Satyr Abomination Thread #212: Fathers Day Edition

>>30316101
That Author List is kinda depressing in a way.
>This list is for the sole purpose of keeping track of the writers
>Nobody is using names when they post stories here

>>30316195

I mostly write short one shots now. And I forgot my trip
https://pastebin.com/u/CYOA_AiE

>>30316233
Are you the "Today was a X kind of day" guy?

>>30316322
Somtimes. Not all the green is of my work

>>30316353
I love those one-shots. I hope you'll keep writing them.

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>>30316367
Well glad ya like em man. Dont see myself leaving satyr or stop writing for it. Lots of fun with these little cuties.

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>>30316380
>Dont see myself leaving satyr or stop writing for it.
Good to hear.

>Lots of fun with these little cuties.
There sure is.

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ITT we talk about and post dads of satyrs and their kids. Who are they? What do they do? Are they lovable dads or scary?

>>30317150
Are you thinking about dads who aren't human, like Big Macintosh, Sombra, Braeburn, and so on?

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>>30317583
Dads is dads anon. Could be human, pony, satyr anything man. Just curious of what anyone had.

>>30317604
>Lotte
Ugh

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>>30317700
>I cant just ignore a picture and go on with the premise

Here, a picture that does not contain Lotte. Can you add something now?

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>>30317150
Very loving. Man would have to be to raise 4.5 kids and Cottonball all on his own.
Probably has more scars than he can count, though.
Likely spends what little money they get hauling their crops to town buying his girls little luxuries that otherwise simply aren't possible living in the middle of nowhere.

>>30317604
When it comes to humans, it is often so that you are the dad, though it would be funny to see famous movie stars be the satyr's parent. So what do you guys think you'd be able to do for a living in Equestria? And would you be a lovable or a tough parent?
Me, I'd probably end up being a bit too overprotective of my kid the first couple of years, but for good reasons.
>End up in Equestria
>Figure that you will never be able to start a family of your own due to there being no other humans around (yet)
>Get depressed over that, but eventually accept it and move on with life
>Fall in love with a cute mare and settle down with her
>Some time later, she comes bearing shocking news
>She's pregnant
>Many months later, she gives birth to a healthy little satyr
>Noone has any idea how this was even possible
>A human knocking up a pony
>Was it because of some unexplainable magical thing that only happens once every thousand year?
>It doesn't matter
>What matters is that you have something now that you thought you'd never be able to get
>A family
>And you'll be damned if you're gonna let anything happen to them

>>30317915
Which satyr's most likely to end up with overprotective human dad?

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>>30317891
I figured with a gentle giantess like Ari she would be the most effective means of transport. And maybe Cotton helps with the farming? Where predators like Lenora and Kimmy do the meat hunting. The whole family can probably be really self sufficient. Also wants Anon a pretty famous retired author who made a comfortable living selling his "Fantastic Beasts and where to bed them." bio?

>>30317915
>So what do you guys think you'd be able to do for a living in Equestria?
I dont usually write myself as the partent desu. But I try to write the more every everyman I can think of so self insertion is easier. In a story that was not satyr related I had Anon work as a trench digger and maintenance man for Outhouses. Given humans are like "blank flanks" they would have to do jobs that require labor and hands on stuff. But if I was a dad, probably tough or distant. But I would love my children.

>>30318175
Annie for sure. Pogo probably given his wifes nature. And Laika too.

>>30318284
Did Sombra marry a dude or something?
'Cause I don't really see many other ways for her to get an overprotective HUMAN dad.

Honestly I'd personally expect the Pinkie kids to have the least overprotective attitudes ever. That or they'd try to be discreet with their overprotective methods. TRY.

>>30318284
Ari is probably the one to pull the cart, yeah.
Everyone probably helps with the farming, though Cottonball, might be the main worker on that.
I've always had them living in a large valley miles from civilization, so they could likely grow enough to eat, pick/jar and store, and have some to sell.
Kimmy, Mera and Lenora are probably pretty good at bringing down game. Jerky is probably a common lunch in the household.
Firginia I hold as being the youngest by at least 6 years, so she's probably only allowed to hunt small game till she's older.

I don't know about famous. Honestly, never put much thought into that idea, but maybe him scratching down stuff now and then is how Ariana got into writing? I hold it as a serious headcanon that Ariana is an electra, so her interests mimicking his early on would make sense.

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>>30318344
Fathers day honors all dads anon. not just the human ones. Besides werent some anons saying we dont get enough pony x satyr interactions?

>>30318344
... what're you; a faggot or a retard?

>>30318376
Sure, bringing up pony dads is great, but that specific answer didn't fit my particular question.

But here's an idea to bring up more pony & satyr interaction: How do some satyrs get along with their pony (or non-human) grandfathers?

>>30318175
>>30318440
Ah I see, sorry missed the human part. Im juggling like 3 different things right now. Sorry man

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>>30318414
I mean, I am legally considered mentally disabled...

>>30318597
If that's true, now I feel bad. If it's not; fudge you, butthole.

>>30318933
Fair enough, I guess. Not like I can really prove it without giving away too much personal information.

Though being the target of those sorts of questions is the one thing that ever makes me hesitant to stick around.

>>30318992
Sorry to hear that, man.
People call each other retarded and autistic all over the internet, though. I'd hope we wouldn't loose people over something like that.

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Anyways, onto a more thematically related topic, I have chosen to celebrate Fathers' Day by showcasing one of the less good at it ones.

>>30319392
Dammit, I forgot to sign it again- OneOverTwo.

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>>30319392
>Those curves on her body
>That unkempt body with armpit hair
>Her being a lovable weeb that I would impregnate over and over again
>Mfw

Also really nice pic man, its nice to see some pony and satyr interactions. How would a house of neets celebrate fathers day? I may write a short on this if I have the time.

>>30319424
Two options come to my mind: 1. Lie around at home doing nothing. 2. Get someone to buy them a meal at a restaurant that they don't have to dress up for.

>>30319453
I can see number 2 being a hard likely. I was thinking Gale would break down and use his hard earned money to buy pizza and soda for everyone.

