!

‘Oh…’

“Oh?”

>OH!?

‘Uh… I broke the charging cable.’

>What!?

‘The little… look, it bends in a weird angle, and I think I put it in wrong, so-‘

>For how long!?

‘…when did we have to break up the Hatfield thing at the statdium?’

>FOUR MONTHS!?

‘Is that bad? Do they get worse if you don’t charge them?’

>You could have requested a replacement by now!

‘Ehhhhh, I really didn’t want to, would look kind of bad…’

“Dude, seriously?”

‘Well, where’s yours?’

“…I got a peacetrotter?’

>WHAT!?

“When? I don’t remember… wait, was it that huge ass box? You guys just shipped it to my apartment?’

>YES!

“I sent it back. I wasn’t signing for that.”

>ARE YOU SERIOUS!?

‘Ha! See?’

>That’s not the same as leaving it broken for months!

‘Yeah well… shut up.’

“Waiiit, where’s yours?”

>…

‘Well?’

>…cleaning my house.

“Oh come on!”

>It’s official work!

“How do we all suck at robots so hard.”
>>
>>30464719
But you need to understand, it was SHINY that sent the note, incompetent canon Shiny whose only means of attack is to throw his wife at it... yikes... anyway he probably didn't even tell Caddy-lis about Twilight coming over. Honestly I wouldn't be surprised if he forgot to get ponies to prepare the wedding and thought to himself

"Fuck, what am I going to do!? Twily wouldn't have forgotten this... She'd have made a list..."

One hour later

"...Damn... what am I going to do... I don't have anything planned... Twily would know how to organize this mess..."

Two hours more...

"OH! OOOOOOH! This cheese cake is amazing... Ohm nom~!"

Five Hours after that...

"Weeeew that race was fun... I came last but it was still- HEY, WAIT A MINUTE!"
>>
>>30465300
To be fair, this was after weeks if not months if

"Honey? I noticed you went off at the cook kind of loudly-"

~ZOTZ!~

"Was yelling at Celestia really needed-"

~ZOTZ~

"Honey? For the flower order, you put down posies. Aren't you deathly allergic to-"

~ZOTZ~

"So who are you going to have for bridesmaids?... them in the picture? Twili's friends? Do you even know-"

~ZOTZZZZZZ!~

"The wedding is three days away!? How did I lose so much time!?"

~...eh, one more for luck. ZOTZ!~
>>
>>30465376

Chrysalis wouldn't have given herself away to Celly, and I'm pretty sure the bridesmaids thing was an asspull too get them on her good 'side' when they suddenly showed up. While you can say it was mindzoting all you want, I'm chalking it up to Shiny being an utter failure back then.

Chrysalis had victory in her sights if not for the purple strumpet.
>>
>>30465414
>Chrysalis wouldn't have given herself away to Celly,

... but she did. She acted like a total twat while Celestia was nearby several times. That happened.

>While you can say it was mindzoting all you want

I mean we saw her do it when he questioned her and he said his 'headaches' were getting really frequent.

> I'm chalking it up to Shiny being an utter failure back then.

Fair enough, I mostly just find the idea she zotzed him whenever he did pretty much anything hilarious.
>>
>>30465433
>... but she did. She acted like a total twat while Celestia was nearby several times. That happened.

And Celly... didn't do shit cause mares rage at weddings some times. Being a Twat to the help is not grounds for "CADDY IS SPY!"

>I mean we saw her do it when he questioned her and he said his 'headaches' were getting really frequent.
I meant as an excuse for his diminished capacity I'm not denying that she zotted him every time she thought he needed one.

>>30465433
>I mostly just find the idea she zotzed him whenever he did pretty much anything hilarious.
I do too, I just don't like it when people try and underplay the effort put into very nearly capturing Canterlot. My inner super villain just can't stand it.
>>
>>30465466
>just don't like it when people try and underplay the effort put into very nearly capturing Canterlot.

But that's what you're doing? Instead of implying a way she found to diminish a capable soldier who's close to the crown and marrying him without fail, she's instead relying on Shining being a failure because otherwise... she'd lose?
>>
OOCO
>SA
“AJ”
~Twilight~
~~~~

>…

“…”

>…

“…”

~Hey guys! I finally got the gum out of Cadence’s hair-SWEET MERCIFUL CELESTIA WHAT HAPPENED!?~

>Nothing.

“Nothing.”

~The ceiling has a hole in it! Every piece of furniture has bite marks! There’s a mark on the wall in the symbol of madness! A FISHBOWL IS FILLED WITH SALAS FOR SOME REASON!~

>It’s fine.

“Totally fine.”

~What is wrong with you two!?~

>Nothing.

“We’re so close.”

>See us hug?

~You’re literally trying to strangle each other right now! You have hoofprints in decorative patterns!~

>Trying a new thing.

“It’s nice.”

~I SEE BONE!~

>Mine or hers?

~HERS!~

>Ha! I win!

~I see muscle tissue with yours!~

“Ah’ll still let you say you win.”

~…why!?~

>We just learned some news.

~And that was worth fighting over!?~

“…Fighting?”

>What makes you think we were fighting?

~Then what is all this!?~

>The Canterlot Caprioles moved to Vanhoover, their mascot is a pear now.

~…~

“Ya’ll wouldn’t understand, the Carpioles are FUCKING TRAITORS FUCKING HOW COULD YA’LL DO THAT TO US!? PEARS!? YER’S SELLING YOUR LIVES TO PEARS!?”

>WAS OUR LOVE BLOOD AND SWEAT NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU!?

“WHY DID YOU ONLY TAAKKKKEEE!?”

CRASH!

>AHHHHHHH!

SHATTER!

~… the Caprioles… moved… after we built that brand new STADIUM THAT COST THE TAXPAYERS AND THEY INSISTED THEY WOULD STAY IF THEY GOT IT AND THEY LEFT!? AHHHHHHHHH!

BOOOM!

>”~AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!~”
>>
>>30465502
Look, Shiny being an Idiot was the original point I was trying to make with this >>30464289 and that is why her plan went to shit. Cause Twilight came along as the unexpected factor that caused her to lose in the end.

>>30464719
This comment said that She should have had a plan made, but it was Shiny that sent the not and probably without her knowing about it cause he was an idiot.

This comment >>30465300 was made to support that and this >>30465376 down plays her effort in actually planning her shit by implying she just mindzotted him stupid.

You feel me? Also

>capable soldier

Whaaaat? That potential story line died with S-Anon.
>>
>>30465561
>That potential story line died with S-Anon.
Wait what?
>>
>>30465527
Is this implying they hatefucked in horror?
>>
>>30465561
>and that is why her plan went to shit

Right but that's where this line

> just don't like it when people try and underplay the effort put into very nearly capturing Canterlot.

Completely falls apart.

> it was Shiny that sent the not and probably without her knowing about it cause he was an idiot.

So it's not a case of her figuring out a way to make a not idiot dumb enough she couldn't stop her, she just... has an idiot handy. That's all, she lucked into Cadence wanting to marry an idiot for-

Actually this is falling apart on the wedding thing too. He's an idiot for not calling her sooner?... why? I mean it's one thing if she was stopping him and it slipped through, but this also implies SHE fucked up by not having anything there. So she's the idiot for literally not preparing her own wedding, which made Shining have to call the Elements of Harmony for that.

>down plays her effort in actually planning her shit by implying she just mindzotted him stupid.

I'm just not understanding you here, her taking a proactive approach, mindzotzing him so he doesn't notice anything until it's too late, is undermining it, but the inactive one where she just trusts he's an idiot, the one where he called someone because he was dumb, is not?

I'm probably thinking way too hard about a 'shiny is dumb' joke though.
>>
>>30465591
I want to say maybe

>>30465582
If I remember right, S-Anon might have had a 'plan' to redeem Shiny by making his past training being buried and repressed by ptsd. I think it was mentioned in the... Badlands Adventure? The one with the Dragoness that totally saw Shiny's junk and more or less hinted at being open to getting to know it better... man I miss the adventure trio.
>>
>>30465527
NC
(Celestia)
~~~