>>30318992
Buddy, these questions are used all the time. Sometimes not even as questions! 4chan has a very hostile community. It comes with the anonymity. I am sure most of the thread poves having you around; regardless of anything else.

>>30319502
Loves. Not poves. Is poves even a word?

>>30319392
Drizzle is a cutie. Nice to see more of her.

>>30319392
Do you take Father's Day requests? Would love to see more pony and satyr interactions.

Speaking of, what about the ponies' dads?
>Rarity's husband is working out of town for a week
>So she decides to pay a visit to her own parents and say hi to her dad
>And she is obviously taking the kids along with her

>>30320694
The answer is: I'm not really feeling it at the moment so I'm not going to do requests right now.

>>30319392
>Kids say they don't plan to give their dad anything on Father's Day
>Mom hears that and gets upset
>She hands them some money and basically forces them to go out and buy something for him

>>30320958
Could be cute. Their will and resolve will be tested as they have to brave slightly longer than normal lines, mid day sun, and thinking of something to get him. 2 cruel, they are but children!

>>30321635
>Their will and resolve will be tested as they have to brave slightly longer than normal lines
Their will and resolve will be tested even further if the lines are filled with senior citizens who has shopping carts filled to the brim with small items, or who wants to pay everything in coins.

>>30321818
>who wants to pay everything in coins
>after spending 20 minutes counting half a jar of coins, one of them gets a sudden case of alzheimer's and starts over
>though usually calm and controlled, Gale is feeling an increasing urge to commit homicide

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>>30321933
>though usually calm and controlled, Gale is feeling an increasing urge to commit homicide
Good thing a mall cop is there to keep an eye on troublemakers.

>>30322018
Pogo had to take the job to pay for his own father's gift. 2 days till retirement man, will he make it out alive?!

>>30322051
Alive, but forever scarred.
Literally. He slipped on a spill and got a nasty cut from the pickle jar it came from.

>>30322093
Yesh. Is it a cool scar like on his arm he can show off to his senpai to later? Or did it really hurt him?

>>30322162
Probably on the arm, yeah.
He might have needed minor surgery over it, but no loss of mobility when it was healed, so it's all good. He probably got a decent settlement out of it too.

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>>30317150
Little Yuzu's homework was to write about a person of her choice. She doesn't understand grammar or spelling very well yet.

>I decidid to write about my daddy becuse he is the bestest daddy in the world. He maks me smile when I am sad and he says I have cute ears. He maks sure there is no monster under my bed and is rely brave becuse he even cheks in the closet to. He can be very scarry some times like when mummy left us and he got mad at her but I love him and he loves me. he always helps me with my home work even when he is very tired. My frend Mistake likes him alot to. He always brushes my hair befor bed and reads me a story becuse I like it and it is very relaxin. I dont like his new lady friend. She has a big fat butt. I love daddy becuse he says he will never leave me. This is why he is the bestest.

>>30318284
>>So what do you guys think you'd be able to do for a living in Equestria?
Customs and immigration officer at the dimensional portal. I'd get to keep minorities out and stop the import/export of illegal substances.

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>>30322290
Aww. Cute.
I bet Yuzu was just the cuddliest little bat burrito when she was a tiny kid.

>>30322583
I think she still is.

>>30322810
As a father you can't help but see your little girl as anything but, but she is growing anon. Remember that.

>>30322290
Wouldn't it be funny if she actually liked her when she was little saying she was funny because she has a big butt and always plays games where she knocks things over with it. Then as she gets older resents her a little more.

>>30322833
Maybe, though I've always pictured Yuzu as being extremely possessive of her dad and unwilling to share his attention on account of having some pretty deeply engrained abandonment issues and separation anxiety, brought on by her mother walking out on her.

That's just my version of her though.

>>30323540
"Darcy, sweetheart, you need to laugh smugly when you eat fruit salad, not stare with a dead inside smile."
>"Yes sir, uncle 'Non."

>>30322872
Nice thought

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What would make the best Father's Day picture?

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>>30324063
Satyr grown up with their old man. Preferably something like pic.

>>30324063
Anon being crowned King of the Dads by Dawn and Radiance

>>30324063
Eirwen presenting her dad with a little sculpture she chiseled out.

>>30324063
Sombra giving a piggy back ride to Annie and Salai as kids.

Darcy and Gala having a beer with Big Mac

>>30324063
Tonsils gives her dad the antidote

>>30324063
Warren and Trouble shoes each having a pint.

>>30324112
Forgot to add that there are plenty of satyrs I'd like here. Utah or any Apple, Rory, Hope, Pogo, or Garret.

>>30324063
Muddle and Gargle doing flame target practice with dear old dad Garble.

>>30324063
Dad Anon playing Airplane with a little Pegasus satyr.

>>30324900
Then the pegasus satyr sort of figures out how to fly at the least opportune time.

Is art friend dead?

>>30325287
Yeah

>>30325612
F
How many artfags we have?

>>30325901
5 at most.

/d/
DJ
MT
OneOver2
OneOver2's clone.

And Varg. But he doesn't really come here.

But DJ usually comes and goes.

>>30325943
>OneOver2's clone
Sum1Else
>Varg
Vag

There's also LazerBlues, Hesh, at least two beginner artfags, the guy from strange waifus who's been drawing Caerulea, and a handful of editors.

>>30324063
Flutterdad getting swarmed by his youngish horde of childrenfor hugs.

>>30325943
When was the last time Vag even posted in /sat/ or /sad/?

>>30327198
A few months ago I think?
I wish he would post more.

>>30327286
He still draws, but doesn't visit the threads. Should say a lot.

>>30328925
Is that Hiki?

>>30328942
ye

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i found this one i did
>three years ago

>>30329189
A cute!

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>>30329189
That Vinny's work?
Speaking of, does anyone have the old pic he made of Amira's kid? I looked for it a while back, but couldn't find it.