(GOOD LORD! What happened here!?)

>The Caprioles moved to Vanhoover.

(…Whelp.)

“Whats that sound?”

~Is it getting brighter?~

(It’s done. We’re done.)

>…OH SHI
>>
>>30465640
>Dragoness that totally saw Shiny's junk

Ah... the good ol days... before S-Anon disappeared and Sombrero's was in development hell.
>>
>Guard
“Guard 2”
~~~

>…

“…what do you think they’re talking about in there?”

>Butts.

“What?!”

>I don’t fucking know man I’m just trying to look like I’m working.

“Fair enough.”
>>
>>30465238
'Cause no one really wanted/needed them in the first place. You all just need to get your shit together.
>>
>>30465779
>More than that, she watched him whack it
>She was totally into it too
>>
>>30465591
>Stricken with the horror and betrayal, the two ponies seek any sort of stability and comfort to ward off the dark feelings for just a moment longer, seeking out in each other just a moment of respite from the horrible truth, they'd been betrayed.
>This summer, sizzle along with...
>The Pair beyond the Pear.
>>
>29
"Sombra'
~~~~

>WHY!?

The changeling squealed that same question over and over as the cloud descended upon him. Before he could strike a single other one of the crystal ponies, the fangs of the far too large head had closed around him, and Changeling Twenty Nine got to learn what it truly was to be the chew toy to a massive dog.

>OW OW OW OW!

He didn't like it much.

>STOP!

Sombra's floating head thrashed like a wild animal with his eyes rolled back so that only the whites could be seen. The changeling in his mouth battered and punched at the fangs on either side of his stomach in vain, he would not be let go.

"GRRAAGGHHH!"

The end finally came when he let loose a roar, and unceremoniously dropped the changeling loose to a painful and sudden face first stop on the ground.

>...Tis there any hope thine aim is simply very, very terrible?

"LEAVE THEM ALONE!"

>I choose to take that as a no-WHY!?

The wild roar turned into a full charge, and before he knew it the changeling found himself completely rammed through the nearest faux crystal structure.

>You know, mine friends called me a madcolt to try to help thee against glowing ghosts when barely thou were known to I, save our failed venture of companionship... I'm starting to think they were right-NOT AGAIN!

"LEAVE THEM!"

Another roar, another charge and another high pitched scream sounded before being muffled by the far louder explosions of row after row after row of crystal structures, broken down by the wailing changeling's body and the charging smoke monster.

>Stop!

With every battering crash he screamed.

>Stop!

With every flail of his arms Twenty Nine prayed that he would be saved or Sombra would lose the momentum needed to use him as a glorified spear on the end of a chariot. Neither happened, all that came was pain.

>STOP!

Pain, pain, pain and more pain.

"GRRRAAAAAAGGGHHHH!"

>STTOOOOOP!

Until it all stopped.

1/3
>>
>>30466346

"GRAAAGGGGHHHH!"

Sombra's head thrashed and wailed, both could finally be heard clearly. The endless smoke behind the floating head rippled and convalesced like it was caught in the wind. His fanged mouth snapped again and again at air as his unseeing eyes looked around wildly, but found nothing. Even with all that, he never moved.

>T-...that'll do...

The pained and wounded changeling in front of him was never touched again, not even to close the small gap between the outstretched chitinous hoof and the nose mere inches from it.

>...I didn't know I could do that.

A couple of blinks confirmed the strange glow around the shadow monster was not the lasting event of a painful concussion to the head, but just as it seemed. A glow around the hole ridden hoof was perfectly matched by the very same one that now held back the specter that fought and tried to attack once more to no avail.

"LET ME GO!"

Though for how long was another question.

>Ngh! Cease! Cease this you fool!

Twenty Nine tried without success to stop the shaking of his hoof, even though the wild beast never manged to actually move forwards.

>Cease! Mine goal is to aide thee in escape from thine torment, thou art only stabbing thine own hoof with the spear! Be calm and we shall save-

"YOU'RE HURTING THEM!"

A painful little mouse squeal slipped out from the changeling when the smoke creation pushed forwards.

>I'm doing it to reach you!

"I DON'T WANT YOU TO REACH ME!"

He pushed forwards again and the changeling's hind legs nearly buckled. The light surrounding both wavered and faded in spots, almost vanishing in places.

"DON'T YOU GET IT YOU FOOL!? IT'S THE ONLY WAY! IT'S THE ONLY WAY! IT'S THE ONLY WAY!"

Sombra's words kept repeating louder and louder and the light grew dimmer.

"IT'S THE ONLY WAY IT'S THE ONLY WAY IT'S THE ONLY WAY I HAVE TO I HAVE TO I HAVE TO I HAVE TOGGRRRAAAAGGGGHHHHHHHH!"

>ENNOOOOOOOUGH!

2/3
>>
>>30466353


The Crystal Heart itself couldn't have matched the sudden burst of light that glowed from the center of the fake Empire's city. The ones that had been running towards the pair, friend or foe, suddenly found themselves pushed back beneath the explosive force and cast away like a hurricane had flown in to take them to another magical land. In the center of it all, the smoke had been scattered.

>...why...

After it had been blown away, only an emaciated, skeletal pony with a scraggly black mane and blood red horn remained. The weak little thing before Twenty Nine still tried to charge again after running on shaking legs before bouncing off the black hide without damage.

"It's the only way..."

He was still rasping and barely breathing, looking ready to fall at any moment.

"It's the only way..."

>...to what?

The red horn hit broad unguarded chitin but did not leave a scratch.

"...it's the only way..."

The shaking head lifted, letting the ragged mane part enough the changeling could see the tear filled eyes behind them.

"...it's the only way they can be happy again."
>>
>>30466358
29 is the only character who can get a new superpower but still look like a joke doing it.
>>
>>30466358
BRING
HIM
HOME
>>
>>30466387
29 is a vain, whiney, egotistical asshole who doesn't like actual confrontation and can't fight to save his life outside of berserker mode.

He's still one of the most noble and well developed character in the entire series.
>>
BRING
HIM
HOOOOOOOOOOOOME!
>>
>>30466419
Honestly he's the only reason I keep saying to give Delight a chance. We've seen an utterly shit character morph into pure CUZ TIER and have some of the funniest stories with the best chemistry around, and his origin story is 'Wants to fuck royals'. The recent stories with Siggy makes me think that maybe there can be that, a side character who shines a light on some interesting worldbuilding(29 is ghosts and Equestria History, this guy could do griffons) while still being funny.
>>
>>30466439
His origin story is technically "Want to sleep with Shiny so he can live in the castle" and morphed.
>>
>>30466387
Is that a superpower? I thought he could already do ghoststuff. I mean this might just be because Sombra is 'dead'.
>>
>>30466596
NC
>29
"MM'
'Zecora'
~Trixie~
~~~

>Huh! It actually looks like this power works on us too!

"..."

'...'

~...~

>...wait.
>>
>>30466745
>The twist is that these individuals in a heaven/hell like area filled with ghosts... are dead!

Would... would that be a twist?
>>
>AJ
"Rarity"
'Dash'

'Ok! There it is! Canterlot! We're FINALLY HOME!'

"Only took us long enough, don't you think Applejack?"

'Yeah yeah, I know at least... 4 detours that were unnecessary'

"Dash, don't you start"

'I would've kept my muzzle shut the second time, but the 3RD DETOUR WAS ENOUGH'

"Landmarks! Dash! Those were landmarks!"

'Oh pffft, we've been there before, right AJ?'

...

'AJ?'

"Wait...Applejack? Why are you falling behind...

'Urghhhhh, don't tell me she's JUST realised she's 3000 feet in the air, I'm not doing Recovery Talks midflight, AJ!"

>...

"Applejack?"

>...

"...Jackie?"

>...

"Applejack! I am not flying another hoof unless you tell me what's wrong! Do you hear me?"

>Ah'm scared

'What? Now?'

"Scared? Of... of her?"

>...

'Guh, come on AJ, we can't be doing this now, what are you so afraid of?'

"Applejack, you've saddled yourself with a monumental problem, are you really going to freeze up now?"

>No... No, it's not... not her

"Then... what? Tell us for pittie's sake!"

>It's them, all of them...

'...Canterlot?'

"...You mean Equestria, don't you?"

>...Ah'... Ah' tried to tell the ponies... show them truth before... just about worked, back in Ponyville

"'...'"

>But this... how are they gonna look at me? They're glad she's; as far as they know, dead an' gone... When Ah' tell 'em that... she's still there... and Ah' put mah own faith in her...

"...AJ..."

>Ah'm scared, Rares

"Of... their anger?"

>Y-... No, Ah'm scared Ah'd wanna tell them a Lie
>>
>>30467017
Well shit.
>>
>>30467017
>Applejack's feeling regret

Bound to happen, but it'll be interesting to see how she reacts. I'm going to assume she's not going to come outright and say it until the AUJ thing is resolved, so this could get interesting..
>>
>>30467074
Really, what can she do? She'll have to face the music sooner rather than later, Spike needs to know she's alive and if this doesn't work she might come after him, Pennydrop too. Shit, the whole A-team is in danger, even if Chitty probably doesn't even know DT and the other not-7/Spike guys were there.
>>
>>30467111
That's an interesting point Chitty has NO idea that Diamond Tiara or Silver Spoon or Daw was present, she literally never saw any of them. She might've seen PJ hanging onto Spike, but from the looks of her I doubt she'd have much of a grudge.

Considering Seven spared her and wasn't willing or able to kill her, he might be the only one she doesn't outright try to kill, but Spike and Pennydrop are straight up on her hitlist.
>>
>>30467128
This is all assuming Chitto don't keep her word, which she has done up to this point
>>
>>30467074
I don't think she feels regret so to say, just worru. She knows she's right, but after all these times where that blew up in her face, she has reason to worry that they won't believe her, Canterlot especially!
>>
>>30467285
Canterlot is going to tear her a new one. Ponyville? She could deal with that, she lived there and loved there and everyone knew her there, but Canterlot already didn't forgive her for pardoning Chitty after the Rarity incident and now this?

She's gonna be least liked princess for a while.
>>
>>30467371
>IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!

"Ah' know."

>I know, it's cruel, but it just feels... so damn goood....
>>
>>30467371
Oh yeah, Canties are gonna straight up revolt and want her to step down. Question is, will she hold her ground?
>>
>>30467658
"Maybe it won't be so bad?"

>They are literally burning an effigy of you.

"Arts and crafts is important. ..
>>
Boy I sure don't envy the guy who bites the bullet and makes AJ tell the truth
>>
>>30468478
Ha haaaaaaaaaaaa Oh it's gonna suck
>>
>>30468478
it's going to be glorious extra
>>
NC
>FS
“Pinkie”
(Dash)
{Twilight}
~~~~

>And welcome everyone to another episode of Fantastically Fixing Friendships, Featuring Fluttershy. It’s during this time that content doesn’t matter, but pie does. Isn’t that right?

“Righteo!”

>With our special guest this morning, Pinkie, we’re going to help fix a friendship.

“And I’m going to sit on the couch!”

>That she is. Our guests today are two classic friends of mine, please welcome Rainbow Dash and Twilight.

(Hey!)

{Hi, girls!}

>So, what seems to be the problem? Disagreeing on how to learn? Twilight not being active? Maybe something more interesting?

(We don’t have shows.)