>>30328942
yeah, one of the first pics of her

>>30327510
Well all he seems to draw are just kind of samey drakes anyway. He'd get a backlash if he posted most of that shit here

>>30329484
Only by the same guy who always bitches about stuff here regardless.

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>>30329484
>He'd get a backlash if he posted most of that stuff here
There is literally nothing wrong with posting drakes so long as you don't make things extremely fucked up or autistic beyond words.
I was really hoping to see more of that monster hunting thing.

>>30329895
Sure, though I find his obsession with giving Simmer tits and megahips sort of autistic in the same way we'd want to avoid.

The concept isn't bad per ce, but I think it's a bit much to stack trappy madness on top of it. That's just me though.

>>30330100
I always saw drakes as being especially hipful compared to their fellow abominations. The tits though I don't really recall Simmer having.

>>30329895
>I was really hoping to see more of that monster hunting thing.
This. I really liked those stories that were posted by someone, possibly Vag, a while back.
Some of the best we've gotten in a long time.

>>30330178
>I always saw drakes as being especially hipful compared to their fellow abominations
Drakes do tend to have rather large hips, yes.

>The tits though I don't really recall Simmer having.
I don't really get those either, no.
He may look a bit girly, but I imagine he'd be flat as a board.
I always had him figured for a light agile fighter dual-wielding daggers or small swords and preferring stealth to just charging in.

He'd let Broil handle any charging in and beating shit up with a giant sword they needed while he tried to sneak in on their enemies and damage and/or incapacitate them by targeting their most vulnerable spots. He'd spend a lot of time studying books about the anatomy of the various monsters and species of Equestria to figure out their weak spots.

>>30330100
>>30330178
>Tits
Is this new? I haven't seen anything posted on Derpi that looks like it.

>>30331082
Doesn't surprise me. It was a /sad/ pic and it's shit imo

>>30331086
>Another benifical comment that doesn't drive content creators away at all

>>30331096
I'm entitled to my opinion. The pic was bad. Extremely rough garbage.

>>30331115
And we're entitled to disagree.

>>30331096
Agreed.
>There are people who still think the thread isn't hostile despite this stuff being posted fairly regularly

>>30331115
To be honest Vag never did have the most appealing style.

>>30331294
2 u.

>>30331294
I rather like his style.

What does zatyr think about this year's E3?

>>30331198
>>30331254
Such is the beauty of 4chan.

>>30331428
Was ok, Nintendo won.

>>30331428
Satyr is curious about the new Metroid 2 remake.

I like Vag's art, it's pretty original
>>30331428
was lame

>>30331453
Did you watch the invitationals Nintendo gave afterwards? They were pretty hype, especially the ARMS one.

>>30331466
I didn't get a chance to watch through those, no. I want to go into most of the games pretty fresh so I'm avoiding most footage from the titles.

>>30331428
Muddle was pissed how they keep injecting SJE shit into all the games. They didn't even try to hide it with how all those stonk independant zebras who don't need no male were killing all those evil white ponies. It was disgusting.

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>>30331428
Doesn't matter to them. Not part of their universe. At most they saw something about it in the background in a comic.

>>30331487
What games are they doing that in?

>>30331518
Beyond Good Blacks and Evil Whites.
Far Goy 5
To name the most recent.

>>30331487
huh

>>30333196
Yeah

I used to be able to nollie mctwist 900 darkslide anti-casper, too

>>30333196
So is this satyr boy as totally radical as I desperately hope he is?

>>30333218
>"Look, ma! No bones!"

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>>30333218

>>30333316
The most important part, really, is for him to talk like an allegedly cool kid from nineties media. Sprinkle in some "tubular"s, "radical"s, "duuuuude!"s, "mondo"s, etc.

I personally think we need a satyr that talks like that particular flavor of idiot. I love them.

>>30333196
>>30333316
>baseball hat isn't on backwards
I'm calling the meme police.

>>30333369
he's going to get punched if he talks like that consistently.
>"Yo, yo, yo! What is UP, my bros! Shit is like so, radical, dope, phat, stupid fresh, fly right now, pham."

>>30333394
That doesn't make me want him to talk like that less.

Just makes me want to see the punches.

"Yo, yo, yo!" & "pham" might still be a bit too much though.

>>30333333

>>30331096
>We should praise and worship everything, no matter how retarded it is
Giving Simmer boobs was just plain stupid and made no sense at all. It only made an otherwise nice pic look dumb as hell.

>>30333792
Shame he didn't just turn it into a Broil pic. Atleast it wouldn't be creepy.

>>30333792
So did the artist actually say he drew Simmer with boobs?

>>30333833
There was no need to. It's clearly illustrated in the image that he's got boobs now. Hell, considering I couldn't see a dick, he could be a full on girl now.

>>30333861
Anon needs to hold Simmer and Broil down and forcibly impregnate them like the ladies they are.

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>>30333810
hows that?

>>30333903
While this is a cool edit and bashful Broil gets my dick rock hard, that isn't the art we're talking about. But you're certainly free to post a nude edit of this, by all means.

>>30333920
Oh, what was the picture in question?

>>30333934
I didn't bother save it. You could probably ask for someone else to post it in /sad/. I heard he had a Tumblr, but I don't know it.

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>>30333810
I was just about to say the same thing. Would have made it so much better.
>>30333934
Went ahead and searched for it in the archives.
https://desuarchive.org/trash/thread/9230469/#9270447

>>30333792
>WAhhhhh, an artfag with talent I have drew something I can't and hate
>Waaaaah, I'ma shit on his taste because he won't listen to me
>Waaaah
Need a diaper change there, champ?

>In Greek mythology, a satyr is one of a male companions of Dionysus with goat-like features and often permanent erection.

New headcanon:

all satyrs have permanent erection.

>>30334060
/sad/ is in the other way, man

>>30334010
>We must start circlejerking over everything!
>No criticism allowed! It triggers me greatly
Would it make you happier if everyone started sucking everyone's dicks?

>>30334206
>You can only criticize stuff I don't like
Eat a bag of dicks.

>>30316101
How exactly does Darcy's sitting pose in this pic work?
Does she have two sets of knees, or do her thighs curve?