>What?

“Hey! Twilight had one!”

{I lost it! The producers said I didn’t have the sex appeal!}

“Oof, know that feeling.”

{You do not!}

“Called it, I don’t!”

(I do…)

>Oh. Well, I can’t bring you on my show, keeping these short is hard enough as it is.

{That’s okay, we just wanted to sit here and take it in for a bit.}
(Let us just enjoy it, okay?)

>Uh, sure…

“…Hoooo…”

(…I feel happy.)

{I do but there’s an underlying sadness to everything I do.}

(This is the best worst thing ever.)

>So, um, is this fixed?

{Nothing will ever be fixed again.}

>…wellmaybeyoushouldputthesexbackinsexappeal-

(What?)

>I said sadly, that’s all the time we have for today. Stay kind-

“And party!”

>And party too.

{(…WHYYY-)}’
>>
>>30468478
Probably KKA.

The pain will be real.
>>
OOCO
>Spike
“SA”
‘Chrysalis’
~Twilight~
~~~~

“I’m regretting this.

‘This was your idea, dork!’

~Will you both be nice? We’re doing a bonding OnO, this if for all of us. We, together, need to come as one and prove we’re above the petty sqabbles, and can be a family again!~

‘Wait, then why am I-‘

~You wouldn’t leave. I told you to leave, I set you on fire to try to make you leave, I put tacks on your chair, I glued your character to the table, I sprayed raid all over, and I even lit a candle and prayed to the god of leaving to inhabit your form.~

‘…that raid thing was kind of racist-‘

~But since you’re here, you’re as close to family as we can get. So join us on this magical adventure, you and I and Shiny in Spikes eye, as we go across the land of a world of wonder. We’re going to have family fun.~

“I just have a really bad feeling abou-“

>You all wake up to realize you’re over a pit of spikes.

“..”
‘…’
~…~

>The trap door opens.

“…”
‘…’
~…~

>You die.

“…”
‘…’
~…Good game, everyone!~
>>
>>30470459
Guess you could say he...

Spiked a little early.
>>
>>30470545
Boooooo
>>
OOCO
>Two
“AJ”
~~~

*Polite knock*

“..Come in?”

*Respectful open*

>Hiya, Auntiejack!

“Ya’ll politely knocked before comin’ in?.. What world is this and how do Ah’ get off?”

>Ya’ don’t! Cause if ya’ got off, you’d go ta’ space, then ya’ couldn’t breath, then ya’d die, then you’d still come down. It’d all be fer’ nothin’, Applejack Prime! For nothin’!

“Ah’ can’t argue with that logic, Ah’ guess?”

>Ah’ learned from the best and Ah’ eat malleys better than the rest, Applejack Two REPRESENT!

“Word.”

>Thanks! Ah’ worked on that.

“So, what can Ah’ do for ya’?”

>Gimme an apple.

“Here.”

>Thanks!

*Turns to leave*

“Ain’t ya’ gonna eat it?”

>But then what would Ah’ put in the trap, AJ One? What would Ah’ put in the trap!?

“Uh-“

>Thought so!

*Leaves!*

“…Ah’ feel like Ah’ should’a adopted her first at some point.”
>>
>>30470545
I literally sighed and face palmed, that was horrible.
>>
>>30470870
... That would change the whole fucking world and... all I see is pain... terrible pain... things spiraling out of hand even more so... holy fuck man.
>>
>SA
“Spike
~~~

>…soooo-

“No.”

>Not even a little?

“…”

>Okay.

“…”

>…You’re just gonna keep being grumpy at me, aren’t you?

“No.”

>…

“…”

>…Do you want to boop my horn?

“What?”

>I don’t know here, I’m trying anything.

“…”

>…well I tried.
>>
>>30471008
it really doesn't feel like you did
>>
>Lightning Dust
“Soarin”
~~~~

“Applejack spotted, ma’am!”

>I know that, you idiot! We just saw her head off to the other princesses!

“Er, no, second Applejack.”

>The princess?

“Yes?”

>What’s she doing here, instead of the Empire?

“Not Applejack TWO, the second Applejack.”

>So not our Applejack.

“No, our Applejack!”

>The one with the princesses?

“That’s the second Applejack!”

>The changeling one?

“The second one, not number Two!”

>So the one that just arrived.

“No! That’s Applejack one!”

>The first one is the second one?

“N-…y-y…”

>…

“…The one with Dash.”

>Ohhhhh, why didn’t you say so?

“…”

>We need to cut down on Applejacks.

“Little bit.”
>>
>>30471174
Okay, props
>>
>>30470870
LATER!
~Big Mac~
~~~~

~Ah' do this to mah'self.~

>GOTCHA!

~Ah' let it happen and Ah' just wanna be seen again.~
>>
>>30471174
That was way funnier than it had any right to be.
>>
>AUJ
"Celestia'
'Luna'
~Twilight~
~~~~

The mare of another world wished for anything but silence when the story finally concluded.

"Damn it all..."

She came to regret that wish when she heard the Highest Princess curse in a most uncharacteristic way, with a sour sound she'd seldom heard come from anyone, let alone the most loving and caring of them all.

'We're beginning to imagine that beast made some sort of cursed pact or has found some way to render herself truly unkillable, at this rate we'll have to scorch the earth clean just to take away her air to breath.'

~Please don't joke about that...~

Very little of that had sounded like a joke to those orange ears.

>Ah'm sorry... Ah' thought Ah' could stop her, really stop her this time, but-

"You failed. Let's not sugar coat this, you somehow turned a surefire victory into one of our most dangerous losses. Good job."

It said something to the other three that the brash alicorn never once snapped back to such cutting words.

'Really, how could-'

~Let's not dwell on that, okay? She tried, it didn't work, we have to deal with it, and with her.~

>If she comes close, Ah' can-

With the unfurling of white wings and a subtle light let off from the luminous alabaster horn, the mare was silenced.

"The time for attacking her has come and past, Applejack. If there was going to be a time to go all out on her, that was the moment, and you let it slip for all of us. We're on the defensive now, we have to prepare for her sneaking in, a direct assault, or something more sinister all at once. She could attack tomorrow, she could be outside our door this moment, or it may take years before she builds up a force more powerful than even her current state could compare to, and she batters us with her fury. We don't know where she is, what she's planning, or if she's coming at all. You cannot fight her, not like this."

Even the Element of Honesty could not defend herself from that element's bite on occasion.

1/4
>>
>>30471729

'We've little choice, we must inform the populace.'

~They're going to panic, especially now. Everyone saw what she looked like when she went down and how angry she was. When they learn she's back to full power again...~

'They've reason to fear, I should say.'

None had any argument to that.

"Blast it all..."

>Ah'm sorry... Ah' should've-

"What you should have done..."

The snap held a power in it, enough that all three felt their fur stand up on end when the full attention of the alabaster mare turned to her and glared right into the downturned eyes of the battered mare. There was a hiss in every paused, and far too many of her perfect teeth shown in threat.

"You should have sought to capture her, not this. She was weak, she was hurt, and she was in no shape for a retaliation like she's capable of now. We could have detained her, given her a real trial, taken precautions... but you thought it was better to ask forgiveness than permission, didn't you? You took the world into your hooves, and you dropped it on all our heads."

The other mare never feared. Nor could she bring herself to fight back against the accusations.

'Though we cannot say we would not have thought of the same, thine failure has cost us, and now we've little hope but to figure out her next move and block it, and hope we can take most of the blow. From the looks of things...'

A telling, biting glare shifted to the wound on the mare's side.

'Thine bluster does not mean thou can handle much.'

~It also means we can't handle it, if she manages to land on us. That could easily be us if we're not careful. Any hope of detaining her just flew right out the window, and now there's no hope she'd even consider holding back on us...~

There was nothing but upset ponies and bitterness left in that room.

"...Did you ever learn what Applejack gave to her, in their talk?"

>It's better if she tells you.

2/4
>>
>>30471741

It sent an unease through the room, but none of them could bring themselves to say anything of it.

'We shall have to hope whatever it was did not come at too high a cost.'

~If it's enough to keep her from coming at us, I feel like it's going to hurt a lot more before it gets better.~

"It's not going to be good, no... but whatever the cost, we have to hope she succeeded in holding her back or something of the sort, if Applejack couldn't defeat her or stop her, then we've little choice. You made sure of that."

The wince made it clear the pony knew exactly who had been the center of that biting remark.

>...if Ah' can, Ah'll find her, and Ah'll handle it.

"I would rather you didn't make the situation worse-"

>Ah' won't!

There was still fire in those eyes, even as they looked straight to the floor and no higher.

>Ah'... Ah' won't mess up again. Ah' underestimated her, Ah' relied too much on... on others, Ah' need to make this right, and I will do it myself if that's what it takes. I'm going to handle it the moment I find some trace of her.

'Sad to say... at this point, even thine bullheaded bravado is a hope we need.'

"Sister."

The lunar mare barely gave a shrug to the scold.

'We wish if thou had tried, at least there had been a success.'

"She was wounded, badly."

'And now she's not... now what?'

The eldest sister let out a slow, calming breath to cool her nerves, deciding to speak more of that later.

~I'll have to bump up our security, but considering who we're dealing with...~

"Do what you can, anything she doesn't see coming at this point will help. Or anything we can see coming..."

They all winced at that one.

"Poor choice of words, I admit. We've much to prepare for."

'And we've still Lavan's words to deal with, and the hope Discord will not falter in his duty.'

~And we still don't know how the other countries are going to react.~

It was, simply put, a mess that only seemed to grow worse.

(PRINCESS!)

3/4
>>
>>30471744

They knew better to think that, but the realization had come too late. A guard had broken their orders not to open the door unless vitally necessary, thankfully still on the other side of the soundproof barrier that let them hear, but their guardians unable to detect a sound.

The fellow on the other side seemed to know this, saluting with as much professionalism as his frantic face could muster and not expecting a single sound from the other side as he spoke again.

(Princess Applejack and Princess Rarity have returned! And... they look unhappy.)

Any last chance for good news was taken away, and the unsettling feeling returned to each of their guts, never to leave again.

"Is there anything you can tell us of what Applejack did, just to give a preparation?"

>...You're gonna be mad.

They knew however terrible it had been, it was only the beginning.
>>
>>30471747
DAT
BEATDOWN
>>
>>30471747
I bet she just got reminded that Celly is to be feared and respected since she probably hasn't been chewed out or seen it happen before like that other time.
>>
>>30471863
Oh yeah, Celly did not hold back on this one.

>Shut up and let me tell you where you fucked up. You see this? This shit? You did this shit, and I will rub your nose in it like the bitch you are.
>>
>>30471747
>Le-leave Chitania ta me, gais.

Shoulda called in Yamcha.
>>
Hey I hope no one had any hopes of things getting better like fucking retards

But now everything in this thread is going to get Even Worse, from what I'm seeing
>>
>>30471976
>But now everything in this thread is going to get Even Worse, from what I'm seeing

I think that was just dramatic cliffhangery, everything so far has been going up since the nadir of Justice Mini. Of course things are going to eventually get better, this isn't Berserk.
>>
>>30471976
Eh, depends on how they see what AJ did.

Either
>YOU FUCKING WHAT WHAT WHAT WHY!?
Or
>Oh, that's all? That's all you did to prevent Kaijugeddon?... You know what, good job.
>>
>>30471976
You don't seem to have realized it yet, but we're not in a downward spiral on this wild ride... we're climbing... climbing higher and higher and higher still... soon we'll be cresting the top of the ramp and then we'll reach that moment when we'll be putting our hands up. What happens next I don't know but holy hera is that drop going to be fucking bonkers.
>>
>>30471995
>>30472013
>>30472018
>Hey everyone, Chitania's actually a good guy, honest

"...BREAK OUT THE FAWNTAINE-BRAND GUILLOTINE!"
>>
>>30472037
>FAWNTAINE

Prench Mare: "You would know nothing of Guillotines you uncultured swine!"

Prench Stallion: -We! Nothing! Only the Prench know anything worth knowing about the Guillotine!-

Prench Mime: =...= *Exaggerated nodding from inside the invisible box*
>>
>>30472037
This just made me realize they might actually have to play ball with Pennydrop, she's literally the only one to ever take Chitty head on and win.
>>
>>30472329
>Win
>Not delayed loss

Do you really thing she'd going to lose once she finds out that her mother's bones are inside the thing that won Round 1?
>>
>>30471747
Well, you know, Chitty wouldn't be a problem to begin with if a certain purple pony hadn't freed her from get go, sooooooo... yeah. The fuck-up train does have it's passengers but the conductor is obvious.
>>
>>30472606
I mean, we could've killed her off for good.

That'd save us SOO much trouble for every single character
>>
>>30472635
>we could've killed her off for good.
Naw, we couldn't have. We'd never. That'd be like killing AJ or Celly or Shiny at this point, too many things for them to do, too much love there, too much everything.