>>30333861
>There was no need to.
So in other words there was no problem but you decided to make it a problem and keep lying about what an artist intended. So in other words you're a shit starter. Got it

>>30334206
>it's another "we have to be cruel and edgy to content creators becuz we r legion XD"
Fuck off to /b/

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I just realized that I don't think I've ever seen any discussion about how old Drizzle and Gale are and what they do for a living.

Personally I imagine Drizzle as being 15-16 and Gale a year or two older, and both of them attending the Equestrian equivalent of high school.

Any thoughts on this, or other headcanons?

>>30336056
No, I think Tomoko and her brother are that, too.

>>30336097
IIRC, Tomoko starts high school at the beginning of the series. I guess she's 2nd or 3rd year now.

>>30336056
I never thought about how old they are usually, I just have different general age ranges in mind depending on the drawing.

Gale's definitely older than Drizzle to me, maybe about three years.

>>30336224
>I never thought about how old they are usually, I just have different general age ranges in mind depending on the drawing.
Yeah, that makes sense.

>Gale's definitely older than Drizzle to me, maybe about three years.
Huh, what do you think he'd be doing after high school?
Go to pony university? (if such a thing exists)
If so, what sort of subject would he study?
If not, what sort of job would he do?
Or would he just be a NEET and freeload off his parents perhaps?

>>30334289
>>30334733
>Artist draws Simmer with boobs all of a sudden
>Anon nr 1: "Why didn't he just draw Broil instead if he wants boobs?"
>Anon nr 2: "No idea. Would have been better if he did since Simmer is a dude, not a female."
>You: "Huff huff, how DARE you shit in something someone drew instead of blindly praising him?! You faggoty fag shitposters with your hostile as FUCK attitude are what's killing this thread!! You are all "waah waah" and poop yourself. Want me to change your diapers before you fuck off to /b/? Huehue"

>>30336738
>Being this delusional to the truth
Yeah, more than likely a troll

>>30336738
>>30336835
>Cherry picking
>Ignoring people calling an artist's work shit and autistic to push a narrative the thread only has trolls who drive away CCs
>Supporting the hostility in the thread
You're what's wrong with satyr.

>>30336835
>>30336901
So you're a trolling and hostile faggot if you think males having female boobs is stupid?

>>30336965
Well, the pic wasn't made for you and people like it, so yes. If other people's enjoyment of the thread ends where your opinions begin; you're basically on level with a Tumblr bitch

>>30337129
>replying to a troll
All he is gonna do is move goalposts and say things that are not true like he even admits here >>30333861 where he admits that the artists never even said Simmer had boobs and he's just making shit up to justify being angry.

>>30337172
Seriously? Did you even look at the picture?

>>30337129
>You're basically on a level with a tumblr bitch
Says the one who practically demands that everyone should either give up all sorts of standards they have and praise exactly everything anyone posts no matter the quality, or fuck off because they're "hostile trolls".
>>30337172
>like he even admits here
>Implying I'm him
>he's just making shit up
Did you even take a fucking look at the link to that pic that other guy posted?
>>30333945

>>30336568
I think Gale would definitely want to find a job & become self-sufficient.
Tries to find something relatively stable.

(Drizzle might end up freeloading off of him & any others he'd live with in the future to his chagrin.)

>>30337401
>Gale gets a job
>Suddenly his dad won't stop pestering him for money

>>30337172
This

>>30336056
I just imagine that they are both still in school.

>>30337441
Hopefully Zephyr Breeze has a job as a hairdresser. Unless Femanon is the man of the house.

>>30338450
Even having a job doesn't stop some dads from asking you for money and promising to pay back next week every week.

>>30338450
I always imagined that Zephyr's Femanon would keep Zephyr Breeze relatively responsible.

Not that she'd be a paragon of responsibility or anything; I headcanon that they met with one or both of them drunk at a bar or something like that.

>>30338962
>It's an rgre setting.
>He's so submissive that she's a husband beater and forbids him from having a herd.

>>30338987
Definitely not what I have in my mind:

Loving partners, loving parents, both bad at both.

So what are some satyrs' human parents probably like?

>>30339568
boring like our own parents

>>30339589
Oh I'm sure they can be boring in their own ways.

>>30339598
my dad used to be cool, man

had a motorcycle, listened to the rock and roll
but now he just yells at the tv and argues with talk radio and owns a shit ton of boring old country records

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"Oh my god you guys shouldn't have."
>You look over the massive spread before you, beans, rice, ribs and chicken. And those soda's you like as well. It was truly a man's man's feast.
>Fluttershy places her hoof atop your hand and lovingly rubs it as she looks you in the eye "It was the least we could do dear, you've been working so hard, and helping around the house. It was only right we let you eat what you want today."
>Its then Thorn speaks up with her usual growl "If we were just gonna let him eat what he wants then why do we still need to be here?"
>"Thorn, today is Fathers Day, we're all gonna be here for your father and eat as one big happy family."
>"Tsk, I guess." she trails off before taking away at her cell phone and sighing.
>Timber takes a hard swig of his soda pop and sighs refreshed before reaching over for the rice and begins serving himself.
>With first blood drawn you begin to serve yourself as well. Ivy takes a rib and daintily holds it up to her mouth before slowly biting down.
>Her mouth being caked with grease she chews happily but tries to wipe it clean. Smearing a grease trail across her face and then fussing with the napkin trying to save her face.
>Flora and Fauna fight one another for serving rights as you look to your happy larger family. A small tear comes to your eye as you hide your softer side and begin eating.
>Today was a great day to be a dad.

>>30339754
I always knew the Flutter-Family were ravenous meat eaters.

>>30339614
My dad is the coolest. He paid for my college.
>>30339860
Who is and isn't?

>>30339860
Just the dad and kids. The mom is a fierce vegetarian. But even then, meat is only for big celebrations only. So Anon is always excited when meat is on the menu.

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>>30339865
>Who is and isn't?
Not him but I imagine that Thorn, and Timber are the biggest meat eaters and often sneak out with their dad to grab some meat when they need a fix. Ivy, Flora and Fauna are ok with waiting and treat it more like a rare reward for parties and stuff.

>>30339865
I'd say Ivy's the most eager for meat meals.

But she tries to restrain herself a little to set a good example for her younger siblings. She succeeds (usually).

>>30339906
>>30339919
I was thinking a bit more than the Flutter family.

>>30339754
Which families don't get to enjoy the deicious meaty taste of meat?

>>30340048
Probably the ones who are farmer's children, their parents worked hard growing those apples, carrots, rocks, etc.!

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>>30340048
Petunia lived her whole life not eating any meat. She was told from a young age by the other cows to NEVER eat the meat when she was a kid. And as an adult she was told the truth about Soylent Beef. So she has never tried it or cared to. Her senpai was pretty smol being the only child of a single mom.

>>30339589
Maybe not quite as mundane as most Earth parents. After all, they did fuck a horse. (or whatever non-human species the satyr is)

>>30339868
Well, meat isn't healthy for horses anyway. Don't want Fluttershy getting gassy from eating food her digestive system isn't properly equipped to handle.

>>30340273
Gassy Fluttershy was an awrard night for both of them

>>30340395
Which is why ponies don't eat meat

>>30339568
Awesome.
There's an awesome meter you have to break in order to get into Equestria. At least there was before Princess Twilight "Diversity is our Strength" Sparkle took office.
Now they just let any one in.

>>30340831
>Found the Dashturd
Hey, Rainbow CRASH! How about you go open a dictionary and learn some new adjectives.

>>30340273
>>30340395
I imagine this would be a bit of an issue for all human-pony or other herbivore families. Humans and satyrs would prefer and to some degree require meat as part of their diet, but the waifu would have to stick to mostly vegetables, fruit and pastries.

>>30340933
Go fish.

>>30339868
>meat is on the menu
boys

>>30340987
>Nobody is impressed when dad says this.
>And he always does.

>>30340986
Fish is meat. I doubt horses should be eating fish either.

>>30340878
Here's one I picked out just for you: leaky
It's a real treat watching any potential you have just go drip-drip-drip.
dash a shit

>>30340987

"Looks like meat's back on the menu, boys."
>A moment passed, Timber looking confused before at last speaking up.
>"Uh... dad, I'm the only other boy here. Who are you talking to?"
"Quiet, my lad, unless you want to go back to maggoty bread."
>Thorn groaned.
>"Ugh, he's doing it again. Sooo uncool."

>No DJ and his dad's day pics
Did he die a death?

>>30341590
He probably just got drunk and fell asleep.

>>30341599
Yeah probably

What do the people want?

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>>30342639
Parental good feels and incest.

>>30342639
Family feels and SoL fun, adventures, action.

>>30342639
Cuteness &/or humor.

>>30342639
Satyrs having adventures like the one in the show

>>30342660
This.

>>30342665
>>30342681
>>30342999
Any of these, and cute friendship times like the show. Not adventure friendship times, that was already mentioned, "townie" friendship times

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Don't forget to tuck your kid into bed and read them a bedtime story.

>>30344021
It'd be funny if, even after all this time, their human parent still had trouble reading equestrian writing.

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Bump
what is doing your satyr on summer?
a job?
spending time on the beach?
spending time on home like a neet?
looking sexy on his swimsuit?

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>>30344021
ok, but it's kind of a scary story.

>>30344205
>tries to read bedtime story to their kid
>kid ends up reading to him

>>30346042
>Kids help you with your Equish.
>You bond by teaching them English/[your native tongue here], telling them it's now a special thing only you share.

bump
we're kinda slow today

>>30347492
We're slow everyday

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Goodnight /sat/
i'm still thinking a /sat/ discord would be great
>>30345387
>looking sexy on his swimsuit?
you can bet

>>30348498
Discords are fucking death knells for any general, lets seriously fucking not.

>>30345387
Ace: Work, lifeguard
Hotshot: Work, part-timing at the Rainbow Falls exchange
Allie: homemaking
Rocket&Ratchet: neet life, building a working jetpack for their Rocketeer cosplay

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>>30348512
the /dzg/ its more active since the discord appered, same for /trap/
Just saying

>>30348603
The /dzg/ doesn't have the divide we do. Not saying a discord is a bad idea, just saying the comparisons for what it's done to other generals don't necessarily apply here.

>>30348603
Correlation != Causation.

I'd be mostly opposed to us getting a Discord without a clear reasoning behind it beyond just "hey lets have a discord!!1", cause it seems like it'd be a nice way to just generate a lot of pointless circlejerk drama and slow the thread down.

>>30348603
If that's true, they're exceptions.
Most of the time, it becomes a speshul klub for the content creators that devolves into a circlejerk where any minor grievance they might have is over-validated until it festers into hatred and them losing interest altogether.
Or the community more or less moves to the discord, then slowly dries up due to lack of new people.

Unless a community is very large like old AIE, I just don't think it's reasonable to believe a discord can do anything except hurt it.
Satyr's not a tiny community, but it's far from large, and I'm positive a discord would essentially be suicide.

>>30348512
This. Let's never go there.

>>30348692
Have you forgotten that a lot of people have gotten range banned for no reason in the recent past? Where are people supposed to talk about satyrs if they can't post here?

>>30349254
also /mlp/ is the only place who talk this much about satyrs in general

>>30349254
The range ban was really annoying but I think that may have been new moot trying to shake down anons for more 4chan pass shekels. I have not seen any anons talking about it lately and its no longer hurting my phone posting either. I'd like to think all anons are free to post again but I guess those who are truly banned and have no home PC will be silent regardless.

Still, a discord and by that merit are only as good as its anons. We would just be carrying all the same problems we have hear over there. But maybe having a stricter platform where anons cant use 4chan culture to go "Why does this character have boobs! Kill yourself! Your art is shit!" and then say that if content creators cant handle "criticism" or their "opinions" they should not be here would be nice.