We could kill off Blueblood, Screwloose, 007 and Jetset could take each other out in a grand battle and the story could continue as easily as ever but there are staples here and Chitty's obviously one of them.
>>
>Spike
"SA"
~~~

>...

"...so what do you think they're talking about-"

>I'm sure they'd call us if it was important.

"Right, right..."

>...

"...but would they?"

>They'd call you.

"Come onnn."

>...

"I mean you're not wrong but still-"

>Have you ever been bitten by a dragon?

"..."

>...

"...I'm just going to read a comic book."

>Spoil anything for me and DIE.
>>
>>30472379
Oh hell no, Chitty will return and she will ruin PD's fucking day, probably in her own power armor.

But until that point from a purely checklist reference there's just PD who's actually fought her and definitely managed to take her down. That said, I feel like Celly will still be like

>FUCK NO LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO MY FUCKING COUNTRY! What's going to happen when she actually knows what you can do!? Is your plan to just break the planet and push the chunk of asteroid that was this world off into the nether? Because I feel like you'd still manage to crack the last remaining rock that had the inscription of our world on it you missile slinging nutjob!
>>
>>30472805
>Is your plan to just break the planet and push the chunk of asteroid that was this world off into the nether?

"MINDREADER! She's reading my mind! My rights are being violated! VIOLATION OF RIGHTS!"

>...

"Jokes on you, I have a backup plan!"

>Is it another stupid animal robot?

"...they'renotstupid..."
>>
>>30472865
~We would like to peruse your wares!~

"Sure! Always happy to help a clinet, mister.. oh no."

RAINBOOOOMMMM!

~RAINBOLTS! TOKUSENTAI!~

"I told you guys not to come back!"

~Can we get a discount if they're combiners?~

"SECURITY!
>>
>>30473017
Hey now, I need them, don't be making idea's for other people.
>>
OOCO
>Celestia
"AJ"
'SA'
~~~~

>Yes. Yes yes yes yes, all of the yes.

"Is this a bribe? Are you bribing her?"

>I don't care what he wants, he can have it. My cart? Comes standard with two stallions, have at it. My money? Tell me where to sign the check. Castle? Keys are in the little bowl next to my door, sprinklers are on the fritz. You want me? I'll look this way, step ladder is over there, have fun. Whatever this is for it's yours, but if you want the front end you'll have to wait, I will have my cake and eat you too.

'I actually just wanted to try baking again. It's been a while so I was worried I got rusty, but I didn't want it to go to waste, and Chrysalis is in the timeout box for trying to use a supersoaker full of catnip.'

"...why."

'She heard it was an aphrodisiac to cats and she heard the phrase-'

"Ah've heard it all and Ah'm golden."

>Enough talk, I'm having this. BANZAI!

"Wait, are you gonna-"

SPLAT!

'I... I didn't think she'd jump.'

"And yer' the one who's supposed to know her?"

'Yeah.'

"So why would you think-"

>NO! NOOOOO! WHAT HAVE I DONE IT GOT ON THE FLOOR!

"Ah."

>WHY DIDN'T YOU REINFORCE IT BUBBLEHORSE!? YOU KNOW I LIKE TO DIVE! BETRAYAL! YOU GET NOTHING! NOTHIIIINNNG!

'Er, I laid down plastic wrap-'

>You don't have to be gentle but if you get in the way of me eating I will tear off chunks of meat and not feel bad. AHM!

'...'

"Ah' think we actually need to see someone about this, this is worrying."

>GET IN ME!
>>
OOCO
>SA
"Chrysalis"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>Hey Chrysalis have you seen-

"...yes?"

>...What is that and was it anywhere near my butt when I was brain scrambled? Please... please say no.

"Haa haa... really funny Shiny."

>That wasn't a no and now I fear for my purity.

"Relax, it wasn't. This isn't even what you think it is, it's just a stinger."

>Aren't stingers supposed to be sharp and pointy and not look like... you know.

"I've been trying to get this the right shape since... I'm not sure when but I think Celestia was sporting a different mane cut at the time, you would have liked it I think, very curly, like those fries you hide from Caddy.

>... Now I'm craving, damn you!

"HAA!"

>So is this another one of those Queen powers? We haven't talked about one in quite awhile.

"Yes, but I don't think I'll ever get this one right, The Great Sting of Madam Pompilidae!"

>Sounds deceivingly impressive.

"Cousin Pepsis did have a flare for the dramatic, but don't be fooled, It hurts like nothing you've ever felt before."

>How bad are we talking here?

"Childbirth in reverse without any lubrication."

>...

"That's what I was told anyway, and I'm inclined to believe her. She would sting her enemies and her bedmates, which would also cause them to go into a temporary state of pain induced paralysis and have her way with them. She was very popular among the masochistic."

>Ow and ow... How'd that go for her?"

"Very well until she had the crazed idea about seeing what all the fuss was about, so she stung herself."

>And she died? Just like that?"

"Well it wasn't just like that, she was unable to retract the stinger and so it was still stuck there inside her. She wasn't able to take it out or call for help so she just sat there curled up like a broken fruit loop. Apparently the rest of the hive thought she was trying to set a trend and the rest just did it too. Whole Hive gone in the span of a year. I found them looking like someone spilled a bunch of black olives."
>>
>>30473503
>Useles changeling powers return

Fuck yes!

...this is also one of the rare times the thing made is LESS creepy than the actual bug it's based on.
>>
>>30473605
Nothing tops The Nightmare Horror of those fucking wasps. Nothing.
>>
>>30474063
Damn straight
>>
>>30474063
>>30474385
Cazadors... Cazadors everywhere... oh god... my caravan shoty does nothing, my plasma defender does nothing... eat grenade!... THEY FUCKING ATE MY GRENADE!!!
>>
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>>30474063
>>30474385
>>30474428
I didn't know these things existed until I actually went to Arizona to visit some relatives, I remember it was shortly after beating NV before the Old World Blues DLC came out and I remember seeing one flying by. I had trained myself to react to that coloration and as soon as I saw it I tensed thought about what could be in my inventory that would take one of those fuckers out as fast as possible and realized I wasn't it the game but REAL FUCKING LIFE. So I did the only thing I could think off, I shriek like a fucking coward and hid in our camper for the rest of the damn trip. I saw a few more during the trip and all I wanted more than anything in the world was my damn fatman.
>>
>>30473503

Oh I have been missing these like you wouldn't believe! Now someone do story night again! I need Chrysalis to tell Two nighty nights about Momsie again!
>>
Night thread!
>>
>>30473271
Ohhhhh myyyy
>>
>>30475979
Her casual offerings will always be the sexiest part of that
>>
>>30476280
Right? Was like damn
>>
>>30474707
>I need Chrysalis to tell Two nighty nights about Momsie again!