>>30349507
would be nice for keep contact with the content creators and keep the blog posting far from the thread and this
>>30349498
we're a big satyr place

>>30349614
Blog posting here is very minimal anyway. If we had a Discord or other non-anonymous chat, it would most likely quickly devolve into a place for hugboxing and "chit chat" amongst the "elite" that frequents it. It would result in even less activity in the threads and fracture the already small community we have here even more.

>>30349783
now you're being paranoid
>small
we're the only general with two thread working all the time

>>30349848
And what an overflow of content we get for each of them.

>>30350353
I sure hope there aren't any fragile items left in that box on the left.

>>30350353
>>30350897
Huh I'm getting a thought now.

>Derpy and her family move into a new home.
>Mid unpacking the girls begin playing with whatever items in the box
>You and Depry walk in on this
>Instead of getting upset you realize you have the day off and want to enjoy playing with your family
>You and Depry reach into said boxes
>Do you help the dragon
>Do you help the knight
>Do you mix it up and what did you pull out

Go. Add to this

>>30350951
>You reach into a big box and pull out whatever you got a grip on
>A chainsaw?
>Well would you look at that
>You found the box you packed all your tools in!
>The heck is it doing in one of the girls' room?
>You thought the ponies from the moving company lost it during the move
>Welp, time to write an apology letter to them

>>30350951
I form my own box kingdom along with my wife and laugh as my neighboring kingdom is being destroyed.

>>30345398
>Tell a scary story
>Your little kid can't sleep now
>Your wife frowns at you

So I've been thinking about how most cartoon snakes get a bit of extra expressiveness from using their tails as a gesture-extremity, but Mera doesn't really have the option to do that.

Are there any other ways to add some more expressiveness to her?

>>30353405
Her emotions get so strong she controls Kimmy; just a little

>>30353444
I actually kind of like that idea.

Bet Kimmy'd be used to dropping things in that scenario.

>>30316101

any stories where anon is a xenophobic asshole douchebag? I want to self insert correctly.

>>30356148
I think there was a one-shot like that ages ago where Lyra lives alone with Hope because her husband was an asshole who only wanted to fuck a pony or something.

>>30356148
Try Diaries of a Madman

>>30356502
He'd have to be a pretty extreme asshole not to want a cute satyr daughter.

>>30356793
And a cute pony wife.

>>30356998
That too.

>>30356998
Especially this.

>>30356793
>satyr daughter
>inferior half breed abomination of sin

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>>30357261
>horse pussy AND human tits
>inferior

Letting your daughteru play on page nine again? Don't you know it's dangerous here? Anybody would think you didn't really love her.

>>30357724
Now now, he might just be a holy crusader from the dark ages who just arrived in Equestria and still hasn't gotten used to magic, talking ponies, satyrs, and a couple of other humans from different times being there yet.

>>30358515
The humans in Equestria that become the parents of satys (& the ones that don't) coming from multiple varying disparate time periods & locations would be an interesting idea.

>>30358842
Yeah, I remember that idea being mentioned before. I guess that would make for some interesting possibilities.

>>30358942
>berserkers land in badlands
>feudal samurai end up in griffonstone
>u.s. civil war soldiers wind up in canterlot
I member that, too.

>>30358942
The main thing to figure out is who would have weirdo past era parents & who would have weirdo relatively close to being from the current day parents.

>>30358965
>>30358970
A question: if you could choose, then would you be a viking or a samurai or whatever in Equestria? Or would you prefer to be yourself?

>>30359501
Honestly now I'm just imagining a real viking or samurai being thrown off by historical reenactors that also ended up in Equestria.

I'd probably prefer to be myself, though if I had to choose between viking & samurai, I'd probably pick viking since I have some Norwegian heritage.

>>30359501
I'll be a professional magician and promptly find myself out of work

>>30359579
I'm sure at least some ponies would be fascinated by human magic.

Honestly sounds like a setup for becoming Trixie's husband really.

>>30359501
For Honor: Equestria DLC

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>>30359949
>"My dad can beat up your dad without breaking a sweat!"
>"Nuh-uh! My dad is so strong that he can lift entire apple trees just like that!"
>"Well my dad can catch arrows in flight! He's so fast that your dad wouldn't even be able to see him coming!"
>"Speed means nothing once he gets caught in a grip!"
>A third satyr joins in
>"Well, my father could blast both of yours away with magic just like that if he wanted to."

>>30360018
Do we know anything about these husbands? Names? Powers? etc?

>>30363009
So does Thistle sleep in a bed or does she prefer hard surfaces like Spike seemed to in that one episode? Half on bed half on floor maybe?

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When find a shirt that's almost scary with how well it would fit the life you've led.

>>30361627
From what I remember, they are just ordinary humans.

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>>30361627
>>30364896
DJ should be able to remember more. Try asking him next time you see him.

>>30365766
It's so nice to see that Giovanni managed to settle down with a nice mare.

>>30365782
>After getting his ass handed to him he is then transported to Equestria
>Where he decides to turn a new leaf and also has magic somehow

>>30366635
Well he sort of turned a new leaf anyway so

>>30365766
>>30365782
>"Daddy, there aren't REALLY henchman as inept as Jesse & James, are there?"
>"I could've stolen some electric mouse if I wanted to.."

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Shit's for free
https://www.humblebundle.com/store/killing-floor

>>30367520
Satyr plays Killing Floor?

what happened to this general

where are the cute family feels
where are the parents
why is everything shipping ocs now

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>>30367629
>why is everything shipping ocs now
Sorry to break this for you, but all satyrs are OCs

>>30367629
>Where are the parents
>Literally the posts just above are speculation talks of the Knights of Harmony, the parents of the mane 6 kids

If you are desperate for (you)s at least read the thread and troll based off that

>>30367660
Not like he's wrong though. This recent parent talk is a really rare moment.

>>30367983
Well personally the best thing he can do is nurture this discussion and add to it so that it can foster more productive talks and add content he supposedly wants to see. Not bitch and moan in the dark contradicting himself when people are actually starting to discuss said topic.