Oh god, it's been too long since one of those...
>>
>13
"007"
~~~~

>You were coming so close...

The changeling before her had nothing to say to her words but a silent wail. His mouth stretched open wide as it could go, yet not a single noise of any sort came out from it.

She would not let it.

She watched with sad eyes as he fell to his side, shaking as he felt a sensation that lived only in his mind, a pain that did not exist that would be gone as soon as she willed it, and not a moment sooner. Whatever he was feeling was of her own creation, nothing more.

>I know you'll hate me for this.

It felt as real as the air he breathed to the changeling on the ground. She had made sure of that.

>I shouldn't... I know you didn't want this, but you were figuring it out. I know you were, I could see it...

There was regret on her face as she scanned the area once more, making sure that no other had decided to walk down this hidden path at the worst possible moment, as so many other things had gone wrong today. Fortunately, the ill fate had run dry, it seemed, just for a minute. She was free for the moment.

>I'm actually surprised you honestly were trying to apologize, I thought you always hated me for what I was. But I guess we don't really know what's on the inside until we take a look, do we? I learned that the hard way recently...

That moment wouldn't last, and she knew it.

>...You won't remember this, and you won't know what I said, but I hope that some part of you, some tiny little part, remembers what you did, and remembers how it all went wrong. I've learned things in this last day, lots of things I never imagined... I hope somewhere, you do the same.

With her final words spoken, she rose up, turned her back on the changeling prone on the ground, and headed towards her meager possessions.

Without ever looking back, her horn lit up, and she heard the near inaudible hiss of agony as her magic reached his mind.

>Goodbye, Changeling Zero Zero Seven.

1/3
>>
>>30477114

"F-f-ff-ffff..."

She stopped.

"Fff-fff..fffff.f.ffff.....ffff..."

Her mind raced as she thought he should not be able to make that sound, confusion wrought in her still spellcasting mind as she turned back to him.

"Ffffe....ff...."

He was on the ground, his eyes still glowing with her spell still worming it's way into his skull and past the horn that was blazing just as brightly as her own to no effect.

>You shouldn't be moving...

He defied her, with a single hoof slamming hard into the ground, and a creaking body beginning to rise.

"Ffff...fff...."

>How... how are you-

His head jerked up, and she could finally see into his glowing and blazing eyes.

She could finally see that something was wrong.

"Fffffuuu..."

Something was stirring in them, something twisted, not at all like the changelings mind she even now was forcibly suppressing. Something was happening.

"Ffffffffuuuuu...."

Her power rose to it's peak, covering him, digging into him, nearly bringing him low as it tried to push back the last remnant o everything that was changeling about him.

It came too late.

Something else in him was too strong to be held down.

"FuuuUCKING FLLLLLAAAAAAKE!"

He stepped forwards, her heart raced to an unstoppable flurry, and with one final push, she unleashed her power, pushing down everything that he was, and everything that lied on the surface away in a final desperate act.

He froze in place mouth open, eyes empty, a statue that still breathed.

>...s-sweet love above...

She shook, her chest raced, her brow was soaked in sweat, but he'd stopped.

To the hivemind and her mother within she praised, he'd stopped.

>...How did he-

For only a moment.

>WHAT!?

A sudden low, bestial growl emerged, and her stumbling hooves danced back.

2/3
>>
>>30477121

>How-how are you doing this!?

His eyes were blank no longer, but they no longer held the light they'd had before. Something else was behind them, something else had taken their colors.

Something that made him snarl, bend low, and bare his teeth to her.

>Stay back!

She pushed into his mind once more, trying to suppress everything changeling about him.

She found nothing to push in.

Nothing changeling remained.

>...Oh shit.

Only whatever made him roar like a wild animal, and leap into the sky.

>OH SHIT!
>>
>>30477127
>7 overcomes her with the power of racism

I can't
>>
>>30477127
>7 is literally going beast mode

Now you done fucked up!
>>
>>30477179
I seriously never thought he'd say flake again. What a glorious return.
>>
>>30477127
Nani?! My attack... He's getting stronger?!
>>
>>30477279
>7San! I will not let you win for the honor of my family!

"RREAAGGAGABANAGGANAGSJA"

>You are really taking the dramatics out of this
>>
>>30477127
OMAKE!
~~~~~~HOURS LATER~~~~~

"Uuggghh, my... head... what happened?"

>Things went awry.

"Thirteen? What?... Why do I have you in my hooves?"

>You went a bit... primal.

"Oh shit, I didn't try to eat you, did I?"

>No, selfish bastard.

"...wait."

>This isn't a regular thing and I'm not doing it again, no matter what I was screaming during.

"...WHAT!?"

>...EHHHH, one more round.

"WAIT A MINUTE!"

ZOTZ!

"RRRAAAAGGGHHHHH!"

>I like you better this wayOHDEARLOVEYES!
>>
>>30477406
And that's 13.

Is there any non-CE Crew female changeling he hasn't been with in these omakes?
>>
OMAKE
>AJ
"Rarity"
~???~
~~~~

>Alright, Ah'm gonna tell 'em!

"Are you sure that's wise, darling?"

>Pshaw, why wouldn't it be? What're they gonna do, yell at me? Impeach me? Ah'd prefer it at this point. Hey! Everyone! Ah' got news!

~~~~~~


~BURN THE WITCH! BURN THE WITCH!~

>Ah' somehow did not see this comin'.

"Well I always did think you were... hot!"

>...that's the last thing Ah'll ever hear.

FWOOSH

>Ah' die without regrets.
>>
Did we get unlock?
>>
>>30477484
Let's find out!

>Twilight learns no food makes you better at sneaking.
That's not how helium works.>>30422379
>Pinkie is not as pink as you think!
More red.>>30411707
>Fluttershy tries to teach a pony to fly!
Problems solved, 0. >>30409293
>Cadence wonders what pony tastes like and can't believe the answer.
Chrysalis has it, so, >>30461828
>Celestia has her cake, but she'll eat him too.
If he gets in her way, that is. >>30473271
>Cheerilee wants none of these kids me mes.
NoNE!>>30440317
>Applebloom leans you can't split a pair.
But you can split a ground!... wait.>>30435662
>Lots of growing fanservice!
Growing DREAD!... >>30471747... oh okay fine, someone do something sexy with Chitty.
>>
>>30477504
OMAKE
>Chitania
"Chrysalis"
~???~
~~~

>So, wait, you're saying we can shapeshift our genders?

"That's the rumor Cimicidae started."

>Huh.

"...Are you thinking about it?"

>Nah, I'd kill most bed partners just sitting there and waiting, can you imagine if I had to actually be proactive?

"There has to be A species that can take you. Like, there's a billion of them."

>...hhrrmmmm...