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>"Don't turn around! Oh-oh! D-d-d-der kommisar's in town, oh oh OH!"
>'RIGHT HERE'S FINE, DAD, THANKS, BYE.'
>"What? We're barely out of the drive-way."
>'We'll walk, thanks, love you, dad.'
>"..You guys are like squaresville, man..that is VINTAGE."
>"Too much listening to those beeps & boops that your mom calls music."

>>30367660
Don't respond like a hostile dick. All he said was "where are the parents?". You could have simply told him to scroll up a little and leave it at that. But naah, calling him a troll who only wants a (you) as well is much better. Maybe that will get shit started, eh?

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>>30368077
>Go into a thread you supposedly care about
>Dont read it
>Scroll all the way to the bottom
>Yell "OH MY GOD WHAT HAPPENED TO THESE THREADS! WHERE IS ALL THE PARENT DISCUSSION!"
>If they had taken the time to read the thread they "supposedly" care about they would see there was content starting but rather than adding to it they would bitch blindly
>inb4 using the excuse "W.w.well its always like that 95% of the t.time!"

>>30368102
And the thought that someone is reading through older threads to catch up to the current one is impossible for you to imagine?

>>30368034
I don't really get it. But the pic is nice.

>>30368164
>Going this far to defend a shit posting complain anon
(you)

>Melody receives a text from Muddle
>The phone says its an attachment with the file named 'DRAG0ND0NGERDELUXXX.png'
>She gets a call moments later
>It's from Muddle
>'Heyyyy babe~ You enjoying that pic I sent ya?'
>"Muddle. I'm blind. How do you seriously forget this?"
>'Shit! That's the last time I follow Maverick's feather brain advice! Sorry babe, it totally slipped my mind!'
>"I'd roll my eyes at you but I'm afraid they go off in different directions. Why did you feel the need to send that sort of thing to me anyway? I told you I didn't want this to go to fast."
>'I know I know! It's just that...Maverick and I were talking the other day and he asked if I was tapping that ass yet.'
>"...Uh-huh."
>'And when I said no, he laughed at my face! The prick! He said if I hadn't gotten my dick wet after five months of dating, then the girl's not interested and she'll bounce in a jiffy.'
>"Okay How'd it get from there to snapping a picture of your penis?"
>'Then...then I panicked, okay? I asked him how could I make you sleep with me as quick as possible and he said letting the girl see what your packing is a surefire way to get their panties wet and on the floor."
>"...Alrighty then. Thanks for beimg honest with me Muddle."
>'Waitaminute! You're not gonna...break up with me over this, are you?'
>"Relax Muddle, of course I'm not. One, Maverick is a buttmuncher and you need to ignore any advice he gives to you on women. He couldn't date his way out of a paper bag."
>'Uhhhh, I don't know what that's suppose to mean, but alright.'

>>30368388
>"Two, just because we're not sleeping together doesn't mean I'm not interested in you, silly billy."
>'R-really?'
>"Of course! I think you're cute when you try so hard to get my attention. Sure, you may have some anger problems, and it wouldn't hurt to workout that brain of yours every now and then..."
>'Heeey!'
>"But I'm not leaving you anytime soon. No way no how."
>'Shucks. You mean it, Goldeneyes?'
>"Absolutely, Precious Scales."
>'Oof. Well, sure glad I'm out of that shit! I tell ya what, I was mulling over whether or not to text yoy that pic for the better part of two days!"
>"Seriously? And not once did the thought of how my eyesight might possibly impede your plan ever cross your mind?"
>'It was the stress, I tell ya! I wasn' thinking straight is all!'
>"Yeah, I'll say."
>'Baaah!'
>"Hehehe! ........."
>'...You still there Melody?'
>"...Hey...Muds?"
>'Yeah?'
>"...Could you...describe it for me?"
>'Describe what?'
>"You know...what you just texted me?"
>'...'
>"...The picture, you dork!"
>'The pic-oh! OH! U-uh...geez Mel, I don't know. I don't think I could.'
>"Aw-what the heck!? Why not?"
>'Well, they say a picture's worth a thousand words, yeah? Talking about your dick outloud just feels...weird.'
>"But you boys do it all the time! That's literally ninety percent of any given conversation!"
>'Yeah, but that's no homo. It's different. I mean, it isn't like we're writing manifestos about the look and feel of each other's dongs, ya know?'
>"Oh, come on! Do it for me, Muds. Please?"
>'...Shit...okay. Fine, Mel, I give.'
>"Yes! Thank you honey~"
>'So, uh. Whaddya wanna know?'
>"Hm. Well. What does it...look like?"
>'Uh. Like a dick.'

>>30368401
>"No-pffff. Yes, Muddle, we've established that it's indeed a dick. Congratulations."
>'Hey now, I'm not too good at words, you know that!'
>"Yeah, funny considering how you pretty much talk my ear off."
>'Youch. Come on, Mel, whaddya expect me to say?'
>"Well...what's it feel like? I-is it...long? Cylindrical?"
>'Uh. Not...not exactly...'
>"What about the ring? In the middle?"
>'...N-no. Not that either.'
>"Oh...how is it then?"
>'...You got any eggplants?'

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If you went out on adventures with your family, then who would be carrying all the loot?

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So what sweets do satyrs like to eat on a hot summers day?

>>30368571
>not colonel crunch or banana fudgecicle

>>30368571
Gala likes orange sherbert
Cider likes ice cream sandwiches
Darcy likes those popsicle pops you have to put in the freezer
Peach likes sweet iced tea

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>>30368569
If you're smart have Rannie do it. If not an option probably the most fit/healthy men. Dad, sons, etc.

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>>30368587
>Banana fudgecicle
That takes me back. Never heard of the other one.

>>30368598
>Darcy likes those popsicle pops you have to put in the freezer

You mean the ones that are all liquid but then turn to ice stuff? Those are good. Peach knows whats up. Thats a refreshing treat that also hydrates

>>30368626
Would your wife or some of the kids insist on picking up all kinds of rusty crap you come across because you could sell it at the next town for a few bits?

>>30368775
>Not pick up GLITTERING GOLD.
TRINKETS AND BAUBLES. PAID FOR IN BLOOD.

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>>30368775
>>30368775

>Rarity gasps as she looks to the rare emerald found behind the dirty casket below "Anon honey look! Another emerald!"
"Thats great sweetie, but uhh..there is like a perfectly good torch right there next to it. Mind grabbing that too? We are like at 75 right now and I dont want to dip below that."
>"Oh pish posh sweetie since when has a little darkness hurt anypony? Ignore it we need the space in case I find more gems."
>Plauge Sapphire's face when

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>>30368837
>Darkest Dungeon
Which satyr going to be the Flagellant? What about the rest of the cast?

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>>30368598
>Darcy likes ice pops
too accurate

>>30368899
Is this new?

>>30368923
yeah i just drew it.

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>>30368880
>Flagellant
Probably a satyr who loves to bestow punishment on himself. Maybe Rory or Warren? I always imagine those two are always being down on themselves and hurt themselves to feel like they are being redeemed.

Utah would be the Highway Man as I am a fan of his gunslinger head canon. Plus he thinks he looks damn good in a flowing cloak guns blazing.

>>30368899
>That pic
cute as fuck.

>>30368931
Neat!

post emotion + satyr. i wanna make some satyr reactions for reasons.

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>>30368991
bashfull

Also can we post reaction images and a satyrs name? Or just the satyr image and an emotion in text?

>>30368837
>Sapphire as a plague doctor
Does Rory teach her some neat mixes?

>>30368991
Rory: Ironic humor to hide depression

Pogo: Overly excited sperg

Timber: Stressed sweating

Icarus: Why boner?

Garret: Hiding how gay he is

Bucky: Absolute apathy

Utah: My grandma was a WHAT?!

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>>30369029
Disgusted.

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>>30368991
Horrified

>>30368991
Hope: Sadness.

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>>30368991
>Apple Child
>American

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>>30369029

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>>30369225
Such a bashful cutie. Nice work.

>George and pony colt are gud friendz

>>30369210
So, fat and paranoid?

File: yuzu wishes for death.png (13KB, 426x519px) Image search: [Google]

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>>30369052

>>30369426
Looks more terrified than disgusted. Like she just saw a huge fucking dog and does not realize she can fly away

>>30369466
Yuzu hasn't taken flight once since "the incident" when she was younger, of which we shall speak no more. She probably doesn't have the muscle tone to do so even if she wanted to.

File: the remix and the original.png (25KB, 860x818px) Image search: [Google]

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im still working on some more of those reaction things, but have this
does reuben have a canon design?

>>30369501
>the remix and the original
jesus christ, that is actually something my dad would have my brother and I wear

File: 1453241239940.png (178KB, 1352x899px) Image search: [Google]

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>>30369499
>She probably doesn't have the muscle tone to do so even if she wanted to.

Really? I imagine she would have enough power to at least do high jumps into a tree or to climb onto a roof at most.

>>30369501
I dont think so, but he's a cutie. But maybe tone him down so he's not a full carbon copy.

>>30369524
Cheese's lad is probably just an awkward dweeb more than a super duper party satyr

>>30370171
Now I'm imagining him thinking he won't be able to live up to his father's expectations. (& putting lots of unneeded pressure on himself.)

File: 169433__safe_fluttershy_magic+duel_animated_beaver_bird_dangerous+mission+outfit_hoofy-dash-kicks_kidnapped.gif (975KB, 576x324px) Image search: [Google]

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>>30368775
Fluttershy is kidnapped by a dragon, and her lumberjack of a husband has to armor up and save her. Strong Lad Timber and Herbal Healer Ivy follow suit and gear up to join in saving mother.

>>30371716
What about Flora and Fauna?

>>30371755
I see them not being born yet. Maybe after Flutters is rescued Anon's reward is a 48 hour session of passionate lovin, resulting in them. The twins are told the tale of their papa's heroics many years after.

>>30371472
Is this new? I don't recognize the art style.

File: 1444800006631.png (281KB, 1349x889px) Image search: [Google]

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>>30371918
Very old. From a time before drama and missing content creators.

File: Hero_Hope.jpg (536KB, 1000x773px) Image search: [Google]

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>In a dark, mold filled carriage two shrouded figures sit quietly abreast one another. The only sounds are the metallic reins and trotting of hooves as the two horses pull them to town.
>Thunder rumbles in the distance as rain begins to pelt the cart, getting heavier and harder as the seconds roll by. Droplets run down the decrepit wood and onto the two travelers, one breaks their silent demeanor and cries “Oh cmon, I just bought this cloak!” The minty haired satyr whines before looking to her companion and smiling.
>The cloaked satyr makes no reply and continues to look to the floor as the other satyr frowns “You know, we're going to a place where we have no friends.”
>”....”
>”Maybe starting off with one wont be so bad.”
>”....”
>”My name's Hope. Whats yours?”
>”...Darcy.”
>”Oh, you're a girl.” She nervously laughs as Darcy looks to her with an expressionless glare that could be confusion or just as likely anger “N.not like that, I mean we can now split a room haha, you know, save money?”
>Darcy looks away and ponders a moment “Hmm..maybe.”
>The carriage slowly comes to a stop as a voice calls out “All right you two, end of the road.”
>Darcy exits first and walks to the front of the cart as Hope hops off shortly after. With a wet thud she splashes mud and water around her hooves as she winces in a short pain.
>She hurriedly tries to clean her armored hooves while the stallions at the front give her the stink eye, “Sorry, sorry.” She hurries before going to the front. Reaching into her cloak she brings out some bits to pay her fare.
>As the stallions prepare for their journey she looks around and notices Darcy walking to the town and races to catch up with her.
>”Hey! Hey!” She calls out as Darcy stops to look back, having reached her Hope catches her breath as Darcy quietly looks to her.
>”Are you ok?”
>”I'm fine, just not good with sudden runs.”
>”Ok.” With that she walks away as Hope scoffs