~~~~~

~So if I do this, I'll get gems?~

>Yep.

~Neato! It's not mating season, but who gives a fuck, I'm down for some dragon deliciousness!~

>So you work out, right?

~Eh, I think about it sometimes, why?~

>...she'll still probably survive.

~What was that-OH SWEET RUBY LOVE!~

>This mountain we're next to sure as fuck won't though.
>>
>>30477532
ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED!
>>
>>30477538
PP anon? You around and up for a proph?

If not, we'll understand.
>>
>>30477542
By the by, if he isn't, this mark the firdt time I actually *AM* around! You know? The, ah, stand-in who wasn't around the last two times? Ssssssooooo only if he isn't, I'll fill thide big, honking clown's shoes.
>>
>>30477638
Glorious! I thought you dropped off the face of the earth!

Don't forget to do the achievement too.
>>
>>30477653
OHMAHGAWSH does that mean I can do it?! OOOOOOOooooOooo! ON IT!
>>
>>30477670
I'm not PP anon for the record, I was just saying IF.

He probably won't mind tho
>>
OMAKE!
>Spike
"SA"
~~~

>...so is my thing coming up yet?

"Should be any moment now."

>God, I hope so.

"..."

>...this is going to hurt me, isn't it?

"You!?"

>Ah. Right.

"..."

>...Pleasekilltheshipping-

"Probably will."

>YES.
>>
>>30477179
me neither
>>
Omuku
>Delight
"29"
~~

>So you're saying I have a chance to become popular?

"Verily! Though just needs the right storyline."

>Cool! What do you do?

"Well before this eternal namek of a saga I'm in now, I helped orphans who are dead find peace in the afterlife."

>...

"Also I have a zebra."

>Diverse.
>>
>>30477179
More like
>The black character overcomes thinking by reverting to his animalistic instincts.

007 would make Marvel spin it's head.
>>
>>30477828
And this is bump!

Looks like you got the go ahead to prophesize >>30477638 dude! Bring us a prophesy of wonder!
>>
NEWWW THREAAADDDD >>30477858
>>
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>>30477504
>>30477538
>>30477851

https://www.myinstants.com/instant/achievement-unlocked/
>>
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td8sixPC.png
17KB, 622x120px
>>30477939
( http://www.myinstants.com/instant/achievement-unlocked/ )

~~~

The final OMAKE scene finishes and - the smiling faces of those on-scene, the colorful backdrop, and even the upbeat music - everything slowly fades to black.

...Silence. Enduring, all-encompassing silence swallows up everything.

And yet, it lacks a certain sense of closure. Something vital is amiss. Without it, the show continues, but doesn't move forwards. That is, until...

A perfectly white pegasus mare with with a vividly yellow mane and raspberry pink eyes walks across the screen. Crossing it from left to right, she doesn't seem to be aware of being seen until she is right in the middle of it, prompting her to pause, blink and do a double-take at the viewers.

>Huh...? Oh! Hey there, everyone!

“...”

>Uuuhm... I guess you expected Pinkie Pie to do the Outro and preview?

The camera bobs up and down, as if nodding.

>Weeeeeeell... due to, you know, personal stuff and all the icky, bleh-bleh seriousness that entails, your bestest outro-pony is temporarily unavailable.

A sharp gasp come from the crowd... or the speakers, who knows?

>But dont'chuu worry. She left a note, telling someone to stand in. Namely, me!

Party-poppers and streams ballons crack across the black scenery, colorful baloons rising up from below.

>SURPRISE!

Surprise glances from left to right, then leans towards the screen conspirationally, hiding her muzzle with one hoof pressed to the side of it.

>Just this time, I think, so don'tcha worry. Your best friend and party-maker will be back in no time, you'll see.

Suprirse grins cheerfully, winks, then reaches off-screen to slide an oversized 90s boombox next to her.

>So, in the spirit of the show... LET'S DO THIS!
>>
>>30477953

---

The OUTRO begins playing: http://youtu.be/GAoG6JYgWf8

>Wowie, Zowie, what a mess everyone found themselves in this time! After the fight between AlternateUniverse-Applejack and Chitania, the former limps back to Canterlot, determined to shoulder all the blame. As the princesses are trying come to terms with the revelation that the unknown entity temproarily trapped beneath Hoofington might be, at least in part, be their Mother, poor AUJ gets the chewing-out of her lifetime!

>But, to make matters worse, Chrysalis' and realize that with her mother gone, chances are high that 13 will go rogue. With the silent alarm sounded in Canterlot due to AUJ's commands, things begin escalating in silence, until 07 steps into 13's way and finds out she has been in recent contact with her mother! Unwilling to stop and be found out, 13 takes control of 7's mind, unaware that something darker slumbers within his psyche!

>"FuuuUCKING FLLLLLAAAAAAKE!"

>How will the possibly frailest and most unlucky Changeling alive fair, confrotned with a beast immune to her powers? What will the royal sisters do, forced onto a wild goose hunt to track down the remnants of the Darkness that their own progenitor severed into individual beings strewn all across the world? And how will Equestria handle the revelation their greatest enemy now controls the Sun?

>Find out next time, on Thread 204: The sun sets over Equestria! See ya there!

Surprise waves cheerfully as a colorful text slide in from the right, prclaiming: PREVIEW in big, bold letters, followed by small snippets showing various, outrageous scenes happening in the next thread.*


>"Twilight's mind races!"
>"Cadance thinks about what she could do!"
>"Celestia knew there was no help, no help from you!"
>" Luna sounds the drums!"
>"Applejack feels a beating in her heart!"
>"Pennydrop brings the thundering guns!"
>"13 swears '[he] tore me apart'!"
>"Pinkie Pie has been.. thunderstruck!"


--- See you in Equestria, cowmare~
>>
>>30477953
Creative! I like it!
>>
>>30477979
>The recap is in it

Fucking.

Glorious.

10/10 would pone
>>
>>30477979
Whoa, this is probably the first time in a long time where I missed the thread because I wasn't paying attention.

You did great!
Thread posts: 509
Thread images: 16


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